Although it was a long subway ride, and mom had said she wasn't allowed to ride it alone, Amelia spent as much time as possible at Addison's penthouse.

She had her own room there, with off white walls, a full size bed, lilac drapes and a lilac rug and her favourite part, a huge floor to ceiling window with views of the city. It was over 5 times the size of her tiny room at home.

"Hey Amy wants to stay here tonight." Derek told his girlfriend.

"She's always welcome." Addison replied. "Tonight, it will be hard...For Amy...and me."

"Okay?" Addison asked confused.

"You know my father died right. When I was 14."

"Yes..."

"It was six years ago today. He...he was shot."

"Derek, it's okay, you don't have to tell me."

"No it's okay. He had this store. Like a convenience store. And I used to pick Amy up from kindergarten when mom was working and sometimes we'd go help dad at the store...I'd help, Amy would draw or do coloring or play. Anyway this one time Amy and I were sat behind the counter. I was reading my human biology textbook and Amy was coloring. It was a cat...her picture, it's stupid but remember it was a cat. Someone drew it for her...the cat..it wasn't from a coloring book. Dad said he was gonna close up but Amy said she wanted 10 more minutes to finish her cat. A couple minutes later 2 guys came in. Amy and I didn't care people came in and out all the time. But then they started yelling." Derek said biting back tears. "They demanded all the money in the cash register and he gave it them. Then they asked for his watch, my mom gave him the watch for an anniversary gift earlier that year so he wouldn't give it to him. So they shot him...in the head...over an damn watch. Amy screamed but I put my hand over her mouth. They left then. They never noticed me and Amy. There was so much blood. He was dead before he hit the floor. I honestly think that's better. The police came not long after...and an ambulance...we were both in shock apparently, we didn't even think to call the police." Derek cried and Addison, although not usually one for hugs put her arms around him and let him cry into her shoulder. "I'm so sorry Derek. That much have been so scary for you and Amy."

"It was. Especially for Amy. She was 5 years old. The scariest thing she'd ever seen before that was the evil queen in Snow White. She blames herself...because she asked to stay...I think mom and my sisters do too. But it wasn't her fault. Even if my dad had started to close up when he said. He still wouldn't have finished by the time they came in. It would still have happened...I mean it wouldn't have been her fault anyway. She just wanted to color in her damn cat. But yeah...tonight will be rough."

"Thank you for telling me."

Derek had a late lab session so it was down to Addison to pick Amelia up from school. "Hello, are you here to pick Amy up? I'm her teacher. Celia Adams." A woman not much older than herself asked Addison. "Addison Montgomery. Amy's brothers girlfriend. How do you do?"

"Amy's had a bit of a rough day today. She's been acting out a little. Which isn't like her at all. She had to miss recess as she lashed out and hit one of the other children who called her weird. The other child wasn't hurt and was antagonising her but I tried to talk to her about how there's never an excuse to lash out then she made a worrying comment saying 'it's not like I shot him' then burst into tears and once she had calmed down she seemed to shut down for the rest of the day."

"I see." Addison mused wondering what the teacher knew and how much to tell her. She knew the Shepards were quite a private family but she needed to say something to explain Amelia's odd behaviour. "I'll talk to Amy about lashing out and ask her to apologise. I'm not sure if you're aware that Amelia's father passed away when she was young?"

"Yes. I've heard her mention that her dad is in heaven. So sad."

"Today marks the 6th anniversary of the day her father died. He was shot. Which May explain some of her behaviour today." Addison told the teacher.

"Oh goodness. I'm so sorry. That does explain her being a little off. I wish I had known. I would have kept an extra eye on her. I don't think there's anything in her file. I usually try to make a note of any specific dates that might be difficult for any of the children in my class. I'll definitely take extra care of her the rest of this week. I'm so sorry." Miss Adams apologised. "It's not on you, the family don't like to talk about it so that's probably why there's nothing in her file. I appreciate you keeping an eye on her though. Thank you."

They took the subway back towards Addison's Manhattan penthouse. It wasn't busy so they got seats together. The subway was a novelty for Addison, her mother would have blanched if she'd have known a Forbes-Montgomery child was taking the subway but Addie quite enjoyed it, and it was quicker than driving, or being driven in the New York traffic.

"Look Amy, Miss Adams told me that you got in trouble in school today" Addison said as they arrived at the penthouse. Amy opened her mouth to reply but Addison held up her hand to stop her. "Derek explained that today might be a difficult day for both of you,but I know that you know better than hitting other children so I'm going to leave that."

"Derek had no right to tell you anything!" Amelia snapped. "I'm his girlfriend Amelia. He told me because he wanted support. It's his story just as much as it's yours and it's traumatic, for both of you, for your whole family. I don't know how it affects you Amy, and I know you probably think that it doesn't, or at least pretend that it doesn't but if you have nightmares, or flashbacks or you just need some support tonight. Or ever to be honest. Please come to me, or Derek. Just don't struggle alone. We won't get mad at you okay?"

"Okay."

"Great now I thought we could bake some cookies. I've never actually done this before but my friend Naomi gave me the recipe and I got all the ingredients so I though we could give it a try."

"You're the same age as Derek right?"

"Yes"

"And you've never made cookies before?"

"No"

"Like not even as a kid for Santa?"

"No...have you?"

"Yes, of course I've made cookies before. Loads. every year at Christmas when I was a kid and a bunch of other times too." Amy rolled her eyes. Addison smily wryly. Amy still was a kid. There were a lot of laughs as they stood at the kitchen island making cookies, and making a mess. It was another thing that Addison felt she missed out on as a child. They often had cookies, the housekeeper made them but the children were never invited to join in. In fact the first time she'd tried to make pasta in collage she had no idea that you had to drain it before adding the sauce!

Addisons landline phone rang and she answered. "Amy, it's Nancy. She wants to talk to you."

"Well I don't want to talk to her."

"Amy. She's your sister so come and talk to her." Addison said firmly.

"Hi Nancy." Amy sighed. In less than 30 seconds she was yelling. "Nancy, tu n'étais pas là. j'étais là. Tu ne peux pas dire ça." (Nancy, you weren't there. I was there. You don't get to say that.) She waited as her sister yelled back in French "je n'ai pas cette conversation avec toi. Au revoir." (I'm not having that conversation with you. Goodbye.) Amy said slamming the phone down. Addison was shocked. Not at the yelling, that was semi expected when it came to the Shepard sisters, but she had no idea that they spoke French. Addison had studied French as a child as well as taken a class in college so she could understand what Amy had said. "Amelia?" She asked softly "êtes bien?" (Are you okay?)

"Oui..non Nancy est...I don't know how to say bitch in French."

"I mean Chienne is female dog so maybe that" Addison chuckled then continued. "What did Nancy want anyway? And I didn't know you spoke French?"

"Dad's mom was Québécois, so spoke French and English, she insisted we all went to French pre-school. I'm more or less fluent. Me and Nancy are best at it. Grand-mère says it's because we have French names."

"Is Amelia a French name?"

"No but she calls me Amelie."

"What did Nancy want Amy?" Addison asked circling back to her original question. "She thinks it's unfair that I came here instead of home because it's a really hard day for mom and what if mom has questions about what happened or wants to talk about it. And how it's not all about me. But I was 5 and scared, I can barley remember what happened just sounds and how scared I was. I know it's really selfish but I don't want to have to deal with questions from mom and my sisters. They like to tell me how I should feel, but it's not always how I actually feel. I was there and so was Derek, but they weren't. Derek is the only one who understands what we went through, and I'd rather be with him tonight, and you. It's a lot calmer and less chaotic than home. Am I an awful person?" Amy asked biting her lip, eyes glistening. Addison's heart broke for the tiny eleven year old. "Oh Amy you're not an awful person at all. What happened was awful for all of you, but more traumatic for you and Derek because you were there. If you want to be here tonight, then that's where you should be. You need to be where you feel safest right now, and I'm really happy that Derek and I can provide that for you. It's you looking out for yourself and doing what's best for you. You're not an awful person. I promise." Addison said sincerely. "What did you want to do now the cookies are done. I've got some board games, or we could watch a movie until Derek gets home, it shouldn't be more than an hour. I've got some videos in the cupboard over there."

"Can I pick the movie?"

"Sure."

"Awesome. I never get to pick at home" Amy went over to the videos and picked one out. "The little mermaid is my favourite!" She said handing it to Addison who put it on. They were about half way through the movie when Derek came in. "Hey girls." He smiled coming over to hug Amy. "The mermaid movie?" He asked before giving Addison a peck on the cheek. "Yep." Amy replied.

"Okay I'm gonna go shower and change and then we can order dinner. I'm good with anything so you girls can decide what you want."

They had pizza at Amelia's request and although Addison was just about able to keep the conversation flowing, it was obvious that both Derek and Amelia were more subdued than usual.

It was a Thursday so after dinner Derek found a football game. Packers vs niners so not a team he was interested in as a huge giants fan. "I think I used to watch football with dad." Amy said softly. "Yeah. Dad you and I used to watch the football. He loved that at least one of his girls enjoyed football. He and mom used to argue, like in a jokey way, about whether you were allowed to stay up to watch the later games. Do you remember dad taking us to the park and playing a bit of football? He used to ask me to let you win sometimes. Not always but sometimes."

Amelia shook her head sadly and replied quietly. "I was 5, I don't remember much about dad."

"You want me to talk about him. Tell you about him?" Derek asked. Amy looked over at Addison who smiled. "Please"

"I feel lucky." Derek started "because I had the most loving, funny, hardworking man in my life for 14 years. A great role model for me. You were his favourite I think Ames. Not that he'd ever say. But you were his baby. And a Tom boy. Not like your sisters. Dad was the 'fun' parent. The one who'd let us stay up late. Or take us to the park or movies or someplace when we should have been doing homework. He'd bring us candy while mom tried to get us to eat our fruit and veggies. He was a bit of a goofball. Always doing silly things to make us laugh. He worked a lot but he never minded having us there to help."

"I used to sort the coins" Amy said slowly finding a memory deep in her mind. "The quarters, dimes, nickels and pennies. Then he'd give me a couple pennies. I hid them under a floorboard."

"Yeah. You told us you wanted to buy a town. In England or France. With a beach and a big toy shop." He noticed Amy blush. "Don't be embarrassed. You were only five. It was really cute." He reached over to hug her. "Did he sing? A song with my name?"

"You remember that? The song is called Cecilia, but he used to sing Amelia. Amelia, you're breaking my heart, you're shaking my confidence daily." He sang and Amelia joined in. "Oh Amelia I'm down on my knees. I'm begging you please for a hug." Addison felt like she was kind of observing something she shouldn't so she went into the kitchen to make hot cocoa for the three of them.

The siblings came into the kitchen a few minutes later to 3 steaming mugs of hot cocoa. Not long after they decided to get ready for bed. "Don't forget Amy. If you need us come and wake us." Addison said.

"Just don't be gross." The pre teen said.

"I promise no making out tonight" Addison agreed and Derek fake groaned making Amy giggle.

Amelia couldn't sleep. She expected as much. She wasn't scared or crying but she couldn't sleep. About midnight she decided to get a glass of water. "Amy?" A voice said behind her making her jump. She hadn't turned the light on so as not to wake Addie and her brother, so there was only the light of the moon shining through the kitchen window. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." She turned around and relaxed when she saw it was just Addison. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I'm fine. I just couldn't sleep and wanted a drink. Sorry if I woke you." Amelia apologised. "You have nothing to be sorry for Amy. Did you want to come sleep in our room? Or I can come sleep in yours."

"I told you I was fine." Amelia said defensively. "I'm glad. But if you don't want to be alone that's okay too."

Amelia declined but a few hours later crawled into bed between Addison and Derek. "Are you okay Amy?" Addison asked it was about 2am. "Yeah. But I still couldn't sleep. I thought I'd maybe sleep better in here. Since at home I share a room with Lizzie." She whispered and cuddled into Addison's side.

About half an hour later Amy was asleep. Addison could feel her gentle breaths on her neck. "Is she okay?" Derek whispered. "Yeah she's sleeping finally. I hadn't even though about the fact she shares a room at home."

"She doesn't." Derek interrupted. "Amy's not good at being vulnerable so she just said that. Since I left to live at college she's had my room. It's tiny but she prefers it to rooming with Elizabeth. She probably couldn't sleep because of the date and thinking about dad. She'd just never say it. Mom should have got her counselling. Both of us really, but she was so lost in her own grief, plus she's a suck it up and get over it kind of person. Hence why Amy won't tell the truth about being upset, moms not good at the whole comforting this. So if Amy's upset mom just calls her a drama queen. I think we forgets she's 11 sometimes and falling out with your friend feels like the end of the world even if it isn't, so it sounds dramatic. But if she cries mom yells so she just pretends to be okay. All the time. Dad was the comforting parent."

"Poor thing" Addison whispered looking at the little girl.