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We're halfway through the story…

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He had finished dealing with his business much earlier than expected. Really, it had been so laughably easy that it had actually been a waste for him to show up. He could have left the problem to his subordinates, and it would have been fine.

But as one of his servants ran up to him, trembling in fear, Luo Binghe quickly caught on to the fact that other things weren't fine.

"What has happened? Speak," he ordered, a deadly warning to choose their words carefully staining his voice.

"Y-Your Hi-Highness! This- This one a-apologizes!"

"Get on with it!"

"Your- uh- Y-Your prisoner, he-"

Luo Binghe's eyes widened at the mention of Shen Qingqiu.

Just what had happened now?

"He man-man-managed to… get a sh-shard from a plate, and-"

Luo Binghe was already starting to charge toward Shen Qingqiu's room, deciding to deal with the responsible party later. A shard of a plate. As if he hadn't specifically ordered his idiot servants to use the wooden dishes that wouldn't. Shatter.

Someone was going to lose their head for this.

Because, even without listening to the rest of that servant's stuttered ramblings, he knew damn well exactly what had happened.

Shen Qingqiu had a sharp object.

So, of course he would have fucking used it!

His heart hadn't been this fast in a long time- definitely not since he'd combined the realms. He wasn't used to this feeling of cold apprehension as he wondered whether it was already too late or not.

It couldn't be too late.

Once Luo Binghe stormed into the room, opening the door with a resounding crash, he found that the doctor was already there, applying pressure to one of Shen Qingqiu's wounds.

The room was covered in blood, most of it surrounding the unconscious man, but some had sprayed across the floor as well.

Shen Qingqiu's arms were a bloody mess, mangled flesh still oozing with blood.

The doctor was holding a cloth against the man's neck, fingertips glowing with a healing magic that was rare in demons, but clearly quite useful.

"Your Highness," the doctor spoke first, voice urgent. "I am working to stem the bleeding, but would it be possible for you to use your blood to encourage the wounds to not bleed quite so much? I need to focus on his neck, but his arms are almost as bad."

Though it was technically improper to speak to him first, and then order him on top of it, it was obvious why he had.

Shen Qingqiu was bleeding out right in front of him.

It was easy to ignore the indiscretion in this circumstance.

So, with a short nod, Luo Binghe began to control his parasites, telling them to stop Shen Qingqiu's own blood from coming out quite so quickly and to start encouraging the wounds to heal, though he knew it would take too long to rely on that.

Luo Binghe grabbed one of the blankets and ripped it so he could start tightly wrapping one of his Shizun's arms.

The blood seeped right through it.

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It took a long time for the two of them to get Shen Qingqiu to stop bleeding everywhere. Despite using his parasites and applying pressure, the wounds didn't stop until the doctor used his magic, but his healing spell took time.

Now, Shen Qingqiu was laid on his back with bandaged arms and pale lips. He was deathly still, with Luo Binghe having to watch closely to see the quick but shallow rise and fall of his chest.

"Will he live?"

He didn't know what he would do if the answer was 'no'.

He'd certainly revive him again, at least.

"I believe so, Your Highness," the doctor replied. "He's lost a lot of blood, but the bleeding should have mostly stopped now. I would recommend monitoring to check for reopening or infection, and he won't have a very pleasant next few days, but he should survive."

Luo Binghe let out a breath of relief. His shoulders fell, and if the doctor weren't there, he would have probably collapsed to the floor. Instead, he nodded.

"Did you prepare the sedative I asked you for?"

"Yes, Your Highness."

"Good," Luo Binghe said. "When can he start taking it?"

"I would advise waiting until he wakes up and seeing what state he's in," the doctor told him. "With as much blood as he's lost, you need to be careful with administering medications so you don't overtax his body."

The demon lord nodded, accepting the answer.

"I want you to remain here until he wakes up."

"Yes, Your Highness."

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His mind felt groggy, and though he tried to open his eyes, he found the lids too heavy, and he was too tired to fight for it. An intense ache screamed from his arms and neck, a deeply unpleasant stinging making him hiss at the slightest shift. Not that he could shift any more than that. His body felt even heavier than his eyelids.

Before he could even think to wonder what happened, he fell back asleep.

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Luo Binghe stared at the sleeping figure in the bed, feeling a sense of déjà vu. His Shizun looked so much like he did before he returned to the land of the living, dark hair splayed out like inky tendrils and limbs unmoving. His chest was rising and falling more steadily now, and his skin had regained a little of its color. He still looked ill, though. And the addition of bandages made it clear that he was.

Shen Qingqiu had woken up briefly a few times, his face twitching and his eyes sometimes opening a little. When that happened, the doctor had given him just a small drop of the sedative to encourage him to go back to sleep, and he did. The doctor had decided that a very small dose was alright for now, having weighed the risk of the medication with the possibility that Shen Qingqiu would fight/panic, and that it could be increased once his blood had been replenished. That was all that was needed, since Shen Qingqiu was already sleeping through most of his healing process, a combination of the blood loss and the energy needed to keep his wounds from killing him. It was just a little bit to nudge him back to the dream world in those brief awakenings. After all, they didn't want the man to wake up and do anything that would tear open the barely-closed wounds. It was easier and safer to just keep him still for the time-being.

Now that it had been a few days and the doctor's magic had done its work, there wasn't as much risk of the wounds re-opening. They still weren't fully healed, but they were healed enough. And so, Luo Binghe allowed the doctor to leave with orders to continue checking on the former peak lord until he was healed fully, and he waited alone. The next time the man started to stir, he wouldn't give him any of the sedative. Firstly because he needed to have him eat and secondly because he needed to see the man awake and relatively okay.

Fear hadn't been part of Luo Binghe's world in a long time, not unless he was the one inflicting it. He stood at the top of the world, controlled it, and even when there were threats to his reign, he took care of them with ease. There was little for a man with his power to fear. Yes, he occasionally worried about his wives, but that was usually a minor thing. He wouldn't even label it as fear- just a slight concern when one was ill or hurt or upset.

These past few days, however, he had felt fear. He had, at first, truly feared that Shen Qingqiu was either dead or dying. And then, once the doctor had reassured him that the man would live, Luo Binghe continued to fear this happening again. It was unlike him. His typical response to not wanting something to happen twice would be to simply not let it happen twice. He would just solve whatever the problem was, and everything would be fine. He didn't need to worry any longer because he fixed it.

Fixing this would be harder than a lot of his other challenges. All it had taken was one careless servant giving his Shizun an opportunity while Luo Binghe was busy, and look what happened. He nearly died because the wrong plate had been provided to him. And while Luo Binghe took care of the man on his own most days he could, wanting him to be his and not seen by his incompetent servants, it wasn't realistic for him to always keep an eye on him. He was an emperor who had matters of state and many wives to tend to. As much as Luo Binghe desired his old master, he was not all he desired. So, there would obviously be times he had to delegate the man's care to someone else.

He'd thought that, given his threats of killing anyone who fucked up while he was gone, his servants would have been more careful.

Apparently, he'd been wrong.

So now, here he was, waiting for Shen Qingqiu to wake up and fearing that something like this would happen again. He'd already managed to damage himself quite a lot in less than a year from his revival- would Luo Binghe really be able to keep him alive for as many years as he wanted him, at this rate?

Shen Qingqiu twitched, bringing Luo Binghe out of his thoughts so he could stare intensely at that sharp but elegant face.

He twitched a few more times before letting out a short, pained breath. Then, his eyelids started to flutter, and a minute later, green eyes cracked open. It took another half a minute before they opened fully and Luo Binghe was faced with the wide-eyed expression of his old teacher. Shock and fear mixed with disappointment in the man's eyes, and Luo Binghe couldn't help but frown.

"Shizun."

Then, to his surprise, wetness began to build up in the corners of his Shizun's eyes, a couple drops eventually growing large enough to roll down his cheeks.

Shen Qingqiu was crying.

"Shizun…," Luo Binghe repeated, his voice gentle as he tried to reach out and blot away the tears.

Instead, the older man's face crumbled, and he turned away from the demon lord, rejecting his touch. He watched as Shen Qingqiu started to tremble, small, choked noises breaking free of his lips.

If learning about the man's past had not softened his heart at all, then this certainly would have (or, maybe it only did because he had seen the man's past. Perhaps he would have grinned at this before). This kind of pain was different from the others he'd forced Shen Qingqiu to express. It wasn't the first time he'd seen him cry, but the other tears had been forced out through agony or uncontrollable fear. And both of those were rather rare. These tears, however, weren't just because Shen Qingqiu was hurt.

They were because he was hopeless, shattered so badly that he was upset that his suicide attempt had failed.

And Luo Binghe had been the one to break him.

Oh, how breaking him had once pleased the demon lord so much. He wished that he had looked through the man's mind earlier- maybe, then, he would have held back a little in his torture. Maybe he wouldn't have gouged out his eye or shown him the shards of Xuan Su. Maybe he would have been a little more content to just lock him away or kill him quickly.

Maybe he wouldn't have done quite as much damage to his mind.

He sighed.

"I can't apologize for having you kept alive, Shizun," he eventually told him. "Even if you want to die, I'm not going to let that happen."

Another sob escaped.

"I-I hate you…"

"I don't hate you. Not anymore."

The words escaped from his lips unbidden, and Luo Binghe was surprised to find that they were really true. It seemed that this event had been the last bucket of water needed to finish putting out his flames of hatred for this man. Rather than his hatred and desire mixing into a thrilling combination that made him crave more, a deep sense of unease and unhappiness had taken over his heart. He didn't want things to be like this. He wanted Shen Qingqiu to shout and scream and curse at him. Not cry as though he couldn't do anything else.

His words didn't bring the man any comfort.

"Please, stop," he begged. "I can't take this game anymore. Just cut it out…"

He brushed his hand through Shen Qingqiu's hair, making the man shiver.

"It's not a game anymore, Shizun."

Shen Qingqiu curled into himself, refusing to turn back around to look at him. Luo Binghe just kept running gentle hands over his head.

"I'll convince you eventually, okay?"

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'Anymore', Binghe, 'anymore'…

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