I don't own Transformers or the Riordanverse; they belong to their owners.
Chapter 9: Intermission: The Trident Robber.
Fade In: Ext. Planet Earth-Day.
(Piper Analog sadly sits on the bus on her school field trip to the museum. She is dressed in a school uniform, surrounded by other human children wearing the same uniform.
Piper Analog (voice-over)
"Today I am about to tell you about the greatest adventure of my life. It's an adventure any child should dream of having. My name is Piper Analog. I thought I was an average human child, but it turns out I am not. I will tell you how I discovered I am not an average human child in this story."
(Piper Analog steps out of the bus with the rest of her class and walks into the museum.)
Piper Analog (voice-over)
"It all started on a field trip to a museum. A place where artifacts are stored so we humans may learn more about our history. Like most human children, I do not like learning. I prefer to act out to get my actress mother's attention. She is Tristen Analog. A famous human actress. Because of her busy schedule, we do not get to spend much time together. This causes me a severe amount of distress and sadness."
(Piper's class begins studying a statue of Zeus.).
Piper Analog (voice-over)
"I am also very lonely and weird. And that makes me a target for bullies."
(A classic bully character like that one girl from High School Musical walks up to Piper.).
Girl Bully
"Hello, Piper Analog. You are ugly. Very, very ugly. I hope you die."
(Piper Analog starts to cry.).
(She runs off into the bathroom.)
(Piper Analog splashes herself with water at the sink. She looks at herself in the mirror. Her eyes are red with crying.)
Piper Analog
"Oh, human world of Earth. Why are you so cruel to me? I swear that deep down, despite my erratic and inconsistent behavior, I am a good kid. I want to find my place on the human world of Earth."
(The girl bully from earlier walks into the bathroom.).
(She scowls at Piper Analog.)
Girl Bully
"Hey, Piper. Remember when I said I hoped you died?"
Piper Analog
"Yeah?
Girl Bully
"I was not being hyperbolic!"
(The girl bully transforms into a hideous monster known as a Chimera.)
(Piper screams and begins to run away from the monster known as a Chimera.)
(She runs from the monster known as a Chimera by the statue of Zeus.)
Piper Analog
"Someone, please help me!"
(The statue of Zeus comes alive.).
(It gets up, and using the lightning bolt in its hand, it destroys the Chimera.)
(Piper Analog stands there dumbstruck with her mouth hanging open.)
Piper Analog
"How is this possible? Statues cannot come alive! They are just stones, which are not living organisms."
(The statue turns to Piper.)
The Statue
"They can if I, a human god, possess it."
Piper Analog
"Human god? So you are actually-"
The Statue
"Yes. I am the actual Zeus. And you, Piper Analog, are my daughter."
Piper Analog
"What? The Greek Gods exist?! And I am your daughter? Making me not a normal human child but a fantastical demigod child?"
Zeus
"Yes, Piper Analog. That is exactly what you are. And I need your help. Someone has stolen my brother Posidion's Trident and has framed me for the crime. I need you to clear my name and possibly save the human planet of Earth."
(Piper Analog gains a determined expression on her face.)
Piper Analog
"I will not let you down, father. I will find the Trident Robber and possibly save the human planet of Earth!"
Piper Analog (voice-over)
"And thus my adventure began..."
"And that's what I've got so far!" Thundercracker said, proudly brandishing his script, "What do you think!?".
On the lawn table in their backyard, Piper and Tristan stared up at Thundercracker with blank expressions.
"What?" asked Thundercracker.
"Well, for starters, your dialogue stinks," Piper noted.
"Yes, and the pacing is off too," Tristan added. "There's no room for proper build-up and suspense."
"And why did you change my gender?" he asked.
"I wanted Piper to be a daughter of Zeus!" Thundercracker explained, "All the cool heroes in Greek mythology are children of Zeus! Besides, it's not meant to be the actual you."
"Then why did you give the characters the same names?" Piper asked
"They're analogs of you two! I thought the last name change would make that clear."
"Why even use me and Dad in the first place?!"
"They say write what you know!"
"They don't mean it like that!" Piper growled, "And did you rip off the Disney Hercules movie with the Zeus statue?"
Piper began listing off more and more complaints, and Thundercracker kept trying to make excuses and defenses for all of them.
As his daughter and best friend bickered, Tristan couldn't help but laugh a bit.
Thundercracker clearly had the heart, but he had a long way to go if he wanted to be a proper writer.
I thought this chapter was going to be a pain in the butt to write, but I ended up having a lot of fun with it. XD
As always, thanks for reading, and please don't forget to leave a review!