Chapter 14
Jess was still pondering all that Ceija had said to him as he left Traveler at the livery. It was fairly late in the afternoon now. If he was going to make sure that he stayed in the same places each night and traveled at the same pace, he would have to start his journey in the morning. However, he also remembered that he had to see everyone in Laramie that he had talked with since he got into town. And he reckoned he needed to start doing that now in reverse order. Since he had eaten several meals at the café since he got to Laramie, he was glad that he had only had one real conversation with Maude. But he also knew that he had been by the boarding house after he had last talked with Maude. If he was going to do this correctly, he had to go back to the boarding house, and see Betsy Davidson before he spoke with Maude again. He wondered if he should ask to see Slim. He wasn't sure that he could stand the sight of looking at Slim in that wheelchair again, but, then again, he had to git back to 1870. If that meant doin' somethin' difficult, so be it.
Jess made his way to the boarding house. What on earth could he say to this woman that would explain his strange behavior yesterday? He still didn't have an answer to that question as he knocked on the door.
When Betsy came to the door, she gave him a rather strange look, but before she could say anything Jess quickly started the conversation, "Mrs. Davidson, I want to apologize for the way that I acted yesterday. I really wasn't prepared for the way that Mr. Sherman looked. Ya see, my friend that knows Slim didn't tell me that he was blind and in a wheelchair. When I saw that, I didn't know what to say ta him."
Betsy's face seemed to soften a little then. "I should tell you, Mr. Hart, I went to see Andy after you left here yesterday."
Jess's heart sunk since he figured that after talking with Andy, she probably wouldn't even let him in the door of the boarding house. But all he said was, "Oh?"
"Seems that Andy has been out to the Fletcher place since noon yesterday, so I didn't get to talk with him. Mrs. Fletcher's due with her first child. Sometimes it takes a while the first time."
Relieved that she hadn't talked with Andy, Jess just said, "Yes, Ma'am. I know I shouldn't jest left like that. I hope you'll forgive me. I didn't know what ta say ta Mr. Sherman."
Opening the door wider and stepping out on the porch with him, she added, "Mr. Hart, you need to realize that people are still themselves even if they can't see or walk. They can still think and hear, and they still have feelings. We need to make sure that Mr. Sherman still has his pride."
Jess was immediately touched by this sensitive and intelligent woman's words, "Yes, Ma'am, I understand."
"Now, Mr. Hart, I'm busy cooking dinner for my boarders, but you can still see Slim. He is out on the back part of the porch. This porch goes all the way around. You can talk with him out there." She pointed to the left side of the house toward the porch that continued around the building. Then she added, "He needs fresh air when the weather is nice. And I need to get back to my dinner.
"Yes, Ma'am. Thank you." Jess was relieved that she didn't follow him around the porch. He knew that he hadn't talked with Slim yesterday, and he felt that he shouldn't do that now if he wanted to reverse all of his actions. He very quietly walked around the side porch until he could see the side of Slim's wheelchair. Luckily, Slim appeared to be asleep this time. It still upset Jess to see Slim in the chair, but at least he didn't have his eyes open this time. Jess was thankful that he didn't have to see that Slim's eyes were not focused on anything. He quietly went back around to the front steps of the house just as Mrs. Davidson came back to the front door, "You didn't talk with him very long."
"He's asleep. Ma'am. I didn't want to wake him."
"You can come back in the morning if you want." Mrs. Davidson smiled at Jess.
"Thank you, Ma'am," was all Jess said as he walked back toward the café. He would be heading out of Laramie first thing in the morning, but he didn't see any need to tell Mrs. Davidson that. After all, she wouldn't want to see him come 'round again after she talked with Andy.
Jess ate his dinner at the café. He made sure that he talked briefly with Maude even though she was quite busy with the number of customers that she had this evening. He thanked her again for telling him where to find Slim, but he didn't say whether or not he had talked with him. When he left the café he went straight to the doctor's office; however, to his disappointment, it appeared that Andy was still on his house call. He knew that he would have to talk with Andy before he left Laramie, but he still had absolutely no idea what he could possibly say to him. He managed to get to the General Store before it closed for the night, and he bought what he would need for the trail. With nothing else to do, he decided to go back to the hotel and turn in early. He didn't really want to think about having to talk with Andy, but that seemed to be the very thing that kept him from going right to sleep. He tossed and turned most of the night. He wished that Andy could somehow understand what had happened to him. But how could Andy understand? Dadgum, he thought, I don't even understand, and I'm the one living in this hell. Finally, he was able to fall off to sleep.