Celegorm stared at his hands.

None of the callouses he had developed as a Hunter of Orome had transferred into this body, and he hated it. He hated how long and delicate his fingers were, hated how they lacked dexterity. He had tried wielding the cane his body had as a weapon, a baton if nothing else, but his muscles weren't eqiupped to deal with any sort of exercise and he hated it.

And it wasn't just his hands.

It was his entire body. He had barely walked up and down the castle they were in twice and his body was sore. It was like none of the muscles in this human body worked, and if every Edain went through this every time they tried walking, Celegorm's impression of Men had been severely underwhelming.

See, he was good at estimating how much effort people put into things like exercise, and none of the Edain that had lived under his protection ever had this much of a problem, which made him assume that it was this body that was the issue. But he didn't even have an explanation as to why.

The man, Lucius, was in the prime of his life. He had a wife and a teenage son, and Eru knew how much effort those were. Tyelpe had gone through his adolescent phase relatively normally, but Celegorm remembered how much of a menace the Ambarussa, Irisse, Arakano and even Artanis had been, since all of the had been sent to him regularly to 'keep them out of trouble'. Personally, Celegorm was of the opinion that haru had sent them to him to improve family relations, which had never worked before and wouldn't work then.

"Tyelko, get your head out of the clouds," Curufin whispered harshly, elbowing him.

He didn't have to whisper. There wasn't anyone in the castle who could hear them or see them. Celegorm had tested it multiple times, and had even managed to walk through people. He wondered sometimes how that happened, but Maglor had muttered something about 'Eru' and 'Valar' and 'cursed space-time folds' which didn't answer his question in the least.

"Yes, Curvo? What's your plan now?"

Curufin squinted up at him. "I want to meet this ever elusive brother of mine, who was apparently great friends with someone who looks suspiciously like that boy."

"Do you mean Harry?" he clarified. Sometimes Curufin gave extra long sentences to throw people off his trail, to leave him free to do whatever he was plotting.

"Yes I mean Harry," Curufin replied, with an eye roll. "Now come one. The boy won't miss us for a week, and since he expressly banned us from committing crimes, I say we go find my brother."

Celegorm wondered why he even questioned Curufin. Curvo had inherited a lot of their father, but his bullheadedness was all their mother, who had never budged from a stance in her life. In all the arguments Nerdanel had with Feanor, and there had been plenty, Feanor had been the one proven wrong, time and time again. And so, Feanor had bowed and changed his opinion. Even their last argument before the Oath had been similar, wherein their amme had been proven right.

"I suppose I should seek out my wife then," Celegorm said, and wondered why he did.

Curufin's shocked expression would have been enough payment, but Caranthir's additional choke on whatever he had been drinking was even better. The two of them shared a look and grimaced, and then turned to Celegorm in silence.

"You have a wife?" Caranthir asked finally, breaking the silence. He sounded like he was trying to contain his amusement.

"I didn't know you had it in you," Curufin added dryly. "I thought all your love and devotion and your entire heart was given to someone."

"A Vala in particular," Caranthir added, as if the flush spreading across Celegorm's cheeks wasn't enough. "I'm pretty sure you called him your master for a while there."

Celegorm took a deep breath. He wouldn't kill his brothers. He wouldn't commit another kinslaying. He was not going to kill either of his infuriating younger brothers. It was not something he would resort to. What would amme say if he did?

"Why, this is positively scandalous," Curufin continued with a sly smile. "First kidnapping Luthien, and now a wife?"

Caranthir, the traitor, didn't let it stop there. "Are you sure we shouldn't tell Lord Orome of this? Is this what your word amounts to, Tyelkormo? Betraying the man you're devoted to for two pretty girls?"

Celegorm swung, and connected solidly with Curufin's cheek.

Then, he lunged across the room and caught Caranthir's hair, shoving him face first into the wall.

"What was it you were saying?" He asked, voice tending to a growl at the end. He sounded a lot like Huan, who he refused to think about. "Please repeat those statements for me."

Curufin still hadn't rised from where he'd tripped over the table behind him and fallen, and Caranthir was practically limp under his hands, and when Celegorm shoved Caranthir away from him, he could see the way both of them were laughing, tears of mirth rolling from their eyes.

And Celegorm was called heartless and a monster by many, but he couldn't deny any of his brothers their happiness, not even at the expense of himself.

And if fighting pettily with his brothers helped him keep his mind of the family he had to deal with eventually, it was a good thing.

"So I heard the two of you are planning a little excursion to visit your families," Maedhros said, a few days after they had told Harry about their pasts. Well, a little bit about their pasts. They didn't want to burden the poor boy. More than he was already burdened that was.

"Yeah, I want to see this elusive brother of mine who has decided that hiding away from the public eye is a good idea," Curufin said, a bit too loudly, and Maglor, who had slowly been slinking away paused and sent them a nasty side eye.

"Are you sure you're not referring to our dear Laure?" Caranthir asked.

Celegorm covered his mouth to hide his laughter as Maglor included Caranthir in his glare. Their brother had not grown less fierce in the past ages, had in fact only grown scarier and more likely to draw a sword on them. It was only luck that he had no sword with him, which was a situation Curufin was aiming to fix. Celegorm thought it was better if Maglor had no weapons.

"I like how you're so threatened by me having a weapon," Maglor said, "when you are a wild savage who bites people."

Celegorm bared his teeth, and picked the meat that was stuck there out with his finger. Exactly like a savage would. Maglor shuddered, his delicate sensibilities not changed since Valinor.

"The next person to do that is getting thrown in that lake," Maedhros said, smiling politely. "And I don't care that it's winter. Since we're airing all our problems, how about some of us deal with the cold like those who crossed the Helcaraxe had to."

"If you come up with a more foul idea, I shall stay away from the forge for the next age of the world," said Curufin, who liked all things warm. Not that he had a sane sense of what was warm. Celegorm had seen him casually work with redhot metals, with minimal burns on his hands, and by minimal, Celegorm meant none.

"You would never manage that," Amrod said, popping up from whatever he had been doing under the table. Celegorm didn't even want to know, and it seemed neither did Maedhros. "Besides, what if Tyelpe invited you to the forge?"

"I bet 50,000 galleons on Curufin breaking his deal," Caranthir said.

Celegorm snickered. Caranthir using his newly found out inheritance to make bets that he would win was something so like his brother, it was hilarious. It was like someone expecting Curufin to be morally right in the forge.

"No one takes that bet."

"It's a great bet," Caranthir whined, but his scowl remained on his face. Celegorm never understood why he kept looking so gloomy, even as he said the most cheerful, sappy things. Not that Caranthir had ever said cheerful, sappy things.

"We can all see you leaving, you know?" Celegorm commented, eyeing Maglor, who had reached the door.

"Do you have to announce it every time?" Maglor exclaimed, throwing his arms up and flopping onto the floor dramatically. "Why can't any of you just let me wallow in peace? First you leave me then you don't."

"It's because we left you before that we refuse to do the same again now," Maedhros said rationally, patting Maglor's head, like Celegorm would have patted Huan. Maglor looked like he would hiss and bite Maedhros' fingers off, but he also looked like he wanted to lean into the touch, and eventually the latter won out.

"Whatever," Maglor muttered. "And if you guys have families in these bodies, you should go see them."

Silence fell across the room. Maglor had always known best about what would happen. If Maglor said something, there was a high chance that he was right, which was something he had been very proud of in their youth. Maglor's hobby was observing and analysing how people would act and react to his songs, and over the years he had learned to read his audience, any audience extremely well.

"Are you suggesting we leave this castle during these celebrations?" Curufin asked, as if to double check, just in case he heard wrong.

"It's not like we have anything better to do," Celegorm rationalised. "We have been directly ordered to stay away from that brat."

Everyone sent him some sort of looks, ranging from concerned to amused.

"Why did you call him a brat?" Maedhros asked, and then squinted. "What does a brat even mean?"

Curufin scoffed. "If you were more in touch with the human whose body you're inhabiting you would realize what a brat is."

"Oh shut up," Maedhros said, throwing the thing nearest to him at Curufin. With Maedhros' luck, it was a framed photograph, and with Curufin's luck, he merely caught it before it could hit him. Celegorm hid his laughter at Maedhros' comically offended expression.

"Well, I'll go meet my crazy relatives then," Caranthir muttered, waving the newspaper he had picked up from somewhere in the air. "Apparently, my older brother and his equally insane wife have escaped from a top-security prison."

As one all of them turned to Caranthir and the paper. Looking at the image on the front, Celegorm was struck with a sense of familiarity at the woman and the man standing beside her. Examing the memories from this body, he blinked at the paper in utter shock.

"You've got to be kidding me," Curufin hissed, jabbing a finger at a name on the paper. "You're telling me that my brother broke two criminals out of a high security prison?"

Celegorm saw that the name he had jabbed - Sirius Black - matched the names rising in his own mind. His wife was Narcissa, and she had been born a Black, part of the same family. Her sister was Bellatrix, the crazy lady that Caranthir's brother had married. It was fascinating how the three of their families were so interconnected.

"That's fascinating," Celegorm breathed, mind already racing with how much more interesting the family drama would get. "Perhaps we will meet them in the same place?"

Caranthir smacked the back of his head. "You have a wife, you moron. You can't come with us to meet the crazy brother, or the other weird one."

"Ow," Celegorm said, rubbing his head and glaring at Caranthir.

Then he froze.

It wasn't like he hadn't thought about it before, but it had slipped his mind that he had a son now. A son who did not like the brat that had summoned him. And well, perhaps he hadn't exactly informed any of his brothers about this new son of his, but what was he to do? He had never been the most child-friendly of his brothers, that had always been Curufin, Maedhros and Maglor, followed by the Ambarussa.

Oh Valar. What was he supposed to do with a child?

This wasn't even an elfling, but a human teenager. Based on his memories, the child was spoilt and nasty and entitled, despite having no reason to be. And worst of all, he had no craft that Celegorm could engage with him about.

"-gorm. Turkafinwe Tyelkormo," Curufin snapped and Celegorm startled.

"What? Leave me alone, Curvo."

He slapped at Curufin's hands that were moving far too close to his face. He would've snapped at Curufin with his teeth, but Maedhros would toss him into the lake and that was not his aim.

"Why are you so lost in thought?" Maedhros asked, looking amused despite himself.

Maglor who was leaning against Maedhros' legs and had one eye lazily open, glanced at Celegorm for a second before he choked and then burst into full bellied laughter. Everyone turned to watch him clutch at his stomach and wheeze as his breath left him.

When he finally had enough control over his tongue, Maglor choked out the words, "Celegorm has a son now," and fell back into helpless laughter.

Celegorm could do nothing but watch as chaos unfurled, with him in the center of it all.