A/N Once again, I apologise for my godawful upload schedule. I am trying to be better at uploading, I'm just failing at it. But, with any luck, this one didn't take almost a year to come out. I don't own Harry Potter or any other characters created by JK.
Chapter Three: Devious Plots
"Wow, looks like one of the Slytherin's ratted me out to Mother already. I thought it'd be at least a day or two." The other three looked to where a rather regal looking owl was flying towards them carrying a bright red envelope. Blaise smirked at them. "Sorry to ruin your breakfast, guys. Shame I couldn't have at least a bite before it arrived." The owl dropped the letter off to Blaise before quickly retreating. "Thanks, Mercury!" He then tossed the letter carelessly onto the table and grabbed some crumpets, which he began to spread some butter and marmalade onto them.
"Howlers tend to be a lot worse if you ignore them, mate."
"Yeah, I'd recommend opening it now. I swear my ears literally bled when we ignored one from our mum."
Blaise grinned at the Weasley twins. "The Zabini's may be quite upper class, but rumours of Molly Weasley's howlers have still reached us. I'm sure even if you'd opened it, they'd have still bled." The twins both laughed in response. "Besides, Mother wouldn't want to cause too much of a scene. I expect it'll be at a reasonable volume and mostly be telling me about what a disappointment I am for not being in Slytherin. Pretty sure I'll be able to ignore it." He managed to eat one crumpet before the howler exploded into flames and his assumptions were proven correct. His mother had quite clearly not been shouting, though the howler did increase the volume enough to ensure the entire hall heard his mother's voice expressing her disappointment and the shame he'd brought to the family. "Well, I couldn't block it out, but it wasn't too bad."
"Not too bad?" Blaise looked at the Irish boy. "Mate, I'm pretty sure she implied you shoulda been a miscarriage!"
"Yeah, I was quite surprised at that." Blaise grinned. "I thought she'd have outright stated I should have been one." One of the twins gave a low whistle and said it made their mum look like she wasn't even trying with her Howlers. "I'll be sure to compare when you inevitably get one." Not long after that, Professor McGonagall came over to give them their timetables and offer to allow Blaise to come to her office at any time if he wanted to talk about his mother. After she'd left earshot, Blaise turned to the others with a grin. "Do you think she really meant any time? Might take her up on it at midnight." Tonks glanced at her timetable and let them know they had charms with the Ravenclaws first, so they headed there after they'd all eaten.
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The first week allowed them to get into somewhat of a routine. They learnt that they all liked charms, Blaise would need to partner up with Harry to prevent Snape from docking them fifty points a lesson, they could have a nice nap in history of magic and that Seamus could blow something up with every single branch of magic. They still weren't sure how he'd managed that in herbology, bouncing bulbs weren't even explosive and they were just changing their pots. They'd all sworn to figure out how he did that, but Tonks had a more pressing concern that she brought back to their attention at lunch on Friday. "Right, we've been here for almost a week. Anyone come with a plan to deal with Snape?"
After they'd quickly dismissed Blaise's tempting idea of using his mother's presumed usual method of disposing of husbands, Harry spoke up. "As much as I hate Snape, I don't think it's him." The two boys looked at Harry with surprise, while Tonks gave him a sharp look to tell him to explain. "Well, while he is a massive dickhead, my scar hasn't hurt once in his classroom. It has hurt quite a lot in defence, though." Blaise was quick to point out that Quirrell had been sitting next to Snape at the feast on the first day of term.
Seamus shrugged. "That just means we got two teachers to get rid of." He smirked. "Maybe I could slip a potion into one of their pumpkin juices? If they sit next to each other at every feast, we might be able to get two for one!" Blaise snarked that Seamus wouldn't be able to brew the potion because it would explode halfway through making it. "I know, so you make it and it'll be fine. Me just touchin' it to put it in there'll be enough to make it blow up as they take a sip." Harry and Tonks both told the other two that they couldn't kill any of their teachers. "I know, but you can't tell me Snape don't deserve it. I doubt his own mam'll miss him." The other three all laughed and started brainstorming increasingly ridiculous and impossible ideas for getting rid of them. Harry's personal favourite was Tonks' idea to cover Snape's head with shampoo and hope his shriek of terror at having clean hair for once caused Quirrell's head to explode. They shot that idea down because they didn't think there was a shampoo in the world that could make Snape's hair clean. After they'd all finished their lunch, they headed to their next lesson, which was one they'd all been waiting for. Their first flying lesson.
That evening, Harry was telling the other three about how Professor McGonagall had made him the new seeker for Gryffindor as they got ready for their detention. During their lesson, one of their classmates by the name of Neville Longbottom had lost control of his broom and had to go to the hospital wing. Whilst Madam Hooch was gone, Malfoy had used the opportunity to steal Longbottom's remembrall and chose to fly into the air and put it on the roof. This caused Harry to give chase on his own broom and catch the remembrall after Malfoy threw it across the field, a feat that was witnessed by Professor McGonagall who promptly took him to the Gryffindor quidditch team captain. After the two of them had left, Malfoy started mouthing off again and said Harry would surely be expelled for breaking the rules. Blaise pointed out that if he did, the Gryffindor's had enough witnesses to ensure Malfoy would also be expelled. Malfoy's response was to call Blaise a pathetic blood traitor who no longer had any prospects of a future other than hoping to find an ugly Mudblood whore to marry to avoid loneliness. Blaise, Tonks and Seamus didn't know it yet, but one day they'd be able to power a patronus by using the memory of the sound Malfoy's nose made when Blaise's fist made contact. Naturally, Seamus and Tonks weren't going to let Blaise get the only hit in. Unfortunately, Madam Hooch returned at the exact moment Tonks replicated the move that got her suspended from the Muggle primary school she and Harry went to. Madam Hooch took one hundred points from Gryffindor and gave the three of them one week of detention. None of them regretted a thing.
They got back from detention at around eight o'clock in the evening and immediately dragged Harry into a corner to begin planning further revenge on Malfoy. As he was only a child, they only brought up the possibility of murder twice and quickly dismissed it both times. Another one of their prank ideas was dismissed as it could have accidentally killed him, though that's mostly because Seamus would have had to take part in slipping him something to eat and they thought his propensity for explosions would've caused it to blow up inside Malfoy. After an hour of brainstorming, they came up with the perfect plan. Blaise was even able to suggest some modifications that would cause it to catch one of their other targets in the blast radius. It would delay the prank by a bit, but they all decided it was a sacrifice they'd have to make. They had to put a stop to their plans as the prefects were glancing at them and looking back towards the clock, indicating that it was time for the first years to head to bed. Thankfully, the fifth year prefects were currently on their rounds as they knew the Weasley prefect would've come over to them to demand they went to bed. The other prefects were a lot more lax, usually not caring if the firsties were up for a few minutes after their curfew. Luckily for the Gryffindor boys, the Weasley twins came over to tell them that they'd heard about what Seamus, Blaise and Tonks had done to Malfoy and offered them any favour they wanted. Blaise had immediately jumped on this and asked them to cast a silencing charm on their brother every night for the rest of the school year. The twins had both laughed and offered their sympathies for having to deal with Ron's snoring and said they'd come in once he'd fallen asleep to cast it. Harry, Seamus and Blaise still intended to learn how to cast the silencing charm themselves, but now they had all year to get it right. They suspected that the other two Gryffindor's, Longbottom and a Muggleborn called Dean Thomas would also still try to learn.
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The plan was in motion. Tonks had taken the appearance of a Slytherin to get the password to the Slytherin common room and they'd paid the Weasley twins to charm one of the potions textbooks to spray paint everywhere when both Malfoy and Snape came within a metre of it. They were currently on the way to the Slytherin common room to sneak it into Malfoy's bag. "Are you sure there won't be anyone in their common room?"
Blaise sighed and turned to Seamus. "Yes, I'm sure. It's Samhain. That's a very important occasion for traditional purebloods, so they'll all be at the feast. And any halfbloods will also make sure to be there so they fit in. It's why I suggested we do it tonight." The quartet slunk down deep into the dungeons and were able to get into the den of snakes. As Blaise suspected, there were no Slytherin's in sight. There was a painting of a snake on the wall that hissed at the intruders, causing them to jump.
"Shit, what if he tells the teachers we were here?"
Seamus laughed at Harry's question. "Well, it can't talk. It can only hiss. So I think we'll be fine." Harry frowned in response.
"Yes it can." The others looked at Harry in confusion. "He just asked what we're doing here." Blaise's eyes widened in shock.
"Oh, Merlin. You're a parselmouth." Tonks looked at Blaise in shock, whilst the other two looked at him in confusion. "Harry, a parselmouth is someone who can understand and speak to snakes. It's a very rare ability and one that you do not want to let anyone else know about." Tonks nodded her agreement as Harry asked why. "The Dark Lord was a parselmouth, as was Salazar Slytherin. It's associated with the Dark Arts."
"Oh."
"It doesn't mean anything, Harry." Harry looked at Tonks. "Some people think it's evil, but those people are idiots. It's just something you were born with. Like your metamorphmagus abilities." The other two quickly agreed with Tonks, assuring Harry that it didn't change anything about their friendship.
"Harry, ask the snake if it knows which dorm room is Malfoys." The others questioned him about this, with Blaise quickly correcting their assumption that the Slytherin's had one dorm room per year. "Mother told me that Slytherin House has separate rooms for each student and is the reason that it's the best House. Obviously, it was just a way for Salazar Slytherin to show favoritism towards his House and get one over on the other three founders."
Harry turned to the portrait of the snake and a harsh hissing noise left his mouth, before the snake hissed back. Harry turned back to the others after another short hiss. "Her name is Hecate and she said that the doors have the students names on them. She also wanted to know what Blaise said about her master. I mentioned that he was saying that his House was the best one because I wasn't sure if she'd take kindly to the accusation of her master being unfair to the students."
The quartet quickly made their way to the dorm rooms and found Malfoy's room fairly quickly, slipping the book in his bag and removing his copy, before going back to the common room and leaving Slytherin House. As they were making their way to go to the feast, they were overwhelmed by a horrific stench. "Merlin, has one of the Slytherin's been shitting in the corridor or something?" Blaise waved his hand back and forth to waft the smell away from his face as they all turned the corner and froze.
None of them said anything as they stared at the hulking beast in front of them. The troll stared back at them. After about a minute, the troll roared at them and began to lumber towards them, raising its massive club as it did so. "Fucking run!" The other three decided to listen to Blaise's panicked shout and all began to run. By this point, they were closer to the great hall than the snakes den, so they ran towards the nearest staircase. They were almost at the top, when it began to move away from the great hall. "Shit!" They turned around and saw that the troll was clumsily climbing up the stairs as well. "Shit! Anyone know any spells that could help at all?" The others all shook their heads as the troll continued to get closer to them.
"Wait, I have an idea!" The boys turned to Tonks. "Seamus, try to levitate its club above its head and drop it on him!"
"Why me?" Tonks shot him a look and he sighed, raising his wand. "Wingardium Leviosa!" The club shifted slightly before exploding, the force of the shockwave causing the troll to fall over the edge of the staircase. It fell two floors down before crashing through one of the lower staircases and plummeting further, eventually landing with a sickening thump. Blaise peered over the side, informing the others that the troll was dead and not to look. Tonks immediately looked and pulled a face, rapidly moving back.
"What on Earth were you thinking?" The quartet of Gryffindor's looked up in shock, realising that they now had an audience. Their Head of House was staring at them with a furious look in her eyes, with the two professors they were most concerned about flanking her. "You're lucky you weren't killed. Why aren't you in your dormitory?" The quartet looked at each other in confusion. They'd expected to be questioned on why they weren't at the feast, not why they weren't in the dormitory.
"If I may interject, Minerva." The stern witch looked sharply at Professor Snape. "I don't recall seeing any of these four at the feast. I highly doubt they heard the order to return to their dormitories." The four Gryffindor's were even more confused. Snape coming to their defence? Had the world gone mad? "However, I am curious as to why they chose to blatantly disregard Hogwarts tradition and refuse to attend the Halloween feast?"
"I can answer that, Professor." Blaise stepped forward, mentally apologizing to Harry as he did so. "Harry didn't want to attend the feast. It's the anniversary of his parents deaths, so I'm sure you can imagine that he didn't want to be surrounded by people essentially celebrating it." Professor McGonagall's face softened in sympathy, while Snape's eyes narrowed suspiciously. Professor Quirrell was too busy looking around fearfully to react to Blaise's statement. "We chose to find a quiet room to relax by ourselves in to chat. We were just on the way to the great hall to grab some food, hoping that people had started to go back to the dorms. But then we ran into the troll. I think we all agree that we're very lucky to be alive." The other three nodded.
"And where is the troll now, Zabini?" Blaise answered the surly professors question by pointing to the side of the staircase, which was followed by the professors looking down and Professor Quirrell recoiling with a nauseous look on his face. Professor McGonagall didn't have as strong of a reaction, but was clearly somewhat repulsed by the sight, while Snape stared dispassionately at the trolls mangled corpse before turning back to the first years. "And how, pray tell, were four eleven year old Gryffindor students barely a month into their schooling able to kill a fully grown mountain troll?" Blaise quickly explained what had happened, clearly shocking Professor McGonagall by the strength of Seamus' seemingly uncontrollable talent for explosions. Snape's countenance merely shifted slightly in a clearly displeased manner, while Professor Quirrell appeared to be trying to avoid throwing up.
"Well, we shall clearly need to look into Mr Finnigan's… gift of detonation, but for now, each of you will receive twenty five points to Gryffindor." The four friends faces lit up at their Head of House's pronouncement. "For sheer dumb luck. And Mr Potter?" Harry looked up at the Scottish witch. "If you need someone to talk to about your parents, my door is always open." After that, Professor McGonagall left the other two professors to watch over the body as she led her students back to the Gryffindor Common Room.
Once they were in the common room, Blaise led them to a quiet corner and apologized to Harry for using his loss as an excuse. "It's ok. It hurt a little, but it was quick thinking and stopped us from getting in trouble. I'm more worried about how the troll got in." Tonks asked if he'd gotten the pain in his scar again, which Harry quickly confirmed. They continued discussing the troll for a bit, before the house elves sent up food and they joined the others in eating, eventually going to bed, exhausted after the evenings activities.