Chapter 39

When Feyre sat down opposite Elain at the table the next morning, Elain stared hard at her teacup. She could feel her younger sister's gaze and she could feel herself blush.

"So…" Feyre began softly, and Elain looked up, her eyes flicking quickly around the room to make sure nobody else was nearby.

"SHH!"

Feyre laughed, her eyes lighting up. "I haven't said anything."

Elain glanced around the room again. She hadn't seen anybody yet, but that didn't mean they weren't about. "No, I know…" she bit her lip.

"If you were worried about people hearing you, maybe you should have considered that last night…" Feyre grinned at her and Elain nodded. "If I didn't put that little shield up…"

"I know." Elain murmured, "I didn't think… It wasn't exactly planned…"

Feyre leaned forward on her elbows on the table, resting her chin in her hands. "Tell me more…"

Elain felt heat flush her cheeks again. "No…"

"Come on," Feyre pressed, grinning. "Does he fuck like he's got fire in his blood?" Elain stared at her sister who shrugged. "Just something I was once told about Autumn Court males…"

Elain rather thought the fire had felt like it was in her blood. "We…"

"Ah." Feyre sat back in her chair again, the smile still on her lips. "Just what I saw then…?"

Running a hand over her face, Elain groaned. "I can't believe you saw." Feyre let out a chuckle.

"I promise I cut it off as soon as I realised what was happening…"

"I know." Elain murmured, looking at her sister again. "Thank you." She watched her sister reach forward and pour herself a cup of tea before settling back again and cradling the cup in her hand.

"Still," Feyre mused after a moment, "I assume that last night was the first time something like that happened?"

"Mmm." Elain nodded, lifting her cup to take a small sip.

"Does that mean that you're going to accept the bond?" She heard Feyre trying to sound light, but the edge of seriousness in her voice betrayed her.

"I…" Elain frowned, "I still don't know." She said softly, "The intensity… of the bond is… overbearing. I don't know what belongs to me and what is the bond."

"The bond is a part of you." Feyre tilted her head, "Like it's a part of Lucien."

Elain met her sister's eyes. "I thought you would be someone who would understand the importance of making your own choice."

Feyre's eyes tightened around the corners for a moment before she smiled. "You certainly made a choice last night." Elain lifted her teacup again to avoid having to respond. "…I'm sure Lucien knows how to put that clever tongue to use."

"Feyre!"

"What?" Feyre asked innocently.

"… do you know why Nesta and Cassian were arguing last night?" Elain sought to shift her sister's focus on to a topic that wasn't her.

"No…" Feyre tilted her head, "I did hear them when I got back, though. He probably suggested she train with him in the morning or something…"

"Are they…?"

"Who knows?" Feyre spread her arms wide and gave an exaggerated shrug. "I don't even think they know what they're doing…" her eyes met Elain's again. "Seems to be an Archeron trait at the moment."

"Hey." Elain frowned, "That's hardly fair…"

"At least you admit you like Lucien."

"… I think I do." Elain dropped her gaze back to the table. The fire that had burned within her the night before had been beyond anything she had previously experienced, but she knew that it had been fuelled by the bond. What she couldn't figure out was how she might have felt without it.

"I think you need to discuss it with him." Feyre said simply, and Elain looked at her once again. "You're not the only one it surprised."

"…I know that." Elain swallowed. She did. She knew that it was unfair to Lucien to pull him closer with one hand, while keeping him at bay with the other. None of it was fair to either of them but, she supposed, at least Lucien might understand where she was coming from. Afterall, the bond had been forced on him too.

Striding along the path, Lucien eyed the Sidra. As soon as the sun had come up, he had left the house, needing to find somewhere quiet where he could be alone with his thoughts. On his way out the door, he had come face to face with Rhys. The older male had indicated with a smirk that he was aware that Lucien had spent, at least part of, the night in Elain's bed and that had been all the more reason to get out of the house before anyone else was up. Cauldron help him if Nesta knew.

He walked with purpose, even though he wasn't actually headed anywhere. The blood pumping through his veins helped wake him up even more than the cool morning air, however, and it helped him to focus his thoughts. Wanting to think about the previous night, Lucien let his mind wander back to when he had opened Elain's door and found her reading on her bed. She had looked surprised, but he'd been able to smell her response to him the moment he had stepped through the door. When she had put her book aside, a silent invitation, he had thought his heart might break through his ribs. He had been able to sense her nervousness, and his continued whisper of "It's okay," had probably been just as much for his own benefit as for hers. Lucien could hardly believe what had happened then. He had been more than a little surprised and so very pleased at Elain's reactions to his touch. He knew that she had wanted him, at least physically, but the way she had held on to him and the sounds she had made when not calling his name suggested that she wanted him more than that. The fact that she had allowed it at all suggested that she wanted him more than physically. Elain had so far been able to deny the physical pull of the bond easily enough. If she was allowing more now, then perhaps she felt more…

Lucien wanted more.

He found himself at the little bakery Elain favoured and, thinking it had been a while since he had picked up something sweet for her from the place, he headed inside. While he had loved being away with her, and having her all to himself, as they had gone through the Spring and Autumn Courts, and he so desperately wanted to continue on to the other courts with her, he did rather miss the little routine they had fallen into before it all. He had loved bringing her some pastry and sitting out in the garden with her while they had talked and begun getting to know each other better. If nobody else had claimed her time when he got back to the house, he hoped they might revisit the routine today. Talking to her about what had happened would definitely be a good thing. If things were progressing as he hoped they were, it would be best to be open about it. He knew that the others were clear about his feelings for Elain, but they really should be made aware of hers. He didn't relish the idea of Nesta trying to eviscerate him every time he was anywhere near Elain. Maybe he could even speak to Rhys about some kind of soundproofing for the bedrooms. He was certain the High Lord's room had some kind of protection because he knew that Rhys and Feyre couldn't go ten minutes without their hands on one another, yet he'd never heard a thing from them.

Deciding that he was probably thinking too far ahead, Lucien tried to rein his thoughts in a little. He would settle with one thing at a time. Get the pastry. Take it back to Elain. Get her out into the garden, so they could spend the day in the sun and talk a little. That was his plan.