Chapter 196

Watching Lucien from across the room, Elain chewed on her lower lip. He had been quiet since returning from his meeting with Helion, and when she had tried to read him through the bond, she had gotten nothing but confusion. Her eyes moved over him as he reclined on the couch, his feet up on a cushion, and that thoughtful expression that she so loved clear on his face. As she watched, Lucien lifted a hand and ran it though his ruby hair, combing tangles free as his eyes remained unfocused upon the ceiling.

Glancing down at her notebook, Elain closed it and set it aside. She then looked back to Lucien before swinging her legs around and over the edge of the bed as she got to her feet. "What are you thinking about, Love?" she asked, moving across the room and toward her mate.

Lucien just shook his head, and Elain sank down on the couch, resting against the edge as she looked down at him. His eyes, both russet and gold, flicked to meet hers and she remained silent for a moment. "Do you think she's his mate?" he asked, and a trickle of hope reached Elain down the bond.

"…who are we talking about?" she asked.

"My mother." He bit his lip as Elain looked at his face, "Do you think that she and Helion are mates?"

"Do you?" Elain asked, tilting her head, and wondering where this idea had come from. Perhaps Helion had said something during their meeting that suggested it. Lucien looked thoughtful for several more moments, before he sat up slightly, his hand running through his hair again.

"I don't know." He said, "Can you imagine if they were…"

"It would explain you." She replied, her eyes on his face as she smiled. "Is the purpose of it to create the most powerful offspring? You're clearly the product of two powerful fae… it would stand to reason they might be…"

"If they are, I have no idea how they have managed not being together for so long…" Lucien's hand found Elain's knee and she smiled at him. "I can hardly stand being away for you for half the day." He went on, "To think that they would have been longing for one another, the bond pushing them to seek one another out for so very long…"

"Yes…" Elain frowned.

"It must have been torture." He said, "Not being able to be together." His hand moved up Elain's thigh, "I couldn't have done it."

Reaching out, Elain ran a finger across Lucien's cheekbone and then down his throat. "I think you could have." She said, "You were gone for months… and even when you came back, you resisted what the bond wanted. You listened to me…"

"That was only a fraction of the time that they have resisted…"

"Yes…" Elain mused, "But you did not have the fate of entire Courts depending upon your decision…"

"No…" Lucien agreed, "I had my fate with you depending on it…" He smiled at her, "Worth even more to me…" Elain leaned into him, brushing her lips across his cheek. "But you're right," he said, "As High Lord, I imagine Helion would have done everything he could to avoid war with the Autumn Court."

"Even denying the call of the bond and his own mate?"

Lucien nodded. "I'd say so…"

"Then, what you're telling me is that…" Elain kissed his cheek again, her lips then moving to his ear, "… your ridiculous level of self-control runs in your blood." He chuckled then, and she felt one of his arms snake around her waist.

"It must, Petal."

Elain shifted herself until she was in Lucien's lap. "Did Helion tell you?"

"He said something about picturing his mate with another…" Lucien's voice was dark, and Elain closed her eyes. She knew that feeling all too well. The bond had seen to that. It had shown her Lucien's first love and her death, and it had also literally shown him fucking someone else, even if it had been during Calanmai and he hadn't had a choice. His hands moved across her back, settling at her waist, and she knew that he had realised what she was thinking. "I'm sorry, Petal." He breathed, lips at her throat. "I'm sorry that you had to…" he sighed, his lips gentle against her skin, "I'm so thankful that I don't have to see anything like that…"

"Oh?" she asked, "Would that be the limit for all that self-control?"

"Perhaps." He murmured, and Elain noticed his hands become more possessive.

"Do you think you would ask your mother?" she asked, him, "Ask her if Helion is her mate…"

"I might." He replied, "But… do you think that would hurt her? What if she's trying to recover…? What if asking her brings it all up and prevents her moving on and dealing with it?"

"I would think," Elain murmured, leaning into Lucien and resting her head against his shoulder as he held her, "that being free to speak about Helion, after all this time, would be welcome…"

She felt Lucien thinking about that, and Elain lifted a hand to his hair. She combed her fingers through its ruby lengths, enjoying just that simple touch between them, and the easiness with which touches like this came now. She also felt so very sorry for Ashk if Helion was her mate and she had been unable to be this way with him.

"I have to do something about it." Lucien breathed, and Elain nodded her head against him. "If they are mates…" he went on, "they deserve to be with one another."

"That's true."

Elain curled against Lucien, her eyes closed. She focused on her breathing when his hands slid up her back, caressing her skin as they trailed up her back and across her shoulders. "And what have you been doing while I was gone?" he asked, "You looked to be writing when I returned."

"Oh…" She thought about the smutty story she had been writing and she blushed, thankful that Lucien wasn't able to see her. "Nothing ground-breaking." She replied, not prepared to lie to him and claim it was a letter to Nesta or something else like that.

"You did look remarkably into it when I walked in…"

"Did I?" Elain would have supposed that she would have. She had just gotten to the bit where the hero of the story had finally managed to get the heroine alone, and they had snuck into a vacant room in the manor in which they had been staying. "As into you as I am now?" she lifted her head to look him in the eyes, and she watched his own eyes move over her face. Lucien's metallic eye clicked and whirred as he took in her expression, and she felt her heartbeat quicken when his hands tightened on her.

"I would wager that I could make you a little more into this…"

"Oh, I don't know about that." Elain grinned, pressing a soft kiss to Lucien's nose. "You're already my absolute favourite thing in the world." She felt the impact those words had on her mate, and she knew that Lucien's heart had surged, feeling it down the bond, as well as hearing it in her head. Even if she'd had neither of these, however, his expression would have given it away.

"You are my world." He replied, voice thick, and Elain smiled more widely.