Chapter 106
Ophidia in herba
"A snake in the grass"
"But sometimes I think sailors
have an extra sense that tells them
when they are in danger.
Sometimes I think evil is a tangible thing—
with wave lengths,
just as sound and light have."
—The Most Dangerous Game
He wanted to be upset with everything, but there was no sign of something lurking out in the woods. He'd run enough manic circles, checking and double and triple-checking that there was absolutely nothing dangerous around them.
There was simply no reason to be upset. There was no reason for him to be nervous, except that he was. He wanted to make sure—needed to make sure that she was safe and protected. Something goaded him to check and check again.
He knew that she was safe with Sango and behind a barrier—and to be fair it wasn't like he'd been a splendid protector either. She'd gotten kidnapped—more than once—and she'd been hurt, stolen, right under his nose.
He wasn't going to take the chance that something else might happen to her.
But when she'd wrapped her arms around his, everything in him had just relaxed. She trusted him. She trusted that he was going to keep her safe.
He didn't want her to regret trusting in him.
So he'd just have to make sure that she stayed as safe as he could possibly make her.
He'd gotten her food and made sure that she would be warm and as comfortable as she could be.
Taking the closest piece of meat out of the ground, he looked it over, judging that it was done enough. He handed the piece off to Kagome, and she leaned away enough to take it from him.
He watched her blow on it and then pull off a couple bites as everyone else took their pieces. He took his own, eating it in a few bites. He didn't have time to enjoy his meal peacefully. It was too risky to take his time. Too risky to take a moment to taste his food.
Not until they were back in the village.
Not until he had her securely tucked away in Kaede's hut.
He had to be on guard. He could run on less food than them. He could use less sleep than them. He would keep guard. He would keep them all safe.
"Inuyasha? Are you okay?"
"Fine," he muttered. Something cracked in the distance, not close, but he still turned to look at it.
"You don't look fine."
"I'm fine, Kagome. Finish your dinner."
She sighed, and he flicked an ear towards her, gaze turning towards her.
Picking at her food, she stared at it, eating a few small morsels, but there was still so much left.
"Kagome?" He asked. Something was wrong. "What is it?"
She shrugged but didn't answer. He looked over at Sango and Miroku, who both gave him a look that clearly said that he should do something, but he didn't know what it was. He didn't know what to do. He never knew what to do, so why now, of all times, were they looking at him like he should know what the fuck that he was doing?
His entire life was a list of fuck ups because he didn't know what he was doing.
And he'd clearly fucked up because she had been eating, and now, she wasn't.
So what could it possibly have been that set her off and bothered her?
For once, he didn't think that she was actually hurting, and the meat was fresh, and hers was cooked thoroughly.
So what the fuck?
Was it him? Could he have said something to upset her? If so, what could it have possibly been?
She'd asked if he was fine and he said that he was. He'd said actual words this time!
Well, if words got him into this mess, then they were going to have to get him out of it.
"What did I fuck up?" He asked her, and she looked up at him, both startled and wide-eyed.
"Wha—?"
"Come on, what did I fuck up? Just tell me so I can fix it."
Kagome darted a glance at Sango and Miroku, who just stared.
"You were eating fine a few seconds ago, so I did some shit that pissed you off, so tell me."
"You didn't do anything—!" She squeaked out a note of surprise when he leaned down close to her face. "You didn't!"
"Why are you mad then?"
"I'm not mad?"
"Fine," he stated, eyes narrowing at he stared at her. "Then why aren't you eating?"
"But I am?"
Inuyasha tossed his stick into the fire as he leaned back on his palms to watch her eat.
"Aren't you going to eat more?" She asked him, playing with the tip of her skewer in nervousness.
"I will when you're done."
"But you're hungrier than that!" She cried gesturing wildly to the fact that there was no food in his hands.
"And I'll eat more when you finish that," he said, pointing a clawed finger at her chunk of meat on the skewer.
There. That should solve the problem. He'd make her eat more out of guilt. It was a good, solid plan. Kagome would have to eat more this way. He'd eat more, which would make her happy, and then she'd eat more, which would make him happy.
Win-fucking-win.
"You can't do that!"
"Why not?"
"Because it's wrong!"
"I already said I'd eat more when you finished yours," he answered with a shrug.
It was all going according to plan—except that her eyes were already watering, which was not the plan—it was never the plan—the opposite of the plan, in fact.
"Kagome?" He asked, already sitting up and reaching for her.
He looked to Sango and Miroku, who just sat there wide-eyed at what was happening.
Great source of help and wisdom those two idiots were.
What was he supposed to do?
It had been a good plan! It had been a solid plan!
He'd just wanted her to eat! That was all.
Now she was crying!
His ears went all the way back to his head as he tried to figure out what course of action would cause the least amount of fuck-uppery.
"Kagome," he started, and she shook her head as he drew her in against him, wrapping his arms around her frame as she leaned against him.
"Don't go hungry!" She whispered, half-panicked, and he leaned back a little to look at her.
"Kagome, I—I'm not gonna starve to death in the next ten minutes or whatever."
She shook her head again.
"You—You always said that you were hungry as a little kid, and—and I don't want—that!"
She was upset that he'd been hungry as a kid?
He exhaled a long, slow breath. He was sure that it wasn't the only reason that she was upset, and this definitely wasn't the initial cause of whatever was bothering her earlier, but it was a start?
Letting out a long, slow breath through his nose, he mustered up whatever vestiges of calm he had left in him and tried to piece them together.
"Stop your crying. I haven't been hungry in ages because of you and that bag of yours, so knock it off and eat your dinner."
Kagome shifted slightly so that she was sitting in his lap, and he didn't stop her, instead using his hands to tug her closer.
"You eat too," she responded, sniffling.
"Fine," he said, leaning over to grab another spike of meat.
He tore bits off with his claws as Kagome did the same with her fingers.
"Happy?" He asked.
Kagome looked up at him as she chewed her small bite, and she gave him a smile with damp eyes.
"Yeah," she whispered.
"Good," he answered, nudging her stick of meat towards her.
She slumped against him as she ate, and he didn't care at all, shifting his arm so that she could be a little bit more comfortable.
He let Kagome sit out next to the fire for a bit, making sure that she was warm and protected. When the wind cut through their camp, he stripped off his haori, draping it around her shoulders to ensure that she remained warm enough.
His ears were up, twisting and listening for anything that might be a threat or a danger to any of them.
But it was nothing but quiet.
There were no sounds, and there were no signs of danger, but that didn't make him relax any at all.
Kagome laughed as Shippo made chased Kirara around the fire. She slipped her hand through the sleeve, and wrapped her fingers around his, dragging his hand into her lap.
She ran her fingertips from his knuckles all the way to claws. Her thumbs rubbed the callouses under his fingers and in the meaty part of his thumb. She stared at his hand as she shifted her head a little. He took a deep breath, resting his chin on her head, and catching her fingers in his hand, feeling her jump and giggle as he shifted his hand to hold hers more firmly.
Her fingers were slightly chilled.
So he moved his to hold hers more firmly, make sure that she was warm and safe and protected. That she didn't need to worry about anything because he was here—everyone was here—and she would be safe no matter what.
He would keep her safe.
He would—even if it killed him.
Kagome leaned her head back against his shoulder and shifted slightly in his lap, turning a bit more onto her side as she curled into him a little.
Before Kagome, he'd never pondered the idea of someone lounging all over him like a cat appealing in any fashion. But now he realized how much he was missing out, and just how much he really liked it.
The sunlight was just starting to fade away, and night was just starting to drift in, stealing away the last vestiges of the day.
Kagome shifted a bit more, clearly trying to get comfortable, and he started to ask her if she needed him to move or reposition. Instead, she shifted her hold on his hand and held it more firmly against her stomach. His other arm shifted to support her back a little more, and she let her weight settle back against it.
So that had been the problem all along. At least it was an easy fix.
His ears flicked back as something went walking by far off in the distance. Something four legged. He sniffed the air, but couldn't catch a scent of anything. It wasn't heading towards them at the moment, and nothing was sending his hackles up, so it must be fine.
That's what he was telling himself at least.
Taking another deep breath, he refocused on the fire and the girl curled up in his lap, who was trying very hard to not fall asleep.
"We should probably turn in. We will want an early start tomorrow." Miroku rose to his feet, holding his hands out to Sango, who grabbed them and let him haul her upright. He then looked at Kirara, who was standing near him with an expectant look in her eye.
"Would you like for me to help you up as well?" He asked, reaching down for the fire cat.
Inuyasha almost told him not to do it. Almost. The words were right there, but the part of him that wanted to see the monk get trashed by some little two -pound kitten was far greater.
Miroku reached down, and Kirara lunged, sinking her kitten fangs into the meaty part of his thumb.
Jerking his hand away only dragged the cat with him, since she'd locked her jaw like a dog.
"Sango!" Miroku said, holding up his hand with Kirara perched on his arm like a terrible pet bird. "Tell her to be nice again!"
Sango looked at the cat and then him.
"She's is being nice. She's using the small teeth."
Kirara let go of his hand and leapt down to follow Sango to the almost cave.
"Are you okay?" Kagome asked, starting to lean away, but Inuyasha's arm quickly stopped that notion. She was not leaving him to go help the monk.
The audacity.
"The wound that is deep is the one she is carving into my heart, I'm afraid." He turned to look longingly at the cave before slapping a smile on his face and giving them a small bow. "I will leave you two to yourselves then."
"Miroku!" Kagome hissed, gesturing for him to come closer. The monk shot him a glance before stepping closer and kneeling down in front of Kagome. Leaning forward, she got close to the monk's ear and whispered.
"I brought her back a little mouse toy. It's in the side pocket of my bag."
Miroku's eyes widened as he leaned away, and he grasped her hand, kissing the knuckles and letting go immediately.
"You are and will forever be my hero."
Inuyasha snatched the hand he'd kissed and immediately rubbed his thumb over the stained flesh.
The monk only grinned that smug smile of his, and Inuyasha glared.
"With that, I bid you a good night," he said and walked away.
"Stupid monk," he muttered as Kagome pulled her hand away, and he whined despite himself.
"Inuyasha, my hand is clean."
"You don't know where he's been!"
"Probably with Sango," she said, and he made a face.
"That's not any better!"
She giggled at him like all this shit was just fucking hilarious.
"Oh, don't make that face," she said, reaching a finger up to poke the corner of his mouth.
"Don't poke me with your Miroku finger," she said, and he jerked his face away.
"So is this whole hand ruined now?" She asked him as she ran her fingers along his jaw and then pulling them away.
Inuyasha raised an eyebrow at her question, snatching her hand and running his tongue along the back of her hand.
"There. It's fixed now."
"Ew!" She laughed, trying to jerk her hand away. "You licked the Miroku hand!"
"Now it's my hand. I licked it."
"I'm going to have to wash my hands at least three times to fix it."
"Hey!"
She giggled again, and he was perfectly fine being the butt of her jokes as long as she smiled up at him like he was more than enough for her, like he was strong enough, fast enough to keep her safe.
It was all a lie. He was anything but—past events had proven that.
He honestly couldn't fathom that she still trusted him to do anything for her when he'd failed so spectacularly when she'd needed him most.
He'd spend the rest of this life and the next trying to make up for failing her like he had.
He took a deep breath of her, trying to hold a part of her deep inside of him for as long as he could.
"Alright, bed time," he said, scooping her up off the ground and walking to the cave.
"Inuyasha!" She laughed as he shifted her weight a bit.
"What? You nervous?"
"No, but I wasn't expecting you to swing me around like that!"
"I'm not swinging you around," he told her.
"You practically threw me into a tree!"
"I did not!" He curled his fingers into her, just to hold on a bit tighter.
"You did!" She laughed, as he shifted his grip so that his arms wrapped around her knees, while still supporting her back with his hand.
He stepped into the cave, settling her onto the sleeping bag.
"Stay here," he told her.
"Where would I go?"
He gave her a look that only made her grin wider.
"I'm gonna go bank the fire."
"I'll be right here," she answered, grinning the whole time, and it took everything in him to not lean forward and just smother her with himself.
"Smart ass," he muttered, tugging the sleeping bag over her. "Lay down and get some sleep."
"You're coming back though, right?"
"Like I'm leaving," he snorted at the stupidity of her question, as he stood up and walked back to the fire, making sure that it stayed warm and low for them in the morning.
He glanced back at the cave, staring at Kagome, who was sitting up and fiddling with her shirt.
It wasn't like he was going to run off in the middle of the night, so what was her problem?
As soon as the fire died down, and he was able to check the border and the wood, he ran a small perimeter of the camp, seeing if anything was lurking out in the dark.
But there were no mad villagers, no wolves, no long glowing serpents waiting in the trees.
There was nothing out here that sought to take her away from him. Nothing at all.
But that didn't mean that they were safe.
"Inuyasha?" Kagome called in a quiet whisper, and he left his study of the trees and the forest to join her.
He shouldn't.
He should stay out here, make sure he caught the sight and sound of danger as soon as he could, but he didn't want to.
It was never a problem before. He'd never minded being up in the trees watching over everyone, but it had slowly started to feel more and more like a form of bodily torture.
She sat in the same place that he'd left her in.
"You're supposed to be sleeping," he whispered to her, and she just held her arms out in his direction.
Leaning down, he let her wrap her arms around him, pulling him into a hug.
"You were gone for a long time."
He started to say something, but he couldn't find the right words to say it, so he let it stay deep within him.
He turned his head slightly, pressing a light kiss to her hair.
"Come on," he whispered. "You need to sleep."
She let out a pathetic whine as he started to pull away from her, grabbing onto his sleeves and holding onto him firmly, like he was trying to leave her.
"You'll stay?" She asked, her eyes wide and fearful as she looked at him in the dark. He knew that she could probably only see the basic shapes and shadows in this lighting, and if staying with her tonight was enough to burn that look off her face, then who was he to take that comfort away from her?
"Idiot, lay down, would you?"
Kagome stretched out in her sleeping bag, scooting back as far as she could go and holding her arm out to him.
He shouldn't do this.
He shouldn't lay down next to her.
He should be out there, watching, keeping them all safe.
But he could do that here, couldn't he? He could keep her safe and comfortable and unafraid.
The moment that he stretched out, she moved to press herself against him, and his arm wound its way around her waist, tugging her to him so that she could leech whatever body heat she needed from him.
She sighed out a long, deep breath into his chest, and he made sure that he kept his eyes open through the night.
Nothing would sneak up on them. Nothing would hurt her, because he shouldn't be doing this.
"I'm sorry," she mumbled into his chest, the heat of her breath making him shiver.
"Don't be," he whispered back, curling up against her a little more.
He would never be sorry of this. Never regret what he had and what she was willing to give him. It was more than he'd ever hoped to have, and he wanted to keep it, nurture it.
"Inuyasha?"
"Go to sleep, Kagome," he ordered, shifting his head so that his order seemed finite and resolute, even though it wasn't.
She wriggled a bit, finding a comfortable spot before he felt her drift off.
Good. Now he could focus.
Morning came eventually, but it had felt like a very long night. Every sound had his ears perked, and his muscles tensed in concern and readiness.
His fingers had taken to tracing imaginary patterns into her back through the blanket. Just something to keep his hands busy, because his senses felt overloaded.
Every single noise had ensured that he couldn't close his eyes for more than a moment, for fear of something or someone sneaking up on them. There were too many things to worry about, and even though he knew that there was almost zero likelihood of anyone being able to keep up with them on their way back to the village, he knew it wasn't an impossibility.
There was always a chance, and there was always a chance that something would take her away.
He couldn't risk it.
He'd never make it without her.
Pulling himself away slowly and carefully, he untucked his arm from under head, letting his fingers drift through her hair in the process. His reward for disentangling himself from her before she woke up.
He was glad that she didn't.
And also not.
He went and stoked the fire that had almost gone out during the night, but still managed to brandish a few embers when he'd dug deep enough, rattling the bits about until it had started to creep back into a good sized fire.
Miroku woke as he was finishing up with the fire.
"I'm gonna go find some fish or bird for breakfast," he said, hoping that Miroku got the hint. "Stay here."
It was added just to insure that Miroku didn't so something foolish, like leave everyone unguarded.
"Sure," the monk said, sitting down next to the entrance.
Inuyasha nodded, giving a final glance over at Kagome before leaping away and heading off towards the stream.
Birds or fish, whichever came first.
The answer was fish. The birds were being fucking assholes and hiding themselves.
He had some decent sized fish to bring back, and it would be a solid enough breakfast to tie them over until their next break.
"You're sure that he's not angry?" Kagome asked as he walked back to camp. His clothes were mostly dry at this point, though the hems seemed to retain the dampness a bit more than he liked.
"I am quite sure," Miroku told her with a small chuckle. "He merely went to go fetch some breakfast and that was all."
Kagome didn't say anything, but Inuyasha could already envision that stupid little frown on her face when he came into the clearing.
He stepped in, and he couldn't help but see Kagome perk up when she saw him.
The fuel that gave his pride was probably unhealthy, but the fact that she looked happier to see him walking into the clearing when Shippo was already running around with Kirara, made him preen and hold his catches up a little higher.
Sango had a pot of water boiling over the stove.
"Inuyasha!" Kagome grinned as she looked at him, and he couldn't help but smile back, until he noticed where she was sitting.
"Why're you out here?"
He shoved the fish at Miroku, not bothering to show his enjoyment at the fact that one of them did smack him in the face.
"Wha?" She asked. "Oh, Miroku helped me up."
Inuyasha turned towards the monk, who was actively not looking at him and instead making a very big effort to make sure that they did make eye contact.
"Monk," he growled.
"My hands were all in appropriate places! Kagome asked me to! Sango said it was fine! I did nothing wrong!"
"Inuyasha," Kagome said, and he turned his gaze back to her. "Thank you for getting us breakfast."
How did she manage to do that? He was always tense and frustrated, and then she just says something, and it was just gone.
If he didn't know better, he'd swear that she was a witch.
Maybe she was.
Who was he kidding? He wouldn't care.
He'd still love her even if she could turn him into a toad or whatever.
"Keh," was all he managed to get out as she smiled at him.
He looked around at the camp, but there was honestly nothing for him to be pissed about. She was still against protected by the others, and Kirara was making rounds around the camp with Shippo.
Yeah, well, he was still going to be pissy anyway because why not?
"You good?" He asked her and she nodded, but he could see the way that she wrung her fingers around themselves.
She wasn't good or fine or any of the words that she liked to say when asked.
He reached out, resting a hand on her fingers, and she stilled, looking up at him for a moment and then away.
She took a deep breath, one that stuttered as she inhaled, and her eyes grew wide, blinking rapidly.
She was going to cry, despite his efforts to calm her.
"You want a blanket?" He asked her, and she nodded. "Wait here," he said, quickly turning towards the cave to grab her a blanket from her bag.
When he walked back, he saw her holding herself, hunched over, and he draped the blanket slowly around her shoulders as she stared into the fire.
Breaking her gaze from the flames, she looked up at him, flashing a smile.
"Thanks," she said, and he wanted to ask her so many things, but he didn't know where to start.
So instead, he looked at the fire with her, resting a hand lightly on her back.
"Alright!" Miroku said holding out the fish, now cleaned, and staking them near the fire.
Sango appeared carrying a pot of water for boiling.
As the others gathered around, Kagome smiled at them, but even Inuyasha could feel the tension radiating off of her.
He didn't bother asking her what was wrong, because he knew what was wrong.
It was the same thing he felt.
Something bad was just waiting off in the wings to come out and attack them. Something that wanted to tear them apart again, and he wasn't going to let it happen.
He never wanted to be apart from her; he never wanted to hear her cry like she did in Kaede's hut or the cave.
He rubbed her back lightly, feeling her lean against him ever so slightly.
He'd give her as much support as she needed, and he'd hold her up for as long as she couldn't do it alone. He'd hold her up for as long as she'd let him handle the job.
It was late morning when they'd finally packed up and headed out.
"You ready to go?" He asked as he got her situated on his back and ready to run.
Sango and Miroku had saddled up Kirara with her bag, and he felt her fingers grab onto his haori.
She'd insisted that he should wear it instead of her.
"I got you," he told her, and she nodded into his shoulder.
"I know. It's just—" She started before letting the statement drop off.
"Something feel weird?" He asked, and she stayed quiet for a long moment.
"Not bad, just—not good either."
He understood that feeling. He'd been anxious all day. He'd wanted to leave earlier this morning, but he'd also wanted to give her time to eat and make sure that she ate enough.
"You two ready?" Miroku asked as Kirara stood up.
"We're good if you are," Inuyasha said, gripping her legs tightly to keep her secure. Kirara leapt up into the air, and Inuyasha felt her grab onto his coat as he leapt up into the trees to follow.
She was nervous and so was he.
He hadn't felt good the entire time that they were heading back towards Kaede's village, but it felt like it was coming to a crescendo.
Except none of his other senses were concerned or said there was danger afoot. If anything, there had been absolutely zero issues and concerns the entire time they were moving.
So why did he feel so fucking on edge the entire time they were out here?
There was zero possibility that anyone could've followed with the speed and direction that they were going, so why did the ball of fear and worry feel so heavy like he'd sink in a river if he waded in too far?
It didn't make him feel good for sure.
Kagome stayed particularly quiet as well, but he could feel the rigidity of her body against his.
Inuyasha saw the strike. A youkai that came up right under Kirara's belly from the trees. He was too far back to stop it or make a difference, but she faltered, righting herself, only to be slammed in the side by a boulder.
"Fuck!" He shouted, darting in under her. "Hold on!" He shouted at Kagome, trying to dive into the trees to save at least one of them.
Keeping one hand under her, he managed to snag Miroku's robes before he hit the ground.
Sango had caught Hiraikotsu with a tree branch, slowing her fall. Kirara was already climbing to her feet and shaking it off.
"You good?" Inuyasha asked Sango as she landed.
"Yeah. I'm fine."
The trees shook around them.
"We need to go," Kagome said.
"We can take them—"
"No! We need to go! Now!" She yelled and her fingers dug into his shoulders as if she was trying to push him. "Go!"
Gritting his teeth, he fought the urge to ignore her.
"Let's go!" He shouted. Kirara shrank down, and Miroku grabbed her as he ran by. Sango glanced over her shoulder as she ran with Inuyasha following on her heels.
Whatever it was, it was big, but he couldn't see it just yet.
"Care to tell me why we're bailing on these fuckers?"
"It's not—"
The arrow struck him dead center in the chest, every muscle locked and he went down, sprawled in the dirt as a serpentine thing ran into his friends. Kagome rolled to a stop in front of him.
He could see her, but he couldn't move. A barrier went up around them, separating them from the others as red hakama stepped into the edge of his vision.
A/N: Thank you for letting take such a long break with this one, but I think you understand why I opted to not post this chapter before going into the break. 😁
I didn't realize how much work had sucked out my soul and how much it feels like the last few chapters have been lackluster. Turns out when administration hates you, it makes life very difficult to function, and writing as much of an escape as it is for me, also suffers.
I hope that you enjoyed this chapter, and everything that it will bring with it, so as always, let me know what you think.