- Chapter Start –
After surviving his nightmare of a childhood and clawing his way to the top of the cultivation world, Di FeiSheng believes he's immune to fear. Even when Li LianHua's Bicha poisoning threatened their rematch or when Jiao LiQiao's treachery threatened his fighting ability, he never felt true dread.
Up until now.
The last time he took Li LianHua's pulse was when he dragged him off to see the Drug Demon. Li LianHua feels so much closer to death now. His meridians have shrunk and his Yangzhouman and Qi are all but depleted. According to Fang DuoBing, the Bicha poison has already invaded his bone marrow.
Ignoring the icy fingers of fear squeezing his heart, Di FeiSheng keeps his gaze on Li LianHua's white face as he feeds him his Qi with utmost focus.
"Li LianHua, please…"
Di FeiSheng glances at Fang DuoBing sitting behind Li LianHua, round eyes wet and teeth digging into his bottom lip.
"Focus on your task," Di FeiSheng tells him. Now isn't the time for comfort, nor does he know how to give it.
"Right."
Li LianHua's expression changes just then, eyebrows furrowing and lips twitching. Something in Di FeiSheng's face must've changed too because-
"H-he's awake?" Fang DuoBing leans forward, trying to peer at his face.
"Focus!" Di FeiSheng snaps at him.
Li LianHua moves his head, eyelashes fluttering as he attempts to open his eyes.
"A-Fei... XiaoBao. Can't… a man… die in peace?"
The words are slurred, barely audible.
Di FeiSheng has to stop himself from gripping the front of Li LianHua's robes and shaking him into a million tiny pieces.
"No. Not on your life."
Li LianHua attempts to smile – a mere twitch of his lips – and finally opens his eyes. They're hazy and dull with no hint of the warmth and humour Di FeiSheng has come to appreciate.
"… sorry."
"We don't want your apologies," Di FeiSheng says through gritted teeth. "We want you to live."
"Ah." Li LianHua attempts another smile and half succeeds this time. "I'm afraid that's-"
"Shh," Fang DuoBing interrupts him from behind with a reproachful frown at Di FeiSheng. "Talk later."
Li LianHua rouses himself again, face scrunching in discomfort.
"E-enough… for now. My body can't handle both your Qi at the same time."
As soon as they stop, he slumps backwards with a groan, head lolling against Fang DuoBing's shoulder.
"Li LianHua!" Fang DuoBing grabs his arms, panicked eyes going to Di FeiSheng.
Taking Li LianHua's wrist, Di FeiSheng checks his pulse and then he nods.
"His Qi has stabilised. Let him rest for now."
- o -
A few hours later…
A single oil lamp sits on the small rickety table in the corner, illuminating an earthenware plate of rather gristly braised pork, another of mushy greens and a chipped jar of cheap wine. It's a far cry from the spread of dishes the young Master of Tianji Hall and the ex-Leader of the Jinyuan Alliance are used to, but the packed food they brought helps to round out the humble meal.
Lao Wang brought in the food and wine earlier, helped himself to some of it and left again. He seemed aware that he had no place in his own home for the moment, and astute enough to know there's no point in arguing with two cultivators wealthier and more powerful than him.
The rest of the food remains untouched. Neither Fang DuoBing nor Di FeiSheng have any appetite despite their eventful day. They sit opposite each other at the table and sip wine with their attention and gazes riveted to the figure on the bed.
Li LianHua is sleeping deeply with a steadier pulse than before and a bit more colour in his face. There's nothing else they can do for him for the time being.
"Why did Li LianHua give the Styx Flower to the Emperor?"
Contrary to this afternoon's outburst, Di FeiSheng sounds subdued. Fang DuoBing turns to him with a wry twist to his lips.
"How much do you know of the Pagoda of Bliss?"
- o -
"Giving the Emperor the only means of saving his own life." Di FeiSheng glares down at his wine cup. "He's telling him there won't be any threat to the throne from the only living descendent of the Nanyin royal family."
"You're pretty smart - hey!" Fang DuoBing jerks backward when Di FeiSheng jumps to his feet, knee catching on the edge of the table and rattling the dishes on it.
"That self-sacrificing idiot!"
Said self-sacrificing idiot stirs, but doesn't wake up.
"Shh!" Fang DuoBing stands up as well. A restless part of him can relate; he's itching for a fight too, but not here.
Not now.
With a growl of frustration, Di FeiSheng turns away.
"You care for him, don't you?" Fang DuoBing says. It's not a question.
"I care for the fight he owes me. You've heard me say more than once that that's why I want him healed."
"Yes, you keep saying that," Fang DuoBing says, voice rising despite himself, "but the only person you're trying to convince is yourself!"
Before he can blink, Di FeiSheng is in his face, eyes boring into his and lips drawn back in a snarl.
"Watch your words."
Undeterred, Fang DuoBing tosses his head.
"It's the truth, isn't it? Just say you care for him! Is that so hard?"
To his surprise, Di FeiSheng looks away and exhales through his nose.
"I can't."
Raising his right arm, Fang DuoBing flattens his palm against Di FeiSheng's chest, feeling the slam of the furiously beating heart within. He gives a shove, just hard enough for the other man to stumble back a step.
"You can. Tell me why you want him to heal."
When Di FeiSheng finally turns back, his eyes are reddened.
"Wait, are you cr-" Fang DuoBing begins.
"Send Lao Wang to get me when Li LianHua wakes up." Di FeiSheng leaves without waiting for a reply.
- o -
The walk – a cowardly way of escaping Fang DuoBing's annoying questions – lasts all of thirty minutes before Di FeiSheng finds himself back at Lao Wang's hut.
Fang DuoBing is kneeling by the bed once more with Li LianHua's hand clasped between his own.
"You two must've found it hilarious. When we were viewing the fake Shaoshi sword at Baichuan Academy, I praised your – Li XiangYi's Swordplay. You said he was ostentatious and A-Fei agreed. I accused you both of being jealous of him."
He sniffles and wipes at his cheek.
"Or the time I told A-Fei he wasn't there at that fight ten years ago so he shouldn't act like a know it all."
Another sniffle.
Di FeiSheng recalls controlling his temper each time by telling himself how amusing Fang DuoBing's discomfiture would be when he finally he found out the truth. He'd looked forward to sharing the hilarity with Li LianHua once the brat realised who they were.
There's no amusement in seeing him sobbing over an unconscious Li LianHua who can't even hear him.
Fang DuoBing wears his heart on his sleeve. He trusts too easily, too idealistic and naïve. He'd never last in the Jianghu like this, a treacherous voice whispers in Di FeiSheng's head. Not without you and Li LianHua by his side.
Li LianHua is enough. He doesn't need me, Di FeiSheng tells it. He'd endangered Fang DuoBing's life using Gang Qi. His conscience, shrivelled as it is, twinges at the memory. He fists his hands, not even feeling the bite of his nails in his palms.
He wouldn't have let the brat die, of course. It was just so that Li LianHua would… it doesn't matter anymore. It doesn't matter what Fang DuoBing thinks of him as long as Li LianHua knows the truth.
Nothing matters as long as Li LianHua lives.
- o –
"That understanding, that easy rapport you two have, how you seem to read each other's minds." Fang DuoBing shakes his head. "I don't have that."
"And yet you told me Li LianHua said you are his best friend." Di FeiSheng kneels beside him, his eyes fixed on Li LianHua's face.
"He also said you have a bad habit of eavesdropping on people," Fang DuoBing grumbles, not bothering to look up.
A minute of not uncomfortable silence passes before Di FeiSheng sighs.
"I just want him alive and well."
With a huff, Fang DuoBing turns to him.
"Me too. We're on the same side, you know."
Di FeiSheng looks at him and nods.
"I would kill for him," he says seriously.
"I would too," Fang DuoBing assures him.
"And I… would rather you two… not," a sleepy voice says.
Li LianHua is awake and looking up at them with that soft, fond smile on his lips.
- Chapter End -