It hadn't taken Zeke very long at all to get used to sleeping next to Nia. Feeling the heat of her body. The touch of her breath on his skin… She was addictive, in a way. The more time he spent with her, the better everything about her seemed to get. It had only been a few days, but he'd gotten so used to her presence that it felt strange to wake up without it. Disappointing, even.
Still, he managed to muddle through his disappointment and pull himself up, taking in his surroundings. He was in the infirmary, because of course he was. He'd taken a hell of a beating yesterday. Or whenever it had happened. He didn't actually know how much time had passed.
"He's awake," Pandoria said, startling him as she spoke up from the corner. Though after a moment, he managed to regain his composure.
"Pandy," he noted. "Didn't expect you'd be here to greet me."
"Disappointed?" she asked, giving him a wry smile. He didn't want to say she was right, but…
"Well, I was hoping to see my girlfriend," he admitted.
"Looking forward to having Nia dote on you while you recovered, huh?"
"I can think of worse ways to wake up," Zeke said. "But it's good to see you, too."
"Yeah," Pandy said. "Though if you were so eager to get pampered, then maybe you could've woken up earlier."
There was a trace of anger in her voice that gave Zeke pause. After a moment, he put together what she was probably here about.
"Sorry," he muttered.
"For what?" Pandoria asked.
"For running off and nearly getting myself killed. Again. Like you keep telling me not to do."
"If only saying it made it so," Pandoria muttered, shaking her head.
"What?"
"You're always sorry. Every time this happens, you swear it won't happen again. And I got used to that, y'know? I'd accepted that it was sort of just a fact of living with you. I told myself I was going to protect you because you were incapable of protecting yourself, and every time this happened, I'd always get scared that I wasn't doing enough. I'd get scared that you would mess up and that'd be that. But despite all that, I've never actually been afraid of dying before. Every time we did something stupid, the only thing I was afraid of was messing up and letting you get hurt. Letting you down. But now?"
Pandoria looked at him with tears in her eyes.
"I am fucking terrified, Zeke. I have a life of my own, and I want to keep living it. I don't want to just stop existing one day because you ran off and got in over your head. That's not fair."
"I know," Zeke said. "I'm sorry."
"Well, if you're so sorry then do something about it!" Pandoria shouted. He couldn't remember the last time she'd shouted at him like that. "Because I do not want to spend the rest of my life afraid that you might get us both killed! I deserve better than that!"
"Of course you do," Zeke said. "You all do. You, Electra, Nia… You all deserve better. I need to stop acting like what happens to me doesn't affect anybody else."
"Well, it's…" Pandoria shook her head. "I guess it's good to hear you say it, at least. I'm just not sure how I'm supposed to believe you. You've never given much thought to your own safety before. Why start now?"
"Because I'm scared too," Zeke admitted. "I never really cared about myself before. For so long, the only thing that mattered to me was whatever problem I was trying to solve, and if I had to get hurt in the process of solving it, that was a no-brainer. It never mattered whether I lived or died, only whether or not I got the job done. But now that I'm with Nia, I…"
He paused. It took him a moment to find the words, and then even longer to find the courage to say them.
"For the first time in twenty years, I have something else to live for besides the mission my mom gave me. I have a life that extends beyond the next bout of heroics. And it's a life that I want to keep living. So believe me when I say that I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure this never happens again."
He could tell she didn't quite believe him. And he didn't blame her. His past behavior didn't exactly inspire confidence on that front. But he'd made up his mind about this.
"It's a tall order," Pandoria muttered, taking a moment to dry her eyes. "But… If you've got Nia looking after you, then I can rest a little easier. She seems to have a habit of doing the impossible, so if anyone can get you to be less stubborn, it's her."
"I doubt she's going to let me out of her sight much anyway," Zeke said. "So I'm not sure I'm going to really get the chance to be reckless in the first place."
"Yeah, I guess so."
Pandoria managed a smile, but Zeke could still tell that she wasn't fully convinced. He'd need to think of a way to convince her he'd really made a change.
And a way to convince himself, if he was being honest. It was all well and good to say that he was going to be less reckless, but if he found himself in another situation where he had to choose between his own safety and someone else's, he still wasn't entirely sure how he'd act. He didn't want to keep putting himself in danger, but if the situation arose, he might do it purely on instinct.
"Well, if there's anything I can do to put your mind at ease, then just say the word. I'll do whatever I can to make it happen."
"I appreciate that, but…" Pandoria sighed. "Unless you want to stay cooped up in the Gardens forever, then I'm not sure what you can do."
"I'll think of something," Zeke said, doing his best to reassure her.
"I don't doubt it," Pandoria said. "But being a Caretaker seems inherently dangerous, so… Maybe this isn't a solvable problem. Maybe I just have to get used to this."
"I sure hope not," Zeke said. "I can't imagine spending the rest of my life fighting."
"Really?" Pandoria asked. Then she smiled a genuine smile. "Maybe there is hope for you after all."
"I can hardly believe it myself," Zeke said, slowly getting out of bed. His whole body felt sore, so it took longer than he would have thought.
"How long have I been asleep?" he asked.
"A couple days," Pandoria said. "Vess and I have been keeping an eye on you in shifts, so that Nia can work without constantly fretting over you."
"Damn," Zeke muttered. "Kalarau really did a number on me, huh?"
"Yeah…" Pandoria sighed. "If I ever see that asshole again, I'm going to break his nose."
"That makes two of us," Zeke said, laughing to himself a little. Immediately, pain shot through his side, and he had to fight to keep from doubling over.
"Maybe we should get Nia to take another look at you," Pandoria said, stepping over to support him. His first instinct was to insist that he didn't need any help, but he managed to fight through that and keep his mouth shut.
"Where's Adenine?" Zeke asked as Pandoria led him out of the infirmary. She didn't seem to be here, which was highly unusual for her.
"She's distributing medicine to the refugees," Pandoria said. "A lot of them have never left Leftheria before, so she's making sure no one catches anything nasty."
"How are the refugees doing?" Zeke asked.
"Not great," Pandoria said. "Things could be worse, but losing a Caretaker and having another turn traitor just after they arrived has really put a strain on the community. If things continue in this direction, people might start blaming them for what's happening. And the Praetorians really aren't helping with that either. It feels like everyone's just waiting for them to pull something."
"I was hoping Jibril could keep them in check," Zeke said. "But I guess there's too much bad blood there for one woman to keep a lid on it all."
"Nia's pretty dead set on trying, though," Pandoria said. "Between the two of them, we've managed to avoid a disaster so far, but I'm not sure how long that's going to last."
"Guess that's the first order of business, then," Zeke said.
"I think your first order of business should be getting some rest," Pandoria said.
"Yeah, but if Nia's too busy to dote on me while I'm recovering, then what's even the point?"
"You've really got your heart set on that, huh?"
"I'm dating a healer!" Zeke protested. "I'm dating the healer! The best in the world! What's so wrong with wanting to take advantage of that!?"
"When you phrase it like that?" Pandoria asked. "It doesn't come off great."
"You know that's not what I meant," Zeke said, pouting at her. "And your girlfriend's a healer too, so I don't want to hear it. Can you honestly tell me you wouldn't find it hot if you were injured and had the opportunity to have Kora look after you while you recovered?"
Pandoria thought about it for a moment.
"Point taken," she decided. "But I'm not sure how much good you're going to be able to do in your condition."
"If all we're doing is keeping the peace, then I don't need to be in top form for that," Zeke said. "Just gotta stand around looking intimidating. Maybe talk some people down. That sort of thing."
"Going to be hard to do when you can't even stand on your own," Pandoria noted.
"Yes, well, hopefully Nia can help with that," Zeke said.
"What happened to getting pampered?" Pandoria asked.
"Therein lies the rub," Zeke said. "I can't have my girlfriend dote on me until we've resolved this business, but in order to do that, I'm going to need her to fix me up, thus removing the pretext for said doting in the first place. Quite the conundrum."
"I'm sure you'll figure something out," Pandoria said.
The two of them made it to the courtyard, where Strix had apparently been busy making modifications to the outer wall. Before, it had mostly been there to provide the Gardens cover from the occasional sandstorm that swept across Temperantia's back. Now, though, it had been modified with defensive emplacements, and there was a mix of Gardens volunteers, refugees, and monks patrolling its length, watching the wastes beyond for any sign of attackers. Zeke didn't know exactly who they were expecting, but the two likely candidates were Spessia and the Coalition. Zeke couldn't decide which was worse.
Pandoria led him into the middle of the courtyard before easing him down onto one of the benches. Then she stepped forward and waved her arms, getting the attention of Rex and his group of defenders, who were all clustered atop the gate. Slowly, he made his way down the new constructions, followed by Nal and…
Corinne?
That didn't seem right. But there was no mistaking it. Rex's aunt was one of the refugees standing guard on the wall, and she'd come armed to the teeth. She had a pair of revolvers jammed into her waistband, a shotgun in her hands, and what looked like a sniper rifle strapped to her back.
"Zeke," Rex said, giving him a small nod as he approached. "Glad to see you're up."
"You doing any better?" Zeke asked.
"No," Rex said. "I can't sit still for too long or I start to lose it. But Nia says that Atasaiah's probably going to come to us. So until that happens, there's no point rushing off and doing something stupid again."
"Speaking of," Pandoria said. "I thought she'd be here. Have you seen her?"
"She and the new guy had some business to take care of," Rex said.
"New guy?" Zeke asked.
"Corvin," Pandoria said. "He's stepping up to help handle some of the responsibilities, now that we're down three Caretakers."
"They made Corvin a Caretaker?"
"No. Apparently, he refused an official position. But Nia seems to think he's come around."
"I'll believe it when I see it," Nal muttered.
"He's been rather helpful, all things considered," Corinne said. "I should think that counts for something."
"I'm inclined to agree with Nal," Zeke said. "He's the one who staged the uprising against us. I'm not sure I buy a sudden change of heart."
"Apparently he was acting under orders," Pandoria said. "You'll have to ask Nia for all the details, but she seems to trust him, so I'm willing to give him a chance." Then she turned to Rex. "Do you know where they went?"
"Toward the amphitheater," Rex said, motioning in more-or-less the correct direction.
"Great," Pandoria muttered. "Another hearing's just about the last thing we need right now."
"I don't know," Zeke said. "It might do some good, at least on our side of things. I doubt it'll convince the monks of much, though."
"I guess we should get going, then," Pandoria said. "Thanks for the directions."
She bent down to help Zeke to his feet, but he brushed her off.
"All this walking is starting to get to me," he said. "Give me another minute."
"Man, Kalarau really messed you up," Rex said.
"Speak for yourself," Zeke said. "Didn't he shove you down a giant hole?"
"Eh." Rex shrugged. "I only broke one arm. You look like you've been chewed up and shat out by a feris."
"Language!" Corinne shouted, reaching over to smack Rex on the shoulder. Zeke did his best to stifle a laugh.
"Oh, come on!" Rex protested. "Don't we have bigger problems to worry about?"
"Not at the moment we don't," Corinne said.
"Listen to yer auntie," Nal said, wagging a finger at Rex. "She knows best."
"Do I?" Corinne asked, shooting a sideways glance at Nal. "This is news to me. I seem to recall you were rather insistent that I was wrong to go back to Leftheria. Wrong to raise a family. Something change your mind?"
"Yeah, well, if I'd known that freakin' brat would grow up to be the Aegis Driver, maybe I would've stuck around a bit longer."
"Wait…" Zeke looked between the two of them. "Do you two know each other?"
"Apparently so," Rex said, sighing. "This was a real hell of a way to learn I have a second aunt."
"You're married!?" Zeke shouted.
"Nah, it ain't like that," Nal said, immediately brushing him off. "But Corinne and I go way back, so there's no way in hell I'm passin' up on the opportunity to be 'Auntie Nal' to the freakin' Aegis Driver."
"I am not calling you that," Rex muttered.
Zeke looked at Corinne, expecting her to clarify the situation, but she made a face at him. Apparently this wasn't a topic she was very comfortable discussing.
"Nal and I fought together for a while," Corinne said. "I was a… Different person, back then. I don't really like to dwell on it."
"I do!" Nal said, immediately stepping forward to volunteer information. "We met fightin' the empress. I could tell right away that most of the idiots in Brionac weren't worth a lick of salt, but Corinne was different. She had fire in her. So I bailed 'em out and decided to join up. Even ran with Corinne as Driver and Blade for a while there, until everythin' went to shit."
"Language," Corinne muttered, smacking Nal lightly on the shoulder.
"You were in Brionac?" Zeke asked, staring at Corinne in disbelief.
"Like I said, I was a different person," she said. "And Brionac was a different organization. Or, at least I wanted to think it was different. Maybe I was just fooling myself the whole time."
"Sorry, I…" Zeke trailed off. "I didn't mean to bring up anything painful."
"Don't trouble yourself, dear," Corinne said. "It was a lifetime ago. I've had a long time to grieve what might have been. And if I hadn't left, I never would have started a family. Or taken Rex in."
"Brionac was just a means to an end anyway," Nal said. "Corinne wanted to tear down the empress, and I wanted somethin' to put between me and the assholes on my tail. Neither of us were really in it for any of that 'glory of Mor Ardain's past' crap."
"Language," Corinne said, but Nal either didn't notice or decided to ignore her.
"I'm having a hard time picturing you as a revolutionary, Corinne," Pandoria said.
"Well, I have put on a few pounds since then," Corinne said. "So I doubt I look the part anymore."
"That's not what I meant. I've met my share of revolutionaries, and they all had so much fire in them. That fervor that compels them to take up arms against the whole world. But you're…" Pandoria gestured vaguely at Corinne. "You're not like that."
"Believe me, she used to be," Nal said. "She was fierier than anyone else. That fire was what kept our band of assholes together for as long as it did."
"Language," Corinne said again, shaking her head. Nal just rolled her eyes. "If you want to act like my children's aunt, then you need to watch what you say. I don't need such a negative influence around them."
"Whatever," Nal muttered.
"What changed?" Zeke asked. "If you used to be such a firebrand, then what made you retire to Leftheria?"
"I…" Corinne sighed. "Walraig and I started Brionac because we wanted to change things. Initially, we wanted Mor Ardain to own up to how it had wronged us, but the more battles we fought, the more I realized that wouldn't solve the problem. The whole system needed an overhaul. In order to change Mor Ardain, we'd need to change the world. But Walraig was too stupid and narrow-minded to recognize the real problem.
"So I left, taking Nal and a handful of others with me. We kept up the fight as best we could, but before long, I realized I was pregnant with Mark, and I wasn't about to put a child in danger like that. So I decided to lay low in my old hometown. And that's when I realized that the world I was fighting to make already existed, right there in Fonsett. I just had to slow down enough to be able to see it. And after I had Mark, I had a family to look after. So rather than go back and continue the fight, I chose to remain in Fonsett and watch over it. Guard that small slice of heaven I'd managed to find."
"Is that enough?" Zeke asked. "You don't ever feel like you're giving up or letting anyone down?"
"I used to," Corinne said. "But not anymore. Fonsett is my home, and Mark and Rex and the other children are my family. They're always going to be my first responsibility."
Zeke nodded at that. It was a sensible perspective. But he was hoping for something a little more revelatory. Something that might help him make sense of his own feelings on the matter.
"And besides, it's not like the fight's over and done," Corinne said. "Nal's still out here fighting the good fight. And so is Rex. And so are all of you. The world is what we make of it, and you all are making it better. I'm just trying to do that in my own way."
"Yeah…" Zeke nodded again. "I guess so."
"I get the feeling this isn't really about me," Corinne noted.
"No," Zeke admitted. "It isn't. But that's my problem to deal with, not yours."
"Well, if you ever need more advice, you know where to find me," Corinne said. "Any friend of Rex's is always a welcome visitor. And I have a feeling I'll be sticking around here for a while."
"Hopefully not," Rex said. "I don't think I'll be able to stay sane if things go on like this for much longer."
"Just gotta take yer mind off things," Nal said. "How 'bout some trainin' to liven things up? Ya' were lookin' a little rusty back in Leftheria, but I can fix that up right quick."
"Do not start roughing up my kids, Nal," Corinne said, glaring at the woman.
"Better me than some Sthenosi goon!" Nal insisted.
"Maybe," Rex said. "It'd certainly beat just sitting around waiting." He turned to Zeke and Pandoria. "You two want in?"
"Nah," Zeke said. "I'm still feeling it from the last fight. We're going to go find Nia and see if she can't do something about that. Maybe later, though. Apparently I'm getting a little lax as well. Can't have Kalarau getting the best of me like that a second time."
"That's the spirit!" Nal said, wrapping an arm around Rex. "Let's hit the field and see what yer made of, kid!"
"See you around," Rex said, waving at Zeke as he and Nal headed off. Zeke sat for another moment before standing up and leaning back on Pandoria for support.
"We should be off too," Pandoria said. "It was good to see you again, Corinne."
"Say hello to your father for me, would you?" Corinne asked. "Tell him to come around sometime for dinner."
"Will do," Zeke said.
"And quit being so hard on yourself," Corinne said, shooting Zeke a momentary "concerned mom" look. "There's no shame in slowing down. You've already done more for the world than anyone could possibly ask of you."
"If only that were true," Zeke said, sighing. Then he flashed her his best smile, and he and Pandoria started off to find Nia.
He had a bad habit of trying to take on the whole world by himself. Trying to change everything with his own two hands. Even if he knew it was impossible, he was still going to try anyway, because the only way to guarantee nothing got better was to give up on trying. But after talking to Corinne, he was starting to think that there might be more than one way to go about that.
Corinne was the only person Zeke knew who felt like she wasn't just stumbling her way blindly from one day to the next. She had things figured out. She was content. Nobody else looked at life the way she did. And Zeke had always assumed that was because her life was simple. She was a normal person, unlike him, so of course she didn't have to deal with all the constant tumult that he found himself immersed in. He had assumed that being displaced from her home would have shaken that simplicity. Shaken her outlook on life somehow.
But it hadn't. She was still as calm and content as ever, even in the face of this crisis. And Zeke knew why, now. It wasn't the simplicity of her life that anchored her, it was her own determination. She knew what was important to her, and she made sure to protect it.
But more than that, she didn't feel the need to choose. To her, looking after her family and fighting to change the world were one and the same. She didn't feel guilty or selfish because of it. She didn't feel that it distracted from her purpose. She was confident that it was the right thing to do, knowing full well what she gave up on doing in order to make it happen.
And if Corinne could do it, then so could he. She was living proof that he could put himself and his future first without abandoning his purpose. Because, at the end of the day, he and the people he loved were a part of the world, too, and it would be worse off without them. So if he was trying to make the world a better place, then he needed to keep being a part of it. If that meant putting himself first and taking less risks, then so be it. He'd deal with the consequences of that as they came.
And he wouldn't have to deal with them alone. He had Nia and Pandoria and everyone else to help him keep things from progressing to that point again. So long as everyone kept working toward the same goal, to make the world a better place, then there wasn't anything for him to worry about.
The hearing hadn't been Nia's first idea. Getting Blades and Praetorium monks in the same room to talk their problems out wasn't exactly a level playing field. The Praetorium had subjugated their people for centuries. That was an intense and traumatic cultural memory that Blades had managed to hold onto, collectively, despite the Praetorium's efforts to ensure they couldn't develop a culture at all.
And on the Praetorium side, they didn't even see Blades as people. Worse still, they saw people like Nia as abominations. Affronts to the Architect himself. What reason did they have to abandon that now? Nia barely even believed that Jibril had managed it, and the rest of the monks didn't have a Blade Eater for a Driver to help speed things along.
Despite all of that, though, it was somehow not the worst hearing they'd ever had. A big part of that was the fact that Corvin wasn't constantly stirring up problems. In fact, he was here doing exactly the opposite, trying to help mediate with those more vocally opposed to the Praetorians' continued stay in the Gardens. And Jibril ran a tight ship, so there wasn't much disorder from the Praetorians either.
Still, a smooth hearing didn't necessarily make for a productive one. If indeed this was the kind of problem a hearing could solve in the first place. But if there was a better idea, she didn't have it. And everything else she'd tried hadn't born fruit, so this was what they were left with. All she could do was hope, at this point.
She certainly knew better than to pray.
"This place is founded on our fundamental dignity," Agate said, speaking on behalf of a lot of the anti-Praetorian group. "Everyone is equal. They deserve respect by virtue of their existence. If you can't abide by that, then I don't see why you should be allowed to stay."
"The Architect teaches that all men are created equal in His image," Jibril said. "They are afforded dignity by virtue of His grace, and we have no right to infringe upon that dignity. I believe our two principles are much aligned in that respect."
"The difference is we actually put it into practice," Agate said. "The Praetorium treated Blades as property for centuries. And I get that the rest of the world hasn't done much better, but you systematized it. You created and enforced the dominant power structure across all of Alrest on the basis that Blades and humans were not and could never be equal. How am I supposed to believe that's changed?"
"This is… Difficult to answer," Jibril admitted. "I have no adequate response that would not sound hollow. I recognize that Praetor Amalthus took many actions contrary to the Architect's teachings. But the separate roles given to Blades and humans is one of our most profoundly held beliefs. I believe that it is possible to adhere to the natural roles ordained by the Architect without infringing on any person's inherent dignity."
"Bullshit!" someone else in the crowd shouted. Other people in the crowd began to jeer, and Corvin stepped forward, putting out his hands to try to calm them down.
"If we can, let's keep this civil," he said.
"Civil?" Agate asked, turning to him. "I don't think that's really a fair thing to ask, after what she just said. The idea that Blades are naturally ordained to subservience is just… Frankly, I'm a little appalled we're entertaining this kind of rhetoric, even in a forum like this."
"I recognize that this is where our ideologies differ," Jibril said. "But I can promise you two things. Firstly, my personal beliefs will not impact how I interact with members of your community. We are your guests, and it would be a grave sin to disrespect your hospitality. Secondly, we do not live in an era that conducts itself well to what is natural. In many ways, the natural world no longer exists. It is written that at the end of days, the old world will pass away and a new kingdom will arise, bringing both man and Blade into a new covenant. It may now be time for such a new covenant to arise, and in doing so, the Architect need not be bound to His previous declarations. Until His will is made clear, I think it prudent that we suspend the current covenant and pray for a new revelation. If I have erred in this decision, I will throw myself on His mercy."
"I get that you've found a way to reconcile your screwed-up worldview with the fact that you need our help," Agate said. "I'm not entirely convinced, but you've been true to your word, so whatever. I'm more worried about your 'children'. Because not all of them seem to share your theological opinions."
Agate looked past Jibril at the handful of monks who'd come with her. Higher-ups in the order who held sway over the initiates. The ones most likely to inherit Jibril's position if she were to be ousted. And therefore, the ones most likely to find a reason to cause trouble.
"I am the Mother Superior," Jibril said. "My Children know that I act in their best interests. I do not believe that any of them would disobey my orders, even if they disagree with my conclusions."
"I wouldn't be so sure," Nia said, stepping forward. Nominally, she was supposed to be a neutral party for this hearing. Present to keep the discussion civil and mediate disputes, since Tenax was refusing to take up the position herself anymore. But she still had her own agenda. She wanted to head off potential problems before they got out of control, and that meant identifying who in the Children of Humility was intentionally provoking conflict.
"Several of your monks have had unprovoked altercations with our citizens," she continued. "Mostly verbal, but there have been a couple of physical ones as well. If we don't address this quickly, it's going to get out of hand. You promised me that you'd guarantee their good behavior, but that plainly hasn't been the case."
"I apologize for my Children's brashness," Jibril said. "They have recently lost many siblings. It has been hard on us all. But rest assured that I will be meting out the appropriate punishments against the offenders. This will not happen again."
"I don't see how we can take you at your word," Agate said. "You already promised this wouldn't happen, and yet here we are."
"What else would you have me do?" Jibril asked. "If there is more you would require of me, then name it. I will comply to the best of my ability."
"Perhaps you could let us enact our own punishments?" Corvin suggested. "After all, we are the aggrieved party in this instance."
"I…" Jibril went quiet for a moment. The look on her face suggested that doing so would violate some sort of monastic law or stricture. She took her time to formulate a response, but before she could give it, another monk cried out.
"Enough of this farce!" he shouted, stepping forward.
"Brother Pnaddio," Jibril said, putting a hand on his shoulder. "I would advise you not show such disrespect to our hosts."
"While they disrespect you!?" Pnaddio called out. "While they disrespect the Architect Himself!? No, Mother Superior, I can bear no more of these insults!"
He shrugged out of her grasp and stepped forward, pointing a finger accusatorily at Nia. Finally, she had at least one culprit out in the open. Now to figure out how to deal with him in a way that wouldn't cause more problems.
"The Mother Superior may have granted you clemency, Cannibal, but I have not forgotten what you are! Your existence is a stain on the Architect Himself! You overturn the natural order upon which His covenant is founded! You spit on His laws and delight in breaking His oaths! But instead of stamping out this heretic in the name of the Architect, we entreat her aid! Far have we strayed from His light, if we find ourselves in such misery!"
"And what other choice do you have?" Nia asked, stepping forward to meet the monk head-on. "Spessia, Sthenos, Duthract, the Coalition… All of them want you dead. If you reject our help, you won't make it ten peds past our borders."
"Even so, we are servants of the Architect. His mercy will sustain us."
"It already has," Jibril said. "It was by His mercy that we have found shelter with those we once considered our enemies."
"I refuse to believe that!" Pnaddio spat. "The Architect would never stoop to using creatures such as these!"
"You really aren't helping your case," Nia noted. "If you won't abide by our laws and respect us as equals, then I won't be able to stop them from kicking you out."
"Your laws hold no sway here, heretic! Not in the face of the power of the Architect Himself!"
"Very well then," Nia said. She drew her sword and stepped forward, aiming it at Pnaddio's chest. "If that's the case, then let's put it to the test. If the Architect is so powerful, then with his help, you should have no trouble striking me down."
"With pleasure!" Pnaddio drew the spear from his back and brandished it toward Nia. But the moment he stepped onto the stage, she shot forward and, with a single swing, split his weapon clean in half. Then she kicked his legs out from beneath him and threw him to the ground, keeping the edge of her sword pressed against his throat.
Immediately, Jibril manifested her fans and stepped forward, prepared to intercede on the monk's behalf. The rest of her group did the same, and Strix and Corvin brought out their own weapons in response. For a moment, the two sides stared at each other, but neither broke the tension.
"I suppose the Architect wants me alive after all," Nia said. "What a shame."
"Caretaker," Jibril said, an edge creeping into her voice. "I would advise you let Brother Pnaddio go."
"I will," Nia said. "But he needs to understand something, first. I don't enjoy fighting. I'm not a killer, at least not anymore. I try to see the best in people, to the point where I'm willing to give people like you more chances than you probably deserve. But I am not without my limits. If you endanger the people of the Gardens in any way, I will not hesitate to stop you, by whatever means necessary. At the moment, we are going to do everything we can to keep you all safe. But that only lasts so long as you treat us with the respect and dignity we're due. If you continue to test the limits of our hospitality, you will eventually find them."
Nia stood up and lifted the sword from Pnaddio's neck. Immediately, he scrambled back, terrified and angry in equal measure. But she couldn't really bring herself to feel sorry for him. He didn't even consider her a person. To him, she was an animal. And she had half a mind to kick him out of the Gardens just for that.
But they were supposed to be better than that. So she was going to give them all a second chance.
"You offer no hospitality!" Pnaddio spat. "Just threats and heresy! You are sinners, all, and one day the Architect will punish you for your transgressions."
"Why don't you leave, then?" Zeke asked, leaning on Pandoria as he hobbled into the amphitheater. "You clearly don't want to be here, so leave. No one's stopping you. And honestly, I think we'd all rather you weren't here. So why are you?"
"Mother Superior Jibril has chosen to lead us to this place," Pnaddio said. "I have no right to question her decision."
"From where I'm standing, it looks like you already have," Zeke said. "You've disobeyed her wishes to avoid starting further conflict, and in so doing you've made her a liar. Hardly behavior befitting a Child of Humility."
"And what would you know of our ways, heretic?"
"Oh, that one's easy." Zeke took his arm off Pandoria and straightened up, exposing the Core Crystal on his chest. "Because I am a Child of Humility. I joined up after Praetor Amalthus put this in my chest."
That took Nia by surprise. She knew he'd worked for the Praetorium in the past, but she didn't think he'd gone so far as to join a monastic order.
Confused, the other monks looked to Jibril, and she sighed.
"He speaks true," she said. "I supervised his initiation myself. In secret, as to avoid a public scandal."
"This cannot be," Pnaddio said. "This heretic was a product of the Praetor's efforts?"
"It is so," Jibril said. "If these people are heretics, Brother Pnaddio, then so are we. We have no right to judge them. And if, in light of that, you still refuse to heed my commands, then you are not fit to serve in your position."
The threat of excommunication—or whatever it was Jibril would do to remove him from his position—seemed to take the fight out of him. And the revelation that Zeke had been altered by the Praetorium seemed to give a few of the other monks pause. Which was more than Nia had expected. People like them tended to have an infinite capacity to twist reality to fit their preconceptions. But at least a few of them must have been genuine believers.
"I apologize on behalf of my wayward Child," Jibril said, bowing to Nia. "And I thank you for showing mercy, despite the provocations you have suffered. It is an example we should all strive to follow. Rest assured, I will take the appropriate measures to ensure this does not happen again, but if there are other conditions you would deem appropriate, then I welcome you to name them."
"I'm not sure I'm happy about this," Agate said, glancing at Nia disapprovingly. "But I can think of a few measures that might suffice. What about everyone else? I think all of us have been talking long enough, so let's get some other voices in here."
Others from the Gardens began to chime in with their thoughts, and Nia took the opportunity to step back and run over to Zeke. This was an important hearing, but the way he was walking worried her, so right now looking after him was more important.
"Hey," Zeke said, smiling at her and she ran up to him.
"You're awake," she noted. "Took you long enough."
"Sorry about that," Zeke said. "Usually, I'm much quicker on the draw."
"Not always," Nia said, letting a mischievous smile creep onto her face. "You're certainly capable of taking your time when it counts."
It took Zeke a moment to pick up on her meaning, and he blushed a little, despite himself.
"Gross," Pandoria muttered, shaking her head at the two of them. "I did not need to hear that."
"How's your leg doing?" Nia asked, moving the conversation along for Pandoria's sake.
"Not great," Zeke said. "And it's more than just the leg. My whole body's been protesting since I woke up. I was actually hoping you could take a look at it, if you have the time."
"Oh, I'd love to take a look at that body of yours," Nia said, doing her best to sound seductive. It wasn't her best line, admittedly, and she really didn't have much practice, but her point came across well enough that she managed to elicit another groan from Pandoria, so she considered that a win.
She motioned for Zeke to sit down on the edge of the stage and began spreading water over him. His muscles were extremely tense, so she got to work relaxing them first. She'd find the underlying cause after that was done.
"How've you been holding up?" Zeke asked. "I know this kind of political nonsense isn't your forte, but I would have figured Dromarch would be around to assist here."
"He's busy helping the refugees stay afloat," Nia said. "We've got enough problems to worry about as-is, so he's keeping the day-to-day running smooth to give me the time to focus on this." She motioned around at the crowd. "It's not been easy, but I'm managing."
"Are you?" Zeke asked. "Because you just attacked a guy in front of all his mates. I doubt that made us any friends."
"No, but the point isn't to make friends," Nia said. "These people don't think of us as their equals, and arguing with them or trying to convince them otherwise won't get us anywhere. So I thought I'd try speaking in a language he would understand. Make him realize that even if he doesn't think of us as equals, what he thinks doesn't matter."
"Well, you're right that talking probably won't get us anywhere," Zeke said. "But I'm not so sure about a show of force either. It might only cause further resentment."
"Maybe," Nia said. "But I'm not trying to fix the Praetorium, here. As far as I'm concerned, it's beyond saving. What we need is to keep the peace. And if that means letting them know we're not going to take their provocations lying down, then so be it. At least it'll make them think twice before they start more trouble."
"If that's the case, then I don't think we have a responsibility to keep looking after them," he said. "We probably shouldn't be sheltering people who want to do us harm."
"No, probably not," Nia said. "Ultimately, it's the community's decision, so if they want to kick the Praetorians out, then so be it. But I don't like the idea of leaving them to die. Even if they're scum, I still… That's not the kind of person I want to be."
"I can't argue with you there," Zeke said.
"What about you?" Nia asked. "You seem to have a pretty low opinion of the Praetorium for someone who used to be a monk."
"I have a low opinion of them precisely because I used to work for them," Zeke said.
"Emphasis on the 'used to'," Pandoria said. "Zeke gave up on the monastic life after six weeks."
"I could've kept at it just fine," Zeke insisted. "I memorized all the garbage they threw at me. I kept to their stupid schedule. I could've been the best damn monk in the business, but I chose to quit."
"Why were you a monk in the first place?" Nia asked.
"I took it up on a whim during my recovery," he said. "It was a novel curiosity, at first. But it didn't suit me at all. Too many arbitrary rules. Not enough action. So the moment I was back to full strength, I quit the monastic life and took up a more freelance position."
"And yet, you still worked for them for a while," Nia noted.
"Yeah…" Zeke sighed. "It seemed like a good idea at the time. We went after Blade hunters and Shieldwall and the like, so it was easy to think we were doing the right thing. But in retrospect, I was just helping Amalthus enforce his monopoly on Blade distribution. Still, it wasn't all bad. If I hadn't joined the Praetorium, I wouldn't have met you."
"Well, I suppose Amalthus did one thing right, then," Nia said.
"Alright, well, it seems like Zeke's in good hands," Pandoria said. "So I'm going to just leave you two to do… Whatever it is you're going to do. See you."
With a hasty wave, she ducked out of the amphitheater, leaving the two of them sitting on the edge of the stage while the hearing continued behind them.
"Where's she going?" Nia asked.
"No idea," Zeke said. "This is the first time I've seen her like this, honestly. Usually, she's more than eager to poke fun at my relationships."
"Maybe we're too sincere for her," Nia mused. "She can't find anything to make fun of, and it's throwing her off her game."
"Well, you're certainly the first person I've dated who's earned the Pandoria seal of approval." Zeke shook his head. "But I think the real reason is probably less amusing."
"How so?"
"My latest brush with death really upset her. More than these things usually do, which is saying something. She's scared about what might happen if I run off and get killed, and I think she might be starting to resent me a bit for how little regard I have for my own safety."
"She's not the only one," Nia said.
"Yeah…" Zeke sighed. "I figured that was the case. I'm sorry for putting you through that."
"You should be sorry for putting yourself through that, you idiot," Nia muttered. "You're the one who keeps getting hurt."
"It's not like I plan these things!" Zeke protested. "I just—Listen, I'm not trying to argue. I agree. Both you and Pandy have every right to be angry at me for how I've been acting. And I know I've had my excuses in the past, but from now on, no more. I'm not going to keep putting myself at risk chasing after some childish fantasy. From now on, this—" He motioned between the two of them. "—is my number one priority."
"Well." Nia smiled, draping her arms around his neck and pulling him in closer. "You certainly know how to make a girl feel special."
"Maybe not in front of the crowd," Zeke muttered.
"Who cares what they think?" Nia asked. "It's not like people don't already know."
"I know, I just…" He took a moment to find the words. "I love you, moments like this feel special to me. I'd rather not have a bunch of strangers intruding on that."
"Fine," Nia said, pulling back from Zeke a little. She didn't really see what the big deal was, but if it mattered to him, then she'd respect it. "I suppose it might be bad form to start snogging in front of the people I just threatened with bodily harm. Might give off the wrong impression."
"There's that too," Zeke said. "Speaking of which, any luck getting me back in top form? There's not much I can do to help with the Praetorians if I can't at least act intimidating."
"You sure you want me to fix you up that quickly?" Nia asked. "I would've thought you'd rather take the opportunity to have Nurse Nia's full and undivided attention."
"The thought had certainly crossed my mind," Zeke admitted. "But I hardly think I'm going to get your undivided attention with all the problems currently battering down our door. So as enticing as that sounds, I think I'd rather be in a position to help solve some of those problems."
"Well, I suppose you're in luck then," Nia said, withdrawing her water back into her dress. "Because there doesn't seem to be much for me to fix. I would have expected your muscle strain to have healed itself with a few days' rest. Now, obviously that didn't happen, but there's not really a reason why. Nothing's wrong with you physically. The only thing I can think of is that you haven't been getting enough rest."
"I just spent the last few days unconscious," Zeke noted.
"Must've been a rather fitful sleep, then," Nia said.
"Either that, or I've just gotten too used to falling asleep next to you," Zeke said. "It's unreasonable to ask me to go back to sleeping on my own."
"Well," Nia said, a grin creeping across her face again. "That I can fix. As your nurse, I'm prescribing you one night of the best sex of your life."
"Don't doctors usually write prescriptions?" Zeke asked. "Not nurses?"
"That depends," Nia said. "Do you want to keep being a pedant, or do you want to have some fun tonight?"
"Oh, that's a tough one," Zeke said, tapping his chin in mock deliberation. "Decisions, decisions."
"Alright, Shellhead. While you make up your mind, I'm going to go close things out here."
She stood, leaving him sitting on the edge of the stage, and walked back over to Corvin. He took a few steps away, leaving Strix in charge, though it didn't seem like there was much need for moderation at the moment. Things had returned to being relatively civil.
"That was a hell of a gamble," he muttered.
"Here's hoping it pays off," Nia said.
"It'll certainly have some kind of an effect," Corvin said. "But long-term, I think we need to do something more fundamental. They don't value people who aren't human, and a show of force like that is only make the bigotry quieter. It doesn't solve the underlying problem."
"I doubt that's something we can solve," Nia said. "Unless we find a way to get them to see us as humans, I doubt we're going to get anywhere."
"Don't you mean see us as people?" Corvin asked.
"Not really. We make that distinction, but they don't. To them, those categories are one and the same, so if we want them to stop treating us as lesser, we need them to see us as fundamentally human."
"I'm not sure how many Blades would be comfortable with that," Corvin noted.
"I know." Nia sighed. "Like I said, it's not something we can solve, at least in the immediate. For now, I'll take whatever gets us through the week."
"Sure." Corvin shrugged. "Can't argue there, I suppose."
"Speaking of, I'm not sure there's much more good I can do here. Do you think you're good to handle things here with just you and Strix?"
"Planning on running off to make up for lost time with your boyfriend?" Corvin asked, glancing over her shoulder at Zeke.
"And so what if I am, huh?" Nia asked.
"Nothing." He shrugged. "We all need an indulgence, I suppose. I just never took you for that type."
"What type would that be, exactly?"
"Y'know what? Forget I said anything." He took a step back and gave her a small wave. "We'll handle things here. Go have fun."
She shook her head as he walked back to the hearing. Even if he was being more helpful these days, he was still an asshole at heart. That seemed to be a fundamental part of his personality, independent of whatever Bradly had ordered him to do. But still, for the moment, he was an asshole who was willing to help out, and they needed all the help they could get.
"Good news," Zeke said, getting to his feet as she walked back over to him. "I've made up my mind."
"And?" she asked.
"I've decided to choose pedantry," he said, shaking his head. "What good is foreplay if you can't get the details right?"
"At least I'm putting in the effort," Nia said. "I don't see you out here coming up with any ideas."
"I'm kidding!" Zeke shouted, rushing to defend himself. She rolled her eyes at him, and the two of them walked out of the amphitheater together. "I'm kidding. If you're serious about getting more experimental in the bedroom, then I am on board a hundred percent."
"Good," Nia said. "But there's something I owe you first. We never did have that picnic date."
"This day just keeps getting better and better," Zeke said.
"I did promise I'd dote on you, if you remember. Even if you're technically recovered, that's no excuse to break a promise."
"No argument there," Zeke said. "But, as much as I love the idea of having my girlfriend cook me a romantic dinner, I think I'd rather we do this one together."
"Why?" Nia asked. "You got a problem with my cooking?"
"Nothing of the sort. I've just never actually cooked with anyone other than Pandy and my dad. I thought it might be fun to see how we get along together in the kitchen."
"Fine," Nia said. It wasn't exactly what she'd had in mind, but making a meal together did have its own romantic charm. And so long as they were both enjoying themselves, the details didn't strictly matter so much.
The two of them headed back to the Caretakers' quarters to get started on dinner, and it almost caught Nia by surprise how unusual this was. She'd almost never taken time out of her schedule like this before dating Zeke, but now here she was, intentionally putting aside her responsibilities in order to relax. It was something she was entirely unaccustomed to, and yet… It felt completely natural. As if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
She had certainly come a long way in the past few days. She was starting to feel like she'd made a life of her own, instead of spending her time working on behalf of everyone else. It was almost enough to make her forget about all the crises looming on the horizon.
But even so, they could deal with those as they came. Despite all the strain they'd been put under, or perhaps because of it, the Gardens were a resilient community. Things wouldn't immediately collapse if she took an afternoon to herself. So that's what she did. She carved out a small oasis for herself in the midst of all the ongoing chaos. For the moment, that was enough.
Zeke wasn't normally a fan of stark beauty. The majesty of a place in decline or ruin. Some people really went in for that sort of thing, but he always thought it was more depressing than anything else. A cautionary tale. Perhaps a sad and all too common indictment of the state of the world. But never something to admire. It was why he'd never truly taken pride in how Tantal had clung to life, even if he could recognize that to do so required a certain strength and determination. Instead of proud, he just felt angry that they needed to go to such lengths to survive.
Looking out at Temperantia, though, he felt something different. A lot of the landscape was a stark, barren wasteland. The graveyard of every civilization that had vied for domination of Alrest. A living monument to how twisted and broken the old system had been. But amidst all that black, warped landscape, there were patches of green to be found. Grasses and shrubs and even a handful of trees taking root in the rocky, inhospitable soil. After centuries of devastation, life was beginning to recover here. There was hope that the future could be better than the past.
Though, it was also possible that his current circumstances were coloring his perception somewhat. He and Nia were sitting atop a cliff overlooking the Gardens, watching the sun set on the horizon. He had his head in her lap, and she was idly running her fingers through his hair. As far as moments went, it was basically perfect, and he didn't want anything spoiling the mood. So maybe he was just seeing what he wanted to see.
But maybe things really were getting better. It was hard to believe, sometimes, but moments like this were a good reminder that what they were doing had a purpose. They had brought life back to Temperantia. That alone was worth celebrating.
"That was some damn good redfish," Zeke said, patting his stomach. "Probably one of the best I've ever had."
"There's a fine line between flattery and lying, Zeke," Nia said, shaking her head. "There's no way my cooking can hold a candle to Pyra's."
"I never actually had Pyra's cooking, remember?" Zeke asked. "I joined up a bit late in the game for that. Everybody always says she was a wizard in the kitchen or whatever, but I have a hard time believing she was that good. I mean, she spent most of her life locked up in a big tube. How much real kitchen experience can you get like that?"
"Enough, apparently. Believe me, she was in a class all her own. Even Vess's cooking doesn't compare."
"Alright, now you're lying. Vess's dumplings are the best in the world. Nobody's a better cook than her."
"Really? What happened to the 'best redfish you've ever had', then?" Nia asked, a grin creeping across her face as she anticipated his flailing justification. But he'd come prepared for this line of attack.
"I didn't mean that in terms of technical skill," Zeke said. "Sure, you're not the best cook in the world, but neither am I. What matters is that we made it together. The best food is always the food you make with somebody you care about."
"Aw, that's so sweet." Nia leaned down and kissed his forehead. "It almost makes me overlook the fact that you just insulted my cooking skills."
"Hey, you did it first!" Zeke protested. "That makes it fair game!"
"You keep this up, and I might have to ask Pandoria to spill more of those embarrassing stories you never want her to tell."
Zeke immediately sat straight up and turned to Nia, horrified.
"You wouldn't."
"Watch me, Shellhead."
"This is harassment," Zeke said. "This is a violation of my rights. You can't do this to me."
"And what are you going to do about it?" Nia asked, flashing him what he assumed was an inviting grin.
"Well, I can think of a few things," he said, hitting back with his best smoldering gaze. For a moment, as she contemplated the offer, he thought that had worked. But then her grin twisted into a mischievous smirk, and she shook her head.
"Sorry, Shellhead, but no dice. We've already had plenty of sex. Been there, done that, as far as I'm concerned. But embarrassing Zeke stories? Those are once in a lifetime experiences. You're going to need to offer me something better."
Zeke floundered, looking around for an answer, but she seemed to have her heart dead-set on this.
"Fine," he muttered. "But if you must know, then I'll be the one to tell the tale. Pandy never does the good parts justice."
"So you've said," Nia said, settling in with a very self-satisfied grin on her face. "But I think I'll be the judge of that."
"I swear…" Zeke shook his head disapprovingly. He didn't actually care all that much about embarrassing himself in front of Nia, at this point, but it was the principle of the thing. He'd kept up the mystery for so long that it felt wrong to do away with it now.
"It's your own fault, really," Nia said. "You don't get to put on the 'mysterious drifter with a dark past' without making a girl a little curious."
"Aha!" Zeke exclaimed, pointing a finger at Nia accusatorily. "So it worked, then? You found yourself compelled by my mysterious charm?"
"That's not what I said," Nia said, dodging the question.
"Yeah, you did," Zeke said, nodding to himself. "Another win for the Zekeinator."
"I can still go get Pandoria, you know."
"Yeah, yeah." He said, laying his head back down on her lap. She'd had a strong opening gambit, but he'd brought things back around eventually. "Which story did you want to hear first?"
"What's the deal behind your name?" she asked. "Seems like a pretty far stretch from 'Ozychlyrus'."
"Not as much as you might think," Zeke said. "The explanation might take some time, though. Goes all the way back to my grandad's days on the throne. Y'see, old man Kataramenos liked to surround himself with warriors. I dunno if it was for protection against the Praetorium, or if it just made him feel important, but he had a pretty large regiment of mercenary Drivers in his employ. One of those Drivers was—"
The noise of thrusters cut Zeke off just as he got going, and he sat up to see Azazel hovering in front of them. It took Zeke a moment to remember that he wasn't with Spessia anymore.
"Caretaker Nia," Azazel said, bowing his head slightly. "I was told I might find you up here."
"And who spilled the beans on that, exactly?" Nia asked.
"I'm sorry, am I…" He looked between her and Zeke for a moment, frowning slightly. "Am I interrupting something? I'm usually better at reading human social cues than this, but I guess the last few days have got me pretty shaken up."
"The romantic picnic didn't clue you in?" Zeke asked.
"Ah, I see." Azazel nodded. "Shemyaza's the one who really goes in for that sort of thing. I'm afraid I've never paid it much mind."
"Did you need something?" Nia asked. "I don't mean to be rude, but neither of us are really on the clock right now, so if it can wait until tomorrow, then I'd prefer we talk then."
"Unfortunately, no." Azazel sighed, floating closer until he perched himself on the cliff edge. "The Watchers are having trouble settling in. I think a lot of them want to keep moving, get further away from the Coalition, but I'm scared that'll only make us easier targets."
"Since when did the rest of the Watchers get here?" Zeke asked.
"Yesterday," Nia said. "Azurda and Nal went to go recruit allies, and they came back with the Watchers and a promise from Duthract that they'd keep their eyes peeled for trouble. Tora and Poppi are here, too, though they've spent most of their time working on some project they brought with them."
"Allies might be a strong word," Azazel said. "We don't know if we're sticking around for a commitment like that. Fighting the Coalition is a tall order, especially since we came here to get away from fighting."
"We all did," Nia said, clearly disappointed she had to be doing work on her off hours. Zeke felt so immensely proud of her in that moment. "But if they come for us, they won't care about our preferences. We need to be ready to defend ourselves."
"Where do you personally stand?" Zeke asked. "You seemed more than happy to trade blows back in Spessia. Having second thoughts?"
"No," Azazel said. "I'll do whatever it takes to keep my family safe. If that means fighting the Coalition, then so be it. But I'm not delusional. I know how slim our chances are against an opponent like that."
"You'd stand more of a chance if you stuck with us," Zeke noted. "Safety in numbers."
"I've been trying to convince the others of exactly that. If we don't stand and fight here, the Coalition will just hunt us down later. Even if our odds aren't great, this place still gives us the best shot at survival. But a lot of them don't think we'll ever truly be safe unless we get away from humans entirely."
"There normally aren't very many humans in the Gardens," Zeke said. "Present circumstances notwithstanding, our number of permanent human residents never really gets above a dozen."
"Yeah, in a technical sense, but…" Azazel sighed. "We haven't really had much cause to differentiate between humans and Blades."
"You're technically all Blades, too. Doesn't that make you human, by your own definition?"
"We're not Blades. That's a label humans applied to us because they wanted to categorize us and fit us into their worldview. But we're not like Poppi or Lila. We don't have Drivers, we don't generate weapons, we don't do any of the things that make Blades unique in human society. The only similarity we share is our innate ability to do harm, which is not a quality most of us want to emphasize."
"Everyone has the innate ability to do harm," Nia said. "That seems like a poor quality to decide where to draw the line. And it doesn't really explain why you think of us as humans."
"It's hard to articulate, when you've already got your own pre-conceived notions of which differences separate humans and Blades. I'm sure you have your reasons for them. I'm sure some of those differences are of vital importance. But to us, the only thing that stands out is that humans and Blades both form the same sorts of societies. You both engage in acts of warfare and destruction that we'd probably be better off without."
"We're trying to do the exact opposite, here in the Gardens."
"And yet you've posted a small army of armed guards along your walls. As much as you've tried to avoid it, war is inevitable."
"Only because everyone else keeps bringing conflicts here," Nia said.
"Alright, fine. Maybe it isn't your fault, precisely. But you've still decided to engage with human society on their terms. You've decided that war is an acceptable price to pay in order to maintain your position. And a lot of the Watchers aren't comfortable participating in a system that inherently violent."
"You're willing to fight to defend your family," Zeke said. "Seems to me like it's a price you're willing to pay as well."
"Only to defend them. But if isolating ourselves can help avoid that bloodshed in the first place, then I'd much rather take that option."
"I don't think there's anywhere you can go where they won't find you eventually."
"Maybe not," Azazel said. "Maybe that means we're human too, whether we want to be or not."
"Would that honestly be so bad?" Nia asked. "You aren't the only ones who think humans and Blades are fundamentally similar. We are, in a lot of ways, but you seem to have only latched onto the one that lets you pretend you're any different. But there's a lot you have in common with us, too. We both have families we want to protect, for instance."
"I don't mean to be rude, Caretaker, but you're a Flesh Eater. I wouldn't think you'd have much family to speak of."
"It's true that I didn't used to. I had a Driver, and he had a family, but I only ever called them family out of convenience. It wasn't something I ever really wanted for myself. But now?" She looked back at Zeke. "I have a real family. Dromarch and Zeke and everyone else… They're the most important people in the world to me. In that respect, the two of us are practically identical."
"I suppose that's only natural," Azazel said. "Humans made us. Of course we'd end up inheriting some of their proclivities. But a lot of us aren't willing to keep going down the path of our creators."
"The Nopon made you," Zeke said. "Not humans."
"Again, we don't really see much of a difference. They might be different species, but they occupy the same social order. And there's a fundamental quality that they extend to each other that isn't granted to the likes of us."
"I won't argue with you there," Zeke said. "But the same's true for Blades as well. Most humans don't consider Blades people the way they do the Nopon. That's another thing about human society that we're looking to change."
"Do you really think that's possible?" Azazel asked. "Do you really think the humans will ever see us as equals?"
"No idea," Zeke admitted. "But your family doesn't just include you. Even if they're mechanical, Poppi and Lila are very much Blades. They have Drivers, and those Drivers are, by your own definition, 'humans'. If you cut off humans completely, you won't be able to keep your family whole."
"Why do you think we haven't left yet?" Azazel asked. "I came up here hoping you might be able to help us resolve this whole mess, but…" He sighed. For someone who didn't think of himself as human, he certainly emulated a lot of human mannerisms. "I suppose if it were that simple, we wouldn't be having this problem in the first place, huh?"
"No," Nia said. "Nothing's ever that simple. But that doesn't mean we can't find a solution regardless. I'd like to think that's what the Gardens already are. The first step on the road to a better world. A world without warfare and discrimination and all the things you hate about humanity. Because there's a lot of 'humans', Blade or human or Nopon or otherwise, who feel the same way."
"In that case, I've got a question for you," Azazel said. "If you make a world without discrimination, it'd be a world where you, Flesh Eaters and Blades and everybody else lurking on the fringes of human society, are considered fully and fundamentally human. Is that something you really want? Don't you take pride in what makes you different? Are you really willing to throw that away?"
"Being treated equally doesn't mean erasing everything that makes us unique," Nia said. "With the way the Blade system works, I don't think that's really possible, and even if it was, that isn't something I'd want. What I want is a world where we treat people with the same dignity and respect regardless of how different they are. Whether they're a human, Blade, Nopon, Titan, or Watcher."
"Tall order," Azazel noted.
"You don't know the half of it," Nia said. "I doubt there's a way to accomplish that without adopting the view that we're all fundamentally human, and like your family, I know a lot of people who aren't comfortable with that notion. But humanity doesn't recognize people other than themselves, so—"
"That's not strictly true," Zeke said. "They see the Nopon as people. And Nopons and humans are about as different as you can get."
"I suppose," Nia said. "Even so, we're still fighting one hell of an uphill battle. Humanity isn't going to change its mind about Blades overnight. And I don't have a good answer for what to do about your family, either. I would wager your position is even more precarious than ours. But if you want a future where your family can stay whole, without having to hide yourselves away, then I think you owe it to yourselves to stick around and try."
Azazel went quiet for several seconds, then slowly, he nodded his head.
"I suppose that makes sense," he said. "I'm not sure how the others will take it, but… We'll talk it over. At the very least, it's a new idea to consider. That alone should help us reach a consensus more than anything."
"Do let us know before you decide anything drastic, alright?" Zeke asked.
"Of course. We owe you at least that much." Azazel bowed to the two of them. "Thanks for your help. We've got a lot to think about."
With that, he took off into the air, and immediately Zeke laid back down, practically collapsing into Nia's lap.
"Finally," he muttered. "Never thought he'd leave."
"Yeah. But I'm glad we seem to have helped. The Watchers seem like they could use all the help they can get, right now."
"We all could," Zeke said. "Call it a sign of the times."
"I'd rather not," Nia said. "I'd prefer to think that we're moving forward, rather than sliding back into the past."
"Speaking of," Zeke said. "Where'd all that stuff about humanity come from? I thought you didn't even want to be human?"
"Only because I have a responsibility to all the Blades here who aren't comfortable having humans in charge," Nia said. "But it's like you said before, I am human. I spent long enough living as one that, on some level, I do think of myself that way. But I think of myself as a Blade, too. Up until now, I've squared those two ideas by just ignoring the first one. But with all the refugees arriving, and all this trouble with the Praetorians, I've been thinking more about it. And maybe the best way to go about it would just be to admit that I'm both? I'm a human, and I'm also a Blade, and being one doesn't prevent me from being the other. Maybe, if every Blade could live like that, we wouldn't have so much conflict in the world."
"You said it yourself, though. Not every Blade is going to want that. Most would probably reject the idea out of hand."
"Yeah. But still, it's a nice thought, isn't it? Up until now, I had intended to change the world by leaving humanity no other choice. If we could gain support from human institutions, then they would be forced to recognize our equality. And in turn, they'd be forced to change how they organize their social order. I had thought that maybe that would change their perceptions for the better, but that didn't happen. And now I'm afraid that the opposite might come true instead. That humanity's leaders might see us as so inferior to them that they'd take any excuse to 'put us back in our place', as it were."
"Yeah, but it's not like we're just going to let that happen."
"I know," Nia said. "Even if I'm not sure how we're going to get through this, I have full confidence that we will. After all, nobody's managed to stop us before."
"That's the spirit," Zeke said, smiling up at her. "Now, where was I?"
"You were telling me where you got your nickname," Nia said. "Something about your granddad?"
"Oh, yeah." Zeke made a face at her, making a big show of how much he didn't want to be telling this story. But really, he didn't mind so much. At this point, it'd be weirder if she didn't know this stuff, considering.
But before he could really get back into it, a voice crackled over his earpiece.
"Heads up," Strix said. "We've got incoming."
"Come again?" Zeke asked, reluctantly sitting up for the second time this evening. He really hoped there wouldn't be cause for a third.
"Looks like Mòrag's group. They've got wounded. And I don't think they're alone."
That news settled into a pit somewhere in Zeke's stomach, and as he looked at Nia, he could tell she was thinking the same thing.
This was it. They'd decided to push back against the way of the world, and now the world was here to respond in kind. Spessia, or the Coalition, or somebody. It didn't really matter who, at the end of the day. Just that someone had finally decided their way of thinking couldn't be allowed to continue.
If they wanted the Gardens to succeed here, then they needed it to survive. No matter the cost. Which put him in a rather odd position, considering he'd just decided to stop doing things "no matter the cost". But even so. This place was important to Nia. One of the most important things in the world. He had to fight to defend that.
It would be hard going, to do that while also keeping himself safe. But he wasn't going to go back on his word. He said he's stop putting himself in danger, and he meant that. So even as they charged off to war, he felt oddly at ease with himself. He'd already decided what he needed to do, so now all that was left was to go out and do it. There was no room for any other possibility.