This was crazy. She was crazy. She could have just called. Honestly she should have called. Her footsteps halted, but she was already in his building's hallway. She made it this far, she couldn't turn back now. Maybe he wouldn't be home. Then she could at least tell herself she tried to see him.

She lifted her knuckles to rap on the door and hesitated. She heard the low rumble of his voice talking to his mother. Her heart pounded nervously, and her fingers slid the compass pendant across the chain. Lead you to happiness. She let out a breath. Happiness wouldn't just fall in her lap, she had to try.

She swallowed her nerves and knocked lightly. She rocked on her heels a couple times until the deadbolt slid and the doorknob turned. When the door opens she glanced around, for a moment thinking she was so distracted she knocked on the wrong door, but this was Elliot's place.

"Can I help you?" The man asked gruffly, but not necessarily unkind. Who the hell was this.

"Um," she hesitated briefly. "Is Elliot around?" She was suddenly in high school, nervously waiting at the door of the boy she liked's house.

The man looked strangely familiar, but she couldn't place him. His eyes took her in, head to toe, before he smiled. "Nah, just me and Momma tonight." Jesus. It was Elliot's brother.

She stood for a moment, trying not to let her mouth drop open in surprise. All of the sudden a set of frail hands gripped her forearm. "Oh 'Livia, it's been ages."

"Hi Bernie," she spoke warmly, patting the older woman's hand. Suddenly she was being pulled into the apartment, and she didn't even know if Elliot was home yet.

"Well don't stand in the hall dear. Come on in. We just ate, but Randall can warm you up some leftovers if you want."

She sensed Randall behind her, effectively boxing her in between his mother and himself. Where the hell was Elliot? This was not at all how she expected her evening to go. She hadn't thought about she and Elliot might do or talk about, she just wanted to see him. Maybe I just needed to hear your voice. He needed to hear her, and she needed to see him, and now she was being shuffled into the kitchen by his mother and Randall, whom Elliot had only mentioned by name once or twice. Over the course of twenty five years.

"I'm fine Bernie, really," she tried. But the old woman wouldn't have any of that.

"No no. Sit. Elliot will be here soon," she insisted.

So he wasn't there. Wonderful.

Randall obediently stuffed a plate of pasta in the microwave before leaning against the counter in her direction and shot what she was sure was his most charming smile. "Randall Stabler," he said while sticking his hand out.

She assumed as much, and returned the handshake. "Olivia Benson." She watched a light of recognition flash in his eyes before his smile broadened.

"Olivia," he said slowly. "I believe I've heard that name a time or two." His eyes twinkled with a sort of flirtatious energy.

Good Lord. The last thing she needed was Elliot's brother hitting on her. "Probably," she smiled. She glanced around, desperately wanting to find a flirt proof subject. "Is Elliot working?"

The microwave beeped and Randall set the plate in front of her. She glanced around. Now where the hell did Bernie go!?

"Momma!" Randall called, suddenly noting her absence. "One sec," he muttered as he headed down the hallway towards her room.

Olivia felt a cool breeze drift through the kitchen and she knew exactly where Bernie took off too. Leaving the warm plate of food behind, she made her way to the small patio garden. On her way out she snagged a throw off the back of the couch, knowing that wandering Bernie didn't usually think about silly things like coats.

As expected Bernie was tinkering around the garden grumbling about the dead plants, and how Elliot never watered them. Her arms wrapped around herself and she shivered a little while continuing her mumbling tirade about the state of the garden.

Olivia lifted the blanket to Bernie's shoulders, and she spun around, startled. "Olivia dear. You scared me." A confused sort of furrow crossed her brow. "When did you get here? I don't think Elliot's home yet, but you can wait for him if you'd like."

Olivia wrapped an arm around her shoulders, and gently guided her back into the apartment. "I've been here for a few minutes."

"Oh well, then you should eat."

"Randall warmed up some food for me," she smiled kindly. "I'll stay and eat if you join me."

Bernie waved her hand like it was nothing. "Of course, of course I'll sit." Bernie linked her arm through Olivia's. "I need to hear more about that little boy of yours." Her blue eyes shined, and Olivia felt honored that even a small piece of this woman's failing mind remembered her son. "He's got the sweetest smile I've ever seen."

Randall shut the door to what Olivia thought was Elliot's room. "Outside again?" He asked as Olivia helped his mother into one of the chairs. She grabbed her plate and sat next to Bernie.

"We were just checking out the garden," Olivia smiled at Bernie who kept her hand over Olivia's.

Randall glanced over the table towards the glass doors. "Doesn't look like much," he muttered too quietly for Bernie to hear. He clapped his hands together and pulled up a chair next to Olivia. "So this is the famous Olivia then?"

She chewed the food in her mouth, and Bernie hopped in before she could say anything.

"Olivia's Elliot's partner." Bernie provided. Randall raised an eyebrow in her direction, likely in response to his mother's use of the present tense. Partner could mean multiple things, and Olivia decided to lean into the ambiguous.

"Partner huh? Thought that ended back when he took off to Europe." He kept his tone light, but Olivia suspected he knew exactly which scab he was picking at.

She purposefully smiled. She could play his game, and she wouldn't give him the satisfaction of…whatever the hell he was trying to accomplish. "Old habits die hard."

He might not be her partner in the traditional meaning of the word, but she knew without a doubt, he would always have her back. Time to move the chess piece. "Can't say I've heard much about you," she glanced purposefully at Bernie. She hoped he caught the implication that even his own mother didn't talk about him, at least not to Olivia.

He chuckled and leaned back in his chair. "Well some of us didn't knock up our girlfriend and become a saintly cop. Some of us had to find other ways to make a livin," he winked.

"Randall!" His mother scolded, smacking his arm.

"Sorry Momma." He didn't seem sorry.

She wanted to gag, but kept her sickly sweet smile instead. No wonder Elliot never brought his brother up. Guy was a total tool.

She shrugged and reached for her glass of water. She took a drink before saying, "Well, not everyone has what it takes for this type of work," she said coolly before taking another sip of water. God, she wished it was wine.

He grinned at her jab. He was clearly enjoying the banter. She flicked her hair over her shoulder, turning away so she could talk to Bernie easier.

"Noah's taking a painting class," Olivia rubbed a thumb over Bernie's wrinkled hand.

Her eyes lit up, "Oh really?" She began to gush. "He's going to be great at it. That boy of yours, he's something special Liv."

"I know," she said while flicking through pictures until she found the right one. She slid the phone over to Bernie so she could see the picture.

She lifted the phone closer to her face, and her hand dropped over her heart. "Look at that? Oh I knew hee love watercolor. He's a natural."

She handed the phone back to Olivia, but Randall pushed in again. "May I?" He said, eyeing her phone.

"Uh yeah. Of course." She awkwardly handed him the phone and he assessed the picture.

"Beautiful boy," he complemented. She watched as he pinched the screen to zoom in. "Looks like you. 'Cept the eyes. Must be his daddy's eyes."

She knew what he was implying, and she needed to shut that down. Hard. "No-" her phone rang, effectively cutting off her explanation.

Fin.

She lifted her phone to her ear, and slid the chair back. She'd left the precinct an hour ago. He wouldn't call her back unless it was important.

"Fin," she said into the phone.

"Sorry Liv. I wanted to let you have an evening, but we got another Fed here, and she wants to talk to you. Not anyone else." He sounded agitated.

She breathed a sigh of relief. At least it would get her out of the awkward as hell situation she found herself in. "I'll be about a half hour." Fin hopped off the call and she reached for Bernie's hand. "I gotta go back in. Sorry I couldn't stay longer."

Bernie brushed off her apology with a wave of her hand. "Go to work dear. It isn't the first time."

She gave Bernie's hand a quick squeeze. "I'll stop in again soon," she promised.

Bernie squeezed her hand back and leaned her head towards the door. "Better get out of here before they call you again."

"I'll walk you out," Randall offered.

She shrugged her coat back on. "I'm not parked far. Thank you though."

He wouldn't be brushed off. "Let me at least walk you out." His hand hovered near her lower back, and she resisted the urge to roll her eyes.

"Okay." She forced a smile. "That would be okay."

"Be right back Momma," he kissed her head and she waved him away.

Olivia already entered the hall when Randall fell in step next to her. She could feel the heat of his hand invading her bubble. "Momma likes you."

"I like her too." It was probably the most genuine thing she had said to the man all night.

"I'm surprised though. I mean she really loved my ex-wife, but Kathy was obviously her favorite. Probably because she was married to Elliot…I'm just surprised she took to you so easily…Maybe she just loves anyone Elliot brings home."

His words sounded salacious, and she was getting tired of the bullshit. She flipped around just as they got to the door. "If you want to ask me something just ask," she snapped. "Want to know if I'm sleeping with your brother? I'm not. Want to know if my kid is his? He's not. Did I miss anything?"

His amused smile made her want to punch him in the face. "Nah. That's all I needed."

"Great," she grumbled. Randall held the door open for her and she quickly stepped out.

"Can't wait to see you again," he called out.

She continued to walk, not interested in turning back or giving him a response. The man was annoying, and infuriating, and not in the same way Elliot was. When she finally made it to her car, she leaned her head against the steering wheel for a moment. She really hoped Randall would return to wherever he came from before she swing by again.