Disclaimer: I don't own Fire Emblem Awakening, all rights to the owners.
This chapter is coming from someone with no personal experience with this condition. I don't have it myself and I don't know anyone else who has professed to have it… at least from what I know. I've done research, but this is still little more than an educated guess (and I use the term educated very loosely, research on the internet only goes so far).
Needless to say this is a bit of a touchy subject for some people, so I'm reluctant to post this chapter. However you all seem to want it (judging by how you've all ignored how I said this chapter was already finished and tried to give suggestions on how to write it), so I'm posting this anyways.
This was suggested by Scorin. Here's to hoping I did this right.
Robin didn't like the council. Despite Emmeryn claiming it to be a place of 'calm conversation', the truth was that council meetings often devolved into shouting matches between the members as each tried to push their own agenda. The representatives of the dukes (as the dukes themselves couldn't stay in Ylisstol all year and only showed up for important meetings) never spoke truthfully, and Robin hates liars.
The white-haired girl was horrible at reading people. She could barely tell the emotions of others as is, and the councilmembers were almost unreadable due to masking what emotion they had. The men usually feign calm, and even when they usually show anger it's a lie to seem more powerful or try to sway others. The women are even worse, as they show one emotion when feeling another, and speak in lies, exaggerations, and half-truths even more than the men do.
Basically Robin hated the people in the council just as much as she hated attending the council itself. The only person the tactician could be sure was being truthful was Chrom, as the prince made little to no attempt to mask his thoughts and feelings. Emmeryn or Frederick often have to hold him back from yelling at some councilmember for their stupidity.
Robin always sits next to Chrom when she attends council. He doesn't question when she pulls up her hood to block out the noise when people start to argue. It's not that she can't deal with it, she's been on the battlefield and can deal with noise when she has to, but if she has the choice Robin would prefer not to hear people shout at each other especially when it's because of their own refusal to consider the needs of others.
When the arguing inevitably started,Robin wouldn't just pull up her hood, she would also slowly rock back and forth as a way to relieve her tension. Something about the loud noise put her on edge and the movement helped alleviate the need to do something, anything.
"Gods above." Robin murmurs, glaring from beneath her hood at the stupid man who insisted his duchy was somehow more deserving of extra funds than all the others. Her grip on the sides of her hood tightens. "Why must so many people with power be stupid?"
"You tell me." Chrom murmurs back, his face sporting a similar glare. "Thank Naga Emmeryn is in charge of the realm and not one of these people."
Both of them can feel the disapproving gaze of Frederick, but the knight has no words to refute them and stays quiet.
"When is break?" Robin asks, allowing herself to start rocking a bit.
"Half an hour." Chrom grunts. "You fine?"
"Managing."
"Hmm…" The blue-haired boy reassuringly puts a hand on her shoulder. Robin grits her teeth and stays quiet. She doesn't want to push him away by admitting that his touch puts her even more on edge.
Touch isn't as bad as it used to be, back when they first met a simple touch on her arm made her mind scream at her that she was in danger, now it's just a feeling of immense caution like watching a wasp circle your head.
That being said, Robin would prefer touch be limited to situations when she's not already anxious. Her own calm (unfortunately) has to be valued over Chrom's good intentions.
"Chrom."
"Yes?"
"Could you remove your hand?" She asks softly. "You're making it worse."
"Ah." He instantly pulls away, wincing. "Sorry."
"It's fine. Focus on council." The girl says curtly.
Council starts to go long as Emmeryn tries, and fails, to calm down the councilmembers. Eventually Robin just stands up and leaves, she wants to keep her schedule and it's clear no headway will be made for now.
She supposes there's no reason to hurry, it's not like a late break will change anything, but Robin appreciates order and familiarity. If no headway will be made, why not leave and take the extra time to calm down?
Food for break is already out, and Robin walks to the same seat she always takes. It's telling that, out of all the seats in the room, this is the only spot where a plate lies ready. Robin gets the same thing every time, so the servants have taken to just leaving a plate of food at her usual seat.
Now that is good customer service.
###
"Bah, I don't have time for this!" The representative from Baldor snaps. He straightens his fancy vest, twirls on his heel, and struts away from the tactician. Robin scowls at the man's retreating back and, when no one's looking, sticks up her middle finger at him.
"I can see your talk went well." Chrom says, falling into step next to her as they leave the castle. "Clearly he was receptive to your advice."
"Is that sarcasm?" Robin asks. While she's been getting better at recognizing them, the tactician still has a hard time with jokes and sarcasm. It's just an extension of her being awful at reading people.
"Yes, yes it is." He chuckles.
"Hmm…" Robin frowns. "It looked like he just got angry out of nowhere though. Did I do something?"
"He was annoyed since you started talking to him." Chrom admits, smirking. "I think he knew you were right and just didn't want to hear it."
The tactician's frown deepens. "So he just left? That's childish."
"I suppose it is." Chrom agrees.
The two of them walk down the castle stairs (all one-hundred and seven of them, Robin counted) and over to the west a few minutes. The Shepherd's barracks is only a few minutes away, and soon the pair are walking through the clean stone exterior into the rather messy interior. The ground is littered with papers, boxes and barrels lie unstacked, unlabeled, and with no sign that anyone is actually moving them to the storage room.
"Of course the one day Emmet and Frederick are busy, no one else bothers to do their jobs." Chrom sighs, picks up some papers. and starts looking through them. "Hmm… inventory updates, financial reports, and I think these are some of your new maps." He hands her a few of the thicker, slightly yellowed sheets.
"These shouldn't be on the ground." Robin frowns. She carefully rolls up the maps and locates the protective wooden tubes they came in. "Someone even took them out and didn't put them back." She says anxiously. Robin doesn't like things being messy, she feels like she has to fix it before she can relax.
"That sounds like Vaike to me." The prince murmurs, and stoops low to grab some other papers. "Let's start with the papers, those are easily damaged. Hopefully 'Teach' didn't ruin any."
The two quickly set about collecting the stray parchment. A few more maps and sleeves are found (thankfully whole an unharmed) and the reports are all put into one pile. Chrom puts the papers in the office and Robin moves the maps to the strategy room, and they meet back in entry room.
"Should we get someone else?" Robin asks, testing the weight of one of the crates. It'll take both of them to lift most of these. "I don't doubt we can do it ourselves, but I'm supposed to muck out the stables later and I don't want my back aching going into that. Cleaning the stables is bad enough as is…"
"The way I see it, if we do Vaike's job for him, he'll be so grateful that he'll take your chores for the rest of the day." Chrom says.
The tactician tilts her head. "I kinda doubt that…"
The blue-haired man barks a laugh. "I mean since Vaike failed to do his job, if we do this I'll make him clean out the stables instead of you."
"Oh."
"And that would leave both our afternoons free I think." Chrom says with a smile. "Right?"
"Yes, unless you have some other work I don't know about." Robin blinks, not seeing where this is going.
"So if neither of us are busy after this, what would you say to joining me for dinner?" Chrom offers coyly.
Robin blinks. Why would he offer that? The food at the barracks is perfectly fine. Sully isn't cooking tonight, so there's no need to evacuate. "Um…"
"I know a place that serves delicious Valmese food not to far away." Chrom continues, keeping up his smile.
"He must be referring to a 'restaurant'." Robin thinks, her brows furrowing. Restaurants were something unique to Ylisse. Most of the upper class in all countries had personal chefs, and as such there was no need to go somewhere else to eat. In Ylisse however (or at least Ylisstol), these strange things called 'restaurants' were popular among the high class and rich merchants. They served foreign delicacies at high prices, but knew how to prepare the dishes far better than a house chef due to practice and experience. "I suppose I could come along. Why though? Did the dinner schedule change? Is Sully cooking tonight instead of Stahl?"
"No, no." Chrom coughs, his large grin falling into a small nervous smile (at least Robin thinks his expression is one of nervousness. Again, she is awful at reading people). "I uh… I want to treat my friend, and I know you're not a fan of the big outings so I figured just me and you might be more acceptable."
Friend huh. Robin didn't think merely being his friend warranted being treated to dinner. That sounded more like something you'd do for…
"Oh…." The tactician murmurs, eyes widening. "You're courting me, aren't you?"
The boy immediately looks away and coughs into his fist. "Well, erm…"
"Chrom. You know I can't work with subtleties." Robin says bluntly. "Tell me."
The blue-haired prince takes a deep breath, flushing red. "Y-Yes Robin, I am."
"Okay then." She murmurs. "Is that why your face is red?"
"Yes!" He huffs, turning away. "Usually people don't get called out the first time they make a move."
"So I did something wrong…?" Robin asks.
"Well no, it's just not what I expected." Chrom admits. "Anyways, if that's cleared up we should get to work. These boxes won't move and label themselves."
"Right, right."
###
Chrom has chosen a nice place: a small, less frequented location that was devoid of the loud, pompous nobles that sometimes visited more popular restaurants.
Robin hated those sort of people. Unlike the councilmen they didn't lie, but they seemed to forget that politeness was a thing that you needed even when you were of high class yourself. This place, however, was nice and quiet. The decoration wasn't overly gaudy or distracting, and the clientele was similarly low-key being mostly merchants and some of the lesser elite.
The tactician expects everyone to fawn over Chrom the same way those at court tried to suck up to him, but is surprised when the servant ('waitress' Chrom corrects) greets Chrom with familiarity and bows politely to Robin before showing them to a table.
Dinner is as good as Chrom said it would be. Knowing this is a date Robin steers away from talking about the council meetings, and instead focuses on asking Chrom about himself. Some things he tells her she already knows (like that he tends to break stuff when training, be that wooden swords or straw dummies) but other things are new. She didn't know, for example, that Frederick had made posters of him and attached them to the inside of the Shepherds' tents. Apparently Robin had been asleep while the entire thing happened.
"Hold up…" Robin says, holding back a smirk. "That picture wouldn't happen to be you, naked, holding a scale would it?"
"Yes." Chrom says, face immediately turning apprehensive. "How do you know that…?"
The girl doesn't bother to hide her grin this time. She saw one is Sumia's room, maybe the girl got it before Chrom could tear it down. "I saw one somewhere."
"Where?!" The prince says urgently, and Robin laughs.
"Sumia has one." The tactician admits.
"S-Sumia?" Chrom stammers. "Gods, I can't just ask if she has it, that would be awkward."
"Just let the girl have her poster." Robin laughs. "Just think, some day ten years in the future she'll bring that thing out and you'll have a good laugh about it."
"Maybe everyone else will..." The prince grumbles, pouting.
Unfortunately Robin doesn't remember her past, so most of the evening is just her asking Chrom questions. It's still pleasant though, and certainly an evening well spent in Robin's opinion.
###
Changing natural reactions is hard, but possible. Miriel told Robin in no uncertain terms that yes, her touch aversion could be mitigated. There was no guarantee it would go away completely, but she could certainly reduce that anxiety that came along with it.
The process wasn't fun though. According to Miriel the only real way to get used to something was to do it, and do it frequently. Eventually your mind would adapt, realizing that there was no danger, and the anxiety would lessen.
Robin was thankful for Chrom's patience in this. He found it a bit bizarre when she started to ask if she could hold his hand all the time, but the prince followed along without complaint. At first it sucked. It was like holding a slug or something, not in the sense that Chrom was slimy but in the sense that she had the same get the hell away from me feeling.
It took a few months before Robin started to feel mildly comfortable with Chrom (and only Chrom. Everyone else is still a no-go). During that time Risen outbreaks started to become more frequent, and Robin found herself constantly on the move chasing the more dangerous packs with the Shepherds.
She hated how it ruined her schedule. Robin couldn't have her lunch at exactly noon anymore, as engagements or the need to get somewhere quickly made daily plans a complete toss up. It was annoying not to be certain of anything, but it was also her job (with a bit of help from Emmet) to try and keep some semblance of order as they moved around. Knowing she was doing something to solve the chaos helped calm her nerves a bit.
It was almost ironic. Her tactics and strategies were only useful amidst times of chaos, the times she hated the most. To be fair most people hated times of chaos, so perhaps Robin wasn't special there. She just got more worked up than others.
Robin often found herself hiding in Chrom's tent. Thanks to Frederick's attention to detail the prince's tent always looked the same, and if there was something Robin liked it was consistency. It was almost calming to stay there, and if Chrom wasn't using his fold-up desk she would often commandeer it rather than move to the strategy tent or her own tent.
"You know there's a bigger table in the strategy tent, right?" Lissa says, peeking into her brother's tent. "Seriously Robin, it's gotten to the point people are starting to look here first and the strategy tent second."
Robin huffs, and dunks her quill in ink to recoat it. "I know, but I like it here. What is it this time?"
"Emmet wanted to give you a report." Lissa sighs, walking over and dropping a single sheet of parchment on the desk. "Something about weapons you ordered."
"Ah, the javelins." The tactician murmurs, picking up and reading. "Good, right on time. Do you know if Emmet distributed them to-"
"Go ask yourself." Lissa groans, rolling her eyes. "Seriously, stop living in my brother's tent. That's how bad rumors are made ya know?"
As Lissa ducks out, Robin reluctantly picks herself up and leaves as well. Maybe the princess has a point.
###
Everyone joked that the only reason Robin proposed to him was just so that she had an excuse to hide in his tent. It was all in good humor of course (even if Robin did, in fact, use that very excuse).
Chrom still thought Robin was a bit strange. She gets anxious easily, was even worse than him at discerning lies, and has a hard time reading emotions.
Then again, calling Robin 'strange' was a bit unfair considering the Shepherds were well-known for their eccentricities. Perhaps among the upper class of Ylisstol she stood out, but among the Shepherds she could be argued to be the most normal. She didn't consistently lose her weapons and call herself by a nickname, she didn't have a crippling fear of women, and she wasn't secretly a thousand year old dragon.
Maybe it was just because Chrom spent so much time around her that, to him at least, she stood out even more than everyone else.
"Chrom, seriously, stop." Robin says, her hands falling firmly on his shoulders. "The reports can wait. You're too tired, you've been staring at the same lines for five minutes."
The prince sighs, admitting defeat. The sky outside was dark, and he'd spent the entire day doing paperwork already. His wife was right, he should sleep. His mind was wandering to her too much to think about the reports.
Chrom stands up, blows out the candle, and slides into his bedroll. He's surprised a moment later when Robin nudges him to the side a bit and slides in with him. Chrom can barely make out her shape in the darkness as she wraps her arms around him and pulls herself tightly against him.
"What happened to the 'no sharing beds' rule?" Chrom laughs quietly, but returns the hug.
"Hush." Robin mumbles sleepily. "We're married. Special case."
And to think, once upon a time, she would flinch at his touch. Chrom could never be more thankful of all those times she forced herself to hold his hand despite her discomfort so she could get used to physical contact. It would have pained him if he couldn't kiss his own wife.
I think this chapter turned out okay. I hope my portrayal of autism wasn't too off. Honestly, about half way through I kinda stopped thinking about this Robin as 'autistic' and just started to consider her as someone who's hyper-sensitive to touch, hates loud noises, and likes routines. A few quirks were dropped in the making of this due to their complexity or just how poorly they fit into the story.
Needless to say this is a massive over-simplification of autism, but I honestly don't think I can cram all the little details into a story this short.
Kamencolin: I'm gonna have to say no to that. Crossovers make things complicated very quickly, and something like that deserves a multi-part story that I can't give right now.
Guest: Both noted, I love those ideas!
ScorinVoidseeker: Oh don't worry, I was waiting on you to review before I updated. I know you tend to review every chapter, so I wait for either you to review or a full week before updating (assuming my chapter is finished of course).
Good to know it was well-received. It went completely off-track from what I expected, so I wasn't sure how good it would be.
I thought that too, though I also think I could have just paired M!Robin with Virion and it would have worked just as well. Virion is just a really good support for either Robin.
I hadn't considered Sully, I tend to forget about her.
Thanks for the help (though the next chapter has M!Robin romance,and it's already written, so expect it within a day or two after this update! We'll see how I did).
And I look forward to your first story. Best of luck.