Disclaimer: I don't own Fire Emblem Awakening, all rights to the owners.
Minor: Dark Flier, Immortal, Exploitive, Swordmaster, Tripping, Perpetual Cheer, Chef, Blacksmith, Pegasus Knight, Teacher, Librarian, Masochist, Literal-Minded, Authoritative, Phobia, Thicc, Tsundere, Damsel in Distress, Gangrel's Child, Communist, Bomber, Bear Cavalry, Flying, ADHD, Super Strength, Patriotic, Sassy, One Liner, Seamstress, Shephard, Speedy, Cool, Shy, Bookworm, Kung Fu, Buff, Lazy, Wingless Flight, Blunt, Elf, Dwarf, Scottish, Melancholic, Punny, Dark Mage, Dragoon.
Standard: Elemental, Deaf, Nurse/Medic, Valmese Tactician, Medusa, Gift from Validar + Evil to Good, Mimic, Emotionless, Crippling Overspecialization (Idiot Savant), Coward, ESP, PTSD, Magician, Handicapped, Secret Helper, Morpher, Dreamwalker, Twins, Animal Whisperer, Tiki Assistant, Deadly Touch, Mind Reader, Doppelganger, D&D magic, Dominatrix, Songstress, Kinky, Matchmaker, Androphobic, Illusionist, Ring Maker, Teleporting, Crippled, Depressed, Slave, Love Curse, Geokinetic, Trauma, Siren, Changeling, Shapeshifter.
Unlikely: Chrom's child, Minotaur, Paladin, Werewolf, Future Soldier, Bounty Hunter, Weather control, Kleptomaniac, Druid, Steampunk, Shadow Familiar, Magic Augmentation, Lucky, Exile, Piper (Charmer), Gladiator, Witch Doctor, Centaur, Drunk, Punk, Harpy, Revenant, Luck Manipulation, Demon Summoner, Megalomaniac, Kitsune, King of Plegia, Mood Ring, Reverse Aging, Hammerspace, Prostitute, Demon Hunter, Cyborg, Rebellion, Einherjar, Trap, Yandere, Living Weapon, Size Shifter, Queen of Plegia, Gluttonous, Stretchy, Alchemist, Protoss, Spirit Manipulation, Invisible, Plegian Honor Guard, Mecha, Kryptonian, Creator, Orc, Memory Stealing Respawn, Racer, Khan, Misfortune, Vampire Hunter, Imaginary Actualization, Death, Resurrection, Force, Merchant, Background Music, Variable, Civilian, Natural Disaster, Mental Noise Projection, Hidden OP, Summoner, Cyclops, Teleporter, Cryokinetic, Genie, Judge, Intangibility, Fortune Teller, Serial Killer, Magic Fixit, Drakengard Restoration, Ying-Yang, Childhood Friend, Cyberpunk, Chrom's Mother, Obsessed, Berserker, Phase Shift, Gravity Manipulation, Hallucinating, Bladesoul, Zombie, Double Entendre, Shared Body/Two Souls, Cannibal, Violent, Waterbender, Casanova, Cupid, Undertaker, Master Thief, Guard, Faceless, Shadow, Age Control, Cradle Snatcher, Emo, Nun, Courier, Haunted Knight Armor, Egyptian, Sentient Object, Shit Lord, Court Wizard, Naga's sibling, Mad Queen, Artist, Predator, Cheshire Cat, Radio Host, Chimera, Wendigo, Symbiote, Hivemind, Hammerspace, Anna, Mother Nature, Psychopath, Stripper, Painting, Grima Parts, Knightmare, Super, Swimsuit, Bunny Outfit, One Punch, Idol, Chef, Rampage, Housewife, Determination, Vessel of Naga, Instant Expert, Time Travel, Hermit, Alternate Dimension 'Twin', Legendary, Resistance, Memory Regain, Umbra Witch, Naga, Aquatic, Hexblade Warlock, Dragon, Demon of Choice, Demon of Temptation, Affliction, Good Samaritan, Gallant, Rosannite Tactician, Leeroy, Dungeon, Apparition, Unwilling, Wildlife Commander, Consistent Kidnapee, Grenadier, Magic Creature, Alternating Mind Control, Sothis in the Mind, Exalt, Unicorn, Pegasus, Alicorn, Star Lord, Slenderman, Bird Laguz, Junk Dealer, Gate Guardian, Shaman, Ghostbuster, Exorcist, King, Soldier, Bird Wings, Failed Vessel, Of the Corn, Valentian, Harem, Car, Incubus, National Personification, Gravity Magic, Kraken, Zora, Kirby, Moon, Quadruplets, Unnoticed, Inventor, Bastilio's Kid, Treasure Hunter, Future, Mind-Swapping, Criminal, Hunter/Tracker, Biker, Gigantic Sword, Miracle, Medium, Warlord, Greater Good, Acrobat, Mother of Chrom, Soul Stealer, Mid War Memory Loss, Reverse Memory Loss, Sentient Item, Necron, ARMS, Naga's bride, Titan Sinkhole, Squire, Anti-Magic, Tomesmith, Dimensional Traveler, Falchion, Unbreakable Shield, Many Robins, Muscle, Fearful Knight, Narcoleptic, Big Eater, Aversa's Sister/Mother/Daughter, Evelynn, Witch, Frankenstein, Mirage, Stand, Persona, Pyromancer, Toon Force.
Sweet(?) Robin, as suggested by Dragon Tag. Alternative title: Teatime with Walhart
"I'm so glad you could make it, Walhart!" Robin says cheerfully, and claps her hands. "I was oh so concerned the chaos caused by the damage done to the carts would delay you overmuch!"
"The Exalt ordered me to come here, despite my arguments." The former conqueror says. Even sitting, with Robin standing to pour tea, he still towers over her. His neutral expression could be seen as cold and aloof, as it was intended to be back when he ruled. Now it simply serves to hide the discomfort he feels sitting in a small tent wearing full armor while a small woman, his superior no less, pours him tea into a cup he absolutely won't be able to hold in his gauntlets.
"Oh? You did not wish to come?"
"I did not say that. I simply expected that as a prisoner of war I would be assigned the grunt work of dealing with the carts." Walhart says. "I have no particular opposition to this distraction."
"It's not a distraction, it's a vital bonding activity between Shepherds that has been very useful so far." Robin scolds. "Tea time is as important as weapon maintenance or physical fitness!"
Walhart raises an eyebrow, obviously skeptical, but doesn't argue. "As you say, Tactician."
"I hope you like bergamot." Robin says, setting the cup in front of him. "You may want to remove your armor. I would hate to have the tea spill on it, or worse, inside."
"As you wish." Walhart says, and stands. He proceeds to strip out of his armor, and it's not a quick process. While Walhart is no stranger to donning and doffing his armor himself, he is admittedly used to having a servant to aid him with the most difficult aspects of it. Full plate armor was never designed to be put on by oneself, much less Walhart's more complicated armor, but it's a testament to the Valmese great knight armor design being much more simple than the Ylissian one that even with his additions Walhart can do this alone, if not simply.
Perhaps realizing that she asked him to do something rather lengthy, Robin hesitates over her seat, decides not to sit, and comes to help.
If Walhart was uncomfortable before, he's doubly so now. He'd never admit to it, of course, but it feels very wrong for Robin to help him. A servant should be helping, not the army's head tactician.
Robin's own armor is sitting in the corner of the room. Compared to Walhart's heavy full plate, Robin has only a breastplate, greaves, poleyns, cuisses, bracers, and gauntlets, and most of that armor only covers the front side and doesn't go all the way around and it probably takes less than a minute to don because her armor lacks the overlapping and interconnected nature of actual full plate armor. She also relies entirely on her coat to defend her back.
Admittedly that coat has armor plates between the fabric and allowed her to survive a hit from Wolf Berg, so Walhart can't exactly criticize.
"There we go!" Robin claps her hands when all his armor is removed. "Now you're ready for tea!"
"As you say." Walhart says, feeling quite ridiculous at the moment. All this fuss over tea. He, the former conqueror of Valm, has been reduced to playing house with Ylisse's tactician. It doesn't help how vulnerable he feels without his armor. Valm was not a safe place to be. Even without Excellus' scheming, taking over a whole continent inevitably entailed assassination plots against his person. He's used to having a locked door or his armor between himself and anyone else.
But he remains calm, and as dignified as his current state can allow. If he is to be reduced to little more than a doll to entertain the tactician, such is his lot as the loser of a war, and he will accept it without complaint.
Teatime is mostly a silent affair for the first few minutes. Robin seems very pleased with herself as she sips her drink and watches to make sure Walhart is participating.
"So, Walhart." Robin says eventually. "You said that you expected to be given grunt work…?"
"But of course. I am merely the failed ruler of a country foreign to your own." Walhart says. "I am a prisoner of war, even lower than a foreign mercenary or the most novice soldier. What work is more fitting for the worthless than menial labour?"
"You are no prisoner of war." Robin chides him. "You joined us of your own will, did you not?"
"I joined for no more and no less than my beliefs demanded." Walhart states. "I joined as should any who have been defeated owe the victor of their conflict. The weak listen to the strong, and you are strong."
"Hmm, that's the first time I've been called strong." Robin smiles. "Most people choose the term, ah, 'cute'."
"They are fools. You have won a war. You could not be anything but strong." Though Walhart silently admits that Robin absolutely doesn't look the part. She's short, with long pink hair, and from what he saw she mostly heals rather than fights.
Of course, he was defeated for the second time by Robin punching him in the face with a spiked gauntlet, so quite obviously she is more than a healer.
"I can be both." Robin suggests. "Cute and strong."
"I won't pass judgement on appearance. It means little to me."
"Oh? I see." Robin sounds surprised, but she doesn't elaborate. "Do you want a biscuit?"
"I am not opposed."
"That doesn't answer the question, Walhart. I asked if you wanted one."
Walhart sits silently for a moment, then reluctantly admits. "Yes, I do."
She pushes the plate of biscuits towards him, and he takes one.
"Tactician, you claimed this was a vital activity, yes?"
"Indeed." Robin nods. "For bonding."
"For what reason is bonding vital?" Walhart questions. "Bonds do not help you conquer a country, nor fight a difficult foe."
"But they do!" Robin says. "It ensures I have allies willing to help me, and they will fight all the better for their bonds."
Walhart refrains from outright scoffing. "What nonsense."
"If you don't like the emotional look at it, perhaps you'd prefer something more scientific?" Robin asks. "Someone will fight all the more fiercely if their spouse or child is in danger, yes? The same goes for a friend. Such is the value of bonds, along with greater cooperation of course."
"It must be as you say, Tactician. Your bonds defeated my strength. My opinion means little."
"Now now, your opinions matter. We're all equals here." Robin scolds. "I won't hear any self-deprecation from you."
Such an absurd thing to say. "I am not being self-deprecating, as you say." Walhart scoffs. "I am merely stating facts."
"No, you're being depressing and sulky." Robin says. "And I won't hear any more of it."
That is not at all what he was doing.
"Now, be nicer to yourself and have another biscuit." The tactician instructs, and nudges the plate of biscuits towards him again.
Walhart has another biscuit to placate her. This is turning out to be the most ridiculous thing he's done in many years. If you had told him a year ago he'd have been bested by this woman, he would have dismissed the individual in question and scoffed internally. He couldn't afford to make some big show of finding the notion ridiculous. He had to be serious at all times.
At some point during this trivial teatime Walhart spills tea. It was bound to happen; after all, the cup is much too small for his hands, even without his gauntlets on. Before he can even start cleaning himself up, Robin is out of her seat and wiping up the spill with a napkin.
"Tactician." He says firmly, and raises a hand to gently push her aside. "I am not a child incapable of taking care of myself."
"I don't know about that. You often sound like a child who swallowed the soldier's guide to tunnel-vision." Robin tuts, and continues to clean him up anyways.
"You think I am obsessed with strength to a fault?" Walhart says flatly, followed by. "Tactician, cease this nonsense."
"No, now shush." Robin scolds once more.
It has been a very long time since Walhart has suffered such indignity, and certainly the first time he's suffered such a thing where he's been in no position to stop it.
"I do indeed think you are obsessed with strength to a fault." Robin says as she dabs at his face with a cloth. "Strength is all well and good, but a focus on strength alone makes you subject to crippling overspecialization. An army doesn't function if you only have axemen, after all."
Walhart stays quiet as Robin lectures him. This woman is a fool, but a fool who bested him, and so perhaps there is something to learn from her.
"You really need to be more adaptable." Robin continues. "A fixed mindset can be exploited, and only shows an unwillingness to learn, and nothing good has ever come from stagnation."
"As you say." Walhart says calmly. "Tell me, did you learn something from your battle with me?"
"Of course." Robin smiles. "I learned that I need to punch even well-intentioned people in the face sometimes."
Somehow that feels very insulting despite the fact that she acknowledged he was well-intentioned. She's indirectly calling him an idiot who wouldn't listen to reason.
Of course, to him, there was no point in listening until he lost. A correct reason was decided by strength, not rhetoric and logic. Even now, that is his belief. He listens because he lost and not because he was convinced. Rhetoric was a way for the weak to scrape out power and undermine their leaders, and logic a way to try and force their will on their betters.
Clearly that was not the case. The Exalt has powerful rhetoric, and the Tactician has logic, and neither functions alone. Against his strength, they won. They may have struck him off his horse in battle, but it was not because of a better army, or weapons, or armor. It was tactics, alliances, and communication. Things he never put much value in.
"More tea?"
"Please."
This is a very weird chapter. I hope I captured just how awkward the interactions between the two actually are. Awkward for Walhart that is. Robin is having fun.
RedNephilim: Indeed he would.
Dandaman5: :D
Alexi Borodin: I considered making Owain the second major character there rather than Anna, but a story can only handle so much crazy.
Takedo: Yeah. I suppose that's not surprising considering he was based on a fighting game character. They don't tend to adhere to the laws of reality so well.
I decide what the next chapter is based purely on what I feel like doing. There's no system beyond my personal preference. I'll note your ideas down.
Plasma Dragon 312: You might be waiting forever then. Even I don't know what I'll be doing next.
SkyeLight05082002: Noted.
RedBanzai: Noted.