Chapter 368

Elain's hand had remained in his the whole time and, by the time that Lucien was sure he had fixed everything that was causing him pain, he opened his eyes to see her curled against him, her own eyes closed. Listening to her breathing for a few moments, he was pleased to notice that it was slow and easy and normal and far better than it had been in that hallway earlier. Anger flowed through him at the thought of what that bastard had done to her, crushing her throat the way that he had, and rage tinged the ends of that when he thought about what that bastard had intended to do to her.

Lucien knew that he had made whatever had been wrong inside of him worse by doing what he had done, moving as he had and killing those other two, but he hadn't been able to stop himself. The instant he had seen that bastard's hands on Elain he hadn't cared about the pain. Nothing could have stopped him, even if his legs had been broken, Lucien knew that he would have done the same thing. He was getting used to whatever it was inside him that would drive him to do things when Elain was involved. It was the same thing that had taken him by surprise that first time in Rhys' kitchen when Elain had walked in on him that night so long ago. It had driven him to get his hands on her, to life her to that bench and to hold her. He hadn't been prepared for it then, and it had sort of scared him because he didn't know if he would be pushed to do something that would make her want to avoid him, to want him gone. He knew that wouldn't be the case now, and he was more used to those urges he had no control over. He hadn't thought it would drive him to such violence, however. Lucien did not regret it though. Males like that deserved to die, and he would not allow anyone who had hurt Elain like that to walk away unpunished.

A soft sound from Elain then, brought Lucien out of his thoughts and he realised that he'd brought a hand up to his mate's throat. His fingers had been caressing her soft skin gently, and a flush of pleasure moved through him when he saw the pleased smile on her beautiful face. "You like that, Petal?" he asked, and Elain smiled more widely. Her head tipped a little further, exposing her throat to him more easily, and he increased the length of his slow caresses.

"How do you feel?" she asked, and he gave a soft chuckle.

"I'm good as new."

Gorgeous brown eyes opened and something in Lucien relaxed a little further when he met her gaze. "You need to heal yourself when you need it." She breathed and he nodded his head.

"You couldn't breathe…" he said, hand still caressing her throat. "This beautiful throat…" he told her, "That bastard had crushed it…"

"I know…" she replied, "And thank you…" Her hand stroked his knee, "But then you should have healed yourself. Your own breathing wasn't good…"

"We needed to move."

"Lucien…" She sat up and looked at him more closely, "It worries me," she told him, "that one day you'll go around healing everyone else and not yourself, and then…" She shook her head, "I'll lose you."

Blinking, Lucien reached for the bond. He could feel her fear, and knew that it was something she had been holding on to for a while. "You… think that I'll overlook myself … and… die?"

The shaky way that she drew a breath told Lucien that this was exactly what Elain had feared. "… you healed Sheera while walking…"

"My love…" he tightened an arm around Elain's waist, "It's different… healing Sheera cost me next to nothing, and she needed it…" Elain opened her mouth as if to say something but then remained silent. "She had a nasty knock to her head. It took little to no energy for me to fix that. My own injury required significantly more energy and I needed to actually focus on it. I couldn't do that while we were trying to get up here…"

"I understand…" her voice was soft and he could feel that the fear had not disappeared. He stroked her waist gently.

"Will it help, Petal," he began, "if I promise that I will not ever overlook my own needs and risk my own life to heal others…?"

"Yes."

"Alright." He leaned into her, pressing a soft kiss to her cheek, "Then I promise exactly that."

Elain's smile sent tingles through Lucien and he knew that he was the luckiest male in all of Prythian that the Cauldron had chosen him to be Elain's mate. Out of everyone in existence, everyone who was more powerful, more clever, less… damaged… it had chosen him and nobody had ever had better luck than he had. "Thank you." She breathed, lifting a gentle hand to his cheek. "Thank you."