Chapter 375

"Should we go through the garden?"

Lucien turned his head to look at the guard who had spoken. He'd known the two who had come with him by sight, but hadn't spoken to them before. He had learned that their names were Kaii and Siv and they had both been serving as Helion's personal guards for the last few decades. Lucien had decided that he liked both of them after the first group they had come across and both Kaii and Siv had moved swiftly and silently into action. They had dealt with their enemy within a matter of seconds, impressing Lucien with their skill, and then they had moved on without any bravado or ego. Lucien understood why his father had chosen them to be a part of his guard. For the briefest of moments, Lucien had wondered if perhaps Kaii and Siv wouldn't listen to him as they obviously had far more experience with the Palace and with protecting it, but they had listened to him in choosing their directions, and he could tell that he had impressed them in turn with his knowledge of the Palace and its passages that he had committed to memory.

"Might be a good idea." He said, answering the question that Siv had asked, "The door across the other side leads to one of the large corridors that will take us down the east wall."

"There are lots of places to hide along there." Kaii put in. "It'll be easier to avoid notice."

Lucien looked at the two of them, noticing the way that they looked at one another with an understanding that came from working alongside one another for as long as they had. They trusted one another, and that was clear. They turned to look at him then, and it was easy to see that they were willing to trust him too, and Lucien felt a rush of something through him. He wasn't sure if it was thankfulness or relief or even affection, but he was pleased. "Let's do it." He said, and Siv grinned at them as he swung around for the large door to the garden.

Moving after him, Lucien couldn't help a grin of his own. He thought that, when this was over, and their lives settled down to normal, he could see himself spending time with these two. They were about his age and, from what he could tell, they seemed fairly light-hearted and fun. It would be nice, he thought, to have friends of his own, to build that side of his life. It was something that he'd never really had. Not in the Autumn Court, anyway. He'd thought that he'd had it in the Spring Court. He'd had Andras before Feyre had killed him, and he'd thought that he'd had Tamlin. That had all been ruined and lost though. He'd just wanted somewhere he felt that people wanted him. Somewhere he could be himself and he was appreciated for that. Home and family and friends. He had Elain, and for the first time he'd gotten a glimpse of what that kind of life could be like. That had become clearer when they had come here and Helion had claimed him. Home and family he had sorted, and now he would like to get working on the friends aspect.

Glancing at Kaii when the golden-haired faerie fell into step beside him as they moved through the small garden, Lucien lifted an eyebrow. "What's it like to be mated?" Kaii asked and Lucien blinked in surprise.

"Uh…" he let his eyes turn back to the garden, scanning the trees and the bushes around them for any sign that they were not alone in here. He hadn't forgotten the other garden and the bodies that he and Elain had come across before Sheera had found them. "It…" he saw Siv look over his shoulder, clearly listening to his response as well. "It's… actually… the single most wonderful thing that has happened to me." He said, "That might sound cliché but sometimes I find it almost difficult to believe that it did happen to me. I used to feel like someone was going to come and tell me there was a mistake…"

"Oh…" Kaii nodded, "So… it's not… restrictive?"

"What do you mean?"

"You don't feel trapped by it?"

Lucien couldn't help the face he made at those words. "How could I feel trapped by it?"

Kaii raised his hands, shaking his head. "I honestly mean no disrespect to you or Lady Elain," he said, "I just always kind of thought that it seems kind of… scary."

"How?" Lucien asked, not understanding at all. He had always dreamed and hoped that he would be mated. He'd had that garnet necklace he had given Elain made back when he was younger for a reason.

"They say that you lose control of yourself." Kaii murmured softly, and Siv nodded over his shoulder. "That you can't think about anything other than the one you are mated to…"

"Well…" Lucien mused, eyes going back to the surrounding trees, "that is true…"

"How is that not restrictive?" Kaii asked.

"I don't see how loving someone is restrictive…" Lucien said, frowning, "Unless you're taking about wanting to be with others…?"

"I… well…" Kaii shrugged.

"When you love someone like that, when you have a mate… you don't even want anyone else." He told them. "It doesn't feel restrictive. When you want her, and she wants you in return… it feels like the entire world is complete." He grinned a bit, "There is no sense of missing out on anything. It doesn't feel like being trapped… it feels like … home, I suppose. It's perfect." He knew that he sounded soft or smitten, and he thought that Kaii and Siv were going to laugh or dismiss what he had said but they both remained silent for several minutes.

"I guess," Kaii eventually said, nudging Lucien, "that it helps when you are mated to someone as attractive as your mate."

"Ah…" Lucien inclined his head.

"Absolutely," Siv said, turning to grin at them. "She has to be the most stunning creature I have ever seen."

The stirrings of possessive jealousy moved through Lucien but he leashed it. He knew that they didn't mean anything by it, and that they were simply trying to compliment him and Elain and, Lucien knew, she was stunning and any male with eyes, real or otherwise, could see that. "She is…" he agreed.

"I wouldn't mind being mated to someone who looked like that." Kaii agreed, and Siv nodded.

"I'm fairly certain that, once the mating bond snaps into place, you will think that your mate is the single most beautiful thing in existence no matter what they look like." Lucien said, even though he knew he'd thought Elain was lovely before she had even been put into that Cauldron and made Fae.

"I am liking the sound of this more and more." Kaii said, and Lucien smiled at him.