Chapter 17
The moment Elizabeth trespassed over the Gardiner's threshold the children flocked directly to her, asking her every question that came to them, pausing not long enough even to allow her an answer. What a marvelous reprieve from the events of the past few days! It had taken all of Elizabeth's patience up until this point to survive the morning. Lady Catherine had insisted Elizabeth be seen by her ladyship's modiste nearly as soon as they had broken their fast. Once they had arrived, her ladyship glanced briefly across the shop and then promptly insisted upon taking precedence over the other patrons, to the great embarrassment of Elizabeth, who could hardly like being the subject of such speculation. What an introduction to Town, she thought, wondering if she would be introduced to any of the same young ladies at the ball. She had brought with her a ball gown, at her mother's insistence, though Elizabeth knew not what occasion she could have for it in Kent. It's presence in her trunk was merely to appease her mother. Elizabeth could not fault Lady C's understanding; however inconvenient or ill expressed, she was correct, the gown must be replaced. The garment could not but be found wanting when weighed against the fashions of Town, it had been made for country balls, and had no place amongst people of fashion. Her aunt would have shown similar generosity, no matter how differently such sentiments may have been expressed.
Upon entering the carriage, at the conclusion of their appointment, Elizabeth had impressed upon Lady Catherine the urgency of her visit to Jane. Surely, it would benefit neither of them to leave Jane unaware. Her ladyship was unmoved, but Elizabeth was determined. Eventually, she had struck upon that which mattered to her hostess, when she said, "Would it not be better to have Mr. Bingley's future settled quickly. It would surely negate any ideas others might have if an engagement were announced elsewhere. Even someone exceedingly grasping, or quite determined to have their own way, would make fools of themselves by attempting to connect him to someone else."
Finally, her ladyship relented when it became apparent Elizabeth would not abandon her point. Lady Catherine ordered the carriage to an abrupt halt, saying nothing to Elizabeth, and giving the driver new instructions: Miss Bennet was to be left at the Gardiner's address, her Ladyship was to be delivered to make her call, and the carriage would obtain a maid and return to acquire her from the Gardiner's. Lady Catherine did not disclose where she would call, but it hardly signified. At best, Elizabeth would have three quarters of an hour with Jane. Elizabeth felt it to be dreadfully insufficient, but it would have to do.
Elizabeth sighed and looked down on the children, whom, she would ordinarily enthusiastically entertain. She greeted them all warmly but turned nervously to Jane. Mrs. Gardiner, noticing the looks between her nieces, shortly thereafter sent for the nurserymaid. She had not the heart to remove them before they got their fair share of their cousin's attention, but a quarter of an hour would have to do.
Immediately upon their removal, Mrs. Gardiner said, "Do not think I have failed to notice the looks between the two of you. I shan't insist upon your confidence, but I must ask if there is any cause for concern." She glanced over to Jane, and then back to Elizabeth and said, "I know only that for now you are to stay with your cousin's patron, and that your missive has caused Jane a great deal of distress."
Wondering why Jane would have kept the contents from their aunt, she replied, "I thank you; I am well. Pray, forgive my impertinence, but I must beg for some time alone with my sister. I trust you will not find it an affront; your company always has my highest regard."
"She should stay Lizzy. I merely did not trust myself to relay the matter without betraying my feelings. If you are correct, it would hardly be right to keep it from my aunt and uncle. Oh, but it hurts too much to hope! I cannot now know what to wish for, with everything we have both endured."
"Oh, Jane, are you now having doubts about Bingley?"
"No, not at all in regard to my affections, or to his, but at the depth of what one relationship must endure. It is shocking really, if you are sure of what you've said, that they would go to such lengths to separate us!"
"I am sorry to say that I was made certain of every word of it. I, too, am shocked that anyone would find such conduct worthy of boasting."
Their aunt now felt the necessity of intruding upon their conversation, "What, may I ask, has taken place? Pray, nothing untoward has happened, has it?"
Elizabeth looked to Jane, seeking permission, and immediately upon receiving it via a nod, she relayed some version of the events. She fixated her narrative on the conduct of Mr. Darcy and Miss Bingley. She relayed Mr. Bingley's shock last evening, as he was clearly not complicit, and looked wounded upon the discovery. She excluded her confusion as to the nature Mr. Darcy's interest in her, and her own less than admirable achievements, those events could be relayed when these matters were in order. I have no desire to cause Jane concern over my conduct. It would add nothing to their courtship to have her embarrassed on my behalf.
Elizabeth, exasperated by another retelling, finally began to conclude, "You see Jane, it is exactly as I charged them, they wish many things besides his happiness; they wish his increase of wealth and consequence; they wish him to marry a girl who has all the importance of money, great connections, and pride."
Before Jane or Mrs. Gardiner could respond, the butler announced callers. "Colonel Fitzwilliam and Miss Darcy for Miss Elizabeth." Her aunt looked to them both, wondering if they should be turned away. It was Elizabeth who spoke, "I cannot know what to think. Colonel Fitzwilliam seemed to express some displeasure at Mr. Darcy's conduct, though it was veiled with humor. As to Miss Darcy, I know not if she is complicit or if is the arrangement was merely how her older brother wished to dispose of her. I had hoped for some assistance from the colonel, but now I wonder at the timing of their call. We must consider that they may be here to show her superiority as a match, purely to dissuade Jane."
"We must receive them," said Jane flatly, to her aunt. "I would not have them feel as though they are the subject of derision. We cannot know what they mean unless we greet them."
Mrs. Gardiner nodded, her guests were shown in, and Elizabeth introduced them. Their aunt was everything elegant; greeting the guests warmly, she gave her nieces nothing for which to blush. Their aunt was everything their mother was not, in this moment both young ladies were thankful they were in Town. Neither could imagine the humiliation of making Miss Darcy's acquaintance with Mrs. Bennet present.
Noticing both young ladies were seemingly taking the measure of his ward, the colonel attempted to ease them all into conversation. "I suppose I am now to call you Miss Elizabeth." He said smiling, then turning to Jane he continued, "I'm delighted to make your acquaintance Miss Bennet. I have heard much of good of you in Kent."
Jane smiled, her serenity not failing her. Miss Darcy spoke, in awe of her current company, "I am so very glad to meet you, Miss Elizabeth. My brother has written of you frequently. He spoke particularly of your playing. I hope to play so well myself someday." Though intending to go on, she stopped suddenly and blushed. The embarrassment of betraying the contents of her brother's letters—those of an unattached man—made worse by the reaction of her hosts, could only fluster her. She could not help but to notice their collective shock and lacked the knowledge of his behavior in Hertfordshire to correctly attribute the cause.
Before the colonel could interject, Elizabeth spoke to put her at ease, praying no more of that subject would now be revealed. Surely though, if he spoke of me to his sister, he could not have meant anything improper by his attentions to me. She hardly wished to draw her aunt's attention to that matter. "I cannot claim to play very well, though I do enjoy the endeavor."
"Oh, but I am sure it must be better than you suppose for my brother never exaggerates. It's so hard though, is it not, to suppose anyone else might take pleasure in our playing."
"Indeed, I believe we are better able to hear our own mistakes and find it difficult to truly perceive our audience's pleasure." Elizabeth smiled, but behind her expression she was immediately struck at how far her perception strayed from the truth of girl in front of her. This is hardly the proud, disagreeable creature Wickham described. She is nothing like her brother! She could detect no haughtiness and now doubted any could be found. Wickham's words rang in her ears, as did Miss Bingley's and Mr. Darcy's but she found their utterings not at all accurate. She is hardly a paragon of feminine virtue. She must have some talent tucked away, but she can barely accomplish casual talk over tea. The poor girl, to be at the heart of such infamous dealings.
"I think you must be right, but I envy your confidence, you would not allow an error to destroy your pleasure."
"Why should it? Is not music meant to be enjoyed? If my audience cannot enjoy my music because of a missed note, it is a pity for them, but I won't allow to ruin my fun. I can have little in common with those who look to find fault, so why should I value their opinion of me." Elizabeth said, thinking of Miss Darcy's brother. Is her brother's constant fault finding the reason for her reticence? Thinking on their aunt, Elizabeth determined he may not be entirely at fault, such conduct had surely been a part of that family's legacy.
"I see what you mean, and must admire your approach, but I cannot claim it shall lend me confidence. I prefer to play alone, or for family, as I worry too much over what everyone might think." Said Miss Darcy hesitantly, as though she were confessing a crime.
"I think it a great shame when we are defined by those who are least deserving of our admiration."
"Indeed," said Colonel Fitzwilliam with a smile. "I can think of more than one person I care not a wit about, and who could keep their opinion to themselves for all I could be brought to care."
"Whatever do you mean?" asked Georgianna, whose mind went immediately to her own circumstances—those that now defined her—although she knew Miss Elizabeth could not be speaking of anything even approaching that matter. She still wished to understand someone who could so readily dismiss the opinion of others.
Elizabeth did not hesitant, she wished this young woman to never let the critical looks of society destroy her assurance. "Take, for instance an insult at a ball. Shall I define myself by it? If a proud, disagreeable, man was to announce that I were not handsome enough to tempt him, should I feel unworthy? Or believe him a fool and mock him to all of my friends?"
"Who would do such a thing?" said Georgianna with shock. "He must be very ill bred."
Colonel Fitzwilliam caught the look on Jane Bennet's face. It was short lived but lasted long enough to confirm his suspicion: Darcy must have issued the insult. It was sufficiently like him. Giving all of the appearance of good humor, he said, "I can verify the man must be a fool. I would have gladly taken his set."
Elizabeth smiled in acknowledgment but turned immediately to her other guest. "I believe, you make my point for me Miss Darcy. Should a young lady attempt to please someone so disagreeable, or shall she delight in the ridiculous and laugh at him? Why should I care for his good opinion if I am disgusted by his manners?"
"Indeed, his good opinion is hardly worth the earning but I daresay, I could not laugh. I would worry others thought of me what one gentleman spoke." Realizing her error, she quickly said. "I did not mean you of course, no one with sense could think that of you, but for myself I would wonder."
Hoping to help shield the young girl's feelings from such a critical guardian she said, "Not everyone's good opinion is worth the earning. I could not think well of myself if such a man, with such bad manners, found me acceptable. I would think there would have to have been some dreadful mismanagement of my education for him to think us suited. I could hardly then call it a compliment. I think also, that if I changed myself to suit such a man those I love the most might cherish me less."
"Yes, I see what you mean. I wish I could stay and hear more of your opinions. It is nearly a quarter of an hour already." Miss Darcy paused and flushed again. "Pray, I did not mean to press you to invite me to stay. I only meant that I hope to see you again soon. Perhaps when you come to call we may finish our thoughts?" she said hopefully.
Elizabeth hesitated, feeling she would be unwelcome but not knowing how she could politely decline. Miss Darcy, concerned she had extended the invitation improperly or given some offense, said quickly "You will return my call will you not? You would be most welcome."
Jane, to her credit, responded with poise. "We would be delighted to return your call. I have never slighted anyone, and I certain I shall not begin now. It is only that my sister is staying elsewhere and must settle on a time that would be amiable to her hostess."
She glanced hesitantly at Colonel Fitzwilliam, as he must understand her cause for concern, and spoke. "Indeed, assuming it is convenient for my hostess, I believe I may call in four days' time. Pray, forgive the delay. I understand I am to attend a ball in two days and will likely need to accompany the calls on following day."
"You will be most welcome. Of that, I can assure you." said Colonel Fitzwilliam looking her square in the eyes. Good god, he thought, she must be staying with Lady Catherine. Darcy's troubles with come from more then just Bingley.
"I shall very much look forward to it then." Miss Darcy said cheerfully, as they took their leave.
Upon being certain their guests were gone, Elizabeth said, "That was very unexpected! I would not recognize her by the descriptions I received."
"I hardly know what to make of her, but I could scarce be brought to think any ill of her." Said Jane.
"I daresay, I agree. I have never before so favored someone upon first meeting them, especially when I had been so predisposed to dislike them." Said Elizabeth, hoping to resume the conversation they had quit at the arrival of their guests.
As their aunt turned to speak a servant entered to apprise Elizabeth the carriage was ready for her. "Forgive me, I do not wish Lady Catherine to suffer the embarrassment of having no carriage when it's time to end her call."
Her aunt sighed, encouraging her to call as soon as she was able. Jane looked at her longingly but was too considerate to beg her to stay. Elizabeth's discerning eye could easily uncover Jane's need for a confidant, but nothing could be done about it now. Elizabeth looked pleadingly at her aunt but already knew she would be attentive to Jane. "I will call tomorrow if I may, but I expect there is no chance I shall best Mr. Bingley to the door." All three women smiled at the declaration and Elizabeth departed.