Chance for a Better Life

Chapter Four

The next morning the house was full of excitement. Jamie thought it was because they no longer had to worry about Mason. He had no idea what the day was going to be like. He was surprised that the family that he was growing to love over the last month love him back.

Erin, Mary, Joe, and Betty were all up early so they could attend the early church mass and go to the grocery store and a quick trip to the mall to get Jamie's Birthday presents. They were determined to give Jamie a day filled with good memories.

Jamie had nightmares the night before, but as usual he woke himself before anyone else in the house and just got up and read. He was happy that he could sleep in. The day before had been hard and his arm did hurt, but he tried to not focus on bad things. Focusing on good things was getting easier since living with the Reagan's because so many good things have happened.

He was just waiting for everything to change. When his dad went to jail the first time, he'd been told things were going to get better, and all that happened was he and his mom became homeless. Good things didn't last was the only constant in Jamie's life.

Frank, Danny, and Jamie all attended the late service and then Frank took the boys to the gun range. He needed Jamie to understand gun safety like the other kids and decided he could be trusted. He knew Mary wasn't going to be happy with this revelation but knew she would understand and appreciate the safety aspect.

Jamie was surprised. He was more surprised when Danny explained that this was something that he, Joe, and Erin all did on their eight birthdays. Danny explained that it was part of being a Reagan. Danny and Jamie needed this time together and Frank took this step because he knew Jamie trusted him.

When everyone got home Erin, Mary, and Betty were all cooking. Joe and Danny were planning on playing games with Jamie. They didn't want him in the kitchen today. They all agreed Jamie needed to focus on having fun and just being a kid.

"Jamie let's play a game. What do you know how to play?" Joe smiled and showed Jamie to the game cabinet.

"I don't know how to play any of them other than candy land because we played that in school." Jamie hung his head because he thought that Danny and Joe would think he was stupid.

"What do you want to play? We will teach you." Danny said surprising both Joe and Jamie.

"Uno?" Jamie looked between the both of them. Danny grabbed the game and got it set so they could play on the living room floor.

"If we are playing, we can't help in the kitchen. Are you guys sure this is, okay?" Jamie worried.

"Kid, when I was your age, I never wanted to stop playing. It's okay to act your age for once." Danny voiced in an ohmage to his own childhood.

"But it's different for me, you belong here. If I stay, I need to earn my way."

"By doing work around the house? Is that why you are always volunteering to help?" Joe felt bad that he hadn't figured this out sooner.

"Yeah. This is your family. If I don't work, I'll have to leave."

Danny couldn't help it, he just started laughing. Joe was trying to hold it in but wasn't able to.

"Kid, our mom loves you just like she loves us."

Jamie didn't believe what he heard. There wasn't any way that was true. Plus, he still didn't trust Danny. He was still a little scary, and he couldn't figure out why he was being nice to him today.

"Jamie, it's true. We all love you. Even Danny." Joe smiled.

Only one person loved Jamie before and that was his mom. That's why losing her hurt him so badly. He'd had no idea that he'd captured the Reagan family's hearts. Jamie got up from sitting next to Joe and went to Danny. He hadn't been close to him too much but decided to be brave.

"You really love me?" Jamie questioned unsure what Joe said was real.

"Yeah kid. I do love you." Danny smiled, and Jamie surprised him by giving him a hug.

"Jamie why didn't you tell us about your birthday?" Joe wondered. He loved his birthday. They always had fun. Birthdays were special in the Reagan house.

"Because the only one that ever cared about my birthday was my mom and she's gone."

"Kid we care." Danny smiled and picked him up and threw him over his shoulder.

Jamie started laughing. He was having fun.

Danny was beginning to realize what the rest of the family already did, that Jamie belonged with them. He was a Reagan who came to them a different way. His dad pointed out that Jamie helped each one of the kids see that bigger problems existed in the world than their own.

When they announced that the family was going to adopt Jamie, Joe was so happy for them and Jamie. He didn't think Jamie understood what it all meant yet, or wasn't letting himself believe it, but he was happy that Jamie and Danny had finally found their way.

Dinner started and everyone was in a good mood. Jamie had been smiling so much that his face hurt. Danny and Joe had him laughing most of the afternoon.

"Jamie today is about you. We know it's a little late." Betty said after grace.

"Really? Is that why we're having fried chicken and mac and cheese?"

"Yes, and it's why you got to pick dessert. Next year this will happen on the week of your birthday." Frank explained.

"Thank you." Jamie smiled and was trying to hide his excitement. He'd never had a day like this before.

"Your welcome, sweetie." Mary got up and gave him a hug. Seeing him so happy made her heart want to burst.

"The food is so good."

"The food is always this good." Henry laughed.

"I hope I can cook this good someday."

The entire table laughed. None of the kids remotely cared about being able to cook.

"Do you want to be a chef when you grow up?" Mary hoped.

Jamie shook his head no. "I want to help people like my mom, and Frank, and Henry."

"How did your mom help people?" Erin wondered. She couldn't fathom how his mom helped anyone besides him when they were homeless.

"She was a teacher, she helped kids who had a hard time and the kids who did better than the other kids."

Things were starting to make sense to Frank. Jamie's mom lost her job because of her husband and the domestic abuse allegations. The first records in his file it wasn't clear which parent was involved. It explained how Jamie wasn't struggling in school school.

"Your mom sounds cool." Joe patted Jamie's shoulder.

The rest of dinner the conversation is lighter. They wanted today to be nothing but happy memories.

When it's time for desert everyone's laughing at something Danny said that they don't immediately notice that Jamie has started collecting the dinner plates and is taking them to the kitchen.

"Kid." Danny yells from the door. "The birthday boy doesn't work on his day."

"I can help, today isn't actually my birthday."

Frank walks into the kitchen. "Listen to your brother. He knows what he's talking about."

"Okay. What should I do?"

"Go sit at the table and join the conversations." Frank was happy to help Jamie understand that he needed to relax and have fun. It was a nice switch from trying to get the older kids to do their chores.

Jamie went back to the dining room, and everyone was laughing again or still laughing he wasn't sure.

"Jamie, because of Christmas we won't get to do a fun activity for your birthday until Christmas vacation. Is there an activity that you want to do?" Mary asked looking around the room hoping others would give ideas.

"I already did a fun activity." Jamie wasn't sure if he was supposed to tell anyone about the gun range earlier in the day.

"What did you do?" Betty couldn't figure out what he was talking about.

"Me, Danny, and Frank went to the gun range today." Jamie looked around the table afraid of how they would react.

"We know, we all went on our eighth birthdays." Joe smiled.

"You did?"

"Yeah, they did. It's important to know gun safety. You do live in a house full of cops." Mary wasn't happy about it. She wanted to keep him away from anything that could lead him to becoming a cop, but they all decided that today was about Jamie being happy. They all knew if anyone deserved it, it was Jamie.

"That's a necessity living here. So, what would you like to do?" Betty knew the topic needed to change. Henry had done the same with Frank and she hadn't been happy either. She knew that they could have that conversation after Jamie went to bed.

"Am I really gonna live here forever?"

"If you want to, but I bet when you get older after you graduate high school your gonna want to move out or go to college."

"I really want to go to college, but I need to get a job now so I can pay for it and my mom told me I can apply for scholarships that will help me."

"You won't be getting a job any time soon, but we will start an allowance for any chores you do around the house just like Danny, Joe, and Erin get and once you get old enough then you can get a job."

The next thing Jamie knew Danny and Frank were walking out with the cheesecake and big bowls of fruit and chocolate sauce. Once everything was on the table everyone started singing to him and he wanted to hide under the table. He'd spent all of the eight years that he could remember trying to be invisible either to get away from his abusive father or to not draw attention to himself and his mom while they were homeless.

Joe noticed Jamie tense. Thankfully the song was over in the next minute. Joe wondered how Jamie was going to respond when the presents came out after they were finished eating.

Jamie was so full. An entire month of eating three times a day and after a lifetime of not it was still something he was getting used to. He tried to eat small amounts, but it seemed like each week Mary and Betty were giving him just a little more food each meal. He knew he didn't eat much, but he thought he ate enough. After all the attention of the day he just wanted to go and get his current book and go to his room and read.

"Time for presents!" Erin squealed. She loved birthdays. All of her siblings did. Their family always made sure that their birthdays were special days. Erin figured no matter how bad things were that at least Jamie's birthdays were still special, but she was wrong.

"Okay."

Mary, Erin, and betty all went and got the few little presents that they had gotten Jamie.

Jamie was shocked to see so many presents. He'd only ever got a present for his birthday one year and it had been a library card. He still had it even though he didn't know if it worked anymore or not. It was something he'd always keep because it came from his mom.

His first present was a sci-fi book series. He was so excited. The second present was a new pair of tennis shoes, the third present was a picture of Jamie's mom that Frank had been able to find. They were planning on giving it to him at Christmas, but decided his birthday was better, and the last gift from grandma and grandpa was a savings bond for college for eight-hundred dollars for college.

"Jamie, each year we give each of our grandkids a hundred-dollar savings bond for college."

"But I'm not your grandkid." Jamie gave Henry puzzling look.

"Yes, you are, and once the adoption is finalized everyone will see it that way, but we're not waiting until then." Henry whispered in Jamie's ear while he gave him a hug.

Jamie couldn't stop the tears. They were happy tears. "Thank you."

The rest of the night is spent listening to music and playing games. This is the first night in the month that Jamie's been at the Reagan house that he hasn't disappeared up to his room to read or sleep.

Henry and Betty were getting ready to leave when they notice that Jamie had fallen asleep in one of the chairs. He still had a smile on his face. That alone made everyone smile.

"Mary, I'm gonna take him up to bed." Frank picked Jamie up and loved that Jamie actually curled into him. It was the first time that Jamie had that reaction. Frank hoped for more days like these but was a realist and knew that something would eventually happen, and he just hoped whatever it was didn't set Jamie too far back.

The next morning when Mary went to get all the kids up and she found Jamie already up and changed and was packing his backpack. Erin wanted five more minutes. Joe got up but was grumpy, and Danny threw a pillow at his mom. This was a typical morning. Erin would get up the second time her mom woke her up and Danny would get up after a short fight.

Jamie was so excited knowing that he was going to get to stay at this school. His teacher immediately noticed something had changed. Jamie was still quiet, but he smiled and based on his grades she knew that he knew that he understood what was going , but he never raised his hand. Today he was raising his hand at each question. She had no idea what happened but didn't really care.

They had two weeks before Christmas and the two-week Christmas break. It was tradition for the class to pick their volunteer project for the year. Second grade was the first year that the kids get to go and volunteer. In kindergarten and first grade they write letters and take part in the school bake sales.

This year Jamie's class was helping out in the soup kitchen.

"Mary, do you have a second?" Ms. Lismore asked. She'd had Joe and Erin in her class and was very familiar with the Reagans and all the good that they did for the city.

"Yeah, where's Jamie?"

"Organizing the class book shelves. He was very happy to help. I wanted to ask you a couple questions."

"Is everything okay?" Mary was worried that Jamie was getting bullied at school.

"Everything's great. This year the class will be volunteering in the soup kitchen, and I wanted to know if Jamie will be with us for the rest of the year."

"Yes, he will. We are adopting him."

"Did he find that out last week?"

"Yes. We found out that we'd missed his birthday too, so we had a small surprise celebration for him too. Despite what had happened earlier in the weekend he smiled more than we've ever seen. I did learn that he's been dealing with some bullies here at school."

"He's never come to me about anything. I'll keep any eye out, but I've noticed a big difference. He's been participating every day this week. It's been obvious to me since the day I met him that he's very smart but has always been very shy and likes to hide away in the corner."

"He wasn't participating before?" Mary wondered if there were other issues at school that she didn't know about.

"No. His homework is always more complete than anyone else's. If there's extra credit he always, does it, but up until last week he wouldn't participate in class. This week he's almost a different kid, which is why I wanted to talk to you."

"I agree. He's found a new confidence."

"We've made some changes to the volunteering program since your kids were in it. Each year the teacher picks one student to be the volunteer leader. The leader does some research and explains why the work that the class is doing is important. They also help me assign some of the tasks when we spend our time at the soup kitchen. Mary, I was Jamie to be the leader this year, but I'm not sure if you'll approve."

"Jamie understands the soup kitchen better than any other kid in your class. I'm certain of that. I think it's a great idea and will get him out of his comfort zone, but I'm worried that it may come up why he knows the soup kitchen so well and it will lead to more bullying."

"We spend three hours a week in the soup kitchen, we like there to be parent volunteers, would you be willing to one of our volunteers?"

"Yes, and if there's any bullying will be handled?"

"Absolutely. Thank you for volunteering."

"Okay. When will you tell Jamie?"

"The day we get back from Christmas vacation. I don't want him to worry about it during vacation."

"Thank you."

Mary left the school with a sense of pride for her youngest son, they just needed to get the adoption finalized.

The week before Christmas is hectic. There are school parties and the Christmas play and events with extended family. It was a whirlwind for Jamie. The Reagan's extended family was very big. He learned that Mary came from a big family, and her father, who passed the same year as his grandfather, and all of her brothers are NYPD too. Before the family party, the largest event he'd ever attended was the Christmas party for the foster kids at the mall. He'd met so many new people his head was spinning, and he was exhausted.

Frank and Mary noticed that Jamie's progress seemed to have halted. They notice that Jamie's back to hiding again, and he's gone quiet. They encourage Jamie to take a nap before midnight mass. Jamie doesn't put up a fight because he hadn't been sleeping well. The encounter with his dad had affected him more than he thought it did. His nightmares had intensified enough to wake him up again.

Two hours later Jamie was still sleeping. Joe was worried with everything going on that Jamie was getting sick because he hadn't heard him getting up.

"Mom, I think something's wrong with Jamie." Joe was worried.

"I agree with you. It's not like the kid's ever been loud, but he's back to being almost mute again." Danny agreed with Joe.

"He can't be sick for his first Christmas with us." Erin wanted to run up to his room and check on him.

"I don't think he's sick, but I'll check on him. I think that he's had a lot going on, and he might be a little overwhelmed." Mary reassured her children.

Their fears masked hers, but she didn't want to worry them.

"Frank let's go check on Jamie. I'm worried." Mary said as she entered the kitchen.

"I agree." Frank looked at his dad. "Will you take the kids to mass and then we'll meet you guys there."

"Of course. I hope he's okay. If you guys don't make it, we'll understand."

When Frank and Mary got into Jamie's room, they found him crying looking out the window.

"Jamie what's wrong?" Mary grabbed some tissues and pulled Jamie onto her lap.

"Is Mason gonna get out of jail and come kill me like he did my mom?"

"Mason has been arrested and with his offense he isn't going to get out any time soon. It doesn't matter how good his lawyer is. He did some things that helped us catch him and will help the DA make sure he spends the rest of his life in prison." Frank tried to reassure Jamie.

"Have you been having nightmares since that day in the mall?" Mary was starting to regret her decision to let Jamie help.

"Yes. No. I always have bad dreams." Jamie wiped his eyes again.

"Do you talk to anyone about your bad dreams?" Frank had a bad habit of keeping things to himself because of the things he saw every day but knew that his kids needed a better role model.

"Joe's found me up a couple times and he guessed that I had bad dreams, but we don't talk we either read or we go back to his room and he reads me a story."

"You can always come to us. Are you up to going to midnight mass?"

"Yes."

"Okay. The others already left. Let's go and then we can sleep in tomorrow."

"I have a dollar, will one of you help me light a candle for my mom tonight?"

"Yes. Why don't we make it a new tradition, so your mom is always a part of our Christmas celebration."

"Thank you!" Jamie gave them both a hug and hurried to put on his suit, so he was ready to leave.

Mary and Frank were both happy that he told them what was going on. The road ahead was still rocky, but they had hope.

The conversation with Frank and Mary the night before helped Jamie to sleep better. Jamie was quiet Christmas morning, but not because of fear because of wonder. He'd never experienced anything like this before.

Christmas morning began with delectable cinnamon rolls. Jamie had never had anything so good. He loved them so much he and Joe split a second one. There was fresh fruit and hot chocolate too.

"It's time for presents!" Mary said as she cleaned up the breakfast dishes and put the one remaining cinnamon roll away. They would be cleaned when dinner preparations began.

The entire family made their way into the living room where the Christmas tree was. The only place Jamie had ever seen so many presents under the tree was in a store window, and he knew those were empty boxes. He didn't think that these were empty boxes.

When all of the kids were little, they would open their presents first and then the adults. Over the last few years things had changed, now they went around the room, and each opened a present. Knowing Jamie didn't like attention on him, Mary went around the room and gave everyone one of their presents. Each of the kids all said from Santa.

"This is really for me?" Jamie asked. "Thank you."

"Your welcome. We open presents youngest to oldest, so you'll go first, and Henry will go last."

Jamie opened his present and saw another Sci-fi book collection. The bookshelf in his room was filling up quickly and he loved having so many books to choose from.

Two hours later all the presents were opened, but one. Frank had gone out to the garage and had the gift waiting in the dining room.

"There's one gift left, and it's too big to wrap. Frank's going to bring it in a minute. It's for you Jamie." Mary smiled.

A minute later Frank walked into the room with a new bike. It was blue and shiny, and Jamie couldn't believe it was his.

"I don't know how to ride a bike." Jamie said sadly.

"I'll teach you." Frank had taught all of the kids how to ride. Jamie would be no different.

Jamie got up and gave Frank the biggest hug.

The rest of the morning was spent relaxing and enjoying their presents. Jamie was on cloud nine.

"Do I still get to do an outing for my birthday?" Jamie asked Mary in the kitchen when she was cleaning up the breakfast dishes.

"Yes, did you figure out what you wanted to do?"

"Can I visit my mom at the cemetery?"

Mary put down the dish she was washing, and she wiped off her hands.

"You can visit your mom whenever you want. That's not a birthday outing. All I ask is that someone is with you. Okay?"

"Okay. Can I go visit my mom today?"

"Yeah. Why don't you go and ask Frank to take you now. That way you guys will be back in time for dinner."

"Are you sure that I don't need to help cook?"

"Visiting your mom is more important. Why don't you get Joe and Danny to help you do the dishes after dinner."

"Okay, cool. Yeah, I will. Erin shouldn't help because she's helping cook. Thank you, Mary." Jamie gave her a big hug and went in search of Frank.

Ten minutes later after they were dressed appropriately for the weather, Jamie and Frank were walking to the cemetery. It was cold, but the cold, didn't really bother Jamie. He didn't understand why they always insisted that he wear so many clothes.

Frank went and visited his grandparents who were not far from Jamie's mom, so Jamie could have some time to himself.

"Mom, I've been staying with Mary and her family. When you sent me to her did you know her husband's a cop? He arrested Mason. I'm safe because of them, and they want to adopt me too. I hope that's okay. They have three kids."

Jamie was trying not to cry. He'd visited his mom before but wasn't sure what to do. Now he had so much to tell her he just decided to talk to her. He missed talking to her. They never had anything besides each other but that had been all they needed at the time.

"Merry Christmas mom. I love you and I hope you're proud of me. I'm going to school now like you always wanted and I'm doing the best I can."

Frank had walked back over because they had been outside for a while, and they needed to get back home for dinner.

"Jamie, I know your mom is proud of you because I know we all are."

"You are. You really think she'd be proud. School is harder than I thought."

"I know it for sure. What about school's hard?" Frank was beginning to think that maybe Jamie studied all the time was because he didn't understand something.

"All the people there. I thought that I'd be given books and be able to read, but I have to talk to people. It's hard."

"But you're doing great. Mary talked to your teacher last week. You've gone through a lot of changes and a lot of hard things in the last month and half. Give yourself some time and come to us when you're having a hard time."

"I will. I have a question."

"You can always ask a question. What is it?"

"When you and Mary adopt me do I get to call you mom and dad or do I still have to call you Frank and Mary because I'm not actually your kid."

"You can start calling us mom and dad whenever you're ready. We want to give you our last name too."

"I'd get to be Jamie Reagan instead of O'Hare!" Jamie was excited. He could get away from his Mason.

"Yes, if that's what you want. If you want to keep your name, you can do that too."

"I want to be a Reagan. You guys are amazing. I just hope I don't let you down." Jamie frowned. He was always afraid he wasn't good enough.

"Don't worry about that. Let's focus on the future, but first lets go home and eat. I don't know about you, but I'm hungry."

"Me too, and if the food is as good as it was this morning then I may eat more food than I ever have before."

"I'm glad you like the food so much."

"Can you tell your mom and Mary to stop giving me so much food."

"You've noticed that they keep giving you a little more food each meal huh."

Frank and Jamie were halfway home, and Jamie stopped.

"They're giving me as much food as Danny eats. I can't eat that much."

"I'll talk to them. I know they did it because they want to make sure that you have enough to eat."

"That is one problem I'll never have as long as I'm living in your house." Jamie laughed.

Frank laughed too. Frood is something they've always had an abundance of.

Frank was able to get to his mom and wife before dinner was served. He knew Jamie was aware of the things around him, but the fact that he noticed the little extra they gave him each time made him laugh.

Mary and Betty were able to stop themselves from giving Jamie a Danny portion at dinner.

Dinner was a fun event. When it was over Jamie got Danny and Joe to help him with the dishes and the entire family could hear the three of them laughing in the kitchen. When Frank entered the kitchen to see how much longer until dessert, he found Danny holding Jamie upside down while Joe tickled his stomach.

"This is your punishment for volunteering us for dish duty." Danny said without knowing his dad had walked in.

"Mary, Betty, and Erin cooked so we should do the dishes." Jamie said in between laughing.

"Put him down Danny. He just ate."

"Fine." Danny put Jamie down. "Kid, I don't do anything I don't have to. If you want to clean, then you can clean. I'm gonna…". Danny stopped what he was gonna say when he saw his dad standing there.

"Daniel, please finish what you were going to say."

"I'm gonna help so we can all eat dessert sooner."

"No, you were gonna say you were gonna sit while Jamie and I did all the work." Joe told his dad what Danny had said while Jamie was bringing the plates in from the dining room.

"That's what I thought I was gonna hear. Jamie, you've done more than your fair share of the work, why don't you take the apple pie, and Joe why don't you take the ice cream into the dining room." Frank had a good guess as what happened.

Before Jamie came into the house Danny was struggling with some things, but he was pulling his weight. Now he seemed to be working harder at school but was taking advantage of the little kid that thinks he needs to do all the work to keep his place in the house.

"Danny unless something crazy happens Jamie's here to stay. You guys were doing better earlier today. What happened?"

"You're gonna teach him to ride a bike, and mom's meeting with his teacher. I'm going to graduate next year, and I still need you guys too."

"Have you ever felt like we haven't had time for you after Joe and Erin were born?" Frank didn't understand where this was coming from.

"No, but they don't have the past that he does. He's going to need more from all of us, but more so you and mom. I'm worried about how it's going to affect mom, if that something crazy happens and he can't stay."

"When have we ever not looked at a problem or a challenge we were facing as a family?"

"You're right dad. I'll be a better big brother. I think he needs all the big brothers he can get."

"I think you're right. Let's go finish Christmas dinner, and then you can finish the dishes."

Danny laughed. "Okay."