Chapter Four: Choir
The water was warm to the touch as she was leaning back a little. It paid off getting up earlier than normal to bathe. She has been here a full month now. Jane and Tarna were helping her in every way they could think of to help her get over her block. No success. Alanna and Moiraine were also trying their hardest as well. Alessia couldn't help but feel like a failure at this. Lanfear swore up and down at them about that night. 'I can still sense the Power inside of her. We need to find a way to get it out.' Moiraine would often say. She had several run-ins with Lillen Sedai. Getting bolder on trying to have more conversations with the older woman. She had come to find out more about spiders. Loving the tiny creatures. She heard from Alanna there was an insect weave to repel insects. It was how the Tower was clear of any pests except for the garden. Moiraine was leaving today with Jane. She felt upset her friend was leaving but she was happy Jane was getting more experience. She stood up once she was done cleaning up. Pulling the drain plug to allow the water to drain. Grabbing her towel as she dried herself off. Putting on the Novice dress while tying the apron on. She sighed lightly as she rubbed her hair dry. It was now past her waist. Folding up her dirty clothes with her towel, she made her way out of the washroom. Humming softly as her wet hair was just hanging now. Once inside her bedroom, she grabbed her brush and gently brushed her wet hair out before grabbing her bag. She made her way out of her room. Closing the door as she went down the hallway.
"Alessia!" Alice's voice came. She turned and smiled at the brunette. She had gotten closer to Alice in the month she had been there. She was smiling at the girl as she made her way up.
"Hello Alice. You're up early." Alessia spoke while they were walking down the stairs.
"I could say the same to you." Alice spoke as she was beaming non stop.
"Sleep well?" Alessia asked as they turned down a hallway.
"I couldn't sleep! Today is the day Alanna Sedai is opening the doors for anyone who wants to try out for the choir!" Alice spoke.
"Oh that's today! I totally forgot! I am rooting for you!" Alessia spoke as she entered a room to put her dirty clothes away in the laundry basket. Seeing the Tower servants already up and washing the clothes.
"I am much better at it because of you. I was wondering. Will you try out with me?" Alice asked as Alessia smiled.
"Are you sure? It's your thing." Alessia spoke while leaning against a pillar.
"It's our thing! Alessia, I know you love to sing. I've heard you sing when you think you are alone." Alice crossed her arms. Alessia blushed from embarrassment. Hearing footsteps as they both looked up and bowed. Moiraine had shown up.
"Sleep well, I hope?" Moiraine asked as they both nodded their heads. Moiraine was then weaving air. Alessia felt the air move through her hair and gasped with a smile.
"I really wish I can channel!" Alessia spoke softly.
"And you will. You just need to keep focusing and surrender yourself to the Source." Moiraine spoke with a smile.
"I heard you're going on a mission." Alessia added. Moiraine smiled at her.
"I see you are up to date with your information. I am proud of you." The woman in blue spoke as Alessia smiled and bowed again. She felt a hug from Moiraine. She was starting to get used to hugs from her. Watching Moiraine take her leave.
"May the Light protect you, Moiraine Sedai!" Alessia spoke after the woman. She looked over her shoulder while still smiling.
"Come on! We should get started!" Alice spoke. Alessia smiled as she turned and followed her new friend across the garden as they made their way to their class.
Alessia was now nose deep in the chapter Lanfear had assigned them. Hearing a knock as they looked up.
"Sister Lanfear, I apologize. I am dropping off another student for you." Alanna spoke. Alessia gasped with a smile as Alice waved at her.
"Interesting. She was struggling not long ago." Lanfear spoke as she waved her hand for Alice to come in. Seeing her new friend take a spot next to her near the back. Watching Lanfear walk around while passing out paper. Alessia looked at the one she had gotten. It was a test. She smiled lightly and looked at Alice.
"You got this." Alessia whispered to her. Seeing her friend nod her head.
"You have until the bell to finish. You may begin." Lanfear spoke as there was a lot of scratching of pens against paper. Alessia read over the questions and what not. Smiling as she began. It started easy and then started to get harder. Alessia could feel her friend take a few deep breaths almost every few minutes. She looked at her and gave her an encouraging smile before standing up. Seeing eyes on her as she walked over and handed Lanfear her paper.
"You may go." Lanfear spoke. Alessia smiled and bowed to her before packing her stuff. She headed out of the classroom. She took a seat on the bench out in the garden. Closing her eyes while looking up. Feeling the warmth upon her face. She felt someone watching her. Sure enough, when she looked over her shoulder, she saw her. Alessia smiled softly at Lillen and waved. To her surprise, Lillen smiled at her. It was an actual smile! Alessia felt her cheeks blush fully at this before quickly looking away. She heard the bell ring as she jumped up and ran back to the classroom. Standing by the exit and saw Alice handing hers in before leaving.
"How did you do?" Alessia asked as Alice smiled before taking the lead.
"I think I did alright! I was able to understand most of it! To be honest, I never thought I would be placed in the advanced class." Alice spoke. They had free time until after lunch. Seeing Alanna leave the Novice class and walk right past them before stopping to look.
"Are you both coming or not?" Alanna asked with a smile. Alessia and Alice looked at each other before dashing after Alanna with a smile. They followed the woman in green into another room. There were only a couple other people there as well.
"They are here to help out with the open door tryouts. Providing with the music and singing any chorus parts. You all will be singing together and we shall go from there. We will wait a few more minutes to see if anyone else joins." Alanna spoke. Alessia couldn't help but feel nervous at this. She didn't expect for them all to be going at once. Within a few moments, several more girls came into the room. All chattering with excitement. Alessia nudged her friend Alice who seemed to be afraid.
"We can do this." Alessia spoke with encouragement as Alice nodded her head.
"Alright! Listen up! Everyone gather around." Alanna spoke as she handed out the copy of the song to everyone. Alanna was then putting everyone in a spot. A good few feet from each other. That way she would walk around to hear each of them. "Are we ready?" Alanna asked. Alessia was looking at the music and smiled. Giving her friend a nod. Hearing the music begin.
Ashandore soufrait,
No'ma(mi) cuebiyar,
Avrunya fel ravid fonnenye
Puniya tawele
Gadhavya fel maranya
Kiseri trewele
No'noup mah
Domash
Kutya a'asa
Ellis sheikar
Fel mashi tasu
Ashandore soufrait,
No'ma(mi) cuebiyar,
Avrunya fel ravid fonnenye
Puniya tawele
Gadhavya fel maranya
Kiseri trewele
No'noup mah
Domash
Kutya a'asa
Ellis sheikar
Fel mashi tasu
Alanna had finished walking around and smiled. She had taken everyone's copy of the song while they were all waiting.
"I will have a list of the names after lunch. I will put them up on the door. I do apologize that only three will be able to make it." Alanna spoke. Alessia could hear her friend groan softly and looked down. Resting a hand on Alice's shoulder and smiled softly. They had left the room as Alice was pacing back and forth as they entered the hallway.
"Alice. It's going to be alright! It's over and done. All we have to do is wait." Alessia spoke as Alice only sighed and leaned against the pillar while watching a few Accepteds practice their weaves. Alessia frowned at this.
"Hey. You will be able to weave again soon. Don't worry." Alice spoke.
"Now look at who is encouraging who." Alessia spoke as they both chuckled lightly.
"I'm just nervous." Alice spoke as she leaned over the rail. Alessia could only smile at her friend. She wasn't worried about it. If she got in or not. Either way, she would not do it without Alice.
"What if you get in and I don't?" Alice asked with a frown.
"Then I will give my spot to someone else." Alessia spoke while looking at her again.
"Why?" Alice then asked.
"We agreed to do it together. Either together or not at all. Except if you get in and I don't, I will cheer you on from the back." Alessia spoke. She could tell this made her friend happy.
"No. I won't do it without you." She added. Alessia laughed lightly and touched Alice's arm and placed her chin on her shoulder.
"What is that?" Alice asked.
"What is, what?" Alessia asked as she put her bag over her shoulder.
"That thing you did. I've seen Jane do it a lot and Moiraine Sedai." Alice spoke.
"Oh. It's a thing we do to people we care about. It's more like a shoulder hug kind of thing." Alessia spoke as she was trying to explain it. "I'm not much of a hugging type of person so, I do the shoulder thing." Alessia spoke.
"So, what do you do if you like someone?" Alice asked as the lunch bell rang. Seeing the color drain from her friend's face. Alessia laughed and linked their arms and pulled her friend gently. They made their way down to the dining hall.
"Well, I'm not sure. I never really took a romantic interest in someone." Alessia spoke as she grabbed a plate that had an apple, and a sandwich. She was watching her friend as she was sitting there. Hand on her cup. Alessia touched her shoulder as their eyes met.
"It's going to be alright. Even if you don't get in this time around. There is always another time." Alessia spoke.
"You're right. I'm sorry. I just really want this." Alice spoke as she began to eat. She received a glare from an Accepted as she shut up real quickly. She had forgotten the no talking during mealtimes rule. Alessia nodded as she began to eat as well. She enjoyed the sandwich a bit more than she thought. They had weaving class after lunch. She hated sitting there writing an essay about the weave Alanna teaches. Since she couldn't weave, she had to write an essay on the weave. Her hands were getting cramped from all the writing. Always going to the library right after her last class for this. They had finished eating while putting their dishes up. Alessia could feel her friend getting more anxious by the moment. Feeling her arm linked as they made their way back and they were stopped.
"Next time, keep your mouth shut during mealtimes." The Accepted spoke with her arms crossed before taking her leave. They looked at each other before laughing lightly and made their way back. Seeing Alanna put up the list before taking her leave. Seeing other girls gather around to look.
"Here goes." Alice spoke.
"Good luck." Alessia spoke while watching her friend walk up to it. Alessia looked to her right and saw Lillen walk up to her. She was silent for a moment.
"You try out?" She asked. Her words. They were just. Alessia could melt at the sound of her voice. She blushed and looked to the side.
"I did." Alessia spoke as Alice walked back up to her with a straight face. "What is it?" Alessia asked as she frowned. Then Alice burst into a smile and was jumping up and down.
"We got in!" She nearly shouted. She bowed to Lillen as did Alessia. The older woman took her leave. "Oh by the Light! I cannot believe I got in! I'm so happy! First class is today after the last main classes!" Alice spoke as she was jumping up and down again. Alessia walked up to the list and sure enough, her name was on top. Alice was on the bottom. Another girl was in the middle. An Accepted. She wasn't surprised there. Feeling her arm pulled again as they made their way to the new empty classroom where Alanna asked them to meet for their class. She couldn't wait to tell Jane and Tarna about the new class she joined. Sitting down on the top of the desk as Alanna came into the room.
"Hello dears! Congrats on Alice and Alessia on making the choir!" Alanna spoke as she and a few others clapped. Alessia couldn't help but blush a little at this. "Now. Today we are going to learn how to create a ball of light in our palm." Alanna spoke. Hearing excited chattering at this. Alessia frowned and sat in her chair and pulled out paper and her pen and began to write.
The bell had rung for the class to end. Alessia watched the others take their leave.
"See you in music!" Alice spoke as Alessia nodded her head. She sighed and felt defeated again. She packed her bag and followed Alanna outside back to the garden. Seeing flowers blooming as fruits began to grow. It was so warm outside! Seeing the green pillows on the ground again.
"Moiraine left something for me to give to you until she comes back." Alanna spoke as Alessia was handed the pendant.
"I thought Novices aren't allowed jewelry?" Alessia asked. Then it hit it. "Oh." She spoke as Alanna nodded her head. Moiraine wanted her to keep trying on the pendant. She sat down and tucked it away into her pocket. Crossing her legs and taking a deep breath.
"Now, focus on the bud of the flower. Watch it bloom. Take in every curve and color of the flower you see in your mind." Alanna spoke as Alessia closed her eyes. Trying to focus on the bud blooming in her mind. She could see the flower. It was not pink. It was black. Raising a brow at this before ignoring the meaning of it if there was one. "Surrender yourself to it. Let the feeling of the gentleness take over." Alanna spoke. Alessia frowned at this. She did not want to surrender to anything. Was that her issue? The reason she was blocked? Frowning at this thought as she inhaled again. Deeply this time. She felt like she was being watched. Opening her eyes to see Alanna and the other two have their eyes closed. Alessia looked to her left and saw Lillen leaning against a pillar watching her. Why was she always watching her? Alessia turned back to the front. Feeling her cheeks rise with heat. She felt frustrated at this. She huffed a little.
"What is it, Alessia?" Alanna asked as Alessia looked up at her.
"I don't think this is working." She frowned.
"Try again." Alanna spoke.
"I am trying. I even do this before bed." Alessia spoke with a sigh. Looking down at her hands in her lap.
"You are both dismissed." Alanna spoke as Alessia watched the other two take their leave. Alanna had moved in front of Alessia and sat down. "What seems to be the issue?" Alanna asked.
"Surrendering myself?" Alessia asked with a questioning look.
"Yes. You have to surrender to the One Power. Let it take over you before you can start using it." Alanna spoke.
"I don't understand." Alessia spoke.
"Understand what my dear?" Alanna asked. She seemed to be frowning as well.
"I channeled that night. When Lanfear Sedai brought me in." Alessia spoke.
"Do you mind telling me how it happened?" Alanna asked.
"Well. It started as my mother telling me to go outside with the man that was there. She wanted me to find someone to marry." Alessia spoke as she made a face. Alanna was listening to every word she was saying. As was Lillen who was not far from them. "So, he tried forcing himself on me. I was angry and that's when it happened." Alessia spoke softly. Frowning at the memory.
"So, it was triggered from anger." Alanna spoke as Alessia nodded her head lightly.
"Anger is one of the biggest triggers to touch the Source. We need to find a different approach to help you get unblocked." Alanna spoke. Watching the woman stand up and smile. "Come. Time for music." Alanna spoke. Alessia stood up and picked her bag up. She turned to look behind her and waved a little with a smile at Lillen. The older woman smiled back at her again. That smile. What was it about? Alessia quickly turned away and followed Alanna into the room from earlier. Alice was already inside with a smile.
"Now, welcome to our three new singers!" Alanna spoke as the others greeted them and what not with hugs. Alessia tried to avoid the hugs. There were only two Accepteds, two Novices, and four sisters. Alanna's warders were the only men in the room. "Now that we have a full choir, I shall break the news. In a few months time, we will be traveling to Andor to put on a small concert to raise money for the new local orphanage!" Alanna spoke. Hearing a lot of chattering from this. They focused as they received the list. Alessia felt a little excited about this. "We will also have a few of you be our dancers with myself." Alanna added. Alessia gasped. Dancing was the one thing she loved to do. Remembering her and Jane dancing around the pond when they were younger. Seeing Alanna give her a wink before clearing her throat. She smiled softly while hearing the others begin to warm up their voices. Alanna had walked over to Alice and herself.
"Now. I know you did struggle a little on a few verses but I know with practice with Alessia, you'll have it down in no time." Alanna spoke to Alice who blushed and nodded her head.
"Thank you Alanna Sedai." Alice spoke. This had made her friend really happy.
"Let us begin! We shall start with Young Love." Alanna spoke. Alessia looked at the music and hummed softly. She was warming up her voice with Alice as they began. Hearing the music played by Alanna's warders. Alessia couldn't help but feel better now. The song then transitioned into Last Light. Alessia was actually enjoying this song. Actually singing out this time around. Seeing Alanna smile at her as the final bell had rang.
"Alessia, a word?" Alanna asked.
"I'll meet you later." Alessia spoke as Alice nodded and took her leave. "Alanna Sedai." Alessia spoke as she gave the woman a bow with a smile.
"It seems to me that you are enjoying yourself?" Alanna asked. Alessia nodded her head quickly. "Maybe this can be an outlet to help you channel. I want to hear you singing more often!" Alanna spoke. Alessia turned a little pink at this.
"You mean to say, you want me to sing outside of this class?" Alessia asked as the woman nodded her head.
"I am not sure how I feel about that. I mean, I have done it before and Alice told me she heard me sing. I'd rather not let others hear me sing outside of this class." Alessia spoke.
"I can understand if you feel embarrassed but you should never feel embarrassed doing something you love. Or be embarrassed loving someone." Alanna added. Alessia raised a brow.
"Are you and Alice? You know. Pillow friends?" Alanna asked. Alessia shook her head quickly.
"We are not!" Alessia spoke as Alanna chuckled.
"No need to be embarrassed dear. I also have seen how Moiraine looks at you." Alanna spoke. Alessia raised a brow at this. "Reason I asked is because Moiraine wishes to take you under her wing." Alanna spoke.
"Oh. I can't even channel." Alessia frowned at this.
"I know. A sister cannot take one under her wing if one is still a Novice or cannot channel yet." Alanna spoke. Alessia nodded her head at this to show she understood.
"I also did not think Moiraine wanted that. To be honest, I've been focused on my studies more than anything. I haven't really thought about anything else." Alessia spoke.
"Maybe that's why." Alanna spoke. Alessia gave the older woman a confused look. "You are very tense my dear. Go rub one out." Alanna spoke.
"Alanna Sedai!" Alessia nearly shouted as her face was red. Alanna however was chuckling.
"You may leave dear." Alanna spoke as Alessia nodded. Her face was still a dark shade of red as she dashed out of the room. Turning a corner and smacking right into someone. She felt herself stumble backwards and almost fall over. She looked up to see a woman brushing herself off.
"Lillen Sedai! I am so sorry!" Alessia spoke as she gave the woman a bow.
"No worries. I'm used to it by now." Lillen spoke as she put her hands behind her back. Alessia locked eyes with the dark ones with her blue ones as her cheeks were still red. She wasn't embarrassed anymore. Instead, she was now blushing at this woman for some reason. "Are you alright?" Lillen asked with a smirk. Alessia shook her head. "Care to tell me?" Lillen then asked. Alessia shook her head at this. In truth, she was feeling embarrassed from her talk with Alanna and now seeing Lillen now in front of her. She was taking in every detail again. The older woman took a step closer to her and Alessia felt her heart beat sky rocket at this.
"You're staring." Lillen spoke. Alessia jumped.
"I'm..I'm sorry!" Alessia spoke with another bow before taking off again.
She made it to the library as her heart was pounding. She sat down at her usual table and pulled out her book of weaves she checked out a while back. She needed to recheck it out just in case. Pulling out her paper and sighed. Tapping her pen on the paper while staring out of the window. It felt odd. Why would Moiraine want to take her under her wing? There were so many others that were more worthy of Moiraine's attention than she was. Frowning at the thought of still not being able to channel. She began to write about the light that can be created with a simple weave. She explained the elements that were needed and then how to create the weave. Alanna was always surprised at Alessia explaining how to create the weave in words. As if she was doing them herself. Once she had finished, she put the essay away and pulled out the drawing book again. She flipped through the pages. She had several drawings of different spiders. She began to just draw a random one. It was a black spider. The most dangerous and poisonous one. Moghedien. She wrote the word in it and smiled. It was a beautiful black spider. She sighed while packing her bag while grabbing the book of weaves and walked over to the woman at the desk.
"Hello dear. Checking out or rechecking out?" She asked.
"I am rechecking it out, Adeleas Sedai." Alessia spoke with a smile as she signed her name by the title of the book on the list. She put the book back into her bag and took her leave from the library. Sighing softly with a small smile.
"Daughter Alessia." Sheriam's voice made her jump. She turned around to see the older woman in blue and an Accepted from earlier next to her.
"Daughter Elida here said you were speaking during mealtime?" Sheriam asked.
"I uh." Alessia spoke and then sighed with a nod of her head.
"Very well. Follow me. You may go." Sheriam spoke. Alessia frowned. Following Sheriam to her office again. She hated that the girl snitched. Sighing in defeat as she set her bag down. Seeing Sheriam pull out the switch.
"You know the drill." She spoke. Alessia nodded her head and got on her knees. Feeling the back of her dress unzipped again. Feeling the lashes against her skin as she groaned. Biting her lips to keep herself from crying out. This was proof that she couldn't trust anyone in the Tower. Maybe just her three close friends. She felt her eyes sting once Sheriam was done.
"Let this be a lesson. Next time you will face the belt." Sheriam spoke. Alessia nodded her head and bowed before taking her leave. Putting her bag over her left shoulder as her right shoulder was now raw and bleeding again. Guess she shouldn't talk during mealtimes now. She huffed lightly as her legs were carrying her up the stairs to the healer floor. She knocked lightly before entering.
"You don't need to knock dear. This room is public." Chesmal's voice came. Alessia nodded her head and wiped the tears from her eyes and sat down.
"Another switching? Sister Sheriam is on a roll today." Chesmal sighed. Alessia gave the woman a confused look. "You are the eighth girl to come to me today from a switching." Chesmal answered.
"I see." Alessia spoke softly. "I deserved it. Spoke during mealtime." Alessia spoke. Feeling a warm sensation against her shoulder again.
"Just be careful next time." Chesmal spoke.
"I got snitched on." Alessia spoke.
"Ah. I see. That's always no fun. The girl is someone who is looking for confirmation from Sister Sheriam, I am afraid. Keep your eyes out for her and try to not break any rules near her." Chesmal spoke.
"Are you suggesting that I am a rule breaker?" Alessia asked. Looking at the woman who chuckled lightly.
"Well. This is the second time you came to me alone from getting the switch. First time with sister Moiraine." Chesmal spoke. She was right. The second time she was late to a class by accident. She felt her stomach growl. She had missed dinner.
"Off you go dear. Get some rest and stay off that shoulder when sleeping tonight." Chesmal spoke.
"Thank you Chesmal Sedai." Alessia spoke with a smile and gave the woman a bow.
She had run into Alice as she made her way back to the Novice quarters of the Tower.
"Where did you go?" Alice asked. Alessia had just realized she missed dinner from her chat with Chesmal Sedai.
"Well, Alanna spoke with me about something and then I ran into Sheriam Sedai. She gave me the switch. That Accepted girl from lunch, told on me. I just left Chesmal Sedai. She healed my shoulder again." Alessia explained to Alice, who frowned.
"I wonder why she didn't snitch me out." Alice spoke. Alessia shrugged her shoulders. They entered Alice's room and Alessia closed the door behind her and sat down on the ground. Leaning against the dresser.
"I got you something." Alice spoke. She pulled out an apple and tossed it to Alessia.
"Oh thank you!" Alessia spoke as she began to eat the apple. She was very hungry. She was thankful for her friends.
"I heard Tarna went with Jane on that mission with Moiraine." Alice then spoke.
"Makes sense. Since she wasn't there today in class." Alessia spoke while munching on the apple. She pulled out the music and was listening to Alice pronounce the words instead of actually singing. Alessia was smiling softly as she set the core of the apple into the wastebasket. She was listening to her friend. She started to sing.
"Honestly, I am really excited about this whole music class. And we get to travel to Andor! Novices don't normally get to leave the Tower unless it's something important!" Alice spoke while smiling non stop.
"Well, this definitely counts as important. I am curious about the dancing part. On how Alanna is going to add it." Alessia spoke. She was lost in thought as she heard a shout.
"Curfew!" Sheriam's voice spoke. Alessia stood up and grabbed her bag before hugging Alice. Making sure she had everything before taking her leave.
"Sleep well!" Alessia spoke as she quickly left the room. Seeing other Novices moving quickly to their own rooms. Alessia made it to hers in time as the hallway lights were now dim. She closed the door and set her bag down. She changed into her nightgown and pulled her hair out. Brushing it before looking back at the dress. Pulling out the pendant from her pocket. Sitting on the bed and focused on it from the center of her palm. The blue stone was sitting up facing her.
Surrender yourself to it. Alanna's voice echoed in her head.
Imagine drifting in the river. Moiraine's voice echoed. Alessia frowned. Neither of it seemed to be helping. She closed her eyes and inhaled. She imagined herself dancing. Dancing around that pond like she did when she was younger. Feeling a slow gentle sensation she opened her eyes to see small swirls of light circling the stone. Alessia gasped. She began to weave the light Alanna taught them earlier. Nothing came. She frowned again at this. She felt frustrated at this. So, she tried again. Closing her eyes as she imagined herself dancing with Jane. Pretending they were weaving like the Aes Sedai women did at that dinner party. She could not feel that sensation that she just had a minute ago again. Frowning as she stood up and walked over to her dresser and set the pendant down. She went back and crawled into bed. Closing her eyes as she yawned lightly. Hoping to fall asleep. And sleep she did as she began to dream of that dance.
"Surrender to me." A honey-like voice spoke to her in her dream. Not knowing where it came from, she pushed it to the back of her mind as she was more focused on dancing when she was younger. It brought a small smile to her face.
–Notes–
Hope you are enjoying the story so far! It's a slow burn for now! I do not own the song! All rights go to the creators!