Author's notes:

Kenobi and Yoda never see a holo recording of Anakin referred to as Darth Vader, so no one knows that Anakin and Vader are the "same" person.

Act 1 Part 5

Shattered Hearts I

Two people may possess a shattered heart, yet they can be completely different nonetheless.

A burning planet… Mustafar… that damned planet… the place where the world broke… where everything she knew had shattered into a million pieces… "I don't know you anymore…" those words echoed in her head… over… over… and over again…

The crushing weight over her was unbearable, nothing had ever felt like this… She opened her eyes to the blinding lamps above her, where was she? What is this place? The world was spinning, placing one of her hands on her head she felt the strained and labored beating of her heart… hearing it reverberate all through her head. She was in some kind of medical bay, there was no medical droid on standby which she found rather peculiar. If she was a patient here would there not be one present to monitor her? What was going on?

Then she felt a sharp pain, unlike she had ever felt before… it felt almost like a spike had been rammed through the back of her head. She felt immense pain, grief… inconsolable grief… she felt a wet bead course its way down her cheek. What was this? But more importantly why did it feel so familiar? She was sure she had never experienced something like this before so then… why does it feel so familiar? Was this a dream? Had everything just been a dream? The Jedi temple burning? The chancellor's proclamation? Anakin's fall to the darkside? Surely none of those things could have been true… surely?

Reaching down towards her stomach with her right hand that had been holding her head, her world broke once more… What? Looking down to verify what she had felt with her hand she began to panic. What? How? She had without a doubt been pregnant for the last nine months, there could be no question about that… could there? Had that been a part of the dream as well? No… it couldn't have. The world was spinning even more now, what the hell is going on? What is happening?

She needed answers… now.

Walking to the door of the room she opened it ignoring the fatigue and exhaustion whose cause she was completely unaware of. Stepping out of the room she looked down the corridor and found a familiar sight…

"Obi Wan, what's going on?" Managing to say that one sentence she then felt how her legs crumpled, managing only to hear the man's response after which everything went dark.

Shattered Hearts II

That which differentiates two shattered hearts is how they came to be shattered.

Obi Wan was completely out of it… he had just experienced the most heart wrenching day of his entire life, there could never be a day like this one ever again. That would be impossible… the pain, the grief… it was all consuming, yet he had to fight through it… how the hell was he going to do that? Was he just lying to himself? How could he do anything? Everything was broken, he could not look in his own reflection without seeing it all flash before him.

Please, you dumb fool… keep it together, please. You have this one to care for now.

Looking down at the baby he was cradling in his arms, he was reminded once again of that horrible memory…

"YOU WERE MY BROTHER ANAKIN!"

"I LOVED YOU!"

Why did it all go wrong? Was it something he had done? Was there something he could've done to prevent all of this? Had he neglected his apprentice in some way? Why? Just why did it all have to have been this way? He had always struggled with his emotions but… how could it have come to this?

"You're all that he left behind, young one… the only good at least…" He felt the quivering in his voice, calm Obi Wan, calm… for the sake of those that are gone… remain calm. Why did he do it… what manner of manipulation and deception could have made him do those things? His friends… the younglings… Padmé… He knew of the special bond that Anakin and Padmé had, yet this? Looking down at the child he could not help but look into her eyes, so reminiscent of her father… his wayward apprentice…

"Oh Anakin, why did you do it?"

It had not been enough that Anakin lost his life to the evil that was the dark side… but Padmé had to… her body lay but a few meters away where she gave birth and then immediately after passed…

"Obi Wan, there is good in him… I know, I know this… still…"

He felt a strange surge go through him, a disturbance or… then from behind him he heard someone speak.

"Obi Wan, what is going on?" He knew that voice, he spun around almost instantly and there stood Padmé very much alive. How? He was standing right next to her when she died, he felt it, it had been plaguing him for the past hours. Then he saw her legs give out and she fell to the floor unconscious. There was no time to think about how the hell this was possible. He shouted for assistance and rushed over to Padmé with her child still in his arms. How was this possible? What is going on?

Fatum Vult / Fate wills it

There is no such thing as accident; it is fate misnamed.

Napoleon Bonaparte

Obi Wan was at a loss for words, the medical staff were baffled. She had been confirmed to be dead, there was no pulse, no breathing, she was beyond any shadow of a doubt dead mere minutes ago. So how was it now possible that he was sitting next to her very much alive self questioning how it was possible. The cause for her death was in of itself a mystery and had been explained as the loss of her will to live, as absurd as that sounded he had accepted it. But now… now there was definitely something mysterious about this entire situation.

After speaking to the medical staff he was even more confused, she was seemingly in perfect condition on top of not being dead. No cellular degeneration, or brain damage, nothing. She was as healthy as could be except for the exhaustion and fatigue. How was this possible, how is she alive? In the back of his mind he knew that he would most likely never get an answer to that burning question but he still wanted to know. Having left Leia to rest alongside her mother he searched for a quiet spot, someplace he could think clearly. He found an empty observatory and sat down in the middle of the globe-shaped room and began to meditate. That feeling… that surge he had felt, it was the force that much he was sure of but why and how was the question. Why did it come and how did it bring the dead Padmé back to life. Or had it done that? He couldn't be sure of anything right now.

Bail and Yoda had already departed before all this happened so there was no one else around to speculate with, the medical staff was too busy questioning their beliefs after witnessing this utterly incomprehensible miracle. Wait… he thought back to when he felt the surge, there was something familiar in it. A presence, digging deeper than before Obi Wan focused himself entirely on that presence. It was an echo… or something akin to it… then an image flashed through his head… bloodshot yellow eyes… Anakin… it was from him. But something had not been entirely right about it… it did not feel like Anakin yet it was unmistakable, it had been him.

But, it felt empty… dead…

A small slither of hope had been planted in his mind yet as soon as it had come it was ripped from him, he was dead… yet this echo must've been the reason for Padmé being alive. This he was certain of. In his last moments he must've somehow given the rest of his life to prevent Padmé from sharing his fate.

"Ohh Anakin…" There was no more peace to be found here, his last act had been one of good, Obi Wan took the little comfort that he was able to find in this and held onto it tightly.

It seems Padmé was right… there was still good in him… but he was dead, never to return.

Walking back towards the room where he had left Padmé and Leia he heard crying, panic arose in him he was not ready for anything else right now, if there was something more to burden his weary mind he would surely crumble together.

Rushing over to the room his heart was lifted from the hole to which it had sunk… Padmé was cradling Leia, seeing it for himself he understood that the tears were once of joy. Although there was an unmistakable underlying tone of sadness in it.

"Padmé you shouldn't be exerting yourself." He was in no condition to take on more grief so he pleaded that she not do anything that could jeopardize the little sanity he was holding onto. "You should lay down and rest."

"Just look at her, my baby…" Her happiness was clear to anyone yet he felt the pain in her heart.

"Yes, she can certainly be compared to one." He could not help but smile at the scene in front of him even though he knew more than what appeared on the surface. "Still you should be resting."

"I feel fine Obi Wan you don't need to worry about me" She replied

"You shouldn't be feeling fine:" Now it was Padmé's turn to be confused.

"What do you mean, "shouldn't?" What was he talking about? How could she not be fine, she felt fine.

"Padmé you were dead no more than a half hour ago, there should be no scenario where you feel fine, especially after all that has happened." What? She had been dead half an hour ago? Also what was he talking about, surely since he was here he must've saved Anakin if everything she remembered was true. Surely…

"What do you mean, dead? She needed to understand what was going on, all she knew right now was that she had given birth somewhere in the haze between now and Mustafar and that Obi Wan clearly had survived.

"You died shortly after giving birth to the twins." That was a mistake, why did he say it?

"Twins?" She exclaimed "Then where is my other child?"

"He… he did not make it Padmé…" She heard the tremble in his voice.

"What do you mean he didn't make it!?" What the hell was going on right now?

Obi Wan was silently cursing himself, why couldn't you have just kept your mouth shut until later, why?

"It will take some time to explain, so please calm down."

Obi Wan began with retelling the story of how they had arrived here on Polis Massa and how she had given birth. She gave birth to two children and just there after she died due to some mysterious reason which had been explained as a loss of the will to live. This much Padmé at least understood although slightly questioned seeing as she was very clearly alive, the next was something she was not prepared for…

"Luke had a heart defect that was not discovered until it was too late… he died a small while after you had died, I'm so sorry Padmé, there was nothing to be done." Obi Wan hung his head after saying that last line she understood that he was torn about it even though he did not show it, but what she herself felt was nothing close to the pain that he could be feeling. She had had two children, then she died and when she came back to life she only had one child… the tears began flowing and unlike before there was simply grief and sadness embedded in these tears. Why? Why did her child have to die? Was there something she had done?

Obi Wan could feel how Padmé began to blame herself, he simply took her hand and looked in her eyes…

"Do not blame yourself for any of it, never do that. The doctors told me that it would have been unavoidable, there was nothing that could've been done to prevent it even if they knew of it before the birth." He knew it would do nothing to alleviate how Padmé felt but he felt obligated to say it at least, releasing her hand he tried to put on a strong smile but it was clear to both of them that it was simply to hide the pain he himself felt.

Then another thought struck Padmé's mind, one that she had thought of earlier but had not asked…

"Where is Anakin?"

"Padmé…"

"Where is he, Obi Wan… tell me where he is."

"He is dead… he's dead"

Those words felt unreal to her… he is dead… no… that can't be true…

"But if you're here then why isn't he?" Those words cut deep into Obi Wan, why wasn't he here? Why had he died on Mustafar? Why?

"He died on Mustafar…" He stated simply, how else could he describe it… he had killed the father of her children, the person she loved… how could he tell her that he left him on that burning shore to suffer through such agonizing pain. Obi Wan realized something, if he felt that dying echo of Anakin now then he must've… he must have been lying there dying for several hours… This realization threw him over the edge… he felt the tears begin to make their way down his face.

"I will never be able to forgive myself as long as I live… I only hope you can…" Padmé was frozen solid, Obi Wan… Jedi Master… a member of the Jedi Council… was crying right in front of her, which could only mean one thing…

"You…" Before she even managed to say the rest before Obi Wan replied.

"I left him on a burning shore of lava, where he was consumed by flames." The lifeless look in his eyes told her everything… why? Why?

"He did not die in front of me, he suffered for a long time… I felt him… I felt his death before you came stumbling out of your room resurrected."

Padmé was simply staring at her friend whose face could only be described as lifeless horror, the horror of his own actions. She wanted someone to blame but who was before her right now was already destroyed by himself and his own blame for what he has done. There was only the universe to blame… only fate itself to blame for the gaping abyss in her heart.

A New Life

There are roads where none wish to travel, yet we do not determine our own path. More often than not that road is precisely where we end up.

Padmé looked out through the window of the ship into a tunnel of blue and black stripes… She had very often liked the sight of hyperspace, it was soothing in some way. But now it reminded her only of Anakin… he loved space, anything space related really. Ever since Obi Wan had told her that he was dead there had not been a single tear… not one, they had simply stopped at that moment. Even if she wanted to crumble together in a dark corner and bawl her eyes out nothing came, she saw her reflection briefly in the window, an expressionless mask was what it looked like. There was no life in her eyes, no curve in her lips, no coloration in her cheeks, simply a lifeless and pale imitation of what the person it belonged to used to be.

He must have suffered for hours… burning to a charred remnant of what he used to be… thinking of what had become of the person she had loved with every piece of her heart suffering such a fate did not change the expression on her face. Looking down to her daughter whom she was holding in her arms made only the tiniest of dents in the darkness that engulfed her heart.

A day had passed since she awoke, the doctors had insisted on keeping her but after a day of no change in her physical health they let her and Obi Wan leave. They had discussed rather briefly where they could go now that the Empire was undoubtedly hunting Obi Wan and Palpatine would most likely be after Leia… Palpatine… Sidious, the hatred in her mind that arose from the mere mention of that name was beyond anything she had ever felt.

"You took everything from me… my entire life is gone… monster." There was no change in tone, no great expression of anger, simply an endless black ocean of pain, sorrow and lifelessness.

They had chartered a course for Tatooine, they were going to ask Anakin's in-laws if they could stay with them for some time, at least until they found some place other, far from the empire and Sidious.

Beru had been more than distraught after seeing Padmé to say the least, it seemed clear that she did not only feel like a lifeless husk, she also looked at it. Obi Wan had done most of the talking and explaining. Owen had been rather apprehensive but Beru would have none of it from her husband, she practically forced them to stay on Tatooine.

That night was when Padmé's emotions finally snapped… there was no end to the tears… there was no reprieve for her only grief and sorrow. When they finally stopped she simply laid down on the bed which Beru had fixed up quickly after they had arrived. She laid there still as a rock…

Why couldn't I just have remained dead? What was the point in going on like this? A lifeless husk of her former self, if her former self had seen her now what would she think? What would she say? Then she heard the cry of a baby… her daughter… Leia…

She got out of the bed and walked over to where Leia was crying…

"Come now Leia, there's no need to cry, mom is here, you're safe little one." She said those words not only to reassure her daughter but also trying to reassure herself but to no avail. She had not looked into Leia's eyes until this moment… She saw it clear as day, the eyes of her Anakin, they were beautiful… picking up Leia she walked out into the open area…

She looked up into the sky where the stars shone brightly… starlight..

"You are my starlight, you know that little one." When she said this Leia seemed to calm down… "You have the eyes of your father Leia, be proud of that… he had the most beautiful eyes, and now they are yours… yours…" After hearing her mothers words Leia simply curled up tightly against Padmé's chest and fell asleep.

"I guess it's you and me now, can't forget Uncle Obi as well" She chuckled lightly at the nickname she had found for Obi Wan, but her concerned look soon returned.

"It's just us now… just us."

In this moment she vowed to herself that she would dedicate what was left of her life to her daughter and the downfall of the Empire, the thing that took her entire world from her.

"You will pay one fine day Sidious… one day you will, I promise you that."

Hello, Hell

There is no definitive version of Hell, yet we all seemingly understand and agree on what it is. Your hell and my hell can and never will be the same, yet they represent the same thing for both of us, Hell.

Obi Wan was up early, he needed to clear his head from everything. He saw two tombstones not far from the farm, he made his way over to them out of curiosity. Cliegg Lars and Shmi Lars… Shmi, that was the name of Anakin's mother, no? Kneeling down he felt a lingering echo in the force, it was of Anakin. He felt the sadness, the grief, the guilt.

"I'm sorry Anakin, I will forever be sorry." He hung his head in shame, he had utterly failed Anakin and himself. He looked over to the tombstone of Anakin's mother…

"Please forgive me for my failure, I failed your son, I swear that I will not let his daughter suffer the same fate." He had never met Shmi but he still felt the obligation to say it. After saying those words he walked some distance away from the graves and ignited his lightsaber, he proceeded to start a basic saber routine to warm up his muscles. He needed to be in the best shape possible to fulfill the oath he had just sworn. He may have beaten Anakin on Mustafar even though he was the better of the two but there would be new challenges to contend with unlike those which he had faced before…

He would be ready for them…

No matter what…

I will protect that which you left behind…

Brother…

Padmé awoke to the sound of Leia crying, was this going to be her life now, every morning awoken by a living alarm clock… Why are you so negative… stop it, she's your daughter you have to raise her now. Ignore the pain, ignore the grief, focus on her, focus on your promise… focus damn it.

It was still early in the morning and as far as she knew she was the only one up, although she heard something in the distance… a lightsaber. Still carrying Leia she rushed up the stairs towards the sound, hope filling her heart once more… But it was for nought… before she even made it out of the door she saw that it was not who she wanted it to be… he's gone Padmé, why can't you accept that… please if this is a nightmare, please let it end… I'm begging. She slumped down against the wall and felt the tears start to flow… why? Why? Just why? Why did this have to happen, everything had been so good, the war had almost been over, she was going to give birth to her and Anakin's child and they would've lived happily together. So why did everything turn into dust in her mouth, she simply held Leia close to her wishing with all of her being that this nightmare would end… but there came no end… this was her life now… ohh my starlight… you're the only thing left from my old life that hasn't been destroyed. She could not help but think of the fact that would haunt not only her but also Leia in the future… Luke… had it not been enough that she had lost everything, she had to lose her child on top of it all, she had had twins yet would never be allowed to experience it. She had been so excited to tell Anakin the news… now she could only look back at that memory with heart wrenching grief at what that happiness would become.

"Why Anakin? It never had to be this way… you could've left the order… we could've left everything behind, it wouldn't matter where we went, it only would have mattered that we were together…" She felt the pain in her heart and soul clear as day, she had to be strong, but how could she be? How could she with this immense pain, just how? How, damn it?

Suddenly she felt one of her fingers get squeezed, looking down at her daughter she saw that Leia was grabbing one of her fingers whilst silently crying… just like Padmé was, almost as if she felt the pain as well…

"Come now Leia, there is no need to cry, mom is just having a bad day, don't let me spoil your first week alive." Mustering all the strength she had she tried her hardest to sound happy and strong, yet it was undeniable that one could still hear the pain and sadness that Padmé was trying to deal with.

One step at a time Padmé… one step at a time, that's how you'll get through this. Don't get stuck in the past, don't run towards the future… just one step at a time, that you can manage, can't you? You have to… for the sake of Leia, for the sake of what Anakin left behind.

An Interesting Day

We do not realize the importance of a decision or action until we have seen the effect.

Vader sat in his workshop tinkering with some droidparts, he was contemplating the events of the day. It had been a very productive day in all, his master was pleased, he was pleased and his new apprentice was as well. Things were seemingly looking up for him… looking up? Was he trying to delude himself… he was never going to reach the heights he had once had in his life. In terms of power he could most likely surpass his former self, but all the rest… never… He could never, never again reach that height… without her it was impossible.

Sleep was something that still eluded him, he had grown more and more accustomed to the bizarre concept of not sleeping. He had particularly liked sleeping… sleeping… with Padmé…

"Get your head back on task Vader, you've gotta get this droid to be able to keep up with A'parr." He had still not made a new lightsaber so the task of lightsaber training would have to be handled by this training droid. He had not yet picked a new name for her but it was also fitting seeing as she had not fully turned from the light, but she would… in time. Her unique style of lightsaber combat required the droid to be fine tuned in Vader's opinion, everything was going to fall into place… he was certain about that at least.

There was also another matter that he was contemplating over… while Naboo was a perfect fit for him, it was not one that would help A'parr embrace the darkside. Naboo simply did not have the desired effect, his mind had wandered around his mental map of the galaxy in search of a fitting planet. Mustafar… a planet which he could still draw immense emotions from but would also have the desired effect on his apprentice, lava and brimstone did give off a particular feeling after all. Another thing to keep note of, he really should get an assistant or something, maybe a notebook to keep track of everything. The ideas circling his head were at least to the Sith lord very comical, the right hand of the galactic Emperor, Darth Vader… carrying around a notebook… the thought actually made him chuckle due to its absurdity. At least some part of his sense of humor was still intact which did give the man a feeling of happiness…

Yet just like everything in his life currently it was quickly stamped out by the crushing weight of all the pain that the mere thought of happiness brought about…

Angel mine… please… if you can hear my pleas…

Please answer them…

I'm begging…

Please…