Chapter 11: Explanations

The next morning, Minnie had convinced Charlotte to be checked out by Faith, who confirmed what Charlotte had expected. She was pregnant.

What would normally be such happy news just caused Charlotte to, as she had confessed the night before to Minnie, feel numb. She wasn't happy. She wasn't sad. She just could not feel anything at the moment. But what she did know. Charlotte owed someone incredibly special to her an explanation for her behaviors the night before.

Nathan had seen Faith come and leave from Charlotte's house that morning. A world of dread settling into his chest.

Was Charlotte sick? Or worse. Dying?

As much as he wanted to know Charlotte was okay, he knew that he needed to take a walk. Clear his head. He started out down the path towards town before, at the last minute, deciding to continue straight until the next thing he knew he had arrived at the log that lay across the stream. One of their secret fishing spots.

The day was overcast, cloudy and grey. The storm from the night before had delivered some much-needed rain to Hope Valley, but even this far out of town the land was already dry and parched. The air was heavy and humid, so Nathan decided to take off his boots and socks, roll up his pant legs, and sit on the log, similar to how he and Allie had found Charlotte the first Saturday she was in town.

Nathan was not sure how long he stayed in that spot, just taking in the sights and sounds around him. Feeling the water of the stream push past his ankles carrying his thoughts and anxiety further down the stream. But as the sun fell further to the west, darkening the landscape, he knew it was time to return to reality. Whatever that may look like now.

When Nathan arrived back at his house, he realized a note had been attached to his front door. The swirling font on the paper was already all too familiar to him. He picked up the envelope, then took a moment to look over at Charlotte's house before entering his own and shutting the door.

He knew what would be contained in this letter would take all his strength and determination to get through. Turning the note over in his hands he opened it and pulled the pages from the envelope's grasp.

Nathan,

Weeks ago, you told me that I didn't have to explain it to you. But I feel like this is the least I can do after what happened last night. I wish I was strong enough to tell you this all in person, but I'm not. I hope you can accept this letter instead. Please know I am not telling you this because you are the local constable, but rather that you are my friend. A very dear friend.

I was engaged, Nathan. To a man named Beck McEntire. He was the local sheriff in the town I moved to for my first teaching assignment out of college. For a girl who was always reading novels of grand gestures and love, he seemed right out of a storybook. My own Prince Charming. Tall, dark, and handsome. Doting on my every wish. Taking me on extravagant dates. Giving store-bought flowers and opulent presents. Candlelit dinners. The works.

My parents had just passed away when I met Beck and it felt good to have someone again. I fell hard Nathan. Without a single reservation. It wasn't until after Beck proposed did I start to feel like something was "off". He was drinking, spending more late nights at the saloon, and hanging out with the wrong crowd. I finally realized he had turned against the town and people with his illegal business ventures. Instead choosing money and prominence in groups that he should not be associated with.

I tried to talk to Beck about it months ago. Telling him that was a life that I did not want to be a part of. How could he knowingly hurt our neighbors and friends in that way? He said I was naïve. Did I really think that a small-town law man would make enough money to take me on all those fancy dates and buy the gifts I had come so accustomed to receiving including my engagement ring? I said I never asked for all that. Especially at the cost of him turning against everything he had sworn to protect. That was the first night he hit me. I was too shocked to know what to do and I felt guilty. Was I really the reason he felt the need to be a part of this gang?

No matter what the reason was, I realized I could not stay. The man I fell in love with was no longer the man I was engaged to. I saw an advertisement in the paper for a town called Hope Valley who was needing a teacher for their summer program and possibly school year. I just needed to be credentialed to teach blind students. I immediately sent in my application. When I was selected as a finalist for the position, I snuck away to Fort MacLeod in order to interview with Mr. Landis. He ended up giving me the job that day and we planned for my journey to Hope Valley.

The night before I was scheduled to leave, I had packed everything that I could fit into my two bags and trunk. I was able to wrangle them to the stagecoach station and hide them in the corner of an alley until the next morning. I knew that Beck had been at the saloon for hours at that point and would not be home until the wee hours of the morning, so I left him a letter explaining how I couldn't be with him anymore and that I was going away. I said the wedding was off and not to come after me. I left the note at his house with the engagement ring and went back home.

Hours later, Beck was at my door, beating his fist against it demanding to talk. When I did not immediately open it, he came in anyway. He was drunk. The drunkest I had ever seen him. He yelled at me and grabbed my arms, telling me how stupid I was for thinking I could leave him. He had connections and wherever I went. Whoever I was with. He would find me. It was then that he attacked me. Beck wanted to show he could have power and control over me like he did with the rest of the town. I tried to fight, scream, and plead with him, the man that I used to love. And the man who I thought loved me. But it wasn't any use.

He left then. To go back to his house and pass out for the night. I knew that despite everything he said, if I did not leave now, I wouldn't be able to leave at all. There was a tight window of execution for the plan to work. I knew that when Beck was drinking so much, he didn't usually wake until about noon the next morning and by that time I would be hours away, which I was.

I got on the stagecoach with my few belongings early the next morning. I didn't take the most direct route here, instead zig zagging my way across the province trying to cover my trail, hence why I was late for the first day of summer classes. At each major town along the way I would get off and repurchase a new ticket using a different name in the hopes that if Beck was following, he would be thrown off my trail and not find me.

I thought it had worked until Mr. Yost delivered a letter yesterday. You see, about a week after I arrived in Hope Valley, I decided I needed to send a letter to my friend Megan who lives back east with her husband Matt. I told them I had called off the wedding to Beck and had received a new teaching position which allowed me to move to Hope Valley. Matt wrote back saying that Beck had reached out to them and was searching for me. The letter Matt sent to warn about Beck had been lost in the mercantile until yesterday. It was dated July 22nd. I just knew that if Beck had been searching that long for me, he could be anywhere by now, including Hope Valley. I felt the need to run again. I could not have him finding me. Or worse. Hurting the people I've come to care so much about here.

That is why when you came up behind me last night I panicked. I thought Beck had found me and it was too late. When I finally realized it was you, I couldn't face it Nathan. I could not show you my shame and hurt I had been carrying for the past months. You don't need that burden.

And that leads me to my final point. I am sure you saw Faith come by this morning. She confirmed what I have suspected and known for weeks now. I am pregnant. With Beck's child. I have always dreamed that one day I would become a mother, but I'll be honest this wasn't how I expected it to happen. This influx of emotions has me so confused and overwhelmed.

The one thing I know for certain is this. This child should not be blamed for the events that led to its conception. Just like I cannot be blamed either. The thought of becoming a single parent is one that petrifies me. I never thought I would be doing it alone.

Nathan, I want you to know. It is because of YOU that I know I can do this. I can be a single mom. I look at how you have so selflessly raised Allie, your daughter, to become such a wonderful woman. It will not be easy. I know there will be a lot of heartache and tears, but I also believe there will be many happy days filled with joy as well.

Those are the days I will live for. Those will be the days I cherish.

Your Friend,

Charlotte

A wet drop spread across the page Nathan held in his hands.

When had he started crying?

Nathan had been right in his assumptions of Charlotte's past but knowing the details didn't make the truth any easier to hear. Charlotte, his dear Charlotte, had been through so much pain and heartache. All her fears and walls made sense now. The distance she put between them. Charlotte's ex-fiancé was a lawman who broke into her house late at night and attacked her.

But slowly, in Charlotte's summer here in Hope Valley, she seemed to be moving past those concerns. Opening up. Finding joy not only in her teachings, but dare he say it, finding joy with Allie and him?

But Nathan's careless behavior last night had brought all her fears right back to the surface. Making Charlotte relive the night of her attack and face the truth about her future.

Charlotte was pregnant.

With that admission, it became clear to Nathan what he needed to do to set everything in his world right again.