Chapter 30- New Hope
The weight of Gabe's information about McEntire threatened to seize control of Nathan's world, shattering it into a million pieces.
The love that he felt for Charlotte terrified him. It terrified him because of what he was willing to do to protect that love.
Nathan had read numerous official reports over the past few years about the growth of the Schneider gang and their various business dealings. Cattle rustling, extortion, theft, brothels, illegal casinos, dealing narcotics, and a string of unproven murders. They did it all.
And Beck McEntire was a part of it.
Nathan could tell Gabe was watching him on their silent walk across town. Analyzing his friend's reaction to the news. Nathan tried to straighten his spine and pull back his shoulders, willing his body to disguise the unease he was feeling. His stomach was in knots and his heart whirled at a rapid pace.
That was until Charlotte's cheerful laughter drifted to Nathan on a summer breeze as they neared the New Hope Orphanage. The sound instantly lifted his spirits and eased his troubled mind. It was like a lighthouse beacon calling to him through the stormy seas of his soul. Guiding him safely into the harbor of her loving presence. Nathan needed to see Charlotte. To be closer to her. Without her to stabilize his mind and heart, Nathan felt adrift. Confused. Lost.
Upon rounding the corner of the orphanage, Nathan discovered the source of Charlotte's giggles. She and the children, along with Allie, Lee, and Rosemary had partaken in a competitive game of tag. Nathan's mood instantly lifted at the sight before him as his eyes followed Charlotte's movements around the backyard. Watching as she gracefully shifted and twirled inches away from the outstretched arms of one of the older boys, before taking off in a sprint through the grass. Charlotte's brunette locks flying behind her in the breeze. Moving and dancing like the waves of an ocean. When she stopped and turned suddenly to see if the boy had followed her across the field, a wisp of curls fell across the side of her face. Sticking to the sweat of her cheek and lip until she reached up to tuck it back into place.
In the motion her eyes had found Nathan's. Charlotte smiled at the sight of him coming towards her across the field. Her chest rising and falling heavily with the exertion of the game.
Nathan's heart leapt at that moment. He could feel it. He could feel the love that filled his entire body. The kind that made his toes curl and the kind of love that circulated through every vein. The kind of love that made him want to scream all his worries and fears out so they had no way of finding their way back into his soul. The kind that took his breath away just by seeing the look Charlotte was giving him now. By hearing her voice that always whispered kindness and sweet promises.
Nathan just wished that Charlotte could feel it too.
The reasons they had been brought together was no accident. They had been two souls, lost and searching for a home. Finally finding it in one another. Finding friendship, comfort, and safety in the relationship they were building.
Nathan remembered his vision of the home he first dreamt of the day he watched Charlotte and Little Jack at the Christmas festival. It was so eerily similar to the vision in front of him now. He wanted this. Charlotte, their children, their friends, the big house, the green fields, the laughter and happiness.
Whatever struggles he would have to face in order to get his family to that place, was a risk Nathan was willing to take.
As Nathan drew closer, he could see Charlotte's eyes turn sparkly with mischief moments before he felt a hand touch his arm.
"Tag! You're it, Mountie Nathan!" Vincent called out behind him as he started to scamper away from Nathan.
Nathan was taken aback. Since when did he get involved in this?
Charlotte's giggles again shot to him across the expanse of the field.
"Oh, you think this is funny, do you?" Nathan questioned as his pace quickened in the direction of Charlotte.
Charlotte's eyes grew big then. No doubt thoughts of her past pushing their way forward. Her reaction caused Nathan to pull up and pause his advance. He saw Charlotte close her eyes and take a deep breath. When she opened her eyes, it was no longer fear Nathan saw in their glittering grey color, but rather playfulness.
"Come and get me constable. If you can," Charlotte challenged as she winked in Nathan's direction a split second before she took off in the direction of the livestock shed at the edge of the property.
Charlotte was fast, but Nathan's long legs gave him the advantage. By the time she rounded the corner to the backside of the barn, Nathan's arms had wrapped around Charlotte's middle, stopping her advance and pulling her body back towards his chest.
How he wanted to just keep her there. Spooning her body into his. Arms wrapped protectively around Charlotte's stomach as his nose would nuzzle into the waves of her long hair, leading his lips to trail a path down her glistening neck.
But in order to keep the demons of Charlotte's past at bay, Nathan chose to keep their touches light. Moving his hands instead to tickle her sides.
Laughter sprang forth from Charlotte as she hunched and squirmed in his grasp.
"Nathan!" she squealed breathlessly against him.
Finally, Nathan's onslaught lightened. His fingers coming to rest on Charlotte's waist, turning her gently to face him. His pulse quickening as she again reached her hands forward to take hold of Nathan's suspenders. Using them to pull his body closer to hers. Their hips brushing against one another as Charlotte leaned back slightly to look up at Nathan. At this angle, her eyes were barely visible to him under her thick lashes. A light, dewy perspiration coated her freckled skin.
Nathan removed his hands from Charlotte's waist and brought them instead to cup either side of her face. His fingers threading into the tangled strands of her hair as his thumbs brushed against Charlotte's rosy cheekbones. He shifted his hands slightly, causing Charlotte's head to tip back a little farther as Nathan began to bring his lips forward.
Clang. Ka Clang. Clang.
"Dinner's ready! Come and get it!" Ms. Eleanor Winters' voice called out as she finished ringing the triangle dinner bell from the back steps of the kitchen door.
It was Charlotte's turn to groan at the interruption this time, which caused a laugh to escape Nathan.
Was this going to happen every time he wanted to kiss Charlotte Thompson?
"Oh! There you two are!" Mary Louise's voice came from behind Nathan, causing him and Charlotte to turn towards the little girl. "Ms. Eleanor sent me to tell you that dinner is ready."
"Yes, we heard Mary Louise, but thank you for coming to get us. We are right behind you," Charlotte gently replied. Noting that her voice was unusually low and husky with the remnant emotion of her recent interactions with Nathan.
"Good! Because Ms. Lillian and Ms. Grace said we can't eat until our guests have all been served. We are having fried chicken tonight and I couldn't bear the thought of having to wait too long to eat it!"
The little girl's frankness produced a genuine laugh from Nathan and Charlotte as they, hand in hand, followed Mary Louise back to the house.
"I appreciate your help in cleaning up the dishes," Eleanor thanked Charlotte as the two stood side by side at the sink in the orphanage kitchen.
"Not a problem. I am happy to do my part. I remember how much work it is to feed so many hungry mouths," Charlotte responded as she dried the plate Eleanor handed to her.
"Oh, you do?"
"I grew up on a ranch. My dad was the foreman, and my mom made all the meals for the cowboys. I learned how to cook from her by helping prepare and clean up the meals from an early age."
Rosemary, Lee, Lillian, and Grace were already in the parlor with the children setting up for what Rosemary had called a theatrical extravaganza. Nathan had offered to help put away the dishes Charlotte was drying, but when Eleanor told him she and Charlotte could handle the task, he and Gabe excused themselves to the front porch.
This case they were discussing seemed to make Nathan anxious. Charlotte could clearly see the tension it caused whenever the subject had been brought up today. Nathan's jaw would clench and the muscles in his hand would involuntarily flex. That's why when Charlotte saw Nathan and Gabe walking into the backyard earlier, she wanted to do something to lighten the weight that seemed to be put on Nathan's shoulders. Charlotte wanted to cheer him up. To take his mind off whatever was troubling him.
Never did she think that playing a game of tag would lead to their intimate moment behind the shed. Where Charlotte had pulled Nathan into her body, using his suspenders to guide him to what she desired. Nathan had accepted her invitation, weaving his long fingers into her hair and tilting her face to allow him better access for the kiss.
A flush to come across her cheeks at the memory. Charlotte turned to put some dishes away in order to hide her blush from Ms. Winters.
"Your Nathan Grant is a mighty fine young man," Eleanor began with a twinkle in her eyes.
"Nathan's not my…" Charlotte began, before noting Eleanor's expression that told Charlotte she would not be able to fool this woman about her feelings for Nathan. Charlotte paused and looked around, seeing that there was no one else in the room, she decided to take advantage of the comfortable presence of this older woman who reminded Charlotte so much of her mom.
"You're right," Charlotte corrected herself. "He is a wonderful man. I am so incredibly blessed that the Grants came into my life. When I met Nathan and Allie, just their slow, consistent presence in my life all of a sudden turned into… this. And all at once, before I knew it was happening, my world began to change."
"You're in love."
Charlotte thought her jaw dropped to the floor.
Love?
Eleanor's smile grew in front of Charlotte. She knew what Charlotte and Nathan shared was exactly that big, lifetime love that people read about in storybooks. And she was going to help be the one that made Charlotte realize what a gift she and Nathan had together.
"Yes, sweetheart. What you all have. Is love of the grandest kind. One that isn't just about feeling butterflies all the time. But rather a love that is calm. A love that is comfortable. A love that I imagine you can sit in complete silence with for the rest of your lives and it would mean more than a thousand words with anyone else."
Charlotte's mind raced with what Eleanor was describing. Did she really love Nathan? Charlotte knew she cared for him deeply, but love? Head over heels, knock you senseless, true love? After what Charlotte had experienced in her past, she was not even sure if she was capable of that kind of love. Giving or receiving it.
"Ms. Charlotte. Ms. Eleanor." Christian said as he entered the kitchen. "I've been sent to escort you both to the theatrical extravaganza!"
Charlotte and Eleanor laughed heartily at the way Christian mimicked Rosemary's actions, leaning back and twisting his hand in a very animated way when describing the play they were about to act out. Both women hooked an arm through Christian's, allowing the young boy to escort the duo into the other room. Charlotte saw that Sophia had been given the similar task of collecting Nathan and Gabe from the front porch. The young girl pulled the two men further into the house and led them to their assigned seats.
Charlotte again noted the tension in Nathan's body. She smiled at him as he walked over to take a seat next to her on the couch. As much as he tried, Nathan could not seem to bring the muscles of his face to smile in return. Instead, he leaned forward and placed another gentle kiss on Charlotte's forehead, as he tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear.
Charlotte closed her eyes, letting the feeling of Nathan's closeness ease her own worried soul. When she opened them again, Nathan was staring down at her. Seeming to analyze every minute detail of her face. As if trying to engrain the tender moment between them to memory.
Nathan had tried to again bury his worries about McEntire before he and Gabe rejoined the rest of the group to watch the children's play. But he knew Charlotte again sensed something was off. She had sat closer than normal to him, holding his hand in her own throughout the entire production. Gently rubbing her fingers back and forth across his knuckles trying to release the pressure and tension that had found their way into every muscle of Nathan's body.
He had tried to follow the other's leads of when to laugh or clap during the performance, because no matter what, he could not focus on what was happening in the play. His mind was in another world. A world that revolved around the arrest of Beck McEntire.
At one point, Charlotte gently nudged his shoulder with her own, causing Nathan's attention to turn to her. Charlotte smiled and then tilted her head across the room. Nathan's gaze followed to where she had directed and saw Lee meticulously working to help Fred into his costume. The little boy staring at Lee with such admiration, Nathan could not help but smile and for a moment remember one of the most important reasons they had come to Brookfield and New Hope.
After the play, Nathan walked Gabe out. They again stood at the base of the front porch for a while, discussing in hushed tones their next steps for the arrest of McEntire.
As they finished up their planning and Gabe was getting ready for his short walk back to town, he felt the need to say, "Nathan, let's put this discussion about McEntire to rest for now. We have an outline of what we need to do. Let's just enjoy the next few days on the cattle drive and not worry about the future and what it may bring. Be present with your girls. They need you here with them. As Nathan. Not Constable Grant."
Nathan just nodded his head. Gabe was right. They had a plan for McEntire, it was time that he put his revenge for the actions brought on Charlotte to rest for the time being and just enjoy these days with his family and their friends.
"Thanks Gabe. For everything."
"Goodnight, Nathan. See you in the morning."