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RonaldM40196867: Is Berserk too grim... Well, in Warhammer the Daemonculaba is a thing. So, it's no worse than Warhammer really. I like it as it is.


After the assassination, the Band of the Hawk went out on campaign again. This time they faced the "Blue whale ultra heavy armored fierce assault annihilation knight corps". A ludicrously long name, for a particularly arrogant group of knights.

Casca went into the battle with a fever, and fell off a cliff. Guts had jumped after her and tried to take care of her. When she woke up, she started throwing things at him. Eventually she calmed down, and they talked. Guts finally learned what Casca's problem with him was, and she told him about her past.

Eventually they learned the Blue Whale Knights were trying to track them down and they tried to sneak back to camp in the middle of the night.

However, they ended up being found and cornered by three hundred men. Basically everything that was left of the Blue Whale Knights after the battle. Their commander knew of Guts and his reputation and didn't want to take any chances so he had brought everything he reasonably could to catch or kill him and Casca.

Guts ended up slaying all three hundred men and barely survived.

Then the King would go on to order the Band of the Hawk to capture the Fortress of Doldrey which was being occupied by Tudor's strongest knight corps. The Holy Purple Rhino Knights.

Guts helped plan out the tactics and strategies for the engagement, and played his part. They triumphed, of course.

When they finally returned from their campaign, a banquet was held in their honor.

Everyone in the Hawks had to dress up in fancy clothing to appease the nobles. Particularly Guts and Griffith.

Guts' outfit was particularly expensive. Not because it was more fancy than Griffith's or anything like that, but specifically because it took so much more material to cover his immense bulk.

"Oh! Look, it's Lord Griffith and Baron Guts!"

"A troupe from the Band of the Hawk."

"They were the leads in this victory."

"They're Midland's guardian deities."

The nobles spoke as Griffith, Guts, Casca, Pippin, Judeau, Corkus, and Rickert entered the banquet hall. Guts was side by side with Griffith. Though he towered above him in height, Griffith had just as much of a presence in that hall as Guts. All eyes were divided equally between the two.

"Aha, so this is where all the tax money from the masses ends up." Judeau commented.

"Talk about showy…" Guts muttered under his breath, being careful no one else could hear him.

"This is so embarrassing…" Rickert commented.

"C'mon, stick your chest out! They know if you aren't sure of yourselves!" Corkus stated, clearly enjoying himself. "You know what, though… It feels like we've finally made it here."

"But you're right, we really have. To be standing here in a kind of place I've only heard of in fairy tales… It's like I'm dreaming or something." Rickert agreed. "If I hadn't met up with the Hawks… With Griffith… I never would've even thought of a dream like this. Being in a big castle hall surrounded by nobility."

"Yeah, you said it." Judeau agreed.

Guts looked at Griffith. Thinking about what was to come.

"Lord Griffith!" A small horde of excited noble women swarmed Griffith.

"Welcome home!"

"Thank goodness you're safe!"

"I was so worried!"

"They say the Band of the Hawk was actively involved again, do tell me more."

"Would you dance with me later on?"

"Me as well, please!"

Griffith took all of this in stride and managed to keep himself calm and collected. "Aren't tales of battle rather boring for ladies?"

"Not at all. They're stimulating!"

"Oh, yes."

"He's a natural." Judeau observed.

"Amazing." Rickert nodded.

"Hnnn! Send at least one this way!" Corkus pleaded.

It seemed his wish would be granted as more noble women came.

"You're the Band of the Hawk's commanders. We want to hear your war stories."

"You must be very strong!"

Corkus smiled. "Wellll, you're right, actually."

More noble women surrounded Guts.

"Baron Guts! You're the one who beat General Boscogn in single combat, right?"

Guts nodded. "Yeah."

"Wow! And General Boscogn was world renowned for being such a hero!"

"I heard you defeated three hundred enemies by yourself. You really did that?"

"Yeah…"

"I heard you fought a demon who could level mountains! Is that true?"

"Nosferatu Zodd, and it was one fortress, not a mountain." Guts corrected. Though he supposed he wouldn't be surprised to learn Zodd could level mountains…

"Unbelievable! Are you the strongest in the Band of the Hawk? Oh, but of course you are… Look at how big you are! I suppose a more fair question would be, who's the best commander in the Hawks? You or Lord Griffith?"

"Griffith, no question." Guts answered automatically. Technically, they were about tied as strategists, tacticians, and logisticians, essentially all key areas of leading armies, but Griffith had significantly more charisma than Guts. That was an incredibly important quality for a leader. So Griffith was definitively the superior commander, at least as far as Guts was concerned.

After a moment longer, he managed to find an opportunity to slip away. "You guys take it from here." Guts told the others.

"Yeah, leave it to us!" Corkus called after him

Guts walked over to a wall and leaned against it. He would have sat down on a chair but he was concerned he might break it under his weight. "Give me a freakin' break…" He muttered to himself.

Looking around he saw Casca talking to some noblemen.

Then she spotted him and started marching over to him.

She grabbed him by the wrist and started dragging him with her.

"Hey! Wait! What the—" He objected.

"Play along!" Casca demanded.

"Pushy broad…! Eh?"

"They refused to leave me alone. Pretend you're with me for a bit." She requested. "I swear! When it comes to those aristocratic prodigal sons, a female warrior must be a rarity! Treating me like I'm some exotic beast!"

Guts looked at her.

She noticed. "What's with you?"

"Huh… Didn't know you were into… Oof!"

Casca cut him off by punching him in the stomach. It didn't really hurt him but it certainly caught him off guard.

"Normal women don't just punch people!"

"Well, I can't exactly reach your face to slap you, now can I, you tall bastard? Come on! This is embarrassing."

"S'your fault y'know."

Casca led Guts outside onto a balcony. "Whew! I'm no good at this. I'm much more comfortable swinging a sword." Casca groaned.

"You said it." Guts agreed. "What the heck happened to you, though? What made Big Sis Casca the Demon go fluttering around like this?"

"Cut the 'demon'." Casca commented. "I only dress like a man because it's easier to move around! It's not like I do it for kicks! But I guess I shouldn't try things I'm not used to. Revealing clothes like this makes me feel like I'll catch a cold. Thinking about it, it's been years since I last wore a skirt… I'm so much more muscular now… Does it look weird, you think?"

Guts smiled at her and shook his head. "Nah, not a bit. You look pretty good."

"Really?"

Guts nodded. "Yeah, you look a lot better than those noble girls flocking around Griffith."

He leaned down and asked, "How 'bout it? Why not ask him for a dance?"

"N-no way. I couldn't. I've only ever danced at my village festival when I was a child… I'd probably step on his feet… But what happened that changed your attitude? You've never shown your face in a place like this unless Griffith dragged you along."

Guts looked up at the night sky. The moon was half full. The ugly pinkish purple splotch was very plainly visible that night… He despised that purple spot. It was the one and only thing he well and truly hated about the night sky… He still felt that pull towards the stars. Like a voice calling out to him. And yet he still had no voice with which to shout back at it.

"I thought I'd see it for myself…"

"Huh…?" Casca asked, not understanding.

"Everything Griffith, myself, and everyone else has done… These past three years since I met you all… All these things he's managed to get so far… And all he's going to try to get from here on out… I thought I'd come see it with my own eyes."

"Guts…" Casca muttered. "So… You're really serious? No matter what?"

There was a commotion inside.

"Long live his majesty, the King!"

"The sponsors appear." Casca stated.

"You go on ahead. I'm gonna enjoy the air a bit more. Can't stand listening to the King drone on."

Casca stared at him for a moment. "Don't be long." She told him.

"You got it." He said, leaning back on the railing.

As Casca started walking away Guts spoke up, "Hang on."

"Eh?"

Guts paused as if considering something. "Nah. Never mind."

Casca turned and continued walking inside.

'There's one more reason I showed up tonight… She and the rest of the Hawks don't have a clue what's in the works here tonight… Ain't that a little cruel, Griffith?'

The king made his announcements. A special envoy from tudor had brought word that an armistice agreement had been signed with Midland. It was announced that at the military award ceremony in two days, due to their success in capturing the Fortress of Doldrey the Band of the Hawk was given the White Title, the highest ennoblement of Midland's army. Being renamed, the White Phoenix Knights. Furthermore, all of the current unit commanders were going to be knighted and become nobles.

Guts knew what was coming and watched the proceedings from where he was outside. When the announcements were over he snuck away.

Guts headed to the most likely path that the servant who thought he poisoned Griffith's drink would take and intercepted him. The servant came riding on horseback and Guts beheaded him with a single strike.

With that loose end taken care of, he moved again.

As he neared his next destination, he saw a building burning in the distance. Everything was going according to plan.

He found the scum Griffith had hired to kidnap Minister Foss' daughter. She'd been returned by now, and they hadn't harmed a hair on her head, as per Griffith's orders. But they were still an unacceptable loose end and their words as they huddled together scheming proved it.

"Hehehe… That was simple."

"Not to mention profitable. Hope he hires us again."

"C'mon, if he tries to cut ties with us we'll just use this kidnapping against him."

Guts stepped into view, blocking their path.

The scum drew their weapons. "Wh-what the fuck! A god damn giant!"

Guts drew his sword and quickly slew them all.

"Looks like it's over." Griffith observed as he approached.

"Yeah…" Guts agreed, lowering his hood. "That takes care of it. All of it." He then knelt down and took the bag of coins Griffith had given them. He tossed it up and caught it.

"The money's theirs by right. They did the work to earn it. Leave it with them." Griffith told him.

Guts dropped the bag of coins back on the chest of one of the corpses. "Money's the key to all doors? Hell of a waste…" Guts stood back up and looked down towards the bridge where Minister Foss was having a little reunion with his daughter. "Is it safe to let the little bald guy go?"

"Yeah. I think he's learned today's lesson. I can't predict the future, but probably." Griffith told him.

Guts gave him a skeptical look. "Whadda ya mean, 'probably'?"

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it."

Guts shrugged. "But, y'know, the castle's gonna be upset again by all this. This one night's seen a mountain of corpses with the Queen on top. Thankfully, not one person who could name you is still around. I doubt anyone'd ever suspect someone who nearly died pulling it off."

"Does it seem cruel?" Griffith inquired.

"Huh?" Guts looked at him, confused.

"I involved you in this filthy scheme and I didn't even get my hands dirty… Do you… think I'm cruel?"

Guts hesitated for a moment before smiling. "Idiot! What kinda question is that for the guy who killed three hundred men?! Ain't this part of the path of your dream? You believe that, don't you? So what's with this crap? Now of all times…"

Griffith looked down at the ground with a gentle smile. "You're right."

Guts slapped him on the back, surprising him. "Let's head back! Dead men don't walk around. You gotta get back quickly so Casca and the others'll stop worryin'."

As the two of them started walking back, Guts said, "You were dead, so you probably don't know."

"Eh?"

"Casca showed up at the celebration wearin' a dress."

"Really?!"

"It's quite a sight to see…"

The two of them returned to the castle.

As soon as they stepped inside, Casca and the others practically swarmed Griffith. Happy to see that he was alive.

In the coming days, a funeral was held for the Queen.

The enigmatic deaths of the Queen and the conservative ministers, along with the attempted assassination of Count Griffith on the same night fell into the realm of whispered rumor. It was said that it had been the work of Tudor hardliners or possibly an assassin from a third country seeking to obstruct the Midland Tudor armistice agreement.

The following day, the remains of several individuals thought possibly to be connected to the incidents were discovered outside Windham Castle. But not enough clues were ever found to explain the facts of the situation. The truth vanished into darkness.

A month later, Guts gathered his few belongings, leaving behind only the hilt of the sword that broke in his fight with Nosferatu Zodd and his armor. He had kept the hilt as a reminder of that fight. Now he was leaving the hilt and his armor so the Band of the Hawk would have mementos to remember him by.

He was leaving. Going off to work on finding a cure for the poison and finding a dream of his own to pursue, so he could one day be a man Griffith could truly consider a friend.

Carrying a sack with his clothes over his shoulder and with his sword on his back, he left.

As he trudged through the cold wind and snow, he paused as a voice called out to him. "GUTS!"

He looked and saw Casca, definitely not dressed for the cold, standing behind him.

"Guts… You… Are you… leaving? Is that it?" She asked him.

Guts stared at her in silence. They both already knew the answer to that question.

"W… Wait a minute… I was on bad terms with you for a long time… But we're comrades who've braved death together. All the trouble the Band of the Hawk has gone through is starting to pay off… It all starts here, right? Knowing that… At a time like this…"

"I've… already made up my mind about it."

"But…!" Casca objected.

"I can't." Guts declared firmly. "I can't… remain buried in his dream like this… I hope… I hope things go well with you and Griffith."

"Hey." Another voice called out.

They both looked and saw Judaeu and Corkus.

"Corkus, Judeau…" Casca muttered.

Judeau patted Casca's shoulder and approached Guts. "Come talk with us awhile."

Judeau and Corkus lead Guts away. He looked back at Casca one last time.

Casca turned and started running.

Corkus and Judeau brough Guts to a bar.

"Hey, look at 'em! It's the Hawk Commanders!"

"Hey, hey fellas!" Corkus laughed.

"Give it a rest, Corkus." Judeau said.

Guts sat there in silence.

"Hey sweet thing!" Corkus called out to an attractive serving wench.

"But why though? I mean now all of a sudden…" Judeau asked.

"It ain't sudden. I decided before our last dispatch." Guts told him

"Are you dissatisfied or something?" Judeau inquired as Corkus kept trying to seduce the waiter.

"Dissatisfied? I've got no reason to be." Guts shook his head. "The Hawks're different from regular bands. They gave me, a wandering mercenary who only knew how to fight, my first taste of comradery…"

"That's not something the old you would've said."

"These three years really have been fun. It feels like… It's been a big festival or somethin' all this time. No way I'm dissatisfied."

"Then why in the world… Corkus, do you mind?" Judeau paused to chastise Corkus who was still flirting with the wench.

"Shut it!" Corkus snapped back. "I'm Sir Corkus, unit commander in the Band of the Hawk! What's wrong with me trying my hand at a girl or two in a bar?!" Corkus put his feet on the table and leaned back. "Any bar or inn in town! You say you're a hawk commander at any shop in Windham and it's a free ride! If you walk down the street, kids and women swarm you! And no wonder! We're the heroes of the kingdom! To top it off, we're gonna be joinin' the nobles pretty soon! Then it's smooth sailin' livin' in the court! So long to those musty barracks! If things go well, we could be castle lords!"

Guts listened to the rant unperturbed.

"Normally we could never have gotten any of this! Sure, you're a noble now, but you used to be a commoner too and commoners like us couldn't even dream of it! But we got it! I can't tell ya how many blood-stained memories I have of enemy swords nearly takin' my head off! With one foot planted in the grave! We finally made it…! And you wanna go and throw all that away… Just like you were throwin' off old clothes… You are unbelievably thick! What are you, screwed in the head?"

"Corkus…" said Judeau.

"Feh! A guy like you who only knows how to kill people wouldn't be able to dance with ladies at parties anyway, right?! You can swing a sword, but you can't swing a woman, huh?!"

"It's like you said." Guts muttered. "I can't… do anything but swing my sword. When I first killed a man, I was a kid who didn't know right from left. I haven't learned much off the battlefield since then… and I haven't tried to learn. Killing to survive… There was nothing else I could do. That was everything… But… it was alright… If one person… anyone… had looked my way…"

Guts paused for a moment before continuing. "But wandering the battlefields made me realize that wouldn't do me any good in tryin' to survive. It was just somethin' of a childish complaint. Even so… Incidentally… I found someone I really wanted to have look at me… He was small, weak, and didn't have anything. Yet he was trying to take hold of everything… No. Something about him made you think it could happen… But in order for him to aim so high… He has to always hone himself to the very limit… That's why… There's no room at his side for the weak."

He chuckled a bit. "But strangely, the more clear that becomes the more dazzling he is in my eyes… And I've had enough looking up at him from inside his dream… I… want to stand beside him… by attaining something of my own. He's… the only one I can't stand lookin' down on me."

"Stand beside… Griffith? Heh… You can't be serious! That's something a kid would say!"

Judeau interrupted Corkus' building rant. "I don't know. You're both just as impressive just in different ways. I'd say you're already standing by his side, Guts. If anyone's his equal, it's you."

Guts shook his head. "No… I'm not his equal. I'm just a weapon… I can't be his equal and stand by him unless I find a dream of my own… I'm not interested in class or rank. What I want is something else… Something I can win, for myself. Only then will I be satisfied…"

"That's why you sound like a brat!" Corkus shouted furiously, standing up. "Something you can win for yourself?! Hah! If something like that were easy to find, no one'd ever have to suffer! Even if you're lucky enough to find it, only a small handful of people get to be winners! Normal people use their own strength and talents to come to terms with their real lives and make do the best they can! There's plenty of people out there who say all you need is a dream! It makes me sick to look at assholes like that! All you need is a dream, huh? That's something weaklings who can't face the truth say! An unrealized dream's just a load of crap! Straight outta the horse's ass!"

"Corkus." Judeau said, trying to get him to calm down.

"You mean you don't have something like that?" Guts inquired.

Corkus reeled for a moment before looking away from Guts. "Keh! To Hell with this! Judeau, I'm done for the night. I can't stand to hang with the big baby anymore!" Corkus said as he turned and marched off.

"In spite of all that, he used to lead a band of thieves." Judeau stated. "Well, it was only ten men and times were tough. They crossed the Band of the Hawk and got put in their place. Ever since then, he's been one of ours. While no big deal… Maybe there was something he too wanted to win for himself. As for me… I've always been a jack of all trades."

He picked up a knife from the table and started twirling it around his fingers. "I'm better than average with swords and knives. And without boasting, I have a pretty quick wit too. But… I've never been the best at anything. That's why I decided… If I couldn't be the best, I'd fly in the wake of the one who seems the best. There's nobody who never wanted something."

He leaned back in his chair. "Don't get me wrong though. I'm pretty happy with things and my own situation. Well, from one perspective… That's not all true… To sacrifice your status as captain of the Raiders and maybe your title as Baron, all for some vague thing… I wonder if something's wrong? But there's something wrong with all men… Dreams… Win or lose, I'm sure you could spend your whole life chasing one… That day, three years ago, I said you'd find a place to belong here. I guess… I was wrong."

Judeu stood up. "I'll see you off. I hope you find it. Your… something."

Guts smiled at him.

The two paid for their drinks and left the bar.

As they trudged through the city, Judeau spoke up. "Hey, I do wanna ask you one thing."

"Mm?"

"What's up with you and Casca?"

Guts looked at him in confusion. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Ever since the two of you fell off that cliff, it's like you've gotten a lot closer."

"You really think so?" Guts asked. He did see it. Casca wasn't as hostile towards him as she used to be. She'd warmed up to him a lot since that whole fiasco. "Well… A lot's happened with her…"

Judeau gave him a sly smile. "Hmmmm…"

"What's that look for?" Guts demanded.

Judeau looked forward. "Why not try your luck with her?"

"What? Hold up! That was random! What made you say that?! Every old dog in the hawk knows that she and Griffith…"

"She… Casca… Can't be with Griffith. Chances are."

Guts looked down with a frown. Some part of him knew this. Whatever people thought of him, he wasn't stupid. He'd always known since he realized what Griffith's dream was and that Casca loved him. There was no way it would work out… Yet, he still held out hope for them. For Casca's sake. The woman did deserve some happiness. She deserved better than Guts, at least.

"Like you said, Griffith rose up from nothing to be the top General of Midland. That's practically a miracle itself. Ordinarily you'd throw your hands up and celebrate without hoping for anything more. But… We both know he won't stop. The goal he pursues is one of a kind… They say the Kingdom probably won't see war for some time. In that case, even Griffith won't have any opportunities to shine properly. His chances for promotion will be slim. Even if he's a general, he's still a soldier, after all. There's nothing beyond that."

Guts knew this too. And he knew what Judeau was getting at. He'd considered this very thing before. It was an idea he had to become a king, years ago when he was still having trouble resisting the ambition in his blood.

"He'll need a trump card. For one last push…"

"The Princess." Guts stated.

Judeau nodded. "Exactly. Catching the Princess Charlotte is the fastest shortcut to Griffith's ambition. Griffith is now the White Phoenix General, Midland's heroic savior. Beside even her highness. He'd appear quite a worthy companion. As fate would have it, General Julius, next in line to the throne after her highness and his son Adonis. Who was likely to marry her, are now dead by the hands of another. What's more, the Queen, well known within the court for her severity, and several conservative ministers were mysteriously burned to death on the night of the assassination attempt on Griffith. Thanks to that, the military awards ceremony is still postponed."

Judeau looked over his shoulder at Guts who was lagging behind him a bit. "Guts, you… No… Oh well."

Guts remembered Griffith's words from the night the Queen and Ministers burned…

'Guts, don't tell the others about this. It's not that I don't trust them. The hawks are bound by one fate, after all. But I don't want to reveal to them my dirty side. They need only feel as though we're rising up… You're rough enough to share this with. To the end.'

"In any case… This means those who'd interfere with Griffith's ambitions are all dead. The princess… She's in love with him. Well, that's probably by design… Anyway, there's no way he'll miss this chance. As for Casca, Griffith truly is special. It goes beyond any feelings for him… He rescued her from despair and gave her a new life. So it's more than love she feels for him… It's more like worship."

Judeau continued, "Yet despite all her efforts, can she find happiness being a woman longing for a man she can't ever have? Moreover, beside him is the woman he can't afford to refuse in fulfilling his dream. That woman can grant him the thing he most desires, the one thing Casca herself definitely can't offer him. That must be unbearable, dealing with that… So… What about Casca? Ever think you'd like to hold her?"

"I… She's a fine woman. She's a lot better than those noble girls who only know how to dress up. It's hard to find a woman you can trust to watch your back on the battlefield… But… Less a woman, I see her as a comrade." Guts told him.

"So?" Judeau asked.

Guts hesitated for a brief moment. "No… That's not it… Not entirely at least… The one who has her eye is Griffith. That's why, right now… I'm no good for her, like this."

Maybe once he was ready to consider himself Griffith's equal, he'd consider it. But not now. Not while he was still like this…

Judeau nodded in understanding. "Gotcha… It really seemed like there was hope for you though."

"For now, my hands are full with just me… This is far enough." Guts told him as they walked up a hill.

Once they reached the top, Guts realized they weren't alone. Waiting for them were Casca, Corkus, Pippin, and Rickert.

"You guys…"

Before he could finish speaking, Rickert rushed towards him and gripped his pants legs. "How could you, Guts?! Leaving without saying anything?! Why?! Don't you like the Band of the Hawk?!" The boy demanded, distraught.

"Rickert…" Guts sighed. Then he looked over at Casca who was just staring at him.

Before either of them could say anything, if any words were to be exchanged at all, Griffith stepped into view.

He and Griffith stared at eachother in silence. Seconds ticked by. It felt like an eternity had passed before Griffith finally spoke. "Are you… leaving?"

Guts nodded. "Yeah."

"You mean to quit the Band of the Hawk." Griffith said in a neutral tone. He was trying to hide his emotions and he did it well. But Guts knew him. He could hear the subtle tones in Griffith's voice and the almost invisible body language that betrayed his sadness and disbelief.

Guts looked down at the snow covered ground. "I'm sorry…"

Griffith's eyes widened and his body language shifted ever so slightly to shock.

"That doesn't explain anything! Tell us why!" Rickert pleaded, looking up at Guts' face towering far above the boy. "Aren't the Hawks just like family to you, Guts?! Why would you throw that away?!"

"Cut it out, Rickert." Judeau told the boy. "It's a man's decision. Hush and let him go."

"But… But, no…Th-this is bad for all of us, right?! Guts is the Raiders Captain… He's vital! We can't let him leave."

"We were invincible before he joined! He ain't the only reason the Hawks got so strong!" Corkus retorted.

"Yeah, but…!"

"SHUT UP, YOU!" Corkus shouted at Rickert. He then stepped forward and pointed at Guts. "Hey! Since it's come to this, listen up! I always hated you, pal! From the start! To be honest, I aimed my crossbow at your back more than just once or twice in battle."

Guts just stared down at Corkus, not reacting.

It was essentially a staring contest between him and Corkus. Corkus broke first. He turned away. "Heh… Now I finally see why you piss me off so much… It's that face… That stone cold, intense, scowlin' mug! Gets under my skin like nothin' else! That face… Like you're in some kinda agony or somethin'! Like you're the only one walkin' some path of sufferin' that no one else understands! Like you're the only one who's special! Don't be so proud! I don't buy it… You may be big and strong, but you ain't special. You can never become Griffith."

Guts remained silent. Unprovoked. His eyes drifted towards Griffith. He seemed to have the strongest reaction to hearing that out of anyone present, though he was still trying hard not to show it.

"Heh… Now that you're no longer one of the Hawks… If we meet on the battlefield, you better watch your back." Corkus said before turning and walking off.

"Guts…" Rickert pleaded.

"Thanks for everything." Guts told everyone. He looked at Casca and remembered Judeau's words.

'Casca can't be with Griffith… Why not try your luck with her…? Ever think you'd like to hold her…?'

Guts walked past Casca, but froze as Griffith drew his sword. There was a fierce look in his eye. He wasn't going to let Guts leave.

"Griffith…" Guts muttered. He didn't want to do this. He didn't want it to come to this…

"I thought I told you then… that you belong to me… You're my sword, Guts. I'm the only one who can wield you properly…" Griffith raised his saber and pointed it at Guts. "I won you with this. Your fight and your death, I hold both. If you want to leave my camp, then it'll be the same as that time… Wrest yourself away by your sword."

"Griffith!" Rickert called out in horror.

"Griffith, this isn't like last time. You can't win this… You know you can't…" Guts said, trying to appeal to reason.

"Draw your sword, Guts." Griffith ordered.

Guts sighed. "Guess we can't just smile and say, 'take care'?"

Griffith remained steadfast, holding out his sword.

"You're really serious…" Guts dropped his sack of belongings and drew his sword.

"W-wait!" Casca shouted. She rushed in between them, holding out her arms to block them from reaching each other. "Are you two serious?! Comrades are gonna cross swords?! Griffith, if you sheath your sword we can talk!"

Griffith adjusted his guard, readying for the coming battle that he and Guts both knew was inevitable at this point.

"Get back, Casca." Guts ordered. "Don't get in our way."

"What are you saying?! If you really do this…!"

Casca was cut off as Pippin grabbed her by the wrist and dragged her out of the way.

"Pippin?! What are you—? Let me go!"

Pippin looked at her and just shook his head.

Judeau raised a hand to his chin, observing the situation. " They have to do this now…"

"Hehehe… Serves him right…" Corkus chuckled to himself.

"What's wrong with all of you?! This is a sword fight! If we don't stop them…!" Casca shouted.

"This is their business. It's not for us to interfere." Judeau told her.

"But…"

"What're we gonna do without swords anyway?" Corkus snarked.

"Did you forget, living luxuriously among the regular army? What's taken by the sword must be recovered by it. That's the mercenary's… Our ironclad rule, isn't it?" Judeau asked. "That's been our way since even before coming to Midland. Mercenaries have their own way of doing things. And you know that's true."

"Yeah, but…!" Casca objected. "But…"

'You look like you're staring down an enemy. Makes sense…' Guts thought to himself as he and Griffith stared each other down. He kept hoping Griffith would just lower his sword, but it didn't seem like that was going to happen. 'Your expectations— your confidence in me as a soldier is vanishing into thin air, so I can't complain if you resent me. But still… Even if I'm hated or treated like a traitor…'

Guts took a deep breath. He couldn't let his thoughts of why distract him right now. He had to focus, or he would end up killing Griffith by accident.

Guts and Griffith stared at each other for a few more seconds, both thinking to themselves. Then, finally, they moved.

Guts raised his massive sword and delivered a powerful downward swing that broke Griffith's sword in two. He managed to keep control and pull his swing at the last moment to keep from cleaving Griffith in half.

Griffith, realizing he had just lost, let his broken sword slip from his hand and fell to his knees in despair.

"Griffith!" Casca shouted.

Guts sheathed his sword and knelt down in front of Griffith. He then pulled Griffith into an embrace. He didn't like people touching him… Not after the cult… But for Griffith, just this once, he'd make an exception.

Griffith froze in his grasp.

"Remember the night you and the Princess were talking during that party? Out in front of Promrose Hall? You said, to you, a friend is someone who would never depend upon another's dream… Someone who wouldn't be compelled by anyone, but would determine and pursue his own reason to live… And should anyone trample that dream, he would oppose him body and soul… Even if the threat were you… So that's why… That's why I have to go. So I can find my own dream. A dream, other than this urge to conquer that's in my bones. Because that's not a dream. Not really. It's an instinct. Something I was born with rather than what I aspire to. And I don't want it… I'm sorry, Griffith. I still consider you my brother, even if we aren't equal. Even if I'm less than you."

Guts released Griffith and set him back down.

"W-wait…" Griffith muttered, tears in his eyes. "Guts…"

Guts stood back up, and grabbed the sack full of his belongings. He then turned and started walking.

"Guts! Please… I…!" Griffith called after him. For the first time since Guts had met him, Griffith was struggling to find the words to say anything.

Guts steeled his heart, stubbornly tuning out Griffith's pleas, and kept walking.


"Remember the night you and the Princess were talking during that party? Out in front of Promrose Hall? You said, to you, a friend is someone who would never depend upon another's dream… Someone who wouldn't be compelled by anyone, but would determine and pursue his own reason to live… And should anyone trample that dream, he would oppose him body and soul… Even if the threat were you… So that's why… That's why I have to go. So I can find my own dream. A dream, other than this urge to conquer that's in my bones. Because that's not a dream. Not really. It's an instinct. Something I was born with rather than what I aspire to. And I don't want it… I'm sorry, Griffith. I still consider you my brother, even if we aren't equal. Even if I'm less than you."

As Guts said those words, Griffith realized exactly where he'd gone wrong. Why Guts was leaving… And it was all his own fault… How had he not realized this sooner…? That Guts saw himself as lesser, when that couldn't be further from the truth.

'Guts… You fool… You damned idiot! How…? How do you not realize you're the only man who I… You say you see me as your brother… We are brothers… Why can't you see it?'

As Guts set him back down in the snow, Griffith looked up at the giant. "W-wait…" Griffith pleaded breathless. "Guts…" He felt something hot on his cheeks. Wiping him face he realized… He was crying.

Guts picked up his belongings and started walking away.

"Guts! Please… I…!" Griffith called after him. So many thoughts were whittling through his head. He wanted to say so many different things. To make Guts realize how stupid he was being, and convince him to stay. But ultimately, he failed to say any of them. For the first time, he was truly at a loss for words. All he could do was watch as Guts walked away.

It broke him. Watching Guts leave, knowing it was his own fault, and unable to speak… It was too much for him. Griffith felt like his entire world had shattered and was crumbling down around him. And it was all his fault.

It hurt. It hurt so much.

The warp shook with the laughter of thirsting gods.


I'm not sure about the section with Guts telling Griffith his reasons for leaving and Griffith's thoughts of the situation. I'm willing to change or remove it if it doesn't fit or if it's not good.