Yotsuba 3
Yotsuba Nakano wakes up to see her worst nightmare.
No no no no no no. This can't be happening.
Last night I fulfilled my dream. It really happened. Fuutarou loves me. We kissed. He's my boyfriend!
And then I drooled all over him.
It's everywhere. All over his shirt. I'm so gross.
I didn't even make it one day with him before I blew it.
I should have known this would happen.
If he would have picked Ichika, he would have woken up to see her naked. I'm sure he would have preferred that to being covered in my drool.
"Yotsuba, what's wrong?"
She snaps out of her daze, and the barrage of intrusive self-hating thoughts recedes to the background. The two are still seated on the couch with their shoulders pressed together. Yotsuba tries her best to ignore the drool stain on her new boyfriend's shirt and assesses her situation.
"What's that on the table?"
"Nothing." Fuutarou grabs a small package from the table and shoves it in his pocket.
Was that candy or something? It looked like someone drew on it with sharpie.
Fuutarou looks into her eyes, with a look of mild concern, and puts a hand on her knee in what seems like a gesture of reassurance. He stands and walks toward the tiny kitchen of Ichika's apartment.
"Let's see if she has any coffee or tea or anything."
As he stood from the couch, his fingers brushed Yotsuba's thigh. It didn't seem intentional, but that doesn't matter. She feels her heart skip a beat, and her face becomes flushed. Her leg tingles.
Why am I freaking out so much? His fingers were barely above my knee. He has touched me hundreds of times before, and I had a crush on him that whole time, so why am I freaking out so much now?
Why do I have to be so embarrassed about this stuff? I'm blushing and freaking out just from him touching my lower thigh accidentally, so how can I be a proper girlfriend? If he knew I was so nervous, he would probably laugh at me for being so immature. Meanwhile it seems like nothing ever phases him.
Maybe I should try to turn the tables on him.
She sneaks up behind him while he is fiddling with Ichika's coffee maker. She pounces, wrapping her arms around his chest and raising up on her toes to plant a kiss on his cheek.
"Good morning," she says teasingly.
"Be careful, I'll spill the coffee grounds."
His shirt is wet. Oh yeah, that's my drool. Now I'm distracting him. And probably being too forward. Is this something that a girlfriend is allowed to do after dating just a few hours? He's probably so annoyed.
When he finishes pressing the coffee grounds, he turns toward her and she sees his cheeks are red and he is fighting a smirk. He nervously puts his arms around her.
"Good morning," he says in response.
Maybe he did like it. Wow he's so warm. I just want to bury my face into his chest. But it's hard to focus on how amazing this hug is because his shirt is wet from my drool. He seems to be acting like he didn't even notice my drooling. He is so considerate.
"I'm sorry about your shirt. You're probably really grossed out, huh? I'll look in Ichika's room and see if I can find a shirt you can wear."
She breaks off the hug to look for a shirt.
He continues speaking as she walks toward the bedroom. "Remember that one time when I stayed over for studying and when we woke up, Nino was yelling at you for drooling in her hair. That was hilarious."
He is laughing it off to be considerate of me. I wonder if he already regrets choosing to choose me last night.
She returns to him with the baggiest t-shirt she can find. It looks like it might be a men's size, so Yotsuba hopes it will fit.
Oh no. Is he going to change his shirt in front of me? I don't think I can handle that. I'm going to blush like an idiot again.
Instead he takes the shirt into the bathroom. She can hear him splashing water on his face.
As she stands in the middle of the apartment and stares at the bathroom door, she comes to a realization.
Ichika is gone to work, so I'm alone here with my boyfriend. Are we supposed to fool around now? Is that why Ichika brought us here? She would know a lot more about this stuff than me. Is that what normally happens now? I don't know what to do. If Fuutarou had chosen her, she would know what to do in this situation. Nino would too. They have both had boyfriends.
My only experience is watching rom-com anime. And nothing intimate ever happens in those shows—they just spend four seasons building up to a confession and then end without showing any intimacy afterward.
I don't know what to do, I'm just clueless, and a nervous wreck. Maybe things shouldn't have turned out this way.
Fuutarou emerges from the bathroom. "Sorry if you wanted me to change my shirt in here. I was too embarrassed…Anyway, I was thinking, what are we going to do about the study session tonight?"
"I'm sorry, it's going to be really hard for me to face them," Yotsuba says. "I did it again. I screwed up and tore us apart again. I wouldn't blame them if they can't forgive me again."
Fuutarou approaches her, raises his arm, then hesitates nervously as if he doesn't know exactly what he wants to do with it. He settles for putting his hand on her shoulder.
"Sometimes I have to teach you things many times before you actually pay attention and understand it. I'm used to it. So I'll keep telling you this until you finally get it. It's. Not. Your. Fault. Once your sisters decided to give me an ultimatum at the festival, this was bound to happen. I don't know if the ultimatum was the right way to settle things, maybe it was, but regardless, that's how it is. It's not your fault that I went to your room. In fact, you ran off and left me waiting there. And you ran off again and made me chase you across town. You didn't make it easy. So you can't blame yourself for any of this. You didn't do anything wrong. Except for being too nice, as usual."
Yotsuba's head droops. "Even if I can accept that, they won't. Especially Nino. I just wish everyone could be happy."
"You're talking like your sisters lost their one shot at love. Come on. I'm kind of a loser. They're not missing out on much. I'm just an incredibly lucky loser, lucky that a girl like you likes me. I'm sure your sisters will find someone that treasures them like I do you."
He always knows the sweetest and coolest thing to say. I wish I could do that for him.
"Well if they do find someone, I hope they don't find the same guy," she says. "Not again."
"You're right. We've had enough drama."
"So, um," Yotsuba says. "I don't know what to do about tonight. I want to ask Ichika, but she's at work. Maybe I'll text her about it. What's your plan for today?"
Fuutarou shrugs. "I should probably check in with Raiha. Otherwise I don't have anything else to do besides try to help you clean up this mess. And I don't mean Ichika's messy room. I mean the mess with your sisters."
"We could go and see Raiha right now, if you want? Going for a walk sounds good right now."
"Yeah sure. We could pick up some food on the way. Go ahead and dig through the mess in Ichika's room and see if you can find some clothes and shoes to wear."
Yotsuba ends up putting on a pink sun dress and short boots.
"This is the only thing I could find that isn't too warm. It's not something that I would normally wear…It's so girly…It's kind of embarrassing…and I'm worried that these boots might be really expensive."
"You look fine," Fuutarou says. "You'll be returning them later, so don't worry about it. Let's go."
He didn't make fun of me when he saw it. But it also wasn't 'you look hot'. Maybe he just doesn't pay attention to clothes at all.
The two start to leave, then they turn around and dig through Ichika's room to find Yotsuba's ribbon that she took off the night before. After that they finally set out.
As they walk, Fuutarou looks like he's deep in thought. He finally speaks.
"I wish I could go back in time to the first day of the festival and tell myself 'hey idiot, she likes you too, so stop worrying'."
"You really thought I was going to reject you?" Yotsuba asks. She feels genuinely surprised that Fuutarou would ever think that she didn't like him.
Why would he be worried about that? I'm so dumb and immature and clumsy and annoying and…well he's amazing.
"I didn't expect you to turn me down harshly, because you're you, but I never noticed any signs of you having romantic feelings for me like the other three." Fuutarou says. "Well except for when you kissed me under the bell. I didn't know what to think of that. But yeah I was super worried that you were going to turn me down. That was fighting for brain space with my worries about your sisters and the whole ultimatum situation."
"Well for me, you know I collapsed during the festival. I was worried about making everything go smoothly and not letting anyone down. But what I didn't tell you was that I was also struggling with myself about you. This whole time I have been bottling up and hiding my feelings for you, and I kind of relapsed on that during the festival. Partly because of the memories that came back during our trip to Kyoto, and partly because you were so good to me when I was in the hospital. When you stopped me from leaving and showed me the videos of everyone helping out, it was hard to keep a lid on how I feel about you."
She grabs his hand and intertwines her fingers with his.
His hands are so warm, and so much bigger than mine. They feel so strong. Is it normal to be attracted to a guy's hands? I'm so weird. If I told him he has sexy hands, he'd probably be weirded out. I wish I could just be normal.
"Then I'm glad neither of us has to worry about that anymore," he says. "Now we just have to worry about your sisters. And about finals. Oh yeah, I forgot to ask, didn't you say you have to take an entrance exam for that athletic school that recruited you?"
"Yeah, it's in a few weeks, I think. They say it's not super hard. I'm sure the entrance exam for the school you are going to will be a million times harder."
"I could help you prepare for that, if you want. Like extra study sessions outside of our regular sessions with your sisters."
"I would love that." Yotsuba smiles.
When the two arrive at the Uesugi home, Fuutarou announces as they enter, "Hey Raiha, I'm home and I have a guest. We brought some food if you're hungry."
Raiha peeks around the corner. "Yotsuba-san!" Raiha runs up to Yotsuba and they share a hug.
"Did you two have to stay late at the festival as class reps?" Raiha asks.
"Um, not exactly," Fuutarou says. "It was quintuplet drama again."
"Your brother chased me across town to tell me that he loves me," Yotsuba says, beaming.
Raiha claps her hands together and gasps.
"Big bro! You finally did it!"
"What do you mean 'finally'?"
"You liked her for a while, right? Me and Itsuki-san thought so at least. Yotsuba-san, I hope you were gentle when you turned him down. He may not look it, but big bro is sensitive."
"Don't worry, Raiha-chan. I didn't break your brother's heart. I have actually liked him longer than he liked me."
"WHAT!? I gotta call dad and tell him big bro got a girlfriend!"
"Please don't disturb him at work," Fuutarou says. "In fact, maybe don't tell him at all. I can't handle any more teasing right now, we get quite enough from Ichika. Hang on, wait a sec, Raiha, why did you think I liked Yotsuba for a while? I never said anything."
Raiha runs into the bedroom, and comes back with a tattered booklet. Yotsuba recognizes it as Fuutarou's planner from the school camping trip. A handwritten note inside says "Stories to tell Raiha: Yotsuba helped me with the test of courage, and it was really fun. Yotsuba taught me how to ski." The note continues on with various stories from the trip.
"Yotsuba-san's name is in here like a hundred times," Raiha says. "I noticed you're always talking about her. And when I see you with the quints, you're always looking at her." She turns to Yotsuba. "Maybe it's because he likes your ribbon. I do too!"
Fuutarou crosses his arms and turns his face away. His ears are bright red.
"I could get you a matching one if you want!" Yotsuba says.
Excitedly chatting with Raiha for a few hours raises Yotsuba's spirits. It doesn't take long before the two girls are discussing wedding details. Fuutarou pretends like he's not paying attention.
Yotsuba's excitement is cut short, however, when Fuutarou looks at his phone and says "Ichika texted and says we should go ahead and do the study session tonight."
I guess we can trust her. She was very supportive last night. But I can't just let her fix this for me. But I don't know what to do. I can't undo what happened yesterday, and I can't make Fuutarou switch his feelings for me to one of them. What if they never forgive me? This is the third time I have done something to tear us apart, and they say three strikes and you're out. I should ask Raiha-chan if she will be my sister, because I might have lost my other ones.
I screwed up. It's all my fault. I don't deserve to be happy.
