Chapter 68: Mysterious Ways
Upon leaving Bill's Office after her pointed discussion with Nathan, which had not gone at all as she had planned, Elizabeth actually paused to collect herself.
For a brief moment, she felt more at peace than she had in ages, perhaps even ready to fix things.
However, as she walked on, inklings of all the damage she had done and the seemingly insurmountable apologies she would have to make in order to fix everything, smote into her heart like a burning arrow, doing its very best to humble her.
But in order to cope, instead of responding with humility, her pride reared its ugly head, along with something akin to anger in the form of blame.
Now in her defense, Elizabeth Thatcher Thornton had been raised from childhood to always have her every desire fulfilled without question! And when something bad happened or something went wrong, it was never even considered that it could possibly be her fault. The matter was simply corrected or remedied, usually by someone on the Thatcher staff.
Yes, she had changed in Hope Valley, but she had also earned a position of control.
It was this privileged upbringing as well as that control that made the path of lashing out at others when cornered a much more familiar one than accepting any responsibility herself! And so she slid back into the comfortable path she knew best, with total ease, rather than face something that cast her in a light other than sterling! Perhaps things would just resolve themselves with time.
It was because of that pride and anger, that tendency to blame others, as well as being thoroughly frustrated, that she found herself right in the middle of a self-pity party, fighting an onslaught of tears.
'I'll admit 'I might not have behaved my best over the last three years, but circumstances and other people were at play here, too! None of this could possibly be all my fault!'
'And, yes, Nathan might even be right about what I feel for Charles; I'll give him that.'
'But he can't possibly be right about me running out of time with him!'
'That will never happen!'
'Why Charles loves me and he is as dependable as they come!'
'Charles would never leave me!'
'He will always, always be there for me, forever!'
Even though she had to admit, more sub-consciously than not, that it was embarrassingly true, and definitively beneath her high societal upbringing, that she had perhaps treated Charles a bit shabbily.
If truth be known, not only him but also little Eliza Jade!
Could this be a horrible pattern, she had repeated from Nathan and Allie?
Surely not!
But the possibility left her with an audible groan.
'Maybe I do have to do something to fix all this!'
However torn, that realization was quickly broken asunder by the swelling mix of pride, anger, blame, and sheer terror that was still consuming her.
Although on a sub-conscious level, her instincts were telling her she had to do something, on a conscious level, this couldn't possibly be all her fault!
'But could I really be losing Charles too?'
Blatant panic took root within her being, growing more pronounced with each step...
Instead of immediately going home to humbly apologize to Charles, she found herself running to the livery, saddling Sargent, and taking off in a mad flurry galloping through the snow, to the one place that had been her sanctuary over the last three years.
'Could Nathan possibly be right about losing Charles?'
'Am I really running out of time?'
Deep down, she knew she had been thoughtless and inconsiderate even, although she couldn't acknowledge the words, but shouldn't people understand, especially Charles?
She had been through an inordinate amount of pain, ever since Jack died, and so very confused.
'And these things just take time. Right?'
'But why does it feel like as badly as I want to, I can't move forward?'
'Why am I stuck in this limbo?'
'What has changed inside me?'
'Where is the strong, capable woman I used to be?'
'Was I ever that?'
'Why, why, am I still going through all this pain?'
'None of this can possibly be my fault!'
'And I'm tired of it all!'
It had taken a long while, but Elizabeth Thatcher Thornton's hurt had finally turned to anger.
Real anger...
At the cemetery, she dismounted Sargent in one furious fell swoop onto the snowy carpet, racing to Jack, standing indignantly before his headstone.
It was Jack's fault!
All of this was Jack's fault!
Jack had put her through this; it had been Jack who had left her!
Everything would be perfect if he were still here.
Practically screaming, she angrily enunciated each of her words.
"I'm here, Jack!"
It was as though her words were a dare, daring him to face her anger.
But this time, finally and unbelievably…there was a response of some sort, as the winds rattled gently about her.
'Wait, was that a voice I heard?'
Surely it was just the winds, also angry at her weakness, mocking her own anger, mocking her.
'No! It is a voice! I would know that voice anywhere!'
It was Jack's sweet, tender voice, coming from a distance.
The one he used with only her, his beloved Wife, his tone causing all of her anger to instantly disappear.
Very slowly Jack appeared out of the shadows, his voice calling out to her, as his hands beckoned her to him.
"Come take a walk with me, Elizabeth."
There was a longing in his eyes, a tender smile on his face, pure love in his words.
She had to fight to catch her breath.
'Take a walk with me!'
How many times had she longed to hear those precious words again?
Those words had signified their special, most intimate moments together.
Because, when they had taken their walks with each other, they had poured out their hearts and their very souls, laying themselves each bare for the other.
"Jack, you're here!" she cried incredulously, with uncontained joy on her face.
Jack laughed.
"Of course, I'm here! I'm everywhere. Especially where you and my Son are concerned! Don't you know that by now, Elizabeth?"
All she wanted was to embrace him, to completely lose herself in him.
But, as Jack drew near, instead of embracing her, he offered his arm to her instead.
She took his arm, standing proudly beside her Husband, and it was as though he had never left her.
With that simple touch, everything came flooding back.
Every feeling, every emotion.
Everything was real again.
Everything was right again.
Everything was whole again.
His touch was the same, stirring all the emotions they had shared deep inside her over the years, that had started the moment they had truly found each other.
The moment their attraction turned into so much more.
She was floating, floating with her Jack, who was proudly dressed in his Red Serge.
"I'm so happy, Jack! You look so handsome. It's really you! You're finally here! I knew you would eventually come to me! I just knew it!"
"Of course, I was coming," now embracing her as though there could have never been any doubt.
But then he pulled away from her and his face grew serious.
"I'm afraid we don't have a lot of time, though, my Darling! I have a brother I want you to meet, Elizabeth."
"Tom?"
"No, you already know Tom."
And then Jack chuckled.
"You already know my other brother, too," he added.
"What do you mean? You don't have another brother!"
"Oh, I beg to differ! I most definitely have another brother. We've been connected, pretty much as one, for a very long time now. He's the best there is, Elizabeth. Although he's not much of a talker, that one!"
"Who, Jack? Who is it you want me to meet?"
Jack led her to a clearing, holding her hand the entire time, with her arm still looped in his.
"Ah, there he is!"
"But I know him, Jack! Why that's Nathan. That's Nathan Grant!"
"That's my brother."
"Come sit with Jack and me, Lisbeth," prompted Nathan, as he rose from sitting on a log, also in his Red Serge.
Stretching out his long arm, he pointed to the log. Could it be THE log? Yes, there were their initials J&E on the front side, and there, embarrassingly, was the mark where she had almost carved a tiny N&E on the very end, for her alone to see.
But she had been too afraid, and had stopped with the second diagonal line of the 'N.'
"I'm confused! Jack, you're dead. But Nathan, you're alive. I just saw you!"
"That's wrong, Elizabeth," corrected Nathan.
"What do you mean," her face suddenly filled with horror. "Are we dead, too?"
And then there was that crooked grin.
It really was Nathan.
He couldn't help but chuckle.
"Jack is much more alive than you or me! You see, my brother's at peace. You and I are still here."
"But why? Why can't we go with Jack?"
"Because we need to live, to love, to learn, right here on earth, where we're supposed to be. We haven't yet earned what Jack has earned."
"What do you mean?"
"He means to live, Elizabeth. You're a teacher! Surely you understand what that means," explained Jack, with a bemused look on his face. "Although I'll admit, it does seem you've been struggling."
Then he repeated the term, for her to soak in the phrase.
"To live, that is. To truly live."
"No, no, I don't understand what you're saying! I am living! I'm living right now!"
"Are you, Elizabeth?" asked Jack, glancing at Nathan.
"To live is to love, Lisbeth. Are you loving?"
"No, that's not right. I'm alive. I'm living."
"Or are you grieving, Lisbeth?"
"No, Nathan," interrupted Jack, with a knowing look. "You and I've talked about this. You let her get by with that, excusing her actions as grief, but it wasn't. Elizabeth thinks she's grieving, but really, she's doing the opposite of that. She's not loving, so, no, Elizabeth, you aren't living. And you're really not grieving. You're simply making excuses! To me, to Nathan, to the Universe. To yourself."
"But I am grieving for you, Jack. I loved you! I love you!"
"You loved Nathan, too."
Elizabeth swallowed hard. It was true. But how could Jack possibly know?
"Oh, I was proud of you, too, Elizabeth, so proud of you for loving him! But then you used your grief for me as an excuse. And you ran away from Nathan. Pretending to make him into me. You ran away from the man I hand-picked to be your husband and the father of our son. Don't you see? I sent my most honorable brother to you, for you to love him, and you did fall in love with him, just as I knew you would. But you made excuses, and almost destroyed him in the process, pretending to love someone else. Really, Elizabeth! Had I known, I would have never put Nathan through that! Not my brother."
"It's okay, Jack. We've gone over this before. I'm fine," reassured Nathan solemnly.
"Stop it, Jack! Why are you saying these horrible things? I did love him, Jack. I loved Nathan, but I just…"
"Made excuses," Jack finished her sentence for her.
"I did not!" she flared, and then she turned to Nathan.
"I didn't, Nathan!"
"You did, Lisbeth."
"But that's not why we're here," interjected Jack.
"No," agreed Nathan. "Thankfully, it is not."
"Why are you here?" Elizabeth asked with terror on her face. "Why are both of you here? What is it you want with me?"
"You keep making excuses, Elizabeth. Unlike me, you're going to end up dying without living again. At least I lived, I loved the entire time I was down here. And did it with abandon and passion! I say 'again,' meaning since, after me, you've just chosen to die. You've dying, Elizabeth. It's plain to see. Think how that makes me feel. You didn't love our love enough to want to experience any love again. That's how little I meant to you, how little our love meant to you!"
"No, Jack, that wasn't it at all. I didn't want to hurt you. I didn't want to risk losing again. I didn't want to…"
"Love?" asked Nathan.
"That's just cruel!"
"Is it, Lisbeth?"
"Is it, Elizabeth? I'm with my brother on this one. Quite frankly even the Big Man is getting tired of your excuses. You see they don't bode well with Him."
"What?"
"God, Elizabeth. God! He's weary of your excuses. Just like I am. Just like Nathan is. Not to mention, poor Millicent, who's treating you with more compassion than I could begin to muster if I were in her shoes. We're all weary. Really weary!"
"But, but…
"No buts, Elizabeth," Jack's voice wasn't angry, but it was awfully close.
It was firmer than she could ever remember having heard it before, and there was a look of disappointment on his face, that was awfully close to disdain.
Jack meant business.
Nathan meant business.
Elizabeth swallowed hard.
"But I don't understand what it is you want."
"It's simple, really. Isn't it, Nathan?"
"Live, love, and move forward with your life, Lisbeth."
"Do we have to spell it out for you, Elizabeth? Nathan just did, yet you're acting like you still don't get it. I'll be honest, here, I wasn't too pleased with the idea of Charles as your partner. But Nathan…"
"Nathan?"
"Nathan has made me see that Charles is a good man, and he loves you. He's in love with you. So, I'm going to put aside my earthly jealousy, and pray that you put aside your excuses. Don't dare do to that poor man what you did to Nathan. It's unacceptable, Elizabeth! Either love Charles or leave him be. He's been through a lot more than you know."
"But, Jack, it's too late," sighed Nathan.
"It can't be too late. Charles is at my house, waiting on me right now!"
"Is he, Lisbeth?"
"Is he, Elizabeth?"
"Why are you two doing this to me?"
"We're not, Elizabeth."
"You are doing it to yourself, Lisbeth, don't you see?"
"But I didn't mean to shame you, Jack, and I didn't mean to hurt you, Nathan. I truly didn't."
"All forgiven, Elizabeth."
"All forgiven and forgotten, Lisbeth."
"But I don't know what to do or how to do it or when to do it or…"
"You're not supposed to know everything, Elizabeth."
"You're only supposed to love, Lisbeth."
"And I know, first-hand, you know how to love, Elizabeth."
"I used to, Jack. When you were here with me. But I can't…not anymore. Not really!"
"You can start over, Lisbeth. I did."
His startling blue eyes bore into hers.
"And it will be beautiful, Elizabeth. Not like ours, but different. Maybe better!"
"How dare you? Don't you dare say that, Jack!"
"Why not? It's the truth. If you will love and let it flourish into what it wants to be, it might even be better."
"Look at my brother, here," and Jack nodded toward Nathan.
"Is that what you did, Nathan?" asked Elizabeth.
"Yes, Lisbeth, it is. To live again, to love again, I had to start over, in order to not die from the pain."
Her eyes clouded, momentarily, as she realized it was her cruelty toward him and her inability to freely love, that had made him feel that pain.
"Is starting over better?"
"With all due respect, Lisbeth, it is better. So much better! Better than I ever dreamed it could be! My life is now what it was meant to originally be. Yours can be too," he insisted.
"But weren't you scared?"
"Are you scared, Lisbeth?"
"Terrified."
"Because of me?" asked Jack. "Baby, that's not what this is all about."
Jack reached for both of her hands, the same way she had held Nathan's hands so many times.
Elizabeth started crying.
"Elizabeth, look at me. You aren't a child. You are a beautiful woman. A very capable woman who was made to love. Instead of continuing to love me, you need to love for me, Elizabeth. And instead of continuing to love Nathan, you need to love for him. Honor us. We are moving on, Elizabeth, but you are stuck."
"You can't truly live without love, Lisbeth!"
"You don't want to live the rest of your days as an angry, bitter woman, Elizabeth."
"No! But, how do I stop all this? I can't help what I feel. I don't know how to stop the feelings. Nor the excuses! I don't know how to turn things around. I don't even know how else to think! It's like some torturous death spiral that I can't get out of! And it's all your fault, Jack!"
"Things happen. That's not anyone's fault. This isn't about fault. It's about your excuses. They will only lead to massive regrets, Elizabeth. And yes, to death, from not living. Do you want that for our Son?"
"Do you want that for yourself, Lisbeth? You can't live and cling to your excuses at the same time. You'll never truly love again."
"No…no…but how? How do I really love again? How do I start over?"
"Take responsibility for your mistakes, Elizabeth."
"That's it?" she asked, incredulously.
"Learn to pick yourself up after falling down. Like you did with Lucas, like you did with me. Like I did. And then when you're standing, start over. It's that simple, Lisbeth."
"Elizabeth, time is not on our side, and as Nathan has previously pointed out to you, nor yours! But I do have one question. One simple question. Love me enough one more time, my Darling, to answer it honestly. Please?"
"Always, Jack! What? What could you possibly need to ask me? What is the question?" asked Elizabeth more perplexed than ever.
"Well, it's two questions in one, really, Jack," reminded Nathan, with a grin.
"Yes, you're right, brother, it is!"
"So, what are your questions, Jack?"
"Do you love Charles? Are you in love with Charles?"
Elizabeth twisted her wool skirt in both her hands.
"I don't like this, Jack. It isn't fair of you to ask me that! Not here, not now."
"Don't they say, all's fair in love and war? Right?" he chuckled, then grew serious. "Isn't this a little bit of both? Aren't Nathan and I battling for your life, here? We along with Charles are the men who have loved you. Don't we have a right to know?" (*59)
"You know they say that, and yes, after all I've put you through, I suppose you do both have a right to know. But it's awkward, Jack!"
"Then love me enough to honor my questions for both Nathan and me. Give us the answers of your heart, my beloved."
She looked down at the snowy blanketed ground, unblemished below them. With alarm, she momentarily realized there were no tracks in the snow. Not hers, not Jacks, not Nathans.
Yet they were here with her now, all of them together, conversing in the cold and bitter snow, with the wind whipping about them.
"Yes," she whispered, unable to look at either of them.
"Elizabeth, we can barely hear you…." insisted Jack.
"Yes," she said loudly, almost defiantly. "I love Charles, and yes, I'm in love with Charles!"
"Now that wasn't so hard, was it? I'm thrilled for you, my Darling! Nathan and I are trying to pick you up. Now, all you have to do is start over, Elizabeth. We know you can do that! Live fully! Love Charles well and be a joyous family with my Son and Eliza Jade. There will be others, you know!" gleamed Jack, as he turned with a wink.
He was leaving and she wasn't going to have it!
"Jack, no! Don't leave me! Don't you dare leave me! Please don't! It's because you left me that I can't find my way!"
"But you just found it! Someday you'll understand that my love is always with you. Nathan's love is always with you. Both in a different way than what they were. But, leave, I must, my Love!"
"Jack, wait, there's a problem," reminded Nathan. "Charles is gone."
"Afraid, that's your problem to solve, brother. I have things to do…" grinned Jack, with one brow raised.
"Yeah, as if I don't!" chuckled Nathan, shaking his head, as both men saluted each other.
Jack tipped his hat, and with a grateful smile and one final salute he was gone.
"Jack! Jack! Come back! Please!"
"He can't, Lisbeth. His part of our mission is complete."
"But he's gone, Nathan! He's gone!"
And Elizabeth threw herself upon Nathan.
"He's in your heart, always, Lisbeth. Always."
She shook her head, barely able to say the words she knew she had to make him hear.
"As so are you, Nathan," she whispered.
Her voice choked before she could continue.
"You're right beside Jack in my heart, Nathan, always. But now I know, both of you are there in different ways from before. No longer in love, but with unceasing love. Finally, I know now, I haven't really lost either of you and never will. Thank you, Nathan, for somehow making me see that, at last!"
She shook in his arms, sobbing, still faltering as to how to proceed, prompting him to whisper very explicitly, his and Jack's reason for this trialogue, their purpose in meeting with Elizabeth.
Showing the teacher exactly what she had to do.
"Now, you simply have to walk away from the pain of the past, into your new joy."
Nathan gently led her, still sobbing, to Jack's gravestone, where she threw herself down to say one final goodbye to the Husband she adored.
Silently, Nathan went to get Sargent and brought him to Elizabeth, handing her the reins.
"Nathan, I'm so very, very sorry for everything I put you through. I truly loved you."
Hers was a guttural groan, with pure empathy and sorrow in her disconsolate eyes, bordering on shame, for what she had unintentionally made this Prince of a Man suffer.
"All forgiven, all forgotten, Lisbeth."
And although Elizabeth couldn't know it, it would be the last time she would ever hear his special name for her.
She nodded up at his solemn face, then he continued, with that lop-sided grin of his finding its inevitable way to the place it belonged.
"And now, Mrs. Thornton, our glorious futures await us!"
Elizabeth smiled through her tears, but when she glanced down and then quickly back up, Nathan had faded away too, just like Jack.
"Nathan!" she screamed. "Please don't leave me!"
But there she was, all alone...
Elizabeth's unnerving encounter with Jack and Nathan could not have been more real, and it shook her to her very core!
So much so that instead of riding Sargent back to town, she walked slowly in front of him, leading him, while deep in thought.
Their discussion had given her a focus and strength that had constantly escaped her over the last three years.
It was as though her eyes were finally clear.
She loved Jack, but that was then.
This was now.
She loved Nathan, but that was then.
This was now.
And now she loved Charles, a man she was also treating horribly, just as she had treated Nathan.
But no more!
As Rosemary would say, it was to be Charles who would be her lifetime love. Jack had been her season of love. Nathan had been her reason to love again and could have been her lifetime love had she not been so neglectful, but thankfully, he was still also her dearest life-long friend.
The person who centered her like no other.
Theirs was a deep connection that would never fade.
It had just changed.
Finally, she was able to accept he had been a love every bit as powerful and wonderful as her first, but she could now do so with the peace of moving on from both loves.
It had taken her two Loves together to break her, to get her to see, to lovingly guide her into her future, with this, her third love, her forever love.
All her excuses, labeled as grief, had damaged her, changed her into something she didn't even recognize, much less like!
She was so ashamed.
"No wonder Nathan and I were never able to be a Couple!" she voiced the words aloud to the wind, throwing her free hand to her face. "Why would he want what I've become?
Why would any man want that? How could anyone continue to love that?"
"Nathan's been so patient with me. If truth be known, much more patient than Jack ever could have been."
"And Charles, poor Charles. He's been just as patient. He understands exactly what I'm going through because he is going through the very same thing. He's just been waiting for me to find my own footing, my own timing."
"But Nathan's right. Charles is growing impatient, and rightfully so."
Elizabeth realized it was getting late into the evening, and she needed to be home, to find Charles and tell him, she was ready.
Ready to love him.
Truly ready to love him, with nothing held back!
She couldn't wait to see his face!
Perhaps they could celebrate and go to the Café for a romantic dinner, with just the two of them!
She was finally ready to humble herself and swallow her pride.
"Please God, please don't let it be too late…"
At the Grant rowhouse, Nathan was amazed as his Daughter walked down the stairs.
"Allie, you look beautiful!"
"Really?"
"Really! Are you ready to go to Dinner, Daughter? We have reservations for half-past six!"
"Do we get to take the car?" asked Allie excitedly.
"Sorry, kiddo. Faith, says no driving till next week! Besides your Uncle Kyle and Uncle Lance are ready to do some walking tonight! They're going to have their dinner too!"
Allie made a face.
"You know, I was thinking Dad since Momma can drive, maybe you'd teach me to drive?"
"Nice try! But you and I are sticking to Horses!" and with that Nathan helped Allie into her coat, and then formally offered his arm. "Try again when you're twenty-one!"
"Oh, Dad! I'm never gonna be able to do anything!"
"Hmph! I'll remember that the next sleepover you ask to go to!" grinned Nathan.
"Ugh! Got it, Dad! Hey, can you straighten my French Braid?"
"Let me see, but you do know this is the one I have trouble with."
"I think if you just fluff it with your fingers, maybe…"
"How in the world does one 'fluff' with their fingers? I think we need your Momma!"
"That's for sure! But you can't do this, Dad!"
"Are you sure?"
"Just run your fingers through it, like a comb," instructed Allie, knowingly. "And give the strands a little tug, but not too much!"
"Okay….'fluffing' with my fingers. But hold still wiggle worm! There! Hm! Much better. Who would have known 'fluffing' works?"
"Dad!"
"What?"
She giggled.
"Nothing! Hey, is this like a real date, Dad?"
"Don't you dare get any ideas, Young Lady!"
Nathan grinned, as he could feel and see Allie's eyeroll without even looking.
"That's my Girl…"
Having sorted through everything, Elizabeth was so anxious to see Charles, she mounted Sargent just outside of town, and galloped to her rowhouse as fast as she could.
Dismounting, at her front porch, and out of breath, she ran to her front door, but it was locked.
"That's odd. Charles never locks the door till after 10:00 PM."
She knocked, anxious for him to come to the door.
But it was Laura, instead, with Little Jack on her hip, who answered the door.
And Elizabeth couldn't help but notice Laura looked anxious.
"Laura, what are you doing here?"
"I'm sorry, Mrs. Thornton, but I didn't know what else to do!"
"What do you mean, Laura? Where's Charles? Where's Miss Shay and Eliza Jade?"
"I'm sorry. They're all gone. Mr. Kensington asked me to stay and take care of Little Jack."
"Gone? Where?"
"Back to Hamilton, via the Train."
Elizabeth panicked.
"What time did they leave, Laura? I need to know the exact time!"
Elizabeth's mouth was dry, and the pit in her stomach was growing larger and larger by the minute.
"They left here at 2:30 to catch the 3 o'clock train. Mr. Kensington left you a letter for me to give you. It's there on your desk."
Elizabeth tore to her desk, and as she opened the envelope, she became more and more frantic.
"Oh, no! No! Nathan was right. It is too late!"
She threw her hands to her face in anguish.
"I'm really running late, Mrs. Thornton, and I have some chores to do at home or I'd stay."
"Oh, Laura, I'm so sorry! Of course, you need to go. But do you mind stopping by Rosemary's and asking her to come over for me?"
"Of course, not! I'm truly sorry I can't stay," and Laura handed Little Jack to his distraught Mother…"
In the midst of her new-found circumstances, Elizabeth was truly panicked and although Rosemary had come to stay with Little Jack at Laura's request, she hadn't offered any words of encouragement to Elizabeth that actually made her feel better.
This was on her.
Thankfully, she had Sargent still tied outside. Elizabeth mounted him and took off starting to gallop toward town. But she immediately slowed to a trot, checking first at Nathan's rowhouse, although it was clear, no one was there. Not even Security.
"Please, Nathan, please be in town…"
The Judge's Office where Nathan had been working, and even the Mountie Office where Gabe had spent the day, were both dark, but there seemed to be quite a bit of activity at the Café. Maybe Nathan was there. If not, Bill would know where he was.
She had to get to Nathan.
It had to be Nathan.
He was the only one who would understand, the only one who could help her!
She dismounted in front of the Café and breathed a sigh of relief as she saw Nathan and Allie sitting at the table in the front window.
She ran inside, completely out of breath.
"Nathan, I need help!" she said in a very loud voice.
Nathan stood immediately.
"What's wrong, Elizabeth. How can I help you?"
It was then that she understood the entire Café was listening, waiting for her answer, including the Bouchard Family, who were at a table close by.
She nodded for Nathan to follow her outside.
"Allie, Sweetheart, can you hold off ordering till I get more information?" asked Nathan as he patted her shoulder, and simultaneously swung toward the door.
"Sure, Dad," answered Allie morosely.
She had been through this many times before.
"Just one of about a million interruptions," mumbled Allie in a low voice.
But maybe, tonight would be a bit different. Maybe Mrs. Thornton wouldn't need her Dad to leave. Maybe she was just giving him a message, but why did she need to do it privately?
Suddenly, there was again a strong hand on Allie's shoulder.
"Uncle Bill! Dad had to go."
"I see. Mind if I join you? That is just until your date comes back?"
"Sure, Uncle Bill!" smiled Allie, glad to have the company, but with her mind still on Mrs. Thornton.
Allie was trying, but truth be known, she still wasn't ready to trust her teacher…
Outside on the cold Boardwalk, Elizabeth couldn't get the words out.
"Breathe. Breathe in…and out. In and out."
"It's Charles. They left on the Three PM Train for Hamilton!" she was breathing heavily and about to cry too.
And she was so ashamed. Nathan had been right, Charles had had enough of her abuse. And the sad thing was, she knew she deserved this.
"Elizabeth, what is it you want me to do?"
"I want you to stop him. To tell him to come back!"
"Elizabeth, I can't arrest him."
She let out a frustrated gasp, knowing she was crossing lines that shouldn't be crossed.
"Please, Nathan! Please just do something! Anything!"
Her eyes were pleading, and she looked like the floodgate was about to burst.
"I suppose I could call the Train Depot and have them get an emergency message to him. But, Elizabeth, you know, that doesn't mean he will actually come back."
"I know, Nathan. I know. And it's my fault! But if you can please just get the message to him, I'll be most grateful."
Nathan nodded.
"You go home. I'll let Allie know I have to be a few minutes late to our dinner."
"Oh, Nathan, I'm so sorry. I truly am. Thank you for today, all three times."
Without missing a beat, Nathan responded.
"Not a problem!"
Wait, was Nathan aware they had spoken three times? Was he aware of the talk with Jack, too? Was it even possible?
"What's wrong, Elizabeth?"
"Nothing, I'll explain later. Just know now that I'm grateful. Truly grateful. For everything!"
As she turned to mount Sargent, she added something else.
"And Nathan, I'm truly, truly sorry for what I've done to you. And for what I've done to Millicent. I promise I'll make it up to you both."
"We appreciate that. We do. I especially appreciate it for Millicent's sake. But we're adults, Elizabeth. It's Allie, who we're both really concerned about. Do you think maybe you could give her a reason or two to forgive you?"
"More than one or two! I'm so ashamed of what I did to that sweet girl. I'll somehow fix it, Nathan. I don't know how. But, I promise, I'll figure out a way. You have my word, I'll fix it!"
Nathan nodded in acceptance.
"I don't even know who this person is I've become," she admitted.
"Sounds like you want the old Elizabeth back."
Nathan said the words as a statement; not a question.
"I suppose I do. But what I really want is an even better version of what I was before. Does that make sense?"
Nathan smiled.
"That makes all the sense in the world! It's funny how living teaches us to love," he noted with twinkly eyes.
"Where have we heard that before?" she asked with a chuckle.
Then before continuing to mount, she stepped back and reached up to hug Nathan.
"Thank you with all my heart!"
"You are welcome, Elizabeth."
But Nathan wasn't smiling.
Instead, he was silently praying.
Praying that somehow Elizabeth would find her way to the life that was meant for her to live.
Then with the slightest of smiles, he turned and went back into the Café to chat with his Daughter…
"Allie, I have to go to the Mountie Office to place an urgent call. It should take about ten minutes. Is that okay?"
"Sure, Dad. Do you want me to order?"
"That would be great! And Sweetheart, I'm sorry!"
"It's okay, Dad. Looks like Mrs. Thornton needs you."
Nathan smiled weakly, as Bill walked back up to see what was going on. But Nathan nodded goodbye to the other customers. And started out the door.
"We'll talk later, Bill," he called. "Thanks for taking care of Allie till I get back…"
After finishing his urgent call, having had to call in a favor while doing so, Nathan walked as fast as he could back to the Café and Allie, wishing with all his heart Millicent could be there to have Dinner with them.
He was relieved Elizabeth seemed to want to treat Millicent better and make things right with Allie.
Truthfully he wanted that desperately, but only time would tell.
To be frank, he wasn't at all sure whether Charles would come back to Hope Valley or not.
And he had no idea how Elizabeth would respond to that!
But he had given this his best shot, knowing he had at least made it difficult for Charles to refuse.
As he noticed Elizabeth leave the livery in the distance, something impressed Nathan to look up to the skies and let his brother, his Mountie comrade know.
So he did as he was impressed to do, saluting into the night, and while doing so, words innately spilled from his mouth without really knowing why.
"Mission almost accomplished, brother! It's now just a matter of time till Elizabeth is whole again!"
What 'mission' he didn't know, but somehow the term seemed appropriate, from one Mountie to another.
Yes, there was dead silence in response, which was exactly what he had expected, but deep within, Nathan believed with all his heart that his cryptic message, even though he didn't fully understand it, had been received by the appropriate recipient.
In the falling darkness, still bemused, Nathan respectfully tipped his hat to a known yet unknown brother, then couldn't help but chuckle as a poem, and later hymn, came to him, soothing his puzzled mind:
"God moves in a mysterious way,
His wonders to perform;
He plants his footsteps in the sea,
And rides upon the storm.
Deep in unfathomable mines
Of never failing skill;
He treasures up his bright designs,
And works His sovereign will.
Ye fearful saints fresh courage take,
The clouds ye so much dread
Are big with mercy, and shall break
In blessings on your head.
Judge not the Lord by feeble sense,
But trust him for his grace;
Behind a frowning providence,
He hides a smiling face.
His purposes will ripen fast,
Unfolding ev'ry hour;
The bud may have a bitter taste,
But sweet will be the flow'r.
Blind unbelief is sure to err,
And scan His work in vain;
God is his own interpreter,
And he will make it plain." (*60)
Nathan was so very grateful that God had made everything plainly clear in his own life, finally bringing him and Millicent together in spite of their excuses, well, mostly his excuses, as had always been His resplendent plan.
And now, He was doing the same exact thing for Elizabeth…
No sooner had Nathan stepped inside the Café, than Lucas anxiously rose and came over to him.
"Is Elizabeth okay, Nathan?" he asked nervously.
"Yes, Lucas, she's okay. Everything will be fine," nodded Nathan, believing that her circumstances would work out one way or another.
"Thank you for letting me know!"
The two men nodded, this time respectfully, and Lucas went back to his Family and their meal.
Bill served the Grant's meal personally, sitting down to join them with a cup of coffee.
"What's this all about?" he asked in a low voice.
Nathan looked at Allie, not wanting to say.
"Does this have to do with Charles," asked Bill, again in a low voice.
Nathan nodded imperceptibly in the affirmative, causing Bill to sigh.
"I'm sorry, Nathan."
Nathan understood what Bill was indirectly saying to him and he appreciated it.
He really did, but, thankfully, he was way past being hurt by Elizabeth or her choices.
His heart was completely and utterly taken by an extraordinary, gorgeous woman who would move Heaven and Earth to keep him from ever being hurt again, leaving no room for even a thought of any past pain.
Besides tonight, he was on a date with his Daughter, and so he teasingly shooed her Uncle Bill away, while turning back to give Allie his full attention.
"Dad, I ordered us the Roast Chicken. Is that okay?"
"This looks delicious! Yum, Mashed Potatoes and Corn Pudding, too! This is exactly what I was hungry for!"
"Don't forget Uncle Bill's Famous Yeast Rolls!"
"Couldn't be better! Would you like to say Grace, Allie?"
"Yes, Sir!"
The two held hands and Allie led in their prayer.
Although unnoticed by the Grants, Lucas was observing the two intently. John Henry watched him. Antoinette watched him.
Both knowing that aside from them, love was missing in Lucas's life.
For there was a lot of love between Nathan and Allie, and everyone could see it, as they couldn't help but watch the two as Allie said Grace.
"Dear Father, we thank You for this special night and we thank You for this delicious food, Uncle Bill cooked for us. But we ask you to help Mrs. Thornton with her problem. She tries to be a good person, and I think she just needs help. So, if You could just help her, that would really be great. Thank You! Amen!"
Nathan sat still, beaming at his Daughter with pride.
"It was very nice of you to add Mrs. Thornton to our prayer, Allie. I'm proud of you."
She smiled, but weakly, and he could tell she didn't want to discuss it, so he was going to let it go for now.
But just as suddenly, she changed her mind.
"Momma said I should try to forgive Mrs. Thornton."
"Did she, now?"
"Yes, and she said she knew that I could forgive her even if it took me some time to do it."
"Your Momma's right, Allie."
Allie sighed heavily.
"I'm trying, Dad. I really am."
"That's all your Momma and I can ask. And Allie, God will let you know when the time is right. He also will heal your heart from the hurt."
"Has God healed your heart? I mean from the hurt? All that hurt Mrs. Thornton caused you?"
"Yes, Allie. He has. A long time ago."
"And you don't feel bad towards her?"
"All forgiven and forgotten, Allie!"
She nodded and he continued.
"I'm really proud of you, Sweetheart. Just like your Momma said, forgiveness will come, I'm sure of it, and when it does, it will help you every bit as much as it helps Mrs. Thornton. Maybe even more!"
The two smiled together, and picked up their utensils, taking the first bite of the juiciest Roast Chicken either had ever tasted!
"Dad, can I ask you a question?"
"Well, it's may, and yes you may. Anything, anytime, Allie. Father-Daughter rules! And they always apply."
"Do you think Momma is thinking about us?"
"She absolutely is."
"How do you know?"
"The three of us are already a Family! We love each other, and we're thinking about her, so of course, she's thinking about us! You know, she arrives home in Montreal tomorrow, which means we get to speak with her on the phone tomorrow night!"
Allie's face burst into a real all-out smile. The broadest since Millicent had left. And Nathan was so thankful to see it!
"I can't wait! Dad, do you realize your face gets all funny when we talk about Momma?"
"My face gets all funny?"
Allie giggled, then inserted an exemplary eyeroll.
"Yes, Dad! she explained with an exasperated sigh, "You get this dreamy smile on your face and your eyes twinkle like crazy!"
"They do, do they?"
"Yes, Sir! And I'm not the only one who notices either!"
Nathan moaned, thankful he didn't have his Serge on, which would have only amplified the heat he could now feel rising from his face!
The exact same face he was now not so discreetly trying his best to cover.
No, it's not just me! Everyone says so, Dad! And I mean everyone in Hope Valley!"
"Young Lady, you'd better eat your Dinner or no dessert for you!"
"I love you, Dad."
"I love you, too, Allison Rose, even though you're incredibly precocious!"
"What does that mean?"
Well, tonight it means I love you a Bushel and a Peck and even more!" he raised his eyebrows for emphasis, displaying that lop-sided grin Allie loved so much.
Allie laughed.
"How about twenty Bushels and Pecks too?"
"Absolutely! I'll even up you to forty on a good day," he teased.
She giggled, as her Dad got serious and reached for her hand.
"And so much more, Allie. So very much more. Every single day is made so much brighter with you in it, and don't you ever forget that, Daughter…"
(*59) "All's fair in love and war," Merriam Webster Dictionary, Public Domain
(*60) "God Moves in a Mysterious Way," Hymn, "Light Shining Out of Darkness," Poem, William Cowper, 1773, Public Domain
