A/N: As always, thanks to Julie, my sweet beta!
So we are jumping ahead! Four years. This puts us in late Spring of 1999, in case you like to know these things. :)
Thank you to all my readers and reviewers!
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A Change In Me
Chapter Four
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Sophia looked at me with wide brown eyes. "Mommy? You okay?"
I blinked rapidly as I turned back to her. "Yeah, Sophie, Mommy just thought she saw someone she knew." I gave her a bright smile, but inside my mind was racing. "You almost finished, sweetie?"
She nodded her head vigorously, causing her dark curls to bounce up and down. "Uh-huh, I just got three more bites." She held her sticky fingers up showing me three fingers and then giggled loudly at something only a three-year-old would find entertaining.
I shook my head at her silly laughter and then stole one little piece of chicken from her plate. "Now you only have two!"
She giggled again, patting her little knee like it was the most hilarious thing ever. Nothing boosted my mood like Sophia when she was like that. I quickly forgot about him, and I focused all my attention on my beautiful little girl.
"Oh, Mommy! You so funny!" She shook her head at me like I had just done to her a moment ago. She popped her last two bites of chicken in her mouth, chewing each one slowly like Mom had been teaching her to do.
"Okay, my little bug, let's get going." I stood her up and brushed off her bright red dress, her favorite. I grabbed a wet-wipe from my bag and cleaned off her mouth, cheeks, and then each finger.
Once we made it outside, I couldn't help but look around. I knew I had seen Joe. I kept my eyes scanning the area as we headed towards home, probably looking like some kind of paranoid criminal. Thankfully, Sophia could rattle along with or without my paying attention, so I let her ramble about everything her little mind came up with as we walked down the street. This allowed me to be on the lookout for him. The last thing I was prepared to do was face Joe Morelli.
What had I been thinking?
This thought was running through my head on repeat, getting louder each time. How could I have not told him about her? I knew he had come back from the Navy – months ago! But when I didn't see him around town or hear any more about him, I simply buried my head a little further into the sand. I had been telling myself for years that I would simply wait until he was home and I could tell him in person. The problem with that was it basically put me off of even thinking about Joe and what this would mean for him to discover that he had a daughter. It was a convenient way for me to avoid dealing with him altogether. Well, as much as my broken heart had let me forget. But the last year or so, I had pretty much pushed all thoughts of Joe out of my mind. I felt like reality had just ambushed me, and my heart was pounding loudly in my ears.
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While I was still reeling from seeing Joe, Sophia and I walked past a pet store, and she tugged repeatedly on my hand.
"You said after, Mommy! You said," she demanded as she yanked really hard on my arm.
"Ow! Sophie, don't hurt Mommy, or you're gonna go without dessert tonight." I stared down at her.
She glared at me and stomped her little foot. "You said!"
I crouched down in front of her. "I know. I said. Mommy was just thinking, bug. You need to be patient. Okay?"
She nodded, a slight look of guilt on her face, but also I could see she was desperate to go inside the store.
"All right, but remember we can't get a pet until we move out of Grammy and Grampy's."
She pouted out her lips. "I know. Grampy said no."
She sighed wistfully, but she was quickly distracted once we were inside and could see the large pen of puppies on the floor. She shrieked in excitement, turning the heads of several patrons, and then ran over to the puppies.
I leaned over the side of the pen and pulled one out. "Sophia, calm down. You're going to scare him." I cradled the wiggling little puppy to my chest. "See, he's starting to relax." I stroked his head and smiled as she joined me.
"Please, Mommy? Can I hold him? Please?" she whispered.
"Here you go," I said softly to keep her in this rare somber state.
She gently took the puppy and then started to cry as she rocked him back and forth. "I wanna take him home."
The other adults looked at me like I was a terrible mother, teasing my small child. But I knew my daughter. She could cry at the drop of a hat. She also could be easily distracted most of the time. She had inherited my sweet tooth, and as much as I hated it, I wasn't above using that to manipulate her.
I let her rock the puppy and tell him all about how much she wanted him and loved him and would name him whatever Grampy wanted as long she could keep him. After a few minutes of the love-fest, the puppy decided to pee on her. I tried to wrangle him away from her quickly, but the damage was done. There was pee on her favorite dress. Much to my dismay, I was realizing more and more that I was raising my mother. It must be a Mazur family curse – I'm sure my mom would agree. Sophia shrieked again, but this time she actually was upset. She was almost inconsolable as I scooped her up and deposited the puppy back in the pen.
"Bad puppy! Bad! Bad! Bad!" she yelled over my shoulder between sobs. "I don't want you no more!" I rubbed her back as I headed back out the door.
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I was so distracted with trying to calm Sophia down; I didn't notice the man heading our way.
"Oh, I'm so sorry," I said after I almost knocked him over. "We had an accident." I nodded to my weeping daughter, clinging to my neck.
He smiled at me warmly. He looked to be in his mid to late twenties. He had sandy brown hair and dark blue eyes. He was cute, in a boyish kind of way. "Accidents happen. In fact, that's what I do. Dickie Orr, prosecuting attorney, specializing in accidents." He flashed me a charming grin.
"Stephanie Plum. Student and Mother, specializing in accident clean-ups." I smiled at him.
"Nice to meet you. And who is this lovely little creature that you have with you?" He seemed genuinely interested and not at all freaked out that I had a kid.
"This is Sophia. She's upset about her favorite dress. I think I might have to throw it away." I winked at him.
"Mommy! No! It's fine. It's just a little pee-pee. Grammy can get it out." She blinked her large teary eyes at me. Then she looked up at Dickie and immediately became the sweet and shy version of herself that only came out around strange men. She lowered her head back to my neck, but she kept her face turned towards Dickie this time.
He gave her a smile, but she only nuzzled into me more. "It's nice to meet you, Sophia. And I think your Grammy can definitely save your dress."
She bit her lip and smiled, but then she turned back to looking over my shoulder.
"She's not normally this shy," I explained. "But she's not met very many men that are not family."
His face froze for a moment and I noticed he glanced quickly at my hands, looking for a ring. He relaxed the smallest amount when he found none. "Well, maybe I shouldn't be a stranger," he said with some reservation still in his voice.
"Maybe you shouldn't," I answered flirtatiously.
I couldn't believe I was flirting with him. And in front of Sophia! I never allowed her to meet the men I dated – not that there were that many. Most men my age were in college, boys really, getting drunk and screwing as many girls as they could. Not the kind of man I was interested in. But Dickie was older and had a real job. And he didn't seem to care that I had a child.
"Can I give you my card, Stephanie?"
"Yes, that would be great."
He fished in his pocket and then pulled out a card. "I just started working for this attorney. I'm more of a junior prosecutor. I don't want you to think I was lying."
I laughed. "You're still an attorney, right?" I took the card and placed it in my back pocket, a much easier place to reach than my bag with Sophia still hanging on me like a monkey.
"Well, yeah."
"You can't have been out of school that long."
"No. Just eight months actually." He smiled brightly. "And you? You're a student? What are you studying?"
"Nursing."
"That's a great field to get into." He looked awkward for a moment, unsure of what he wanted to say. "Did you have to … take time off to have Sophia?"
Oh. He wanted to know how old I was. I didn't blame him. I used to be so embarrassed about my age, but I have had a great mentor who has helped me get over it.
"No, I had her in high school." I held his gaze, looking for judgment. "I've been really lucky that my parents let us stay and pretty much insisted that I go to school. I haven't been able to go full time, but I am almost done with my last requirements."
He took a deep breath. "That's really impressive. You're … uh … really young to have so much on your plate."
I tried to keep a brave face as I thought he probably wanted that card back right now. "It wasn't my plan, but I am managing. And she's worth it."
He shook his head. "Of course she is. I'm sorry, Stephanie." Here it comes. "It's just … I'm twenty-eight. I'm looking for … " He blushed. "I guess I want you to know that I am looking for something serious. I've done the whole dating thing. I'm not into casual anymore."
I blinked at him. "I don't do casual, Dickie. At least not in front of her."
Sophia chose that moment to return to the conversation. "Mommy, I wanna go home."
"Of course, bug. Tell Dickie goodbye."
She buried her face back in my neck.
"Sorry." I shrugged my free shoulder.
"It's okay. Like I said," he paused and looked me in the eyes. "Maybe she needs to get to know me better – after her mommy does of course."
I felt a grin break across my face. "That sounds good. I'll give you a call then?"
"I hope so. Bye, Sophia. Nice to meet you." He laughed at her lack of response. "Looking forward to hearing from you, Stephanie."
I blushed. "Okay then. Bye, Dickie."
I turned quickly before I said something to ruin everything. After another block, Sophia agreed to walk the rest of the way back to Grammy and Grampy's.
On the rest of the way home, I remembered that Joe was somewhere in town. Ugh! I felt nauseous just thinking about him. I had seen him getting into a car, so at least he wasn't on foot. More likely he was long gone from where we were. Also, I was glad we didn't have to walk past his mom's house to get home. And it wasn't the first time I had noticed that either. The very few times I had seen his family members always made me feel guilty about keeping her from them. But only his mother probably would have cared, and I often justified my choice with the thought that she had several other grandchildren already.
I had no idea how Joe was going to react to my news, but I knew that I wanted to at least tell him before anyone else. I wasn't even sure I wanted him in our lives at this point, but I wouldn't keep her from him if he wanted to know her. But I also wouldn't force her into his life either. No. Ultimately, it was going to be up to Joe.
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OoOoO
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The mystery of Sophia's father had kept me in the Burg gossip for all of my pregnancy and even the first six months or so after she was born. Some were holding out on seeing the baby to make their decision. Fortunately, she looked a lot like me except her hair and eye color. I had cried when her dark blue eyes had turned brown. I hadn't known that almost all babies have blue eyes at birth. I had wanted her to look exactly like me at the time. It was easier to stay in denial that she had a father without any visual reminders. Now, I couldn't imagine her any other way.
I attended Mercer County Community College. No Rutgers for me. Not with Sophia to take care of. I had even considered Douglas College, but taking the train every day was just something I couldn't imagine doing with a one-year-old at home. My parents gave me Val's car since she was getting a new car with her then fiancé. So it was much faster to stay local and just drive myself to school. I was finally in the last stages of getting my degree. It was only an Associate's Degree, but I could still take my exams to become an RN. I had been accepted into a paid internship that I hoped would turn into a job if I continued to do well. They would be letting me know in the next few weeks if I was hired. I had also continued working at the Tasty Pastry to at least be able to pay for some of my expenses, but I had cut my hours back to weekends since I started the internship. I hadn't really saved up that much, but my dad never would take any money from me over the years.
My parents had really been wonderful. I had definitely shamed them with my teenage pregnancy, but once the shock wore off they had united behind me, determined to not let me become another statistic. And I think they really had hurt for me too. At the time it was hard for me to see that, but now as a parent, I truly appreciate how difficult it must have been for them to watch me suffer. And it had been suffering. Not only was I treated like an outcast or a slut, partly in thanks to Joe's graffiti, but also I was completely broken-hearted. And they never even knew that part. They actually seemed relieved that the father was some stranger from a party. They thought it was easier to not have to share the baby and me with anyone else. I agreed with them, and at seventeen I still wanted them to have control over what was happening. I also never told anyone, not even Mary Lou, the truth about Joe and me. It made it seem easier to forget him if I never even had to say his name.
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OoOoO
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I called Dickie a few days later. I hadn't been this nervous about a man since … maybe ever. I had to leave him a message, but a part of me was relieved. That way, it was completely in his hands. But the rest of the evening, I drove everyone crazy with my jumpiness.
The phone rang at ten, and my father lifted one brow at me from his easy chair in the family room.
"What?"
"It's not just you anymore."
I gaped at him. "I think I am well aware of that, Dad. Dickie is older, more mature. He's not intimidated about me being a mother."
Dad frowned. "How much older?"
"Twenty-eight! What do you think? I met someone at your lodge?"
He paled. "That's not even funny, Stephanie. You better get that phone from your mother if you don't want her scaring him away." He smiled.
I burst into the kitchen just in time.
"So you're an attorney?" Mom asked seriously. "That's really something, Dickie. Do you own or rent?"
I snatched the phone from her hands and glared at her as I shooed her out of the kitchen. She must really want this to work since I don't think I have ever seen her so willingly leave her domain. I waited until the door swung shut before I turned back to the phone.
"Hello? Mrs. Plum?" Dickie asked into the phone.
"Hi, it's Stephanie. I apologize for anything inappropriate my mother may have said."
He laughed. "She's fine, Stephanie. Nothing to worry about."
"Oh good," I sighed. "She means well. But she still likes to control my life."
"Well, you're still young – I mean, you're still her daughter."
I frowned into the phone. "Dickie, I'm twenty-one. I know that I'm young, but I'm not your typical twenty-one-year-old. I work, I go to school, I raise my beautiful little girl. I'm not just looking for a good time. My time is far too precious. If you can't get past our age difference, then maybe we should just –"
"Stephanie, you … you are an amazing woman. I respect you for all those things you just said. And I have no problems with you being younger than me."
"Oh. Okay then."
"Let me take you out this weekend. Friday or Saturday. Whatever works with your schedule."
"Saturday is good. I work in the afternoon, but I think I can convince Mom or Grandma to take Sophia for the evening."
When I laid down to go to sleep, my mind was filled with excitement about my upcoming date with Dickie. There was something very charming about him. He seemed so confidant, and I liked that. I also really believed that he wasn't upset or concerned about our age difference. That really put my mind at ease. I wasn't sure what I wanted, but I knew that whatever man I brought into my life had to be good enough for Sophia. Dad was exactly right about it not being just me. I was aware of that fact every day.
I started to drift off as I thought about what Dickie might be like on a date. But pretty soon, his dark blue eyes morphed into the warm brown ones that greeted me every morning. And soon his hair turned dark. And then I was back in high school, anticipating anything to do with Joe Morelli.
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OoOoO
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On Saturday, I drove Sophia over to Grandpa and Grandma Mazur's house at six. I still worked at the Tasty Pastry. Saturdays were crazy days at the bakery, but my boss, Big Red, was a softy and wanted me to meet a "good man". She let me leave early so I could see my little bug before taking her to her great-grandparents for the night. Grandma Mazur even offered to keep her overnight. Apparently, as awful as it was for me to get pregnant in high school, my Grandma – and I think my mother – were all for letting me have an all night date with Dickie. I think they already had our china patterns picked out.
Sophia was wiggling around in her car seat, singing some made up song about clouds as we drove the five blocks from home. I had forgotten almost completely about seeing Joe last week. My ability to stay in denial is somewhat astounding, and I had decided to make sure Joe was back for good before looking him up. But I wasn't so careless to not drive the long way to avoid his mother's house. If he was still around, I didn't want to see him. Or maybe I didn't want him to see her.
"Mama, I miss you." She smiled sweetly at me through the rear-view mirror. I sighed. She only rarely called me mama anymore. Usually when she was sleepy.
"I'll miss you too, Sophie. But you will have so much fun with Nana and Papa."
"I knoooow," she sang again. "I know I loooove you! Little bitty Mama! I love you toooooo, clouds!" She was off in her own world again. I shook my head and tried not to let the tears in my eyes fall down my cheeks.
Grandma stood in the doorway when we pulled up. She already had a towel tied around her shoulders. And as she zigzagged her way to the car, she held her arms out like she was flying.
"Nana!" Sophia squealed in delight. "Mommy, get me out! Get me out! Get me out!"
"Okay. Okay." I jumped from the car, relieved that she was at least staying in her car seat. We had recently had a serious discussion about her waiting for an adult to let her out. "Hi, Grandma!" I waved and she saluted me. I quickly unbuckled Sophia from her car seat and placed her on the ground. She took off running towards Grandma, who produced another towel and draped it around Sophia's tiny shoulders.
I watched the two of them flitting around the yard for a moment, pretending to be fairies this time. I wasn't about to point out to them that fairies had wings, not capes.
Grandpa stood in the door with his walker. His health was failing, and he was more and more reliant on Grandma to get around. I had overheard Mom on the phone recently, telling Grandma to consider hiring some help. I already came over a few mornings each week to help out, but I wasn't going to have the time to help him like he was going to need in the near future. My heart tightened as I walked towards him.
"Hey, Grandpa. How are you feeling? You up for a night with Sophia."
He smiled broadly at me. "She's got nothing on your grandmother. Come here, Steph. Give me a hug."
I quickly placed Sophia's bag down and gently hugged him across the walker. Grandpa was the most affectionate person in the entire family. He always had been. The one thing I loved about having Sophia so young was that she really had time to get to know my grandparents as well. I helped him back into the house, leaving the fairies outside to defend their magical kingdom.
On my way home from Grandma's I drove by the Morelli's house. It's not as if I hadn't ever driven by there since having Sophia, but in general I only drove past if someone else was with Sophia and me or I was alone. I tried not to stare too long into the windows as I slowed down. I knew if anyone was watching, which being in the Burg almost guaranteed, they would immediately start to talk about what I was doing. It wasn't worth the risk, but suddenly I just wanted to see him. Even a glimpse of him would do. It sometimes felt like he wasn't real and what we had shared was only a dream. That is until that dream crawled into bed with me and begged for breakfast every morning. No. I could never really forget what had happened. Even without Sophia, Joe would always be my first love. Even before I fell in love with him, I wanted him more than I had ever wanted anything in my entire life.
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Dickie picked me up at seven. I noticed that his car was fairly new and expensive. I admired it as we walked out to it. He pulled the door open for me and smiled.
"My parents gave it to me for passing the bar."
"Oh? It's really nice."
"Thanks. It's my one luxury right now." He leaned down to me. "Besides seeing you."
I blushed at him and quickly got into the car.
Dickie was very sweet, and a bit more flirtatious than I expected. But it had been so long since I had that kind of attention. I relished every wink, smile, and gentle brush of his fingers against my skin. He had no problems touching me, but he kept it respectful.
We ate dinner at a fancy new restaurant in the city. I was surprised when he headed into town. He said he wanted to show me the town and figured I could use some real "adult" time. I couldn't agree more. It had been months since I had been on a date.
After dinner, Dickie suggested we go down the block to a club that had live jazz music. I gladly took his arm as we made our way down the city street.
The club was smoke-filled, so I asked if we could sit on the patio. You could still hear the music just fine. Dickie liked the idea of having a little more privacy. Only twenty minutes after we found ourselves a secluded seat, Dickie leaned into me and kissed me softly. It was really nice, and for the first time in over three years, I actually thought I might want something more. Dickie made it very clear that he wanted to see me again, and I gladly accepted another date for the next Saturday.
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OoOoO
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The following Friday night, Valerie and her husband had invited the family to dinner at their house. Steven was an okay guy. I didn't really see him as the perfect man that Val saw him as. I thought he was sometimes extremely arrogant, but he was very successful and he seemed to make my sister happy.
I sat next to Sophia in the back of my parents' car as we made our way out to the suburbs where Val lived.
My mom turned back and looked at me excitedly. "I think they have a special announcement."
I lifted my brows at her. "You do?"
"She's been acting funny on the phone. And she didn't come over for breakfast the other day like she usually does."
Sophia looked over at me and handed me her favorite toy, a stuffed ladybug. "Here, Mommy. Hold Lady for me."
I took the toy and tapped her nose with my finger. "Are you sure, bug? You trust me with Lady?"
"She's my bug. I'm your bug. Does that make me her mommy?" She asked with wide eyes.
My dad chuckled from the front seat. "Don't make me a great-grandpa yet, Sophie!" he teased. "I don't think I could handle that."
She giggled. "You are great, Grampy." She did her little knee slap once we all laughed at her comment. God, I loved her.
Mom turned back to Dad. "I think you might be a grandpa again, Frank. I think Val's pregnant." She smiled proudly at me and then faced the front again.
Mom was right. As usual. Valerie and Steven were beaming throughout the entire dinner. Mom kept giving me discreet looks and winks as the evening progressed. And at dessert, Valerie carried out a cake in the shape of a baby bottle, announcing that she was due in November. Mom and Dad both hugged them and congratulated them. Sophia didn't understand at first. But once she realized that she would get a new playmate, then all was right in her world.
A swift stab of pain surprised me as I watched them all happily celebrating my sister's pregnancy. I had always had issues with feeling less than Valerie. But this was different. I knew Val wanted to have kids. I knew that it was going to happen sooner than later. And I was truly happy for her. But I felt so … lonely. She was having a baby with her husband. Everyone was thrilled for them. She got to tell them the joyous news with pride. Not like I had. Not through my tears of shame, sitting on the floor of the bathroom.
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OoOoO
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Dickie picked me up one Wednesday afternoon from the hospital where I was working. We had gone out four times over the last few weeks, and I was really starting to like him. Wednesdays were the best days for me to leave for a long lunch. I started early and could make up my time by staying late. I often met up with Mary Lou for lunch so we could catch up. I smiled at Nurse Smiller on my way out.
"You coming back in an hour?" she said over the charts in her hand.
"Maybe a little longer today. Is that okay?"
"Sure." She wrote down a few things and then looked up quickly. "This is your new man, right?"
"Well…" I rolled my eyes. "I guess, but we aren't officially exclusive or anything."
"Oh, Stephanie, that's so great. It's about time you put yourself out there."
"Thanks, Anna. I better get going." I waved at her as I headed into the elevator.
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Dickie was standing in the front of the main entrance, waiting for me.
"Hey, beautiful."
"Hey yourself. Although I don't feel so beautiful in these scrubs."
He grabbed my hand and smiled. "I like them. I think they make you look cute."
"Wow. So I've already been demoted from beautiful to cute in just one minute."
He stopped walking and turned to face me. "I think you could look beautiful in anything, Stephanie." He leaned forward and kissed me briefly. "What sounds good for lunch?"
"There's a great Mexican place close by. Is that good?"
"Sure." He didn't seem too happy about that.
"There's also a diner."
"That sounds good. It's up to you. I chose the other night." He squeezed my hand and opened the car door for me.
I sat in the car and waited for him to join me. "We can go to the diner. I like their food too." He didn't know they delivered our lunches all the time. And I wanted to make him happy.
I liked Dickie, and it was the first time I had felt something more than lust towards a man since Sophia came along. Not that I ever acted on it. I only slept with one other guy after Rick. And it was horrible. I almost cried through the whole thing. Of course, it was at Valerie's wedding. I had just stopped breast-feeding Sophia and could finally indulge in a little alcohol. I didn't get drunk – I don't think that was something I ever would do again. But I did meet one of my new brother-in-law's distant cousins at the open bar. We hit it off and … well, one thing led to another. I ended up in his hotel room, missing my baby girl and mourning the fact that I never would have a white wedding with the man I loved. Ted seemed oblivious to my distress, and he didn't even slow down once the tears were leaking down my cheeks onto his pillow. I think he even made some offhanded remark about being so good I cried in pleasure. I didn't stay for five minutes once it was done. I couldn't get away quick enough. I drove straight to Grandma and Grandpa Mazur's to see Sophia, waking them all up in the middle of the night. But it was worth it. I needed to breathe her sweet scent and feel her soft little body clinging to me. She was what made me try every day to make something of myself.
Finally, after years of working so hard and sacrificing almost all of my social life, I was so close to moving into the next phase of my future. I planned on working for at least a few months before we moved out. I would so much rather move out immediately, but Stephanie the mother didn't act so impulsively. I knew I would be much less stressed if I saved up some more money before. Sophia would be turning four in September. That was in three months. It would have been nice to have her birthday party at our new place, but I wasn't sure if I wanted to change the plans.
And now that Dickie was in the picture, I had to figure out how long to wait before Sophia would meet him again.
I watched him as he made the short drive to the diner. He looked very in charge, all the time. I think I liked that about him since I felt so out of control most of the time. Part of it was still living with my parents while trying to be a parent. I always felt like two people. The daughter and the mother. My mother wanted Dickie to come to dinner as soon as next week. But I wanted to wait until I knew for sure where this was going. My daughter came first, and I wasn't about to confuse her with introducing her to the men in my life. Because even if things didn't work out with Dickie, Anna was right in that I needed to get back out there.
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Dickie led me to a booth, his hand on the back of my waist. I smiled at the intimate gesture. It made me feel like we were really there together as a couple, not just two people sharing a lunch.
Dickie grabbed the menu and looked up at me. "Do you like catfish?"
"Um… yeah. I think so."
"I've heard they have the best catfish sandwiches here."
"You've been here?" I wondered why didn't he mention that before.
"Once or twice. I didn't work far from here when I was with the DA. But now that I'm at Kreiner and Kreiner, I don't make it this way too often."
I thought I detected a hint of judgment in that statement about this part of town. I knew it wasn't the best area, but it was far from the war zone better known as Stark Street.
"How long have you been with them?"
"Just a couple months. I was really lucky to get in with them. They're an old firm, long line of family attorneys. And they also are old money. Lots of great connections and they get the best cases."
I nodded as I sipped on my coke. "Well, that sounds promising then."
"It is. And Mr. Kreiner has been very welcoming, very … guiding."
"Oh. Like too much guidance?"
"No. He just wants a well-respected firm. We are all expected to represent him well, both at work and at home."
I smiled. "I can see that. Most employers don't want to worry about their workers doing something to potentially destroy their reputation."
"No, of course not. But it's a little more than that. We're expected to be part of his social sphere, and there are certain expectations that go along with that."
I narrowed my eyes at him for a moment, but then the waitress appeared to take our orders.
Dickie folded his menu, and looked up at her. "We'll both take the catfish special."
"Alrighty then," she said and turned away.
I frowned at him, still somewhat distracted about the comment he made before.
"Steph, it just means that I can't fool around. If I date someone, it needs to be headed somewhere. They would like to see me settled down."
My eyes widened a little. That's where I had been going too, but it seemed so outdated. Surely, people didn't think like that still, did they?
He continued, "I really like you, but I just wanted you to know that I am serious about seeing you. I would like to see where this is going, but I really am looking for a wife. Is that something you can consider doing in the near future? Getting married? I know you have a lot on your plate right now with finishing school and with Sophia."
I blinked at him. "I .. uh … well, I do want to get married. I hadn't really thought much about it though to be honest. I have been so focused on Sophia. I haven't dated much, Dickie. This just seems like a big change to go from not even dating to maybe getting married."
He laughed. "Well, I'm not proposing right now, so you can relax. And I'm glad you haven't been dating. It shows a true commitment to your child and your education."
I blushed for some reason. I felt like my dad was complimenting me for a second.
He reached over the table and took my hand. "Let's just see how it goes. No pressure, Stephanie. I just thought you should know where I am coming from."
"Thank you. I appreciate your being candid. And I do like you too, Dickie."
He smiled his boyish grin. "I thought you might. And I think we could be really great together."
"I think so too," I admitted.
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It wasn't until much later in the day that I realized I never addressed his ordering for me. It had really bothered me that he didn't even ask afterwards if that was okay. But I had been so caught up in his revelation of looking for a wife. Wow. A wife. I sighed as I thought about that. Deep down, I wanted it. I wanted what Valerie had. But I still wanted to be me. I still wanted to work. I would have to ask Dickie about what kind of wife he was looking for. I wasn't interested in being someone's trophy.
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