Author's Note: Without spoiling too much, I will share that the road ahead will not be fluffy for our pair just yet. I've endeavored to stay within the boundaries of canon mostly, but as some reviewers mentioned, the show doesn't give us a very satisfying resolution for T/T'P, so I may have to cross those boundaries to serve the development of the relationship. Wherever this story leads, it will deviate from canon and ignore These Are The Voyages, which I don't consider canon--merely a cosplaying romp in the holodeck for Riker and Troi. Reader be warned, things will be taking a turn...

Chapter 3

He was halfway through Kelby's engineering logs. Engineering had evidently been uneventful in his absence, but he had a nagging feeling he was missing something. Kelby's logs were dry reading and lacked insight, but in fairness the events cataloged were mostly mundane; An EPS grid malfunction that had been repaired beneath his standard, a fluctuation in the containment field that he could easily adjust, and a transporter malfunction in which rock samples containing unusual elements adhered to the ceiling of the transporter pad upon materializing. That one piqued his interest. He'd have asked T'Pol about the scientific principles involved, but that would require him to attempt to talk to her again and after last night, he did not feel ready to venture down that tangled and twisted path. Commander Tucker yawned as he continued to plod his way through the reports. He noticed that Ensign Masaro's name figured more than once in an unfavorable light as he read through the logs. Masaro had never been a gifted engineer. Tucker had chewed him out more than once about his lackadaisical attitude, but he was surprised to read that the young ensign had abandoned his post and had been nowhere to be found on several of his shifts of late which had resulted in Kelby assigning him to the graveyard shift. He'd speak with him to see what was going on. In the meantime, he would finish reading these damn logs–anything to keep him from thinking about last night.

Enterprise was closing in on its destination and the bridge crew was scheduled to appear at the opening remarks at the conference in San Francisco. Starfleet had made it clear that their participation was not optional. Their goal to found a Coalition of Planets was the primary focus and they were to be at the disposal of Starfleet Command upon their arrival in whatever form that took. Commander Tucker would have preferred to be overseeing the repairs to Enterprise instead of babysitting a bunch of crotchety diplomats and what's worse, he was well aware he would be forced to stand next to her for long periods and he wasn't sure that was a good idea right now. He never understood how one woman could intoxicate him and exasperate him at the same time. He sighed heavily. He loved this woman more than life itself, but communication was not their strong suit. Still, it was probably better to resolve some of these issues before the conference. The last thing they needed was for the tension between them to be scrutinized for a televised audience. He reached out tentatively in the bond. Maybe he could gain some insight into her feelings about last night before they were thrown together in service of their duties. He was still learning how to access the bond at will and he was much less skilled in doing so than T'Pol was, still he was making progress and if he focused all of his concentration on the bond, he found he was able to visualize her. As he looked deeper inward, he could see the outline of her slender frame hunched over the display screen in her quarters. He smiled tenderly when he saw she was engrossed in her reading, seemingly oblivious to his mental presence. He wondered what she was reading that held her attention so raptly, though his smile faded quickly when he observed that whatever was on the screen was causing her distress. He could not discern the words on the screen through their collective consciousness, but he noted the letters were in Vulcan. It was then he felt her raise her mental shields upon detecting his presence, something he was irritatingly familiar with, and not for the first time, he felt how patently unfair it was that she had this ability and he did not. The haze between them was thick and he could barely visualize her through the dense mental fog, but still he could make out her distorted silhouette. He strained, increasing his focus on the bond until he felt stabbing pain in his head and a white, hot light seared across his visual field. Ignoring the pain, he persisted. He needed to know what was upsetting his mate. He could feel rather than see a cloud of mental intensity looming thickly about her. She was clearly disturbed and he knew with certainty that this was a deeply personal matter. He respected her privacy, but he was damn well not going to stand by when she was in obvious pain. The last thing he could make out was that her hands were balled into fists and she was trembling with rage. Trip watched as she drew in a deep breath and allowed a single thought to slip through the bond unintentionally. The momentary lapse was enough of a window for Trip to see who the letter was from. Not long ago, he had spent more than enough time helplessly obsessing over this person–and thinking of the myriad ways he'd like to hurt him. Koss. Immediately he knew the communique was from him and that was enough for him, her privacy be damned. He rose from his chair and stormed out of Engineering, a man with a purpose, earning him several curious looks in the process from his subordinates.

His legs were burning by the time he reached her quarters. They hadn't fully healed and he was pushing them beyond their limits, but he didn't care. He needed to see her.

Sparing a cursory few seconds to be certain no one had seen him outside her door in this state, he pressed the door chime impatiently. She was expecting him.

"Come in."

The velvet sound of her voice and the act of walking through her door recalled the last time he had done so to have a discussion and the heated images of the aftermath of that discussion began to enter his mind uninvited. He couldn't afford the distraction–not when Koss was involved. Pushing the intimate thoughts aside, he moved straight for his bondmate and positioned himself directly in front of her.

"What does he want? Koss. I know he contacted you," he demanded, his heart nearly beating out of his chest.

T'Pol inhaled deeply before speaking, "It would be better if we discussed this later." Her control was tenuous at best and she knew it would not be nearly enough to sustain both of them for this conversation.

At this deflection, his agitation began to markedly increase if that were even possible. He could feel his nostrils flare as he worked to steady his breath and remain calm. Someone needed to.

"T'Pol, I can feel your rage and it is making me want to tear something or someone apart. Let me help. You have to let me in," He said through gritted teeth, imploring her to talk to him.

Of course, he had detected her failure to maintain her composure through the bond and as a result, she would be forced to deal with his emotional tirade when she was barely able to control her own thoughts at the moment.

Trying to deflect once more, she asked as she rose from her chair, "This is not an opportune time. I'm due to be on Bridge duty in several minutes and the Captain needs to discuss the arrangements for the conference." She held his gaze calmly with a level of tranquility she didn't actually feel at the moment. In fact, she felt quite the opposite, she willed her heartbeat in the side of her abdomen to slow.

He stared at her in disbelief as she switched off the display on her desk and left the room as if nothing had happened without another word. Seething, he followed her down the corridor, but she had already entered the lift and the doors closed behind her before he could enter. He tried to reach across the bond, but again, it was sealed off to him, a wall she had erected between them.

Tucker recognized when he was backed into a corner. There was nothing he could do but wait. He headed back to Engineering ready to work himself to the brink of exhaustion. It was all he knew how to do when she was like this.


Tucker's upper body was deep inside the panel of part of the EPS grid, fixing the slipshod work that had been done in his absence. Holding his pocket light beneath his teeth, he used the spanner to continue to adjust the components. His arms were covered in grease and his legs lay splayed out on the deck plating of Engineering. He had no idea of the time and he didn't care as he had been in a similar state for hours. His back ached and his arms felt like dead weight from maintaining the same position for far too long. Working through the pain was good though. It afforded him less mental capacity to focus on the current state of his relationship. Physical pain would subside at some point at least. He heard the footfalls enter the vicinity, but kept working. Suddenly, he heard a throat clear–probably Kelby or some Ensign. He snapped at the noise, "Can't you see I'm working?"

Another throat clear--this time, more pointed. Extricating himself swiftly from the inside of the panel he prepared to lace into whoever it was who disturbed him. His eyes widened when he saw Captain Archer and Admiral Gardner taking in his appearance in his current state. He scrambled to attention as quickly as his sore back and stiff, injured legs would permit.

"Captain. Admiral." Trip coughed, his arms clasped behind him. He hoped he didn't appear as bedraggled as he felt.

"At ease, Commander," Archer instructed, brow furrowed as he looked his friend over. Trip was quite a sight to behold. His hair was caked in debris and he had a streak of grease marking his face. Moreover, he recognized the familiar dark circles under his eyes. He remembered that look all too often in the Expanse. The Captain had been so occupied with the plans for this conference, he hadn't had time to check in with Trip. He had barely seen him since he found out he was going to be alright after he had recovered from the away mission. Internally, he admonished himself. He knew his Chief Engineer had been through hell and back. He should have been there. He would make it up to him after the conference. Perhaps they could share a few beers while they caught up with the latest water polo matches.

Tucker's disheveled state did not escape the notice of Admiral Gardner either. "Captain Archer was gracious enough to be my guide. I wanted to personally thank the crew for their dedication. Starfleet wouldn't be here today without you, Commander and the rest of the crew of this ship."

"Commander Tucker has been an integral part of our success, Admiral. His work ethic and expertise is unparalleled, but sometimes he needs a reminder to take a break," he emphasized.

Trip took the hint. "Aye, sir. I was just finishing up here."

The Captain nodded slowly, deep in thought. He handed Trip a PADD. "Glad to hear that, Commander. Get cleaned up and stop by T'Pol's quarters and bring her this. It has the arrangements for tonight's dinner reception. Tell her I want the two of you to join us for dinner at the Captain's table. Samuels will be joining us as well." Jon didn't have to tell Trip how important it was for this dinner to go well.

"Let me just put this panel back together," Trip began, but then thought the better of it. The Captain might as well have been staring through him.

"I'll just have Ensign Masaro take over," Trip finished and with that being that response he was looking for, Jon nodded and gave him a small smile, "Dismissed, Commander."

Tucker made his way to the Ensign whom he found sitting alone at a console. When Trip approached, Masaro quickly switched his display to avoid his Chief from seeing what was on his screen. Had Trip not been exhausted, it was something that would not have escaped his notice, but as it was, he had worked clearly through his entire shift and well into the next one without pause. He wondered how he had managed to evade T'Pol's attention. Ordinarily, she'd have been there in his head like clockwork the minute his shift had ended with a stern warning. As much as he wanted her to stop nagging him, he had the suspicion that her not having done so was not not a good sign. They had so much to resolve and now he had to sit across from her for dinner all night and pretend everything was normal? He could no longer avoid it. He had to see her.

Giving explicit instructions to Masaro, he was sure even the inept ensign could not screw this one up and felt confident the panel would be replaced correctly. He left Engineering and felt his confidence steadily decrease as he made his way to his quarters. He knew better than to test her nasal inhibitor by not showering first. He was sure he needed one. When he reached his quarters, he undressed, placing his soiled uniform aside. It looked like it had been battle-stained. The quartermaster was not going to be happy. He was constantly scolding Trip who seemed to have a penchant for ruining a perfectly good uniform in record time. He gently tested the bond and found it open to his surprise. She was there in the white space, eyes closed and breathing deeply. She must have been meditating. He had the sense she was aware of his presence. He walked softly toward her and sat down in front of her, folding his legs in front of him. Here, they were not injured. Here, everything was easier for them.

We need to talk, Darling.

It is difficult to talk when one does not have the words for this.

Let me help. T'Pol, I love you. Whatever it is, we will get through it together. Don't shut me out.

She paused for a long time and searched her mate's expression, finding love and concern etched in his features.

There is nothing you can do to help and…

She struggled to finish her thoughts.

And? He prompted.

And I will lose you.

Not possible, Darling. I promised you I would never leave you and Tuckers always keep their word.

She had seen the inside of this man's mind and very well knew the regard he had for her. She contemplated what he had said for a time and made a decision.

Very well. Come to my quarters. This will need to be discussed in person.

He nodded solemnly and picked up the PADD the Captain had asked him to deliver to her and began walking towards her quarters, wondering what the universe had stirred up this time to keep them apart? No, he banished the thought from his mind. He refused to allow himself to entertain that idea for another second. He'd fought for her and nearly died for her and would do it a thousand times over. He was sure they could overcome anything the universe had in store. But the universe was a cold, dark place.