Note:
Thoughts in italics
I do not condone or encourage any behaviours in this story. It is simply a fictional story.
[Third Person POV]
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Natsu is insufferable as always, and Cana has an aha moment that her friend's taste in men is quite questionable. Don't ask her how the love letter Natsu wrote for Juvia ended up on the principal's table or how they got a detention for climbing the fences beyond the academy to sneak into a restricted area and crawling down a man-hole of all places. Cana had been bellyaching from the principal's room to their dorms as if she didn't know they were walking down a minefield of tutors and other officials waiting to explode on them at the slightest misbehaviour. While Cana and Natsu crossed swords, blaming each other for snitching, Juvia flailed her arms around to stop them from getting raucous, caught amidst the bangarang. When they stopped to catch their breaths, she rushed to quip that there must've been devices set up to alert the authorities should a breach happen.
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She didn't know how he got here but assumed he'd taken that shortcut with overgrown weeds nobody takes out of the fear of snake bites. It's a good thing Natsu was a dumdum. He wasn't afraid of petty things like dying a few times. His pants had patterns of golden fire erupting from the hem. They caught the light when he moved his feet, glistering in the sunshine from the open door. He liked looking hot, every inch the chic Magnolian. It doesn't matter that he's inside a girls' dorm, or if the RA ever caught sight of him, he'd be up a gum tree. However, the girls won't have a problem with that. Right? Cana hardly rolled her eyes, but Juvia failed to be indifferent. The dragon slayer thought she might berserk into steam if he dared to take another step forward. Her eyes were so big he feared it'd pop out of her skull.
"What are you doing here in your ridiculous bell-bottoms?" Really. She was making a fuss.
Natsu didn't seem to be listening as he went straight for the cookie jar on her table and dug his gigantic hands to take five puffy, sugary biscuits and stuff it all in his mouth. It didn't fit in. Standing up from her seat, Juvia was about to protest before Natsu held up a hand, "These are my pants. Not your panties. I've got a sense of style."
Juvia ignored him gorgeously, falling back on her couch to return to their Important conversation about elephants on national channels like they had nothing else to do. They had just finished their group project and had tacos when Natsu called them misers, whining about not feeding a hungry stomach.
"You just ate."
"Cookies are no substitute for barbecues."
"You say that again, I'll stake you, and then we'll have a barbecue." The water mage wasn't sure whether Cana was joking or not.
Natsu pulled a face. Aghast. "Cannibals! Cannibals!" He cried out to no one in particular.
"I'm pretty sure she was joking." Juvia forced out a snicker, her face twitching.
They're soon back to reciting the names of baby elephants: Sami, Doris and the like. Cana proclaimed that she watched Animal Earthland religiously (which is once a month.) The brunette introduced them to Juvia, fawning at how cute they were—going so far as to say they eat bananas, which nobody knew before. However, when she said, one day, she would go see them at the National Park miles deep into the northeast of Fiore, Juvia could not help but admire the card mage's sparky passion.
"Put on your elementary school uniform as well." Natsu teased, hands still inside the cookie jar, pretending it was stuck.
"I will," Cana replied with pleasure.
Other than elephants, they liked pandas. They're so fun when they roll down and all. Preening herself on the vanity mirror, Juvia rambles about the Big Panda plushie at the corner of the room, adding she goes to sleep every day, cuddling it.
Cana asks why the other doesn't let her inside her room, and the reply is a giggle. Because everyone from the brunette's father to her grandfather knew that Cana had a stealing problem. The brunette pouts and tells Juvia she will invade her room for a sleepover tonight.
"Stealing is like really bad. So NO."
"Yes."
"No, Cana-san wouldn't."
"Yes, Cana-san will."
"How old are you guys. 2?" Natsu snorts, on a mission to fill his mouth with whatever else that had the misfortune of meeting his gaze. "Playing with plushies."
She responds reasonably. "Juvia doesn't like people who hate plushies." She folded her arms, shaking her head, offended.
"Hai. Hai." Her friend supports the argument.
"Juvia, I'll be the gooddest boy inside your room!" He said with puppy dog eyes.
"Natsu-san doesn't have ulterior motives?" Her voice was childish, and Natsu stifled another snort.
"You're not going to live if you're suspicious of each person you meet." You see, wise words can come out of a stupid mouth. "Besides, I'm innocent." The corners of his eyes crinkle, betraying his act. He is met with an onslaught of pillow attacks. But The Slayer Of Pillow Fights, Natsu Dragneel, already had fire spurting in his palms. "I'm fired up. Gonna kick your ass. Losers."
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Fifteen minutes of pillow fight later, Cana found Juvia and Natsu concentrating on a book. Apparently, she shared his interest in sacred books about dragon queens riding dragons.
"What are you reading?"
"Holy Book," Juvia supplied with a fake smile—all lips and no teeth. It was more or less a sneer.
Cana bit the tip of her index finger and made a show of contemplating. "Bible?"
The water mage frowned, scanning her back. "Yeah."
"When did Biblie have pictures of models in bikinis?" The brunette blew a whistle.
"Shuddap! You don't know anything!" Natsu fanned his face.
"Okay, princess. Can I take a peek?" Cana turned to Natsu, waggling her eyebrows. "Let me see what's so interesting about it."
"Don't bring your unholy hands anywhere near my book!" His embarrassment was showing on his red face, but Natsu did what he was good at, bellowing on and on until Cana dropped the book and left the room, cursing him like the witch she was. Unfortunately, he was a warlock, and her curses didn't faze him. Juvia didn't leave.
Because it was her room.
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"It's a great evening today in Fiore. Welcome to another episode of Talking Tapes. If you're here for the first time—Hi there! I'm Forrest and.." On the screen, light bounced back from Forrest's teeth when he paused for a grin, adding to the vintage effect.
"This is Barbara. I know you're all curious! So, let's get on with it. What you're about to see today is Mix N' Match!"
A blond, tomboyish girl outshone Forrest's face on the screen. Lucy's eyes were star-struck at the face she saw every Sunday on Earthland Now. She was a die-hard fan of this woman. She wished to display this much confidence and take the audience in her hands like she does. She chewed on the popcorn nonstop, and so did Gray.
"So who do you think is gonna get spied today? You'll see after a short break!"
"No shit Sherlock." Fiore's television channels had become intensely greedy. "One second into the show, and they're showing ads already?" Gray bit his lips, sliding a hand near the remote to change the channel, but who said it was allowed! He swallowed weakly. Lucy held his hand in a death grip. "It's shot live. They're probably having some technical difficulties." The ice mage huffed at her pointless justification.
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Ryuzetsu Land was the best place to relax and have fun. Yet Natsu's disappointment showed on his face. If she came to unwind, why did Juvia have to take her damn laptop to the resort? Did she not know how to have fun? This was a date, for fuck's sake. He did not deserve this. "If you don't stop staring at the screen within the next two minutes, I'm gonna go find another woman to spend time with." Juvia twisted her mouth, her brows furrowing in concentration as she did some dumb thing in PowerPoint.
"One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Si—"
"OKAY!" She shut her laptop, hooking an arm around his, "Sorry. I didn't mean to be an asshole!" She should have kept her word if she had agreed to go on the date.
Natsu pursed his lips before his face regained its sunniness. "Alrighty. Let's go on the LoveLoveSlider together!" Cana watched from a distance as they trotted towards the slide with creepy smiles on their faces. She gagged, disgusted at their lovey-dovey behaviour. This was a recent development. She had abandoned them the moment they stepped foot in here. Who wants to be a third wheel? This place was packed. There were all sorts of stores, food courts and magic potion shops. She had a smirk to match the round, pink sunglasses perched at the bridge of her nose. She flipped her hair, taking off her shades before flexing her toned legs to sprawl onto the sunlounger, enjoying the sun. Her bikini was so flashy it turned more than a few heads her way, cucumber discs asleep over her eyelids.
That's when something unexpected happened. The cucumbers were boorishly taken way, her eyes popping open to find the culprit. Oh, Cana was screwed. The woman jolted from her seat. With one dash, she made a beeline towards the swimming pool. She skidded to the pool with a splash, bewildered eyes following her every move. Rogue was not happy with the turn of events. Dark shadows swirled out of him, ready to engulf everything. He was not going to let her get away with what she did. In the next few minutes, she would have to get out of the pool to take a breath, and he was an enormously patient man. So he squatted on the floor, waiting for her head to rise to the rippling line of the water. It happened within a minute. Rogue scorned, his expanding aura driving the people away from him on trembling feet. "Where's Frosh!" The interrogation began.
"I dumped him in the well."
"You psychopath!"
Cana raised her hands to defend herself. "He said he knew how to swim." She trembled in fear.
"Do you have a death wish! What kind of wood do you like? I'll make you a coffin. "
"Rosewood!" She rambled. "But not today!"
He loomed over her, his shadow growing larger over her shrinking form. "Why did you do what you did?"
"It was an accident! I took him outta there!" Her throat dipped when she gulped. "He was so spooked and became a li'l chaotic, so I had to lock him in my room!"
One look at Rogue's worsening demeanour reassured Cana that her sins would never be forgiven.
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Forrest and Barbara reached the resort very late, but the sight was 24k of pure swag. The resort had lit up like a Christmas tree after the afternoon dulled to gloom. People swooned at them and raked their eyes over the pair, stripping them with their eyes. Well, these people were famous models, so it is no surprise. But it felt like the resort had been smoked in love potion. A Valentine's Day Special harassment. Forrest chewed on his lips, wondering if they should report this to the authorities. But unfortunately, using problematic magic portions wasn't illegal in Fiore. Hence, their hands were tied. While Forrest observed his surroundings, his blonde companion strolled towards their bored colleague who had been waiting for them to get there.
The colleague, a tall, bull-necked guy with jealous eyes, did not like him. He had a ginormous crush on Barbara and thought they had something going on. Nothing could make him believe otherwise. His shoulder-length olive mane had been tied into a high ponytail. Forrest unbuttoned his shirt, exposing his tanned chest to more attention. He slipped his phone out of his shorts with a sigh. The man had several messages from his mother, who sent him photos of prospective marriage partners, urging him to get married. For the love of god, he was only thirty!
His female companion has been weird since morning. She kept looking around, even as they sat in the restaurant and ate her favourite food. He knew discomfort when he saw it. She rubbed her hands over her exposed arms and thighs, self-conscious. She had been a bit too cheerful and not like herself. "Are you okay?" He asked her a few minutes into their meal. The next thing he knows, the woman is flying out of her seat like she had a great revelation.
"W-what?" His eyebrows touched his hairline when he saw Barbara gathering her things in a heartbeat.
"I'm sorry. I'll be back soon!" Did she have something else to take care of?
The woman didn't seem aware of the attention she was getting. Forrest sighed. She was confident but not as clever as she thought she was.
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There it was! All her secrets! Barbara did not come here to only laze about and eat good food. Her blackmailer had kept her baby hostage. If her hunch was true, they must not have unlocked it yet. She needed to get her baby back before her messages with the CEO got leaked. The blonde took a shortcut to one of the tables near the pool. She could recognise it anywhere. It was hers, after all. Her pace got heavier in seconds, and once she got it, she held it like a trophy. "Phew. I had a minor heart attack thinking that something happened to my baby." She holds it close to her chest.
"Oh my god!" Juvia's gasp was loud. She could not believe someone would steal her laptop while she was playing in the water! She stomped her feet forward, ready to threaten the wretched mugger trying to sneak her precious Jarvis inside her suitcase. She reached for her laptop, screaming. "It's MY baby."
"No." The blonde reporter shrugged, passive-aggressive. This must be the fraud who had blackmailed her. "It's my baby, and I've decided to sue you." Juvia couldn't believe what she was hearing. How dare she! And then began a tug of war. The fuming women battled for victory. They rolled on the grass, pulling at each other's hair, fighting tooth and nail for the baby. Barbara was no longer a reporter but a concerned mother. Fuck professionalism or the fact that they were live.
"Who's the father of this baby?" It was an outside intervention, aka Natsu prattling irrelevant yet suspicious things.
"Me!" They exclaimed together. The dragon slayer gets between the altercation only to make things more complicated. Since when has he ever solved anything. As shit went down, the cameraman enjoyed the drama a little too much. It's now every day you see a reporter fighting with a teenager. They had not even started their job in Ryuzetsu Land. It was already a colossal mess.
Everything ceased in steam, Natsu's involvement in the fight remaining a mystery. Well. It became a mystery when he bellowed into the camera, "Yes, Juvia is my girlfriend, but I'm fighting for myself! Heard that? You heard that, you dumb-looking idiot?" He told the cameraman, who had the worst idea of voicing his doubts. The guy didn't ask the former if idiots were supposed to look like Nikola Tesla because arguing with a fool means you're a fool yourself. At least they did not destroy anything, only humiliated themselves on live TV.
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The live show had nothing but dissolved into chaos. Gray watches as the steam erupts from the waterpark, unspeakable horror choking him. He knew that magic. He knew that face. He could only utter a frantic, "No fucking way." His roommate's girlfriend is his ex-stalker, ex-fangirl and ex-staunch-friend who had once vanished off the face of the earth after Gray's appalling rejection.
He doesn't know how to respond, how to react. Fret not! Lucy does it for him.
"Gray exe has stopped working."
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