Chapter 6: The Brink of Madness

Subaru's cries began to go silent as Emilia walked back to her house, her unknown guest dazedly following. Emilia might have assumed that Subaru had passed out from the stress and trauma of the last few minutes, if it weren't for the fact that he was coughing up blood on her as he gasped for air. The slight bit of blue on his lips worried her all the more.

She couldn't panic though, panicking would keep her from helping Subaru. If she could just buy time, Puck would be back; maybe she couldn't fix all of this, but surely Puck could. Pulling on the water mana from the air, she tried to heal Subaru in whatever manner she could. The sense of his body that the healing techniques brought back was extremely disheartening. Subaru's entire body seemed like one giant wound. She couldn't make the slightest headway into healing all of it. She couldn't even figure out where to start.

Were Emilia from Subaru's world she would have the anatomical knowledge to understand that it was likely that Subaru's lung had taken damage and that she should focus around the chest. But for someone who had no idea of how the internal organs were arranged and what they did, the wounds on his back seemed just as bad as, if not worse than, the blows he'd taken to his chest.

"Puck. Please hurry back. I don't know what to do." Emilia begged in desperation.

"Subaru, please stay with me!" Emilia half-sobbed, half yelled.

She did not receive an answer. Her initial assumption that Subaru had passed out was not incorrect, it was just an incomplete assessment of the situation. Had Emilia and Subaru been in the right state of mind they might have noticed the slight froths of blood brought up by Subaru's crying that he had unwittingly swallowed.

Unable to think of anything else, she focused her hardest on trying to heal everything. Perhaps if she tried hard enough Subaru would stay alive just a bit longer, just long enough…

"Please. Why won't they close? Heal! Why can't I do anything!" Desperation gave way to anger at her lack of ability. Her eyes teared to the point she couldn't even see Subaru as he faded away in her arms.

As heart-wrended cries ravaged Emilia's body a pair of cat ears flickered, and distant green-eyes grew lucid. The girl who had been frozen in shock and fear all day felt as if she'd just woken from a horrible day-dream. Looking at Emilia's blood-soaked body a frisson of fear ran down her spine as her tail stood on end. The pointy ears, the silver hair, the purple eyes, and the carnage she'd seen telt brought images of the witch forth.

The only thing halting her instinct to flee, was how desperately she cried over the boy that freed her from the cage. That and the damnable blessing that had dealt her her hand in life, The Divine Protection of Soul Reading. Blessed with the ability to know the inner-nature of whoever she met, the world itself was telling her that the pair of children before her were overwhelmingly kind and selfless. She could know the nature of a person, but not their intentions, thoughts, or their emotions. It had been mostly kind people who had sold her into slavery just a couple days ago, that that kindness had not been extended to her was beyond her ability to perceive. Even so, the whispers of the world had warned her about the people of the village, she hadn't listened. This time that very same soundless voice was assuring her, and hearing the young girls wails she didn't have the heart to turn away.

Gently putting a hand on the silver-haired girl's shoulder, "I used to be a healer in the village, let me try and help." She did her best to keep her voice calm, being perceived as a threat could very well see her blood scattered about the forest just like her captors' had been.

Frenzied, desperate amethyst eyes met hers, the tears pouring forth giving them the appearance of glistening gemstones. Seemingly convinced by the sincerity in her eyes the elven girl acquiesced.

"Please. Help Subaru."

Without a moment's pause she set to work. The sheer amount of damage dealt to the young boy's, or rather Subaru's, body was staggering. Weakened as she was from her captivity she couldn't deal with all of it. And given the delicacy of the situation letting the unexperienced girl try and finish the job would be a dangerous proposition.

"I can't fix all of it right now. When they took me they drugged me to reduce my ability to use magic. But I should be able take care of the worst of it." There was an odd sense of comfort falling back on the professional instincts of her trade. Her voice reflected the odd sense of calm that had come of her, that had needed to come over her.

"Please do Miss…" Emilia's voice was twisted with desperate hope to the point she would have looked in place begging from the depths of a full body bow.

"It's Clarissa. Just Clarissa." Her answer given, she went back to work.

It was the first time she had ever tried to heal something while walking as the person was carried. However, given that Subaru's lungs had taken damage she did her best to walk alongside the two and get Subaru out of the cold air. Clarissa could hardly believe the amount of damage that had been delivered to Subaru's body in the scant few minutes that he had been assaulted, just as concerning were the remnants of a knife wound on his leg. Still the biggest priority was Subaru's lung, which although unpunctured had been bruised and was now filling with blood. Oddly enough despite the damage, Subaru's heartbeat was steady and the pallor in his face was fading ever so slightly. It was at that point when she noticed it: the staggering amount of healing magic which was being aimlessly coursed through Subaru's body. Turning towards the silver-haired girl, she saw sweat dripping down her face. The strain of channeling this much mana, through the spiritual arts or not, had to be immense or rather nigh unbearable. Despite some labored breathing and some sweating, there was little else to tell the tale of this desperate struggle.

"How is she…" Clarissa couldn't help but whisper in dumbfounded awe.

Indeed, the amount of mana that Emilia was mustering would be more than sufficient to obliterate several regiments of an army per second. She had compensated for her lack of power and knowledge with bruteforce and willpower. The feat she was achieving was not incomparable to an olympic sprinter attempting to maintain his one hundred meter dash speed for an entire marathon. Even for someone of Emilia's endurance, such a task was of a level of exertion such that attempting it might very well be fatal.

Shaking the unnecessary thoughts from her head she focused. As long as this situation lasted Subaru wouldn't die, she had one task: to heal as much of the lung damage as she could. With great effort she managed to reduce the swelling of the lung tissue and bring the bleeding to an end. Having burned through the majority of her remaining mana, Clarissa's head spun as a dizzy spell threatened to overtake her. She didn't have time for that, however, there was one more task remaining.

"This is going to be unpleasant for Subaru, but I need to remove some blood from inside of him. Please don't panic." Her warning made Clarissa steeled herself.

Unpleasant was perhaps an understatement, thankfully Subaru was asleep. There was only one place for blood in an airway to escape, through the mouth. The only treatment option available to her was to induce magically assisted coughs and forcibly expel the blood. It was quite unfortunate that Emilia drew Subaru in closer in preparation for something quite painful to happen to him. This had the unfortunate consequence that all the ejected blood was launched directly at Emilia's face.

Had the situation been less dire, the started and panicked look in Emilia's eyes might have been funny. Only the steadying of Subaru's breathing into calm unlabored breaths spared Emilia a full-blown panic attack.

"Was...that...supposed to happen?" Somewhere between stunned, frightened, and exhausted Emilia's question was posed with halting pauses.

"Yes. I just didn't expect you to pull him right up to your face Miss…" Clarissa trailed off, realizing she didn't know the girl's name.

"Emilia. Is Subaru going to be okay?" In a show of unintentional rudeness Emilia immediately pressed in with questions.

"He's not in danger anymore. He's not better, but he's fine for now. Still just to be safe I need you to stop using your healing magic Miss Emilia." Clarissa's voice remained calm, completely unbothered by Emilia's concern-driven impropriety.

A deep sigh of relief later, "Just Emilia, please." After a deep breath in she continued, "Being called Miss feels reaaally weird."

Meeting Emilia's sincerely thankful eyes, the very terror that her figure had struck in Clarissa just moments before seemed silly. Or rather, it would have seemed silly if she weren't stained red in the blood of her friend and enemies.

Mere moments after their exchange Emilia's eyes went back to staring at Subaru with sorrowful worry. Wanting to grant Emilia a brief reprieve from her fretting Clarissa attempted to engage her in small talk.

"What were you trying to do today?" Clarissa immediately wanted to kick herself, in trying to be a distraction she directly brought up the issue she was trying to avoid.

"Subaru wanted to go make a snowman. He said it wouldn't be that hard to do even with his leg healing up." A wan smile crossed Emilia's lips.

Clarissa barely held back the urge to burst out laughing. The girl who had seemed a murderous goddess had just wanted to help her friend make a snowman!? Even more absurd, she had been freed because two kids wanted to build a snowman. How typical that the vagaries of fate couldn't have sent them her way just a day sooner, if that happened then just maybe…

"Subaru called them slavers, what does that mean?" Emilia's eyes never left the rise and fall of Subaru's chest as she asked her question.

Unbeknownst to Emilia, her nervous tremors were clearly visible to Clarissa. How ironic it was that "Just Emilia" and "Just Clarissa" were horrible at small talk and just barely holding themselves together. The question painted Clarissa in an undesirable corner: did she try and protect Emilia's innocence and soften the truth, or did she let her know how horrible the men she had murdered in life had been? If she softened the truth, then she would be covering up just how many lives Emilia had protected in her decisive action. If she told the whole truth she would be telling, an apparently extremely sheltered girl, the truths of the world: of slavery, prostitution, and rape.

"Have you really never seen or been told what a slave is?" Such a reality beggared disbelief to Clarissa given how cruel the world they lived in could be.

A shake of the head was her only answer as Emilia gently stroked Subaru's hair, only half invested, perhaps less, in the conversation she was carrying on. The steely focus Emilia cast upon Subaru deeply disturbing to her feline observer. Getting a closer look, Emilia's eyes were dull and her posture was rigid. She continued to cradle Subaru to her body-defensively. Although Emilia was answering her questions, Clarissa could have sworn they were miles apart.

"Hey, are you okay? How you had to deal with those guys was pretty brutal." She made sure to keep her tone as gentle as possible.

"What are you talking about? I just froze them temporarily, they should be thawing out soon." Emilia's intonation rose in genuine confusion.

Struck silent Clarissa could only listen, "Still how did Subaru get so bloody?"

"This can't all be his blood, he's here in my arms and not hurt that badly. Although I am a bit worried that he's soooo out of it." Emilia's tone was hauntingly calm, almost cheary.

"Honestly, if he doesn't wake up soon he'll miss dinner," her voice colored in inappropriate fond exasperation she gave a gentle teasing pinch to Subaru's cheek.

Emilia had gone into her own world again, seemingly having forgotten everything around her. The hairs on the end of Clarissa's tail stood on end as she took in the unsettling sight. Resisting her urge to flee, she kept a shy watch from a distance over the two. Outside of her merciless execution of the thugs that had tortured Subaru, Emilia had not shown any inclination to use her overwhelming might for violence. The protective stance the clearly unhinged girl had wrapped Subaru within impressed upon her that maintaining her distance might be a very prudent choice.

The last few minutes of the walk passed quickly, the only sound other than the crunch of their footsteps being Emilia cheerfully humming some off-pitch tune. Before long a small wooden hut became visible. And although Emilia didn't invite her in she also didn't close the door behind her.

"Subaru's still asleep, I'll have to scold Puck for pushing him too hard earlier," Emilia went to place Subaru in bed.

Clarissa, however, had to chance an intervention, "Until he finishes healing it will be easier on Subaru if we can have him sleep sitting up."

Completely accepting but nonplussed about the advice Emilia carried Subaru over to a wall and sat down against it leaving Subaru to rest on her chest. In a show of cat-like content, Emilia nuzzled her face against Subaru's soldier before cuddling against him like a giant teddy bear. Were the two not covered in blood and viscera, it would have made quite the adorable scene. But as it was, it was more akin to watching someone cuddle a murder victim. The only fact that broke the illusion was the steady rise and fall of Subaru's chest.

A delicate yawn echoed off the walls, "I don't know why I'm so tired, I didn't really do anything today."

In the world that Emilia had vacated to, that was a true statement. In her world she hadn't gone to drastic lengths to heal Subaru, since he'd barely been hurt. In her world she hadn't delivered a brutal execution to Subaru's assailants, she'd merely put them in an icy time-out for picking on Subaru. She'd then come home, with someone she couldn't quite remember. And that was strange, Emilia was sure she should know who the other girl was. Emilia's world was a kind and gentle place...if only she could actually live in it.

Emilia's eyes were heavy and her thoughts dazed, it honestly felt like she'd been dreaming this whole time. Honestly she was so tired she could barely keep her eyes open. Surely it wouldn't hurt to take a nap, it wasn't fair if only Subaru got to take a nap.

In short order Emilia dozed off, her head on Subaru's shoulder. As the sound of Emilia's soft snores drifted about the room, at long last Clarissa's legs gave out and she collapsed to the floor. She didn't know whether to cry, scream, laugh, or do anything at all. Completely lost, she just stared at the wall.

She had no home to return to. She had no family to turn to, she hadn't had any for a long time. The village that had taken her in after her parents had abandoned her had sold her just a couple days ago. They'd sold her to have the witch who dwelled in the forest, the girl sleeping across the room from her, removed. Dead, enslaved, it didn't matter as long as they never saw her again. As a poor village they'd had no money to pay with, and so they'd offered her up, the half-breed they'd so kindly tolerated.

As someone attuned with water-magic she'd had a use as a healer. In exchange they'd let her sleep in the stables, graciously given her what scraps they had to eat, the local doctor had even helped her learn how to heal. For someone of her situation, it was a much better lot than most would draw.

It hadn't been a happy life, but it hadn't been a horrible life. As a young girl she'd held hope that some man might marry her, give her a home, give her a family. Obviously that never happened, never would happen. Not human, not a full-blooded demi-human she'd been too repulsive to draw anyone's eye.

Her divine protection hadn't lied to her, the village had been indeed mostly kind. To harbor someone you dislike rather than leaving them to die was indeed a kindness. They'd even left selling her into slavery as a matter taken only in fear of the village's well being. A decision made in fear of the ice flowers the girl across from her had made bloom. They hadn't just bloomed before the family that had fled back in terror, they'd bloomed all the way up to the very boundaries of the village.

In a sense, the girl across from her was responsible for her enslavement. Despite her detestable resemblance to the witch she had a home, a close friend, and the strength to protect herself. Emilia had almost everything that Clarissa had desired her whole life. This girl who had been so lucky to not even be aware of the existence of slaves, had unwittingly cost her everything.

Even so, neither Subaru nor Emilia had hesitated to save her. All of the misfortune they had endured today had been because they had chosen to free her. This left her in the confusing position of being grateful to the one who had cost her everything.

When she'd seen Subaru on death's door, she couldn't have not helped. Watching people suffer, had been the one thing she could never do. So she'd helped the utterly terrifying girl save her friend. Honestly, watching the spitting image of the Witch of Envy care so deeply about a helpless boy had been nothing less than dizzying. Even in the grips of whatever madness had overtaken her today, she'd been so sweetly affectionate to Subaru that she could feel the cavities setting in just by watching.

Shaking her puzzled musings loose she set forth to find a washcloth. Given the small size of the dwelling and the surprising tidiness for a place only inhabited by two children, it took a couple minutes at most of dazed searching to find one. Dampening it with a minute use of water magic, she went to clean the blood and viscera from the two when an unnatural cold gripped the room.

Frozen by the pressing of an incorporeal weight, she found herself eye to eye with a grey cat radiating a blizzard of murderous intent. Only in fleeting worried glances to the two children, was there any pause in the spirit's unyielding ferocity.

"I'd like to know why my daughter and her friend are covered in blood," Puck's voice was uncharacteristically cold as he gave his demand.

Try as she might, not a single word left Clarissa's mouth. Although wide open, the only sound that left it was a near inaudible squeak. Her legs quivered feebly, threatening to dump in her to the floor as an insensate wreck.

She had thought Emilia had been terrifying earlier, she was now forced to revise that assessment. If Emilia was the reaper, then the being before her was a vengeful god here to cast judgment on her soul.

"If you won't speak, then I'll just have to pluck it from your mind," Puck had no patience for her terror.

A second later, Puck was ripping through her mind. After satiating his curiosity, Puck's face took on the moroseness of a worried parent.

"Sorry for the scare. Thank you for looking out for them," Puck's voice was much more relaxed, but the shallowness of his remorse was evident. Even so, his appreciation was genuine.

Despite Clarissa's uneasy feelings towards Emilia there had never been any intent to harm, nor any ill-will. That put her in the short list of people who were not hostile to Emilia's existence.

Rather than answer she simply caught her breath and tried to slow her racing heartbeat. Not that her deep breaths brought her much calm.

"Mah, well anyways we need to start cleaning the two of them off. After that you can tell me how best to treat Subaru." Puck's forced cheeriness was deeply offsetting to Clarissa.

"Wait, so you know...what happened back there...aren't you worried about them?" Her voice was tentative, afraid to anger the spirit more than the sight of the two covered in blood already had.

"Honestly, I'm more relieved than worried oddly enough. Lia's always been an overly kind girl, so I'm glad to see that she can harden herself to take decisive action. As sad as I am to see it, she's growing up."

An incandescent rage boiled over in Clarissa. To be relieved that the person you call daughter had so violently executed a group of assailants, such sentiments did not match up with her understanding of what love should be. For the first time today her fear and sorrow had been brushed aside.

"They're just kids! They shouldn't have to make these kinds of decisions! If you claim to be that girl's father, then why weren't you there!?" Her small fangs were bared as her tail went rigid.

"Don't you try and lecture me. No one would like to hide Emilia away from the terrors of the world more than I do. That path, however, has been closed to me. The world is not a kind place for a demi-human much less a half elf and you know that as well as anyone. Unlike you, she can't try and squeeze by on a meager existence at the mercy of others, not as a silver-haired half elf. You know, first hand, the fate that awaited her if she gave in to their demands." Puck's voice was cold and bitter, and in his anger he poked a fresh wound.

Clarissa rocked back as if struck, "But she's just a kid, surely they wouldn't have…"

"Scum that can hold a kid hostage is just as likely to seek it's pleasure in a kid as they were you," Puck was merciless as he laid out the fate Emilia had dodged.

"Besides, they're strong kids. Give them a few days and they'll bounce back. Better she stains her hands a bit, than a lifetime of horrors." As cruel as Puck's words sounded they were filled with pride and faith.

Puck was in no way exaggerating the danger posed to Emilia, uncountable people would want her dead or worse. His deepest fear had been that Emilia and Subaru would be too kind-hearted to protect themselves properly. He couldn't be around all the time, he couldn't be around as much as he even wanted. Echidna's damnable contract would not allow it. But in this current state where Subaru would refuse to let Emilia be hurt and Emilia would refuse to allow Subaru to be hurt, his two selfless idiots would be able to use the other to excuse necessary violence. No one understood better than Puck just how much what she had done would hurt Emilia, but his doubts about Emilia's ability to handle her past had been misplaced and he had no doubt that she could overcome this obstacle too.

Clarissa's eyes were averted, Puck had just treaded headlessly over a shame she had hoped to take with her to her grave. Puck felt the slightest bit of regret, she had gotten indignant on Emilia's behalf after all.

Taking a deep breath Puck apologized, "Sorry, I shouldn't have taken it that far. Still, I would end the world before I let Emilia go through such a fate, and I won't regret being thankful for any circumstances that avoid her being defiled like that."

Clarissa may not have realized it, but Puck did indeed mean that he would end the world should it spare Emilia that kind of pain. Nevertheless his protective motivation was conveyed.

"You've been through a lot, so I'm okay with letting you take Lia up on her offer on a few conditions: you help treat Subaru's wounds and after you've had some time to pull yourself together you have a woman to woman talk with Lia about the things I, as a boy, can't teach her, and I need you to pull babysitter duty when I can't be around."

The last one took her by surprise, "babysitting?"

"Those two have a tendency to get caught up in troublesome heroics when I'm away. Seriously, I leave for two hours and come back to this." Puck gestured a paw towards the macabre scene Emilia and Subaru made.

"I don't know if I could really stop her…" Clarissa trailed off, doubting her ability to stop someone as powerful as Emilia from doing anything.

"Look, I know you're spooked about how strong she is, but she's a good girl. They're both good kids, they just need someone to make them think things through. I don't have a lot of options, so I'm making due with what I have." Puck shamelessly admitted to using Clarissa's circumstances to his benefit.

It was a doubtlessly true statement that Puck didn't have many options. The amount of near adult people who bore Emilia no ill-will and had a reason to stick around was currently one. It was also true that leaving the kids alone had been a recipe for disaster lately. So Puck took the only option available to him.

Clarissa acquiesced to Puck's demands with a nod as she took the damp washcloth in hand and finally began to clean the blood off of Subaru's body. In short order Subaru's face and neck were clean. The hair would have to wait until Subaru could move around, and the rest would require removing Subaru from Emilia's grasp.

Gently she tried to pry Emilia's arms loose from Subaru, but her response was to tighten her grip and hug Subaru towards her.

"A bit longer Subaru," Emilia adorably grumped mid-slumber.

A second attempt did, however, yield results as her grip loosened. It was as Subari was rolled over to get a look at his back that Emilia's eyes fluttered open. Shortly after they took a laser focus on Subaru's shredded back.

"Subaru! When did that…" Emilia launched into a confused panic.

She went to hurry to his side when a wave of dizziness and nausea doubled her over. As the memory of Subaru's brutal beating flashed across her mind she vomited on the floor in a sequence of impressive heaves.

"I...those men... Subaru, my fault…" Emilia muttered insensately as dry heaves shook her tiny body.

Puck flew over to Emilia in a panic, "Easy now, calm down and take a deep breath."

Puck gently his paw down her back, as he whispered whatever comfort he could provide. Although Emilia's gastric upheaval had ceased, she was still muttering to herself as she cradled her head swinging it side to side, eyes clenched shut.

"I didn't have to kill all of them."

"I should have acted quicker."

"Subaru shouldn't have had to die."

A litany of such regrets left her mouth, but it was the last one that brought time to a halt, as shadows enveloped the suddenly still room.

In the functioning parts of Emilia's mind was the distant acknowledgement that these shadows felt entirely different then the ones that had wrapped around Satella's form. What had filled the room was an unmistakable sense of malice.

From the undulating shadows that draped every corner of Emilia's vision dozens of hands sprouted forth. One of which went on a straight line to her chest. In short order a shadowy hand wrapped around her heart.

The hand squeezed, ever so slightly. As soon as it had clenched it let go. The hand mockingly clenched and released a few more times.

Even as Emilia trembled in terror, a part of her instinctively felt that this was intended as a threat, rather than an execution. As she cowered, she couldn't shake the odd familiarity of this dizzying power that stopped time. A sensation she had just felt not once, but twice before today-the sensation she had felt as Subaru died.

Something, or perhaps someone within her, let her know that she could not speak of whatever power brought them back from Subaru's death, and that should she break that rule she would find her heart crushed.

The shadows surrounding her receded, and color bled back into the world. As the world came back to life, Emilia breathlessly bent over clutching her chest. The pain was gone, but the heart-wrenching fear remained.

Surprisingly, the icy fear shooting down her spine, brought clarity. Ignoring Puck's gentle fussing she righted herself and walked towards Subaru.

"Lia?" Puck called out in worry.

As she approached Clarissa who had cut Subaru's clothing off his torso, and had been preparing to clean his wounds before her meltdown, she called out with a gentle firmness, "I'll do it."

The firmness in Emilia's eyes and the command in her request, had Clarissa thoughtlessly offer the towel to Emilia. Snapping back to her senses, Clarissa went to instruct Emilia, but such concern turned out to be unnecessary. Emilia cleaned Subaru's many wounds with extreme care and tenderness.

Watching Emilia as she carefully tended to her friend, tears pouring out of her eyes, Clarissa could scarcely believe that she had been terrified of Emilia. What terrified her more was the thought of telling Puck what needed to happen next: Subaru needed to be seen by an experienced doctor, and the only one nearby was in the village that had sold her off to have Emilia eliminated.

Afterword

Before I leave any comments and thoughts I'd like to think everyone for their kind reviews and messages, the response rate for this story has been unbelievable. Seriously the review to view ratio is incredible, thanks so much for your support and I hope I can live up to your expectations.

I debated a lot on whether to introduce an original character or not. I wanted some interactions to bridge Emilia's sheltered life in the forest with the reality many demi-humans are experiencing. I also thought a somewhat outside perspective on Emilia might be interesting. Clarissa is intended to be a continuing supporting character, but rest assured that Emilia and Subaru are and will remain the primary focus.

We enter a rather depressing aftermath/bridging part of the story. Subaru and Emilia will be coming to grips with some rather unsavory parts of the world, and in many ways this will shape where they go as characters. I think you can imagine how bleeding hearts like Subaru and Emilia will see the realities of prejudice, slavery, and etc. From here we finally to get to shake some of the cannon rails. I have an exciting and unexpected twist planned 2 to 3 chapters out, please look forward to the next major conflict.

Fun aside, I spent a fair bit of time reading up on the psychology of trauma for this time. Disassociative amnesia and such are very real things, although substantial artistic liberties were taken.