Chapter 22

Prior to helping Izuku practice his diagonal cuts, I was sitting in an empty rec room for almost two hours before anyone else showed up. It wasn't unusual for me to be early since on a normal day I left straight from work, but I could not spend another moment with my mother, not when she was going to stand there and remind me of everything that I hated about myself. So I was here a little bit earlier than I was used to, my lightsabers and exercise bag heavy on my back as I sat in my usual spot against the wall and supply closet doors. I needed to vent, and putting my body through grueling training with plastic swords sounded downright therapeutic to me. I tried using my techniques for coping and tried to calm myself down, deep breathing meditation and by distracting myself with favorite TV shows like watching Friends reruns on my phone while I worked on comic pages, though I had to stop once people started showing up since I had accidentally left my headphones at home. There were at least three paper cranes in front of me, leftover from the last of my MRI candy and absolute silence for a good long while before the usual stream of people trickled in, setting up in their respective corners of the room as they pulled on their gear.

So you could imagine my surprise when I saw Izuku standing there, cutely poking his head in the doorway like he was somehow being rude by intruding on our class. Once I was over my shock, my mood did a complete one-eighty for most of the class. By him just being there, his very presence acted like a soothing melody that made me down right giddy. How the hell had he done that? My downward spirals usually wiped me out for the rest of the day, but one surprise guest appearance from him and my day was made. What was wrong with me?

Calm down, Alyssa. You're just excited that your friend is here. No need to scare him off or over-analyze why you can't react like a normal human being. He's just being nice, I kept reminding myself while I practiced, alternating roles from being the attacker or defender. Once he got the hang of things, he was a quick study. A few more weeks coming to lessons and he probably wouldn't need me anymore.

"Okay everyone, circle up. It's time to play King of the Hill." Everyone dropped what they were doing, including the Form VIs that were gathered outside. We stood in the center of the room, creating a large circle as our headmaster, Mikaeru Miki, explained the rules. "As a refresher, the point is to stay in the circle for as long as possible without dying. Losers do five down and backs. If I catch anyone doing head-shots, it's ten down and backs. I don't want a repeat of last time. We don't need anymore Chisukes," he warned, referencing a former student who was known for hitting people in the head with a lightsaber so hard that it actually drew blood; it had become a bit of an in-joke label towards people who kept hitting people in the head, an illegal sword move. I didn't need to be looking directly at him to know that his eyes were on me as he was stating this, instead keeping my eyes towards the other students.

One of the Form IIs, a guy I knew by the name of Yakobu Chihaya, stood in the center of the ring as the first obstacle. We didn't talk much, but I knew that he had French and Italian fencing training and was capable enough in it to be considered as a replacement instructor for Form II. He would make for a challenging first opponent. Nervous but eager for some action, I took the plunge and stood in front of Yakobu, who wore his usual impassive expression that I always had trouble reading. Form IIs were the mortal enemies of Form Is, our equal opposite as they were light on their feet and a very aggressive form that could create fast, one-handed, streamlined attacks that were very hard to block unless you knew how to maneuver the blade efficiently. His curved, obsidian handle lightsaber hung from his white gloved hand like a true Italian fencer as he tucked his other arm behind the small of his back in his own version of engarde. If this had been been a spar, we would have bowed to each other. However, since this was a free-for-all, all we did was ignite our sabers and wait for either to make the first move.

"You're not going to attack?" Yakobu asked after I had circled him, trying to think the best way to approach him from the side. "Fine, then I will." On the word will, he lunged forward with a quick barrage of attacks. I pivot stepped to the side to stop him mid-block and tried to set up a parry in an attempt to step into the blade and force it against his leg, thereby locking his wrist. However, he moved back too quickly for me to keep up, hopping onto his back foot. I had been too cautious and easygoing. The instant I tried to go on the defensive, it was all over. Like the Fist of the North Star meme stated, I was already dead.

"HAAAA- (Ah shit)," I yelped as the tip of the sword piked through my chest, causing me to stagger back before I relaxed my arms. Rather than take it to heart and let the full disappointment hit me from the shortest match ever, I was instead full of inexplicable giddy laughter at the stupidity of the anti-climatic moment. I clutched my chest where I had been struck in an effort to play off my disappointment for laughs, still in a somewhat good mood as I exclaimed dramatically, "Argh I'm dying! Ugh I'm DEAD! I will have my revenge!" shaking my fist at the sky for good measure. My grin widened from Izuku's amused expression in the corner of my eye and the fact that I had made the stoic Yakobu Chihaya crack a smile and even let out an uncharacteristic laugh, which was a victory in and of itself, well worth the price of a brisk jog. I stood at the edge of the room and began doing quick sprints back and forth from one end of the room to the other.

By the time I had finished, Yakobu had been replaced by a more experienced Form V student that I knew to be Kat's roommate, who was confusingly named Katsuro. I just referred to him as Boulder Hair inside my head as I stood next to Izuku, watching the match take place against another Form V named Kilala, both of them locked in aggressive combat.

"Don't worry. No one is going to make you spar on your first day," I said to Izuku in reassurance, figuring he was nervous to take on such Goliath opponents.

"Oh good. I don't think I'm prepared enough to take on something like that," he said with an uneasy laugh.

"Yeah. These can get a little intense depending on who you are fighting." Right as I had said that, Katsuro had broken out of the hold and forcefully struck Kilala on the leg, the fiber glass sabers making an audible crack as the tip of one of her crossguards flew off. She sighed and grudgingly picked up the piece of plastic for what had to be the fifth time and shoved it back onto the top of her sword. The girl really needed to get a new replacement blade.

"Alright, who's next? Who's brave enough to go into the thunderdome with this guy?" he bragged with his usual swagger, waving around his green lightsaber.

"Might as well get this over with," I said once no one stepped forward to take him on, feeling mild disappointment at his crossguard not being a Kylo Ren red before getting into a deep engarde. Boulder Hair raised his lightsaber in an overhead stance and twirled it in his hands so that the little crossguards were facing the angle of my blade. Okay, this time for sure. I'll look cool doing it too, I thought as I spun my own sword experimentally in my wrist and took a few subtle baby steps towards him, waiting for the key moment to close in. You had to be up-close and aggressive with Form Vs, otherwise they'd kill you, being masters of locking blades and then maneuvering them so that they could slide right past and pike you right through the heart, the form's main target. Being a hair too slow, Boulder Hair's crossguard caught my diagonal open with ease, locking my sword into a cancel and preventing me from continuing into a horizontal cut. Realizing how dangerous my situation was, I retreated two pivot steps back in an effort to give myself more time to strategize, but he saw through my deception and moved forward with me.

"Come on, Bloody Queen. Where is all of that fire? Too afraid of pulling a Chisuke?" Boulder Hair taunted with a smirk in an effort to out strength me as he forced my sword down at an angle, locking both of us into combat like two stags that had butt heads. Using my height and relying on my high body mass, I was not intimidated, but I was still pushed up against a wall of muscle and someone that was more experienced than me. I could hear some startled voices behind me as I refused to be bulldozed by someone shorter than me. Was Izuku directly behind me?

No! Not... yet... Not like this! My teeth ground into the indents of my mouth guard as I fought to keep from being pushed back into the edge of the circle, bending my knees so I would have a lower center of gravity and readjusting my position so that when the swords did unlock, Izuku and the others wouldn't get taken out by a stray sword strike, I wouldn't accidentally hit someone with a head-shot. Calm down. Don't do anything stupid! You need to think of something! Anything! Just get out of the damned hold! I stepped back and began pushing my way forward, having a better grip on my hilt as I tried to keep his sword from stabbing me.

"Out!" Tsubaki announced as acting referee, startling me with her sudden volume and presence that caused both of us to break out of the deadlock. The freckled Form VI was a wallflower right up until she wanted to be noticed. "Blake-san, you're out of bounds."

"Aww man. Damn it," I whined, grumbling at the default win but accepting defeat. I bit down on my mouth guard and gave Katsuro a well-mannered fist bump with my glove, a silent gesture of good sportsmanship between opponents, and walked back to where my water bottle was and a took a long swig from it. Sweat was pouring down the sides of my face as I wiped my forehead with the back of my glove and slicked my stray strands of hair back.

"You'll get him next time," Izuku said in an effort to try and cheer me up. His encouragement helped some, but all it really did was remind me of the shame I felt. I had been way too timid and was caught up in my head again, acting like such a novice by trying to think about way too many things at once that should have been instinctive by this point. It was one thing to be terrible if you were new, but I had been learning this skill for years and I still made the same mistakes. You never learn. Do better, the voice inside my head admonished me as I went to the other side of the room to do my laps with some mild frustration. My lungs were starting to burn now, my legs feeling the ache of long winded sprints, but I forcibly buried the signs of exhaustion by holding in my gasps and tried powering through in an effort to not look out of shape compared to most of my class of tiny, thin gym junkies.

There is no emotion, there is peace. There is no ignorance, there is knowledge. There is no passion, there is serenity. There is no chaos, there is harmony. There is no death, there is only the Force... I repeated the mantra written on my shirt and kept reciting the Jedi code from memory over and over as a distraction technique while I took my place next to Izuku and watched as Katsuro continued to decimate anyone who dared to step into the ring with him. Any longer and the headmaster would have to intervene, but if he went into play, the whole rest of class would be a moot point. No one could lay a scratch on the headmaster, not even the Form VI adherent level students that went onto actual sword fighting competitions. Itching for another rematch and a way to restore my honor, I stepped back into the ring to face down against Katsuro once more. Kilala cheered me on along with another girl, a Form VI named Keri Itsuki, who had just finished her match against Katsuro in defeat. "Avenge me, Ari-chan," she emoted towards me, clenching her fist against her chest.

"Your death shall not be in vain," I clasped her gloved hand in mine before going back into the center of the ring, off to face the boss a second time.

"'I've been waiting for you, Ari-Wan. We meet again at last,'" Katsuro said, partially quoting the dark lord as I twirled the red lightsaber in my hand.

"'The circle is now complete. When I left you, I was but the learner. Now I am the master,'" I declared back, raising my sword. This time, I would take him down and it wouldn't be over something stupid like getting disqualified over boundary lines. I threw myself into my attacks, hitting him with up-diagonals as a change of pace since the default move for a Form I was to go through the usual bread-and-butter pattern of hitting with diagonal cuts and transitioning to lower attacks. Go faster! Gotta move faster than your opponent, I urged myself as I began doing combinations even I couldn't predict to keep him on his toes, even if it broke my flow or technique. Still, even with all of my aggression, I still found myself locked in a cancel, trying to keep him from changing position so that he could keep from striking at my heart, a Form V's target zone.

Before I had panicked when I found myself in a gridlock with Katsuro. Now I was ready for him. I took a breath and began formulating a plan, remembering the words of my old master. 'When you find yourself cornered by a Form V, use the tip of your sword and maneuver around him. Remember to take a big cowboy step when you do it,' I told myself, hearing Ian's words playback to me like a dusty old record as I navigated Katsuro's saber away from me. Once he was open, I rammed my saber into his side, twisting my body into a horizontal strike.

"Out, Ishikami!"

"Wait- really?!" I thought aloud as the haze began to clear, numb to everything else but the flood of relief rushed through me as I let out a shaky laugh. The tight knot began to loosen inside my chest as I heard a few congratulatory hoots and cheers from the peanut gallery, one in particular from an Izuku Midoriya. I puffed up my chest and gave him a confident smirk but I wasn't allowed to bask in my victory for long. This was a free-for-all and I wouldn't remain Queen for long if I wasn't careful. However, once I saw what kind person I was facing next, my small sliver of confidence only grew bigger as my smirk morphed into a wicked grin. I couldn't remember my opponent's, having only seen him show up for practice a handful of times. All that I needed to know was that he was a Form III. If this were a weapon triangle in a video-game, lances were supposed to beat swords. Whoever had come up with that logic clearly hadn't experienced actual combat with a lance, otherwise they would have realized just how futile it was for them to get a hit in when a defensive weapon like that was put into close-quarters up against a well-balanced offensive style like mine.

The instant that he set up in his own deep engarde, I unleashed a barrage of horizontal attacks, flowing like a river stream until he just couldn't get his block up fast enough; then I came down like a goddamned waterfall. Crash! My saber went into his side with a dull thunk and it was over. The Bloody Queen had taken down another victim. Nothing personal.

"Nice job, Alyssa!" Izuku cheered, only increasing my resolve to prove myself more as my next opponent stepped forward, a Form IV named Uruki. She was more tricky, having short, asymmetrical duel-sabers about as long as her arms. She held one up like an ice pick and the other in a more offensive stance. Most people assumed that dual-wielding was better than having one sword, that having two weapons attacking somehow made you unstoppable, when in actuality it made you more vulnerable. Unless you were ambidextrous, wielding two swords at the same time even with proper training of both hands gave you more work to perfect for correct strikes and blocks- and I exploited the shit out of that weakness.

"'Good, good. Let the hate flow through you,'" Ishikami quoted as a mild-mannered jab, lowering his voice to sound like a frog croak while I snickered and wailed on Uruki's silver lightsabers, striking true until my blade tasted flesh. I let out a victorious whoop and pumped my fist in the air before gently tapping it against Uruki's glove. Drunk from three consecutive victories, something that I had never achieved before in a match, I failed to notice the teal lightsaber closing in from behind. If this had been a video-game, I would have at least heard some sort of Latin chorus as an ominous warning before getting skewered by an overpowered secret boss. I did not have that luxury, the music playing in the background being some sort of lo-fi remix from one of the instructors' music playlists, a poor substitute, although the concerned shouts from the other students were a big help.

In a moment of panic with a fraction of a second to react, I finally noticed my headmaster and dodged, saber inches from my shoulder, and swung with all my might in the hopes of being able to block his strike, praying that I had scared him off with the force of my swing long enough for me to back up and find my footing again. I felt the tip of my sword just barely graze his t-shirt as he ducked back. Then the world titled on its axis and I was suddenly on the ground, my stomach flat on the floor with my arms and legs splayed out and my saber cast off in front of me.

A collection of gasps came from the peanut gallery as my head caught up with the rest of me. What the hell had just happened? My face burned as I avoided the dozen pairs of eyes on me as I picked myself up off the ground, trying not to imagine everyone thinking about how hilarious it was to watch an overweight amazon bite the dust by doing something so gauche as to fall over during a fight. Damned clumsy feet.

"I'm fine. I'm fine. No harm done," I waved off to ease everyone's concern, feeling the ache of the fall and crash of adrenaline that came with it, but no other notable pain persisted. Assuming everything had been alright had been my first mistake.

"Do you think I'm trying to hurt you?" Mikaeru asked in flat tone, his arms crossed in clear disappointment.

"No..?" I replied with some confusion.

"Do you not trust me enough to think that I would ever try to hurt you?"

"Wh- no."

"Then why are you putting one hundred percent into your strikes?" he inquired with an incredulous and somewhat disappointed tone. I hung my head, eyes focused on his black unisole shoes that he wore with no socks. Who didn't wear socks with shoes? Then my thoughts caught up with the last thing he had said. So that was what had happened? It wasn't improper footing then... I thought as I fought against cluttered thoughts that kept piling up inside my head, but apparently it was meant to be rhetorical as he continued with his lecture. "You never put one hundred percent into one swing."

"I know..."

"It makes you off-balanced and can cause injury to others," his voice was stern but not cruel as he said, "Ten laps." My eyes shot up to meet his, although they were obscured by a black visor, the rest of his face neutral in expression.

"What? But I didn't even hit you," I exclaimed in utter shock, finally able to get my thoughts together enough to form a coherent sentence. "That wasn't even going to be a head-shot. I was just trying to get you away-"

"Doesn't matter. That kind of recklessness will get you and other people hurt. Ten laps." Hot tears pricked the back of my eyes as I felt my hands begin to shake before I clenched them into fists as I began to run, trying to curb my anxiety. Don't you dare cry over something stupid like this. You're not even sad, and he wasn't being mean, so don't you dare cry over this, you wuss. You're just acting like a spoiled child if you let something like this bother you, a sore loser. It's your own fault for becoming cocky and overconfident by thinking you could ever catch up to your other classmates' skill levels-

"Are you okay? You had a really bad spill back there," Izuku asked, interrupting my internal tirade. For a split second, I panicked and wondered if he could hear my thoughts or I was projecting my thoughts out loud again before I let out an uneasy laugh.

"Oh yeah, I'm fine. At least I can say I went down swinging," I joked in a sardonic, self-deprecating manner in a half-hearted attempt to cheer myself up with the terrible pun, wanting to forget about the shame and utter self-loathing that wrapped around me like a cloak. I tried doing my meditation and deep breathing exercises, but it was so hard to breathe after doing ten laps and trying to keep everyone from seeing how winded I was, how desperate I wanted to gasp for air.

"For the record, I thought you looked really cool."

"Really? Me falling on my ass without even getting hit was cool to you?" I chuckled in disbelief, trying to conceal my wounded pride.

"Not that, the other stuff. Those fights you did before were amazing! I certainly can't do any of that."

"Oh sure you could. You just need a little practice. Everyone here has been at this way longer than me. I've only been here for a couple of months. The only reason I could beat anyone was because they are learning a new sword techniques."

"Even so, I can tell that you've put in a lot of time and effort. It really shows. I can tell that you're really passionate about this."

"Yeah, you've come so far since you started here," Itsuki chimed in with a nod from Uruki. Unsure what to do with the barrage of compliments, I mumbled 'thanks' and tried to keep my voice from breaking, keeping my eyes towards the floor as I felt my throat constrict. Izuku's kindness only made me want to cry more, but I refused to let my emotions win. I had already given into them way too much during the class, my psyche a see-saw of emotions as they became irrational and unmanageable. I needed somewhere quiet to cool down and forget everything. There is no emotion, there is peace...

I am definitely going to be feeling this tomorrow, I thought as I experimentally bent my knees to see if everything was in working order. Then, this time jogging across the room with my eyes focused forward, trying to channel the spike of adrenaline that wracked through my body. When I had finished my laps, the clock read 19:40pm and I leaned forward on my knees utterly drained of energy, physically and emotionally. Everyone began peeling off their equipment and packing away their sabers. Since this was a Wednesday class which had fewer students, there was no defense drill or group lightsaber picture at the end. I was pulling my feet out of my tight-laced, unisole wrestling shoes when one of the Form IIs, a well-endowed stocky woman by the name of Mizuki, came over and asked, "Hey newbie, you want to join us for some drinks? We're about to hit the bar a couple blocks from here." Thinking she was referring to me, since I had been the newest member, I was about to turn her down when Izuku spoke up. Since he had been swarmed by other students while I had been running laps, I hadn't even realized he had come back until he was standing right behind me.

"Umm... sure. That sounds like a great idea," he said somewhat nervously.

"What about you, Alyssa? You're coming too, right?"

I wrinkled my nose in disgust internally. I wasn't particularly interested in going out in general, much less for drinks and even less when I had no time to mentally prepare myself for it ahead of time, not to mention I was in no mood to stick around after a long gross workout, feeling the ache and embarrassment from earlier still etched into my skin. I also really needed to work on my pages for tonight since I couldn't focus on them at all during the oncology appointment. Then I made the mistake of looking at Izuku. His hopeful eyes pleaded 'you are coming right? Please don't leave me alone with a bunch of people who just kicked my butt with plastic swords.'

Comforted by the thought of being needed, I, with some reluctance, shrugged and impulsively agreed, "Sure. Why not? I can't leave Izuku to fend off by himself against this rowdy crowd. Friends stick together, right?" The joy from his beaming smile was so contagious that I found myself smiling along with him. Going out wasn't the worst thing in the world and I was pretty hungry. Maybe going out with everyone would curb my hangry-ness. What could go wrong?


Author's Note: Sorry for the chapter delay. I was pretty wiped out last week, and with all of the packing I've been doing in trying to move into a new apartment, motivation and energy have been low so I gave myself a week off break from writing. I promise it is not from writer's block. If I have spotted release updates, you now know why.

References today include the Queen of Hearts from Lewis Carroll's Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, Mad Max Thunderdome, Fist of the North Star, the weapons triangle from Fire Emblem, and Sephiroth from Final Fantasy VII.

Hero/Villain Profiles

Name: Yakobu Chihaya
Form: II (Instructor-in-training)
Quirk: Switcheroo
He can trade objects with someone from over four hundred feet away if he wills it. They have to be in his line of sight and he has to be holding an object of a similar size or density in order for this to work.

Name: Katsuro Ishikami
Form: V
Quirk: Stone Hair
His Quirk causes his hair to have a mineral-like quality that strengthens the keratin in his body, not really something he can turn off. It gives him neck problems as a result and has stunted his growth a bit over the years.
Fun Fact: He is roommates with Katsura but neither will ever pursue the other romantically due to their mutual appreciation of the female form.

Name: Kilala (born 'Daichi') Takehashi
Form: V (Adjunct Instructor)
Quirk: Aloe Vera
Her Quirk gives her the ability to produce restorative slime that cures skin rashes and other ailments.
Fun Fact: Kilala is actual a transgender woman.

Name: Kimiko 'Kimundo' Uruki
Form: IV
Quirk: Hormone
Her Quirk gives her to ability to change the hormonal balance in her body, giving her the appearance of a man or a woman depending on the output of testosterone or estrogen in her body.

Name: Keri Itsuki
Form: VI
Quirk: Hair Color Change
Her hair color changes depending on her mood, her default color being black. This caused her many problems when growing up in school that did not allow bleached hair.

Name: Tsubaki Yuugen
Form: VI
Quirk: Wallflower
If unnoticed and if she decides not to say anything, Tsubaki can blend in seamlessly into the background.
Fun Fact: Her name and Quirk is based on the camellia flower, which is odorless.