"It's me." He said as he knocked on her door.
"Come in." She said wearily.
"I didn't see you at breakfast." He said cautiously. "I thought maybe I'd bring something over and we could have breakfast together."
"You want to talk about last night." She said with an awkward half-smile.
"We don't have to." He said, setting her dining room table. "But I think we should at some point."
"No point dragging it out. What do you want to know?" She asked, taking a seat.
Severus paused for a moment, considering where to begin.
"Why didn't you ever mention that you're a metamorphmagus?" He asked, now pouring her a drink.
She paused, taking a bite of her bagel.
"I don't really act on it anymore, so I guess I just didn't think it mattered."
"Why not? You're so creative, I'd think you'd enjoy being able to express yourself that way."
"You saw how out of hand it got." She said, chewing her food before continuing. "I lost sight of who I was. I wasn't using it to express myself, I was using it to impress other people... and one day I realized that I didn't want to be liked for being someone I wasn't."
"That's very wise." He said, sipping his tea. "I'm not sure I would have come to the same conclusion if I'd been in your shoes. I would have given anything for a chance to re-invent myself at that age. Maybe my life would have taken a different course."
Theda was taken aback by this. Severus hadn't talked much about his school years before. He seemed so unconcerned with other people's opinions now, it was hard to imagine him trying to win his classmates' approval.
"Well... it's probably better that way. It didn't do me much good."
"It was strange seeing you with such drastically different features." He said as he began picking at his scrambled eggs.
"Yeah, I can imagine... I was always trying to become the 'perfect' girl... which is drastically different from what I actually am."
"I think..." He paused. "You look much better as yourself."
She stopped eating, looking up at him.
"Not that my opinion matters." He continued.
"No, it's... it's actually really nice to hear that." She smiled. "Thank you."
Severus was unsure what to say next, so he thought it best to change the subject.
"I'm sorry about your parents."
"Hah!" Theda scoffed. "It's quite a mess, isn't it? I spent so many years hating my father, wondering how he could abandon me... only to find out that it wasn't his fault. All those years I spent wishing my mom would come back for me when she was the one who destroyed our family." She took a long sip of her tea, which was now getting cold.
"Were you angry with Sylvia for waiting so long to tell you?"
"No. Not at all, actually. She did what she thought was best. I don't know if I would have done the same thing if the roles were reversed, but I think she was trying to spare me a lot of pain. She didn't want me to hate my mother. And I don't. My mother was... unstable. But I know it's not her fault. "
"From what I could tell, it seemed like your struggle with your invoquing abilities began around the time you started school. Does that sound about right?"
"Maybe. That's definitely when I first became aware of it, but to be fair, I was never really around anyone other than my grandmother for most of my childhood so it's hard to say for sure."
"Could you ever pick up on her feelings?"
Theda smiled.
"Yes, but I think that may have just been because of how close we were. We understood each other on a very deep level."
"Hmm. It seemed like in your later school years you were handling it better, for the most part. You were able to attend classes without it being too much of a problem?"
"Oh, for sure. Once I had time to adjust it became easier to ignore. Even now I find it a lot easier to be around the students than it was the first few weeks of the school year."
"That's good." He said as he continued eating.
There was an awkward silence, and Severus could tell she was hoping that was the end of his questions.
"I, uh... feel like we should talk about that scene with Douglas." She said.
This comment was so unexpected that Severus started choking on his breakfast.
"We really don't have to." He said, still coughing.
"I just... I'm sorry you had to see that." She said with an awkward laugh. "And I'm sorry that I kind of lost it afterward. I already had a lot of feelings come up throughout that whole session and I wasn't expecting to see that scene with Douglas. I hadn't thought about that night in a long time."
"You don't need to apologize to me. I'm the one who's sorry. I really hope you understand that it was a mistake and not something I was looking to stumble upon."
"I believe you. I just wanted to make sure it wasn't going to make things weird between us."
"Not at all." He said, dabbing his mouth with a napkin.
"I appreciate that, Severus. Let's just forget about it."
He nodded.
"Shall we plan another session for next Saturday?"
"Sure. I think that gives me enough time to emotionally recover." She laughed.
The following week was fairly uneventful. Theda spent the first three school nights hosting detention for Neville, which she actually quite enjoyed as she got the chance to get to know him a little better. She had him grading paperwork, and once he got into the rhythm of it, it seemed to actually relax him.
After Neville's detentions, Severus would join her in her chambers as he had nearly every night. They mostly used the time to catch up on work, each enjoying the comfortable silence.
On Friday she sat in on Snape's class again, which went much more smoothly than the last one had. When the class was over, the two of them made their way to dinner, and as they entered the Great Hall they were met with a display of levitating Jack-o-lanterns and orange streamers. It was at this moment they both realized that the following day was Halloween.
"I totally didn't realize we scheduled our next session for Halloween night," Theda said, bringing her palm to her forehead. "We can reschedule it if you want to."
Severus seemed more irritated than the situation warranted, but he assured her that there was no need to reschedule.
The next morning Theda took a trip to the library to return her current stack of books. As she was looking for her next batch to rent she saw Severus sitting at a small table tucked away in the corner behind a large bookshelf.
"What are you reading?" She asked curiously. "It must be good because you were too engrossed to see me come in."
"It's excellent, in fact." He said, closing the book and displaying the cover for her to see. It was one of her books, Onmyōji: Masters of Divination in Japan's Heian Period.
"Actually, I think that's some of my weakest work." She said with a small laugh. "I recommend Heka's Gift To Egypt: 3,000 Years of Magic."
"I'll be sure to read that one next."
"Are we still on for tonight?" She asked.
"Of course. Shall we say 4:00?"
"It's a date." She said before leaving him to return to his reading.
As she was leaving the library she nearly walked right through the ghost of a beautiful young woman.
"Oh, sorry Helena. I didn't see you there."
"No harm done." She replied politely.
"It's been a while. Are you on your way somewhere?"
"Yes, actually. Sir Nicholas' 500th deathday party. All the school ghosts are attending."
"Deathday party, huh? That sounds like a lot of fun!" Theda said enthusiastically.
"I expect it'll be quite enjoyable. You'll never guess who's coming!"
"Who?"
"Harry Potter." She said, grinning. "That's all Sir Nicholas has wanted to talk about for days."
"Why would Mr. Potter attend a deathday party? That doesn't strike me as something he'd find particularly enjoyable."
"Well, rumor has it that Nicholas mostly invited him for the clout. I have a feeling he's hoping it'll gain him some points with the Headless Hunt."
Theda's heart ached for the boy as she imagined what it must be like to carry the weight of fame at such a young age.
"Well, I hope you enjoy yourself, Helena. Wish Nicholas a happy deathday for me!"
"I will. See you around, Theda."
As 4:00 rolled around Theda headed for the dungeons, which were festively decorated with hanging bats and bubbling cauldrons. When she entered Severus' chambers, however, they were as drearily and sparsely decorated as ever.
"I think it would benefit you to learn the basics of occlumency," Severus said abruptly without any greetings or pleasantries.
"Occlumency?" She asked. "Why?"
"Because it will teach you control. If you can learn to seal your mind from legilimens, perhaps you'll find it easier to exercise control over your invoquor abilities."
"Alright, well I'm willing to give anything a go at this point. Let's try it."
"Sit." He said, pulling up a chair for her. "I'm going to invade your mind. You will attempt to block me. Any questions?"
"Umm, just one... how exactly am I supposed to go about blocking you?"
"I'm going to be exploring your memories, much like last time. Don't give in to the emotions they may conjure up. Try to clear your thoughts. I can only see what you allow yourself to see."
"Okay, I'll try."
"Legilimens!"
Theda was sitting in her dad's lap reading him a book about caterpillars.
She was a teenager trying on clothes in a dressing room, pinching her stomach as it hung over the waistline of her skirt.
She was showing Marius and Hugh what she looked like naturally as they were covering their mouths in shock.
She was looking through her camera's viewfinder, sneaking a shot of Douglas as he held his hand in front of his face in embarrassment.
"Well?" He said impatiently as he returned his attention to the room. "Why didn't you resist?"
"I thought I was resisting... or at least trying to."
"I felt no resistance at all. Try again."
She was visiting Sylvia's grave, resting flowers at the base of her headstone.
Douglas was dancing with her under a gazebo beside a lake.
She was shaking hands with members of a rural island tribe.
"I can still see everything. Whatever you're doing isn't working. Try harder."
This continued for some time, Severus becoming more and more impatient as Theda struggled to push him out of her mind.
"Enough!" She finally said after at least a dozen failed attempts. "I need a break."
"Fine."
"Can I get something to drink?"
"Help yourself." He said, gesturing towards the kitchen as he slumped into a seat at the table, looking terribly perturbed.
Theda opened the refrigerator and got herself a glass bottle of cold gillywater. As she was looking for a bottle opener she spotted a tattered and faded photo sitting on the countertop.
"Who's this?" She asked, holding up the photo.
Severus lunged at her, snatching the photo from her hands.
"That's none of your concern." He said, tucking it into his robes.
"Oh, so you get to spend all night exploring all my painful memories to your heart's content, and I'm not allowed to ask a simple question about a photograph you left sitting out in the open?"
Severus was clearly peeved by her comments, but he seemed to consider them nonetheless.
"It's Lily." He said after a long exhale.
"I thought as much." She said sympathetically. "She was beautiful."
"Yes, she was." There was a long pause before he continued. "Tonight is the anniversary of her death. Eleven years, officially."
Theda suddenly understood why he'd been in such a mood all night.
"I told you I didn't mind rescheduling, Severus. You should have told me." She said, her hand lightly resting on his shoulder. "I think maybe you need to be alone tonight. Do you want me to go?"
"No, don't go. Please."
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"No. Not yet."
"Alright. I'll stay but I think we should be done training for the night." She said, grabbing his hand and leading him to the couch. "I'll make us some tea."
She did just that, and once it was ready she handed Severus his cup before taking a seat beside him. They said nothing to each other for a long time, which neither of them seemed to mind. She couldn't help but think about poor Harry, attending a deathday party on the same day his parents had been murdered just so that a ghost could boast about having him as a guest.
"Do you ever feel guilty?" Severus asked, breaking the long silence. "For what happened to Douglas?"
"Of course I do." She said, matter-of-factly. "He made the deliberate choice to end it all. Didn't leave a note or anything. I constantly ask myself if it was because of something I did. Or maybe something I didn't do. I replay our last days together over and over in my head, trying to pinpoint what I could have possibly done wrong."
He said nothing, just nodding his head as he stared blankly at the floor, his face like stone.
"I hope you don't think Lily's death was your fault, Severus. She was killed by You-Know-Who. He's the only one to blame."
Severus remained silent, but Theda hoped he was absorbing her words.
"You know what I think we could both use? A little walk around the grounds. Hmm? Some fresh air on a crisp autumn night? How does that sound?"
He nodded his head in agreement, then followed her out into the hall.
"Do you mind if we stop by my room so I can grab a coat?"
"Not at all." He said, following her up the stairs.
As they were making their way toward her room, they were stopped in their tracks by something unusual. The floor was covered in a pool of water. As they began searching for the source of the water, Theda froze as she caught sight of a message written crudely in blood across the wall. Before she could read it, Severus jutted in front of her, holding his arms out at his sides so that his cloak blocked her view.
"Stay behind me." He said sternly as he proceeded with caution, scoping out the corridor in search of some explanation.
As he peered his head around the corner, he was horrified by what he saw: Harry Potter, his hand on Filch's cat, Mrs. Norris, who was hanging rigidly by her tail from one of the torch brackets mounted on the wall.
"Potter!" He shouted as he charged towards him, Theda quickly following behind. At that exact moment, Minerva and a group of students turned down the hall from the opposite direction, as did Gilderoy and Filch.
Filch took a look at Harry, muttering under his breath until Mrs. Norris' lifeless body caught his attention.
"You... murdered... my cat." He said with a crazed look in his eyes. "I'll kill ya." He grabbed Harry by the collar. "I'LL KILL YA!"
"Argus, I—" came Dumbledore's voice as he rounded the corner, joining the now overcrowded hall. As soon as he had time to assess the situation he sent all the students back to their dormitories, apart from Harry and his friends.
"She's not dead, Argus, but she has been petrified."
"Ah! Thought so. So unlucky I wasn't there. I know exactly the counter-curse that could have spared her." Said Gilderoy, who didn't seem to notice the collective eye-rolls from the other staff.
"How she has been petrified, I cannot say." Dumbledore continued.
"Ask him!" Filch said, gesturing to Harry. "It's him that's done it! You saw what he wrote on the wall!"
"It's not true, sir, I swear." Harry pleaded, looking at Dumbledore. "I never touched Mrs. Norris."
"If I might, Headmaster," Severus interjected. "The circumstances are suspicious. I happened to see Mr. Potter touching the cat only moments before you all arrived. It would appear to me that the boy is obviously our culprit. Who knows what he may have been able to accomplish if he hadn't been interrupted."
He felt a tug on his sleeve and turned to see Theda shaking her head at him as if to suggest that she knew something he did not.
"I didn't hurt her!" Harry shouted. "I had just found her when Snape came charging at me! How do we know he didn't do it?" Harry glared at Severus. "Why were you even on this floor?"
"I'm afraid that's my doing," Theda explained. "I can vouch for Severus. I've been with him all night. We were heading to my room so I could get something warm to wear so we could take a walk outside."
Severus smiled smugly at Harry, silently gloating as Harry's face looked increasingly puzzled.
"And we've been with Harry all night." Hermione insisted. "We were heading back to the common room when we found Mrs. Norris."
"Innocent until proven guilty, Severus," Dumbledore said as Severus' smile faded away.
"My cat has been petrified." Filch persisted. "I WANNA SEE SOME PUNISHMENT!"
"We will be able to cure her, Argus. As I understand it, Madame Sprout has a very healthy growth of mandrakes. When matured, a potion will be made which will revive Mrs. Norris." He swiveled his head, scanning the room. "In the meantime, I strongly urge caution... to all."
"What the hell was that all about?" Severus demanded after everyone had dispersed.
"I was trying to let you know that it wasn't Mr. Potter. I happen to have an alibi for him."
"Alibi? What alibi?"
"He was at Sir Nicholas' deathday party tonight. It couldn't have been him."
"You only know that he was supposed to be at the party. How do you know he actually went?"
"It wouldn't be that hard to find out. All we'd have to do is ask any of the school ghosts."
"Even if he did attend the party, he could have petrified the cat after he left."
He had a point.
"Well even if that is technically possible, I don't think he'd do a thing like that. Do you?"
"I wouldn't put it past him. He's constantly getting into trouble. Have you forgotten the incident with the flying car? He's an attention-seeking fool who never thinks about consequences. This is exactly the sort of thing he'd do."
"Having a knack for trouble is one thing, but writing pureblood supremacist threats on the wall in blood seems a bit more sinister than your typical school prank, don't you think?"
"Well, I can't think of anyone else who would do this sort of thing. It may seem far-fetched to you, but trust me, I know him and I wouldn't put this past him."
"Innocent until proven guilty, I suppose." She said with a slight shrug. "I hope Filch's cat will be alright."
"That cat is foul," Snape said with disgust.
"Not an animal person?"
"I wouldn't say that." In truth, Severus had always had a fondness for animals as he felt they usually made better friends and companions than most people. "But that Mrs. Norris is not your average pet. Anyway, I think I could use some fresh air now more than ever. Still up for that walk?"
"Absolutely. Let me just grab my coat."
