Disclaimer: I only own my OCs

A/N: This was a fun chapter to write. We get some angst, some foreshadowing (FYI I really do feel like the writers messed up with everything Whitmore), we get some fun and we get some smut ;) all of your favourite things! And I am trying to prove that I really do love Stefan, I promise!

XXX

I had insisted on burying Heather's body. I knew that it meant that she would forever be labelled as a missing person. But it was a lot easier than trying to fake her cause of death. This wasn't one that the Council, well, what remained of the Council, could get involved in. This had to remain a secret. So, I buried her in the woods.

I marked her grave with wild flowers. I couldn't give her a proper burial, but I could give her that. It was a little bit of prettiness, for her unmarked grave. Something that could me find it, so I could remember her death. She deserved that. To have someone visit her grave. I made a note to find out when her birthday was, so that I could leave flowers on that day.

Once I was done, I sat down on the ground in front of her, uncaring of the sweat and dirt and blood that stained my clothes. I just couldn't bring myself to leave her side. Leaving, walking away, would just remind me that she couldn't. That Heather's life was over, forever, because of me. The guilt that I felt, it was overwhelming. It turned my stomach, it lingered in the back of my mind, constantly reminding me of its presence. I had felt guilt before, but never like this. I knew that it was my heightened emotions, courtesy of my new vampire self. But I had also never taken an innocent life before. My evil side had killed Bill Forbes. And Esther was far from innocent, especially since she was about to kill Matt and Jeremy when I killed her. But Heather? She was as innocent as they came. A sweet girl who was kind to everyone, who wanted to be everyone's friend.

Damon sighed and sat down next to me, wrapping an arm around my shoulders, tucking me into his side. I wrapped my arms around his waist, moving as close to him as possible. He hadn't judged me, not when I had killed Heather, nor when I had insisted on burying her. He just remained by my side, a comforting presence. One that I didn't deserve. Not after what I had done.

"How are you doing?" he asked, resting his chin on my head as the sun slowly rose behind us. I sighed heavily, struggling to think of an answer. I had all these thoughts buzzing in my head, full of guilt and shame and frustration.

"Not good," I eventually mumbled, lightly tugging on his jumper. I paused before adding quietly, almost silently, unwilling to actually put the dark thoughts out into the open. "Is this when vampires consider turning it off?"

My boyfriend breathed in through his teeth, clearly caught off guard with my words. I didn't blame him. Turning it off was something that I had said was something that I didn't want to do. But here I was, considering it. Because I had taken the life of an innocent, which was also something that I didn't think that I would do.

"Some do," he eventually admitted before gently grasping my chin, forcing me to meet his gaze. "But you will not, Alexandria. You will not let this death of this Heather girl break you. You are stronger than that. You were just following your natural instincts. We are a predatory species, who enjoy the feed and the kill. You just need more time to settle into that."

"Right," I frowned, my mind whirring at his words. "But it doesn't feel right. Like, I feel so broken up about her death, how can that be following my vampire instincts?"

"Because you are still new at this," Damon leaned forward to nuzzle my nose. "It'll get easier. Not that I am going to let you kill anyone else. But if it happens again, it won't be as bad as this."

"I feel like you're teaching me all the naughty things," I closed my eyes as Damon shifted me onto his lap, hands gently stroking my spine. I knew what he was doing. He was trying to distract me from the horrible thoughts running through my head, from the guilt that was churning my stomach. And it was working far too well.

"Well, Stefan definitely wouldn't approve of what I was saying," my boyfriend shrugged, smirking when I giggled. "But he never learnt how to do this properly. He has spent so long being afraid of what he is, that he ignores all of his instincts." As I pondered his words, he gently tapped my ass, urging me to my feet. "Now come on, let's get you home and cleaned up, we're off to college today."

I let Damon lead me back to his car, thinking deeply. I was still feeling guilty over what I did, and I knew that I would for a long time. Heather didn't deserve what had happened to her. I did wonder, briefing, if I was feeling bad because I knew her. If this had happened to someone that I didn't know, would I still be feeling the same? But I dismissed that thought. Because I really didn't want to know what that said about me.

But I wanted to believe Damon's words. That I was just following my vampire instincts. Should I have been in control of them? Probably, yeah. But I was feeling weak after my run in with the werewolf venom. If it hadn't had been for that, then I might have been able to stop before I killed her. It was moot point, as I would never know now for sure. But it was a thought to keep me going. Because until I tried to feed from someone again, I would have no idea how much this would affect me.

A part of me was surprised by how well I had accepted his words. That killing someone was just a new instinct of mine. But I wanted to believe his words. Because if he was right, then I wasn't failing at being a vampire. That I hadn't made a huge mistake in wanting this. If it was just who I was now, then I could control that, I could take steps to make sure that I didn't follow that instinct.

XXX

After I showered, I made my way downstairs and into the library. I had heard voices in their earlier, while I made myself presentable. So I decided to see what was going on. Even though Connor was dead, I still had the feeling that something else was going to disturb the uneasy peace in town, so the sooner that I could get involved, the sooner I could do something about it.

I paused when I stepped into the library. There were numerous boxes in the room, sitting on the floor, on the sofa, on the coffee table. And in the middle of them all, stood Stefan. He was examining a stake, one that had a symbol carved into it. It looked like the one in the stake that the hunter had tried to use on Klaus in the hospital yesterday.

"Uh, been to a garage sale, Stef?" I asked, making my way over to the booze table. I poured myself a whiskey as I settled onto the sofa. The younger Salvatore glanced over at me as I crossed my legs, picking up one off of the table.

"Damon is responsible for all of these," Stefan shook his head with a small smile before glancing past me. "So, what is all of this?"

I frowned and followed his gaze, seeing my boyfriend walk into the room with another box on his shoulder. He put it down on the table behind me as I snorted, "Geez, how long was I in that shower for?"

"Long enough," he gave me a look before complaining about me using up all his hot water. I just sniggered and sipped at my drink. I knew that he didn't mind too much. After last night, I think he was just happy that I wasn't crying anymore. "Just some personal items that I snaked from the vampire hunter's RV. May he rest in peace. I'm searching for a supernatural handbook."

Both of them ignored my sniggered, "Rest in pieces."

Was it being petty? Yep. But considering what he had done to my loved ones, I felt absolutely no guilt in laughing about his death. As far as I was concerned, he deserved what he got.

"And you know for a fact that he was supernatural?" Stefan raised a disbelieving eyebrow as Damon started pulling stuff out of the box. It looked like a terrifying version of a chemistry set, used for playing with werewolf venom.

"Definitely wasn't natural," my boyfriend pointed out as I leant over to examine the gun cases in front of me. There was a scary amount of them. I knew that we were a bit gung-ho about guns in this country, but even so, this was a bit much. "The guy magically appeared just as someone blows up the entire Founders Council. He's covered in a tattoo that only Jeremy Gilbert, of all people in the world, seems to be able to see." Say what? When was I going to be told about this? Honestly, I needed to tell off that kid. He knew better than to keep stuff from me. "Klaus mentioned something about him being one of The Five." Stefan looked up at that, seeming interested in that revelation. "Then he kamikazes himself with explosives. Sound natural to you?"

"What's The Five?" his brother immediately asked, completely disregarding the rest of what was said. I wondered why he was so interested in that. I mean, yeah, Klaus had mentioned in yesterday. But with the dude being dead, it felt a bit pointless in digging into it. As far as I was concerned, it would just be one of those numerous things that Klaus knew about and if I didn't ask about it, then I couldn't come back and bite me in the ass.

"That's what I'm hoping is in the first chapter of the handbook," Damon rolled his eyes as he continued pulling weapons out of the box. He was interrupted by the ringing of his phone. He answered the call, leaning the phone between his ear and his shoulder as he continued looking for the desired handbook. "Liz Forbes, my favourite sheriff." He paused, gun in hand, a worried look forming on his face. "What? That's… concerning. Keep me posted." He hung up the call and, without looking at either of us, continued his search.

I narrowed my eyes and finished my drink. I knew what he was doing. He was being a little shit. He wanted one of us to ask what the conversation was about. But I was going to play his games. If it was important, I knew that I would find out. But until then, I was determined to win this little battle.

Unfortunately, Stefan's curiosity was not so easy quelled, "What?" he scoffed, shaking his head. "You're not gonna tell us?"

"Can't tell you," Damon shrugged casually, giving me a wink. "It's private. Besides, we're in a fight."

"FML," I groaned, rolling my eyes. "What are you two old women bickering about this time?"

"We're not in a fight," Stef told me, shaking his head at his brother. "He's just being dramatic."

"I mean, that is believable," I shrugged, standing up so that I could probably glance between the two. "But I heard you two fighting last night. So come on, spill."

"He's mad at me about yesterday," Damon rolled his eyes, tugging me forward and into his arms. "He blames me for you getting poisoned with werewolf venom."

"Yeah, I'm mad at you about that, but we're not in a fight," Stefan contradicted and I sighed loudly.

"You're both idiots," I pointed my finger at the younger brother before poking my vampire in the chest. "You do know that if I had gone to Rebekah's party, then I would have gotten poisoned there, right? Connor put the venom in the beer before heading to the hospital. Matt texted me, apologising cos he thought that it was because of that that I got sick." When the pair of them looked surprised, I nodded, "So, now you two can kiss and makeup. Okay?"

Neither of them would admit it, but it was okay. So, in an attempt to play nice, Damon offered, "Very well, then. They didn't find any remains at the explosion site."

"Well fuck," I rolled my eyes and groaned. Of course, they didn't. Why didn't that surprise me? Honestly, that Connor was a right pain in my ass. Couldn't even die when he was blowing up hospital rooms.

"So, Connor's still out there," Stef shook his head. But he didn't sound surprised either. Guess that was just the bullshit that we dealt with in lovely old Mystic Falls.

"Apparently so," Damon nodded before gesturing towards his brother. "I'm gonna need you to get on this today. I have to take Alexa to college."

Stefan looked surprised at that piece of news, "I'm sorry, you two are going to college?"

"Yep," I nodded before anyone could say anything else. "I need to get out of town for a bit after yesterday, so we're gatecrashing Bonnie's trip to see the dude that took over from her grams. And I'll be taking advantage of the new atmosphere to grow my confidence on the snatch, eat, erase technique."

Stefan didn't look happy, but he didn't argue. I was surprise. He had been so adamant before that I try his version of doing things. But maybe he had seen that I was getting the hang of this. And as far as I was concerned, he would continue to think that. No one would find out what happened to Heather. It would forever be my dirty little secret."

"Perfect," Damon cupped my face before giving me a quick kiss. "Now, I need to sort out a couple of things before we can leave, so go play with Stefan for a while."

XXX

Stefan had taken Damon's words a bit too literally, as he had grabbed some arrows from Connor's collection before taking me into the woods. I couldn't stop myself from cracking jokes over how he was taking me into the woods to kill me. Stefan's disapproving roll of the eyes had amused me, but I had quickly stopped my jokes. They had gotten old after a while.

"So, Stef, why have you taken me out here?" I asked as the older vampire placed most of the arrows to the side, keeping one in his hand.

"Well, with Connor apparently still alive, I thought that it would be best to make sure that your self-defence skills are still up to scratch," he replied, flipping the arrow in his hand.

"Just that?" I frowned. "I thought that you were gonna use the opportunity to give me some Stefany words of wisdom," I deepened my voice mocking before saying, "Don't listen to Damon, Alexa. Don't be like Damon, Alexa. Why eat people when you can eat Bambi, Alexa?"

Stefan coughed back a laugh before shaking his head, "Someone is feeling a bit bitchy today."

I paused before shrugged, "I would be offended, but apparently, even though vampires technically don't need sleep, they can still get cranky if they don't get enough." I snorted and rolled my eyes, "Go figure."

"How come you didn't sleep well last night?" the older vampire asked just before he threw the arrow at me. I quickly dodged to the side, frowning at the arrow stuck in the tree behind me as I tried to think of the best excuse.

"I dunno, I guess being poisoned and the hallucinations it caused kinda got into my head," I tugged the arrow out of the wood, poking at the pointy end as I avoided his gaze.

"The evil alter ego," Stefan nodded before gesturing for me to throw the arrow back. I did as requested and the show off caught the arrow before it could get anywhere near him.

"Oh come on," I protested, pointing at the arrow with a grumpy expression, trying to avoid any difficult questions. "That's cheating. No one's taught me that yet."

"And I'm not going to," the other vampire laughed, throwing the arrow back at me. I was so distracted by my pouting, that I nearly didn't get out of the way in time. "I'm not going to be responsible for you getting hurt, Damon really would kill me." I nodded in agreement before he pointed out, "You were a little slow there. I almost got you."

"Yeah, well, you were distracting me," I rolled my eyes as I retrieved the arrow again. "That's called cheating. Besides, it's only metal, it won't kill me. And I won't tattle if I do get hurt. So come on, teach me." When Stefan continued to refuse to teach me the fancy trick, I narrowed my eyes and threw the arrow at him with all my strength. The little shit just dodged to the side, letting it fly through the air until it was out of sight. "Rude."

"You can't avoid the conversation forever," the older vampire pointed out as I grabbed another arrow.

I muttered, "Yeah, I can," before raising my voice, "The bitch just reminded me that it was easy to lose control." And she was right. "So I asked Damon to put me into different situations to test my control. And since I haven't managed to get out of going to college yet, I figured that dealing with my hunger in boring lectures would be a worthwhile endeavour."

Stefan was silent for a moment before asking, "What about Caroline? She's a genius at self-control."

I snorted and shook my head, "Speaking to Caroline is difficult right now. Thanks to Evil Alaric's little declaration about her dad. Besides, even if that wasn't the case, I couldn't go to her. She never had a hunger like I do. She's got too much self-control and she doesn't understand just how hard it is. Nah, this is the best way for me."

What I didn't mention was that I needed to get my confidence back. And I couldn't do that with anyone other than Damon. He knew what had happened, he knew what the signs were for me. And he was the only one that I trusted to keep me in check. So, no, I couldn't go to Caroline. Not about this. As much as I adored my friend, it just wasn't possible.

The older vampire was silent for a moment before sighing and nodding, "At least Damon will keep you safe."

"He'll keep me very safe," I agreed with a laugh, carefully adjusting my stance so that I could rush at Stefan. "You know, it's hilarious hearing you say that. I bet that if Damon was nearby, you wouldn't admit that at all."

Stefan gave me a look, "I will give my brother credit if it is needed."

"Only if you can't get out of it," I sniggered before speeding forward. I tackled Stefan to the ground, sitting on top of him as I pointed the arrow at his heart. "Take that, sucka."

The other vampire rolled his eyes before flipping me over, snatching the arrow from my grasp. He pointed it at my neck before shaking his head, "Things are a bit tense between me and my brother right now. But it'll get better again."

"Things aren't tense because of me, are they?" I frowned as Stefan got up, reaching down to pull me to my feet. "Cos I don't want that. You two shouldn't be fighting over me and my vampireness."

"No, we aren't," he was quick to reassure me. "Damon is just frustrated that he couldn't save you from this. You didn't turn on your terms, and I know that pains my brother. He's just lashing out and I'm a convenient target. It'll settle down."

"Well, it better," I sighed. "Because if it doesn't, I will intervene. And I'm strong enough to put you both on a time out now."

Stefan gave me an amused look and patted my shoulder, "Of course you are, Alexa."

XXX

Whitmore college was only a few hours drive away. But those hours felt like days. Elena had insisted on tagging along with us, using the excuse that she wanted to use the opportunity to see her potential college ahead of schedule. I just knew that she wanted to keep an eye on me. Stefan had apparently spilled the beans on why Damon and I were accompanying Bonnie. And my twin had gotten it in her head that she wanted to be involved in Damon's little lessons. It was incredibly tedious, but she wouldn't stay behind.

"So, Bonnie," I turned around in my seat to look at my witchy friend. She glanced up from where she was fiddling with the pendant that contained Ric's soul. My friend had taken to wearing it everywhere, wanting to keep it safe. I was definitely onboard with that plan, the last thing that we needed was to lose him in this state. "Tell me more about this professor you're going to go meet."

"His name is Professor Shane," she shrugged, glancing over at my sister. "He took over the occult studies post a few months back but he wanted to get settled before reaching out to me."

"Interesting," I nodded before wiggling my eyebrows. "Do you know if he's a looker? Cos I heard that rebound sex is amazing."

"Alexa," Bonnie laughed, shaking her head at me. I was just pleased at the smile on her face. I knew that the witches punishment had weighed heavily on her mind. And it had been far too long since I had seen that pretty smile. "I don't know what he looks like. Besides, I don't need rebound sex."

"Alright, how about regular sex?" I asked instead, enjoying the scandalised look on my twin's face. "Don't let the prude next to you stop you from enjoying yourself. If you need to scratch that itch, then I say go for it. There are plenty of fraternities around here, so have fun."

Elena shouted my name while Bon rolled her eyes at me, "I don't really feel comfortable discussing my sex life with Damon in the car."

"Eh, ignore him," I rolled my eyes as my boyfriend rested a hand high on my thigh. "The worst that he will do is reveal some very annoying details from our sex life. Which would be embarrassing for me but I feel like it would be worse for my sister."

"That's not any better!" my friend laughed, shaking her head as she giggled. "I don't really want to know anything about your sex life."

"You sure?" I wiggled my eyebrows. "Because I can give you tips."

"Oh god, Lexa, shut up!" my sister finally groaned, giving me a dirty look. "No one wants to discuss sex right now."

"Only because you aren't getting any," I shrugged, tapping Damon's fingers when they started stroking my inner thigh, sneaking under the hem of my dress. "Am I right or am I right?" I knew that it was his was of reminding me of how good he had been. Despite the numerous opportunities that he had to annoy Elena and Bonnie; he had kept quiet. I did appreciate that. I wanted them to see how good he could be. And this was one of those occasions where I could do that. Thankfully, my boyfriend also realised that, and was playing along perfectly.

"Just because me and Stefan are working back up to that doesn't mean anything," my twin sniffed, crossing her arms and looking out the window. But I could see how tense her body was. I hadn't been around the pair of them enough recently to know how their relationship was going. But I knew that it hadn't been smooth sailing. Stefan had a lot of shit to make up for, and not all of it had been directed at just my sister.

"Ellie, honey, darling, the light of my life," I sighed dramatically, reaching forward to tap her knee. "We all know that you would be getting physical with Stefan if you really wanted to." I exchanged a glance with Bonnie. "You know, you don't have to be a relationship with him if you don't want you. Don't feel obligated to be with him just cos he has his humanity back."

"I know that," Ellie protested, but she didn't look as though she believed her words. "And I will end it with him if I feel as though it is the right thing to do, but I just…"

"You don't know what the right thing to do is," Bon finished for her, her voice soft. I knew that our friend shared my reservations about Stefan. She had been on the receiving end of his asshole behaviour for a lot of it. "You feel as thought it is expected for you to be with him again, but you've changed and he has changed. It wasn't how it was before and now you don't know what to do. Because you don't want to hurt him and drive him into turning his humanity back off."

"How did this become an analysis of my relationship problems with Stefan?" Elena sighed, but she turned to face us properly, ready to hear what we suggested. Which was surprising. My sister normally got incredibly protective over her relationship with the younger Salvatore brother. Especially since they got back together after his asshole phase. So the fact that she was willing to listen to our advice on whether she should stay with him was a big deal.

"Because Alexa is an expert at deflecting the attention away from herself," Damon interjected, ignoring the look that I gave him. "Look, Elena, my brother won't turn his humanity off again for a long time. Even if you do break up with him. He'll mope and he'll brood and be completely insufferable, but he won't turn it off. So just do what feels right to you."

"Did Damon just give me good advice?" my sister frowned, glancing at Bonnie. The witch just stared at Damon through narrow eyes, probably trying to work out if this was a dream or reality.

"Damon always gives good advice," I rolled my eyes at the scepticism on their faces. I ignored their dubious expressions and mutters of 'no he doesn't', and wiggled my eyebrows, "And good sex."

I enjoyed the disgusted looks far more than I should have done.

XXX

The closer that we got to the college, the more tense Damon had become. The grip that he had on my thigh grew tighter, until I was forced to take his hand in mine. I didn't know what was wrong, as he hadn't said anything about Whitmore college before. He had given no indication that this was an issue for him until we got close. But the tension in his body was enough to worry me. A lot.

When we got to the college, and he pulled up in the parking lot, he kept a firm grip on my hand. The other two got out of the car, but I paused when he stayed where he was sitting. Damon had a blank look on his face as he glanced around the campus, scanning everything that he could see.

"Day?" I asked, keeping my voice soft as I encouraged my boyfriend to look at me. The blank look in his eyes was unnerving, but I tried to keep calm. As far as I could tell, there was nothing dangerous here, nothing had happened. And no one had reached out to us since we had left Mystic Falls. "Everything okay?"

"It's fine," he nodded sharply, but he didn't let go of my hand. "Come on, let's go before the other two find a way to cause trouble."

"Well, Elena is a trouble magnet," I joked carefully, trying to encourage one of his lovely smiles to form. But the most that I got was a twitch of the lips. It was worrying. But I knew that I wouldn't get any answers while Elena and Bonnie were around. There was no way that he would lower his walls and admit to any weaknesses in front of them.

By the time that he had walked around the car, Damon's mask was firmly in place, smirk included. I sighed internally as he wrapped an arm around my waist, tugging me close to him. I had no idea as to what had had happened, but it was enough that my boyfriend was completely on edge.

"Are you sure that you're okay with this?" my sister was asking our friend, a small frown on her face.

Bonnie shrugged casually, glancing over at me as she replied to my twin, "If I could spell Alexa out of wanting blood, I would, but I can't. So it's better that she learns control now and not at freshmen orientation."

"Even if I wasn't what I was, college was not going to be in my future," I rolled my eyes, gently prodding the witch in the shoulder. I ignored her previous words. I knew that my friend meant well, even if she didn't exactly like my new diet. "Despite what my darling sister over that might think."

"Oh come on, you mean to tell me that you don't want to party with all the sorority girls?" Damon smirked, wiggling his eyebrows. I groaned dramatically but I let him pretend that everything was alright. And that his weird little moment didn't happen. "Seriously, if I can go to college, you can go to college." He paused before adding, "If you want to."

"You went to college?" Bonnie exclaimed, looking shocked. I mean, she had a right to. Damon had never been one to champion education. Out of the brothers, Stefan was always the one who would go to college. So hearing that my boyfriend had was surprising.

"Sure, plenty of times," the older vampire shrugged before smirking. "I always had a thing for sorority girls."

"You're disgusting," Bon gave him a dirty look, glancing him up and down before shaking her head.

My vampire just took that as a challenge, as he leant in closer and purred, "I know."

"Hmm, maybe I should go to college just to be a sorority girl," I raised an eyebrow, glancing up at Damon as the other two walked away.

"If it gets you to college, then I don't care what it takes," Elena threw back over her shoulder with a shrug.

"She really does have an annoying hard-on about me going to college," I sighed, shaking my head at my twin. "It does get rather tiresome."

"I can imagine," Damon hummed, sounding distracted. I looked up at him to see him glancing around still. He tugged me closer into his side, almost wrapping himself around me. "Hey Bonnie, how long until this Professor Shane's lecture?"

"Uh," the witch glanced down at her watch before answering. "About an hour?"

"Super," my boyfriend muttered, looking anything but pleased. I knew that I needed to get answers. And I would not get them if Elena and Bonnie were around. So I did what I needed to, I sent them away. I knew that Bon would keep Ellie safe, so for once, I didn't have to worry about her. Instead, I would just be worrying about my vampire. It wasn't normally this way round, and it felt weird that it was. But something had gotten into Damon's head since we got close, and it worried me enough that I needed to find out what it was.

"Did you two want to check out some of the other lectures?" I suggested, not even bothering to be sly. "Get a head start for next year?"

"What are you going to be doing?" my twin frowned, glancing between me and Damon. I knew exactly what she was thinking. Elena had tagged along to make sure that Damon was properly teaching me control. And she couldn't keep an eye on that if I sent her away. Normally, I wouldn't care what she thought, but I wanted to protect Damon. But luckily, I knew of one thing that would work in successfully driving her away.

"Relax, Elena," I rolled my eyes teasingly. "I'm not going to be eating anyone. Me and Damon are just going to hang out…" I kept the right level of suggestion in my tone to keep my sister from asking any other questions. And from the disgusted look on her face, it had worked.

XXX

I tugged Damon over to the benches by the trees, forcing him to sit down. I was kind enough to let him put his back to the tree. I knew that he was having issues with wanting to see everything right now, and I didn't want to make those worse. So I sat down in front of him, grasping his hands in mine, as I gently encouraged him to look at me, and not the wide open spaces behind me.

"What's wrong?" I asked softly, stroking the backs of his hands with my thumbs. When he opened his mouth to protest, I gave him a look. "I'm not stupid, Day. I know that something's wrong. You can tell me."

"I just had a bad experience here, a few decades back," my boyfriend answered slowly, choosing his words carefully. "Ever since, I've taken steps to make sure that the danger didn't come back. But I guess coming back here reopened some old wounds."

"We can leave if you want to," I offered carefully, not wanting to push him. I knew how hard it was for him to open up, even to me. But it was obvious that was an old wound, one that needed handling with care. And I would be as careful as possible. "I can arrange for Elena and Bonnie to get a lift back to Mystic Falls if needed. Hell, Jenna can drive out here, she used to go college here, before she graduated last summer. I don't want you to be here if you don't feel comfortable."

"No, I don't need to leave," Damon shook his head, but he did give me a small smile. And in that smile, I saw his gratitude. "I just want to make sure that this place is safe enough for you, if your sister makes you come here."

"That is a disgustingly distinct possibility," I scrunched up my nose at the thought before shifting so that I was closer to my vampire. "But if you don't feel comfortable with me coming here. Then I won't come here. It isn't that deep to me, I promise. I can always go to a different college if she manages to get me to agree to go. Hell, if she wants me close by, Richmond is not that far way."

"No, it's fine," my boyfriend smiled softly, drawing me in for a kiss. "Being here again, under different circumstances, has helped. And depending on what you decide to do come fall, I will take measures to make this place as safe as possible before then."

"Do I want to know what those measures are?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. At the look on Damon's face, I snorted out a laugh, "Yeah, didn't think so. Just don't do something that will get me into trouble with your brother. Or even worse, my sister." I shuddered dramatically for added effect.

"That's even worse?" Damon looked doubtful and I patted his cheek, giving him a sympathetic look.

"Oh honey, while your brother has perfected the disappointed brooding look, my twin has a more powerful weapon," I paused for dramatic impact. "Those doe eyes of her. When she looks at you with them, all wide eyes and disappointed, if makes the guilt unbearable. And I would know. I grew up with them."

I could tell that he didn't quite believe me still, but my boyfriend nodded slowly, "Well, either way, I'll make sure that neither of our siblings find out anything about my… measures."

"Well, that's a relief," I laughed, shaking my head. I knew that it was bad. That I should care more about what he would do. But the reaction that my vampire had had to this place indicated something a lot worse than he had implied. I had seen how tense he was, how on edge he was. Being back here was not a pleasant experience for him. And if a couple of heads had to roll in order to make him feel safe about coming here, about me coming here, then I would accept that. I just had to trust that the rolling heads were dodgy.

"I live to make your life easy," Damon hummed, tucking my head under his chin as he wrapped his arms around me, fingers sneaking under the hem of my dress to stroke my thigh. "Now, what was that about college?"

"You aren't seriously suggesting that I actually go to college, are you?" I scoffed, rolling my eyes as I tried not to melt in his arms. Honestly, enhanced vampire senses were awesome and all, but dear god, the more sensitive skin made it difficult to focus when your extremely yummy boyfriend was stroking your leg. "You? Of all people?"

"Of course not," my boyfriend jabbed my side, causing me to giggle, as he raised an eyebrow. "But if I ask, then I can't get berated later."

"Ah, a good tactic," I nodded, shifting closer to him, moving my legs over his. "One that I employ often. Normally when it comes to Jeremy."

"But in all seriousness, don't let Elena force you into going to college if you don't want to. Yes, it is an experience. But not one that is right for everyone. Besides, you can always compel yourself into the fraternity and sorority parties if you really want to attend them."

"Is that what you did?"

"Of course."

"Sounds fun," I laughed, shaking my head, my mind working overdrive to find a way to make it work. Because I loved parties. And if I didn't have to attend college to go to them, then I would definitely be even happier. "And Elena wouldn't even suspect anything as I would just say that I was visiting her."

"You have it all planned out," Damon tapped my nose, a pleased smirk on his face as he cupped my face, thumb dragging across my lips. "If you're really lucky, I'll show you all the good party places near Mystic Falls."

"Well, good thing that I'm feeling lucky then."

XXX

We met up with Bonnie and Elena just before Professor Shane's lecture. I was slightly disappointed, as Damon had done his best to tease me, making me want to just rip his clothes off. But unfortunately, we were in public. And public sex was frowned upon.

The other two had spent their time looking around, working out if this place really was a good fit for them after High School ended. It was something that we had to think about now, since graduation really wasn't that far away, not when you thought about it. And you had to start making plans soon. Or, in my case, avoiding plans that your annoying sibling made for you.

Bonnie led the way to the lecture theatre, and we snuck in, finding seats close to the door. I ended up sitting down on Damon's lap, due to the lack of seats. Not that he was complaining. He got me settled before resting his hand on my thigh, thumb sneaking under the hem of my dress to settle on my inner thigh. I knew that he was getting me hot and bothered, and I was trying not to give him the satisfaction of getting to me.

"When I say the word 'witch', what pops into your head?" the professor at the front was saying. He looked quite young, younger than I was expecting. He had the most adorable curly brown hair, like it was legit so cute. Professor Shane looked genuinely interested in what he was teaching, and he was doing his utmost to pass that enthusiasm onto his students. "Halloween costume? Villain of a fairy tale? Maybe an ex-girlfriend?" I coughed my way through a laugh when the room stayed silent. It was a shame, cos Professor Shane looked quite proud of that one. "Well, whatever image it is, it's probably not," he flipped to another slide on his powerpoint, "Tanyell Soso of Montego, Cameroon."

Beside me, my sister leant over and whispered to Bonnie, "Is that him?"

Our witchy friend looked mesmerised, barely taking her eyes off of the man down below, "Yeah."

"He's kind of-"

"Hot," Bonnie immediately finished for her, a satisfied look on her face. I giggled into my hand while my sister smiled and Damon rolled his eyes. I mean, he was kinda hot. Not my type, but if Bonnie wanted to scratch that itch with him, then I was all for it.

"Now, in reality," the professor was saying. "Or in this reality, at least, witches appear to cross every culture in history. They're the architects of the supernatural," we all glanced over at our witch, who shrugged uncomfortably at us, "responsible for everything that goes bump in the night from ghosts to vampires to doppelgangers."

"What is this guy, witchapedia?" my boyfriend rolled his eyes and I snorted, earning myself a dirty look from Bonnie. She shushed us, before turning back to face the cute professor.

"Uh oh, we got in trouble," I whispered to Damon, enjoying his cheeky smirk. I was coping surprisingly being in a room full of people. Especially after yesterday. But I was able to focus on Damon's hand on my skin, on the way that he shifted underneath me, pressing up against me at times. It was definitely enough to distract me from any hungry thoughts.

"Now, if you're a sceptic, you'd call that a coincidence," Professor Shane continued, although I was doing my best to tune him out. "But if you're a true believer, you know that there's really no such thing. It scares the crap out of us."

As I looked around the room, occasionally glancing up at the slideshow to see headshots from supposed witches around the world, a thought it hit me. It was probably a foolish thought, but it was something that had been bothering me ever since I realised just how ravenous my hunger could be. I leant further into Damon, and whispered, "There's not chance of me being a Ripper, is there? I mean, I know that I didn't, you know, rip off any heads last night. But I wasn't exactly in control."

"You aren't a Ripper, Alexa," my boyfriend was quick to reassure me, murmuring into my hair.

"Are you sure?" I frowned, glancing up at him.

"Well, there is only one way to find out," he shrugged, nudging my head back around. "Pick your next meal, baby."

"Okay," I hummed, sounding a bit dubious. But I knew that he was right. I wouldn't be able to work out if my dark fear was true until I fed from someone again. I mean, I probably wasn't a ripper. But I also knew that I wasn't in control last night. And I had to know, sooner rather than later, if I needed to find measures to learn perfect control.

A boy down the front caught my attention, playing on his phone, barely paying attention to the lecture. He tapped his pen against his notepad as he grinned at something on the screen. Damon shook his head, "Stoner guys are no good to grab. They're too paranoid and you don't want the extra buzz."

I frowned, "You can get an extra buzz from stoned people?"

"And drunk people," my boyfriend nodded before directing my gaze along the row of students. "Now, she is a fun size, a tutor. Geeky girls are inherently suspicious of anyone who is nice to them. What you want," he nudged my gaze towards the blonde next to the geeky girl, "is the little blonde, pretty girl. Self-absorbed, easily flattered; you just have to separate her from the pack and make your move."

I was just about to speak when a voice interrupted us. I glanced to the side to see Professor Shane looking at us, eyebrow raised, "Am I interrupting you guys? Or is it maybe the other way around?"

"Oops," I whispered as Damon raised his voice with a smirk, "I was just saying how much I love witches."

"Yeah, you and me both, brother," the professor laughed as I studiously ignored the unimpressed look that my sister was giving me. It was an annoying mixture of disappointed and self-righteous. One that I definitely did not want to look at. "Alright, listen, we should probably talk about the readings that none of you did."

XXX

When the lecture ended, I followed the blonde target from the lecture theatre. Bonnie had stayed behind to speak to Professor Shane and Damon had somehow managed to get Elena to agree to stay with her. I had no idea as to how he had managed that, but either way, I wasn't complaining. It gave me the chance to do what I needed to do without the judgement of my twin. I knew that she knew that I needed to do this, although if she had her way, I would survive just on bloodbags. But I knew that that wasn't possible. And I didn't want to survive like that.

"Oh god, why am I freaking out about this so much?" I muttered, clenching and unclenching my fists as we followed the girl. "I know how to do this."

"After yesterday, its understandable that your confidence is shaken," my boyfriend rubbed my back, giving me an encouraging smile. "Just remember, she's young and healthy. And she'll heal up like a charm. Just keep your eye on the ball."

"She'll heal like a charm," I repeated to myself before taking a deep breath. "I got this. I can do this. Oh fuck, can I do this? No, don't think like that, I can do this." The incident with Heather had really shaken my confidence. I was doing so well before then, but after killing her, I just felt so nervous feeding from someone else. But I couldn't let those nerves take over.

I walked up behind the blonde, who had paused to look at something in her notebook. I cleared my throat, smiling brightly when she turned around, "Heya, you're in Professor Shane's class too, right?"

Blondie smiled back, looking slightly taken aback, "Yeah, I guess so. Why?"

"Well, I got completely distracted, if you know what I mean," I gave her a wink and the girl laughed, nodding. "So I missed the reading list. Don't suppose you can help a girl out and give it to me?"

"Of course," the blonde nodded, looking a lot more relaxed. She pulled out her phone, unlocking it a as she did so. "I know I wrote it down somewhere."

While the girl was distracted, I glanced around, making sure that no one was paying attention. Well, other than Damon. Once I was sure that the coast was clear, I stepped forward and grasped the girl's wrist, drawing her attention. I made eye contact with her, using my compulsion to get her under my control, "Don't scream, don't move. Everything is going to be okay."

"Everything is going to be okay," the girl repeated numbly and I let go of her wrist. But as I did so, I caught sight of her background. It was the blonde, a young girl in her arms. Both of them were smiling widely.

"Oh no," I whispered, immediately regretting my next words. "Who's the kid?"

"My little sister," blondie smiled blissfully and I closed my eyes for a second.

"Motherfucker," I muttered viciously before glancing over my shoulder. Damon must have been listening in as he gave me a stern look before nodding. I knew that he was indicating that I should still do it. Everyone was related to someone. Everyone was loved by someone. I just had to get over that. I didn't know these people, I just had to make it as easy as possible. Even if it felt difficult. "Well, at least you get to go home to her."

I knew that I had to do this. My encounter with Heather last night had proven that I needed to learn control. And I needed to get my confidence back. Even if it meant feeding off this sweet girl with her adorable little sister.

I saw just about to shuffle her to the side, to feed, when a sharp voice called out my name. I glanced to the side to see my sister approaching me, a displeased look on her face. I sighed before muttering, "Uh oh," letting the blonde girl. I caught her gaze again, "Forget that any of this ever happened." Once blondie had nodded her agreement, I turned to face my unhappy sister, "What's up, Ellie?"

"What do you mean, 'what's up'?" Elena snapped, sounding annoyed. Fortunately, that angry gaze was quickly switched to my boyfriend when he joined my side. He rested a hand on my back as he willingly took the brunt of my sister's frustration. "You were going to let her feed on that girl. She's an innocent. And I heard her talking about her family. About her sister.

"So what if she's an innocent?" Damon snapped back, using a mocking tone on the final word. "Alexa wasn't going to hurt her. She would have fed a little bit before compelling the girl to forget everything. Just like nature intended. Because guess what, Elena, everyone is someone's uncle or father or camp counsellor or bible study teacher or sister. People exist, but you don't know them. So why do you care?"

"I care because I won't let you turn my sister into a monster," my twin growled, glaring sharply at my vampire. I just stood there in shock. Was that really what my sister thought? I mean, I knew that she was having trouble with the transition. While I knew that she accepted me, I knew that she had trouble accepting what that meant. And apparently that included some unresolved issues when it came to Damon too.

Luckily, we were saved from a shouting match by the appearance of the amazing Bonnie Bennett. She glanced between my sister and my boyfriend, a frowned on her face, before looking at me. I shrugged helplessly, shaking my head. I didn't really want to put what had just happened into words. I knew that it would come back to haunt me, but for now, I just didn't want to think about that.

"What's going on?" the witch asked, looking at Elena. But it was Damon that answered.

"Nothing," he sneered, still glaring at my twin. "Elena was just educating me on the importance of feelings."

With one final narrowed eyed look, Ellie turned to face our friend, a strained smile on her face as she asked, "Did you talk to the professor?"

"For a second," she nodded, looking pleased. "He found some stuff of my grams in his office and he's gonna dig it up for me." Bon paused for a moment as she pulled a flyer from her bag. "Oh, I saw this."

I accepted the flyer when my friend passed it over. It was for a party at one of the fraternities. Apparently, they were having a murder house party. As you do. But I couldn't complain too much, as it gave me the perfect opportunity to do what I needed to do. A thought that was also shared by Damon.

He smirked down at the flyer before glancing over at me, "Oh, nice, the answer to all of our problems. A frat party: douche central." He rubbed his hands together, looking deliciously evil. "Which is why, you'll be eating very well tonight, Alexa." The other two shared a look of disgust as I laughed. My boyfriend looked pleased as he mused, "So, what should we go as? Victims or killers?"

XXX

Damon had found us the most scandalous clothes possible. I had no idea as to where he had found them, but he had also picked up an old-style suit for himself. In a hilarious tongue in cheek move, my boyfriend had declared that we were going as Jack the Ripper and his victims. The look on Elena's face when he announced that was so funny that I couldn't stop myself from laughing, even if it did get me a dirty look. She was just annoyed that it was a little dig at her boyfriend, the one that she didn't even know if she wanted to date still.

I tugged on the hem of my dress as we walked up to the frat house. Music was already pounding with lights flashing in the windows. And I could hear all the heartbeats of those dancing inside. It was intoxicating. The music, the atmosphere. I could see why college parties were such a draw.

Damon had picked out the most scandalous dress that he could for me. It was a royal blue corset dress, with a layer of black lace on top of it. The blue part of the dress went down to mid-thigh, with the lace hanging an inch below it. While the other two had chosen to cover up with shawls and cardigans, making their black dresses look a bit more appropriate, I had decided to forgo them. This dress made my boobs look amazing and I was going to take full advantage of that. With both the boys inside to feed from and my boyfriend who kept leering at me. I knew why he had chosen this dress and I was going to let him enjoy it.

As we walked through the door, we were met by a kid, dressed a bit too normally for a party like this. But it made sense when he introduced himself, "Hey. I'm Frankie, unassuming serial killer."

He passed out Bloody Marys to us as Damon introduced us, "I'm Jack. And these are the two lovely ladies that I just… rippered."

I barely hid the snigger at the annoyed look on my twin's face. Although I was positive that she had sensed it. I knew that Bonnie had, as she rolled her eyes at me, gently nudging me with her elbow.

"Welcome to the Murder House," Frankie smiled broadly, looking far too happy. "Bloody Marys are free until midnight. Enjoy yourselves."

With one more smile, the dude walked away, ready to party. I couldn't blame him; it did look like a cool party. One that I was itching to enjoy.

"Well, hats off to these idiots," my boyfriend smirked as he glanced around. He took his hat off, tipping it forward slightly before settling it back on his head. He really did look sexy, in his suit, with the hat on. I didn't realise that I had a Victorian era kink, but apparently, Damon dressed like that just did it for me. He glanced up the stairs and raised an eyebrow, "Oh look, Professor Creepy."

Bonnie glared at him before rolling her eyes, "His name is Professor Shane. And he's not creepy."

"You only think that cos you wanna boink him," I sniggered, ignoring the dirty look that I got. My witchy friend must have gotten some kind of signal from hm as she passed her drink to me.

"I'm gonna go talk to him," she declared before pushing her way through the crowd.

"You do that," Damon rolled his eyes as he returned his gaze to the partying college students in front of us.

"Ellie, you should probably go with her," I suggested slyly, gesturing towards her friend. "We don't know this Professor Shane. He could be dodgy. And if Bonnie needs help, then I won't be able to hear over all this music."

My sister didn't look too pleased at the thought of leaving me alone here. But I managed to work my magic and persuaded her that Bonnie needed me more. Of course, I had to promise that I would be fine and that I would stay in control. It was equal parts annoying and adorable, how much she cared about me staying on the rails. But I had to learn and this was my best opportunity to be taken out of my comfort zone. And besides, I knew that Damon would look after me.

Once my sister was gone, I wrapped my arm around Damon's as he led me into the partyzone. He smirked down at me as he whispered in my ear, "Inebriate sleazeballs, all covered in blood. Time to have some fun. Pick anyone that catches your eye."

I grinned up at him before I started scanning the crowd. My vampire was right, this was the perfect place to feed. All of the students were covered in fake blood, which would mask the blood from our bites. It was perfect.

It didn't take me long to find someone. Across the floor, I saw a douchebag slipping something into a distracted girl's drink. I narrowed my eyes at him as he put on a charming smile, trying to encourage the girl to drink the tampered drink.

"Bingo," I muttered, gesturing towards him.

Damon followed my gaze before nodding, "Roofie guy?" I let out an affirmative hum. "Good choice, baby. Go get him."

"Don't need to tell me twice," I smirked up at him before slipping through the crowd. I kept my eyes on my target as I moved. Luckily, he hadn't moved at all. He was too busy leering at the poor girl that he had tried to roofie. Fortunately for her, I showed up before he could do anything else.

I swayed my hips, catching roofie dude's attention as I paused in front of him. I gave him a wink before looking at the girl, "Great party, huh. I might need another drink." I drained the one in my hand before leaning forward to deposit it on a table behind him, giving him a good view of my cleavage.

Once I was positive that I had his attention, I sashayed my way past him, feeling his eyes on me as I left. I was able to hear him give his excuses to the poor girl that he was trying to roofie before following me into one of the empty rooms. I was surprised to find one, but most people were busy grinding away on the dancefloor.

"Still looking for another drink?" roofie dude leered as I leant against the wall, waiting for him to come closer. He didn't need much encouragement as he rested a hand against the wall by my head, looming over me.

I blinked up at him, looking all innocent as I asked, "Yeah, are you offering?" The dude frowned in confusion for a moment before I switched our positions. Pressing him against the wall, I made eye contact, "Don't make a sound and don't move."

Once he was compliant, I let my face change and began to drink. I didn't have any of my hesitation from earlier. I was too caught up in the moment. The thrill of luring him away from the crowds, the manipulation, the small spark of fear in his eyes as he saw my face change. It was intoxicating.

I was barely aware of Damon walking in, closing the door behind him. It wasn't until he spoke that I paid attention, "Remember everything that I've taught you, Ally. You can do this, just… don't kill him."

My hand twitched into a thumbs up before I started tapping on roofie dude's collarbone. I used the rhythm to listen in to his heartbeat, making sure that I didn't go too far. But I still wanted to drink my fill. I didn't want to have to feed from several different people each time. I just had to convince myself that I was full.

So I kept going a little bit longer than I would have before. But I made sure to listen to the heart. And the moment I heard it start to get slightly weaker, I pulled away. Blood dripped from my lips, falling onto my boobs. I knew that I looked monstrous, but I didn't care. I gripped roofie dude's chin, forcing him to meet my gaze, "Forget this ever happened and get out of here. Oh, and if you ever even think about roofying anyone again, you will never be able to get a boner." I smirked and pressed a kiss to his cheek, "Have a shitty life, dickhead."

I turned around to watch him leave before making eye contact with Damon. He looked impressed, and I felt a thrill go through my body as he glanced me up and down, eyes lingering on my blood-stained cleavage, "You did good baby."

"I feel good too," I laughed, licking my lips. I stepped forward into my boyfriend's arms and whispered in his ear, "Let's go party."

XXX

Damon's idea of partying was a lot different to mine. But I was not going to complain. Before I could get anywhere near the door, he tugged me back, pushing me up against the wall. And the next thing that I knew, his lips were covering mine. One hand rested on my ass, squeezing hard, while the other tangled in my hair, tilting my head back.

I was more than happy to let him devour me, licking into my mouth. I wrapped a leg around his hips, pulling him even closer to me. My fingers tangled in his hair, pushing the hat from his head. Damon growled against my lips before moving to my neck, licking away any blood that he encountered. I gasped as he nipped at the sensitive skin of my neck, sucking on that sweet spot under my neck.

I could feel his erection against my thigh, as his fingers gently stroked down my body. I shivered in anticipation as they got closer to my core. But just as they slipped under the edge of my panties, they were gone. And I was being sped over to the table in the room. Damon sat me down on it before he was licking at my cleavage. He sucked away the blood, fingers dipping under the fabric of my dress to knead my sensitive flesh.

I felt something scrap against my skin and I nodded, pressing Damon's face closer to my boob. He didn't any further encouragement to sink his fangs into my flesh, hands squeezing my hips as he drank. I moaned loudly at the sensation. Everything felt heightened, including the feeling of being drank from. I could feel my own face change at the feeling of it.

Once Damon had drank his feel, his lightly kissed the already healing skin before smirking up at me. His lips were stained a bright red and my undead heart skipped a beat. I grabbed his waistcoat and pulled his close, covering his lips with mine. I tasted my own blood and growled, "You are such a fucking tease."

"You haven't seen anything yet, baby," he smirked, nipping at my lip before pulling away. He didn't go, no, instead, he sank to his knees. Strong hands pulled my ass to the edge of the table and I could feel Damon's breath against my core, through my soaked panties. I bit my lip to hide a gasp, but from the smirk that I could feel, I hadn't done a very good job of hiding it.

Fingers hooked into the edge of my panties, slowly sliding them down my legs. I trembled in anticipation as kissed followed my panties, going down my leg until the thin fabric disappeared. I was barely aware of where they had gone before I felt Damon's breath against my soaked core. He pressed the lightest of kisses to my lower lips, as his fingers held my legs open.

"Day, stop teasing!" I groaned, as he continued to press kisses to everywhere except where I wanted him.

"As you wish," my boyfriend purred before diving in. He sucked hard on my clit before flicking it with his tongue. I collapsed back against the table, gripping the edges of the wood tightly. Probably too tight, as I heard it cracking. But the magic of Damon's tongue made it impossible to pay attention to how much strength I was using. He sucked and flicked my clit, occasionally dipping down to thrust his tongue into my entrance. It wasn't until I heard the wood break completely that my boyfriend took pity on me. His fingers slowly entered me, crooking just right to rub against that spot. While they did that, his tongue never let up its attention on my clit.

I was a panting, writhing mess on the table, unable to do more than moan and whimper. Damon had thoroughly succeeded in breaking me. Not that I was complaining. The pleasure building in my stomach had my legs tensing. I reached down to gip his hair, pressing his face against me as I searched for that little something to take me over the edge. That perfect thing to combine with the movements of his tongue, the way that his fingers pressed against me. And Damon was not one to disappoint.

He replaced his tongue with his thumb before I felt his fangs against my thigh. The sharp pain and feeling of being drank from was enough to send me tumbling. I was just lucky that the music pounding outside the room was enough to hide my moans and cries. I had barely recovered, so caught up in the post orgasmic bliss, that I wasn't aware of Damon moving until I felt something else pressing against my entrance.

I pushed myself up, wrapping my legs around Damon's hips as he slowly eased inside of me. The pleasure, which was still sharp, started to build again with each hard thrust of Damon's hips. His face was buried in the crook of my neck as he held me against him with one hand, the other gripping the table behind me. I just wrapped myself around him and enjoyed the ride, my orgasm rapidly building again.

Damon's hips began to stutter as he reached his orgasm. I was so close to mine, and I knew exactly what I wanted this time. With a shaking hand, I pushed aside the collar of his shirt. My face changed and I sank my fangs into his skin, groaning as his sweet blood filled my mouth. I drank deeply as Damon did the same, biting into my neck. I quickly fell over the edge again, drinking my way through the orgasm.

My face hadn't changed back when I pulled away, making eye contact with my boyfriend. Damon looked immensely satisfied as my blood dripped from his lips. His eyes darkened at the sight of his blood around my mouth, "I've been waiting to do that for far too long."

"I know," I purred, running my finger across my lips before licking the blood from it. "And it was definitely worth it."

XXX

We returned to the party, my panties still in Damon's pocket. But the thrill of it had my undead heart racing, excitement pumping through my veins. I was still coming down from the pleasure of what happened, and I was about to get a new high all together. Damon had mentioned previously that drunk people gave you an extra buzz. And he was right.

I had taken my fill from several of the girls in the room, and I could taste the booze in their blood. It gave it an extra zing. And I loved it. I danced with each girl, enjoying the blissful look in their eyes before I compelled them. I made sure that it didn't hurt. I didn't want to ruin their night. But I realised that this was definitely my scene. And even if I didn't go to college, I was still going to enjoy going to college parties.

Damon had left me to go have his own feast. But I saw him out of the corner of my eye. He never went far, always staying close enough to intervene if I lost control. But for once, probably for the first time since I turned, I felt in complete control. Like I knew what I was doing. Like I was confident in what I was doing.

After I drank from my latest girl, I twirled her away, content to continue dancing. I had consumed far too much blood, and my hunger was finally completely satisfied. But that didn't stop me from taking more every now and then. It was more for pleasure than anything else. But I just couldn't stop myself. I was feeling completely confident and I was enjoying it.

Through the crowd, I saw Damon finish drinking from his girl. He caught my gaze and I saw his eyes gleam. I knew that I was covered in blood. It had dripped down my mouth, creating random patterns on my cleavage. But I didn't care. I especially didn't care when I saw the lustful look in my boyfriend's eyes. Despite being fucked not that long ago, I could feel my body tingly again, wanting more.

And that feeling grew as Damon approached me through the crowd. He only had eyes for me and I couldn't stop myself from winking at him. Moving faster than he should have, my boyfriend was suddenly in front of me, his hands on my hips. I laughed and wrapped my arms around his neck, leaning forward to lick at the blood on his chin. I followed it up to his lips, sucking on the bottom one. I couldn't stop myself from groaning at the taste of blood. I felt Damon smirk against my lips as he opened his mouth, allowing me to lick inside, the combination of the blood and his natural taste causing my head to spin.

Damon's hands on my hips had me swaying to the music, even as I devoured his mouth. His fingers dug into my ass as he hips ground against mine. I could feel his erection again, and I felt a flash of satisfaction that I was affecting him as much as he was affecting me. He growled into my mouth as I nipped his lip, smirking up at him as he raised an eyebrow. In retaliation, he found that sensitive spot on my neck, sinking his fangs into it. I let out a moan, fingers threading through his hair, keeping his mouth pressed against my neck.

Once he had drank enough to get my body hot, he pulled back, a satisfied look on his lips, lips that were stained ruby red with my blood. I went to lean back in for a kiss when a sharp pain pierced my head. I let out a hiss, a hand coming up to rest on the side of my head. I had no idea where that had come from, but I was quickly distracted from the pain by a very unimpressed face.

Elena was staring at me through the crowd, look of disappointment and shock on her face. Bonnie was stood behind her, looking just as shocked. I winced and glanced up at Damon, "On a scale of one to ten, how fucked am I?"

Damon glanced over at my sister before rolling his eyes. He cupped my face, thumb resting on my lips, "Do not let Elena get into your head over this. She doesn't understand and she never will."

"I know," I groaned lightly, studiously ignoring my sister's stare. "I won't let her guilt me over this. It's just very annoying. I didn't even want her to come, but since she did, she's now judging me over it. She should have known what would happen, and it wasn't like I lost control. She just let Stefan get into her head about this." I rolled my eyes, "Her getting advice from a blood addict was always going to come back and bite me in the ass."

My boyfriend had a considering look on his face before he shrugged. The next thing that I knew, his lips were on mine, his tongue licking into my mouth. One hand gripped my ass while the other kept my head tilted up. I just clung onto his strong shoulders, too distracted by the thigh rubbing against my crotch to realise what was happening.

"There," he whispered against my lips, sounding far too satisfied. "Now she'll be too distracted to yell at you for a little while."

"That's the hope," I snorted in amusement, rolling my eyes before glancing back towards the entrance. "Ah well, best face the music."

With a reluctant sigh, I took Damon's hand in mine, leading him towards the entrance. My buzz wasn't completely gone, but it had faded enough that I was able to leave the party with minimal regret. My only regret was that I didn't have an excuse to escape the scolding that was bound to happen. Because as much as I loved my sister, I knew that she was no happy with what she just saw.

XXX

I walked out of the frat house, the cool air feeling surprisingly nice against my heated skin. That was one thing that I loved about being a vampire, I didn't get cold anymore. And it was fucking amazing. I had always hated being cold and now I would never be cold again. I focused on those thoughts, rather than thinking about what would come. I knew that it wouldn't be pretty. But this had been building up all day. This was just the breaking point of it all.

I knew that Elena and Bonnie were following me across the lawn. I was surprised that my sister had remained quiet for this long. She didn't normally take this long to berate someone. And just as I was thinking that, she called out my name, "Alexa! What was that? I can't believe that you were acting like that! I don't even know who you are anymore!"

"Oh lord, talk about dramatic," I muttered and rolled my eyes before turning around with a raised eyebrow. "Of course you know who I am. The problem is that you built up this image of me being like Saint Stefan. Well, the Stefan on the animal diet Stefan, not his darker side who rips people's heads off for shits and giggles. But not all vampires are like that, Elena, you know that. How many other vampires do you know actually survive on the bunny diet and don't go off the rails? None, that's how many! I'm embracing this in a way that your boyfriend never can. And I refuse to feel guilty about that! Did you shame Caroline like this when she turned? No, you were supportive, you liked the fact that she was miserable about turning. Well, I'm not going to be miserable. So suck on that."

"I should never have let you listen to Damon," my twin shook her head, ignoring everything that I just said. "He makes everything sound like a good idea, even when it isn't. Especially when it isn't. That's how he manipulates people. And you fell for it."

Oh wow, what a way to take a pot-shot at my boyfriend. I knew why she didn't want to listen to my words. She hated how truthful they were. How they highlighted her hypocrisy. She loved Stefan when he was on the animal diet. And she never recovered from him going off the rails and eating people. Her viewpoint of him would forever be changed and that was why that relationship was not healthy. Neither of them accepted his true side. And that was dangerous. For all parties.

"Well, that's a bit rude," Damon shook his head, sounding as unimpressed as I did. "Come on, let's hit the road. Not like the car journey will get any less awkward."

"Is there any way that we can compel a taxi driver to take them home so that I don't have to deal with their judgement?" I asked quietly, wincing when Elena narrowed her eyes at me. "If you love me then you'd do it."

"Sorry baby," my boyfriend sighed, although I did see a smirk playing around his lips. "It's not worth Jenna's wrath."

"Ah fuck, you're right," I sighed, shaking my head.

It was then that I realised that my sister had been speaking to me, well, berating would be a more accurate term, "Alexa! Are you even listening to me?"

"Uh, no?" I winced at the dirty look that I got.

Luckily, before she could bite my head off, Bonnie spoke up. What wasn't lucky was her words. She narrowed her eyes at Damon before snapping, "You were supposed to help her and you let her get completely out of control."

It was Damon's turn to roll his eyes, "She wasn't out of control. Alexa was having fun. Now, I know that that is a foreign concept to you, but believe me when I say that it is possible."

"This isn't fun!" the witch shook her head in disagreement. "She's acting like a different person."

My boyfriend narrowed his eyes, glancing between the two in front of us, "She is a different person. She's a vampire. We're a predatory species. We enjoy the hunt, the feed, and the kill. When the guilt gets too bad, we switch off our humanity and we revel in it."

"That's what you want, isn't it?" Elena glared at him and I just glanced around, wondering if I could just leave and not be noticed. Because I didn't want to think about their words. About the looks that they were giving me. It kinda hurt. And after feeling so good, I didn't want to deal with that. "For her to be like you."

"She already is like me," Damon snapped, a hand resting on my back, giving me strength, fingers gently stroking the bare skin. "And you know what makes me able to drink my fill and leave someone breathing and not rip their head off like my brother? It's that I can revel in it. I can make it fun." My boyfriend carefully turned me around before glancing over his shoulder at the other two girls. "If you really cared for Alexa, then you would accept her for who she is now. And not judge her for having a bit of fun."

With those parting words, Damon led me away from them, in the direction of his car. Despite the muttering that I could hear behind me, I didn't glance at them. I knew that they needed to hear his words. Because it was true. They didn't accept my new state. I always knew that Bonnie would have a harder time of it, considering how anti-vampire witches were. But I thought that my twin would accept me as I was now. But apparently that was a foolish hope. And now I had to face the fact that our relationship would forever be changed. All because I had completely the transition to save my life and I had decided to embrace that new opportunity.

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My newfound confidence had led to me asking Damon to drop me off at home. Elena had gone home with Bonnie, probably to discuss how off the rails I was. It wouldn't surprise me if they invited Stefan over to join in too, since I knew that he had encouraged those thoughts before we left for Whitmore. But even though it, I was relieved that she wasn't there.

Damon had promised to come around later, once I had had the chance to speak to my aunt. I also secretly suspected that he wanted to get an updated from his brother about the hunter problem before he started to relax for the night. I knew that whatever the update was, it wouldn't be good news. But that would be a problem for later, right now, I had one of my own to deal with.

I took a deep breath before knocking on the front door. I couldn't even remember the last time that I needed to be let into my own home like this. But it was just another sign that my life had changed forever. But hopefully this change wouldn't be too bad.

When Jenna opened the door, I gave her a small smile, "Hey Auntie J, how are you doing?"

"Alexa," Jenna smiled back, stepping out to pull me into a hug. I was just relieved that I had changed out of the sexy dress and had gotten rid of the blood before I came home. I didn't want my aunt to see that. Especially since I could see how tired she was and I could smell vomit on her breath, even though she had tried to hide it. "I didn't think that you would come home. Where's Elena?"

"Sleepover at Bonnie's," I shrugged, not wanting to get into the detail of what happened. "I, uh, I know that it has been a while, and you can totally say no if you don't feel comfortable with it, but I finally feel ready to be invited in."

"Alexa," my aunt smiled softly, resting a hand on my cheek. "This is your home. You'll always be welcome here."

My own smiled turned wobbly, and I could feel my eyes burning with tears at her kind words. I hadn't spent enough time with Jenna recently to know how she felt about my transition. I guess I was too scared that she would reject me. And she was someone that I could not handle rejection from. I sniffed and rubbed my eyes, "Jenna, stop, you're gonna make me cry."

"You won't be the only one," Jenna cleared her throat, blinking back tears too. "Alexa, you can come in."

And for the first time in weeks, I stepped over the threshold to my childhood home. It felt weird, being in here like this. I had changed but the home had not. I honestly didn't know if I still fit in here, but I also craved the comfort that it brought. I had lived here since I was born. This house used to be the only home that I knew, until Damon and the Salvatore Boarding House came along. And no matter what, it would always be home, even if I did outgrow it.

I slipped off my shoes as I stood in the hallway, just glancing around. I cleared my throat before murmuring, "I honestly expected it to feel different."

"I know," my aunt sympathised, a hand gently stroking my arm. "And it'll probably feel that way for a while."

I nodded, about to answer when I heard footsteps coming down the stairs. I glanced to the side to see my brother making his entrance. He paused on the bottom step, a wide smile forming on his face before he approached me. He gathered me up into a hug as he laughed, "Lexa! You're finally back inside!"

"I finally feel ready," I laughed back, giving him a gentle squeeze before pressing a kiss to his cheek. I wasn't going to lie and say that it was incredibly easy being in here with them. I could still feel the blood gushing beneath their skin, I could still feel their heartbeats, tempting me. But I was able to ignore that. Even with my brother in my arms, I was able to ignore that.

"Today at Whitmore helped then?" Jer asked as we all gathered in the kitchen. I made a coffee for myself, craving the comfort that the familiar drink would bring. I did hot chocolates for the other two, not wanting to give them coffee at this time for night.

"Despite what Elena might say, yeah it did," I rolled my eyes before sighing. "She is having some… adjustment issues. So she might describe today a little differently to me. Just promise me that you won't judge me for what you hear?"

"Hey," Jenna's warm hand covered mine as she gave me a gentle smile. "We all knew that there would be some teething problems. All I want is for you to do this in a way that is best for you."

"Even if it isn't picture perfect and rosy?" I frowned, glancing between my aunt and brother.

"Even then," Jenna confirmed while Jer wrapped an arm around my shoulders. "Elena knows that too; she just worries about you. She just wants you to be okay."

"You didn't see the way that she looked at me today," I grumbled miserably, tapping my nails against the mug in my hands. "It was horrible. And I just… I don't know how to get her to see that I'm still me. All she sees is a monster. And it doesn't help that Stefan is getting in her head, telling that Damon will get me in trouble. Oh, they'll deny it, but I know that they worry about that."

"Stefan's just projecting his own issues onto you," my clever aunt sighed, glancing to the side, where there was a picture of her and Ric. "And I know that what happened to Ric worries him too. But just show them that you're okay."

"You really think that it's that easy?" I raised an eyebrow, feeling a bit dubious. But Jenna was quick to reassure me. I just hoped that she was right.

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A/N: I hope you all enjoyed :) thank you for the reviews, please keep them coming! They really do help when I'm going through a writer's block period :( season 4 is not playing nice when it comes to writing! Friendly reminder of the poll, please keep voting because I do not know who Elena should end up with haha until next time xoxo