Disclaimer: I only own my OCs

A/N: I managed to write this one a lot quicker than I expected, which is always a nice feeling! I'm hoping to get season 4 written before the end of the year, but we'll have to see if I manage it! This chapter has a lot of character interactions, and quite a big moment! I hope that I kept everyone in character, and again, I promise I do love Stefan!

XXX

We returned home late evening.

The Salvatore Boarding House was quiet. Only a few lamps illuminated the large building. The fire crackled in the library, but there was no one around. I was surprised that Stefan wasn't immediately appearing to berate and chastise me. But I wasn't going to complain that he wasn't around. I wasn't his biggest fan right now, just as he probably wasn't mine.

I poured a glass of whiskey from the booze table before taking a seat on the leather sofa. I stretched out my legs, resting them on the coffee table while Damon disappeared from the room. He was either searching for the other occupant of the house or making sure that none of his stuff had been messed up. I just sat there, staring into the fire, until he returned.

My phone buzzed in my pocket, probably the usual reminder from Jeremy that our aunt was close to giving birth. But I ignored it. Later, I would tell them that I was back in town. But for now, I just wanted to enjoy the last of my peace. Before everyone started to hound me again about turning my humanity back on. Before they told me off for turning April, for feeding on humans, for daring to be rude. There was a long list and I was not in the mood to deal with any of it. So I would hide my return. Especially since it appeared as though Stefan was not around to blab on me.

I glanced up when a strong hand settled on my shoulder. Damon looked down at me, the light from the fire highlighting those damn fine cheekbones, before he plucked my drink from my hand. He downed it in one before giving my shoulder a squeeze and moving to refill it. I rolled my eyes when I accepted the refilled drink, "You know, you could have just gotten your own."

"I know," my boyfriend gave me a wink before sitting next to me. He wrapped an arm around my shoulder, pulling me into his side. I tucked my legs over his, resting the glass on my knee. Damon's fingers lightly stroked my lower back as we stared into the fire. There was something soothing about being back in the Boarding House, even if I had thoroughly enjoyed my time away from home. I was right before. If we had stayed away from Mystic Falls for longer, then I might have been tempted to turn it back on sooner. It was hard to tell. But my obligations in this cursed little town meant that I would never find out.

"I'm guessing that Stefan isn't lurking around," I eventually murmured, shifting slightly when Damon's other hand settled on my knee. We slowly sipped at the glass in my hand, drinking more for the warmth of the drink than any other reason. It was habit, sharing a glass in the library at the end of the day. And it was one that we apparently returned to, even with my humanity missing.

"He's probably in town, helping Caroline with April. Or he is with Jenna and the others. From the bitchy little message that he left me a couple of weeks ago, he doesn't really spend much time here unless he is with someone."

"Well, I guess that means that we won't be bothered for a while," I shrugged, my nails tapping against the glass. "You get to wait a bit longer before he can tell you off for taking me out of town."

"Oh joy," my boyfriend rolled his eyes before gently removing the empty glass from my hand. He reached back to place it on the booze table behind us, before resting his hand on my thigh. His nails drew patterns on the skin above my knee while the arm that he had wrapped around me tugged me closer to him. I just knew that all those little insecurities, courtesy of Stefan, were returning to his mind. And I would do what I would to ease those concerns. Even with my humanity off, I didn't like to see Damon like that. He was mine and no one hurt what was mine.

I slowly moved so that I was straddling his lap, forcing Damon to meet my gaze. I cupped his face, my thumbs brushing those delectable cheekbones, before leaning forward to nuzzle his nose. Damon's hands gripped my hips, holding me close as I whispered against his lips, "If you want, I can rip his tongue out. That will stop him from berating you over something that he has no right to talk about."

"It's a tempting thought," my boyfriend's lips quirked up into a smirk as I brushed my lips against them. "But maybe save it for a later time."

"Hmm, spoilsport," I breathed out before sucking his lower lip into my mouth. I gave it a soft bite, swiping my tongue against it before Damon quickly took control of the kiss. I didn't mind giving him the power. I knew that he needed it, that it would help him feel settled before he had to deal with the rest of the group.

I ground my hips down against his, feeling as his body already began to stand to attention. His cock strained against the confines of his jeans as I continued to rub my hips against his. I could feel my body growing warm, aching for more, as Damon used his grip on my hips to control my movements. The denim of his jeans provided some friction, but not enough.

"Come on, baby," I moaned softly against my boyfriend's lips as he panted into my mouth. "Fuck me right here, where we spend so much time. Mark this room with us. Give us something to think about every time we are in here."

"Fucking tease," Damon groaned, lifting me up so that I could undo his belt and jeans. He shoved them down slightly so that I could free his cock from his boxers. I gripped it tight, pumping my hand up and down, rubbing my thumb against the slit. My boyfriend muttered out my name, cursing, as he pushed the thin fabric of my panties out of the way. I lined his cock up to my entrance before Damon slowly lowered me down. I let out a loud groan as he entered me, gripping onto Damon's arms as I tilted my head back. He kept my movement slow, every inch of his slowly dragging against my walls, before I was fully impaled.

My boyfriend tugged me forward, so that my chest was pressed against his, my arms wrapped around his neck, before he slowly lifted me up again. This new angle had me moaning into his neck as he found that spot that made me see stars. Every moment had his cock pressing against it, a constant and firm pressure that turned my legs to jelly.

I panted into Damon's neck as he tightened his grip on my thighs, bouncing me up and down on his cock, repeatedly hitting that magical spot. I clung onto him, my face changing as I felt my orgasm rapidly approaching. As my fangs scrapped against his skin, he pulled down on his cock harder than before. Both of us groaned at the feeling before Damon tilted his head back, giving me full access to his neck. I sank my fangs into his skin, warm, sweet blood filling my mouth, just as he thrusted against that spot again. My body shook as I came, greedily gulping down my boyfriend's blood.

It didn't take long for Damon to follow me over the edge into pleasurable oblivion, an iron grip on my thighs as he held me close to him. I licked away the blood that dripped down his skin before titling my head back, admiring the look on his face. His whole face relaxed, before he looked down at me, pressing a kiss to my forehead, murmuring against my skin, "That was one way to settle back in at home."

XXX

I woke up the next morning to the high voice of April Young yelling at Damon, "She turned me into a vampire before abandoning me!"

"Oh please," my boyfriend brushed off her words while I rolled my eyes. "She left you with people who can teach you how to survive as a vampire. It wasn't like she left you with no one."

"She still should have been here, Damon," and that was Stefan. It didn't surprise me that he was also here. I assumed that Damon had told the others that we were back in town. And the moment that that happened, the younger Salvatore would have been sped over here. Apparently, with April in tow. "It was her responsibility to teach April."

I pushed myself out of bed, slipping on some panties before grabbing one of Damon's nearby t-shirts. I knew that I had to go save my boyfriend from them, before they started blaming him for everything. I didn't bother putting anything else on. If they were going to interrupt my morning and delay my coffee, then they would just have to deal with it.

I reached the bottom of the stairs just as Damon scoffed, "You should be lucky that I took her out of town, Stefan, because she was close to beating you to death with your own spine."

"He's right, you know," I pointed out with a shrug as I entered the library. The occupants of the room glanced over at me as I walked over to my boyfriend. "I did come very close to just killing you to shut you up. Apparently, things haven't changed in that respect."

Stefan gave me an unimpressed look, making sure to keep his gaze firmly on my face, while April narrowed her eyes at me. Her hands clenched into fists and I couldn't help but notice a daylight ring gleaming on her pale hand. Huh, so Bonnie found it in herself to control her magic long enough to make the kid one. Well, at least she couldn't completely say that I had ruined her life.

Damon passed me my coffee just as April shouted, "You left me!"

"You're lucky that I didn't just kill you," I rolled my eyes at the girl, raising an eyebrow as her face changed. Ah, so she hadn't learnt complete control then. Despite being taught by the perfect Caroline Forbes and Mr Stefan Control Salvatore. "Because that was my second plan. This just kept everyone off my back long enough to leave."

"But why?" the kid's voice cracked, her lip trembling as her anger turned into frustration. A part of me wondered what the other two had been teaching her. And if it had actually helped her. I knew that Damon teaching me had shaped how I adapted to being a vampire. It was probably why I loved it so much, even if I was forced to turn before I was ready. "Why would you do this to me, just to leave me behind?" I didn't know if April was more affected by the fact that I had left her behind for several weeks, than the fact that I had actually turned her. I was sure that that couldn't be true. But from the way she was speaking, maybe it was. Especially when she whispered, "You promised me that you would never leave me like that. That you'll never leave me alone."

"Well, you weren't alone," I gestured at the younger Salvatore. "You had Stefan and Caroline, and the others. Trust me, even if I had stayed in town, they would not have let me teach you. Because I would have made sure that you enjoyed being a vampire, which means feeding on people. I'm sure that the killjoy over there has you on the bunny diet."

"He tried, but I couldn't stick with it," the girl mumbled, glancing guiltily at Stefan. "So Rebekah helped me to learn to feed from people."

"Thank god for Rebekah," I rolled my eye, exchanging a glance with Damon. "At least she didn't ruin your undead life before it even started. Now, are you going to continue yelling at me or can I enjoy my coffee now?"

"You really don't care, do you?" April whispered, staring at me with her big blue eyes. And that was part of the reason why I turned the kid. If she looked at you like that, then you would literally fall over yourself to fix whatever issue she had. Unless your humanity was gone. Then you really wouldn't care if those eyes filled with tears.

"Nope," I shrugged, moving to sit on the couch, crossing my legs. I knew that I was revealing an indecent amount of thigh. It had me smirking into my coffee, especially when Stefan cleared his throat and looked away from me. Damon moved to stand behind me, a hand rested on my shoulder as he gave his brother a look. I got the feeling that they hadn't had the chance to properly discuss everything, since April had tagged along with Stefan. But it wouldn't be long until they did, and it definitely wouldn't be a quiet discussion.

When the girl just continued to stare at me with disbelieving eyes, Stefan sighed. He placed a hand on her shoulder before directing her out of the room. As they left, I heard him say, "Come on, April, Caroline will be here soon and then you can go practice feeding with her."

"Well, that was interesting," I snorted, finishing my coffee and shaking my head. I heard my boyfriend huff out a laugh behind me before he appeared at my side. He sat down next to me, giving my bare legs a pointed look. And I rolled my eyes, "Oh relax, put that jealousy away. I'll go get changed in a few. I just knew that Stefan would get so uncomfortable that he wouldn't hang around if I was dressed like this."

"Still, I don't like other people, especially my brother, seeing what is mine."

XXX

I was back in the library, this time dressed in shorts and a tank top, when Caroline arrived. She stormed into the Boarding House, her heels clicking against the floor as she demanded, "Where is she? I wanna see her."

I was surprised that she hadn't already found me, considering I wasn't exactly hiding from her. But that surprised quickly disappeared when I heard Stefan's voice, "I wouldn't really recommend that, Caroline. She hasn't changed during her time away and I don't know if she will try to hurt you again."

The blonde paused, taking a deep breath before sighing, "I don't care, Stefan. She's still my friend, even if she is being a raging bitch right now. I have to try. I owe her that, I owe our friendship that."

The older vampire was silent for a moment before slowly nodding, "Just be careful. I haven't had the chance to weaken her, so just keep an eye on her."

"She won't try to kill me," Caroline said confidently, the sound of her heels growing louder as she walked in my direction, presumably directed by Stefan. The confidence in her voice almost made me want to try to kill her. But with Damon elsewhere in the house, I wouldn't put it past Stefan to use his absence to try and lock me up somewhere. So I would play nice, for now.

I glanced up from my seat on the chair closest to the fire. My legs were stretched out in front of me, my bare feet resting on the coffee table. I had been spending my time flicking through some of the numerous novels in the library. None had caught my attention, but it was a slightly less boring way of killing time. Especially since my boyfriend was preoccupied.

The blonde held out a takeaway coffee cup, a hesitant smile on her face, "I drove past it on my way over here and I know that you love their coffee." I stared at her for a moment before beckoning her forward. The other vampire did so slowly, handing me the drink before settling in the middle of the sofa, just out of arm's reach. "For the record, I'm glad that you're back."

"Why?" I scoffed, taking a cautious sniff at the coffee. "So you can force me to turn my humanity back on."

"It doesn't have any vervain in it," Caroline quickly spoke up, holding her hands up. "I do agree that you need to turn your humanity back on. But I guess I understand why you haven't yet. You lost Elena. We should have known that you wouldn't cope with that well. It just isn't who you are. I guess we're just lucky that you've been fixated on bringing her back and not destroying this town."

"I was tempted to do both," I smirked sharply, giving the other girl a wink. Caroline winced at my words but didn't say anything. It was an impressive level of self-control from her. I didn't know what had caused it, but it made me determined to break it. "But luckily for you all, I still had people living her. And Elena would need somewhere to live once she was back in the land of the living."

"Do you really think that you can bring her back?" the blonde asked, her voice low as she leant forward, resting her arms on her knees. "I know that you've been obsessing over it, but is it really possible?"

"Oh honey, do you really think that I will take no for an answer right now?" I purred, showing a hint of fang. "I've got plans that you won't even imagine. So yes, I can bring her back."

"A part of me hopes that you do," Caroline admitted softly, placing her empty cup on the table. She clasped her hands together, shaking her head, blonde hair bouncing softly. "But then I see what this has done to you and I don't know if it would be kinder for you to stop."

"It wouldn't be," I shrugged, resting back in my seat, resting on thigh on the arm of the chair. I sipped at the coffee as I stared at the other vampire. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat under my gaze, looking anywhere but me. "Is that what you all believe? That the world would be a better place, that I would be in a better place, if I stopped trying to bring my sister back to life? I mean, I knew that you could be foolish. But to be downright stupid? Nah, I never thought that any of you could be capable of that."

"We're just worried about you, Alexa. You've done so many horrible things since you turned it off, things that just aren't you. And we're worried that you won't want to turn it back on, even if you do bring Elena back."

"Maybe you just don't know what I'm truly capable of," I murmured before narrowing my eyes, a sharp edge to my smile. "Tell me, did Tyler come to see you too? Or did he save a dance just for me?"

"Tyler came to see you?" Caroline blinked in shock, sitting up straight to stare at me. My words had achieved what I wanted. The blonde didn't seem interested in talking about me anymore. Which was a safe thing for her, because it was not a topic that I was keen to continue.

"Yep, at prom," I placed my empty cup to the side before leaning forward. "Aw, did he not tell you? He came to see me, outside your little tent, and we shared a dance. Did he go looking for you after? Or was he too annoyed that you didn't leave town with him? Choosing nonsense like graduation and prom over him, the man that you supposedly loved." I whistled, shaking my head. "It must have broken his poor little heart."

"I don't know what you're talking about," the blonde snapped, curling her hands into fists as my words prodded at wounds that she had tried to ignore. "I stayed for my mom."

"Oh, your mom," I repeated slowly, nodding dramatically. "That makes total sense. I mean, you'll definitely be able to stay in town for your mom. Oh, wait, no you won't. Because in a few short years, you'll have to leave town, because people will start to notice that you aren't aging. So saying that you are staying for your mom? Damn, that must burn Tyler even more."

"Why are you saying this?" Caroline whispered, her hands shaking as she tried to push away the feelings, the hurt, caused by my words.

"Because it doesn't feel very nice when people try to use your loved ones against you," I narrowed my eyes. "So tell Stefan that if he tries to use Damon against me again, if he tries to get into my boyfriend's head again, then I will do a lot worse than turning April Young into a vampire."

XXX

"Alexa?" I smirked at the surprise in Bonnie's voice. Of course, I was surprised that the witch had even answered my call, but I wasn't going to complain.

"Surprise," I purred, curling my legs under me. I was still the only one in the library, but I could hear Caroline moaning at Matt from the parlour. He had turned up not long after the blonde had stormed out, spitting my name like a curse. She had snapped at Stefan to do whatever was needed to get my humanity back. Of course, Damon chose that moment to appear, warning the two with strong words not to interfere. After checking in on me, Damon disappeared to have words with his brother. "So, a little birdie tells me that you have agreed to lower the veil for Silas."

"Who told you that?" the girl frowned sounding as though she was moving from her previous location. I tried to listen in, to see who she was meeting, but there were no clues. It probably wasn't important, but any information that I could hold over the witch would benefit me. Especially if she decided to back out again.

"I eavesdropped," I shrugged, tapping my nails against the glass in my hand. "Stefan isn't very good at telling when I am listening in to his conversations. After that, it was just a case of manipulating April into telling me what had been going on."

Not that it took a lot of manipulating. In fact, it was incredibly easy. Despite her anger at me for turning her and then abandoning her, April was still desperate for my approval. She remembered how I had compelled away memories of Connor's attack. She remembered that I hadn't compelled her since then. It was weird, having the girl so desperate for my attention. But I didn't mind when I was able to find out everything that had been happening in my absence. Including what was happening with Silas and Bonnie.

The mention of the newest vampire in the Mystic Falls gang must have ignited the witch's previous fury over it as she hissed, "What you did to that girl was wrong."

"Perhaps. Only time will tell. Besides, it wasn't like I made her life any worse. She was living with an aunt who didn't really care about her, she lived in fear of the supernatural. I just gave her the tools to be strong."

"You killed her."

"She came back," I rolled my eyes, swirling my drink in my hand. "Speaking of coming back, your best bud Silas told me that when you lower the veil, Elena will only be alive in the expression triangle. He has offered me a deal to make sure that she stays alive permanently. But if you can offer me something better, than I'll stick with you. After all, sisters before misters, amiright?"

"When did you speak to Silas?" Bonnie's voice was filled with suspicion. I could understand why. From what I had heard, she had taken to avoiding the immortal being. I wasn't quite sure why, probably because she was planning on betraying him or something like that. Of course, if she did, then it wouldn't end well for me. So I made a note to talk her out of any naughtiness like that when I next saw her. If I was going to break my deal with Silas, I was going to do it on my terms. I wasn't going to let Bonnie ruin it all for me.

"At prom. He wanted to meet the person who was as determined to lower the veil as he was. Apparently, our shared goal makes us good allies. It was quite flattering, not gonna lie, having someone as old as Silas track me down. Makes a girl feel special."

"I can't believe that you made a deal with him," Bonnie muttered, sounding as though she was shaking her head. I don't know why she was so surprised. I mean, I made a deal with Katherine, after she had killed me, to save my sister's life. Making a deal with Silas wasn't out of character for me. Everyone knew that I would do whatever it took to save my sister, to keep her in the land of the living, to bring her back to life. I felt more insulted that people wouldn't suspect me of making deals with beings powerful enough to do what I needed. Hell, if Silas didn't track me down, I almost would have been tempted to track him down. Despite my loathing of the immortal for being the one to actually making the killing move on my sister, thanks to Katherine, I knew that he would have the power to give me what I wanted. I guess he was my final option. If Bonnie failed me, then he would be there. Fortunately, my girl didn't let me down. And soon, my goal would be complete and Elena would be alive again.

"I did warn you all that I would do whatever it took to bring Elena back to life. And that includes making deals with insane immortal men. Silas can bring Elena back permanently. Match that, and I will help you with whatever you are planning. You know my goal, nothing else matters beyond bringing Elena back to life. Not even my deal with Silas. I will break it, consequences be damned, if you can guarantee me Elena's life."

The witch was silent for a moment before sighing, "I'll be lowering the veil in a couple of days, when there is a full moon. Give me that time to work out a way to bring Elena back permanently. Don't do anything foolish with Silas until then. Better yet, just avoid him."

"Like you are?" I snorted, rolling my eyes. "But fine, you have that time. However, Bonnie, if you tell anyone about this, including my deal with Silas, you will live to regret it. And you should know by now that I will go through with any threats that I make."

Bonnie sucked in a breath between her teeth before whispering, "You need me. You won't hurt me."

"Aw hon, just because I can't hurt you, doesn't mean that I can't hurt others. You have plenty of loved ones, Bon. I'll be speaking to you soon. Don't do anything foolish."

XXX

I sat on the stone railing, looking out across the garden. I rested my chin on my bent knee, one arm wrapped around it, while the other foot settled on the floor. A cool breeze disturbed my hair, brushing my bangs into my eyes, but it didn't bother me. It was nice to get some fresh air, especially since Stefan was starting to drop increasingly more aggressive hints to turn my humanity back on or else. Of course, what he didn't realise was that the 'or else' would also affect him.

I relaxed outside in peace for a while before I had company. I glanced to the side as Damon slowly closed the door shut behind him, raising an eyebrow at me as he held out a glass. I quickly accepted it before my boyfriend sat down behind me. He wrapped an arm around my waist, his chest pressing against my back.

I sipped at the bourbon before sighing, "We've been back less than a day and I'm already regretting it."

"I take it that you conversations with Caroline and April have been less than pleasant," Damon hummed, resting his chin on my shoulder. I relaxed back against him, letting my boyfriend support my weight. I knew that he wouldn't let me fall. He would never let me fall.

"They are all very insistent that I turn my humanity back on," I rolled my eyes, tapping my nails on the glass. "Caroline even acknowledged why I might not be ready to, but that didn't stop her from asking."

"Well, you'll be pleased to hear that Stefan has barely bothered me," my boyfriend smirked, pressing a kiss to my cheek. "It's almost as though something scared him into being pleasant."

"Hm, I wonder what happened there."

"Stop being coy, Alexa," my boyfriend shook his head, a smirk tugging at his lips. "What did you say to him?"

"I didn't say anything directly to him," I shrugged a shoulder, unable to hide my smirk. "But if he happened to overhear me making certain promises that were dependant on his behaviour, well, that's all on him…"

"Which conversation was that in?"

"Both," I laughed, shaking my head, before pressing a kiss to the corner of Damon's mouth. "Although if he didn't overhear it in either one, then I'm willing to bet that Caroline snitched. She wasn't very happy with me by the time she stormed out."

"Do I even want to know what you said to her?"

"Eh, probably not. It wasn't important either, just played some little mean girl mind games."

"Well, as long as you don't hurt her, then Stefan can't decide to be a little bitch."

"Is she even still here? I knew that she was talking to Matt earlier, but then her voice started annoying me and I tuned her out."

"She's still lurking in my parlour," Damon rolled his eyes, resting his free hand on my thigh. "Unfortunately, she doesn't seem inclined to leave just yet. Probably waiting for Stefan to give her some attention."

"Where is your brother? Because I've done well in avoiding him so far, and I would really prefer to keep on avoiding him."

"Ah, if he isn't pouting in the parlour then he is routing through the cupboards in the basement. He won't tell me what he is looking for but I imagine that it's something to draw an emotional reaction from you. He seems even more determined to turn your humanity back on now."

"Oh joy," I muttered as Damon slowly stroked my side. His thumb was pressed against the underside of my boob, but it didn't move. As much as I would like to distract myself from the nonsense of the gang, it wouldn't be a sensible idea to have sex on the balcony. The likelihood of us getting caught was far too high. And I really didn't want to deal with that drama. "Wonder what crawled up his ass this time. Doesn't he realise that all he has to do is be a bit patient? Bonnie will lower the veil in a couple of days and then I will be able to keep Elena in the land of the living. After that, well, I might be tempted to turn it back on. I might be tempted to just leave town for a few years. But until I can guarantee that Elena will remain on this side of the veil, I will not turn it back on."

"I would say that you should tell him that, but I know that that conversation will turn violent."

"Almost definitely," I snorted, rolling my eyes as Damon placed my empty glass behind him. I rested my hand on his, as his fingers drew patterns onto my bare thigh. "Has your brother always been this annoying? Or is it a recent development, just to brighten up my life?"

"Well, before, he had Elena to spend most of his time with. Now that she is gone, he feels as though he owes it to her to look out for you. And that includes bringing your humanity back. Whether you want it or not."

"Damn, is this his own guilt rearing its ugly head? I did wonder how he was dealing with it. Driving me insane was not what I was expecting. I had kind of hoped that he would fall off the wagon or something, that would have completely taken the attention away from me. To be honest, I'm surprised that he didn't, especially since it hasn't really been that long since he last binge. Maybe the memory of my dead sister stopped him. Or he was too busy getting all up in my business and ruining it all."

"I hate to tell you, baby, but once Elena is back, it'll probably get worse. As he'll want your humanity back for her."

"Ah damn it, I never considered that. Leaving town definitely sounds like a good idea now."

"Wherever you want to go, Alexa, I'll take you," Damon breathed into my ear, holding me close.

XXX

When Damon left to go check in with Jenna and Alaric, I remained outside. It was peaceful out here, and it seemed as though Stefan didn't want to bother me while I was out here. So I would stay outside for as long as possible. Until I got bored or hungry enough that I went back inside. Or I was driven inside by a certain insane immortal…

"Alexa, it's been a while," I spun around at the sound of my sister's voice. I knew that Bonnie hadn't dropped the veil, she needed the power of the full moon. It definitely wasn't Katherine; I would always recognise the difference between Elena and her doppelganger. Which left only one possible option.

"Silas," I narrowed my eyes at the immortal as I slowly stood up. Just in case I needed to make a quick exit. I didn't trust the immortal, even if he could give me what I wanted. "I've been out of town, needed to clear my head. Why, did you miss me?"

"Your assistance with Bonnie would have been helpful," Silas replied, standing a few steps away. His ability to mimic people was unnerving. There were absolutely no differences between his impression of my sister and my sister. They were identical in a way that the doppelgangers weren't. It was rather annoying, if I was being honest.

"Eh, you were fine, she's agreed to drop the veil," I waved away his words, leaning back against the railing. I was ready to run if needed but it didn't seem as though the immortal wanted to get physical. He was probably just dropping in to make sure that I wasn't going to betray him. And to make sure that I hadn't already betrayed him. "She's just waiting until the full moon. And then we can both get what we want."

"You've spoken to her?" the immortal raised an eyebrow, looking slightly frustrated by that news. "She's been avoiding me and I haven't quite done enough to get her attention."

Ah, she really had been avoiding his calls. Well that was amusing. That girl was definitely up to something. A part of me really did want to know what. But I didn't otherwise care. As long as I got what I wanted, Bonnie could do what she wanted. Silas too, for all I cared. Elena was my only priority. And either one of them could bring her back to me permanently. I would let them fight it out between them as to who would do that. Personally, my money was on Silas. But Bonnie had always surprised me. That girl was a fighter. And you should never count her out.

"Maybe you should threaten someone," I snorted, shaking my head. "That always seems to work with these people. Threaten someone and they will fall over to do whatever you need."

Silas had a considering look on his face, one that I had never seen on my sister's. There was a hard edge to it, a cold edge. An edge that would never appear on Elena's face. It helped me to make the distinction between the two. And stopped the immortal's mind games from working.

Eventually, he nodded, "I shall consider that idea. Bonnie has a lot of loved ones to threaten, a lot of people that I can use against her."

"Just don't add me to that list," I rolled my eyes, crossing my arms. "Bonnie does not care what happens to me anymore. I think turning sweet April Young burned that bridge for a long time. Or was it me threatening her earlier? Or was it the constant threatening? Oooh, it's just so hard to tell."

"Maybe not, you have years of friendship behind you," the immortal countered, raising a eyebrow. "That will count for something. Especially when it comes to someone as loyal as Bonnie. She won't be so quick as to abandon you. Especially if your life is in danger."

"Yeah, no, definitely don't agree with that. Find someone else to bully. Like literally anyone else. After all, I'm helping you. I'm making sure that Bonnie doesn't betray you in any way. And like you said, I have a lot of power over here, even if she doesn't like me. If I tell her to betray you, then she will betray you. So I recommend that you play nice."

"So much fire," Silas smirked, stepping closer. My body stiffened but I didn't move back. I knew that this was a test of nerve. The immortal wanted to get under my skin, to have that power over me. But I refused to give him what he wanted. I wasn't scared of Silas, and I would prove that point. "I really do hope that you don't betray me, because you can be useful in the future."

"Hm, that's nice dear," I sniffed. "Bring my sister back and I won't need to betray you."

"Just remember what will happen if you betray me. I'll even bring Elena back to land of the living, just to torture her in front of you."

"And you remember what will happen if you hurt her. I will shove that cure down your throat and rip you apart, while making sure that the veil is still up. Then you can rot on the other side forever, constantly regretting going against me," I gave a toothy smile. "Trust me on that one, Silas. I am more than capable of hurting you, stopping you from getting what you want. Don't underestimate me, just because I am only a vampire. I have stopped monsters far worse than you and lived to brag about it. An immortal with psychic powers is nothing compared to the pain that I have faced. I'm stronger than you think."

Silas narrowed his eyes, moving quicker than I expected to crowd me into the railing. He rested his hands on either side of me, moving his face in close as he growled, "I think you overestimate your strength."

I returned the glare, a smirk forming on my face as I raised an eyebrow, "I think you underestimate my capacity for revenge. And my ability to carry it out."

XXX

After Silas fucked off to torment someone else, I disappeared back inside. I had to make sure that he didn't decide to use me as a message instead. I highly doubted that he would, but I didn't particularly want to take that chance. So I returned to the library with my empty glass.

Unfortunately, I wasn't alone when I entered. Stefan was stood by the sofa, arms crossed and his favourite frown on his face. I rolled my eyes, placing my glass on the fireplace mantle before crossing my own arms, "What do you want?"

"We haven't properly talked since you returned," the older vampire said, stepping closer. He stared at me, eyes examining my face. I could tell that he was looking for something, but I didn't know what. A sign that my humanity was returning? God knows. Either way, I wasn't going to give him what he wanted.

"Oh no, what a travesty," I rolled my eyes, shaking my head. "I haven't spoken to the person that has been constantly annoying me. Whatever will I do?"

"I know that the old Alexa is in there somewhere," Stefan sighed, a sad look flashing across his face before he moved to sit down on the sofa. His arms rested on his knees as he looked up at me. "My friend is still in there, hidden away, underneath all of that pain and grief."

"Good luck finding her," I scoffed. "That Alexa is not going to come out to play for a long time. Until, ooh, I don't know, her sister is back in her life and everyone stops trying to force her to do something that she doesn't want to do."

"Look, Alexa, I get it. You don't want to let in all of that pain and that guilt. It's natural to be afraid of it, I was, when I turned it off. But trust me, it'll be better for everyone, especially you, if you turn your humanity back on and let me help you through it."

"Just like you helped my sister?" I narrowed my eyes, showing a hint of fang. "Like you helped her deal with the sacrifice." I lowered my voice mockingly, "Oh Elena, of course you can sacrifice yourself, you can do whatever suicidal thing you want to do. I'll stop everyone who wants to save you." My voice returned to normal as I snorted, "Or what about you helping her with her emotions after she dumped your ass. No, wait, you were just a petty little bitch then. You were too busy being snarky and disrespecting not only her choice but mine too. You set our brother on a path that we nearly didn't bring him back from before asking Rebekah to compel away the memories of your relationship. Before later sleeping with her. So forgive me if I don't want you to help me through the inevitable emotional overload once I eventually turn my humanity back on."

"You're lashing out," the younger Salvatore nodded, sounding annoyingly calm. "That's understandable. But this isn't healthy. You've hurt so many people, Alexa, I can't let you carry on like this."

"Well, luckily for me, it's not your choice. Even if I was so inclined to turn it back on right now, you don't have a say in how I do it, how I cope with it. Hell, even when I did it. Damon is the only person that I trust to tell me when it's the right time to turn it on, if I haven't recognised that for myself. Fortunately, my boyfriend actually respects my choice. You know, that thing that you used to do for Elena. Or is it only Elena's choices that you care to respect?"

"I respect the choices that don't hurt other people."

"Hm, interesting. You know, I haven't actually killed anyone since Willoughby. April doesn't count cos she came back. And you know why I haven't killed anyone? Because Damon asked me not to. All I've done is feed from people and hurt their feelings. Or does a few bitchy words count as hurting other people? I mean, I know that Caroline is sensitive, but is she that sensitive that you must force me to do something that I don't want to do?"

"You're still hurting people by feeding on them," Stefan's voice was calm and it had me narrowing my eyes. My hands clenched into fists as I debated whether it was worth just decking him. But since he was older than me, it wouldn't be a fair fight. So I grabbed my glass from the mantle and stalked over to the booze table. I filled up my glass before I ignored my more sensible instincts.

"I'm doing what a normal vampire does, asshole," I spat, shaking my head. "Vampires feed from people, it's what we do. Snatch, eat, erase. The vampire motto. Just because you are the worst vampire in existence, doesn't mean that others can't feed from people. Tell me, how many vampires have actually survived on the bunny diet and not fallen off the rails? Oh yeah, that's right, none. Not even the new vampires that you manipulate can stay on the bunny diet. God, Damon definitely did the right thing by getting me to feed from people straight away."

"You never get it a chance."

"I didn't need to, I knew that it was the wrong thing for me," I muttered, before taking a sip from my drink. The liquid burned my mouth and throat, causing me to choke. I dropped my glass to the side as I realised what the familiar taste was.

Vervain.

Someone had spiked the alcohol with vervain. I coughed and spluttered, trying to get rid of the burning sensation. I narrowed my eyes, glaring at the older vampire as he walked towards me. It had to have been him. There was no one else with the balls to do this to me. Stefan sighed as he wrapped an arm around my waist. I grabbed his arm, squeezing tight, before there was a sharp pain in my neck. As my body grew weak, I muttered out a slow curse before darkness took me.

XXX

I woke up tied to a chair in the parlour. A heavily curtained window was to the side, the curtains meeting just in front of me. A heavy rope tied my wrists to the wooden chair, it was one of the chairs that sat around the side of the room, in case there were more guests than expected for dinner. I tugged slightly, but my body was still too weak from the vervain to break free.

A loud clang to the side had me rolling my head to look. Jamie placed a fire extinguisher on the floor, a regretful look on his face as he looked down at me. I weakly rolled my eyes, "He got you involved too? Poor kid. Hopefully Bonnie won't be too mad with me when I rip your arms off."

"I'm doing this for her," Jamie shook his head. "You keep hurting Bonnie. Maybe having your humanity back will stop that."

"Brave of you to assume that this will work," I gritted my teeth, narrowing my eyes. I knew what they were going to do. They were going to torture me into turning it back on. Well, the joke was on them because I was not going to be forced into allowing my humanity back into my soul. I would not play their game. Besides, all I had to do was hold out until Damon returned home. They wouldn't be able to do with this my boyfriend around. He would soon put a stop to that bullshit.

"It'll work, Alexa," Stefan sighed, walking into the room and approaching the curtain. "It always works." He carefully pulled back the curtain, just a crack, but enough to let some sunshine into the room. It crept across the rug, stopping just before it reached my hand. My hand without my daylight ring. I glanced around the room before seeing it on the table in front of me. Well, at least it would be easy for me to get my hands on once I broke free. Or once my boyfriend broke me free.

"I'll take that as challenge," I bared my teeth, clenching my hands into fists. "Because you see, while you might hurt me, the pain that awaits me when I turn my humanity back on is stronger. I can cope with this for a little while. So go on, do it."

The older vampire stared at me for a moment before shaking his head, "Focus on this pain, Alexa. Think only about what you are going through right now. We can deal with everything else once your humanity is back."

"That's what you think," I muttered just as Stefan pulled the curtain open wider. The sunlight hit my hand and immediately started burning me. I couldn't hold in the yell of pain as my skin immediately blistered, going red. My hand clenched into a fist as I tried to break the rope. But it didn't do anything. My body was still too weak and the pain was too strong. It took almost no time at all for a fire to ignite on my skin. Before it could spread too far up my arm, Jamie grabbed the fire extinguisher. The cool spray soon put out the fire as Stefan let go of the curtain.

"Did that do anything?" the kid asked as I hunched over, my eyes scrunched up as I spat out little curses. My nails dug into the wood of the chair as the pain lingered.

"No, she'll need more," the younger Salvatore sighed, shaking his head. He remained crouched down by the window, hand still holding the curtain. But I could feel his eyes on me, examining me, looking for any indication that his plan was working. As the pain started to fade, I lifted my head to glare at the other vampire. He was the one in control and so, he was the one that earned my fury.

"If Damon doesn't kill you for this, then I sure as hell will," I spat, my face changing as I tugged on the rope again.

Stefan stared at me for a moment before climbing to his feet and walking over. He crouched down in front of me, a hand resting on my knee before he softly said, "I don't want to do this, Alexa. We can stop right now. It's your choice. You know what you need to do."

"You're a fool if you think that I'm going to let you win here," I growled, yanking my knee to the side, dislodging Stefan's hand. "You're right, it's my choice. And I have made my choice. You just refuse to accept my choice but it isn't what you want. Just like me turning into a vampire wasn't what you wanted. Just like me feeding on people wasn't what you wanted. Just like Elena dumping your pathetic ass wasn't what you wanted. So go on, pull that curtain back again, burn me again, all you'll be doing is hurting yourself."

"Alexa, I know what you are going through. After all you have done, you're afraid to face the guilt that you'll feel if you turn your humanity back on. The only way that I can help you is to make the alternative hurt even worse."

"Nothing that you do to me will hurt worse than losing Elena," I muttered, my head falling back against the chair as the other vampire walked back over to the curtain. I heard his grab the fabric, the curtain ring scrapping against the rail, before he yanked the curtain back. Sunlight filled the room, landing on my body, my arms, my face. My skin immediately turned red, blistering as the light burned me. Pain consumed by body as I let out a loud scream. I erupted from my body as my back arched. I tugged on the ropes holding me against the chair as I tried to escape the burning light. But there was nothing that I could do. Fortunately, I was no longer alone.

I heard the sound of vampire speed before the sunlight disappeared. My eyes remained closed as I panted and gasped my way through the pain, my body slow to heal. My head rested against the back of the chair, the carved wood digging into my skin. But it was enough to focus on, getting me through the pain without showing too much weakness. It wasn't until I heard a voice yelling that I opened my eyes.

"What the fuck are you doing?!"

Jenna stood to the edge of the room, a furious look on her face as one hand rested on her baby bump. Damon had Stefan pressed against the wall, a look of pure rage on his face as his fingers curled into the soft fabric of his brother's t-shirt. Content that I was finally safe, I allowed my body to relax.

XXX

Damon dragged his brother out of the room while Jenna carefully cut the ropes from my wrists. She went to throw the rope away but gasped when it stuck to my still healing skin. Apparently the rough fabric had stuck to the blistered skin and my body had just healed around it. It was annoying, but I could deal with that. I carefully moved Jenna's hands out of the way before grabbing the end of the rope with one hand. I yanked it free, ignoring the sharp pain and the odd sort of squelching noise as I pulled away from my skin. I threw it to the side before doing the same with the other piece of rope.

I clenched and unclenched my fists as the skin finally properly healed before glancing up at my aunt. Jenna watched my skin heal with a nauseous look on her face. One hand had drifted down to cradle her bump as swayed slightly. I quickly grabbed her elbows, easing the woman to her feet before ordering Jamie to help her over to the sofa. The kid did as commanded, a fearful look on his face as he glanced at me. As pissed off as I was, I knew that he had just been manipulated by Stefan. He didn't do this willingly. So I wouldn't kill him, I would just find another way to punish him. After I had something to eat.

I disappeared down to the basement, grabbing a handful of blood bags before heading back upstairs. I had just reached the door to the basement when I heard raised voices. I glanced over to see Jamie looking after Jenna, passing her a glass of water. Content that she was being looked after, I followed the voices.

The Salvatore Brothers were in the library and they weren't happy. I slowly sipped at one blood bag while Damon yelled at his brother, "What the fuck do you think you were doing?"

"I was doing something to get hurt humanity back, Damon!" the younger brother snapped back, pacing back and forth in front of the fire. "Someone had to do something, since you were content to let her go around killing people and hurting her friends."

"I was respecting her choice, Stefan. Or is that only allowed when you are respecting Elena's choices? I know that you've never cared for Alexa's. You almost turned her brother into a monster to get a cure that she didn't want. Hell, you put her brother in danger to get a cure that she didn't want."

"Elena's choices never got anyone killed," Stefan denied, before stopping his brother from drinking the tainted alcohol. Damon let out a hissed curse before filling a glass from a different bottle.

"That you know of. She could have gotten Caroline and Tyler killed during the sacrifice. Her choice to just give in would have gotten someone else killed. She wasn't the only one who died during that sacrifice."

"That's not the point, Damon. You've done nothing but enable Alexa. You're just as responsible for her kills as she is."

"Alexa hasn't killed anyone in at least a couple of months. She has been content to just find a way to save her sister and enjoy her immortal life. A concept that you know nothing about, I know. But that isn't the point here. You had absolutely no right to torture my girl!" the fury in my boyfriend's voice had me raising an eyebrow. He threw the bottle towards the fire, the glass shattering as it hit the brick. The fire flared out as the booze gave it strength. Stefan winced, both at the throw and his brother's words.

"It was the only way to get her humanity back! She hurt Caroline, she's been manipulating Bonnie, she turned April. No one knows what she will do next! She needs her humanity back, Damon, before she goes too far."

"You just don't trust me to look after her while she is like this. Because I won't force her to turn it back on. Well, the jokes on you, brother. As soon as Alexa has done what she needs to do to bring Elena back to life, we're leaving town. I won't risk her getting hurt by you again."

"You'll take her away from her family? From the people that love her?" Stefan asked in surprise, raising an eyebrow. I knew that he never expected us to leave town. He always assumed that my family would keep me here. My sister, my brother, my aunt, the new baby. But we would always have to leave eventually, once it became noticeable that I was no longer aging like Elena was. It would just be a case of leaving earlier than expected.

"I'll take her away from the people that hurt her," there was dark promise to Damon's voice. "My girl has been hurt enough times. To see you torturing her, forcing her to do something that she doesn't want to do? I won't let that happen again."

"I had to try something," Stefan sighed tiredly, shaking his head. "I had to help her. The longer that she avoids turning it back on, the less she will want to."

"You know, she came close to turning it back on when we were out of town. But she wasn't ready, and you know why she wasn't ready? Because her twin sister was still dead. If you think that she will be able to turn it on before Elena is alive again, then you're a bigger idiot than I thought you were."

"Alexa can't bring Elena back, not when it means lowering the veil. We have to stop Silas from doing that. Even if it means that Elena is gone forever."

"I wouldn't let Alexa hear you say that, she would rip your spine out. I might even let her, brother. By hurting my girl, you have hurt me. I left you alone with her, despite my better judgement. I will not make that mistake again."

XXX

I returned to Jenna when I heard her asking Jamie where I was. While the brothers probably guessed that I was eavesdropping, I didn't want to make it obvious that I was. So I left them to their argument to go speak to my aunt.

Jenna looked up at me when I entered the parlour, one hand resting on her bump, a glass of water in the other. She had a relieved look on her face when she saw me, and I couldn't help but remember the look of pure anger on her face when she saw that I was being tortured. She still cared about me, even after everything that I had done. She didn't want me to get hurt. It was… humbling. I always knew that my aunt was a good person, but to still love her monster of a niece, it was a feeling that dug its way into those cracks in the wall that held back my humanity.

"Thank you," I said quietly as I took a seat next to her. I clasped my hands together, resting them on my knees as I stared ahead of me. I didn't want to see what the look on my aunt's face was. She might have been doubting stopping Stefan from torturing me into turning my humanity back on. I doubted that that was the case. But I couldn't help but consider it.

"Of course," my aunt smiled softly, reaching out to rest her hand on mine. "I don't want to see you get hurt, Lexa. I still love you. You're my niece, no matter what."

"Even after everything that I've done," I quirked my lips up into a wry smile. "Seems a bit foolish."

"We all have a past, Alexa. We've all done things that we aren't proud of. You forget, it wasn't that long ago that Ric was our enemy, that he was torturing Caroline and trying to kill so many of our loved ones."

"But that's different," I frowned, glancing over at Jenna before quickly looking away. The soft look on her face, the love in her eyes, it was too much. And I didn't want to deal with the consequences of that look. "Alaric was turned into a vampire but Esther, she made his hunter side dominant. He would never have done those things if he was in control."

"And you would never have done the things that you have done if you were in control," my aunt gave my hand a squeeze before reaching out to grasp my chin. She gently turned my head, forcing me to meet her gaze. "You were controlled by your pain, Lexa. You would never have turned it off if Elena didn't die. Everyone knows it. You were coping well with being a vampire before that happened. I meant what I said before, I know that you've done some bad things, but I will never reject you for it. I know that you will feel guilty when you turn it back on, whenever that may be."

"You mean that you aren't going to force me to turn it back on?" I asked suspiciously, a frown forming on my face. I knew that my aunt didn't want me to be tortured. But I still expected her to push me to turn it back on. Surely she wanted me to have my humanity back in time for her baby to be born. To stop me from hurting anyone else. It just didn't feel right that she wouldn't push me into letting my humanity back in.

"Of course not," Jenna sighed, shaking her head. "I don't want to see you in pain, Lexa. And I know that you will be in a tremendous amount of pain if you turned it back on now, before you're ready. I'm just relieved that you came back to town."

"Well, I still need to bring Elena back to life," I shrugged, glancing away before I muttered. "And I didn't want to miss the birth of your child. Someone needs to make sure that you and the baby are safe. And I don't trust any of this lot to look after you both, Alaric aside."

"I'm glad you came home," Jenna whispered before pulling me into a tight hug. I rested one hand on her back, the other on her knee. I wasn't expecting my aunt to hug me like this. Before I left for a few weeks, she was still a bit hesitant to be close to me. I wondered if my absence had made her miss me. If she genuinely worried that I wouldn't come back, and that she would be losing both of her nieces.

I cleared my throat, glancing to the side as Damon stepped into the parlour. He glanced at the pregnant woman holding me tight, squeezing me against her, before raising an eyebrow and looking at me. I just shrugged, patting Jenna's back. I could feel a wetness against my skin and just knew that my aunt was crying. Why she was crying, I didn't know. But the fact was, she was crying. So I sighed and rubbed her back, "It's going to be okay, Jenna. I'll bring Elena back to life and your family will be complete again." I paused for a second, "Well, as complete as it was before."

"And you promise that you won't leave me again?" Jenna asked, her face still pressed against my shoulder. "That you will turn your humanity back on again and that we'll all be a family again?"

"I promise," I spoke slowly, resting my hand on her bump as the little one inside her shifted. I felt a pressure against my hand and glanced down. The heart within was beating strong, a comforting sound as the baby shifted again. "You won't get rid of my that easily, Jenna. You'll just need to bear with me as I work through some things."

"I don't care, I just don't want you to leave again."

XXX

After I had persuaded Jenna to head home and relax, I retreated to the library. Stefan was gone, probably brooding elsewhere in the house, where he knew that his brother wouldn't go. It was probably a good thing, as I almost definitely would have snapped. I could feel my humanity pressing against the wall that I had locked it behind, my aunt's words and tears giving it strength. But I refused to give in. I wouldn't turn it back on, not yet.

I had just poured myself a drink, settling into the chair closest to the fire, when the most unwelcome face on the planet sauntered into the room. I rolled my eyes as Katherine smirked at me, "Oh honey, it's been far too long."

"Oh do fuck off," I muttered before narrowing my eyes at her. "What the fuck are you doing here? Why aren't you dead?"

"Me? Oh, I'm just hear to see what's happening," the bitch purred, walking over to perch herself on the sofa. She rested one elbow on the arm of the sofa before leaning closer to me. "I heard that Stefan was most distraught when he failed to torture you into turning your humanity back on. Tut tut, you really shouldn't be so disrespectful to your elders"

"God, even your voice is annoying," I groaned, slumping back into my seat. "Why aren't you dead? Did Klaus forget to rip your heart out before he left? That little bitch can't do anything right."

"He did have competing priorities," Bitcherine shrugged, before narrowing her eyes. "Tell me, what did you say to Elijah back in Willoughby?"

"Lol, why? Bitter that he dumped your ancient ass?" I rolled my eyes. "Your actions have consequences, darling."

"Tell me what you said to turn him against me, or I will feed you your own eyeballs," Katherine growled before speeding forward. She pushed me back against the seat, holding me down with one hand while the other moved towards me face. I reached up to grab her hand before it could get anywhere near my eyes.

"A: fuck off," I lifted my foot up to kick her away before sitting up, getting ready to move if needed. "B: you being dumped by Elijah is all your own fault. Yes, I told him the truth, that you murdered Elena. You know, a girl that he had always been fond of. But if you really want to blame someone, look in the fucking mirror. You're a deranged, psychotic bitch. One who has been on the run for centuries. You're incapable of dealing with anything in a healthy way, you murder and lie and cheat your way through life. There is no way that Elijah would want to be with someone like that."

"Yeah, I've done some pretty horrible things to survive, but unlike you, I've never turned it off," the bitch snapped, pacing back and forth in front of the fire, an angry look on her face.

"Is that supposed to be some kind of achievement?" I scoffed, shaking my head. "Hon, the fact that you can do all of those horrible things with your humanity on says quite a lot about you. And none of it is good. Yes, I turned it off. After someone murdered my twin sister. I turned it off so that I can kill the people that I needed to kill to bring her back, so that I could expose everything to our dead enemies so that I could bring my sister back. I don't like killing people. And because of that, my humanity would have just gotten in the way."

"God, you're so pathetic," Katherine rolled her eyes, stopping right in front of me. She had her arms crossed; her eyes narrowed as she looked down at me. I didn't know if she would attack me again, she didn't look like she would but when it came to this bitch, it was hard to tell. So I scooted to the edge of my seat, where I could push myself up if she even started to make a move against me. I knew that I wouldn't really stand a chance if she did try to attack me, so my best bet would be to just run. Katherine wouldn't waste the energy chasing me, so I knew that I would be safe if I did just leave the room.

"You're so pathetic," I repeated mockingly. "Your insults are so plain these days. Why don't you think of something a bit more creative and then come back to me. Because this conversation is boring me. And I have better things to do with my time."

I got up and went to push past the bitch, but she grabbed my arm before I could. I looked over at her, eyebrow raised, as she spat, "Maybe I should have killed you instead of Elena. You really are one of the most frustrating people that I have ever met. God, I should have permanently killed you before you became a vampire."

"Perhaps," I shrugged, trying to tug my arm free from her grip but the bitch just squeezed my arm harder. "Maybe if you had done so, you wouldn't have lost both Damon and Elijah. But hey ho, you're a thick bitch and there is no fixing that. So why don't you do everyone a favour and just fuck off? Preferably forever but I would take for the next month as a substitute."

"You think you're so powerful as a vampire, but you wouldn't last a week without everyone fawning over you."

"You think that everyone has been fawning over me?" I raised an eyebrow before laughing, shaking my head. "Bitch, the only one that has 'fawned' over me was Damon, you know, my boyfriend, the man that loves me, the others were more concerned with curing me. So are there any other lies that you would like to say or can I leave now?"

"I will make you pay for your insolence."

"Yeah, yeah," I rolled my eyes, finally tugging my arm free. I started to walk towards the back exit, ignoring Katherine's glare, muttering as I did so, "That's what you always say and yet here I am, still alive."

XXX

After my little encounter with Katherine, I decided that it would be safer for me to take a walk through the woods. Since I would almost definitely get bothered by the bitch again. And if I encountered anyone else, then I would not react nicely to any possible criticism.

I stalked through the trees, pushing errant branches out of my way as I just walked. I didn't pick any particular direction, just away from the Boarding House. It had been a frustrating day, what with Caroline and Silas and Katherine. And with Stefan fucking torturing me. God, that was annoying. I honestly regretted returning to Mystic Falls. I should have just continued touring the country with Damon. Bonnie had decided to drop the veil while I was gone, she would make sure that Elena came back to life properly. I didn't need to be back here. I could be content just relaxing at the beach, spending time with my boyfriend.

I paused in a clearing after walking for a couple of hours. No one had gone looking for me, which was a relief. Damon had checked in via text before, but when I told him that he was okay, he was content to leave me be. And that was one of the reasons why I was glad that he was mine. He knew that I needed space after the day that I had had. And he gave it to me. To be fair, he was probably busy tearing his brother a new one for torturing me. I was almost tempted to join in, but I didn't particularly want to look at the younger Salvatore. He had betrayed my trust. It was bad enough that he had spent the past couple of months forcing me to turn my humanity back on. But to torture me into doing it? Nah, that crossed a line. He was just lucky that my priority had been Jenna in those few moments after. Because I would have literally ripped his spine out of his body and impaled him with it.

With a sigh, I leant back against the tree behind me, looking up into the sky above. It was dark out now, the stars clearly visible in the sky. There was something peaceful about the darkness, about being outside. The cool air brushed against my skin, cooling down my anger. The only good thing about returning to town was that I saw Jenna. I was able to confirm that my aunt was dealing with this all. That both her and the baby were okay. If it wasn't for her, I might have been tempted to just ditch town the moment that Stefan tortured me. God. I never thought that he would ever do that to me. Even when I did eventually turn my humanity back on, I didn't think that I would forgive him for it. That crossed a line. Yes, I had done some pretty horrific things, but to torture me because I wasn't doing what he wanted, it was unreal.

I shook my head, scuffing my foot against the ground. The last time that I was amongst the trees, I was killing werewolves. And now, I was using them to avoid a lot of undesirable people. How quickly some things had changed. Not that the others would ever know about the little encounter with the remainder of Jules' pack. No, that would remain a secret between me and Damon. God knows how Stefan would react if he heard about that. He would probably tell me off for killing them. Even if they did intend to kill me first.

Leaving town after Jenna had her baby, after Bonnie dropped the veil and brought Elena back did sound like a good idea. I would be content in the knowledge that my family had been reunited. They would be fine without me. They would be alive and safe, together again. I wasn't needed by them, not really. Alaric could protect them, keep them safe. He was a lot stronger than me anyway. Nah, they didn't need me. I could leave town without worry. A few years ahead of schedule, but at this moment in time, I didn't particularly care. I was done with most of the people here.

I pulled my phone out of my pocket when I felt it buzz. I glanced down to see a text from my boyfriend, 'Silas is lurking around town, be careful out there'. Ah, so someone else had discovered him. A part of me wondered who he had gone after, to leave a message for Bonnie. Since he was at the Boarding House earlier, I assumed that it was someone there. Maybe Matt or Caroline. Either way, it wasn't me. And that was all I cared about.

I texted back, letting him know that I would be careful, before tucking my phone back into my pocket. I knew that it was only a matter of time before Damon started looking for me. He had always been prone to worrying, even if he wouldn't admit to anyone. The fact that Silas was around definitely worried my boyfriend. Especially since he knew about the deal that I had made for him. I knew that the immortal wouldn't target me, he still needed me to make sure that Bonnie followed through. No, I wouldn't be in danger until the witch did whatever trickery she was planning. My only hope was that Elena was permanently alive again before that happened. I could deal with Silas if I didn't need to worry about bringing her back.

I pushed myself away from the tree, slowly walking through the woods again. I didn't need to speed anywhere; I could take my time walking. Damon would be able to track me down quite easily, if he chose to. Otherwise he would just call me. So until I was required to head back to the Boarding House, I would just enjoy the peace of the evening. I would appreciate the feeling of the breeze against my skin, the stars in the sky and the silence around me.

XXX

I had been walking for just under an hour when I heard a low groan. A very familiar low groan. I frowned before quickly speeding through the trees, heading towards the noise. I hoped that it wasn't what I thought it was, but I knew that I was not that lucky.

I came to a stop by Jenna's car. The vehicle was dark, the driver's door open. I paused to look for my aunt, but I didn't need to pause for long. Within seconds, I heard another groan by the trunk of the car. I dashed around there, to see Jenna hunched over. One hand rested on her bump; her eyes scrunched closed as she let out another groan. Her phone laid on the ground in front of her and I carefully moved it out of the way before crouching down. I reached out to rest my hand on Jenna's, the one that was squeezing the edge of the car, "Hey, Jenna, what's wrong?"

"Alexa, thank god," she gasped, opening her eyes to look down at me. Relief warred with pain on her face as she grabbed my hand, giving it a hard squeeze. Another groan forced its way through her lips before she shook her head, "The baby's coming."

"Then why aren't you at the hospital?" I frowned, looking around. It was one of the backroads through the woods, one that headed towards the hospital. It looked as though she was making her way there. But something must have stopped her. "And why didn't you call anyone?"

"I tried," my aunt responded as I rose to my feet. I wrapped an arm around her waist, carefully easing her round to the passenger side. I settled her into the seat, allowing her to squeeze my hand as much as needed when a contraction hit. "The car… it ran out of gas… and I've got no signal out here… I tried, but I dropped it and couldn't pick it up…"

"Goddamnit," I cursed, shaking my head. I passed Jenna her phone, helping her tuck it into her bag. "Right, do you have any gas in the trunk? I know that Alaric likes to keep extra." When my aunt nodded, I rose to my feet. "Okay, stay here. I'll fill up the car and drive you to the hospital. How far apart are your contractions?"

"I don't know," Jenna shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut. A tear trickled down her cheek, one that I quickly wiped away. I knew that she must have been so scared, out here, by herself, with the baby on the way. She was lucky that I had found her. I didn't want to think what the alternative would have been. "I haven't been able to count."

"Alright, Jenna, I need you to count the time between them while I fill up the car, okay? That is your only job right now."

I went to move but my aunt grabbed my hand, looking up at me with tearful eyes, her voice shaking, "Alexa, I'm scared."

"Hey," I cupped her face with my free hand, putting the most comforting look that I could on my face. "It's going to be okay; I promise. I'm going to get you to the hospital and you will be able to have your baby in the safest place possible. You will not have your baby in this forest. Trust me on that."

"I trust you," Jenna murmured as I carefully eased my hand from hers. Using my vampire speed, I grabbed the gas can from the trunk and filled up the car. While I did so, I pulled out my phone, dialling Alaric's number. When he picked up, I quickly spoke, "Jenna is in labour. I'm taking her to the hospital. Meet me there."

"What? Alexa? Is she okay?" Alaric quickly stuttered out, sounding as though he was waving away questions. "What happened?"

"No idea, I found her in the woods. Look, your job right now is to get the hospital. Ask your questions later, if you must. I'll see you in a few."

Before the other vampire could speak, I hung up the call, tucking my phone back into my pocket. I placed the empty can back in the trunk before speeding around to the driver's seat. I climbed into the car, turning it on before putting my foot down. From the fearful look that Jenna gave me, I knew that her contractions were closer together than she was hoping. Which meant that I had to get her to the hospital. And fast.

I used all of my vampire reflexes to get us both to the hospital. I knew for a fact that I broke several speed limits as I drove, but I didn't care. My only priority was getting Jenna to the hospital. Where she could safely have her baby.

Alaric met me in the carpark, Meredith hovering behind me. The moment that I came to a stop, Alaric was pulling open the car door, carefully easing Jenna out of the car. Meredith pushed forward a wheelchair, which my aunt was gently lowered into. Then before I could blink, the doctor was whisking her inside. I paused by the car, looking at the entrance to the hospital before sighing. Alaric was still stood by the car, a conflicted look on his face. One that had me rolling my eyes, "You'd best get your ass in there. If I find out that you have not been by Jenna's side, supporting her and helping her through this, I will be pissed."

"What if I'm a danger to her in there?" the other vampire asked quietly, shaking his head. "I'm still not 100% in control. I don't want to hurt her."

"Okay, let me put it this way, if at any time, your bloodlust rears its ugly head, just remember that I am more than capable of torturing you. So go look after Jenna, as her boyfriend and as that baby's father. You owe her that. You owe her everything."

XXX

I stared down at the baby in my arms. Jenna had safely delivered her child, Alaric at her side the entire time. Once she was ready, my aunt had requested that Jeremy and I join her in the hospital. At first, I had lingered by the door, wondering if I should really be there. But then Jeremy passed me the baby.

Zoe.

They had called her Zoe. Zoe Saltzman-Sommers. She had Jenna's eyes, a warm hazel, with a tiny tuft of brown hair on her head. As the baby snoozed in my arms, I couldn't take my eyes off of her. Despite being a vampire, despite being a monster, this innocent little child was content to sleep in my arms. One tiny hand gripped my finger, her hold strong despite her young age, as she curled into me. It was a humbling feeling, holding a life so innocent, so pure. After everything that I had done, I didn't deserve this baby's trust.

The others spoke quietly amongst themselves, checking in on Jenna after the birth. Jeremy's phone pinged with messages of congratulations from the rest of the group. Alaric subtly sipped on a blood bag, making sure to keep it hidden when the nurses bustled in and out. He had gotten through it all without any issues, despite his earlier fears. Maybe my words had had an impact. Because they were true. I would have made his life hell if he had abandoned Jenna in her time of need. I would have hurt him, tortured him, for causing Jenna any emotional pain.

As I stared down at the baby in my arms, I felt something within me give. It started as a crack, a painful feeling deep within my chest. One that had my heart constricting, squeezing in my chest. I knew exactly what it was. And God, I wasn't surprised. I should have known. I really should have known that this innocent life would be the one to do this to me. That this baby would destroy the walls holding my humanity back. As the cracks started spreading, I carefully passed Zoe back to her mother, avoiding all eye contact.

I muttered some excuse before speeding from the room. I made it to the car park before my legs gave out on me. I clutched at my chest, my nails digging into the skin over my heart as I squeezed my eyes shut. I couldn't break. I couldn't let it all back in. I would be useless to everyone if I did. I wouldn't be able to bring Elena back. I wouldn't be able to keep my family safe from Silas, especially if Bonnie ended up forcing me to break my deal with the immortal. I had to keep my humanity out, I had to stop it.

I felt a tear trickle down my cheek as I leant back against Jenna's car. I ruthlessly scrubbed it away, refusing to let anymore fall. I could feel the guilt, the pain, the grief, fighting its way back in. And I couldn't let it in. I couldn't let any of it in.

XXX

A/N: Thank you for the reviews, my darlings :) please keep them coming! I'm hoping to reach 550 reviews by the end of the season, hopefully we can get there! I do love hearing your thoughts and since a lot of these chapters right now are original content, it makes me feel better to know that you like what I am writing! Not sure when the next chapter will be up, but hopefully soon. Until next time, I hope you enjoyed xoxo