Beeep.
Beeeep.
Beeeep.
Beeep.
Click.
« Geto Suguru, leave a message. »
9 unchecked messages
From : Satoru
january 1st, 2018 at 6:00 am.
« Hey Suguru, Happy new year. It's Satoru.I know it doesn't matter anymore, but you always used to said that you needed to talk you feeling out if you struggled with them. Pretty hypocritical of you, if you want my piece of mind. Ah, but I guess you don't. You won't hear it anyway… don't know why I said that. »
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From : Satoru
january 1st, 2018 at 9:00 am.
« Hey, Suguru, I was saying…yeah, the shit you were saying about emotion, I might follow your word on it ?Seem like if I don't talk it out to you even if you can't hear it, I might never process what kind of mess you let in me. »
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From : Satoru
january 3rd, 2018 at 3:00 am.
« Hey, me again, uh.. shit. Don't know why I keep talking to this fucking voicemail like you will listen to it. Not like you can, you're dead. it's so stupid what I'm doing I'm getting second hand embarrassment of myself. »
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From : Satoru
january 3rd, 2018 at 4:00 am.
« I dialed off again, sorry, couldn't handle the embarrassment I was putting myself in. I guess I'm really hopeless, letting a voicemail again…Shoko said that it was not so stupid but I assure you that it doesn't feel like it. »
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From : Satoru
january 18th, 2018 at 6:00 pm.
« Guess I'm at it again, it's Hime that forced me to try it again. I suppose I'm getting on her last nerve. These last days…were difficult. The wave of grief come and go, some days more bearable than others. Im not easy on her and Shoko. I understand the frustration if I'm honest. I would be annoyed as hell too if i were in they shoes. They don't have your shoulder… Eh.
But they stayed, so I reckon it's a good thing they don't.
I'm petty, I know. I'm not sorry.
Wouldn't have thought I would be a sore loser like that. Uh. I should've guessed it be the case.
..I shouldn't have said to her what I was trying to do. Ok. That's enough. I hope she get off my ass. Girls are menace, I swear to you. Remind me why I'm gay, thanks god. »
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From : Satoru
january 20th, 2018 at 4:00 am.
« Me. Again. What a surprise in hell you might have. »
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From : Satoru
january 21th, 2018 at 9:00 pm.
« The dark humor was too much, I cried like a little girl, ew. I can't even be myself because you make me a weak thing, even in death. You're the worse, Suguru. »
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From : Satoru
january 22th, 2018 at 9:00am.
« I still miss you. »
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From : Satoru
january 22th, 2018 at 5:00 pm.
« I still love you.»
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From : Satoru
january 22th, 2018 at 5:04pm.
« Fuck you for that. »
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From : Satoru
january 22th, 2018 at 5:30.
« And I'll say it everytime I want to, I can curse you whenever I want and it won't stick.»
he take a shaky exhale.
«It doesn't matter anymore. »
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From : Satoru
january 23th, 2018 at 4:00 am.
«…You know, you made me a weak little thing, but you made me feel grandiose too, I hope you knew. »
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From : Satoru
january 23th, 2018 at 5:00 am.
« ..I hope I made you feel grandiose too. You never let me knew. »
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From : Satoru
january 24th, 2018 at 7:00 pm.
« I would've listen, you know ? Even after you've gone. Might've spitted in your face in the process, But I would have listened. »
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From : Satoru
january 24th, 2018 at 7:30 pm.
« The spitting part, you would have loved it you were naughty like that. »
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From : Satoru
january 25th, 2018 at 1:00 am.
« I cried again. I'm so embarassing. My awesome self can't cry at morbid jokes anymore. So stop it. Whatever you're doing to me from wherever you are, stop it please. » he hate the quavering in his voice.
« Please. »
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From : Satoru
february 10th, 2018 at 5:00 pm.
« Hime pulled me into it again. She said I was being ridiculous and infuriating but that it helped me coping. Do you believe it ? I'm agreeing with her. It must be a sunny day in hell. Did you get a good tan today ? »
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From : Satoru
february 11th, 2018 at 2:00 am.
« Suguru, I'll stop mentioning I cried, it's starting to be absurd. »
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From : Satoru
march 3rd, 2018 at 2:30 pm.
« Hey Suguru, we've been ennemies longer than lovers, doesn't that sound crazy ? »
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From : Satoru
march 21th, 2018 at 5:00 pm.
« It's spring again, don't know why I'm being surprised that I'm disappointed. it never felt the same since 2007 anyway. I went to Hanami, without you. It was dull and the color of the cherry blossoms gave me nausea. An other thing you ruined for me. »
Click.
From : Satoru
march 31th, 2018 at 3:00 pm.
« It's a good advice you given me. I fare better these days. Don't know why you didn't followed them, Mr I'm Smarter than everyone else. »
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From : Satoru
april 4th, 2018 at 10:00 pm.
« It's April. Theses four months felt like ten years. Time flies and everyday is a reminder that you can't turn back the clock. I still see you everywhere I go. There will be a new kid in the year Megumi's in. A girl, she come from the countryside. Like the two duckling that followed you everywhere you went. You never tale how they came in your care, but I can guess how, now. Country village can be pretty rough with sorcery. You're were always so kind, so sensitive, so gentle. It might have been a rough slap to the face to make you go on killing spree. You, the more stable and loyal person I knew.
I never will know for sure, you're not alive to tell me anymore.
All I can do is supposition.
Maybe you were mad since the beginning.
Maybe you never been that loyal.
Maybe I didn't knew you at all.
I wonder if I ever did. I wondered for a long time, now. Ten years, huh ? Time flies, time flies…
Aaaand here I am again, venting and talking like a damn poets fossil. I'm hanging up. »
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From : Satoru
april 10th, 2018 at 8:00 am.
« Hey Suguru, it's still April. We've been apart more than together, it never was heatlhy wasn't it ? I loved you very much. Still do. Hope you rest well. Living is an exhausting concept. »
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From : Satoru
may 13th, 2018 at 10:00 am.
« It's may, Woah. New useless thing I'm saying apparently. Telling you the months, like you'd care. Anyway, Megumi look more like his father each passing days, it's so weird seeing kind eyes on a face like that.
I'm getting better. Thought I said it to you. »
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From : Satoru
may 24th, 2018 at 7:00 pm.
« I'm paying for your line, just to vent and hear two second of your voice every time I call. So gay. »
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From : Satoru
June 30th, 2018 at 7:00 am.
« It's June. I heard that there is a new place in Sendai that make matcha fukukumochi to die for. Might go on a mission there soon to try it. Did you knew about it ? I guess no. They opened in February, you were already dead. Time really don't stop moving, huh ? I wish it would. Give me a breather for sake. »
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From : Satoru
July 10th, 2018 at 6:00 pm.
« I wanted answers, explications, even if it was meaningless for you. I know it wouldn't have made me feel better. It might've even made it all worse. But it could have given me closure. Is it something you didn't think I deserved or needed for never giving it to me ?
Or you were just selfishly holding onto the fact that I could never let you go ?
Knowing that without any more word from you, I would still desperately waiting for them ?Knowing I would then never looking forward ? Always searching behind my shoulder looking for you ? Maybe. I don't know.
Maybe, you were relishing in the fact that the wound would never heal. Maybe. I don't know.
I don't know.
I guess I never will. »
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From : Satoru
July 11th, 2018 at 3:00 am.
« Hope you have nothing to enjoy in hell. »
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From : Satoru
september 2rd, 2018 at 8:00 pm.
« Hey Suguru, I didn't thought what I said last time. I hope you have everything you ever wanted, even in hell. I'm not so delusional to think you're in paradise even while wishing you'd be in it, you piece of shit. If these things even exist in the first place. »
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From : Satoru
semtember 13th, 2018 at 3:40 pm.
« We never communicated well didn't we ? I thought it was just me, but you were just as hopeless as me. I was just too obnoxious to see it. »
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From : Satoru
October 3rd, 2018 at 5:40 pm.
« Shoko think I was. Obnoxious it is. But she also think I was a kid too. What a strange thought to have. I never was one ? »
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From : Satoru
October 3rd, 2018 at 0:30 am.
« Oh I'm soooo traumatized it isn't even funny Suguru. Think you would laugh about it with me though. You were always the best. »
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From : Satoru
October 31th, 2018 at 6:00am.
« Miss you. »
