Surprise chapter for Angel Dust's birthday!
Husk groaned as he swung another bottle."This is going to suck." His deal with the radio demon made sure that Husk always had enough to gamble with … didn't mean nothing if Husk went over that bare minimum for what he thought was a victory by full house. And now he was in debt to the skull gang.
"Rough day?" Iruma, the kid he was stuck in this hellhole with, questioned as he worked on building up the wall of one of Al's destroyed homes. Something Al didn't even need to do or care about, but made them do anyway because he liked watching them work hard only for it to be destroyed anyways.
"Average day in hell, so it makes it a terrible day by earth standards." Seriously, how fucked up was Alastor to mess with a kid that really got the shit hand in life. Not just being fucked over by hell, but by heaven itself. "You've ever been to Vegas?"
"I've helped repair slot machines for a few of my jobs, and the one time I was told to deal a poker game.." The boy shuddered. "The worst part of angry gamblers is that they always have a glass of something to try and throw at your head."
"Mm. Well I sort of ran into a debt issue." He explained.
"Ah, someone you know lost one too many hands and treats you as collateral so you're forced to pay off the money that the casino is owed. I know the feeling." The kid said as if that was normal. "I don't have much, but since I'm working with I.M.P. I can spot you fifteen bucks."
That could barely pay for a bottle of booze. "Save it kid. That's not the type of collateral they're after." Husk groaned as he pounded away with a hammer. "The gang I've racked up debt with want drugs."
".. You know I've seen vending machines for that stuff. Aren't drugs like candy down here, since people don't overdose?" The kid asked.
"I ain't talking about the cheap shit like Meth or Angel Dust. That barely counts as aspirin in high doses." Pretty much all demons had a high built in drug tolerance, likely so the withdrawls would be more painful. "These bastards want the high class shit drugs from the sloth ring. Even if I wasn't broke as shit, I don't have anyway to get the dang things here."
"Why don't you just go there yourself?" The kid he was forced to care about asked.
"Can't get anywhere near the place for shit. You ever see a sinner demon walk out of the ring before?"
"... Okay, I don't want to sound mean or rude, but I JUST learned demons don't die when I got here, and I just learned about imps and hellhounds over last week." He stated. "If you're going to talk about hell facts, assume I know nothing."
He rolled his eyes. Great, just what he needed to be. A social studies teacher. "There are seven rings of hell, which function more or less like fucking continents. We're all stuck in the Pride Ring. The best drugs in all of hell come from the Sloth Ring. With me so far?"
"There's drugs in other countries?"
"Close enough." He rolled his eyes. "Sinners can't leave the Pride ring. We're stuck here. Demons like Imps and loan sharks though Rw free?"
"Okay, so it's like border control." The kid nodded. "Wait, then couldn't you just sneak through somehow? My parents had me cross the borders of other countries illegally all the time."
"It's one of the many, many cruel punishments forced by the rules of this realm, dear boy." The smiling red prick smirked creepily as always as he slithered towards them "All mortal souls damned to hell wind up in the Pride ring, and forced to stay within its confines for all eternity while the hellborn spread out and explore the rest of the world down below for the damned."
"Okay … so if you were born in hell you can go anywhere. If you weren't you're stuck here?" The kid asked.
"Ding ding ding, that's a smart chomper!" Nifty ran up the kids head and rubbed it, dangling a dog biscuit in front of his face. "Here's a doggy treat!"
"… I'm honestly pretty hungry now and dog food isn't the worst thing I've ever eaten." The kid at it out of the mini psycho's hand. "Oooh, bacon flavored." He couldn't tell if this kid even comprehended what pride was other than the basic vague understanding of it. "... You know, if you want Husk, I can try asking Moxxie to go get some, he seems like a helpful guy."
"Is that so?" The prick grinned. "Then Iruma, please get dear husker here the drugs he needs all alone without any help of your impish little friends."
"... Yes sir." He sighed, walking out the door.
"Somehow your even more of a Jackass when you're looking over a kid." Husk deadpanned. "I thought you didn't torture those little guys?"
"Not torturing something doesn't equate to not enjoying their suffering. As the radio demon, I enjoy the suffering of ALL denizens of hell."
"Also it's not completely foolproof." Nifty noted. "He has to say please, help me, or I'm begging you and lower himself verbally."
"A small price to pay for entertainment. As I always say, the show MUST go on!"
"I feel so special." The kid rolled his eyes, before pausing. "Wait, but I'm from earth. Won't I be stuck here too?"
"I have absolutely no idea!" Alastor let the laugh track play. "It's an experiment bound to be very entertaining! You may even splat if you try to leave! It's a mystery to be solved, and one you are vital, nay, essential for my dear boy!"
"… If I die, get me a drink Husk. I won't have to worry about the headache if I don't have to worry about surviving anymore." The kid grumbled as he walked out.
"I'll get you a glass with your name on it." He nodded as the kid left. "Seriously Al, you're a real peice of work, you know that?"
"Awww, is the kitty sad he's losing a friend to play with?" The bastard laughed.
"Fuck off." Just another shitty day in hell.
Iruma gulped as he heard the announcement. "All trains for Sloth are now boarding. Walk onto the trains with a pink line if you're heading there, fuckers." Somehow better than please.
Iruma may have not explored as much of hell as he should.. or read as much as he should about the place, but he was fairly sure that the way to basically get from one country to the next would've been more complicated… but surpringly, it was built like a train station. A golden and shiney train station, but a normal train station nonetheless.
Looking around as he walked to board his train, he saw a large variety of demons beyond just the imps he usually saw around Imp city. There were fish looking people, some droopy looking goats, hellhounds, and one woman with pink skin. It was like a whole new type of culture to explore.
The train doors closed as Iruma felt himself panic. This was it. If this didn't work, he would die, he would be crushed, he would-and then they moved … blindingly so. Faster than any bullet train in the world, but none of the motion sickness of G force one would expect.
"You're shakn baby boy." Iruma turned his head, swing a demon lady with red skin, red horns unlike the black and white ones he saw on imps, and little wings on the back that didn't look practical for flight.. and a really big chest. "First time traveling without mommy and daddy?"
"No. I travel alone all the time." He nodded. "Just my first time going to another ring. Kind of a new experience for me."
"That so?" She nodded with a weird looking smile. "So.. you're all alone?" She moved in closer to his seat right next to him.
"Pretty much." He nodded. He couldn't get anybody to help him due to what Alastor said, and the jerk wasn't likely to pull him out of trouble anytime soon. "I have to go on a drug run for a coworker. What about you?" Maybe a conversation would ease his nerves. Even if it was a stranger who would probably torture him for funsies.
"Pleasure and business all in one." She cackled, scooting closer to him, and iruma felt like a small animal being preyed on, but he couldn't sense where the danger was coming from. "I work in the lust ring. I got a few clients I need to suck on.." She giggled for some reason. "I mean, suck up to for my job."
"Ahh …" Given the comment on Lust, and sucking, she was either a cannibal or one of the women who hung out with sugar daddies … thank you for THAT little tidbit of information Blitz. "Surprised they use trains instead of something like planes."
"You're one of those sheltered types aren't you?" The woman laughed as she gave him a sniff. "Young and… inexperienced."
"No, I mostly spend my time outside and building my own shelter."
"Pffftt." The woman laughed for some reason. "Cute. They use trains because it's hell. There's nowhere to go but down." She pointed outside.
"Mm." He looked out … to the orange sky … "Wow …" Another ring. So he COULD walk to other sections of hell … did that mean he could move somewhere and not have to deal with Al? No wait, not only did Iruma not have a living space, he'd still get summoned. If the jerk could do it while Iruma was on earth, the same would apply to the rest of hell.
There were no loopholes here. Alastor owned his soul, and Iruma should be grateful that the dear demon didn't eat him upon first seeing him. The man WAS a cannibal after all. "That right there's Wrath." The woman smiled. "Sloth's all the way at the bottom. Long way down."
"Oh, so we're going to be here for a while huh."
"A little bit.." She grinned as she placed her hand on his. "We can keep each other… company till then."
Iruma looked at the lady and gently slid his hand away. "Yeah, that sounds good." At least she didn't look like she wanted to eat him. As long as she didn't force him to do something with please, he'd be fine. Who knows, maybe there's some sort of rule that stops people from going crazy on trains? "I'm Iruma Suzuki. You?"
"Im whatever you want to be, baby face~"' She leaned in, making Iruma move his head as her face hit the window.
"How would that work? Do you want me to come up with a name for you?" He scratched his head. "That's kind of hard. Never been too imaginative before." Was this one of those travel games people played to pass the time on long trips?
"… I can't tell if this is a turn on or a turn off." The woman muttered.
"Are you looking for a light switch?" He looked up. "There should be button for that somewhere."
".. Maybe I'm not the right bait here." The woman muttered, before turning her head to a buff demon behind them. "Hey Slax, I need you to work your magic on this kid here."
'Slax' looked at her, then the boy. "… Hey kid, are you interested in a fuck?"
"A little blunt, don't you think?"
"He's a teen, I don't think he understands subtly." The demon man looked to the woman, before going to him with a weird look, making his muscles bounce weirdly.
"… Huh?" Irum tilted his head.
"A fuck, do you even know what that is kiddo?" The guy asked. "You know, riding your broomstick, filling the pipe, doin the dirty."
"… You're using a lot of euphemisms I'm not getting." He said bluntly.
"Sex!" The woman shouted. "We're trying to have sex with you!"
"Aah … no thank you then." He shook his head. "I'm not old enough to have kids yet. And I'm not financially stable enough to support a family." Frankly he probably never will, which was probably for the best. He didn't want to be like his own parents and put that pressure on future generations.
"… Do you think that all sex leads to kids?" The man asked with a baffled look.
"Well yeah. That's what happened with the foxes in the fox den I hid in." He nodded. "And when I heard noises from my parents room I realized that they were trying to do the same thing. Probably just hoping they'd get another kid to be their slave and do all their taxes."
"… Do you want to talk about it?" The woman asked.
"Probably, but it'd take a while and my stop here." He saw the light labeled 'Approaching Sloth'. "Thank you both for the talk, you're lovely people." Iruma smiled at them.
"…. I feel so weird right now." The man said as he and the woman blushed.
Standing up, Iruma left the train, making his way to the door. He walked out into the pink sky, droopy looking city, taking in a breath … Oh man… the air here.. it felt…. Soothing… so relaxing… like someone was giving you a hug with every step.
"So … so light …" Like a cloud … oh he never wanted to leave … so relaxing… was the air made out of blankets.. he could fall asleep here and now and not even have trouble closing his eyes.
BEEP BEEP
Ooooh … shiny looking car-
CRASH
Angel Dust scoffed. "I thought Cherrie said this kid was lit?" Standing next to a radio to listen to the broadcast she was praising, all he got was some dull boy who didn't know a good fuck if it was in his own ass. This was the kid that supposedly got hell in a frenzy and took on a V? Maybe Radio wasn't as dead as he thought if people bought rumors like that.
"Alright, body's stabilized. It seems like he didn't get much of an impact." Some doctor on the other end said. One thing that got Angel invested was hearing the kid got hit by a bus. Other people's pain was always hilarious no matter what.
"Almost like his body subconsciously rolled with the force … at least it makes our work easier."
"Yeah…. We're still going to pump him full of drugs and overcharge him for it right?"
"Duh. I need a new yacht to put in my golden parking space.
"Wait what!?" The kid shouted.
"Shit, we didn't sedate him enough. Amp the morphine."
"No, Im fine I don't need this!" Noises or struggling and were heard. "I can treat myself just fine!"
"You got hit by a fucking bus kid, that's not exactly fine in ANY book!"
"But I get hit like that all the time!"
"All the more reason to fill you with drugs. Nurse, bring out the hellhound tranque gun!"
"The what now!?" What sounded like a cannon getting dragged in the room came next. "Ahhhhh!" The sound of rapid fire and running was heard next. "What kind of hospital is this!?"
"… A paradise." A world filled with the best of the best drugs that they willingly shoved into you before paying … amazing. Sure the debt would be a problem, but anything monetary price would be better than anytnkng Val would make him do.
"He's going into the vents! Use the gas!"
"We used all of that last week when were putting down that pissy Goetia for a cavity removal!"
"Then what do we have!?"
"Tasers."
"Wait, there's tasers in the vents-?"
Zaaaap
"Or was it lasers…?"
Peeeeeeewwww
"These are the worst vents I've ever crawled through!"
"If we can't bill this kid down, we're gonna be in big trouble for blowing the defense budget."
"Don't worry, I put a rabid weasel in the vents just in case."
"That explains why we've gotten so many imp patients with rabies lately."
"AAAAAAAHH!"
Following that was just a lot of screaming and banging, Nothin fancy. Seriously, what got everyone so hooked on this brat? Other than the comedy of errors, this was basically no different than mocking any fucking harlequin looking bum across hell.
"Hmm … wonder how good the drugs from sloth taste." Angel Dust muttered. His usual fixes were getting tame with how much tolerance he's built. And Val was raising the rent for living at the studio, probably so he'd have even less reason to leave the moth bastards side.
He was stuck between his vice and his contract. If he could just have a little more money saved up while keeping Val satisfied, then he could be on his way to have a slightly less shitty life in hell. … but it's not like there was any place cheep around.
Barbie Wire glared at the wall in front of her. "Why do they even have rehab in hell?" It made no fucking sense in all honesty. Stupid Belphagor should be more like Mammon … okay, maybe not Mammon. She'd seen enough of Fizzie's commercials to know that she didn't want any more of Mammon than necessary. Satan? Satan was a good choice. Big buff and tough son of a bitch with abs like steel. Oh wouldn't she be lucky to hit a dick like that.
The only reason she stayed in this place for so long was.. well, Barbie needed the help, as loathed as she was to admit it. She may have had one too many of her share in the devil's dusts… but in her defense, you needed to be on drugs if you were related to fucking Blitzo.
All it took was one too many fuck ups for Barbie to see that shit stain for what he really was. A monster that caused nothing but suffering for everyone around him, hurting people for fun and laughs. She told that fucker she never wanted him around, but he still showed up every other day, and the cycle of needing more time in rehab continued.
And the biggest fucking joke of it all is that maybe… maybe he could find it in herself to forgive him.. if he did it fifteen fucking years earlier and didn't shit the responsibility of killing their mother. The one truly good person in her life and Blitzo ruined it with his fucking bullshit.
There was no redeeming that monster. All there was left was her raw hatred and desire to leave that bastard to die. He didn't deserve mercy or forgiveness. All that was going to be waiting for him at the end of his life was a grave, and if she was lucky, no one would be cursed by wanting to visit it.
So until that day happened, she would keep her head low, and try to work her own shit far, far, far away from that as.. even if it was from this fucking droll and boring ass facility.
Barbie heard a rattling from the vents. "If that's the rabid weasel again I swear to Satan." And his gorgeous abs. Christ on a stick she wished she at least had cocaine for the headache.
The vents rattled as she was prepared to shank a bitch. "Ahhhhhhhhhhh!" And falling from it… was some blue haired kid with a fancy looking suit and a cowlick, looking burnt from serval angles. "Why are there lasers and tasers in the vents!? That's just a horrible fire hazard!"
"One too many pathogens." She shrugged. "So what's your deal squirt? Herpes? Cancer? Drugs?"
"Worse. Hospital bills." The kid groaned as he dusted himself up. "I got ropped into trying to help a coworker pay his debts by getting drugs, and that lead to be getting hit by a bus."
"I remember the first time that's happened to me." She snickered. "I think I was like… five when that happened. Cept I was the ones samplin the juice for myself." When it wasn't for her mom that is.
"Yeah, well I'm pretty used to getting hit, so I'm pretty good at taking care of myself." The kid looked out the door window. "I tried telling the doctors that, but they're insistent on pumping me full of drugs so they can overcharge me with medical bills."
"Healthcare. That's how Belphagor hooks you in." Barbie shook her head.
"Who now?"
She stared at the brat for a moment. "You ain't from around here, are you?"
"I'm from earth. And this is my first time outside the pentagram." The kid shook his head. "It's a long story that I don't have time to get into. The doctors are on my tail and my 'boss' isn't here to bail me out of a problem."
… Eh, she was bored enough. "Wanna break out together?"
"Really?" The kid blinked.
"I don't have the money for my bills either, and I'm sick of this joint anyways. I'll help you get out if you want it." This was the most mildly interesting thing that's happened to her in a short minute, and Veroskia was long gone out of here already.
"Sweet!" He smiled brightly, bright enough for it to be out of place in he. "You have a file on you? I tried the windows but they're pretty much bared off."
"It ain't the hospital's first breakout kid. You gotta think harder than that." She waved her hand as she lead him to the laundry shoot. "We'll climb our way down here. You go first, cause if ya slip I don't want a hundred and ten pounds slamming down my neck at fifty miles an hour."
"Understood." He grabbed onto the sides. "Hopefully they didn't add tasers into this place as well."
"There's a sixty percent chance they did." Barbie noted as she followed suit. "Luckily I have tolerance to that from my circus days. My old man would buy eels and force me and my brother to juggle them… that was my life for six years straight." Didn't help that Blitzo was shit at juggling.
"I worked at the circus too.. though I was less of an act and more of a prop." The kid huffed as she slid downwards. "I was the kid the snake from the 'man eating snake' act would eat every show."
"Ah, I've seen that one, a classic." She noted. "Is it true snakes on earth don't spit acid, can't eat cats, and don't have poison that can kill you in ten steps?"
"One, that's another terrifying hell fact I didn't know." The kid grumbled. "And two, yep. Though it's more like five steps. My parents once took me to a zoo to get bitten by all the snakes so I could have all the anti-venoms in my body when they sent me to jungles for exotic fruit."
"Seesh, I thought my old man was cheep." She winced. "Let me guess, shitty parents left you out to dry, and now you're stuck working odd jobs?" Barb summarized.
"Worse. They sold my soul." The kid rolled his eyes.
"Wow, here I am happy to be born an imp for once." She snickered. "Our souls are worth less than nothing around here."
"Lucky you, sleeping under the radar like that." He noted.
"I guess, of course that mean you got to work your ass off the rest of your life to prove that you're actually worth something.. and you try and try for decades, thinking you've made progress.. and poof, it all falls apart."
"I know exactly what you mean." The kid nodded. "I thought never asking for anything would mean people would appreciate me and the work I've done…. maybe I'd make a friend that could make me happy on the days I feel miserable… but it didn't work in the end… nothing ever works in the end. Everyone always wants you for something in the end, right? No one ever wants to hang around or help cause they care about you as a person."
"Exactly! At best, the closest thing you get is someone to drink with as you share pain, or someone who's upfront about exploiting you." Barbie agreed.
"My boss litterally tells me he's going to torture me daily, and I still count him as better than my parents cause there's no pretense of false hope."
"And the worst part.. you don't got family to help you pick up the pieces." Barb rolled her eyes with a groan. "When your life falls apart.. you got to glue the peices back yourself"
"True that … apparently there was an angel but she wasn't much help." He said. "At the end of the day, you only have yourself to survive."
"Jeeze, how the hell haven't you offed yourself with that much depression?" She questioned. Most of her days she was close.
"Oh, I don't feel that. It doesn't really help you live when you're always at rock bottom so I just kind of … stopped feeling that at one point." He sighed. "I can't call it hope.. but I can't call it depression either… some part of me just wants to keep living and see it through. Quitting now would be like telling my Parents 'hey, you were right', and I don't like doing that."
"Wow… five years of doctors and rehab, yet one kid cuts to the bullshit in five minutes." Barbi laughed. "You're not half bad kid."
"Considering how hell works, I don't think I'm half good either." He smirked.
"Ah, look at you getting jokes down." She chuckled. "You're gonna fit right in with us demon scum, and who knows, one day you might even like it."
"That or I'll passively live each day like I'm on autopilot." The kid nodded.
"True that." Alright, she managed to meet someone half decent in this dump. That wasn't much, but it was hers, and she'll take what she could get. "Name's Barbie Wire."
"Iruma Suzuki." He grinned back, before growling was heard. "... Hey Barbie?"
"Yeah Iruma?"
"If the snakes here are more acidic, vicious, and poisonous … what about the weasels?"
"Buff, fast, sharp teeth and they're basically born with rabies with the need to bite."
"... Climb back up. Climb back up!"
"Grrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaggghhhh!
Blitz was laughing at first when Mils wanted to check in on her baby boy. Listening to him fail to get seduced by some sucubitches, then getting drugged from the air was pretty funny. Then it was even more hilarious when he tried running from the bills, cause M and M already left to go help him, so nobody was around to stop him …
Then his sister came on the other end, and the laughter stopped. His sister … the only family Blitzo had left. The one person from his past that hated him probably more than Fizzie and Verosika combined.
"What …" Iruma's voice came out, panting. "What sadistic demon gave them three rows of teeth?"
"Probably Satan." Barbie's voice huffed. "Wrath's the ring where you'll find the most.. wild animals."
"Avoid wrath, got it … unless Alastor heard that and decided to send me there over and over … oh that's gonna be joyful." He muttered.
"Alastor, wasn't he that radio freak from a while back?" His sister asked.
"Yeah. He bought me from my parents to torture me for all eternity. My shadow's broadcasting everything that happens around me to every radio station cause it's 'entertaining' for him."
"Wow, now that's a shit hand." Barbie snickered. "Sorry, shouldn't be laughing, but.. wow, that's like.. the perfect tragic comedy."
"It's fine, not the worst reaction to said information." The kid noted. "So I'm gonna figure out how to grab some drugs I can't pay for then go back to my co worker. What about you?"
"A new life without my shit brother." That hit him in the chest.
"You have a brother? What's it like?"
"Horrible. The fucking worse." And that gaping hole where his heart was supposed to be got wider and darker with every word. "It's like being born with a leech on your back. Every bit of good you do is rendered mute by their bullshit, and everything theydo spreads to everyone around them and fucks their lives over."
"So just like parents."
"Even worse, because they don't just manipulate you, they're so deludedabout their ideas of love that they think their bullshit is okay and everyone can just get over it. Well, they don't, and if you're out there listening to this asshole, FUCK YOU! This is your ONE chance to stay the hell away from me, cause if I see you again , I will kill you."
"Yikes, sounds rough." Like you wouldn't believe … on both ends. "Well, good luck with that.. and thanks. You're the second nicest person I've met in hell."
"No prob kid. You're not an obnoxious little shit, so kind had to do something to help ya out." His sister laughed… Blitz wishes he could make her laugh like that again.. he wished he was the one in sloth right now.. making her happy. "Good luck with the soul thing.
Don't react don't react you stupid piece of shit. You know you deserved it. Why the hell would she go back to you? You didn't give her a single iota to even care about you, you don't deserve to wallow in self pitty together. Because you deserve to die.
