Until We Meet Again, My Mulberry

by Rusyda

Chapter 6 - Untied Knot


DISCLAIMER:

All characters from Gundam SEED belong to SUNRISE.

All characters are just fictional and not relatable with any real life people or even incidents. If do, it's just a coincidence.

The characters' speech and actions do NOT represent the ideals and personality of its original author or owner and merely act with intentions for the plot engine.

This fanfiction is more to OC x Canon as the main. Be noted the other ships might be the side ones.

GOOD NEWS for ASUCAGA fans: In this fan-fiction, Athrun and Cagalli are officially married. You heard me. They are husband and wife, legally. There would be no rivalry between their love anymore in this fan-fiction.


Knock! Knock!

"It's me, Rusyda. May I get in?" asks Finaz in worrisome of her soft voice, who is standing right in front of my room. I am the one who laying down on the bed, lousily getting up and repositing how I sitting in more proper way. Stroking my black short messy hair roughly, I am staring at the floor for nonsense, emotionlessly. I feel my body is quite heavy from leaving the bed, urging me to stay laying on the bed continuously, without any care about what happens around the people in the house. I feel like I want to sleep forever in the room but isn't that kind of selfish, stupid wish of mine?

"Rusyda? This is Finaz talking. If you would not mind, may I get into your room?" Her question, asking for confirmation from mine slaps me into the reality. Strangle in messy skittish action of mine for a sudden call out from Finaz, my phone is nearly thrown away from my hand grip. It is very, very lucky indeed when I manage not to let it fall to the floor in time.

"Rusyda?"

"Coming! Wait for a moment, okay?" I am quickly off from the bed, stepping closer to the door and opening it for her. "I am sorry for troubling you that much, Finaz. With the boys and I, I just really have no idea at the moment."

"It is fine. I bring you some tea. Would you like to enjoy together?"

"My pleasure. Just come in. My apologize for the messy inside," I express my regret for not tidying up the room more properly before letting her in. "I honestly don't know what to say. You came here from far just to help the boys and I. I'm left no word. I truly appreciate for your help."

"Don't mention it, Rusy," she says in soft subtle of her smile in the lips, while pouring the tea into the cups. "In fact, it would not let me sit in ease seeing theirs not properly manage. You okay, Rusy? You seemed like you were not yourself lately."

I sighs. She makes her anxious sight locks on me once again but a bit calm, I guess? As she looks way more less strict than previous one. Making my eyes change their sight direction from her to the floor. She is not wrong about that. I barely know who I am really is right now. I barely recognize her. Even looking at the reflection of mine in the mirror, it still does not help me regain what I truly know about me. About the real me. I even cannot bring myself into a proper self care lately. The boys? Don't mention it. It is worse than improper self care of mine.

"Lightia told me. You haven't in touch with her for a while. It's very unlike of you, Rusy, for not being in touched with your bestie. Why?"

"I... I don't know."

"How about Shinn? Still no news about him?"

"Nope. I heard none from him. Neither from them too."

"The longer I stay here with you, the more it is noticable," Finaz exclaims in her gentle smile. "You're truly loving Shinn, so deeply. That's what I can see from you."

"What? But I am not sure with my true feeling. I swear." So unlikely a part of me be honest with Finaz. About my current feeling towards Shinn. No doubt he loves me. It is just me being hesitated about my true feeling.

What if it is just a fake?

What if my feeling for him is actually fake one?

"Are you that unsure for yourself? The signs are shown obviously, Rusyda."

"As if what if my feeling for him is never enough for all this time. As if this feeling is fake after all. Maybe he notice that so, that's why he keeps distance from me."

"Rusyda, you silly girl," chuckles Finaz seeing how clueless and dumbness is Rusyda really is. "The way you care for him shows the clearest sign, Rusy. As clear as the beautiful blue sea at the beach. Your love for Shinn - I don't need to say how much it really is but it's countless. As countless as the sand at the beach."

"Really?"

"I can assure you that your love for Shinn is definitely reachable on his soul." Finaz takes her seat next to Rusyda and then makes her comfortable by laying down on the bed. "No need to hesitate, Rusy. Your feeling for him is legit. No fake at all."


"Me? Why me?" asks the young lady in long red haired known as Meyrin, in a little shocked face as she is confronting with Cagalli and Athrun, privately in Cagalli's personal office room.

Of course, Cagalli's personal request makes her shocked. So sudden she is requested by Cagalli with something that she would not expect to hear by her own. To approach someone that she barely knows. To approach and have some talks with somebody who is not that close in her life.

It sounds quite impossible for Meyrin herself as the person she is requested to approach is her ex-brother in law's wife, Rusyda. Meyrin and Shinn have never been talking to each other for long, long time ago. Right after Lunamaria left them behind. The one and only one reason she used to talk with Shinn is Lunamaria had been their mediator in closing their gaps together. In fact, she is being asked for having a chat with his ex-brother in law's wife making her in discomfort. No idea.

"Listen. I might not be the right person to get close with her. I'm not even that close to her. Even if she's my... ex-brother in-law's wife now?"

"I know."

"Apologize for my improper question but why do you guys see me as the right one to see her in person? I don't think I'm the right person to do it."

"She still insists to do nothing. Even until now, she's still the same. Even Lightia's sister is still unable to comfort her. Her stubbornness somehow resembles..." explains Athrun, letting his sigh regretfully while slapping his forehead.

The memory lane of him being with Shinn as Minerva's crew in few years ago comes across to his mind. Hot-headed and stone-hearted but very determined one - those words would describe about Shinn in his eyes. "Seems like they're truly going to make a very, very wonderful couple. You are such a great mentor in teaching her that side of you, Shinn. Great!"

Cagalli chuckles a bit, seeing Athrun is whining about that side of Shinn. Meyrin just could smile awkwardly, dropping her sweat while seeing Athrun whining about Shinn like that. It is not like she is not immuned to his reaction.

They both already know.

They both are already always aware of them not getting along well with each other. Meyrin already explained Cagalli everything about their how Athrun and Shinn both were interacting with each other in Minerva in their very own private girls' slumber party before. Deep inside, they both know that Athrun always show his care to him but in his own way even he does not tell everyone that. Kind of trying to be a tsundere kind of person but not really deep into that kind of personality.

To think about their dynamic, doesn't it sound like the real brothers would do, does it? LOL.

When they are right in front of each other, they keep fighting. Non-stop bickering whenever they are close.

When they keep their distance from each other, actually they care for each other in silence.

"You're funny, Athrun. Are you still not satisfied that part of him, huh?" Cagalli tries her best not to laugh. "Even until now? Your action always shows the obvious."

Meyrin who is standing there starting to chuckle a bit. Holding her laugh while witnessing his superior getting teased by his own wife.

Nothing is more entertaining and priceless than witnessing this side of him when being teased with his wife. To be real honest, that is what she has been witnessed this couple around. Maintaining their professionalism in public's eyes and yet showing their enjoyment in each other company just in front of very few of close people they know. That is including Meyrin too.

To Meyrin, it cannot really be helped then. Since she already feels their lovey flying in the air during she works under Terminal for so long time ago after a few months of the battle in Messiah happened.

She joined the Terminal after she was referred by Lacus to let her join supporting Terminal by contributing her specialization in tactical coordination and hacking systems while becoming an intermediary that linking the bridge to the all pilots as she is well-trained in delegating information to them.

She definitely already witnessed all of theirs. It is just like her additional routine that she really can't be helped then other than enjoying their drama for free. To Meyrin, this is just a part of her job. She already accepted it as it.

"He already changed to be better. He is already grown up to be a better man. Still, is that you trying to say you actually care about him?" Cagalli is smirking while looking at his emerald green eyes directly waiting for his responding to her question.

"Well... That's not how-"

"Well played, Athrun. I know you can't lie to me. Actually, you really care about him, right?" Cagalli and Meyrin giggle watching Athrun starts flustering so bad and frowning synchronously, as he does not really feel comfortable to open the discussion on his dynamic with his former junior in Minerva.

Athrun! Oh, Athrun!

You will never able to lie to these girls, Athrun. Forever and ever after. No matter how hard you try, Athrun, you'll never able to lie them. They already know you. Especially that certain blonde haired queen of yours, Athrun.

"But wait!" exclaims Meyrin as she interferes in the middle of their conversation but, in still shaky tones of her voice as she is in deep of a hundred doubtful inside. "T... Talking about her, as you briefly say, Finaz is still unable to comfort her in person, right?"

"Yeah. That's right."

"Not even Shyla-san or that Star Princess can help her? Well, I heard the Star Princess is her bestie since academy if I am not mistaken, right?"

"You're not wrong about the bestie part, Meyrin," Cagalli replies with a calm tone of her voice as she gets up from her seat. Walking to get near to the windows and leaning herself to the wall. "Not going to lie, I wish the same thing too. Hoping they'll meet in person and talk together but somehow, their given situation won't allow them."

"Cagalli-san, with all due to my respect for you, I honestly feel like I'm not that suitable person for this."

"With all my full consideration made, it's you are the one who has the closer relationship with her. Unlike both of us, Meyrin. To compare with us, it is you having that preserved bond with them both. Weren't you living together with them before this?"

"Yes, it's true that I am used to stay with them as a family, as a sister of theirs. I mean, I was the sister of theirs. I can't deny that but it doesn't make our bond is... real," Meyrin confesses in regret, making her in silence from any word for a moment. So do with Athrun and Cagalli.

It is still painful inside of her as she lost a person who shared the same bloodline as her. The one who was growing up together. The one who became the first person urging her to be more confident with her own self. The one who was always with her in up and down in life. Losing Lunamaria truly hits her harder, as much as it hit Shinn in past, in about a year and half before her ex-brother in law met Rusyda.

"Meyrin."

"I'm just an outsider to her, Cagalli-san. I'm rarely having a chat with him since the day we lost her back then. We're not talking that much after the moment we lost Luna. For years, you know. How could you come with-"

"How far are you that sure that you are just an outsider to her?" Cagalli intentionally tests Meyrin. Wanting to see how would she react and hear what would she say about her decision.

"But, it's true! I am nobody to her, Cagalli-san! It's impossible for both of us will ever get along well as you expect!"

"However, do you believe that you may remain the sisterhood if you wish to?"

"Ah..." Meyrin is stunned by Cagalli's question. The word of 'sisterhood' is the word that she is actually hoping to hear. The exact word she is longing to hear and missing to feel that once again, after for long time the death of her big sister. Meyrin who is still standing there, lowering her head and pursing her lips. Her right hand is forming a fist, as a result from her battling inside, with her own feelings and trying not show it clearly. "About that, you really have no idea about sisterhood means really is."

Yes, she's always longing for a sister's love for long time ago as she always feeling lost recently. Since it is way longer than she thinking before, she almost forgets the term of sisterhood is actually exist. For all this time, the one and only one way to make her be more sensible on reality is blindly undergoing any mission that requiring her skills.

Having Lacus and Cagalli by her side as her 'big sisters figure' actually is not enough for her to cope her loneliness inside as she knows they both are already in full hands.

Cagalli is with her current duty as Chief Representative of ORB while Lacus is handling her role as the president of the Compass.

Knowing this fact of Pinky Princess of PLANT and Lioness of ORB, she makes her mind not to trouble them any longer and proceeds with making herself busy helping them by doing her job like usual. Despite she knows it will not bring any good to herself if she insists to bear with her inner conflict. Even she is fully aware that will eaten her inside sooner.

Physically, she might look so matured, quite independent and very delightful one among them right now but, deep inside, she is dying inside. She always feels alone and lonely. She always has been enduring those such feeling as for the exchange, the gaps between her parents keep growing wider than she is expected, especially right after losing Luna.

Shinn is no longer talking with her for years after that.

They used to have their conversation because of Luna. Totally not because of Shinn's initiative, but it was Luna's after all.

It doesn't make sense if Meyrin would be the first person start her conversation with Shinn, as she already has bad image of him playing in her mind.

The moment that she helped Athrun to escape from ZAFT - she could not bring herself to forget they both were almost in the brink of their death flags as Shinn stabbed the cockpit of GOUF they were in, with truly dead serious on his face. Even until now, years passed after that moment, she still can't forget it. Which this was making her having more hard time to get close to him as siblings in-law after Shinn and Luna were married. She couldn't help herself from feeling so awkward to start her conversation with Shinn.

Starting from that point, her loneliness inside is growing bigger and much bigger than before. Having nobody to talk makes her loneliness inside worse.

"Really?" Cagalli asks for the confirmation of her words - Meyrin's words - as she turns herself confronts Meyrin. "I have no idea about sisterhood, huh? What do you understand about sisterhood in your eye, Meyrin?"

Hearing Cagalli's question makes her jumps into silence. Again.

"I always believe that sisterhood doesn't always have to be with somebody shared the same bloodline as we are, Meyrin. It can be someone you have nothing at all in your family tree but always be there for you in ups and downs. Someone that you are truly comfortable to share anything." Her subtle, comforting smile forms in her lips.

"I suggested you have a talk with her. I can see some similarities among you both. Just consider this personal request as your chance to tie the untied knot back with him," suggests Cagalli, remarks the end of their private meeting.


A/N: LOL. I make it again. Over 3K words counts for this chapter.

Anyways, I am purposely making Meyrin showing her inner struggles in this fanfic as I find it seems off so sudden she seems to be delightful one in GSF.

I have my hunch that Meyrin joined Terminal and ORB National Defense not because of her free will as her main reason, but I personally think it was Lacus proposing to Cagalli about the idea of letting her join Terminal after Lacus learning Meyrin's skill can be useful for Terminal as a non-governmental intelligence organization during her being the Chairwoman of PLANT Supreme Council.

Remember, Meyrin was wearing her ZAFT green uniform in Gundam SEED Destiny - Final Plus and this scene was added in Gundam SEED Destiny - Remastered version in its final episode - symbolizing her rejoining ZAFT. Anyways, this is just my fan theory. Unnecessary my fan theory has to be canon after all.

Hopefully you enjoy reading my fanfic! Thanks for reading.