There Are Worse Things Than Being a Caveman


Author's Note:

This chapter is M (or at least barely crossing the line over to M, I think), so if that's not your thing, hopefully, you enjoyed the first chapter, but the rest of this bit of smutty fluff is not for you. If you're so inclined, read on!


Walter watched intently as Paige toyed with a sandwich from the platter. He was fascinated by her every movement. Every bend of her wrist and curl of her fingers was graceful and exquisite, even without trying. She was magnificent. And he was completely and utterly enchanted.

Walter devoured his sandwich, surprised at how hungry he was after his turn pushing the lawnmower and defeating their ridiculously overgrown lawn. At the thought of the grass, Walter's eyes were drawn to the expanse of freshly mown green before them. He had not anticipated the distinct feeling of pride that would well up as he surveyed his work.

Perhaps some research into mammalian brain evolution was in order. Walter O'Brien did not enjoy being surprised by any facet of his life. The only exception was his extraordinary wife seated before him taking a sip of lemonade. She was a constant source of astonishment that never ceased to amaze and delight him.

Take for instance her current attire. Paige was by nature, a bit reserved and proper. She generally dressed conservatively with minimal though expertly applied makeup. She took no pride in drawing attention to herself, her natural beauty and charisma did all of that for her. Walter supposed some of her retiring ways had something to do with her childhood as Veronica's perfect accessory in crime and then her time working as a waitress being hassled by leering customers and occasionally having a patron put a hand on her, thinking she was on the menu as well as the steak and eggs.

The thought of another man, particularly a stranger whose attentions Paige would never welcome touching her was enough to cause Walter's blood pressure to jump to an alarming level. Without even realizing where Walter's mood had gone, Paige placed her lemonade on the table and placed her hand on Walter's. She smiled at him, that special smile that she reserved only for him and Walter felt his body calm almost immediately. He wondered if he had gone completely Neanderthal and if his IQ would suffer any ill effects from the experience.

But then Walter's thoughts danced back to Paige's lawnwork ensemble as his gaze swept up her legs toward her… His gaze stopped at the tank top she was wearing. It was so tight as to be indecent and he felt a drop of sweat bead up on his upper lip as he realized that she wasn't wearing a bra.

Another surprise from his usually modestly dressed wife.

Walter searched for any distraction to stop him from fixating on her chest. "Your thoughts seem to be far away, my Love, are you worried about the dinner party tonight?"

"Hmmm?" Paige dragged her thoughts back to her husband seated in front of her.

Walter drew in a fortifying breath, it was working, he was able to distract himself. "Are you thinking about tonight's dinner party?"

"Yes, just trying to decide if I should doublecheck with the caterers. It feels very extravagant. I've never done anything like it before. Every Scorpion Family dinner party before tonight has included beers on the roof of the Garage and Cabe cooking hot dogs on the grill." Paige toyed with the condensation running down the side of her glass and Walter swallowed thickly at the sight of her toying with the tumbler, wishing it was his anatomy she was running her fingers along. "I hope no one thinks I'm trying too hard. I live in this world of quirky geniuses, which I love, but I do want to keep a little bit of normal for myself, for my own sanity. Maybe even introduce some of the normal human world to the geniuses so they can experience it and hopefully fit in with other humans better someday."

Walter shook his head to clear it, keeping his eyes well away from Paige's wandering fingers. "That's an admirable goal. Remember, though, you'll have Allie and Cabe as well as Happy, Toby, and Sly, so that almost makes it even: normals to geniuses." Paige nodded, and Walter continued. "Everyone thinks the world of you, even Happy. I'm sure no one will hassle you-"

Paige interrupted him. "Even Toby?"

"Well, no, he probably will, but he won't mean it. You know one of his favorite pastimes is seeing if he can get under someone's skin. Just ignore any of his ridiculous comments and you'll be fine." Walter reassured her.

"Pretty much every word out of his mouth is ridiculous, so I should just ignore him?"

Walter shrugged. "It works for me. Ignoring him is the solid foundation of our enduring friendship."

Paige giggled. "While that may be true, I'm not sure that's great advice."

Walter smiled at her. She always cared so much about the geniuses and their feelings, even Toby's. It was what made her so remarkable.

They fell into another easy silence as Walter took a sip of lemonade. His attention was drawn once again to the revelation that Paige was wearing a tight tank top without a bra. He wondered why, it was most certainly not her normal mode of dress.

She had seen and admired his physical efforts at taming the jungle that had become their lawn and she had called him a caveman, albeit flirtatiously and as if she liked the idea. Walter pondered what that meant. He wondered if she was subtly encouraging him to embrace his inner primitive man in other ways as well.

That thought sent a rush of blood away from his brain and Walter shifted slightly in his chair to find a more comfortable position. Paige's eyes were drawn to the movement and a hint of a smile danced at the corners of her mouth. Walter continued to make his way through another sandwich and glass of lemonade. Had she noticed the direction his thoughts had taken and the way his body had reacted? He didn't think so, but he couldn't be sure, in matters of human behavior, Paige was a genius in her own right.

Walter poked at the crumbs piling up on his plate. How many sandwiches had he eaten as he observed Paige? He wasn't sure, but he surely didn't need any more food.

He was hungry for something else. Something that cold cuts and lemonade wouldn't satisfy.

Paige reached over and trailed her fingers up Walter's arm, she smiled and pushed the hair out of her eyes with her free hand. "I wanted to tell you how much I appreciate what you did with the yard. It looks amazing. Better than I could have done and in record time too. Ahead of schedule for the party tonight. I think we're safe to set up dinner out here on the terrace. I think it will be perfect."

Did she bite her lip as she looked at him? Yes, Walter replayed the memory in his mind. Was she flirting with him? Was she trying to drive him crazy on purpose? He didn't even care at this point if she was flirting with him or not, she had already shown him how much she enjoyed him tapping into his inner caveman and it was pounding painfully to get out.

Abruptly Walter stood and moved directly toward Paige. Her mouth formed a perfectly shaped 'O' of surprise as he moved toward her. He pulled her to her feet and pressed the entire length of his uncharacteristically unclothed body to hers. The feeling of her firm breasts unrestrained by lace and elastic pressing against him through only one layer of thin fabric sent another shock of desire directly to his loins.

Walter placed his hands on her hips and she wrapped her hands around his neck, pulling his lips to hers. He tasted the sweet tang of the lemonade on her lips, in her mouth, but that was nothing in comparison to the taste of her and the feeling of her trembling under his hands as he explored her lips with his tongue.

Paige moaned and writhed under the hot assault of his lips on hers, sliding her hands down the front of his bare chest, and then wrapping her arms around his waist. She leaned back to give him better access to her neck and he trailed kisses down toward her collarbone.

Walter felt the blood pounding in his ears as his arousal grew more intense. Without conscious thought, he moved his hands up the sides of Paige's torso, pulling her tight shirt up as he went until his hands cupped her breasts firmly skin on skin, one in each hand. His thumbs lightly skimmed the delicate flesh of her nipples, which hardened immediately into tight pink buds that Walter longed to taste and tease. But not yet, right now he just wanted to feel Paige in his arms as her desire heightened. Walter heard her sharp intake of breath as he continued to tease her nipples, still not giving up plundering her lips and neck with his lips and tongue.

"Walter," Paige breathed as his lips moved toward her ear, tasting each inch along the way.

Walter groaned as the need and desire in her voice heightened his arousal to an intensity he had not until this moment thought was possible. He was so close to the edge. He hadn't felt a level of excitement this high since his teen years. He hadn't even thought he still had the potential to be this aroused. It was this damn caveman mentality, tapping into his most primitive urges that had brought ever more simple appetites to the fore.

He suddenly wanted nothing more than to take her right here, right now, on the table in the backyard where any passing neighbor might see if they knew where to look. He knew it was wrong and inappropriate on so many levels but at this moment he didn't give a damn.

If Paige gave any sign that she was interested in such an amorous activity, he knew he would be done for.

"Walter," Paige's voice cut through his racing thoughts and brought him back to reality. "I-I want you, right now, I want you so much, but not here, not outside. I was fantasizing a moment ago that you were pleasuring me here right on the table, but as hot as that would be, I just… I can't. Let's go inside and get cleaned up instead."

Walter felt himself react to her words. She wanted him of course, but she didn't want things to go too far today, not tonight, they had that dinner party to think of. Walter swallowed thickly, dropped his hands, and arranged Paige's tank top once again to cover most of her torso. He understood what she was saying. He didn't like it and he wanted nothing more than to rearrange himself to a more comfortable position even as his desire fled, but he didn't want her to see him, for her to know how much she had affected him, to see how badly he had misjudged the situation.

Disappointed and embarrassed, Walter turned to gather the dishes and bring them into the kitchen.

Paige stopped him with her hand. "Leave it. We can deal with all this stuff later. Right now I want you inside, in the bath, so we can get cleaned up together." She winked.

Walter felt relief course through him. He hadn't misread her desire, he had merely misunderstood the colloquial use of the phrase 'get cleaned up'. He wanted her and she wanted him. Walter dropped the dishes on the table with a clatter and Paige grabbed one of his hands pulling him to her until his chest was pressed tightly to her back, then she placed his hand under her shirt and on her breast. She squeezed his hand as he gently fondled her nipple. She let her head roll back on his shoulder for a moment, before pulling him forward with her into the house, into their bedroom, into the bathroom. She didn't let his hand leave her body, even as she adjusted the water flowing into the tub.

As the tub filled, she turned in his arms pressing a brief kiss to his lips. She kicked off her shoes and Walter did the same. She pulled his shorts down and he kicked them away, then she stepped away and shimmied her shorts down her legs before turning to face Walter and removing the last bit of clothing between them, that gloriously too-tight, leave-nothing-to-the-imagination tank top that had started his thoughts down this path in the first place.

She tossed the piece of cloth away and stepped into the tub, pulling Walter with her. Together they sank into the swirling, deliciously hot water.


Author's Note:

There is one more chapter (I think, you never know until it's written), currently under construction. Given the way this evolution of a new side of Walter is going, it will likely be even hotter. Grab a cold glass of water if necessary!