CHAPTER 19: Sacred
"We are not a drop in the ocean. We are the ocean in one drop."
On their way to the bathing pond, the winding path meandered gracefully through a lush landscape of verdant foliage and delicate blossoms. The air itself seemed to hum with a quiet energy, as if holding its breath in anticipation of the coming night.
Birds twittered softly in the distance, their evening songs echoing through the stillness of the twilight hour. In the fading light, shadows danced and swayed, casting ephemeral patterns upon the ground as if performing a silent ballet in homage to the setting sun.
They had been walking in silence for a while now.
Nii was lost in thoughts about what had happened at the fire just before. She was not an energy bender. Right?
What was bending anyways? How do you know whether you are a bender or not?
She shook her head at herself.
No. She was not a bender.
She had been called many things during her lifetime.
Healer. Medicine woman. Shaman. Witch.
But not a bender.
That one was new.
She shrugged her shoulders and smiled to herself.
"By the way," Aang's voice suddenly sounded out next to her, breaking the silence between them. "I've been meaning to talk to you."
There was a softness and sincerity in his voice that had her turn her gaze to him. He was looking down as they walked, their pace slowing down just a little bit.
"I don't even know how to express myself properly. Um…" he tried while rubbing a hand along his neck. "What you did for me back there, last night. I was… It was…"
"Aang, you don't have to say anything. I'm just happy to…" Nii started, but he cut her off.
"No, I DO have to say something," he said with a slightly raised voice, before he stopped in his tracks, causing her to stop too.
"'Cause I don't think you know what it really means to me," he breathed in almost a whisper. "All my life I've carried that sorrow inside of me, by myself. As a child I tried to bury it, I HAD TO bury it deep within me, 'cause the world needed me to be the Avatar. I thought I was supposed to just detach myself from it."
He closed his eyes for a short moment before looking up towards the temple behind them.
"Which is actually also why I wanted to come here first, to the Eastern temple. I'd hoped that Guru Pathik was still here. He was the one who taught me to detach myself in order for me to have control of the Avatar State. I hoped…"
A pained shadow seemed to dance over his face, as if each line became etched with anguish.
"You hoped that he could help you detach yourself from the sorrow in your heart?" Nii asked in a small voice, reaching out a hand for him.
Aang looked at her hand for a moment before he took it into his, and wordlessly, he guided her towards some rocks nestled by the side of the pathway.
They both sat down, their hands still united. His hand felt cool against the palm of her skin.
"Exactly," he finally whispered. "And when he wasn't here… I just tried to do it on my own. But what I realized in the Spirit World, when you came and offered me a shoulder to cry on, I realized that if I detach myself from my past, I also detach myself from my presence. From my future. Then I just stop living in a way. And if I detach myself from my sorrow, I also detach myself from my happiness. If I can't feel lonely, I can't feel…"
He paused for a moment, looking at their hands that were clasped together as they sat there.
"Connected."
Nii felt a soft flutter in her chest, a gentle stirring that emanated from the very core of her being. With each beat of her heart, the warm sensation grew stronger, as if radiating outward in her body like ripples on a pond, touching every part of her body with a soothing embrace.
The feeling flowed through her as a warm, gentle wave that washed over her with tender affection and profound connection. She felt a sense of lightness, as if weight had been lifted from her shoulders.
"Thank you," Aang finally said, his voice carrying the weight of genuine gratitude.
The words were simple, yet they held a depth of meaning that transcended language, a heartfelt expression of the care she had shown him.
In that moment, there was a palpable sense of true connection between them, a shared understanding of the significance of their exchange.
Aang's eyes reflected a profound sense of humility and reverence, as he lifted his gaze to lock her eyes with his. In those eyes, Nii saw an ancient wisdom that transcended time and space, a depth of knowledge born from the experiences of countless lifetimes.
In the quiet depths of his gaze, she saw the knowledge of the ages reflected back at her - a timeless understanding that whispered of the interconnectedness of all things, of the eternal cycle of life and death, and of the infinite capacity of the human spirit to endure and persevere.
And as she sat there, looking at him, she knew that she was in the presence of someone truly extraordinary. All of the resistance that she had felt and all of her old ideas about the Avatar seemed to dissipate into the air around them, because in her heart she knew now. He did really carry within him a beacon of light.
He made her feel hopeful. Inspired. Wise. Alive.
"Thank you," she whispered.
They shared a moment of silence together, while the sun slowly but surely dipped below the horizon. In the distance, the first stars began to twinkle in the deepening twilight, their gentle light casting a soft glow upon the land.
The colors of the sky had gradually faded, giving way to a velvety darkness of nightfall. Yet, in this moment, there lingered a sense of magic and possibilities, a fleeting moment of beauty that served as a reminder of the nature of time and the eternal dance of light and darkness.
"I also wanna thank you," Aang said as he rose to his feet again, silently inviting her to follow along with his hand. "For whatever you did with my body. I still don't really understand what you did, but… I've never felt so connected with my body as when you massaged me. I felt so… alive. It was like I sort of met it for the first time. I dunno, is that weird?"
She heard his voice trembling and his breathing becoming staggered, but she could not help but to giggle a little.
"You know," she said as she watched the pathway opening up in front of them, revealing a rather large pond in front of them. "I was once taught by Guru Pathik."
"Really?!" Aang exclaimed in excitement.
"Yeah," she smiled at him. "And he taught me many things about life. The energy centers in the body, and how life energy moves through them. How we can sense it, and how we can manipulate it."
"Me too!" Aang grinned, seemingly excited that they shared him as a master.
"However," Nii said in a gaze through her eyelashes. "I did not always agree with him. Especially not regarding his philosophy of letting go of all attachment, physical as well as emotional, in order to connect with the cosmic energy of the universe."
She saw Aang furrow his brows out of the corner of her eyes.
"Other elders in my village did not agree with this either. I know that you're a monk, and that you've been taught to detach yourself from the body and its pleasures and desires to achieve true enlightenment and reach a state of pure consciousness, but… It might be true for you, but…"
She struggled to find the right words as to not sound like she was trying to discard his way of life or the philosophy of the Air Nomads.
"I was raised with a belief that the physical body is deeply interconnected with our spiritual well-being. I think the body is sacred and it's not some separate thing from spirit or soul, but a part of it. For me, my body is a sacred dwelling place for the divine that holds just as much wisdom as the universe itself. I am not a drop in the ocean, I am the ocean in one drop."
Nii did not look at Aang as she spoke, but she let her eyes wander over the pond that seemed like a shimmering expanse of crystal-clear water, framed by towering bamboo stalks and graceful willow trees. It seemed untouched by the passage of time.
She heard Aang breathe next to her. His hand felt warm in hers now.
"And so," Nii continued. "When you tell me that you felt like you met your body for the first time, that doesn't sound weird to me. I think you might be right. Maybe you did deepen your connection with yourself?"
He did not answer her. He just stood there next to her, seemingly immersed in the stillness of his thoughts.
She wondered what went through his mind, and how he felt listening to her ways of life. She still felt warm, though. Connected with him.
That is when she let go of his hand.
