Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters (except OCs).
QLFC Season 11 Round 1: Please don't spit on my feelings
Main prompt: Rogue Planets: These guys don't orbit a star; they drift across the galaxy on their own - Write about someone who chooses to follow their own rules, regardless of the consequences.
Additional prompts:
1. [Emotion] Defeated
2. [Trope] Unrequited love
Christmas 2023 Prompt:
1. (Emotion) Fury
2023 End-Year Prompt:
1. (Character) Antonin Dolohov
2. Rare pair
Word: 3000 (approx)
Warning: Mentions of pedophile and pedophilia (cradle-robber), foul language, slangs and insults (ie nincompoop, dunderhead, ignoramus, gormless, swines).
Dolohov sat on the sand as he waited for the most important woman in his life. He had arrived earlier than expected. This had been the place where Bellatrix and Rodolphus had their wedding. This seaside wedding venue where he had met the Dark Lord for the third time. It was the third time the Dark Lord had extended an invitation to him to join the Dark Lord's side in the war. The Dark Lord had been magnanimous despite the last two rejections, but Dolohov knew the anger beneath the benevolent facade. A third rejection meant that he would be regarded as one of the Dark Lord's enemies.
Dolohov looked down at his palms and sighed. He knew why the Dark Lord wanted him. He knew why the Ministry was keeping a close eye on him. He was only twenty-one years old, yet he had killed more than fifty people. He was not fussy about who he killed. He killed all of them regardless of their blood purity. If they committed an unforgivable crime in the eyes of his morals, he did not wait for the court trials to judge them. He simply hunted them mercilessly and sent them to Hades before anyone could interfere. He had no qualms about being the iron fist against evil. It was for the greater good, but the question was, what was evil? Only Dolohov's moral compass could answer that.
Dolohov rubbed his face tiredly. His most recent kill had been Tadius Nott, the pure-blood wizard was a depraved cradle-robber who hunted little girls. He had not been gentle when he julienned Nott into long strips similar to matchsticks. There was no doubt that the pure-blood community, especially the Death Eaters, hated his viciousness and brazen disregard for blood supremacy, honour and laws. Nott had been financing the Death Eaters' war, and his death meant a huge blow to them but did Dolohov care? Of course, he did not. He had been an absolute menace and a thorn to the Death Eaters and the Order of the Phoenix, but no one could deny that he kept the community safe and well-behaved. No one wanted to invoke the wrath of the vigilante. No one wanted to attract the attention of Antonin Dolohov. This made Dolohov the adored but necessary evil. Half the people in England wanted him locked up and dead because he was a serial murderer who took justice in his own hands; and the other half, while they adored him for what he did, they also shuddered at his cruel madness.
"It's okay if they hate me as long as this place that she loves is kept safe. Everything is worth it as long as she continues smiling," Dolohov muttered as he dug in his pocket for a golden ring adorned with rubies. He had finally saved enough money to buy the ring. He fiddled with it carefully and rubbed the engravings on the inner side of the ring: "AB and AD always." Tonight, he was finally ready to make his dreams a reality. Tonight, he would finally propose to her. She was the one he loved the most, and the only woman he could ever imagine spending the rest of his life protecting and cherishing.
"Antonin! Hey!" A beautiful woman with light brown hair and kind eyes ran to him. She waved her hand at him as she stopped in front of him and smiled tiredly.
Dolohov smiled fondly as he rose to his feet and gently tucked a few stray hair strands behind her ears. He caressed her cheek slowly with the back of his hand. "Hello, Andromeda, my princess," he murmured.
"Sorry, I'm late. Did you wait long?" she asked curiously as she looked up at her best friend. No matter how unhinged and bloodthirsty Dolohov seemed to the world, Andromeda could only see him as her most loyal friend. Only Antonin would stand by her side. Throughout their friendship, he had protected her, defended her honour, and shielded her from the derision of society and her family for her ardent refusal to subscribe to the blood supremacy ideologies.
"No, never when it's you that I'm waiting for, Princess," Dolohov denied gently as he gazed at her fondly. "I can't resent a woman for being too generous with her time."
"Oh, what nonsense, Antonin!" Andromeda laughed as she dismissed his teasing. "Don't tease and flatter me!"
Antonin's grey eyes softened and twinkled with amusement as they always did whenever he looked at her. He had been her friend since the first day they met on the train to Hogwarts. He had never planned to fall in love with the feisty girl, but somewhere along the line, he did. When he realised the depth of his affections, he wasn't shocked. He had been accepting of it. It was the answer he had been searching for. All the moments he spent wondering why he would always put her interests first had finally ended. It had filled his heart with joy and calmness to know that his love for her was the reason he always put her interests first.
After a long moment of silence, Dolohov held her hand gently. He stroked her fingers soothingly as he asked softly, "Are you happy, Princess?"
"I…" Andromeda's words trailed off. She held her breath. She had never seen Antonin look so vulnerable and gentle. She reached up and rested her palm on his cheek. "What are you asking, Antonin?" she whispered. She needed to know. Somehow, her gut was screaming at her to run. She needed to run now. Somewhere in her, she knew she wasn't ready for what was about to come but her curiosity demanded she remain still and listen to his next words.
"Are you happy, Andromeda?" Dolohov repeated his question. He watched her expressive brown eyes change from confusion to worry to fear to sadness to a hardened, stubborn stare. His heart pounded confused, worried and concerned. He wondered what could upset her so deeply. "Princess, what's wrong?" he asked carefully.
"Nothing is wrong, Antonin. I've realised that happiness is a luxury that not everyone is entitled to. I simply can't afford it," Andromeda admitted firmly. She snatched her hands away from Dolohov and slipped away from him. She walked a few steps to separate herself from him.
"Perhaps, it's not for everyone," he agreed. Dolohov was not blind and naive. He knew about Andromeda's conflicting position in the war. As much as she hated her family for their beliefs, she still loved them dearly. They were her family, her blood even if they ridiculed her for her choice in choosing her friends. He knew she was conflicted between family who had aligned themselves with the Dark Lord and her own principles that aligned with the Order of the Phoenix. The war was tearing her apart internally.
"Regardless of how this war shapes and what our future holds, Princess, you'll be safe with me. I'll keep you safe," Dolohov promised sincerely as he looked longingly at her back. "With me by your side, very few will dare to upset you. I'll be your sword against the scorns of society and your enemies. I'll kill them for you, Andromeda, if it would soothe your troubled heart."
"Tell me, Antonin. Do you enjoy being feared? Do you enjoy knowing people whisper behind your back in fear? Do you know the terrible things they spew about your slayings? Do you rejoice in killing?" Andromeda asked as she spun on her heel to stare down at the black-haired man. The more she looked at him, the more blurry his sight became. It was almost as if she could no longer see the person she used to know.
"I'll kill anyone who does not agree with me. There's no place for them in the future I want to see. It doesn't matter to me what the world thinks of me. Only the people I love matter," Dolohov answered calmly and honestly. It was just like him to face everything in a cold, detached, dispassionate way. "Why should I care about the opinions of those who don't know me? I can't and won't ever please them. I don't owe them a living; so, Princess, why should I care for their sentiments? Why should a tiger care about how the sheeps think of it?" he questioned her calmly.
Andromeda stared silently at the man. She should have known that would be his answer. He had always been like that. There was no one more stubborn and disciplined than Antonin Dolohov. He was not a soft man. He was never a man who could be moved by anything except his own will. If he had been a man who would fall for wealth and an immortal legacy, he would have taken a side in the war. Instead, he stalked through the war, killing people on both sides without a care. He held no sentiment or forgiveness for trash, regardless of the impact they had on the war. He was just a man cleaning up society into the future he desired.
"I'm not like you. I'm not brave and fearless like you. I'm not as resolute and unshakeable as you. I can't be like you," Andromeda sighed softly as she shook her head. Perhaps, it was not him who had changed. It was her. She had changed so much that she could no longer see Antonin the way she used to. The man standing in front of her was just somebody she used to know.
Dolohov closed the distance between them and pulled her into his embrace. He held her gently in his arms. He smelled her hair and murmured, "It doesn't matter. I never wanted you to be like me. I love you for who and what you are. If you can't be brave and fearless, resolute and unshakeable in your will, let me be your protector and shield. You'll always be safe with me. I would sooner die than let any harm befall you."
Andromeda's breath was caught in her throat. She felt her stomach drop. She should have run when her instincts screamed at her. She should have never come here. If only she had not been so willing to see him… This was the beginning of the end between them.
"No," said Andromeda firmly as she squeezed her eyes shut and pushed Dolohov away. "I can't."
"Are my feelings not enough? You know that I would be faithful to you, don't you? For what reason are you rejecting me? Rejecting our future?" Dolohov asked indignantly. He had not expected her to reject him so heartlessly and without reason. Surely, their friendship would demand some decorum and tact in rejecting his affections.
"I'm pregnant with Ted's child."
Silence stretched between them as grey eyes stared at her with absolute disbelief and shock.
"Pregnant..? What?" he echoed hollowly as he grimaced. He frowned and staggered back, wincing and flinching, aghast at her news. His face contorted with confusion, frustration, denial, and dismay. Andromeda could see him struggling with the news, struggling to comprehend her words, struggling to make sense of the inexplicable, unfathomable words. It was inconceivable! It was impossible! Andromeda was his princess! Dolohov clenched his shirt just above his heart as he looked up at her pitifully and helplessly.
"Why him? Why Tonks?" Dolohov croaked. He did not look like the wizard who boldly defied the governing laws and superpowers at war, or the vigilante who stalked the streets and hunted criminals simply because he felt it was the right thing to do, or the fearless man who waltzed into every place he desired regardless of the people in attendance. Dolohov looked shakened and weakened, as if he wanted to find a hole to bury himself forever. He looked like a man who did not know if he should feel betrayed, or mortified, or disappointed, or all three emotions. He felt worthless and defeated. He felt his heart dying and shattering.
"I love him," Andromeda uttered the words softly as she looked into the eyes of the man who loved her deeply and unconditionally.
"I love him." The words boomed repeatedly and tauntingly in his head. He could not believe it. He did not want to believe it… but he had no choice but to accept it. It had been words uttered by her lips. It was her truth. Try as he might, it was indisputable. She was truly in love with Tonks, and there was no place for him.
"What about me? What should I do with my affections for you?" Dolohov asked weakly as his shoulders dropped as he sank to his knees in defeat and hung his head. There was no winning. He was never in contention for her heart. He was always just a friend, never a potential lover. The truth was, he never had that special place in her heart. He was no match for Edward Tonks. For all his magical talents and intellect, his fearlessness and strength, he was never a competitor. From start to finish, Tonks had always been the special one and the king of her heart. From start to finish, Dolohov was the fool. The foolish boy who thought he could be the one… the foolish boy who dreamt stupidly.
Dolohov did not dare to look at anyone. Only the sand looked safe to look at. It seemed only inanimate objects would not humiliate him for his disappointed hopes and foolishness. He was just a stupid, foolish man in love with a woman who could never love him. The golden ring rolled out of his hand, abandoned in the sand just like his hopes and dreams for a future with her.
"Go… Go, Andromeda," he choked weakly as he fought back tears of devastation, despair, and heartbreak. He was such a loser, and damn Merlin, his heart hurt so terribly. Was this what irrefutable defeat felt like? His heart was in so much pain, misery, and anguish. He felt like drowning. He wanted to pull his heart out and put the shattered pieces together. He wanted to bury his inconsolable heart, embarrassment, and foolishness into the sand.
"Don't you dare appear in front of me again," Dolohov hissed, glaring at her.
Andromeda saw the grey eyes, and she felt a cold chill run down her spine. She had seen those eyes before, but they had never been directed at her until this moment. Now, she had the full attention of that vicious glare, and she understood the fear and terror his enemies felt when his visage was the last thing they would ever see. There was nothing kind and gentle in that malicious gaze. There was only a dark promise of absolute carnage and death. She finally saw the darkness and madness within the man she used to regard as her best friend.
As he glared at her, his grey eyes shone with deep pools of desolation, yet beneath that agony, there was an overwhelming rage. "Take this as my last token of affection for you. This is my last mercy to you. Take your family, take all those you love and flee from me, hide from me until the end of my life… because as long as I breathe, none of you will be safe," he warned her darkly. In choked melancholy, he watched the woman he once loved most flee from him.
He sat alone on the sand. He picked up the dirty gold ring and looked at it. He felt dejected, abandoned… defeated and humiliated in every conceivable way. All the false dawns and hopes… He had been so foolish to believe that he had a chance when the recreant was always the one she loved. A useless coward who worked as an unremarkable clergyman in the Ministry office. A weak nincompoop with poor magical talents. An absolute ignoramus. He lost Andromeda to a gormless man. How embarrassing and humiliating! The dunderhead paled in comparison to him in almost every way, yet he lost in the one area that was the most important: Andromeda's heart.
Dolohov would not allow his disgraceful defeat to a mudblood swine define his existence. He was still Antonin Dolohov, the man who sneered and laughed in the face of danger. He was the loose, wild card and fearless agent of death whose talents garnered attention from Dumbledore and the Dark Lord.
If Dolohov would not be loved, appreciated, and respected for who and what he was by the one most beloved by him, then he would not bother to be the hero of his own story and protect the future. He would be the worst villain and undo everything he once swore to protect. He would not be commanded and guilt-tripped to smile and behave when his heart was trampled and spat on. After all, the very fabric of his existence was his indomitable and defiant spirit to design and subjugate society to his unyielding will. He would make all the mudblood swines and their sympathisers suffer his grief and humiliation. He would shred at the flimsy seams of their society. He would be the nightmare that haunts their every sleeping and waking hour, and wash the streets with their blood. He might not be a horseman of apocalypse, but he would gladly be the weapon that eradicates their future into nothingness. Nothing mattered more than serving them their just deserts.
It was time to write his villain story, and Merlin, he did not care for anything or anyone anymore. He would teach the swines about his dark horrors and cruel intentions. If this meant he was on the Dark Lord's side, so be it. The end would justify the means. He would fight on any side as long as they learn to fear the monster that is hell-bent on their absolute annihilation. Those who dare to oppose him would rue the day they foolishly choose to challenge him. The hour for mercy was over.
Thank you for reading.
