Chapter XLIX
Lovely Insomnia
The kids took the opportunity to tease me, telling me how much this flower could make me "cute." It's nothing too bad, yet I cannot help but sigh to myself. Once outside, Naruto started clinging to my arm again as before and although he hides it from me, he sniffs my scent at times, making me very uncomfortable. I don't know if it's due to the flower in question, but I hope it's not related to something else…
I concluded it was time to take him home. Our group separated after a goodbye. Like last time, Shikamaru offered a fist bump to Naruto who returned it without hesitation… However, when Sakura offered him one, the blond pouted, looking away. Needless to say, his refusal hurt Sakura.
Along the way, I stopped at a shop to find more puzzles and fun toys that could keep the sapphire-eyed boy busy during his downtime. Stimulating his mind can only benefit him. Since he doesn't want to read, he should be interested in them since these objects overwhelmed his attention when he was in captivity. The veil of curiosity that covers his face implies an interest in my recent purchases.
With this flower in my silver mane, I look silly… Fortunately, the eyes gazing at us don't change very much. I don't detect anxiety in my student who subtly inhales my scent for dubious reasons. Of course, he stays pinned to me the whole way, which goes off without a hitch.
Surprised, but not surprised, Naruto started nodding his head once inside. Despite his dark circles and the accumulation of fatigue, he manages to chase away the exhaustion that suddenly catches up with him in a place where he feels safe. I could force him to keep his eyes open, but I'm afraid it's starting to take its toll on his body, which cannot rest at night.
I allow Naruto to go lie down—something he's quick to do when I give him the go-ahead, by the way. He rolls into a ball in the middle of the bed and covers himself with the blanket up to his eyelids. This time, even his ebony tail curled around him like a cat. Quickly, the blond sinks into Morpheus's arms.
Trusting his internal clock, I plan to let him sleep for two or three hours. In the meantime, I cook myself a meal after a few exercises and I finish by reading. I also dipped the flower in a glass of water which I placed in front of my bedroom window, next to my green plant that Naruto gave me three years ago. I thus avoid any misunderstanding; I don't want him to think that I got rid of it.
I watch over Naruto while taking care of myself; he's subject to nightmares during the hours of rest in the afternoon. To believe that this sleep is lighter than those at dawn.
This time, I remain vigilant when I wake up Naruto. Unfortunately, I don't even have time to touch him or say anything before he grabs me in his arms and drags me against my will into bed. I find myself on top of him and Naruto is on his back; my head is on his chest, my face is flushing and I hear the beating of his soothing heart. My legs are free of any biological ropes, but his grip is tenacious and far too sticky, though it doesn't take my breath away.
For fear that he will offer me another embrace of death, I tolerate this awkward hug by remaining still, especially since after slightly moving my arms, it tightened, grinding me in discomfort. I regret not having woken him up by pulling him out of bed… To add to my ordeal, Naruto suddenly started chewing my hair…
To say I'm exhausted would be a euphemism.
Not enjoying this embarrassing proximity and my hair more and more sticky with drool, I call out to the feral boy several times, gradually increasing the intensity of my voice. To my relief, he finally stirred, emitting a confused moan when I yelled his name. His arms release me and I hurry to separate myself from him.
To my misfortune and disgust, the wet locks are pressed against my forehead protector; a nasty drop of drool slides down my temple and far too close to my visible eye. I wipe away the excess filthy saliva covering part of my mane. I hardly repress a grimace by rubbing my hand in my sheets and thus, chasing the viscous liquid that sickens me.
I wonder if this sleep is more restless and active, in addition to being light. In the morning, Naruto barely reacts and continues to sleep, even when I leave the bed or try to get him out of it. In the afternoon, he's prey to haunting dreams; to that, fits of somnambulism that pushes him to capture me in his embrace, without realizing that he's suffocating me and breaking me in two. Having experienced the phenomenon twice, I sincerely believe it.
Naruto's mind is still somewhat numb. He's awake, both eyes in the same hole, although he remains lying down; the drool that escapes from his lips gives him a stupid look. I grab his arms, forcing him to sit. He bats his eyelids before grimacing in discomfort as he makes mouth movements. He sticks out his tongue from which he pulls out a long grey hair that he wipes in my sheets… My bunk is in dire need of cleaning. Naruto has behaviours that make me sick, especially his saliva in too much quantity and too often in contact with me.
It doesn't take long for the teenager to fully wake up when a floral scent overwhelms the full attention of his nostrils. When he notices the flower very close to him, he sketches a smile before approaching it to contemplate it with his sense of smell, since he keeps his eyelids closed. He briefly lays down on my headboard as he does so. At least he's awake and alert, although he occasionally yawns.
To pass the time, I take the opportunity to give him one of the wooden puzzles I bought earlier, a six-piece Star of Galilee that he has to put together. Unlike the book, Naruto seems much more interested in the latter. Although the day makes him slow and sleepy, not to mention his inability to stay focused for more than five minutes, he has set to work and is trying to figure it out. He lazes most of the time staring into space, but at least he's busy.
As for me, I was content to read the Make-Out Paradise while lying on the sheets. Fortunately, Naruto didn't enter my personal space by sticking to me in an unhealthy closeness, although he's sitting on my left.
Twilight pointing the tip of its nose, the blond settles on the edge of my window which he opened. Then, he tackles the puzzle more fiercely and he progresses at high speed. Despite these last few days devoid of similar challenges, Naruto hasn't lost his touch, and by far. Gradually, a veil of star-stained darkness engulfs the night sky.
Besides numerous breaks during which he seems to be daydreaming, he finishes the puzzle in less than an hour. Motionless, he stares at me intensely; his deep blue irises are so piercing that I feel uneasy, as if I were naked. His tail twirls and betrays growing annoyance. I finally understand what he wants from me after a few blinks.
Naruto wants me to congratulate him.
Like those times when he was in his jail.
He waits impatiently for me to comply.
Unable to disappoint him, I refrain from sighing. As soon as I get up, his tail wags with enthusiasm while he hardly holds in place; he's shaking so much he's excited. I ruffle his porcupine hair, which snatches from him silent laughter of a joyful nature.
"Well done, Naruto," I congratulate him with a smile.
The teenager gives me a similar smile. Glancing outside, I am bitten with anguish in spite of myself; the fall of dusk means that it's time to begin the feeding ritual that I must reluctantly submit to. It's a little early, sure, but if I don't do it now, this reality that I can't escape will torment me. This will increase my stress and my already too present fears.
Obviously, Naruto senses my emotions pretty quickly since he looks worried, while embracing my legs with his tail. I hardly know what to do to make him bite me without poisoning me too much; to that, I mustn't let him sink his teeth into his own flesh… With horror, I remember that my pillow in which he bit the day ago is stained with his sleeping venom… The damage is already done since I slept on it and rested my head on it earlier… My filthy bed begs to be cleaned as soon as possible…
Naruto is sincerely starting to disgust me … however, I have no choice but to take it upon myself to tolerate his atypical and off-putting behaviour. There is also his horribly foul body odour that soap is unable to alleviate. My nose can't smell anything else and all I can do is learn to live with it…
To calm myself down, I take a deep breath before returning my attention to the blond.
"I assume you're chakra hungry," I guess with a serious tone, crossing my arms. "I'll be honest with you. I don't know how to stop you from spilling too much of your venom and I strictly forbid you to bite yourself. Since pulling your hair isn't very effective, either we find another solution or you bite my pillow again."
Naruto observes the time of a breath the said pillow and grimaces exaggeratedly. Obviously, he doesn't like to sink his fangs into anything other than flesh… His refusal is clear and categorical, like when we wanted to collect his venom at the hospital. However, I don't know why he gave in yesterday. This contradiction makes me anxious and this icy gaze goes back to my mind, these eyes that weren't his… To believe that a malevolent entity was hiding behind these pupils veiled in unfathomable darkness. I don't want to meet this gaze of a very bad omen and wake up this dark side that hides in him again.
Nevertheless, whether he likes it or not, he will have no choice but to bite into something if no other solution is found.
In the meantime, I see that Naruto has lost himself in thought, pouting; he's thinking of a solution, that is understood. I know there's another way that includes his sensitive tail and I hope he doesn't offer it to me.
I don't need a Naruto with lustful ideas in this whole story.
No.
I wait patiently for the blond to finish thinking. His toes curl and uncurl as he peers out the window with no real visual target. After a few seconds, he gazes at me and looks me up and down. Then he frowns, putting on a serious and determined face.
He removes his tail from my legs before leaving the window. Without fear or anguish, he hands me his palms wide open to beg for my chakra. At first glance, Naruto trusts himself … but his voracious demons are still there; I know it, I feel it in my gut. All in all, witnessing his exuberant self-confidence, I want to believe in him.
"Are you sure of yourself?" I ask nervously.
As Naruto remains still and patient, his sapphire eyes begin to glow in the dark. His unusual behaviour makes me raise an eyebrow. He's waiting for me to accept, for me to agree to give him a chance. I hesitate a lot; I am too suspicious. However, a part of me wants to give him the opportunity to prove himself. Mechanically, I scan my dark eye over my scarred arms from his fangs.
"All right. I trust you, Naruto," I give in, offering him my left arm, which he takes gently.
My heart races in a mad rush, to the point that my chest is quickly sore. I cannot manage to calm down despite all my good will; a sincere fear that he will lose control of himself submerges me. Unfortunately, my student begins to hesitate while staring at me, thus prolonging this infernal wait during which I am dying of stress…
Without warning, his teeth suddenly sink full length into my flesh; in response, I gasp with a moan of pain. As Naruto devours my chakra, I notice that his eyebrows are furrowed way too much and he's holding my arm in one hand. He's fiercely pinching his thigh, probably to focus on the pain and therefore not lose his lucidity. I don't like him hurting himself, of course, but it's nothing serious. And if he hurts himself, he will heal this wound in a blink of an eye, thanks to the healing abilities of the chakra devourers.
When I start to feel that fire burning my flesh, Naruto pulls away. I gasp a few times as my bruised arm, which has stopped bleeding, shakes. Fatigue sets in and occupies my mind. Unlike the other times, these sensations aren't intense and I'm not obsessed with the idea of going to bed. The teenager managed to control himself and correctly dose his toxin. I can only be proud of him… However, he watches me in a funny way; his disturbing neutrality impossible to translate isn't at all natural…
Shrugging, I congratulate him, ruffling his charged hair with static electricity. In return, Naruto offers me his best smile … although his slightly hemoglobin-stained teeth make him look somewhat terrifying.
Aware that his venom will soon knock me out, I get changed while removing my bulky accessories. I slip under the covers, inviting the feral boy to join me. Although I'm on my back, he sticks to me to embrace me with all his limbs, resting his head on my chest. I'm getting used to the presence of his tail twisted around my leg and this intrusive closeness. At the very least, my face is no longer overheating; only my organ of love continues to panic for a few minutes.
Unable to push him away or fight against myself, I unconsciously wrap an arm around him, over his shoulders. This pushes Naruto to tenderly tighten his embrace which I don't mind.
Without further ado, I close my eye to let the train of dreams take me to its land of darkness, devoid of dreams and nightmares.
- XXX -
Ever since Naruto started poisoning me with his venom, I always fall asleep in record time. It's such that I cannot remember when I close my eye. While sleep is present, tries to take me with it, my mind remains awake. Not at all worried, I changed position by turning my back on Naruto who came back to stick to me; at that, his tail is still wrapped around my leg and my thigh.
I inhale deeply and calmly. I clear my head. The peaceful silence of the night is broken by the steady breathing of my student and the clicking of my dial…
Once again, I change position. I hear an inaudible complaint that I ignore. In addition to being unable to be comfortable, I find myself constantly tossing and turning in my bed; my movements disturb Naruto since he no longer sticks to me, including his tail which started slamming against the ground. I open my eyelid occasionally. Naruto imitates me to stare at me; his request that I stop moving around is clear.
Unfortunately, no matter what I do, I keep moving far too often. The fact that I feel trapped between the wall and Naruto doesn't help find comfort either. The irritation of not sinking into the arms of Morpheus begins to earn me sincerely, to the point that I escape rumblings in spite of myself.
I'm not used to having insomnia anymore. I'm supposed to be knocked out by his toxin spreading throughout my body. I'm so pissed off that I slap my hands against my face and rub my temples, then slide them into my silver hair. Glancing at my dial, I notice with horror that two hours have passed. In all this, my student isn't sleeping either; he's perfectly alert. Obviously, Naruto didn't pour enough of his venom into me, but that also means something else.
My body is pretty much addicted to it. Without his precious substance in sufficient quantity, dreamland avoids me like the plague.
Exasperated, at the end of my tether, I sit in my bed to contemplate the dark void in front of me. Once again, I press my palms against my face, arching forward. Heaving a painful sigh, I look at the blond who—in the meantime—has sat down. From his shockingly neutral expression, I don't know what he's thinking… I don't know why, but a bad feeling comes over me.
I don't want to be bitten again, but if I want to sleep, I have no choice. Whether I like it or not, my whole being has sadly become enslaved to his venom.
"… Naruto… I didn't think I had to ask you one day, but I need you to poison me with your venom," I whisper, offering him my arm.
My words take Naruto by surprise as he jumps. Moreover, I notice that he tries in vain to hide from me the anxiety that is devouring him; him holding his breath betrayed him, not to mention his toes bending and unbending.
Is Naruto not trusting himself? Has he ran out of poison given that his retinal avoidance reflects a certain "impossibility" to do so? I doubt; even if he empties his venom glands, his body has plenty of time to refill, ready to be dumped into the flesh with the next bite. To be frank, I find his behaviour a little suspicious … but knowing him, I have nothing to worry about. He must no longer be able to dose it properly as before. I am so desperate that I resolve to take the risk of sleeping too long.
"Please, Naruto. I don't know what makes you refuse. I want to sleep and without your venom, I'll have a sleepless night."
My pupil remains silent, although he gives me a fleeting look; at that, a cold sweat breaks out on his temple. He looks away. He refuses to bite me for dubious reasons.
"It's okay if you give me too much," I plead while approaching my arm closer. "Please, Naruto."
My plea causes Naruto to reconsider his decision as he delves deep into his thoughts.
"Naruto..."
To my relief, Naruto finally looks back at me before grabbing my arm after the time of a breath. His azure eyes don't glow in the dark as he sinks his fangs into my skin. Other than the pain caused by this unwanted intrusion into my flesh, I don't suffer more than that … until I feel that familiar ember heat spreading through my arm, of course. His toxin is slowly numbing my whole being and my head is spinning.
Quickly, Naruto pulls his teeth out of me. A few scarlet drops escape from these bloody holes on my skin, but nothing more. This kind of bite is perfectly tolerable unlike those intended for food. The sucking sensations pulsating in all my nerves, as if I were receiving electric shocks, and those of my strength leaving me… I cannot adapt to the pain…
All in all, sleep finally claims me, and the desire to go to bed occupies my exhausted mind.
"Thank you, Naruto."
Without further ado, I lay down, letting out a sigh of relief. As for Naruto, he sticks to me again to rest his head in my neck. As his hair tickles my face with its painless shocks, he wraps himself up with my arm, which he places around his shoulders like before. Too eager to sleep, I let him do whatever he wants. Nevertheless, his black tail isn't in my personal space for once.
I close my eye.
I finally sink into darkness.
