Chris's Recap:
"It's been a great many days/weeks since the start of this adventure! 24 teenage weirdos arrived in Crios Cath in order to go through a game of alliances, betrayal, and fighting for minimally effective camp resources as they pick each other off one by one, aiming for the million dollar grand prize! Only 9 are now left standing! Alison, The Filthy Rich Chick; Cherry, The Circus Girl; Ellie, The Bubbly Cosplayer; Gabriel, The Politician's Son; Gran, The Unlucky Magician; Mirai, The Two-Faced Fighter; Monica, The Loud & Proud Strategist; Phooko, The Innocent Smartass; and Watts, The Underestimated Nerd! They've burst through a gauntlet of challenges created and inspired by the contestants of Total Drama Zero Sum, the season that kicked off the Nui Kaua Trilogy, and now their teams are merging into a single unit! No longer will they be competing for team safety. Up until the very end, every challenge is to be played as an individual! We're approaching the final hurdle of the competition! Who will come out on top, and who will buckle under the weight of responsibility? Find out right here, on Total! Drama! Niiiiialasach!"
*Total Drama Theme Song Plays*
As the song starts, various cameras come out of the flora and fauna all around the island.
Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doing fine, you guys are on my mind
The camera zooms around all of Crios Cath before finally entering into the Nialasach Ruins.
You asked me what I wanted to be and now I think the answer is plain to see,
Aaron is on his skateboard, skating through the ruins, and as he moves forward, Claude can be seen following him, cleaning up the dust left by his skateboard tracks so that he can clear a path for Monica, who smiles at him, but ends up rolling her eyes, annoyed, when she's sure he isn't looking, and begins to pay attention to another part of the ruins, which the camera then shifts to.
I wanna be famous
Watts is looking over Erin's shoulder at an experiment she is working on, and she seems to be attempting to hide it from him, when the ruins wall explodes, causing Erin to fall back into Watts's arms before shoving herself out of them, the two then look over to see that the explosion was caused by Ash accidentally triggering a tripwire. She smiles and waves in an attempt to make the situation less embarrassing for her.
I want to live close to the sun
Camera switches to show Alison sitting on a beach chair and relaxing before waves come crashing in and ruin her clothes. She stands up with a huff and takes the beach chair further inland, but the same event happens, and she appears to let out a scream.
Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won
Camera shifts up to reveal that Simon and Arnold both saw Alison's ordeal, and while Simon starts to snicker at it, Arnold begins to flamboyantly tell Simon off, and Simon plugs his ears and walks away with rolling eyes.
Everything to prove, nothing in my way, I'll get there one day
Camera shifts to Upper Ceol Fields, where Zaiyrin is seen showering Cherry with all manner of gifts and compliments, and Cherry somewhat scoffs at them before blushing with a smile once Zaiyrin leaves and heading over to Ellie to talk excitedly with her about it while Ellie is working on a costume.
'Cause I wanna be famous
Rashi and Phooko both see the events with Zaiyrin, Cherry, and Ellie, and quietly laugh to each other as they both tend to a small garden of growing plants, with Phooko's plants looking quite healthy, and Rashi's plants looking unnaturally perfect.
Na na nananana nanananana na nanananana
Camera shifts to the Glas Woods, where Raul and Vanessa are sketching each other with smiles. Camera first hovers over Raul's shoulder showing a brilliantly done sketch of Vanessa, then switches over to Vanessa's shoulder, where a sketch of Raul can be seen, but Vanessa needs to keep adding wolves to the sketch as they crowd around Raul like he's part of their pack.
I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous
Mark is playing music in Cailleach Bog, but immediately rolls out of the way of a falling tree, he looks over to see an almost seething Mirai, who turns to him and begins to smile sweetly as she begs him to play. Mark is a little nervous at first but as he begins to play, Mirai begins to cheer peacefully as the camera shifts to Lower Ceol Fields.
I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous
In Lower Ceol Fields, Donny and Gabriel are engaged in a rather heated argument, and Christa and Jenae both walk up to Donny and Gabriel respectively, Christa tries to comfort Donny, but he begins arguing with her instead. Meanwhile, Jenae begins to continue to argue with Gabriel, but he stops her when he notices she's moving her hand down his chest.
As the other contestants whistle the rest of the tune around the Tine Naofa Bonfire, Gran and Zaheen both attempt to make the fire grow larger. Upon Gran's attempt the fire blows up in his face, causing Zaheen to snicker as she pulls off the trick perfectly and the flames begin to form the season title: Total Drama Nialasach.
Location: Upper Ceol Fields
Contestant(s): All Remaining
The Final 9 all gathered up at a location that horrified every single one of them. A rickety, hastily built, and somehow already worn down wooden theme park, heavy on a carnival theme.
"This…this better not be the merge camp." Ellie despaired as the remnants of the final Team Ebisu arrived to where the final Team Hayaji already stood.
"It most certainly is not, island gods be praised." Alison responded. She paused as she looked up and down the team. "Why is the detective gone, and why is the brute still among you?"
"Excuse me?!" Mirai huffed.
"To play devil's advocate," Cherry joined in. "Mirai is quite clearly more physically adept, and we are merging. It's been fairly public knowledge since early on that this is when it would happen."
"Guess I'll never find out what was going on with Aaron then." Watts sighed. "He seemed very interested in talking with me. What I do want to know, however, is why Erin is gone?"
"I'll happily take the blame for both departures." Monica smiled, twirling her medal around her finger. "Needed to thin out the numbers of the other teams, you see."
"It's impressive that you haven't had to use that medal yet, as well." Gabriel noted.
"Oh, is it?" Monica smirked. "Thanks for the compliments. Either way though, if we are merging today, I suppose now it'll be everyone for themselves. Interesting to see how many of you haven't just been two-faced this entire time."
"Everyone has, obviously." Cherry shrugged.
"I haven't!" Gran spoke up.
"I don't count you." Cherry crossed her arms.
"Maybe we can all settle down for a bit?" Gabriel suggested.
"Yes, that'd be for the best." Phooko agreed. "We can all go back to being at each other's throats after we learn what we're doing…here." He gestured to the nightmare carnival before them.
"I can answer that!" Chris announced as a horrifying carousel of what looked like someone who'd never seen a horse's best attempt at a horse based on the descriptions of a rambling drunk sprang up to life. "Welcome to Saga Park!"
"I hate it." Alison shuddered.
"Well, considering it's the sight of your very first merged challenge for individual immunity, I'd say that's a good feeling to have! Well done, Chef!" Chris turned to Chef, lying face up on the floor of the carousel.
"I worked…all dang night, man." Chef barely got his words out.
"Aren't we, like, allowed a karaoke song first?" Watts wondered. "I've already got a few options lined up if anyone wants to-"
"Hey, hey, so do I now!" Phooko motioned for Watts to hold up. "We rock-paper-scissoring this or what?"
"You guys will have plenty of time for karaoke after I explain the challenge to you!" Chris smiled. "Because it'll be lasting all day."
"So there's no…no actual celebration?" Gabriel wondered.
"This is ridiculous, we're at the single digits now!" Gran groaned. "We should get the chance to celebrate at least!"
"You'll have to make time for it on your own, I'm afraid." A young woman's voice announced from behind them.
Standing in her school uniform, Helen Lang had nine young children in tow behind her.
"Hello everyone." She smiled. "I'm Helen Lang, and I'm very sorry."
"S-sorry?" Ellie raised an eyebrow. "For uh, what exactly?"
"I had another idea for a challenge in mind, really, I did." Helen sighed. "But the kindergarten where I'm helping out was offered a strangely large anonymous sum of money to send me and their 'troubled children' to the island for the week I was supposed to be taking off to host for you all. With that in mind, I've revised what I had planned. I have nine kindergartners here, and there are nine of you. Your challenge for the day is simple babysitting. The child you are assigned will rate you privately at the end of the day. The highest rating will win the right to choose two personal luxuries out of the 16 you have been using. The second highest rating chooses next, and so on. However, if you are the unlucky player to rate the lowest, then I'm afraid you'll be sent home. The power to eliminate is no longer in your hands." She turned towards the nine children. "It's in theirs."
"Fuck." Gran cursed.
"He said a bad word! He said a bad word!" One of the children tugged on Helen's skirt.
"Good luck." Helen warned everyone. "Chris will read off which kid you're looking after. I…I'm going to rest."
Challenge: Babysitting
Rules: Each contestant has been given one child from Helen's kindergarten class to babysit for the day. The highest rated babysitters win the right to choose luxuries for future use earlier, while the lowest rated babysitter will be ejected from the game. How the contestants spend the time until the day ends is up to them.
Alison's child: Melanthios "Thio" (M)
Cherry's child: Odd (M)
Ellie's child: Alphege "Alphy" (F)
Gabriel's child: Kain (M)
Gran's child: Lisette (F)
Mirai's child: Elchanna "Anna" (F)
Monica's child: Matteo "Matt" (M)
Phooko's child: Fionbarra "Fiona" (F)
Watt's child: Hajime (M)
Location: Saga Park North End
Contestant(s): Alison (Thio)
"I'm gonna climb the coaster!" The snot-nosed kid shouted at Alison as she did her best to ignore him.
"Have fun then." She took no steps to stop him from his actions. If he got hurt, it was his own fault, she presumed. Instead she took the time to herself to analyze her situation.
Confessional: Alison
"I don't know if Monica is truly behind this recent Aaron vote, but whoever the mastermind was, they have bloody angered me. Aaron was the one person in this whole damn cast who I didn't mind working with, and now they've gone and voted him off! Now I'm well and truly alone with no allies. Jenae had to be stupid enough to get blindsided and take the Sword Medal with her, so I don't even have that to rely upon, and to make matters even worse, my trump card, my trap meant to bury that nerd James in his own depression, it was fucking undone immediately after I sprung it up!"
End Confessional
"Miss Alison! Miss Alison!" Thio had somehow managed to get his clothes caked in mud despite everywhere around seeming perfectly dry. "Miss Alison, my clothes are bad! Clean them now!"
He took off his shirt and threw it at her.
Alison quickly dodged out of the way, making sure none of the mud got on her person.
"Do not throw your dirty clothes at me!" She snapped at the boy.
"You're not Miss Lang! You can't tell me what to do!" The boy shouted.
Alison sighed as she reached into her jacket and produced a hundred dollar bill. "This is a candy allowance that you'll earn if you just behave for me."
Thio's eyes widened. "Wow, Miss Alison, you're the best!"
"Yes, yes I am." Alison smirked. "Now let's bring you to a river to get your clothes washed."
Confessional: Alison
"There is…there is one thing I do have going for me. I'm a free agent here. I'm alone. This makes me much less of a target than anyone in a group, or someone with a medal. And as long as I can squeeze by this next tiny bit… I'll win this contest. Then again, we all knew I was going to win from the beginning."
End Confessional
Location: Saga Park West End
Contestant(s): Cherry (Odd), Ellie (Alphy), Gran (Lisette), Monica (Matt)
"Hmm…" Cherry stroked her chin as she eyed Monica and Ellie in the distance as they both actively played with their children, while Odd sat around just picking his nose.
Confessional: Cherry
"Monica still has her medal, and that is something which worries me. It should also worry Ellie, yet the two of them are playing with their kids as though they are friendly neighbors. I cannot understand it. Does she not fathom that Monica's idol is a powerful weapon? Only rivaled by our own. We must flush that weapon out as soon as we are able. If this wasn't a sudden death challenge, I would be campaigning right now for it. In fact…perhaps I should be campaigning now for it."
End Confessional
"Odd…" Cherry put a hand on the kid's shoulder. "How would you like to go exploring?"
"No! I wanna stay here!"
"Will you stay here if I go exploring?"
"No!"
"Well, you'll have to pick one."
"I pick both!"
Confessional: Cherry
"Oh…he's that kid."
End Confessional
"Alright then, guess you don't like having fun." Cherry pretended to wave goodbye as she began to walk out.
"W-wait for me! Miss Cherry, wait!"
Shift Camera Focus
"Well…" Monica said as she picked up her kid and backed away from Ellie. "Looks like Matt here is getting a little tired, so I'm going to find a spot for naptime."
"Are you tired, Alphy?" Ellie asked.
"1 more hour!" Alphy was not yet tired.
"Then I suppose we'll part ways for now." Monica smiled. "Later~"
Confessional: Monica
"Will I win this challenge? Maybe. Will I come in last? No. Not a single chance that happens. I take care of 'problem kids' all the time back in my hometown. Though frankly my hometown isn't rich enough to label any children as problem kids. Anyways, I'm feeling confident going forwards. I have no allies, I've taken credit for the Ebisu eliminations, as I deserve to, obviously. To top it all off, I still have my immunity medal. I'll be sticking around for a while yet. I just need to make it to the Final 5, I'd say. Ideally, with two opposing alliances as well. Then I can swing-vote my way to the finale."
End Confessional
"Ellie." Gran walked up to Ellie as Alphy went to go play with an incredibly bored looking Lisette. "We've got some talking to do. Cherry has been keeping me uh…informed… about the goings on and stuff of the group you guys are in. I just want you to know that I am here as a vote."
"I…" Ellie took a while to respond, as she was taken aback by how direct Gran was being. "I appreciate it."
Confessional: Ellie
"To tell the truth, I'm completely flushed for allies right now. If Cherry has managed to rope Gran back to us, then I might as well take what I can get. I don't see Mirai working with me in the future, and while Phooko and I voted together against Aaron, now that a common foe is out of the way, I don't think he'll be looking to continue working with me either. Ideally, we can get Watts back on our side and hope we can break the Final Four, but I'm just…I'm uncertain about that too."
End Confessional
"And for what it's worth Gran…" Ellie spoke up. "Uhm, I'm sorry about how things worked out on Inari."
"Hey, it's in the past." Gran patted Ellie's back. "Let's look to the future instead, yeah?"
Confessional: Gran
"But that doesn't mean that I'm going to just forget or forgive what happened. My first and only loyalty right now in this game is to myself. I like Mirai and want to keep her around. And I'm glad Cherry sees me as at least a useful vote, so I'll keep her even if she's the most annoying bitch on the planet. But I have no connection to Ellie. None that matters anyways."
End Confessional
"You two." Cherry rushed up to both of them. "If we're all here tomorrow…I have a proposition, and that is an all-out assault against Monica's idol."
"The idol?" Ellie clarified. "Not Monica herself?"
"No. The idol. Getting rid of the idol is the goal. Getting rid of Monica if she doesn't play it would be a nice bonus."
"Like a scorched earth deal?" Gran wondered. "We all pile the votes on Monica and just…let her vote someone off if she catches on."
"That's the plan." Cherry nodded. "Figured she wouldn't target us anyways. Probably a Fudo member."
"That's a very bold and reckless plan." Ellie worried.
"I'm cool with it." Gran shrugged. "Gets rid of that medal she's so fond of hiding behind, and we won't win if we don't take a shot."
"You could always try a magic trick in her vicinity." Cherry snarked. "Your explosion might damage the material or get her medically evacuated."
"Well, I'd like to avoid being medically evacuated myself!" Gran protested.
"You've come this far at least." Cherry relented. "Counts for something, right?"
Location: Saga Park (Central Area)
Contestant(s): Ellie (Alphy), Watts (Hajime)
"Watts." Ellie approached Watts as he played a very bare-bones game of hide and seek with Hajime. Alphy clung to Ellie's shirt. "You have a moment?"
"Hajime, you feel like playing with Alphy for a while?" Watts bent down to ask Hajime face to face.
Hajime slowly nodded before he and Alphy rushed into some wheat to play something neither Watts nor Ellie was sure of, but their high pitched squeals of delight were enough to know that they were still there.
"I'm actually glad you're here, Ellie. I've had some stuff I wanted to tell you and things to ask you about as well."
"I uhm…" Ellie sighed. "I need to apologize. Mirai was getting to both Erin and I over on Ebisu with her constant fighting and campaigning for Aaron, and because of that, we switched our votes to her, and Aaron saved her with the Fish medal, eliminating Erin in the process."
"You…turned on our alliance member because she really wanted someone outside of our alliance gone?" Watts rose a confused brow.
"Thankfully, we were able to get rid of Aaron at the last Tine Naofa ceremony." Ellie continued. "But that's only because Monica betrayed him. She's good at playing many sides. We can't let her get much father, especially with her medal."
"That's information, alright. Thanks for sharing." Watts sighed. "And while I want to gloat about how logically you could have gotten rid of Aaron earlier and saved Erin in the process, and how you might have also managed to get Monica to waste her medal in that situation, I'm in no position to give lectures on how to play the game."
"What do you mean? Cherry is still around."
"But so is Alison. I had the ability too. I could have gotten rid of her, but I didn't. I wanted so badly for our alliance to be the one to do it, to recreate a moment I really liked from the original Zero Sum, but…well it turns out all the writing I've been studying in the cabin has been her own doing. You heard her song last challenge. And now she's free to wreak havoc in the merge, where individual immunity is what matters. Unless she somehow is taken out by this sudden death challenge, we won't be rid of her…and we don't have much time to get rid of her either. If I had just consistently played more emotionally like you told me to, she'd be gone and I would be blissfully unaware of the truth behind all the strategies I've wanted to employ."
"Well, at least we both managed to cripple the original Ebisu team a bit with Rashi and Aaron leaving." Ellie suggested. "And I know we didn't do very well at keeping our group together. I doubt Mirai will ever want to work with me ever again. But if you don't mind, I do want to continue working with you. What do you say to joining Cherry, Gran, and I?"
"Three Inari." Watts laughed. "I'll join on one condition. Gabriel needs to join too."
Confessional: Ellie
"Gabriel eh? He's….a bit of a problem though. He's well rounded and likable, and as Watts so helpfully demonstrated just now, he's got Watts attached to his freaking hip! It's too dangerous when I'm still not convinced that Gran will stay loyal to me and Cherry to get into the final three."
End Confessional
Confessional: Watts
"I've trapped Ellie in a bit of a corner with this request. She either has to let Gabriel in on the plans of this new alliance, because my song last challenge was real. I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure we get to the finals together. She has to do that, or she has to avoid doing it, which lets me know to warn Gabriel about this Inari alliance, and it puts her and her allies in jeopardy. Alison won't help them. She's digging for gold, and as long as Gabriel is the richest one here, she has a vested interest in keeping us around. Monica might help them, but she's already told me that they don't trust Monica and that she needs to go very quickly.
Mirai won't help them after her time on Ebisu.
"That leaves Phooko…and Phooko…well…"
End Confessional
Location: Saga Park (South Area)
Contestant(s): Gabriel (Kain), Phooko (Fiona)
As their children threw rocks at the wooden structures, never doing much damage on account of the fact they were children, Gabriel and Phooko relaxed on a picnic table's bench.
"It's been a while, man." Gabriel smiled. "We haven't really gotten to talk to each other since the Freya challenge, have we?"
"It really has been a long time." Phooko laughed. "But hey, I'm glad we got a chance to talk to each other again."
"Same here, same here." Gabriel nodded.
"Yeah." Phooko stretched. "Especially considering I'm on thin ice with that most recent elimination."
"Oh no!" Gabriel sat up. "Surely, it can't be that bad! You're in the merge now. I'm sure Watts wouldn't mind if we brought you along with us. From what I understand of the finales recently have all been Final 3s, so from there we can have a no-holds barred competition and make sure at least someone good wins the money and not uhh… Alison."
"While we're on the subject…" Phooko sighed. "I understand that she'd use the money for a good purpose, but I'd really rather Monica not win either. There are many ways to go about raising money to help revitalize a town. Coming onto a reality TV show probably isn't the best."
"I won't make any judgments on her character." Gabriel relaxed. "But I don't agree with her methods of play. So, if possible, I would also like to see her defeated. I don't need a whole million dollars. I'm sure most of us would be willing to donate some of the money to her town if it's in as bad a condition as she makes it out to be."
"Yeah… hopefully I can see it happen before I'm annihilated." Phooko joked.
"Wh-why would you be?" Gabriel hid a laugh. "You haven't done anything as far as I'm aware."
"I've made a never-ending string of mistakes is what I've done." Phooko sighed. "I didn't make my suspicions of Aaron more public quickly. I didn't put in effort to keep both Simon and Gran on my side during my time on second Inari. Then, I put my trust in Gran to keep Rashi safe so we could team up with Mirai at the merge, but he couldn't keep her safe. And then, I had to turn on Mirai to not be outcast by what I thought was a majority alliance, but I ended up outcast anyways when Erin went home instead."
"You know Gran actively voted Rashi off, though, right?" Gabriel asked. "It was a 4-2 vote. I was the only one who voted for Alison with her."
"Oh, WONDERFUL!" Phooko rolled his eyes. "The person I thought was my ally is actually yet another traitor. Honestly, the fact that I'm still here feels like something of a miracle."
"Miracles can happen." Gabriel patted Phooko on the back. "I wouldn't have thought we'd be able to reunite like this all this time later, y'know?"
"Yeah, there's that, I guess." Phooko smiled, looking up at the sky.
"In my experience…" Gabriel also turned to look up at the sky. "It's believing in yourself that's what matters the most. Even if you make mistakes, as long as you act with conviction, you can be proud of the game you played."
Confessional: Gabey-baby
"Phooko is a good guy. He seems to have the same general sentiments that both Watts and I have right now when it comes to the game at large. Let's get as far as we can, but if we can't, let's at least make sure someone deserving will take home the money."
End Confessional
Confessional: Phooko
"Gabriel and, from the sound of things, Watts too… They might be the saving grace I need here. There's a whole slew of other factors, but I'm entirely without allies. While I doubt I'd ever sever their connection to each other, if I had to lose to anyone at this point…I'd want it to be them. Can't say any of these other people really do it for me."
End Confessional
Location: Saga Park (West Area)
Contestant(s): Gran (Lisette), Mirai (Anna), Phooko (Fiona)
"Gran!" Mirai exclaimed as she and Gran reunited with a bear hug.
"It's great that you're still around too!" Gran exclaimed back to her.
"Yeah, but we have a problem." Mirai exhaled, annoyed. "We can't trust Phooko for shit. Nor should we trust Ellie. They tried to vote me off back during the Final 11."
"And Rashi over here was throwing challenges." Gran shook his head. "Cherry's also acting shameless enough to ask me for help now because they don't want to rely on team Fudo. Even after all the shit I've been put through."
"We're going to have to work super hard then." Mirai determined. "We'll brute force our way to the final 2!"
"Yes!" Gran pumped his fist in the air. "We'll make sure all these schemers get what comes to them!"
"Yay! See this is why you're my number one here, Gran!" Mirai laughed as she brought him in for another hug. "You get me."
"Aheheheh…" Gran laughed nervously, turning red. "I-I'm glad to help."
"I'm bored…" Lisette grabbed Gran's shirt.
"Why don't you play with Anna over there?" Gran pointed to where Anna was drawing circles in the dirt.
"She's boring too."
"Miss Miraiiiii!" Anna called out to Mirai. "Lisette won't stop picking on meeee!"
"That's not true!" Lisette huffed.
"Yah-huh!"
"Nah-uh!"
"Yah-huh!"
"Nah-uh!"
"Yah-huh!"
"Nah-uh!"
"Yah-huh!"
"Nah-uh!"
"Yah-huh!"
"Nah-uh!"
"Yah-huh!"
"Nah-uh!"
"Yah-huh!"
"Nah-uh!"
"Yah-huh!"
"Nah-uh!"
"Yah-huh!"
"Nah-uh!"
"Yah-huh!"
"Nah-uh!"
"Yah-huh!"
"Nah-uh!"
Confessional: Gran
"Gahhh, I hate kids, especially kids like this. But I like Mirai, and she's counting on me, so I'll endure through these little gremlins."
End Confessional
Confessional: Mirai
"Woohoo! Reunited with Gran, my island bestie, and it feels good to have someone who actually has my back for a change. Now, all that's left is to steamroll through the merge!"
End Confessional
As Gran and Mirai sadly left each other to their devices to avoid their children fighting, he and Lisette came across Phooko and Fiona.
"Must be good to be reunited with your ally from our final 4 deal." Phooko confronted Gran.
"I'd have loved to get here with your ally too. The problem is, she was only your ally, not our ally."
"Well, she would be if we were all fucking here dude!"
"Fucking here dude!" Fiona repeated.
"Don't swear in front of the kids! They'll repeat it like idiots!" Gran motioned to Fiona.
"Hey! Fiona's smarter than you, idiot!" Lisette huffed.
"Treat kids with respect, dude!" Phooko retaliated against Gran. "What I want to know is why the hell did you vote her off? I heard from Gabriel that he was the only one who voted for Alison. Why did you change your plan?!"
"She was helping Aaron, you lovestruck dingus!" Gran's volume increased. "And don't like that you didn't try to vote out Mirai in the final eleven either! Clearly, you're the one who is too impulsive here!"
"You, of all people here, have no right to call anyone else too impulsive!" Phooko put his foot down. "I'm just here to let you know that you were the first to burn this bridge."
"And you made no attempt to rebuild it just now." Gran pointed out. "I'm not the one that came at you with a passive aggressive accusation from a non-existent moral high horse."
Fiona and Lisette waved sad goodbyes to each other as Gran and Phooko too stormed off in opposite directions.
Location: Saga Park (Central Area)
Contestant(s): Mirai (Anna), Watts (Hajime)
"Hey there." Watts sat down by Mirai as Anna and Hajime played some version of tag that involved hopping on one foot. "I want to get the information from you, since right now, you're the only one coming over from Ebisu that I really trust. Why was Erin eliminated?"
"Ohmygosh, Watts, you have no idea how fucked it was." Mirai shifted excitedly. "See, I thought we were all just going to vote Aaron out, right? But then freaking Ellie, Erin, and Phooko all voted for me! I'm only here because Aaron played the Fish Medal on me and sent Erin home instead. So then, yesterday, when I try to give Phooko his well-deserved payback, Monica turns on Aaron and she, Ellie, and Phooko vote him off! You really shouldn't trust anything they say. They turn on their allies way too often. But now that you've brought up strange Tine Naofa ceremonies, why the heck is Alison still here?"
"Truthfully?" Watts sighed. "She duped me. A big enough deal was made about Rashi helping the other team in challenges that it left me worried about an original Ebisu alliance, especially given her general challenge performance. I can assure you though that Gabriel and I are planning to get rid of her as soon as a good opportunity presents itself."
"I hope so." Mirai crossed her arms. "At least now that it's individual, it'll be harder for her to hide behind immunities. And hey, after she's gone…I have a suggestion."
"What's your suggestion?" Watts raised a brow.
"Well…my ideal final 4…" Mirai smiled. "Would be me, you, Gran, and Gabriel. After we get rid of the obvious people, Alison and Monica, would you two be willing to team up with us against the other three?"
"I'm open to it." Watts nodded. "But I'm going to talk with Gabriel about it as well. Like you and Gran, we're trying to navigate the chaotic merge waters, and I don't want to make any decisions without him there for it."
"See, that's why I trust you." Mirai smiled. "You keep things calm and honest and from the heart."
"Not always." Watts looked up at the sky. "Until very recently I was playing super secretive with all my plans, trying to emulate the games of the people who inspired me to even sign up. I'm hoping the open-ness will help signify the new start. I'm not going to play a game to be like someone else. I'm going to play a Watts game. Not quite sure what one looks like yet."
"I'm sure it looks very cool." Mirai beamed. "And a Mirai game looks like winning challenges so don't think you can go easy on me when we get to the final four!"
"Ha!" Watts laughed. "I could say the same to you!"
*BEEEEP*
"Attention contestants, and little kids!" Chris's voice announced from a helicopter overhead.
"Please gather at the Tine Naofa Bonfire for the results of the challenge, and the subsequent merge ceremony! Unfortunately, only 8 of you will be able to attend!"
Watts and Mirai looked at each other, and looked at their kids.
"If it's a bonfire, Mr. Watts," Hajime questioned. "Will we get smores?"
"If you behave, I'll ask Helen on your behalf." Watts smiled.
"Miss Mirai, can we roast weenies?" Anna asked.
"Only if you behave yourself." Mirai warned with a grin.
Location: Tine Naofa Bonfire Challenge Results Ceremony
Contestant(s): Alison (Thio), Cherry (Odd), Ellie (Alphy), Gabriel (Kain), Gran (Lisette), Mirai (Anna), Monica (Matt), Phooko (Fiona), Watts (Hajime)
"I'm glad to see everyone is back and unharmed." Helen smiled as she corralled her kids. "Now the children will go and discuss amongst themselves who they view as the most effective caretaker. When they are done, I'll go down their rankings from the very top the the very bottom. If your name is called, you will be able to choose two Camp Luxuries from the list of sixteen to be yours to use until your time on this show comes to an end. The very last place on the list will be forced to enter the Tomb of Shame."
Confessional: Gabey-baby
"A whole elimination ceremony before the merge party…and it's decided by little kids…great…"
End Confessional
Confessional: Monica
"I'm not worried. I know how to handle kids, and I especially know how to handle 'problematic' kids. If anyone should be worried, it's someone like Cherry. Kids don't respond well to bluntness or being disrespected. Like most people. I'll never get why so many don't understand that."
End Confessional
Confessional: Alison
"These snot nosed brats better not mess this up for me! I want to live a life of luxury on this island and not be stuck with scraps!"
End Confessional
Confessional: Ellie
"I…I think I'll be alright. But knowing that the fate of both Cherry and Gran is in the fate of kids they probably didn't make the best impressions on is extremely troublesome for the plans I've been making all day."
End Confessional
Confessional: Watts
"I confess I don't know much about child-rearing, as I've never sired any children, and don't plan to at any point in the near future, but I'd like to think that I'm safe."
End Confessional
After a couple minutes had passed, Helen returned from a nearby tent with a list in one hand, and a platter of medals on the other.
"I have the final list." She announced. "If I call your name, please come up and receive your honorary merge medal. I have eight here. If your name is not called, then I am sorry, but you placed last in the challenge, and have been eliminated, meaning you will have to enter…" She motioned. "The Tomb of Shame."
"Oh just read the votes already!" Alison scoffed.
"I am getting there!" Helen snapped. "Patience!"
She looked over the list.
"Our lucky winner….
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… Is Ellie."
"Oh wow!" Ellie smiled happily as she went up to receive her medal.
"And for your luxuries?" Helen asked as she cocked her head toward a nearby chalkboard. "Simply cross off the two you wish to own."
"Well, the choice is obvious for me." Ellie smiled. "I'll take both Breakfast and Dinner."
"Some things never change." Helen sighed under her breath as Ellie crossed off her chosen items. "Our second placer is…
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… Alison?"
"Hah, fuckin' right it's Alison!" Alison stood up victoriously. "And you know what?"
She grinned at Watts deviously. "I think I'm quite fond of the Cabin and the Mattresses for my luxuries."
Watts let out a disappointed sigh. "That won't work anymore. Save yourself the embarrassment."
"Moving on…" Helen decided to not give whatever she was witnessing any moment to develop into an argument. "Third place is… …
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… Gabriel."
"Oh thank the island gods." Gabriel sighed as he stood up. "For my luxuries….I think I'd like the Outhouse….and the Chicken Coop."
"Good choices." Helen nodded as Gabriel crossed off the luxuries. "We're off the podium now.
Fourth place is…
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… Watts."
"Woohoo!" Watts pumped a fist into the air. He looked at the chart.
"I came into this game wanting to play a certain way, and I paid the price for it." He informed Helen. "And in order to move past it, I'm going to choose the Hot Tub and the Towels as my luxuries."
He looked over at Alison.
She glared back at him angrily.
He smiled.
"What's the matter?" He asked innocently.
"You did that on purpose." She growled.
Confessional: Watts
"Yeah, of course I did it on purpose. Because while I might not get to play the game I set out too, I now know that she cares about the events of Zero Sum as well. Enough to use them against me. That's my path forward. Here's to a future where the winner won't be a copycat or a spiritual successor, but someone who played their own game. And hey, hopefully it's me."
End Confessional
"Fifth place…" Helen continued. "Is…
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Cherry got up, and quickly chose the Shower and the Charcoal for her camp luxuries.
"So someone's grill won't work." She made sure everyone knew on no uncertain terms. "No need to give them the ability to speed-cook their food."
Confessional: Cherry
"And because Ellie took both food options. I can't let anyone else easily get to her level in terms of diet. We'll need at least a couple immunity wins going forward, after all."
End Confessional
"Sixth place…" Helen continued. "Is…
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… Monica."
"Much, much lower than I expected." Monica shrugged. "But I was never worried. I suppose the fact that everyone above the rest of us is more well-off has something to do with it, but I knew I'd still be here. I think I'll take the Fishing Spear and the Snorkel as my luxuries. There are many rivers and lakes on this island, and I'd be a fool not to make use of tools to traverse the waters and hunt the food."
Confessional: Monica
"And now that I am in the merge, I'm that much closer to that million dollars. It's only a matter of time now."
End Confessional
"Seventh place…" Helen looked down the list. "Is Mirai."
"OH YEAH!" Mirai shouted happily as she danced up to the rest of the merge, grabbing her medal. She looked over at the board. "Huh…I guess I'll take…Water Bottles…and the Canoe!"
"Take good care of that canoe." Helen laughed. "It's been through quite a lot!"
She turned to Gran and Phooko. "Gentlemen…this is the very last medal of the night."
Gran and Phooko looked at each other.
"At least we don't have to worry about going after each other." Phooko noted.
"Our rivalry ends as soon as it begins. In the hands of a bunch of toddlers…" Gran sighed.
"This last medal…" Helen announced.
"Goes to…
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… Phooko." She motioned for Phooko to come up. "The Grill and the Couch are your luxuries by default. Gran, unfortunately, you and I share a placement now. Congratulations on 9th place. You got into the single digits out of 24 contestants and that is something to be proud of."
"It really is." Mirai nodded in agreement.
"And I am proud of it." Gran sighed. "See you guys. Good luck in the merge!"
He waved to everyone as he left for the Tomb of Shame.
Halfway there, a small explosion knocked him down, causing everyone to look over in worry.
"I'm okay!" He called as he got back up and dusted himself off. "Was busy holding it in so I didn't do it in front of the kids! Later!"
"And let me congratulate you all again, final 8." Helen smiled. "For making it as far as you have. Your Merge Campsite can be found back down in the Cailleach Bog! Go ahead and enjoy your one shared karaoke song for making the merge!"
*Gran's Final Confessional:
"Well, I placed 9th. I'm really pissed that somehow Cherry and Phooko both got further than I did, but I'm glad that Mirai is still there at least. I hope the plan to flush Monica's medal goes according to plan, and I'm absolutely rooting for my girl Mirai to win! I guess I can stomach Ellie as a distant second choice."
End Confessional*
Location: Cailleach Bog (Merge Campsite)
Contestant(s): All Remaining
The karaoke machine started to play the song that the Final 8 had managed to agree upon after an hour of discussion and continuously telling Alison that her doing a solo song was off the table.
Ghost Ship Of Cannibal Rats by Billy Talent played.
"Respect!" They all shouted.
"Is never given enough today!" Mirai sang. "I'm tired of looking the other way."
"Respect!" They shouted again.
"An appetite that we can't sustain!" Cherry sang. "We're on a mission to kiss our days away."
"So how long before the rivers start to rise, dear?" Gabriel sang.
"Yeah I thank my lucky stars to be alive here." Phooko sang as well.
"Respect!" They all chimed in.
"A generation of castaways" Monica sang. "Under a nation of tidal waves."
"Respect!" They all repeated.
"Are we the passengers or the prey?" Alison sang. "You can't escape from the past on holiday!"
"So how long before the rivers start to rise, dear?" Watts sang.
"Pack your bags because the tide is getting high" Ellie sang as well.
"Don't be afraid of the view from economy class!" They all sang at once. "It's just the captain and crew jumping off of the mast! All aboard on the ghost ship of cannibal rats! All aboard on the ghost ship of cannibal rats!"
"Who's gonna sound the alarm when the bridges collapse?" The women sang.
"Is this the point where the bomb reaches critical mass?" The men sang.
"All aboard on the ghost ship of cannibal rats!" They all sang again. "All aboard on the ghost ship of cannibal rats! Respect!"
"Catastrophic events don't change!" Mirai vocalized. "Today we feast, but tomorrow we pay!"
"Respect!" They all shouted.
"But don't you worry cause you'll be safe!" Monica sang. "I got a ticket to piss your days away!"
"So how long before the rivers start to rise, dear?" Alison hummed.
"Yeah I thank my lucky stars to be alive here." Cherry continued.
"Don't be afraid of the view from economy class!" Watts sang.
"It's just the captain and crew jumping off of the mast!" Gabriel sang.
"All aboard on the ghost ship of cannibal rats!" They all sang. "All aboard on the ghost ship of cannibal rats!"
"Who's gonna sound the alarm when the bridges collapse?" Phooko sang.
"Is this the point where the bomb reaches critical mass?" Ellie sang.
"All aboard on the ghost ship of cannibal rats!" They all sang in unison. "All aboard on the ghost ship of cannibal rats!"
"Don't be afraid of the view from economy class!" Cherry sang.
"It's just the captain and crew jumping off of the mast!" Mirai sang.
"All aboard on the ghost ship of cannibal rats!" Monica sang.
"All aboard on the ghost ship of cannibal rats!" Phooko sang.
"Who's gonna sound the alarm when the bridges collapse?" Ellie sang.
"Is this the point where the bomb reaches critical mass?" Alison sang.
"All aboard on the ghost ship of cannibal rats!" Gabriel sang.
"All aboard on the ghost ship of cannibal rats!" Watts sang.
"One city from the coast!" Monica chanted.
"Disappearing too fast!" Cherry shouted.
"One city from the coast" Ellie chanted.
"Sunk into the past!" Alison shouted.
"All aboard on the ghost ship of cannibal rats!" They all sang. "All aboard on the ghost ship of cannibal rats!"
"One city from the coast!" Gabriel chanted.
"Disappearing too fast!" Mirai shouted.
"One city from the coast" Watts chanted.
"We can never come back!" Phooko shouted.
"All aboard on the ghost ship of cannibal rats!" They all sang to finish it off. "All aboard on the ghost ship of cannibal rats!
Cannibal rats!"
Up overheard in his helicopter, Chris turned to look into the camera. "And that's a wrap on the Final 9, the ghost ship of cannibal rats has officially set sail and the merge is in full swing, baby! Who will navigate this new form of game successfully and who will fall victim to the changing tides? Find out next time, on Total!
Drama!
Niiiiialasach!"
AN: And now we say our goodbyes to Gran.
He might not have been the best and challenges, or the most strategic force this season, but he certainly tackled both as best he could and I think we should all give him props for that.
He didn't get medically evacuated by blowing up either, so that's nice too!
For those wondering, Gran's alignment was: Chaotic Neutral (CN)
Having studied his actions throughout the season, Gran receives the title of: Tori
I say he exists within that weird space where I kinda want to say hero but I kind of want to say neutral, but I could see someone saying villain and everything seems perfectly in character, so congratulations Gran, you join Tori from Cursed Island in the ranks of the Tori title of the Hero/Villain/Neutral triumvirate! (But if I was hard pressed to pick one, I think considering his tendencies, I'd give him the hero label. Is he an effective one? No, at least not in this season. But his heart is clearly in the right place throughout his time on the show, and he does do what he can to combat 'villain' strategies when he sees them.)
Gran's Best Moment: I would say Gran's best moment, for me, was when he finished the tiebreaker challenge against Simon by managing to eat just one more bread bun, and basically proving to the people trying to vote him off that there were things he could excel at and he wasn't a complete liability like they led themselves to believe.
But that's all just my opinion, what do you guys think?
Gran will be back for the finale! Think he can make this season end with a bang (while also not getting hurt by a bang himself)?
Melody's challenge is up next! What do you think it will be?
AN2: We have a discord server! The link is on the profile!
EN: Woo. Done editing. Um, Gran was cool I guess. I think it's fun that he made it this far. My favorite Gran moment unfortunately has to be waaay back when he, Rashi, Zaheen, and Erin were fighting about magic. Idk why that isn't even a Gran moment, but I like that moment for what Gran said.
I think Melody's challenge will be… okay this will be kinda complicated. So, there's a lot of animosity here right? Heat merge. Fire merge. So, instead of a trust challenge, like what Chris usually does as a jerk. Melody just comes over and is like, okay, whoever can get the best revenge wins. I don't know how she's gonna score that, or what the restrictions are, but I think it'll be a pretty cool and dramatic chapter. I hope it happens because now I want to see it.
AN3: And as always, thanks for reading!
