Paint and Powder

A Star Trek anthology by Andrew Joshua Talon

DISCLAIMER: This is a non-profit fan based work of prose. Star Trek: The Next Generation, Deep Space Nine, Voyager et al are the property of CBS Television, and creation of Gene Roddenberry. Please support the official release.

"The Ninth Rule: Opportunity plus Instinct equals Profit."

"Rule 122: Never sleep with the bosses' sister."

"Uncle Quark."

"Rule 94! Females and Profit don't mix!"

With a huff, Nog stormed off as Bashir took a seat at the bar. He watched the young Ferengi go, and turned his eyes back to Quark.

"Quark, what was that all about?"

Quark snorted.

"Ever since Jake's been dating that ship, Nog's got it In his mind that he can do the same." Quark grumbled as he set a tumbler on the bar top and poured a drink out.

"Well, it's not unusual. Who's the girl he's got his ear on?" Bashir took the tumbler and began to drink.

"The Defiant."

Bashir spat his drink out over Morn. The Lurian silently wiped his face and scowled.

"And you didn't stop him?"

Quark shrugged.

"I tried."

"You couldn't try harder?"

"Rule 200: A Fenrengi chooses no path but his own. Believe me, it's bad enough that he joined Starfleet, and now look."

"Quark, he's going to get himself killed, or worse, he'll get a broken heart."

"Rule 29."

"….of course."

—

He could do it. All he had to do was go in there and ask.
And make sure Worf wasn't there.
Or Major Kira.
Or Dax.
Or O'Brien.
Or Odo.
Or Garak.
Or-

"Hi Nog!"

With an undignified screech, he fell to the floor.

"Are…are you ok?"

Nog quickly sat up and scrambled back to his feet.

"I'm fine. Great even!"

"that's good!"

That smile.

"Listen, Defiant, I…I need to ask you something."

"What is it?"

"I….You know how some people…I mean Jake….I, uh…."

He trailed off.

"What?"

"Please go out with me." He blurted out and winced.

An awkward silence filled the void.

"…uh…"

Without another word, the Defiant vanished.

"…..The 24th Rule of Acquisition: if they didn't refuse, there's still a chance to make a deal!" Nog cried.

"And that's why I need your help."

The Rotarran rolled her eyes. Morn's Freighter sighed. Terok scoffed.

"You called us here to ask for this nonsense?" Terok snapped.

"We're friends! Friends help each other!"

"That doesn't mean you have to wake me up now!"

"You don't sleep!" Defiant pointed out.

"That doesn't mean I have to be online all the time! Don't bother me with this."

With that, Terok vanished. Rotarran smirked.

"Klingon rituals are easy. He reads you poetry."

"That's it?" Defiant asked incredulously.

"You throw things at him with the intent to break his bones," the Rotarran took a drag from a pipe and smiled as she exhaled the smoke.

"I suggest you aim for the head."

"I…I think I want something less violent," Defiant stuttered. Rotarran snorted.

"Your loss."

Defiant looked over at Morn's Freighter. She spread her hands and made a few gestures. Defiant tilted her head curiously.

"Why do I need a hotdog and a donut?"

Morn's Freighter sighed.

"Morn, please, you're an expert at this sort of thing, I need your advice on how to woo her." Nog begged.

The Lurian sighed and put his drink down. He shifted his position so that he looked directly at the young Ferengi.

He opened his mouth to speak, but was cut off by Nog.

"What should I do? I asked Chief O'Brien and he gave me some advice. Doctor Bashir gave me a funny look. Major Kira told me to just go with my gut. Commander Worf just got a weird look and ran away.
I think Dax would just tell Captain Sisko, so I can't ask her."

Morn glanced around and shook his head, he gestured at the room and brought a finger up to his mouth.

"Too many people around?"

Morn nodded. He pulled out a Padd and slid it across the tabletop to Nog.

The Ferengi picked it up and read it.

"Are you sure?"

Morn nodded.

"Thank you."

Nog took the padd and ran off with it.

As soon as he left the bar, Morn's Ship avatar materialized in his seat. The two exchanged a quick nod and she vanished again.

All according to plan.

Quark slid up against the bar top, with another drink in hand.

"You better know what you're doing Morn."

Morn gave him a hard stare.

"I'm serious. You break my nephew's heart like that and I'll have to do something drastic."

Morn cocked an eyebrow.

"I'll have to have you pay off your tab."

Morn gaped in shock.

Written by myself and the always excellent Dramatic_Spoon.