Foresight

Chapter 8: A Time to Every Purpose

"To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing…"

—Ecclesiastes 3:1-5

"That's how you damaged your hand, isn't it… my boy?"

That moment, Izuku almost forgot to breathe, his eyes locked with All Might's as he set the tray back down hard on the table in front of him. He knows…

Every instinct in Izuku's mind screamed at him to grin and laugh it off to throw All Might off. There was no way this could end well. What if I change his future? What if I screw something up? What if Nezu was wrong and this is all a mistake and I wind up hurting him?

…

What if he's disappointed in me after all…?

But as All Might sat frozen, staring straight into Izuku's eyes, he found he couldn't lie. Izuku just stared back dumbly before finally managing to tear his gaze away from those piercing sapphire eyes to look down at his bandaged hand, the twisted remains of too many fights with a poorly contained quirk erupting inside of him. "I—" He tightly closed his eyes and forced a deep breath. What's the right answer? What do I do?

He could hear All Might stand from his side of the sofa, but Izuku couldn't open his eyes to look at him. He didn't have any words that could express what he was feeling—everything seemed weak and watered down. He thought he'd been ready for anything, but he hadn't been prepared to be seen.

Then, to his surprise, he felt a gentle touch to his arm—tentative and hesitant—followed by uncharacteristically quiet words. "I'm right, aren't I, my boy? It's… you, isn't it?"

Izuku managed a small nod. His legs felt suddenly weak beneath him, and he thought he was going to drop to the sofa. He probably would have except, to his surprise, suddenly All Might's large hand firmly gripped his good arm, and pulled Izuku into a tight hug.

It had been years since Izuku had really broken down into tears. Sure, he would have moments like earlier today where something would strike an emotional chord with him and bring him to the verge of tears. That happened to everyone one now and then. But after so many decades of seeing the worst sorts of things, he had thought he'd become too desensitized to respond with anything more extreme than that.

Apparently he was wrong.

All Might's hug was firm and strong. He held Izuku close, one large hand resting on the back of his shaggy silver hair, pressing Izuku's face into All Might's prominent shoulder. The man was all hard edges and sharp corners—skin and bones with some muscle layered in between. His hugs had never been what one could call comfortable, but they comforted. They were hopelessly awkward—it was obvious that All Might wasn't practiced in actually showing emotion—and they hurt a bit, but they were warm and caring. And they were so rare as to be precious. This hug was no different.

Something felt like it broke inside of Izuku at that moment. Like a dam had ruptured and all of the tears he'd had pent up for so many years were suddenly released. He suddenly found himself sobbing into All Might's shoulder, his own arms wrapped around the man's broad shoulders and fragile frame.

All Might just tightened his own grip slightly, finally saying in a thick and slightly husky voice, "You still know how to cry, huh?"

Izuku half-laughed into his shoulder. "Sorry," he managed to choke out. "I know you wanted me to grow out of that."

"There are worse habits to have." All Might finally released him.

Izuku reluctantly followed suit, swiping at his eyes as he did. He'd have sworn he saw All Might do the same, but it was probably just his imagination.

"You got big, kid."

Izuku chuckled softly. "I had to get strong, so I could make you proud."

To his surprise, All Might rested a large hand on his head and tousled his hair lightly. "You already make me proud, my boy."

Something twisted inside of Izuku's heart at those words. He'd always known—had always suspected, at least—but this gentle confirmation was almost too much for him.

"I've missed you…" The words were out of his mouth before he realized it. His eyes widened as he suddenly realized that he'd told All Might that he'd died. "Oh, no. I'm sorry! I probably shouldn't have told you that you… that you're…" He suddenly couldn't find any more words.

But All Might just shook his head, replying quietly, "It's okay, Young Midoriya. I can do the math. I'd have known even if you hadn't said anything." He slowly sat back down and motioned for Izuku to do the same.

"But the tea…" Izuku replied, dazed. "I promised to get more tea. I—"

"Sit. The tea can wait."

Izuku nodded, nervously tugging at a long strand of silver hair as he dropped onto the sofa again.

"How old are you now?" All Might asked in a subdued voice. He glanced up to study Izuku's face again, before pointedly looking away at the shelf of photographs once more.

"Sixty-five."

"Sixty-five…" All Might seemed to be murmuring the words more to himself than as any response to Izuku. "It's been fifty years for you…"

Izuku couldn't help but wonder what the other man was thinking, now that he had a moment to actually process this worn out old hero that his protege had become. Again that icy finger of worry twisted his gut. Was he really proud, or was he just being kind?

Both men fell into an awkward silence as though they both now needed to process through the sudden unexpected show of emotion.

Izuku was the first to speak. He cleared his throat before quietly offering a simple, "I'm sorry, All Might."

That apology seemed to snap All Might out of his thoughts. "What?" He seemed baffled.

"I'm sorry," Izuku repeated firmly.

All Might turned back to Izuku and blinked a couple of times blankly before seeming to understand. He waved off the apology with a swish of his hand. "Oh, that. It's all right. I understand why you didn't want to tell me. I'd imagine Recovery Girl threatened to sedate you if you so much as made eye contact with me." He smiled tightly as though he meant it to be a joke, but his eyes were still serious, as though he were processing through things while they spoke.

Izuku shook his head though. "No. I'm not worried about that. I mean… I'm sorry for that, too, but Recovery Girl might actually have killed me if she found out that I tried to talk to you. I don't have a death wish!"

All Might's brow furrowed. "What are you apologizing for, then?"

Izuku's eyes dropped to his lap. "I'm sorry I'm so broken down."

All Might shook his head. "What are you talking about, my boy? You're—?"

Izuku took a deep breath. "Gran Torino was still fighting into his eighties. You were able to keep going for years with your injury. But I—I just sort of wore out by the time I turned sixty. I kept going a while longer, but I just can't do it anymore. I'm sorry. You expected more of me and—"

He seemed baffled by the apology. "There's nothing wrong with you, my boy. Heroes wear down. That's a part of being a hero sometimes. And we don't all do it the same way. But that isn't a fault or a flaw."

Still, Izuku pressed on, unwilling to let it go that easily. "I know you wanted better from me, All Might. You wanted me to be the best, and I tried to make you proud. I really did. But—"

"Stop."

That single fierce word froze the words in Izuku's mouth.

"I didn't want better of you, my boy. I wanted better for you." All Might shook his head at what must have been a baffled expression on Izuku's face, and seemed to ponder a moment before trying a different tactic. His words turned gentle. "Don't you see? I didn't want you to turn out like me…" His voice trailed off at those words as All Might's eyes drifted to Izuku's injured left side. The frail man stiffed, and a look of realization and horror flashed abruptly across his face. "Oh… oh no…" His words were barely a whisper.

Izuku had never seen the man look so frightened or horrified in his life. He leaned forward, eyes wide in concern. "All Might? What's wrong?"

His eyes hadn't left Izuku's side. "Your injury. Your left side… don't tell me…" All of the color had washed out of his face.

Izuku took a fraction of a moment longer than he cared to admit to realize what the other man meant. Then it struck him. "Oh! No, no! I'm fine, All Might. Really. It's only some broken ribs. I promise."

"Ribs? Then he didn't…"

The panic didn't fade immediately from the other man's eyes, so Izuku leaned forward and repeated earnestly, "No. All Might, I promise I'm fine. He didn't hurt me."

All Might was still ashen. His eyes were pressed shut and it almost looked for a moment like he was trying to force himself to breathe again. The paleness made him look older and more fragile than ever, and Izuku leaned forward to gently put a supporting hand on All Might's arm, uncertain what to do. He worried that the sudden moment of panic might trigger one of the other man's breathing episodes.

"All Might?" Izuku asked quietly, leaning toward the man. "Are you all right?" He tried to smile and put the warm, comforting tone into his voice as he'd learned to do over the years, but for some reason it felt even more fake than usual. He gave up trying, and just kept his firm grip on the other man's arm until he seemed to be breathing properly again. There was blood at the corner of the other man's mouth, but that didn't surprise Izuku as much as the startling realization that All Might was that worried about him, even now. Has he always cared this much?

Finally, after what felt like an eternity to Izuku, All Might opened his eyes and shook his head slightly as though trying to clear some image from it. He managed a faint smile at Izuku, but didn't meet his eyes. Quietly, he spoke, tugging a handkerchief out of his pocket and wiping off the crimson from the corner of his mouth. "I'm sorry, my boy. I—" He hesitated as though uncertain if he should continue, but then simply said after a moment's hesitation, "I didn't mean to worry you."

Izuku's mouth tightened into a thin line and he didn't release his grip on All Might's arm. "You didn't answer my question, All Might."

The other hero's eyes flicked up to his, and when he finally made eye contact again, Izuku added, "Are you okay? You scared me there for a minute."

It had only taken a moment for the frail hero to regain his composure and flash one of his too big smiles at Izuku. "My boy, don't worry about me. I just…"

He seemed to falter there, and Izuku took that moment to interrupt, his voice stern, "Don't try to blow me off, All Might. You were not fine. You had an episode, didn't you?" At All Might's blank stare, he continued, "Do you need me to grab your PTSD medication? Have you even been taking it?"

The other man's smile dropped and his mouth hung open slightly. "My…?" He blinked at Izuku's serious expression before furrowing his brows and glancing away. "My boy, what makes you think—"

But Izuku firmly cut him off again, "I don't think you take it. I know you do. I've picked your medications up for you, All Might. I know what you take—at least what you will take. But I can't imagine that Recovery Girl didn't prescribe it for you right after Kamino." His grip tightened slightly on the other man's arm. "She did, didn't she?"

Again, they locked eyes.

"I'm fine," All Might responded. A small smile quirked the corner of his mouth. "I've been taking all of my medications like a good little boy, other than the pain medication. Stop worrying." He coughed lightly, swiped at his mouth one more time, and tucked the handkerchief back into his pocket. A small smile, more genuine this time, twitched his lips. "I can see where all of that grey hair came from."

Izuku sighed, exasperated, and finally released the other man's arm. "I just worry about you, All Might," he murmured. "You don't take care of yourself." He motioned to the pills. "Like the pain medication. Why aren't you taking it? Why do you make people force you to take your medication?" A little spark of frustration kindled inside.

The man leaned forward, running his hand roughly through his wild, blond hair. "No one has to force me to take my medications, my boy. I am a grown man. I take them when I need them."

Izuku couldn't even find words to respond to that. He stood up abruptly and quickly walked back to the bookshelf to glare at the photos. "Then maybe you need to learn when to take them." A knot was forming in his gut, twisting with each word. I need to shut up. Why am I saying these things? This is the first time I've spoken to you in years, and it's my last chance to be with you. Why am I ruining it?

Distantly, Izuku could hear the other man stand and approach him, but his thoughts were swirling in his mind, and he couldn't concentrate on anything but steadying his own breath and clenching his jaw to keep his mouth shut before he said anything else he might regret.

But do I regret it? he wondered. Do I really? It's true. You don't take your medicine properly. You practically shoved my own pain medicine down my throat when I refused it, but then you always sat back and insisted that you were fine, fine, fine. His fists balled tightly and he clenched his jaw. His eyes were screwed shut as he tried to keep back tears of frustration and guilt that he'd held back for years as thoughts flowed freely. "I should have forced you to take them sooner. I should have known you didn't. Maybe if you'd taken your medications better you'd have lived longer. I wasn't ready to lose you!"

His breath was coming out in ragged sobs before he even realized he'd said that out loud. All Might rested his own hand on Izuku's shoulder—tentatively at first. Then, as Izuku found he was unable to control his tears, All Might pulled him back into a fierce hug. "Young Midoriya," he said quietly, "don't tell me you blame yourself for my…" He trailed off there, clearly unable to mention his own death so freely.

Izuku wasn't able to answer, trying to just bring his own mind back under control.

All Might's grip tightened on him, and the other man gently rested a large hand on Izuku's head, pulling Izuku around into a proper hug. "You can't blame yourself for the things I do," he said gently. When Izuku didn't respond, he added, "Why are you so upset about it, anyway? I have to have… died long ago for you. After all this time, you can't honestly still think anything was your fault. My mistakes are mine, not yours. I don't blame you for any of them—even the ones that haven't happened yet."

"But I do," Izuku whispered, finally managing to choke words out. He released the tight fists his hands had clenched into and, like a child, found himself reaching around the other man to hug him back tightly—more tightly than before—unable in his current pain to be as gentle as he'd been earlier.

"Why, my boy?"

"I wasn't ready to lose you, All Might. I miss you." His breath was finally regulating, but a small sob escaped.

"You miss me…" The other man murmured those words wonderingly. "After so long?"

Izuku tightened his grip on the other man, "I told you," he replied quietly, face buried in the other man's bony shoulders. "It never really heals when you lose your dad…"

Author's note: Thank you to granny_griffin for betaing this chapter. Also thanks to all of you for reading, faving, commenting, subscribing, and patiently waiting.

I hope you enjoy!

Sincerely,
Sirius:)