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A Hulking Metamorphosis Pt 2
Train rides were something Saki Yoshida never thought she would ever enjoy.
She remembered as a young girl when the thought of being around so many strangers made her uncomfortable. She would freeze in the isolated little corner she scurried to until she heard her destination's name over the train's speakers. The eyes that she imagined were watching her, judging her every uncomfortable movement and every awkward step.
The woman she once was hated trains because no matter where she looked, all she saw were the potential predators surrounding her. Men who looked at her like she was nothing more than a cheap lay and a plaything to throw away once they got bored of her, leering at her as they licked their chops like wolves, Salivating at the thought of tearing her apart and swallowing her whole.
The woman she was now, though, felt conflicted.
She still hated it; stepping onto the train platform, the ground zero of far more bad memories for Saki to recount at once, still made her skin crawl. It was a feeling Saki tried desperately to fight against, the paranoia that gnawed at her like a dog does to a bone, coming in slow but steady waves instead of the unstopping onslaught it once did only a few months ago.
Once she returned home, she had to thank Banner-san for everything once again, a habit she caught herself slipping into nearly every day since she met him. The unyielding weight of her accomplishment reminded Saki of just how far she had come in such a short time.
Today marked week ten of the start of Saki's new life, the days she spent in the haze of drug dependence and squalor feeling like a lifetime ago now that she has had time for her head to clear and the pains of withdrawal to dissipate.
Despite being a stranger, Banner-san had made it his mission to ensure Saki was cared for and protect her from the worst aspects of herself.
Saki was afraid she was just making the same mistake she had made too many times before, trusting a man who only saw her as an item to use, but Banner-san had proven himself better than the men Saki surrounded herself with in the past.
After suffering for so long and by the hand of so many, Saki's views on a healthy relationship had been skewed, impaled on thick wooden poles, and left to rot for the world to stare and gawk at.
But Banner...Bruce had been different.
The foreigner had lifted her off from the puddle of her own blood and vomit when Saki herself had given up on life or any chance she had to better herself. He had not only nursed her back to health physically but had also been there for Saki to heal mentally.
The man was an enigma. He kept his past close to his chest and darted his eyes to every shadow he encountered. He held a wealth of knowledge that few single men could possess, but he rarely spoke about where he acquired it.
Even after living under the same roof as the man, a small apartment turned clinic that had quickly become a desperately needed lifeline to so many poor unfortunate souls of the city, Saki barely knew enough about the man to call him a friend.
He felt like an uncle that Saki didn't know existed, like one last sick joke her parents made on her years after throwing her out of their lives and home. Saki was an only child, but being around Bruce made her feel like she had an older brother, a figure of support and comfort who almost made Saki think she could do anything as long as she had his support.
It was one of the main reasons Saki agreed to take this train ride alone. It was the first time in the ten weeks of her recovery that Saki did not have Bruce with her as she entered the outside world. Baby steps were one thing; Saki could make it to the corner convenience store on the off hours just fine, or even make the five-minute walks to her part-time job just fine, a clerk performing simple data entry during the offices closed hours, but being in a locked off and sealed underground train with hundreds of people in the middle of the Monday morning Tokyo metro commute was something entirely different.
But Bruce had already done so much for her, so Saki had to try to be the person the man thought she could be.
The public house in which they lived, nothing more than an assortment of lower-income dwellings and apartment complexes, was in desperate need of a doctor who didn't drink on the job, something that Bruce San met the qualifications for the moment he met his superintendent of the apartment complex during their first meeting.
Less than a few weeks later, Bruce had made himself an indispensable fixture to the hard-working men and women who lived on the rougher side of town, whose circumstances had made regular hospital or doctor visits little more than a fantasy before he arrived. So important was the man's time that Saki felt compelled not to bother the man during one of his few free mornings when it was time for Saki to head uptown, letting the man get more than his usual four hours of sleep he usually got every night. A decision her paranoia was making her regret but one that she was becoming more comfortable with as time went on.
Besides, he was only tired because he spent all the time he wasn't working trying to knock some book sense into the former drug addict. Bruce San wasn't satisfied with healing Saki, the man seemingly making it his mission to take the high school dropout she was and transform her into someone worthy enough to become a scholar.
It was a long process, with long nights of studying and tutoring, working around the clinics' schedules, and the two part-time jobs Saki managed to get for herself to help ensure Bruce didn't work himself to the bone to afford living expenses for the both of them to do so.
"The man deserves his rest." Saki thought as she left their small, cheaply furnished living space on her way to her college entrance exam, free of achieving perfect marks on her Certificate for Students Achieving the Proficiency Level of Upper Secondary School Graduates exam less than 48 hours prior." The more I can do myself, the less he has to worry about."
Saki still felt like she was just waiting for the next strike to hit her across the face, the anxiety making it sometimes more challenging to breathe. Even though she wore nothing more risque than the off-brand leggings or an oversized sweatshirt, Saki could still feel the eyes of men old enough to be her father roaming over her body. She had managed to make this relatively painful moment into an uneven road bump towards her goal.
No matter how much she wanted to lock herself up in a small, dark room and never be bothered by the outside world again, Saki Yoshida knew she could not let her worst days define her. Besides, she had promised Bruce-San that she would try to be stronger than she was before, and after all he had done for her, Saki could never break that promise.
But despite the brave act Saki was trying to put forward, she was still terrified. Too many people and too tight of a space made her feel uneasy, even with the light of the morning sunbathing her through the windows. Usually, she only took the women-only train cars. She would never let a man touch her again without her consent, and if anyone even so much as brushed against her shoulder longer than what would be considered accidental, then he would find himself with broken fingers.
Never again, she thought to herself as she eyed the mass of people, every corner of the train filled to the brim with middle-aged salary-men on their way to work and cocky looking school boys trying to be subtle as they tried to peak over blouses or get a hand full of skirt of the women and girls not paying attention to the wolves sniffing around them when the train shifted around a turn.
Thankfully, most on the train paid her little mind, far too busy with their own lives and business beyond a friendly "hello" or a half-mumbled "good morning" between sips of coffee and rearrangement of newspapers.
Unfortunately for Saki, most did not mean all.
"Hey, baby. It's not my birthday until June!" Saki cringed at the young man's voice poor attempt at flirting, the image of his eyes roaming over her body making the young woman's skin crawl." But it looks like you brought me some cake early!"
Saki internally groaned at the poor attempt at flirting, rolling her eyes at the young man's continued attempts to "convince" Saki to change her mind. He was the type of guy Saki was ashamed to admit she once found attractive; his tan skin, spiked-up blonde hair, and pretty face would make him the scourge of the host club he'll work at after dropping out of high school.
"I'm sure you're a nice guy." He probably wasn't, but Saki didn't want to cause a scene out in public. Saki had been on the receiving end of one too many men not taking her no's as an answer before, and even in public, didn't fully feel safe when her would-be suitor looked at her like he was doing." But I'm just not interested in a relationship right now. Sorry."
"Come on, babe, no need to be harsh." the teenager said, stepping a bit too close for Saki's comfort as he motioned to two similar-looking boys in identical school uniforms he wore." You have no idea how nice my friends and I can..."
Saki felt the familiar sensation of a man's hand on her backside, her fight-or-flight response roaring to life to the unwanted stimuli. She reached down, gripping the boy's larger hand with her own and twisting in an attempt to wrench the appendage off of her.
...an action far more manageable than the size disparity between the two would imply.
Instead of seeing the annoyed glare of a teenage boy looking down on her with a scowl at being rejected, Saki saw her would-be suitor drop to his knees, his free hand trying in vain to free itself from her grip, and the sound of fingers breaking.
His face was a mask of pain, looking less like a wolf on the hunt he was a moment ago and more like a small doe-eyed baby deer caught in a beer trap, his failed attempts of freeing himself only causing him to wail in pain more.
"Listen." Saki responded quickly, her words confident as her muscles tightened, cutting the boy's attempts to free himself." I have a lot of stuff on my plate right now, but even if I didn't, I wouldn't touch you or your greasy-haired friends with a ten-foot pole, so why don't you and your boyfriends over there go find someone else to bother!"
Saki let the boy go with a huff, her eyes ablaze with annoyance and anger as she squeezed her hands into a fist so hard her knuckles turned white. The teenager scurried backward to the posse of confused and frightened teenage boys that hung back, a petrified look etched on his face, and his entire outlook on life changed forever. His hand wasn't broken, but Saki could see the beginnings of a nasty-looking bruise that would be the boy's badge of dishonor for at least a few weeks.
"Next time a lady says no, you take that as the answer. You got that?"
Saki watched as the boys scurried off to the opposite side of the train car, bumping into the unsuspecting audience Saki's action had caused. None of them looked happy, as if their right to a morning commute was worth more than Saki's dignity. Their impassive eyes looked at her with shock and disdain, Saki was sure more than a few older gentlemen thought how lucky they were not to have a daughter who would make a scene out in public like she did.
Oh no, they were the type of men who raised their daughters properly to not fight back when men touched them, or just leaned back and let it happen when a boy took what they wanted from them.
Saki took a deep breath, trying to calm her heart from beating out of her chest as she perceived danger from all sides. She would not be a victim again, but that didn't mean she had to be frightened of every dark corner and every person with a fake smile she saw. No, she refused to give people like that power over her again; witnessing every man as a potential assailant was just as unhealthy for her as hiding away in her room for the rest of her life.
"One day at a time." She remembered Bruce's words, the feeling of his hands on hers as he helped her work through one of her stress-induced panic attacks."Take a deep breath and control your heart. Take all the time you need; I'm right here with you."
The older man seemed so confident about stuff like that, but Saki often wondered who the man really was. How Bruce knew what he knew and how Bruce did what he did, where he went to school and where he was born, who the man was beyond his kindness was as mysterious to the young girl as why a person like that would willingly choose to help someone like her in her time of need.
"Questions for later," Saki thought to herself as the train slowed to a stop. The robotic voice of the speaker told her that she had arrived at her destination without a minute to spare. Before her life had fallen apart, saki had perfect attendance for school, from day care until her first year of high school; She was hoping that her college life would be the same.
College life meant the world to Saki, her former studious nature blossoming like a wildflower from the ashes of a forest fire. The months of late-night tutoring had seemingly melted the cloud of self-doubt and self-hatred she wore like an oversized coat during her darker days; she was just lucky that Bruce-San had been willing to not only help her pay for school but also tutor her to catch up with what she had missed after dropping out all those years ago.
It was a shame Saki hadn't met Bruce San before her former life had happened; Things could have been a lot different if she had someone like him in her corner.
Saki paused momentarily, her brisk walk slowing to a crawl as she saw her reflection in a clothing boutique window. Gone was the thick makeup she wore to hide her bruises, her once long hair was stripped of its blonde dye, replaced with black hair tied in a messy bun and pale skin made even paler from lack of sleep from long nights of studying and tutoring.
She remembered seeing herself in the mirror all those months ago, when she had been at her lowest when she had given up on ever being happy again, and when the night air chilled her to the bone even under the summer sun. Saki looked like a different person now, which she supposed was an accurate description of who she was now, the aftershocks of her previous life transforming her into the stranger who was staring back.
In memory of her daughter, the child she never got to hold and whose name Saki would never utter aloud that she would live solely so their memory was never forgotten, and for them, she would get used to the woman she was now.
"P-please stop. I-I want to go home..." a strained voice broke Saki out of her thoughts, like the wobbling of a songbird crying out right before it was swallowed up by a snake. "I d-don't want this..."
Saki felt her blood go cold as she heard it, years of memories flashing before her eyes as she felt the cold fear grip tight against her skin before coiling itself into the pit of her stomach. She turned to the corner of the train platform to see an alley, secluded and isolated in the shadows of two separate shops with little to no foot traffic from the busy morning commuters. She saw the figure of a man, his black suit hiding his grotesque form from view, like a cloud of smoke would conceal the bloated remains of a home gutted by fire. His hair was short and spiked looking, clearly dyed in some vein attempt to keep his youth intact as he aged out of whatever boy band look he had been going for during his younger years. But beyond that, he looked like almost every other young professional salary man on the crowded train platform, like a wolf in sheep's clothing hiding in plain sight as his hands pawed the skin of a school girl, barely the age Saki was when she first entered high school.
"Please, someone..." the girl cried out, fear gripping tight against her lungs like smog choking her lungs as tears welled up in her eyes. Her uniform was disheveled, her stockings torn in places the older man slipped his hands into, and her hair ribbons ripped off her head and used to tie her hands together to let her abuser do his vile works.
Saki refused to be a victim again, and she refused to be a spectator while others were victimized.
"Hey, you! Let that girl go!" Saki shouted, every instinct screaming at her to move and get the younger girl away from her assailant. Surprise and adrenaline mixed with her fear and apprehension, forming a complicated cocktail of emotions that made the young woman feel like her skin was on fire while her blood was ice cold." You hear me!?"
Saki was a bit surprised by her own words; even while living on the streets, she had learned that being ignored by most people was the easiest way to ensure her safety. Hiding in plain sight had become second nature to her after so long, her former wall flower tendencies evolving into a defense mechanism. Still, the sight before her made Saki feel she had grown two feet in height in as many seconds as she walked closer to the man and girl in question.
"Buzz off, lady! Can't you see I'm busy?" the man asked, his voice familiar to Saki as she stepped closer. The shadows of the alley were illuminated by the mid-morning light, but even still it was too dark to see most of the mans facial features, but for the life of Saki she couldn't help but find that man somehow familiar.
"I said let the girl go! Or do you need me to call the cops?"
The young girl screamed again, using the distraction of the man's grip loosening to try and wiggle out of his grasp before she was yanked backward by the savage, her back pressed against the man's chest like a human shield.
"This is all a misunderstanding! Isn't it?" the man said, his voice drifting into an almost familiar rhythm as he held the young girl in place against the wall. " I was helping this girl, is all! Isn't that right? Tell the nice lady that there's nothing to worry about!"
The girl said nothing, fear gripping her throat as her legs trembled like a kitten left out in the harsh winter. Saki had seen that look many times, staring straight at her from the mirror's reflection. Her own cowardice and self-loathing making the simple act of looking herself in the eye harder to do so day by day.
"I-I-I just w-want to..."
"See! This is my girlfriend! We're just messing around! Why don't you mind your business, lady, and leave us alone?"
"She's old enough to be your daughter. She should be in school making friends! not getting molested by some dip-shit in a dark alley." Saki said, her words as brutal as they were true. How men in this society could so openly leer at the bodies of girls, of how easily they were allowed to comment and catcall literal children on their way home from school, it made her sick to think about. "Let me guess, are you gonna tell me she came on to you?"
Saki felt heated; whatever hesitation she may have felt long since evaporated as she felt her muscles tense and the sound of her joints popping filling her ears.
"Now listen here..."
"I know the routine, "Saki shouted, stepping forward, an action that surprised the aspiring college student with how bold it was. Her insides felt like they were on fire; the voice in the back of her head that seemed to grow louder and louder each day compelled her forward. "You get your jollies off on touching kids? Why? Because women your age make fun of that baby carrot you call a dick?"
Saki almost seemed shocked at her own words. The meek little girl and the broken young woman she used to be staring in shock at the woman she was now. The fire in her heart blazing to life with the force of a thousand suns, making her stand up taller and straighter to make her feel physically bigger, like she was trying to scare of a bear.
"H-hey, you watch your mouth, bitch" the man shouted, whatever embarrassment and desire to sweep this event under the rug forgotten at the insult." Don't speak of issues you know nothing about."
There was the real him, Saki thought to herself, the real man who would hide in plain sight and play the part of a hard-working man at his job and the loving father and husband at home. The mask of civility seemed to melt away at the barest insult against his ego, just like her ex-boyfriend and father.
"I know that men like you only go for little girls because they can't satisfy a woman who has had more than their own finger inside of them."
What the hell was she saying?! The words seemed to come out of her, the base desire to throttle the man in front of her for doing to this poor girl what so many men had done to her, driving past her insecurities and fears.
Sigmund Freud or some other sort would describe it as Saki's id, her raw unconscious emotions and long-buried feelings overpowering her ego and superego, the restraints of Saki's intellect, and fear of society's scorn thrown to the wayside. While most modern specialists bring the veracity of Freud's findings into question, Saki seemed to be living proof as she eyed the disgusting man in front of her.
"Listen here, you fucking whore! If you don't keep that mouth of yours shut..."The man shouted, his voice crazed and unafraid of attracting attention in this isolated corner of the street.
Saki saw the look of fear etched onto the younger woman's face as the man shouted, gripping her tear-stained cheeks and ruined makeup tighter. Saki wondered if that's what she looked like when she was that girl's age. Before the drugs and before the abuse, before the darkness that filled her very being, Saki was just a schoolgirl who wanted to be noticed and ended up being seen by the wrong type of people. People like the man in front of her.
Saki would rather die than let an innocent girl suffer the way she was forced to suffer, the burning sensation in her body growing hotter and hotter with each passing moment. So focused was Saki on the sight of the girl asking for help and the man holding her threateningly that Saki overlooked her perspective of the world around her, which began to shift.
The buildings around her seemed to shrink, her eyes going from looking up at the taller man figure to looking down on him like the cockroach he was, the ever-growing bald spot on the top of his head looking more and more like a target as Saki got closer.
Saki felt her body tighten like her muscles were flexing and coiling, making the former victim feel like a lioness on the plains of the Savannah, ready to rip open the belly of the fat gazelle dumb enough to think it could tangle with her.
"Get away from me, you freak." the man shouted, fear and terror gripping tight against his chest as he threw the young girl to the ground, backing up against the brick wall of the alleyway in a sad attempt to get away from her. He looked like he had seen a monster, like some demon had been ripped right out of his greatest nightmare and come to life.
At this moment, Saki realized that he was talking to her and that she was not the same person she had been when she entered the alleyway.
She felt...amazing!
She towered over the man now, his fat face and beady black eyes barely leaving Saki's chest, her head and shoulders above him. Her muscles were strong, chiseled like a bodybuilder, and lean like a champion gymnast. She felt the sound of her heels snapping, her bare feet meeting the concrete of the ground, but she didn't seem to care. She felt her muscles ripple across the fabric of her clothing as she grew larger and stronger with each passing second.
"Where do you think you're going?" Saki shouted, her hand shooting forward and impacting the brick wall the man leaned in front of, cracking the stone and mortar as quickly as it were paper mache in her hands." What's wrong? You don't like being pushed around by someone stronger than you?"
She pushed the man lightly, the tiny little shove enough to throw the man's entire bulk several feet, his body sliding against the floor like he had been struck by a moving car.
"Please don't do this," the man sputtered, the violence and aggression in his words from before replaced with the fear that tinged the words of his victim."I have a Daughter..."
Saki felt her blood run cold at the implication, the image of a seemingly ordinary family man with a daughter around the same age as the girl he held against the wall, his dirty hands burning her skin as he imagined his child in her place. Saki was reminded of her own father, the man who threw her to the ground, took what he wanted from her, and threw her away when it was convenient.
"She's better off without a rapist for a father," Saki said defiantly, thoughts of her father putting his hands on her filling her mind as she gripped the man's face, lifting his limp from a foot off the ground to meet her at eye level. Seeing long green fingers gripping the man's face like a vice caused Saki to pause momentarily.
What was happening to her? Why was she green? These questions were for later because the only thing Saki had on her mind right now was the safety of the girl behind her and the pain she was ready to inflict on the man in her grip.
"M-Miss..." the young girl's voice, her messy pink hair, and her tear-stained face resembled looking into a mirror for the girl Saki used to be. "What are you going to do to him?"
"Only what he deserves. You might want to close your eyes, kid." Saki said, her voice once timid and quiet now filled with the strength and confidence of a woman who could break the backs of bears and tear tigers in twain with a single shrug of her shoulders." Someone your age doesn't need to see this."
The new chapter comes out this friday.