Regrets and Other Old Friends
"Naruto, Naruto, you OK?" he heard Sakura's voice as if it was muffled and far away.
What he wanted to say was 'I am ok', what came out of his mouth was a low groan with babbling sounds like a lost cat before he rolled over onto his back the pillow he had wrapped around his head falling to the floor as he tried to blink the world into focus.
"Are you okay? You look like you've been through hell. What type of training did you do last night? I found all your clothes on the bathroom floor soaking wet, did you fall in a river or something.", asked Sakura as she hovered over him.
He was surprised to see Sakura standing there, looking concerned. Her pink hair was tied up in a messy bun, and she was wearing a pair of light blue pants that ended halfway down her calf and a green T-shirt with a swirl on the front, a far cry from her usual attire. Part of him was saddened by the change from what she had been sleeping in, while another part wished he had died for betraying her. His head was pounding, and the world was spinning. The fox was laughing in the background, yelling 'foolish human' as if Naruto's pain were all a joke to him.
"No river," he grunted out, rolling over to sit up. As the sheet fell away, Sakura's eyes grew wide, and her whole face turned pink before she turned around.
"Naruto, you forgot your sleeping pants. What are you doing?" She said, having gotten an eyeful of a fully naked Naruto. It was clear his well-chiseled chest and six-pack abs weren't the only things he was packing.
"Sorry Sakura, let me get dressed," he said wrapping the sheet around his waist and searching for some clothes in the closet, it was so much easier when all he had to do was grab the same orange clothes every time but now he had to poke around all her cloths to find something to wear. With his head pounding he didn't make the best choices as he walked into the bathroom to change.
Coming out in black pants and a green T-shirt, he looked around to find Sakura in the kitchen, putting food on some plates. The smell was fantastic, and he wondered for a second if he was in the right apartment before sitting down at one of the only two chairs at the small table.
Looking at the plate she placed in front of him, he saw a mixture of beef, onions, and noodles he had never seen before. No broth or bowl, so this wasn't ramen.
"Wow, Sakura, did you cook this?" he asked, pausing before putting anything in his mouth, waiting for her to go first, at least this time the food wasn't moving.
"No, this is from that little restaurant at the end of the street. It's called Mongolian beef. I think you will like it," she said as she started to eat.
After one mouthful, Naruto dove into his plate. It wasn't as good as ramen, but what was? It came in as a close second on his new favorite food.
"This is the best, but it's a strange food for breakfast," he said between mouthfuls.
"Yes, it would be, but it's noon. You slept in all morning. You were so dead to the world I didn't want to wake you," she said, eating at a more normal pace.
As soon as the meal was done she took the plates to the sink and came back wiping her hands on a towel before sitting down and looking over at him. He still looked like he had a hard time training last night and she was a little worried he overdid it.
"What happened last night? Did you hurt yourself?", thinking that they may need a med Nin or go see the Hokage.
Naruto looked over at her, she looked so concerned that it would kill him to lie to her. It was his nature to never lie, it never worked out and he always forgot what he said. He found out long ago it was best to keep it simple and to the truth.
"I went running like you said, I ran into Gaara and Temari in one of the parks. Did you know that the Hokage healed her? She looks back to normal, anyway, Gaara said that I had to marry Termari because I defeated her, it's a sand village thing and all that.", he said but had to stop when Sakura's shocked face and her hands balled into fists promising death to someone.
"Don't worry I said no way, you know, marriage is for love and all that and I don't even know her," said Naruto as fast as he could before she did something to him or went searching for Gaara of all people.
"Good, did he understand it wasn't going to happen?" she said calming down and spreading her hands on the table
"Well, he said we had to talk about it again when they got back from Sunagakure but you know that doesn't change anything.", he added, seeing the worried look on her face.
"So what happened? Did she throw you into a pond or something?" asked Sakura.
"Pond? Oh, you mean why I was so wet. I kind of took a shower with my clothes on," he said, grinning at how funny it sounded.
"And just why would you do that?" she asked, sensing there was something else to his story he hadn't told her about.
"It's kind of funny. You see, after I left Gaara, I started home, you know, up on Neon Avenue where the clubs are. I ran into Ino and her three cousins," started Naruto, but Sakura interrupted him, her expression now more concerned.
"No, you don't mean Botan and her sisters. They call themselves the Blue Ball Brigade," said Sakura, looking a lot more worried than before.
"Botan, I think that was one of their names. It was all a blur, really. They kind of dragged me into a club to dance, and there was a lot of drinking," said Naruto, shaking his head as he remembered what happened. He had never been in a club but when the girls pulled him in the bouncer didn't blink an eye.
"It was crazy, they wouldn't let me leave, and there was so much drinking. I didn't know girls could drink so much. And then there was Kiba. He was yelling and howling all night. You know, he even brought a girl into the men's bathroom. I don't get it. They were noisy in the stall, and I didn't understand why that girl was yelling 'harder' all the time. Kiba looked like he was attacking her or something." Naruto looked totally confused and was looking to Sakura for answers.
Sakura paused, realizing Naruto lacked any understanding about sex and what was going on. "Naruto, it seems like you missed out on some... educational sessions back in the academy."
Naruto furrowed his brows. "What do you mean?."
Sakura sighed inwardly, wondering how to explain it to him. "Well, there are some things they teach in the academy that are... um, important for adults. Like... uh, relationships and... intimacy." She didn't want to talk about the STDs or how seduction was used in assassination missions.
Naruto's eyes lit up with understanding. "Oh, you mean teamwork and trust! Like when we fight together as a team!"
Sakura struggled to keep a straight face. "Well, sort of, Naruto. It's more like... physical teamwork. You remember when they had all the boys go to one class and all the girls to another?"
"OH yeah, but when I got there, the sensei said I was too disruptive and I could go train or whatever. It was great; I had the whole week off," said Naruto with a grin.
"That was the sex ed class, it was mandatory. How could they do that to you?" said Sakura more to herself than Naruto. This explained so very much about how he had been acting around her.
"Sex ed, what's that?" asked Naruto.
"Let's talk about it later. Right now, let's focus on what else happened last night," she said, thinking, no, hoping that Ino and her little devil cousins didn't do anything more than tease Naruto last night. Could he have sex and not even know what was happening, with Naruto you never knew.
"Did Ino and her cousin do anything else, um, you know, to you or anything?" asked a worried Sakura, thinking she may have to go find Ino and kick her ass around the block or something.
"It was crazy at the end of the night," Naruto admitted, sounding utterly lost as he rubbed the back of his head in confusion.
"They dragged me onto the dance floor, and then they started taking turns dancing with me. I had no clue dancing involved all that rubbing up against each other and stuff. It was... something else. And then, all of a sudden, they were all kissing me, and Ino got mad, and I ended up flat on my back in the middle of the dance floor as they all started screaming at each other. Kiba was yelling that I got game, what is that anyway?" asked Naruto, still wondering what Kiba had been doing with that girl in the men's room.
Not getting an answer out of Sakura he continued.
" And the next thing I knew, the club was closing, and I was stumbling around outside, trying to make my way home. Somehow, I managed to get back here, I was so out of it I think I walked around the whole village twice."
"When I got home you were asleep," he paused there, remembering what she was wearing and how close he came to doing something, what that was he wasn't sure, " and I ended up in the shower with all my clothes on. My head was spinning, and the fox inside me was cracking up at the whole ridiculous mess calling me stupid human over and over." Naruto looked more confused as he talked about his night.
Sakura just stared at him with her mouth open, she was at a loss for words, how did a simple run turn into such an adventure? Only Naruto would have a night like that and still, it sounded too fantastic to be real. If she didn't know better she would think he made the whole thing up but Naruto wasn't the type to do that.
Then the panic began to set in, realizing she was far more dependent on him than he was on her. If he could be swayed by every short skirt with a smile, she'd lose him before even getting a chance to claim him. How could she compete against Ino and her entourage or that bloody daughter of the Kazekage? Naruto's carefree nature would undoubtedly get him ensnared by a money-grubbing harpy, leveraging his ties to the Hokage clans for her own social status. Why did he have to announce his clan affiliation to the whole store? What was she even thinking?
Breaking out of her daze she stood up, "Come, put on some training clothes, I want to work on my taijutsu.", she said as she pulled out her own training clothes and went into the bathroom to change.
As they entered the training grounds behind the Hokage mountain Naruto wondered if Sakura was mad at him or not, she hadn't said a word after coming out of the bathroom wearing a skin-tight outfit that reminded him of something Lee would wear only sexier. With her midriff showing off her abs and the sports bra-like top he was thinking she could be going to the club but she insisted he show her where he trained with Jiraiya.
"So this is where that pervert trained you?", she said looking around the open area with the tree line to the back and the cliff that dropped off to the river below.
"Ya, it's here where he threw me off the cliff to get me to summon the boss toad.", said Naruto pointing at the offended cliff.
"OK, let me warm up and then you can show me what you got.", she said wasting no time as she started her dynamic stretching routine Mighty Guy trained her to do first. With graceful movements, she stretched and contorted her body, each stretch a testament to a flexibility Naruto didn't know she had. From bending over backward almost touching her feet to raising a leg high over her head and spinning around he couldn't take his eyes off her.
Once she felt limber she ran to one of the larger trees and ran up it to end up hanging upside down from one of the larger branches. Then to Naruto's shock, she started doing upside-down sit-ups touching her toes with her elbows and yelling out her counts as she went.
Reaching 500 she simply dropped to the ground 30 feet below and looked at Naruto, "Aren't you going to warm up before I kick your ass?", she said with a grin before moving back to the base of the tree.
With lightning-fast punches and kicks, she shattered the silence with her yells of attack, the rhythmic sound of her blows impacting the tree echoing off the surrounding cliffs. Each strike was executed with precision, showcasing the speed and power of her movements as she flowed seamlessly from one form to another, her body a blur of motion. If it wasn't for the pink hair flying around and the fact she was in a teal outfit Naruto would have sworn he was watching Lee at work.
He decided it was time to do his own training and stop staring at Sakura's body as she started to break pieces off of the tree, and noticed she had put on a pair of gloves at some point sparing her hands to some degree.
Using the training Ebisu had given him he started on strength training with fallen trees and large rocks before working on his stances, the fundamental postures that provide a stable base for executing most of his techniques. Moving seamlessly between Ma Bu to Gong Bu into Xie Bu ending with Long Xing shi the Dragon he felt his mind finding itself one of peace as his body found a rhythm in the movements as he went faster and faster until he was a whirl of motion.
The flow of Naruto's graceful, fluid movements was in sharp contrast with Sakura's Strong Fist style. The forms she learned from Lee and Might Guy seemed at odds with her small frame until, with a great yell, she broke the tree in two and watched it fall over.
They had been at it for a good two hours, and it was getting late. As Sakura walked over, wiping sweat from her forehead and tying back her hair with a ribbon, she said, "You ready to get your ass kicked, you two-timing bastard?" The grin on her face contrasted with her words, and Naruto was worried she would break him like that tree.
"Okay, Sakura, but what is two-timing?" he asked, never having heard that phrase before.
"Oh, shut up and fight," she said, taking a swing at him that would have taken his head off if he hadn't jumped out of the way.
This spar was quickly turning into an all-out fight as she attacked him with all her might, and he deflected many of her blows before countering with his own attacks. They traded blows for some time, neither willing to back down.
Then, with a lucky grab, Naruto grabbed her leg as she tried to kick him, and he inadvertently threw her off the cliff. Worried he had done something really stupid, he ran over to check, only to find her running up the cliff face with murder in her eyes. Leaping back, he ran to the middle of the field just in time to block her vicious attacks.
Naruto had always been lucky, but this time his luck had run out. With a quick leg sweep, she sent him crashing to the ground. Straddling him, she unleashed her fury, pounding him with wild abandon. Her fear of losing him had ignited a storm of violence within her, a storm born from a lifetime of pain and abuse. Raised in a home where love was synonymous with suffering, she knew no other way to express her emotions.
As she rained down blows on Naruto, flashes of memories invaded her mind. She saw her mother's twisted smile as she whispered, "I love you," while her fists landed on her small body. Her father's drugged voice echoed in her ears, saying, "Tough love makes you stronger," as he struck her again and again. These painful memories fueled her fury, driving her to unleash her pent-up anguish on Naruto, the one person she feared losing the most.
The ancient family scrolls had revealed the truth: their kekkei genkai thrived on pain, anger, and the raw power of rage. Yet, understanding the source of her agony did little to dull its sting. Each blow inflicted upon her by those who should have shown her love only served to fuel the fire within, a burning rage that she now wielded as a weapon.
"Whoa there girl, no need to kill him now is there," said Jiraiya as he lifted her off Naruto as she kicked her legs, and he held her high in the air before sending her flying with a little wind jutsu to cool off in the river below.
Pulling Naruto to his feet Jiraiya looked him over, "What did you do now to piss her off." he asked assuming it was Naruto's fault.
"I have no idea, I swear," said Naruto as Sakura came back up dripping wet, her eyes had changed into two white hot flames.
"NO IDEA," she yelled, stomping back over.
"That… that idiot came home drunk and talked about kissing the Yamanaka bimbo squad AND Gaara of the Sand wants him to marry his sister," huffed Sakura, daring either of the two men to tell her to calm down.
"Sounds like you had one hell of a night," said Jiraiya, pulling out his little book and making some notes.
"Don't you downplay this," said Sakura, grabbing the older shinobi by the arm and pulling him away so she could whisper in his ear.
"You need to give him 'The Talk'. He watched someone have sex in the bathroom and didn't even know what was going on," whispered Sakura to the wide-eyed Sannin, who turned to look over at Naruto, still trying to get his clothes back in place.
"No, that can't be," Jiraiya said.
"They kicked him out of sex ed and he doesn't have any guy friends to talk about such things, so yeah, it's up to you as his sensei," said Sakura, crossing her arms and glaring up at the tall man as water dripped off her long hair and he watched a drop of water trace a path down her flushed cheek.
"Oh, fuck me," said Jiraiya, thinking about how much fun this is going to be.
"Not in a million years, old man. But go do your job. I am going home," said Sakura, joking with him before running off to find some dry clothes and then go looking for Ino and have a little talk with her about the bimbo squad.
"What was that all about?" asked Naruto walking over to join Jiraiya as the old man pulled out a notebook and started writing.
"What was the name of that old academy sensei you keep talking about?" asked Jiraiya thinking it would be best to get someone who has done this before to talk to Naruto.
"Iruka sensei, why?" said Naruto rubbing the back of his head causing some of the loose dirt to fall.
"You and I are going to have a little talk with Iruka," said Jiraiya as he put his book away and took Naruto by the back of his jacket, leaping off the cliff.
Hours later, in one of the academy classrooms, Naruto sat at a large table with Iruka and Jiraiya. A dozen books, mostly picture books, were open and spread out on the table, all depicting drawings of naked people with arrows pointing out the most important parts. They had gone over every detail multiple times, but Naruto just couldn't believe what they were saying; to him, it felt like a prank.
"Are you sure that is how it's done? I thought babies just came from the hospital," said Naruto, beginning to lose the last of his naivety.
"Yes, Naruto, I am very sure," said Iruka, who had been through this conversation with many innocent students over the years.
"But… doesn't it hurt?" said Naruto, pointing at one of the drawings.
"Oh, my boy, far from it. Once you get the hang of it, it's the best thing in the world," said Jiraiya, taking more notes and giggling as he went.
Iruka glanced over at Jiraiya, but he didn't dare tell the legendary Sannin to stop being so perverted. He was sure that if he said anything, it would only make it worse.
"Do you have any other questions?" asked Iruka. They had only focused on the act itself, leaving out all the really important parts like STDs and how foreign shinobi would use sex as a way to spy or even kill a target. He didn't think Naruto could handle that part of the lesson just yet.
Just shaking his head Naruto just looked dazed, confused and in need of Ramen, ramen would make the world normal again.
"Hey, Iruka Sensei, how about we all get Ramen?" said Naruto, pushing all these thoughts out of his mind. He would think about this later, but for now, he would just try to be his old self.
"OK, sure, it's been a long day," said Iruka, looking around and noticing that Jiraiya had jumped out the window as soon as the word ramen was spoken.
…
While Naruto was learning about the birds and bees Sakura had gone home to change before she went looking for Ino. She went looking for the tall blonde at the only place she knew she couldn't run away from.
As she stormed into the flower shop, her expression was tight with barely concealed anger. Ino, behind the counter, looked up with a cheerful smile that faltered when she saw Sakura's expression.
"What's wrong, Sakura?" Ino asked cautiously, playing dumb not knowing what Sakura knew or didn't know.
"What's wrong? I'll tell you what's wrong!" Sakura snapped, marching up to the counter. "I heard about what you did with Naruto last night at the club."
Ino's eyes widened in surprise and then quickly narrowed with defiance. "I don't know what you're talking about," she said, trying to sound innocent even as she kept the counter between her and Sakura.
Sakura scoffed. "Don't play dumb, Ino. You got Naruto drunk and then you and the bimbo squad kissed him and who knows what else, didn't you?"
Ino's expression shifted from defiance to guilt, but she quickly recovered. "So what if we did? Naruto's a big boy, he could have left if he wanted to and he didn't."
"That's not the point!" Sakura exclaimed, her frustration bubbling to the surface. "You took advantage of him, Ino. He's vulnerable and doesn't know how to deal with any type of affection, you just used him for your own amusement."
Ino bristled at the accusation. "We didn't take advantage of him. We were just having fun. You know, fun Sakura, that thing you do when you're not training or acting like an unhinged lunatic. "
Sakura shook her head in anger. "Fun? Is that what you call it? Making out with a guy who's too drunk to even know what's going on? That's not fun, Ino, that's just pathetic."
Ino's cheeks flushed with anger. "Who are you to judge me, Sakura? You don't know anything about what happened between me and Naruto while you were chasing after Sasuke. What about him, huh? Why did you stop shaking your ass at him? You found out that Naruto is an easier target for your manipulation?"
Sakura's eyes narrowed her own anger flaring. "I know enough to know that you're no better Ino. Using Naruto's feelings to satisfy your own selfish desires."
"Selfish! Me, I am the most caring person you will ever meet, you crazy bitch!" yelled back Ino pounding her fist on the counter between them.
"I may not know what happened between you and Naruto but I do know one thing, You don't know either. I know how my family jutsu works and you have no clue what happened," said Sakura with both hands on the counter between them she leaned over to almost touch Ino forcing her to back up.
Ino's jaw clenched, but before she could respond, Sakura turned and stormed out of the flower shop, leaving Ino to grapple with her own question of guilt and anger. The vase full of flowers that smashed into the door frame only punctuating her anger.
….
After taking a good long walk around the village to calm down, Sakura stopped to look at the remains of her old home before heading back to the little apartment. Seeing a light on in the apartment window as she walked down the street she prepared herself to talk to Naruto. Her emotions slowly built up again as she walked up the stairs. 'Why, why why.' were the only thoughts in her head as she reached the door. Pausing at the door she took a deep breath, before opening the door.
She needed him, why didn't he see that, everything they had gone through together, to just stop chasing her didn't make any sense. Had she done something, was it her looks, her hair, her figure, what changed were all thoughts racing around as she opened the door.
"Sakura," said Naruto from the small table next to the kitchen, he was playing with an empty ramen cup as he waited for her to walk in and close the door.
"Naruto…. Are you OK, can we talk" said Sakura, moving over to stand behind the other chair at the table but not taking the seat as she waited for his response.
"Yes…. " paused Naruto before looking up at her, "We need to talk," he said waving at the chair she was standing behind as if telling her to sit.
As soon as she took the offered seat she started, "I just wanted to say…. I am sorry, I really am. I don't know what came over me in training, I …. God Naruto, I never meant to hurt you, I swear."
"I know Sakura, and it's OK, that is what training is for, if you hold back then you're just going to make yourself not stronger," he said as the training today was the last thing on his mind. All the things that Iruka sensei had said were still causing chaos in his mind.
It wasn't what he said about sex or even the process of birth that was bothering him, no, it was all the things he said in between the lessons and at the ramen stand. Things about love, respect, honor, and the biggest of all devotion, those were the things on his mind now. Did she have any of those things for him, did he for her?
All her talk about need, and want didn't fit into Iruka's story of how a relationship should be. Jiraiya's stories about lust and desire, of the endless search for something to hold onto fit into Jiraiya's view of the world. Was that what he wanted, or was it the bonds and commitment Iruka spoke of?
"Then we are good then? You're not upset with me?", she asked now that he has absolved her of any wrongdoing.
"Upset, no but I was thinking that it would be best if you found a place to live, you know on your own." His words landed on the table between them like a dead bird as her mouth dropped open and she just stared at him. This was not what she expected after he had "The Talk", no she expected him to act shy or boorish, not to tell her to leave.
'God what is wrong with me, am I so bad he doesn't even want me' she thought as a whirlwind of emotions consumed her.
"No, no no no. I can't leave, I mean I don't want to leave, I want to stay here, I mean I want to stay here with you. Don't do this Naruto, I…. I need you, you know that.", she said in a stream of words falling over themselves as she tried to find the words.
"Sakura, I don't understand, you were chasing Sasuke, I thought you loved him, everyone thought you loved him and now you're living with me, it doesn't make sense.", said Naruto, taking a deep breath.
"I don't want to be second place Sakura, I want you to follow your heart, don't give up.", he added, thinking she just needed a push in the right direction.
"WHAT!" she yelled standing up and leaning over the table with a balled fist before turning away and walking into the living space.
"I… I can't believe you think I care for that psychopath, I told you it was my family's idea, not mine," she said with a controlled rage he had seen before and prepared to make a run for it if she lost it again.
"So you don't love Sasuke?" he asked, still confused after all the years of her saying she loved Sasuke.
Sakura stopped dead in her pacing and looked over at Naruto, was this about Sasuke, no it couldn't be, she had told him, and anyone who would listen she didn't care for the last Uchiha. Naruto was dense sometimes but he couldn't think she still cared for that bastard.
"Naruto," she said, walked over to stand right before him, close enough to reach out and touch him and that worried him more than it should.
"I do not love Sasuke, I never loved Sasuke, it was all some sick plan of my father, you got that," she said, waiting for him to nod his head.
"Good, now no more talk about me leaving, OK" she added thinking it was over.
"I still think it would be better for both of us if you had your own space, it's too crowded here and you're used to so much more.'' He added that last part thinking of the house she used to live in, a house he couldn't even dream of living in.
'More? More pain, more ridicule, and what space,' she thought, she had her old room and that was about it, if she dared wander into any of the other rooms she was more likely than not to be beaten
"Naruto, please, I have everything I need right here, I don't need anything more than this I swear," she said, still standing so very close as he looked up at her.
"Besides, like I said I need you, you know that, I can't live without you," she repeated as if he would believe her if she said it over and over.
"We all need each other Sakura, that is what a team is for but you survived when I was gone for a month and you can do it again, it's not like I won't be in the same village, we can still train and stuff," he said bracing for her reaction.
She froze staring at him, part of her wanted to lash out at him, to beat some sense into him, but the more rational part of her knew that was wrong no matter how much it would make her feel better.
'Come on Sakura, use that big brain of yours and come up with something.' she thought
"I have an idea, how about we, you and I, go look for a bigger place together? With that money you earned with that S-rank mission and what we can make when we get a new teammate we can afford a bigger place, you know a lot of our old classmates have moved out and are living together." She added that last part as a bold face lie but she knew Naruto didn't know anyone from class and hoped he would just take her word for it.
"You mean like roommates?" he asked, a new place, a new bigger place would be nice if they could find any place that would take him. It would be nice to have a real bedroom, one for both of them.
"Well… if you want to think about it that way but…. " she said, not knowing how to say it so he wouldn't freak out or run away. She wanted more from him than what she was still working on herself but one thing she knew was she didn't want him hanging out with Ino or any of her cousins anymore.
"How else would you think about it?" he asked as Iruka had been very clear that marriage comes before anything else even as Jiraiya had burst out laughing at the old fashion ideas Iruka was using in his lessons.
"Let's say friends, really close friends, friends that don't go clubbing OK?" she said not wanting to use the word girlfriend as the last time she did he was so confused.
"OK Sakura, after training in the morning we can go looking but if we can't find anything I still think you need your own place.", he added as she turned to walk away.
…