Everything was wrong.
Hugging herself, Aqua followed Megumin and Komekko as they made their way toward the pipe's exit. Around her, the filthy sludge continued to purify slowly, though the flow was too fast for more than a small ring of clean water to form around Aqua. Everything about the disgusting liquid horrified Aqua, making her feel physically ill. How could the world be so sick as to produce such wrongness?
"They're sure to be watching the exit," Megumin said quietly. "Sending in a NyteTech drone means they at least suspect there are Crimson Demons here."
"What do we do?" Komekko asked. She sounded serious and calm, but her lower lip was quivering, and Aqua could sense the little girl's fear.
From Megumin, Aqua just sensed cold rage, and regret. And an entire ocean of grief.
"We'll try a flashbang, then jump out and surprise them. Hopefully, we take a few with us before we're cut down," Megumin said, hefting Gram.
"What!? That's a terrible plan! I'm not going along with any plan that gets you killed!" Aqua declared. "Even if I could bring you back to life, which I can't without more prayers, I'm not letting you die!"
"Aqua, they have us cornered. We can try and fight our way out but," Megumin looked down at Komekko, and Aqua saw nothing but pain in her red eyes. "You and Komekko try to get free while I fight. Find Yunyun. Stay alive. For Our Eyes and Blood."
"No! I'm not leaving you!" Komekko wailed and grabbed onto Megumin, hugging her tight.
"You have to! I'll catch up, OK?" Megumin said, hugging her sister fiercely.
Aqua didn't know what to do, but hugs were good, so she stepped forward and wrapped both girls in a hug. "Don't you have any spells or skills that help? Crimson Demons know all kinds of magic…"
"I told you, I don't KNOW any magic!" Megumin snapped. "No one does!"
"That's impossible, you have to have SOME skills," Aqua sniffed, and grabbed Megumini's face in her hands. "View Status."
For a moment, Aqua thought her spell had failed, as no glow appeared around Megumin, showing her class, skills, level, and stats. Then she realized that most of the fields were totally blank, the aura that would normally show them off missing entirely. There was a field with Megumin's stats, but they didn't look like Crimson Demon stats at all. Yes, her intellect was very high, as was normal, but she had no mana at all, and the rest of her stats were focused around some sort of weird dexterity based melee build, only there were no skills to speak of. Not even basic proficiencies. It was as though Megumin wasn't even a resident of Belzerg at all, but rather one of the strange worlds that had no levels or experience.
"That's not right," Aqua mumbled, even as Megumin started to squirm and Komekko poke at Aqua. She let Megumin go and did the same to Komekko, and got largely the same result. Nothing but basic stats.
"This is all WRONG!" Aqua wailed, sinking to her knees and hugging Komekko to her tightly.
"Yes," Komekko sniffed. "Big Sis can't die! Not like…no! They have to be alive, they hafta"!
"Well I'm going to fix THIS," Aqua snarled, and her eyes suddenly glowed a deep blue as she called upon the very fabric of her own being. "Grant Status!"
It was a simple spell, one Aqua and the other deities had created for when they summoned heroes from another world. Naturally, such people were empty vessels, waiting to be filled. And as such, the gods were able to give them certain unique abilities and powers. Unfortunately, Aqua was rather lacking in such weapons at the moment, as she couldn't return to the Divine Realm with her very limited pool of Faith and Mana.
But she could use this simple spell, and start making the world right once more. It wouldn't be much, the advantage would be minor, but this she could do.
The two sisters gasped, as blue runic circles appeared around them. Aqua sighed, standing up and holding out her hands. Two cards appeared in them, each inscribed by divine hands to contain the very essence of the siblings. Normally, such cards were made by devices that an artificer made and a priest had to bless, but these would be special.
"There. That's better," Aqua said, holding out the cards. "Take them. Now you can have magic."
"What…what is this?" Megumin whispered, taking the card gently. "They just…appeared. What are they?"
"I like mine! It has my picture! Look!" Komekko said, holding hers up. In the picture on the card, Komekko was smiling mischievously, looking like an ordinary little girl.
Aqua smiled and nodded. "You look very cute! These are your Adventurer Cards. They will keep track of your XP, spells, all that stuff. You don't have anything now, but look! You have some unspent skill points. I'm afraid it's not much, but you can also take a class and gain access to the basic class abilities. Let's see…Komekko, you qualify for Arch Wizard! That's the class most Crimson Demon's take."
Komekko wrinkled her nose as if uncertain. "Are they good at fighting?"
"Of course! Arch wizards are some of the most powerful Adventurers! They use magic to support their allies and destroy their enemies! They're barred from Divine Magic, so no healing spells. But they can learn practically any other branch of magic, and they have the most mana and the best skills for improving their mystical might!"
"That sounds good, how do I do it?" Komekko asked curiously.
"Just touch here, and select Arch Wizard from the list of classes, then confirm it," Aqua explained. "We used to have to do special rituals for this, but the gods decided that it was too much effort, and besides, a card can be used on the front lines for a quick boost of power!"
"I…I can be a knight?" Megumin asked, blankly staring at her own list of classes.
"Huh? I mean, you don't have the Stamina to qualify for any of the traditional knightly classes like Crusader or Knight. But you're a Crimson Demon, you should just go with Archmage," Aqua advised.
Megumin put a hand to the hilt of the sword on her back, then shook her head. "I know how to use this. Maybe, if we had more time, or if it was just me…learning ancient and powerful spells to devastate my foes, devoting myself to power beyond reckoning…but, my sister is here. And you're here. I need to be able to protect you. What class lets me do that?"
"Well…" Aqua studied Megumin's skills and scratched her head. "Rune Knight is a class that uses swords and magic, but they rely more on strength. With your skills…I think either an Assassin or Spell Blade would be best…"
"I'm not just here to kill people. I'll avenge my people someday, but right now, I need to protect Komekko," Megumin said firmly. She stabbed her finger down. "I shall become MEGUMIN! SPELL BLADE AND WIELDER OF THE LEGENDARY GRAM!"
Megumin's card glowed, but nothing much more happened. She blinked and looked at Aqua, frowning. "So…now what? Did I learn some super skill or something?"
"Well, ordinarily, you have to have someone who already knows a skill to teach you. But, since I'm a goddess, I can grant you each whatever skill you have the points for. Komekko only has enough points for Basic Magic, but you can-"
"Lookit!" Komekko said, and waved her hand. There was a flash of light, and a black raven appeared. It let out a squawk, flapped a bit, then landed on Komekko's head, there not being anywhere better to roost in a sewer pipe. "I picked Summon Familiar! 'Cause that means I get a pet, right? Ima name him Hoost!"
"Uh, I guess she spent her skill points," Aqua said, scratching her head. "Summon Familiar at the basic level just lets you summon a mundane creature. Most people don't bother with it…it can do some useful things though. She can see through its eyes, or talk to it."
"RAWK!" the bird said and flapped its wings.
Komekko giggled. "Hoost says he wants to eat! Me too, Hoost. Hey, can I eat him? I'm hungry!"
The raven looked mortally offended and pecked at Komekko, who batted him away.
"Bad bird!"
"You could, but it wouldn't do you any good. You made him with your mana: at best eating him would get you a portion of it back," Aqua sighed. She turned to Megumin. "For you…I'm not sure what you should take…"
"There's a skill here called 'Shroud,' what's that do?" Megumin demanded, pointing to one of the skills that were listed on her card.
"Oh, that's a spell that lets you hide yourself or an object about your size from sight with a mystic veil. It won't work in direct sunlight though," Aqua said.
Komekko and Megumin exchanged a look. "We've never seen the sun."
"What?! How?! Oh, I have got to fix this world! What has happened?!" Aqua cried, tugging at her hair.
"You said Komekko can see through her pet's eyes, right?" Megumin asked, selecting Shroud as her spell. "I have an idea…"
Crash took a long drag off his e-cig, expelling the vapor out through his nose. He looked down at the sewer pipe below, then at his screen. Nothing on all the equipment. "Shit."
"I told you, I'm not going in there," Bandit said, spitting to the side. She adjusted her tactical webbing over her black body armor, rubbing it as if to scratch herself. She always did get itchy, the poxy bitch. "Red-eyed little fuckers took out the drone like it was nothing. That shit's expensive, but my hide's worth more."
"You'll go in if I say so," Crash snarled, lowering his e-cig and glaring at Bandit. "After losing the drone we need the chits. And Reds are worth a lot. Didn't even think there were any left after the pair we fragged a month back."
"Told you there were some brats with them," Coot said, not looking up from the scope of his rifle. The old man was lying on a ledge above the other members of the team, covered in a pretty decent chameleon cloak. "We're gonna have to go in and get 'em out. Told you the drone wouldn't work."
Crash and his crew were camped out on a slimy metal landing above the large septic pool below them. There were a couple of smaller pipes feeding into it, but the one they'd tracked their prey too was large enough for even a grown orc to fit into. Crash had sent their very advanced, and highly expensive, new drone in to scout and possibly bag their prey with minimal danger and effort. It had looked like his big payout after years of work was about to happen. But now, right at the end, everything was going tits up.
"Shut it. You never think ANYTHING will work," Crash snapped. He shoved his cig back into its pouch and clipped it shut, then grabbed his helmet and pulled it back over his head. "Remember, they're brats but they're Crimsons. They'll fight like hell. Don't eat a grenade from one like Cortex did."
"Don't tell me how to wipe my own ass and I won't tell you how to run your outfit. But I am NOT going in there. They have the drone now, which means they've got guns and explosives. We'll get murdered," Bandit argued. She pulled down her rebreather and scratched at her acne-scarred face like she always did when she was nervous.
Though he wouldn't admit it, Crash was spooked as well. Taking out a NyteTech drone with nothing but some improvised weapons? That was hardcore. There was a reason the bounty on Crimson Demons was so high, but so very rarely collected: people who weren't careful were likely to end up dead tangling with them. He'd started with a crew of seven when they'd caught the adults, and lost three with a fourth too injured to stay in the field. But these were just kids. Supposedly, easy meat.
Crash flexed his left hand, which was now metallic. He'd lost that when they'd killed what had to be these brat's parents a month back. It still ached all the time, but that was fine. Once they claimed the bounty on the brats, Crash would take it easy for a few years. Buy himself a woman who was prettier than Bandit, even if she was a wildcat in the sack. Man wanted to look at his lay after the deed was done and not feel disgusted with himself.
"Something on the sensors," Coot said. "Movement. Smoke or something."
Squinting at his screen, Crash wiped it with the back of his right hand, smearing the greasy surface further. "I don't see shit."
"I'm telling you, there was something. They're doing something," Coot said.
"Just wait, they'll come out. There's nothing in there but shit," Bandit urged. "Maybe we should call in some backup. This is NyteTech turf. They've got good corporate security."
"We do that and they'll take the eyes and our bounty, and there go our profits. Three-way split is plenty," Crash spat.
"Can't split if you're dead," Coot mused.
"Shut up or it'll be a two-way split and I'll spend your portion on a body job for Bandit," Crash growled. He heard an odd noise and looked up and around. Were those wingbeats? There might be some lamprey owls around here looking for a meal, but they wouldn't tangle with three well-armed freelancers.
"The fuck is that?" Bandit demanded, raising her rifle, her head jerking around.
"Put that down before you shoot me, you dumb bitch!" Crash said, slapping the barrel of her gun down.
There was a splash behind him, and Crash spun, looking into the pool. There were ripples in the water. "What came out?"
"I didn't see shit. So that's probably what it was," Coot said, his tone smug.
"You fucker," Crash said, though he exhaled out of his nose. Dammit, he did like these two. Sure, Bandit was ugly as sin, Coot was a pessimistic old cuss, but they worked well together. The Crimsons hadn't been the first bounties they'd bagged, and they made enough to live. With another big bounty, maybe he would get Bandit a body mod job. She was more than decent in the sack, plus she wasn't boring when she wasn't whining, so-
"TASTE THE FURY OF MY VENGEANCE!"
A sword sprouted through Bandit's sternum. She let out a puff of air, her eyes going glassy. Her gun dropped to the ground, and she sagged, held up by only the blade through her chest.
"FUCK! FUCK, OFF ME!" Coot bellowed as a raucous cry sounded. His rifle barked three times, but Crash wasn't paying attention.
Out of the darkness, two glowing red eyes appeared, attached to the figure who had just skewered Bandit. Crash snapped up his rifle and fired a three-round burst, but his shots were wide. Even though he knew in his heart that Bandit was dead, he wasn't going to shoot her if there was even a fraction of a chance of hitting her. Then the little girl with the sword yanked it out of Bandit, and rushed at Crash. He fired again, this time hitting her blade. But his bullets just bounced off the weapon.
"What the fuck!" Crash snarled, and fired again. His target dodged and threw something at him. He could only swear in panic as the bomb went off. He fell to the ground, bloody, blind, and deaf. It had just been a flash bang, but one of those going off in your face, even in tactical armor, wasn't good for your health.
He never saw the stroke that took off his head.
Megumin raised Gram, looking around for something else to try to kill her. There was a shot, and Megumin instinctively ducked. But it was just Komekko, who was lowering her makeshift gun after climbing out of the sewer pipe with Aqua.
"That's one for me!" Komekko said happily, shouldering her weapon and hurrying over. "Good boy, Hoost!"
"Rawk!" the raven said, fluttering down to the man under the stealth cloak Komekko had just shot. The bird had been distracting him, and was evidently hungry, as he started pecking at the dead man.
"They're…they're just people," Aqua said, clambering out of the lake below. Megumin did a double take. The water looked…well, like water now. Not like polluted sewage.
"They're Eye Hunters," Megumin said and holstered Gram. She took out a knife and knelt by the woman she'd killed. "Not people."
Komekko hurried over to her own kill, but Hoost was taking care of that, pecking out the dead man's eyes. Megumin quickly gouged out her own kills, then used the blood to write the symbol of her people on the ground: Two glowing red eyes.
"The price is paid," Megumin whispered. "Sleep well, mother, father. I…I'll take care of Komekko. I promise."
"What are you doing?!" Aqua gasped. "You can't desecrate the dead!"
"They do it to ours," Megumin said, standing up after she wiped her knife off on the Eye Hunter's pants. "So we do it to them. Quick, get the supplies off them Komekko, then we have to go."
"But they were just PEOPLE! Not monsters, not demons, or anything! They were all human! How…how could they work for the Devil King?" Aqua demanded.
"They didn't. They're just licensed mercs," Megumin grunted, going through the belongings of the dead. She took what chits and credits she found, along with rations and easy-to-carry electronics. She found a nice pistol and thirty rounds of ammo as well on the woman, pocketing those.
When Megumin turned back around, Aqua was crying over one of the bodies, smoothing the hair out of the now eyeless face of the dead woman. Megumin had overheard her name through Komekko's weird raven-drone thing, but she didn't care about the names of Eye Hunters.
"Why are you so upset!? Didn't you hear? THEY KILLED MY PARENTS! They would have killed Komekko! They would have killed YOU! Let this scum reap the harvest they have sown, and let their corpses rot on the plains as crows feast upon their eyes!"
"Hoost is a raven though, not a crow," Komekko said, her bird once more perched on her head as she came over. "He gets very offended if you mix them up. He says crows are dumb and small."
"Well, I'll make sure to feed him as many eyes as he wants," Megumin promised. "Now we have to get out of here before- Dammit! Take cover!"
Megumin grabbed the only slightly torn chameleon cloak and hid under it with Aqua and Komekko as the sound of an air car's engine echoed through the small space. A moment later, a bright light stabbed through the darkness and the brief wail of a siren.
"Corporate Security!" a male voice blared over a loudspeaker. "Everyone freeze- Oh shit. What the hell happened here?"
Megumin hugged Komekko tightly as the air car set down, and a moment later she heard boots clanging off the metal walkway.
"Fuck me, these are those mercs that came through. What tore them apart like this?"
"Shit, look at their eyes! They were Eye Hunters! There's demons around here. Run a scan, maybe-"
Megumin and Komekko rose up together. Komekko drew a bead on the corpo still in the car and let loose with two round bursts. She didn't do more than wing him, but her shots made the pig cry out in pain as he fell back into his squad car.
Megumin raced forward, swinging Gram in a wide arc. She sliced through the corpo's hand as he tried to bring his pistol to bear on her, then followed through with a slice through the neck. She didn't take the man's head off, but she did slice his jugular, and he was down and dead, though it would take a minute or so. She ran forward to the car, where Komekko was pinging shots off the windshield to keep everyone's head down. She rammed Gram into the man's side, then kicked him out of the car.
"GET IN!" Megumin screamed to Komekko and Aqua. "More will come!"
"How can you just kill them!" Aqua wailed, scrambling over with Komekko and the familiar, all of the piling into the car.
"Pretty easily, they're not exactly our first," Megumin grunted. She paused before getting into the car and struck a pose. "Know that this is what happens to all who oppose the Crimson Demon Clan! FEAR OUR VENGEANCE!"
Then she got in the squad car. It was still on thankfully, and she hastily piloted it up and out of the pit.
"We'll have to find somewhere to hide," Megumin said as she yanked up on the control yoke. "Killing corpos is always a pain in the ass."
"I brought the food!" Komekko said around a mouthful of ration bar, and handed Megumin one. Aqua was still blubbering, but she'd followed and was just sort of laying in the other seat. Komekko, being familiar with Megumin's driving habits, was already buckling her webbing.
"W-why did we have to kill them?" Aqua sniffled. "That was a half elf and a dwarf! They weren't evil, just mortals!"
"They work for NyteTech!" Megumin snapped as she slammed the throttle forward, causing Aqua to squeak in panic as she was slammed back in her seat. "They make the weapons and hardware used to hunt Crimson Demons down! If they found us, they'd kill us and collect the bounty themselves! You're pretty, so they'd probably, you know, let you go if you let them…do things to you…"
"And that's why we carry suicide bombs," Komekko told Aqua, who was now slumped on the floor as Megumin raced up a ventilation shaft. "Mommy says that's a better way to go."
Megumin dodged around protruding piping and dangling wires avoided suspicious looking patches that might conceal ambushes and put on more speed. It couldn't be long before the car got locked down and the corpos realized their goons were dead and sent back up. Until then, she needed to find somewhere to hide, and if possible, someone to sell the car to to be stripped so she could get some trade.
"Where's a good chop shop around here," Megumin muttered out loud, taking the car through a large vent and into a larger space between dilapidated highrises.
"I can help you with that if you promise to let me have a ration bar and not kill me!"
Megumin swore and nearly jumped out of her skin, while Komekko took the pistol and pointed it towards the speaker. That proved to not be necessary, as the person in question was a bedraggled looking blonde woman with handcuffs on, strapped into the back of the squad car.
"Who are you!? What are you doing here!?" Megumin demanded, slowing down the car's speed and keeping low. For now, she'd just look like some corpsec patrol fishing for bounties, but that couldn't last forever.
"Hi! I'm Cecily! I, uh, I was er…look kid, you're too young and too cute for me to tell you what I'm doing in here, but let's just say I haven't eaten since those nice pigs gave me some ramen, and that was a week ago. I've run out of tricks to turn except the oldest one, so I figured, what the heck?" Cecily said, shrugging and giving Megumin a helpless grin. "Turns out I still have a bounty on my head. Small one, but these guys were bored. They were about to…anyway, they took me when they got wind of a rumor of a couple of Crimson Demons, which I guess is you?"
"Don't try anything, Pale Eyes, or I'll frag ya!" Komekko threatened, pointing the pistol toward the security glass.
"No! Absolutely not!" Aqua snapped and touched the gun. "Ashes to ashes, rust to rust!"
The gun in Komekko's hand suddenly crumbled into a pile of iron oxide, causing Komekko to goggle at it for a moment before turning to glare at Aqua. "That was mine! Why'd you break it?"
"RAWK!" Hoost agreed.
"Guns are icky and not a part of my setting," Aqua huffed. She turned to Cecily. "You…you don't have anywhere else to turn to, do you?"
"Aqua, she's an OUTSIDER. Don't talk to her! We'll just kick her out of the cab at a few hundred meters and she won't be our problem!" Megumin snapped. Though she felt sick saying it. Crimson Demons weren't supposed to kill innocent people, but, well, who was innocent when you had a bounty on your head? Everyone was willing to trade tips on where to find Crimson Demons, so if someone saw your eyes, they had to die.
"Hey, hey! Relax, I'd never turn in a couple of kids," Cecily swore, but Megumin could tell she was lying. "Look, I know a chop shop near here. I, uh, I helped the owner…never mind. If we show up with a car he'll buy it off us. Just toss me a few credits and we're good, OK?"
"Megumin, can you open the little window?" Aqua asked, tapping on the security glass.
"Where's the shop?" Megumin said, not pressing the button and turning to glare at Cecily. She put the car into a slow forward hover, keeping the lights low. They were over a particularly dingy bit of slum, but Megumin didn't know the arena well enough to say whose turf they were in.
"Not far, here in ShopWiz turf! Just promise to let me go, ok? I hate the corpos too, I'd never rat anyone out. You killing those guys? Great stuff! They were probably not even going to feed me after…uh, look, you're cute but-"
"I know what rape is, OK? We grew up in the slums," Megumin said, though her face heated. She had a vague idea that it was bad and a complete violation of someone and that death was better, but she didn't actually know what it entailed.
"Cecily…are you…do you need hope?" Aqua said, holding a ration bar through the small window.
Megumin and Komekko both sighed at the waste of food, but Cecily eagerly took the bar and devoured it. "Thanks! I'm starving! As for hope, you can't eat it or sell it, so who needs it? I'm just trying to survive!"
"Set the carriage down, Megumin," Aqua said quietly.
"It's an air car," Megumin muttered. She frowned at Aqua. "What are you going to do?"
Aqua gave Megumin a sad smile. "People need hope. I…I can see I've failed. There are no more gods, are there? Just…this…poison. And machines. We have to start somewhere. We have to free this world."
Cecily gave Aqua an incredulous look, one that said, "I'm nuts but this bitch is crazy."
"Fine," Megumin sighed. "I can always kill her later…"
"No. No more killing. Not unless they're evil. You're not…you called it a corpo, right Megumin?"
"Huh uh, no way! I'm a nobody, not even ShopWiz would hire me!" Cecily vowed. Which meant she'd applied and been rejected. Everyone wanted a corporate job. Even a job cleaning putrid toilets or processing raw sewage was good if it was for a corporation. You wouldn't starve, and corporate security was more likely to not try to rob you. They might even help you if they were in a generous mood and whoever attacked you had a bounty on their head.
Megumin set the car down on top of a flat concrete roof that didn't have too many cracks in it. She kept her hand on the yoke just in case it gave way, or it turned out there was someone ready to ambush them to steal the car for themselves, but the structure held and no one attacked.
The concrete was stained and cracked, with bits of trash in the corners. A rusted old air conditioner that had long ago been stripped of anything useful sat on one end, while the sagging remains of a broken ladder showed where access had once been. Aqua hopped out and went over to the rear door, which Megumin popped open for her.
"Cecily, let me see your hands," Aqua said.
"Uh, OK. Look, I'll do chicks too if that's what you want. Just don't kill me, please! I'll keep my mouth shut, whatever you want! Everyone knows they can trust Big Sis Cecily, and-"
Aqua took the woman's hands, turning them over. Tears leaked down Aqua's face, and she shook her head. "Megumin, can you get these off of her?"
Megumin glanced at Komekko, but her sister already had a rifle at the ready, so she went over and used a chip she'd found in the car's cupholder to pop off the cuffs. Cecily rubbed her wrists and smiled nervously, first at Megumin, then at Aqua, obviously not certain what happened next.
"I can feel your hurts. You were beaten recently," Aqua said, touching a bruise on Cecily's cheek.
Now that Megumin got a closer look, she could see that Cecily was thin and haggard, her hair lank and greasy, her eyes filled with pain. Even her eyes were dull and listless. Sure, she talked fast and smooth, but Megumin felt a pang of pity. Sure, her life was miserable, but she'd had her family. Her sister and Yunyun, who was basically her sister, and her parents before…
Despite herself, Megumin hiccuped and started to cry. To her shock, Cecily reached out and patted Megumin on the head. "It's OK kid. I heard…the pigs were talking about how someone, um…well they said bagged, but I think they meant…did you know those other Red Eyes?"
Megumin nodded sullenly, jerking away from the touch.
"Chin up! As long as you're still kicking, it'll be OK! I dunno what happened to my mom, she never gave a shit about me. I hope…I hope your parents were good to you while you had them. That's what's supposed to happen and stuff, right?" Cecily said, smiling. Her teeth were yellowed and chipped, and by the sores on her gums, Megumin guessed Cecily had scurvy or something. She was dying, slowly. Like most people. Like the whole world.
"I can take care of your bruises, and the disease," Aqua said. "But…you have to do something for me. Promise me that after, you'll pray to me, OK?"
"Uh, lady, if you're gonna give me a medkit, I will do whatever you want. I lost a tooth yesterday, so I know what's up. The ration bar was good though, it had some vitamins or whatever, right?"
"Call me Aqua, Goddess of Water." With that, Aqua took Cecily's head in her hands again.
"Goddess of what? Are you some sort of WOAH!"
"Heal," Aqua said, and a blue glow washed over Cecily. After a moment, Aqua added, "Restoration. Muse's Reflection."
When the glow faded, a new woman was standing there. Cecily's lank hair now shone with luster, her skin had taken on a flush of health, her eyes shone with vitality, and even her cheeks weren't as sunken and hollow.
"What…what did you do?" Cecily gasped, but then she had to catch Aqua as the other woman sank to the ground.
"Out…out of mana…faith…please," Aqua whispered, her eyes fluttering closed.
Megumin instantly knelt, taking Gram and holding it up before her. "I thank Aqua, Lady of Heroes, for bestowing on me this blade. I pray for the souls of my parents, that they may find…find somewhere better than here."
"Thanks for the food, Aqua," Komekko added, and bit into a ration bar, before feeding a bit to Hoost, who squawked in appreciation.
Cecily slowly lay Aqua down, tears filling her eyes. "Thank you. I…I don't…thank you…I…I love you, Lady Aqua!"
After a few moments, Aqua was able to open her eyes and get shakily to her feet. "Thank you…I needed…I needed that. Cecily…do you promise to pray to me, every day? And give me offerings?"
"Whatever you need," Cecily swore, tears rolling down her face as she clutched Aqua's hand. "No one has…no one ever…thank you…"
"I mark you as my priestess," Aqua said, reaching up and touching Cecily's forehead. "Spread the gospel of the Axis Cult. 'Not even Aqua knows whether you will be happy in the future, so you should, at least, be happy now!'"
"I will. I'll tell everyone!" Cecily promised, nodding furiously and pocketing the card that had appeared in her hands. "I'll tell them there's a real goddess, not like those fakers in the Church of Serenity."
Aqua's eyes suddenly flashed. "Oh, Regina is still around, is she? Well, I'll show her that the Axis Cult is way better than her wackos!"
"Regina's real? I thought CEO Serena just made her up," Komekko said, frowning slightly.
"She's a real jerk is what she is. A goddess should make people smile! All revenge does is make everyone sad and miserable!" Aqua huffed.
Megumin turned to Cecily. "Look, we won't kill you…we'll give you some ration bars and split the profits off the car. Where's the shop?"
Cecily stood up. "I'll show you. You drive, I never learned how."
On the short flight over, Cecily peppered Aqua with questions like, "Are you really going to save the world?"
"Yes, I'll defeat these corporations and make the world right again! With pure water, clean air, and food and fun for everyone!" Aqua replied.
Megumin would have rolled her eyes if she hadn't seen Aqua make wonderfully delicious water. And the very thought of breathable air, free for everyone…that was the sort of deed worthy of the Crimson Demon Clan.
"What about like, being bad and stuff? Do we have to pay fines like the Church makes people?"
"If you feel bad, you've probably done something bad! Just say you're sorry and don't do it again, then do something nice for someone! If you forget that you were bad, so will I!"
"What about killing? Do you kill people if they wrong you?"
"No! The Axis Cult only fights demons and undead, and bad guys! We help other people!"
"Do you like, charge for healing and stuff? You could make bank!"
"Absolutely not! The gifts of the gods are free! So freely give them! Everyone should be happy, and how can you be happy if you're sick? Heal everyone, and then party to celebrate!"
Then Aqua started spouting life advice that even Megumin, young as she was, recognized as questionable.
"Sometimes, running away is winning! So if you can't win, just book it!"
"If you're going to regret it anyway, do whatever's easiest for you in the moment!"
"It's society's fault that things don't work out!"
They arrived at the chop shop, which was just a rusty garage hidden behind a fallen tenement building with various squatters living in the ruins. The only sign it was a garage at all was a landing strip that had been cleared, and a couple of thugs standing around at the edges.
"Who the hell are you?" one demanded as Megumin killed the engine.
"Hey, Francis, remember me? I'm Cecily!" the woman in question said, bouncing out.
"You're that bitch that sold me those chips that you said had the good stuff on them, but it was just naked pictures of you!" Francis, who was apparently a female dwarf despite the beard by the timber of her voice, cried.
"And boy did you get a deal? Still have that game leg? I see you didn't replace it," Cecily said, walking towards Francis as the other tough drew a cudgel. He was a tattooed male dwarf with a bright green mohawk, and when he grinned at Megumin, she saw nothing but black stubs of teeth. That was the sign of a mossbeer habit; a nasty, hallucinogenic alcohol that destroyed your mouth and guts. But, everyone died young anyway, so why not take a trip first?
"That leg is the only reason that you're not-" Francis began, but then Cecily took the woman's outstretched finger.
"Heal!" a much dimmer blue glow surrounded Cecily, washing over Francis' right leg.
Francis blinked, then slowly stood up straight. She stopped her foot a few times, then muttered, "Well I'll be damned. What did you do?"
"That is just one of the many amazing things that the Axis Cult can do, Francis! It's your lucky day! Not only did I bring you guys a car, for only the low price of 100,000 credits, but I brought you the Gospel of Lady Aqua!"
"A hundred thou for- no! But, what's this Gospel stuff?" Francis said. She jerked her chin towards the male dwarf. "Yo, Rocky, calm down. That was some good shit. I think we should buy this car."
"Yeah? You trust these tallies?" Rocky growled, fingering his cudgel. He'd driven bits of glass and rusty metal into it, making it a rather fearsome-looking weapon. Megumin wasn't worried though. Any Crimson Demon that couldn't defeat a dwarf in single combat unarmed wasn't worth the Red in their Eyes.
"I dunno…look the car over," Francis ordered. Then she turned back to Cecily. "Tell me more about this Axis stuff. Is it nanotech? That'd sell real well…"
"You just have to give prayers and offerings to the wonderful and glorious lady Aqua!" Cecily said. She paused, turning to Aqua. "Um, what sort of offerings?"
"I like booze! But some water will do if you don't have any. Just give me a sip or two at every meal! Big offerings on all the special holidays, like my Birthday! It's August 1st," Aqua explained.
"I got some booze here…" Francis said, taking out a flask from a pouch on her belt. "If you-"
"A glorious offering for the Lady Aqua!" Cecily said, snatching it away. She presented it to Aqua, bowing deeply. "A gift for you, goddess, from your faithful and bestest priestess, Cecily!"
"That was mine!" Francis roared, reaching for her own cudgel.
"A small price for fixing your leg, wouldn't you say?" Cecily prompted, batting her eyes.
"Well, I mean, I guess, but-"
"Great! So, you were saying 110,000 for the car, right?" Cecily prodded.
"Fuck me sideways, Francis, this is a real NyteTech corpo car! This is worth millions!" Rocky said, popping up. "Let's frag these guys and-"
"Hey, I see you've got bad teeth, I can help you too!" Cecily said. She ran over and grabbed Rocky's mouth, chanting, "Restoration!"
"What the fuuuuuu…." Rocky slowly reached up, touching his pearly whites. He sat down on the ground, hard. "What kind of…"
"Quickly, offer prayers and thanks to Lady Aqua! Promise to serve the Axis Cult, and I just know good things will start coming to you!" Cecily promised.
"I…no one's ever…" Rocky fell flat on his face, crying. "Thank you, Lady Aqua! I promise to offer you a sip of every mossbeer I drink from now on!"
"We can't give you millions for the car," Francis said, slowly squatting up and down. She shook her head. "Shit, a new knee is worth… look. I'll talk to the boss. We'll give you what cash we have. I'll get the crew started on this."
"We can't stay," Megumin said, touching her goggles to make sure they were in place. She and Komekko had put them on long before they landed. The corpos probably had their pictures, but no need to let these dwarves know what they were sitting on. A car was worth millions. A set of Crimson Eyeballs? A billion. Each.
"Yeah, OK. Just…I'll go get the boss. Rocky, start stripping it, it's got tracking on it. We'll have to move, but this score is worth it," Francis barked.
"Yeah, OK." Rockly slowly stood, peering at Aqua. "Are you…her?"
"I am Aqua, Goddess of Water," Aqua agreed. She had already drained Francis' flask, and pointed a finger at it. A trickle of water appeared and rapidly filled it up.
She handed it to Rocky, who took a sip. He immediately choked, coughing as he held it up. "What is…is that…water? But it tastes…how'd you purify it?"
"I made it," Aqua said with a shrug. "It's clean. Cecily can purify more, and if she levels up she can learn to create some on her own."
"Holy Mother of Bedrock," the dwarf swore. He kowtowed again. "Thank you, my lady. You…I don't know what you are. But I'll worship you. I'd worship anyone who could do that…"
Despite Megumin's hurry, they spent half an hour at the dwarven chop shop, during which time Aqua and Cecily healed every single one of the dwarves, including several children who came out of hiding. When Megumin finally dragged Aqua away, the car was already gone and the dwarves were packing up, but the Axis Cult had twenty new members. A few of the squatters had come out to see the commotion, and Cecily had gone over, preaching and healing the various illnesses and injuries they had. People that poor couldn't even afford a back alley hacksaw, let alone a corporate clinic with real meds.
"I feel better now," Aqua sighed. "It's only a few prayers…but they really believe…"
"Enjoy it while you can," Megumin told her, leading the way as Komekko ushered the goddess along. "Because once NyteTech gets wind of this, those dwarves are all dead."
No one stole from the corporations for long, Megumin knew.
She just hoped she could hide Aqua before they caught wind that someone was handing out for free what they rightfully sold.