Mike likes to think he's Harvey's closest friend, he even considers his mentor to be the older brother he never had, but deep down he knows that even if he means a lot to Harvey and the older lawyer cares deeply about him, he's not actually his best friend.
From the day he met Harvey and Donna he could tell there was so much more in their dynamic than a boss/secretary relationship. Over the years he's learned that Donna is the one person Harvey can't afford to lose, the person that means the most to him, and he's tried to help his friend to admit his true feelings more than once, only to have Harvey shut him down and tell him to mind his own goddamn business, so he eventually stopped trying.
Things are different now, he can tell, Donna's newest relationship is nothing like the ones she's had before. He's seen Donna and Thomas together and they look genuinely happy, he's also seen Harvey look at them together, and it doesn't take a genius to realize he wants Thomas' place desperately.
Mike knows better than to intrude, he knows better than to tell Harvey to wake the hell up and tell her how he feels before Kessler gets on one knee and ruins Harvey's chance forever. He wishes with every fiber of his being to be able to do that and help their friends be together, but he knows Harvey would only blow him off.
"Thomas Kessler called me today" Rachel tells him as she puts her things into her bag, getting ready to leave for work.
"Kessler? What did he want?" He asks his fiancé with curiosity.
"He wanted to get Donna something, and he knows I'm who knows her best" Rachel replies proudly but Mike scoffs. "What?"
"Rachel, I love you, but he'd never go to the person who knows her best, that's why he came to you"
"You mean Harvey?" She asks with a quirked eyebrow. "He's okay with him being in Donna's life, but I'm a girl and he wanted to get her something nice, that's why he came to me. You're seeing things" Rachel dismisses.
"If you say so" He simply mumbles, returning to his laptop.
"Mike" Her warning tone makes him look up at his fiancé. "She's happy, really happy for the first time in forever. Let it go"
"I just want them both to be happy" He shrugs.
"And he had over a decade to say something and he never did. So just drop it"
Rachel is right, he knows she is, doesn't stop him from wishing there's more he could do to help them realize they've always belonged together.
"Okay, you're right. I'll drop it"
"Good" She leans over and pecks his lips "See you at the firm" She takes her bag and walks out of the apartment.
Mike sighs and grabs the journal like every morning, after going through a few pages one particular article catches his attention and he smiles to himself. He might have just found a way to cheer Harvey up by keeping his head occupied tearing down the newest Deputy AG's impeccable record. He knows Harvey would never turn a challenge down and it would help him take his mind off Donna's blooming relationship with 'furniture guy' as Harvey so kindly calls him. He chuckles to himself at how much of an asshole his mentor can be and prepares to leave to work.
….
Mike's perfect plan backfires faster than he could have ever seen it coming. Andrew Malik is not only really good at his job, he also holds a grudge against Harvey for completely ignoring him when they worked together at the DA's office, the thing is, Harvey didn't even remember him. But Donna did, and she tried to warn him, Mike even ended up siding with her, but as usual Harvey didn't listen and he decided to go ahead in his quest to beat Malik.
It's not long until things get out of control and Harvey realizes Andrew Malik is as good as Donna and Mike tried to warn him he would be.
Just when they thought they had Malik and it was over, the bastard got all the evidence he needed to bury Harvey to the ground, and Harvey was handling it pretty well, until Malik got the one person he cares about the most involved.
"He's gonna subpoena the one other person who was there when you put Clifford Danner away"
Anger surges through him, and till now all he wanted was to beat this guy, to prove to him he was better, but now… Now it's personal for Harvey too.
"No" He says as he shakes his head. His usual instinct to protect her kicks in, because it doesn't matter that he's hers but she's not his, he'll always have the need to protect her against anyone coming after them. He'll sacrifice himself for Donna without giving it a second thought anytime.
"He's calling me to the stand in two days"
"Fuck" Harvey mutters under his breath.
"Then we need to get you prepared" Mike suggests "And we need to do it in front of an audience"
"If you're talking about a mock trial, you can forget it, I'm not putting Donna through that again" His tone is determinate, there's no way he's making her go through something like that again and there's no way he's enduring it again either. She would be questioned about their relationship again, he couldn't take it the first time, back when he hadn't even acknowledged his feelings for her, he can't see himself taking it now that he's admitted to himself how in love with her he is.
"Harvey, he is right and it has to be Louis"
"No" Harvey says. "You know what happened the last time—"
"Exactly, he was brutal and that's what Andrew Malik is gonna be like. It has to be Louis" She repeats and Harvey sighs but has no other choice than to agree.
…
Louis finds a way to stop Donna from testifying, arguing that them working on Clifford Danner's case together is work product and protected under privilege, but Malik wasn't talking about that case, he was talking about Coastal Motors and he makes Donna take the stand and he crushes her, and Harvey has to watch him do it feeling powerless and guilty for not having been able to protect the woman he loves from this.
"Donna, I'm so sorry" He tells her as he finds her outside of the courtroom, fighting tears.
"Don't" She snaps at him and he looks taken aback, so her gaze softens slightly "I just wanna go home, Harvey. I'm taking the rest of the day off"
"Okay, of course. Is your driver on his way? Because Ray's right outside, he can—"
"I'm waiting for Thomas" She interrupts "He's coming to get me"
"Oh" He simply says. With all the drama they've been through the past few days he almost forgot she was with someone now. And despite the hurt that it causes him, he's glad she at least has someone to go home to tonight. He would rather it'd be him, but he's glad she won't be alone anyway.
She looks at her phone and sighs in relief "He's here" She announces as she looks up at him "See you tomorrow Harvey"
"See you tomorrow" He says back and watches her walk away until he can no longer see her.
He goes back to the firm to find a way to beat this asshole once and for all and get back at him for coming after Donna like that.
Later that night, he's sitting behind his desk, looking out the window as he nurses a scotch, thinking about how Donna must be feeling and how her boyfriend must be comforting her. Maybe he ordered from her favorite place, maybe he's so perfect he even likes that Thai food that tastes like garbage but Donna loves. Maybe he's running her a bath, or maybe he's making her feel good in ways Harvey can only dream of making her feel.
"Harvey, how did it go? I can't find Donna anywhere" Louis says from the doorway of Harvey's office.
"That's because she didn't come back" He replies, still looking out the window "And it went bad" He adds before sipping on his scotch.
"What happened? Because obviously something went wrong"
"She asked you to protect her, you didn't want to and I should have known better and he crushed her" He has turned his chair to face Louis by now, who looks beyond surprised at Harvey's words.
"Malik?" Louis stupidly asks and that's it, Harvey snaps.
"Yes, fucking Malik!" He yells as he stands "He didn't ask her about Clifford Danner, he asked her about Coastal Motors"
"The memo" Louis says in realization "Harvey, we couldn't have seen that coming"
"What we could've seen coming is that he was gonna find the way to come after her anyway and twist the facts and imply awful things!" Harvey exclaims, beyond pissed.
"About you two?" Louis asks.
"Yes, about us! Cause it's always about us! Last time, this time and for god's sake it's not even true, no matter how much I—" He stops himself from blurting out his feelings for Donna to Louis for the second time in as many weeks.
"Harvey—"
"He made it look like the only reason I promoted her is because she slept her way there, and the son of a bitch made it sound plausible so it's on the record too. So thanks for helping us, Louis" He says more calmly but still definitely pissed.
"You can't blame it all on me, Harvey! You signed off on this as much as I did!" Louis exclaims back, now pissed at his partner too.
"I don't care! You should have known better! I'm backed against the wall with this case, I wasn't thinking straight, I relied on you to help us and I was wrong to do so"
"I care about her as much as you do, Harvey"
"That's just not possible, Louis. She's not the most important person in your life" Harvey says as he walks past his friend, not caring anymore if Louis knows how much Donna means to him. All he cares about is the one person he can't call right now because it's not his place to be there for her tonight. It's Kessler's.
…
Donna figures out Holly Cromwell is the one who told Malik about that memo but it was a dead-end because even though Donna begged her to help them, she says she can't.
Harvey finds her sitting in his office waiting for him and the moment he does he knows it didn't go well.
"Let me guess, she won't testify" He guesses as he sits opposite her.
"No, she won't, but I will"
"Donna, it can't be you" He tells her softly.
"Why not? my word is as good as hers and she admitted that she contacted him" She argues and he tries to find a way to tell her it's not without hurting her even more.
"In this situation, it isn't" He explains.
"You mean the situation where he made it look like I'd do anything for you because I—"
"I don't care what he made it look like, it's not true"
"Thomas asked me what happened, and I couldn't tell him the full story"
He's surprised at her words, she hasn't exactly told him much about her relationship, and he thought maybe she didn't feel she could confide in him anymore, at least not when it comes to personal matters.
"Donna—"
"I didn't want him to know what Malik did to me, the reason he came after me. I didn't want him to think that I don't deserve my position, I couldn't tell him how people are always assuming that you and I…" She trails off as she fights tears and it breaks him to see her like this.
"You deserve everything you have. No one deserves that position in this firm more than you do, and I'm sure Thomas is smart enough to have realized that by now. No matter how Andrew Malik tries to make it look like. I'm sure if you let him know what you're going through he'll understand" Harvey reassures her.
"I've missed this" She confesses then, the hint of a smile tugging at her lips.
"I've missed it too" He says back "You want me to pour you another one of those?" He asks as he points towards the empty glass of scotch on the table.
"That'd be nice Harvey" She tells him as he stands to get himself a glass and refill Donna's.
It's nice to be in her proximity like this, have some time just for themselves, and even if she can't give him what he truly wants, he'd rather be his friend than nothing at all.
They talk and they laugh for hours, and even if both of them know it's an illusion, for a couple of hours it feels like being them again. It's nostalgic too because they both know things are far from being back to normal and they probably never will, but they pretend not to care for a while, not to think about it and simply enjoy each other's company.
…
Beating Andrew Malik doesn't give Harvey the complete satisfaction he thought it would. He's glad they could finally put it behind them and Donna helped make that happen just like she wanted, making that asshole regret the day he met her.
She was so glad when he gave her the news, her smile alone made it all worth it. It was her eagerness to share that information with her boyfriend and celebrate with him that made it so bittersweet. He's happy they won, he's shuttered because he's not who she wants to celebrate the win with.
He stays late, nowadays he prefers to be in the office rather than stay home alone sulking, wishing for his lonely nights to be over someday.
That's how Louis finds him, typing on his computer, unaware of his partner's presence.
"Harvey, you have a minute?" He asks as he knocks on Harvey's door, making him look up.
"What do you want, Louis?"
"To apologize" He simply says "I already talked to Donna and we're good, but I want you to know that I'm sorry, and you're right. I should have protected her and I didn't because I couldn't bare the thought of asking her about you in front of a room full of people"
"We knew that would come up, she knew what you were gonna do in advance and she was ready to handle it" Harvey replies annoyed, too tired to hear Louis' lame excuses.
"That's what she said too, and I'm gonna tell you the same thing I told her. She was ready, but I wasn't… Because of Sheila"
"What? Sheila, your ex?"
Louis nods "She's getting married and I slept with her anyway" Harvey's eyes widen at his friend's confession. "I know how you feel about that and before you judge me—"
"I won't Louis" Harvey is quick to reassure his friend "My feelings towards infidelity are only mine to deal with"
"Thank you, Harvey"
"I still don't understand what that has to do with Donna though" Harvey says, confused.
"Well, I was writing down questions for Donna and I kept imagining someone putting my life on trial like that, so I took the coward's way out and I just couldn't do that to her"
"It's okay Louis, I understand. What did Donna tell you?"
"She understood too, and she forgave me" Louis says softly with a nod.
"Then all's good" Harvey replies.
"Thank you, Harvey" He says and looks away for a moment, his hesitancy and the look on his face doesn't escape Harvey's eye for detail.
"What is it Louis?" The managing partner asks.
"Ever since I left that hotel room, I've been stuck. We were together again, and… it felt so right"
"Louis, she's engaged" Harvey interrupts, trying to make Louis see that even if he would never judge his friend, what he did was not okay.
"I know, I know she's not mine but since then I've been counting the days until my soulmate marries someone else and walks out of my life forever"
"Louis—" Harvey tries to interrupt, because this conversation is suddenly hitting too close to home for him and it's not something he wants to discuss with Louis.
"It's too late for us, but it's not too late for you, Harvey, and I would never forgive myself if I didn't try for things to work out for you"
"What are you saying?" Harvey asks, fighting the lump on his throat.
"I should have told Sheila when I had the chance, and that's something I'm gonna have to live with for the rest of my life. What I'm trying to say is, don't let it get to that, don't watch the woman you love walk down the aisle with the man she's not supposed to be with. Tell her, Harvey, before it's too late"
Harvey is stuck, absorbing Louis' words and he knew his partner probably realized his feelings for Donna when he told him she was the most important person in his life, but hearing it so clearly, knowing what Louis is going through, makes it all so goddamn more real.
He knows Donna is his soulmate, she's his compass, the woman he loves more than anything and it would crush him to see her marry Kessler or anyone else, because it would bury any chance he could ever have at happiness. He can't live a happy life if Donna's not in it. And he starts thinking that Louis is right. Donna is not engaged, yet, but it probably won't take long for Thomas to ask her to spend the rest of their lives together.
If he still wants a chance to tell Donna how he feels and for them to be able to be happy, he should do something about it soon.
He is on autopilot as his feet start moving, she's all he can think about right now as he walks outside of his office and into hers.
Their eyes meet and she looks like she was about to walk out of her office, she halts and he moves forward.
"Harvey, good, Jessica just called and—"
He doesn't let her finish as determination takes over his whole body and soul and he plants his lips firmly against hers after twelve agonizingly long years.
It takes her a moment to react, but when she does sparks fly and he feels a tingling in his stomach when he requests permission to intrude her mouth with his tongue and she lets out a soft moan as he starts softly stroking his tongue against hers.
It feels so right that it should scare him but it doesn't even surprise him. Louis was right, he's the man Donna's supposed to be with, he has to be, because there's no way a kiss can feel this earth-shattering with anyone but the person you're meant to spend the rest of your life with.
He's kissed countless women before, Donna included, but it's never been like this with anyone, not even with Donna herself that first time because he didn't know what he wanted back then, that version of Harvey was infatuated with his beautiful secretary, but this version of himself is completely and irrevocably in love with the whole amazing package that is Donna Roberta Paulsen.
He's not sure if it's her or him, but all of a sudden kissing is not enough, they need more, and they end up pressed against the small round table in her office and he's standing between her legs while they eagerly explore their mouths and get lost in the kiss.
He wants her, there's no doubt about that in his mind, and he's pretty sure she's so far gone that she would agree to anything he asked right now, but beyond all desire, he loves Donna, and he can't do this to her, he can't turn the most loyal woman he knows into a cheater for his own selfish reasons.
So he suddenly realizes what he's done and he pulls away, their ragged breathing mingling as he holds the side of her head with one hand, his fingers tangled in her beautiful, soft red hair, he's always loved Donna's hair.
"Harvey" She breathes out and he shakes his head, knowing it's up to him to end this, just like he started it.
"I'm sorry Donna, I just had to know" He whispers as he lets her go and walks out the door in a rush, leaving a dumbfounded Donna behind.
...
A/N Well, here we are! I was a bit nervous about this one, but I hope I did it justice. Thank you all for the support and the lovely reviews, you guys are the absolute best!. Let me know what you think about this one :)