Chapter 2: Meet the Santiagos

(The Loud family pulls up to the Santiago house a few blocks from their own.)

Rita: "Well, we're here. Now, I want you all to be on your best behavior...for Lori's sake."

(Everyone gets out of Vanzilla, and Lori rings the doorbell. A hispanic woman in her late 30's answers the door.)

Lori: "Hi, Mrs. Santiago."

Mrs. Santiago: "Hola, Lori! We were expecting you all. Roberto...Ronnie Anne...they're here!"

(Bobby and Ronnie Anne come into the front room and welcomed Lori, Lincoln and their family.)

Bobby: "Hey, babe!"

(Lori and Bobby embrace.)

Ronnie Anne: (to Lincoln) "What's up, Lame-o?"

(Rita introduces herself to Mrs. Santiago.)

Rita: "Hi. My name is Rita."

Mrs. Santiago: "Soy Lydia."

Leni: "You're made of soy?"

Lana: "So when do we eat? I'm starvin'."

Bobby: "When my father gets here."

(In the kitchen, Rita and Lydia were talking.)

Rita: "So, Lydia...your husband sells used motorbikes?"

Lydia: "Oh, Si. Alex is rarely at home during the day. He's out a lot selling motorcycles to people across Michigan, but he usually shows up around dinnertime.

(Just then, they heard the front door open, and the guy from the commercial walks in.)

Lydia: "Speak of El Diablo."

Alex: "Lydia...you didn't tell me we were having company."

(Bobby introduces Lori and her family.)

Bobby: "Dad...this is my girlfriend, Lori Loud."

Lori: "Hi. Me and my family have seen your commercial."

Alex: "So you have? This is Alex Santiago saying, 'Remember my name, buy my bikes, and ride like men'." (laughs)

Bobby: "Her family is also here for dinner."

Lynn Sr.: "Lynn Loud, Sr. Pleased to meet you." (extends his hand)

Alex: "The pleasure is mine."

(Alex grabs Lynn Sr.'s hand with a very strong grip.)

Alex: "I guess I don't know my own strength sometimes."

(Just then Alex notices Lily in Rita's arms.)

Alex: "And who's this little senorita?"

(Lily immediately starts crying.)

Bobby: "That's Lori's baby sister, Lily."

Alex: "I take it she doesn't like me?"

(After 10 minutes, dinner was ready. The Louds and the Santiagos were all at the table eating the feast that Lydia prepared, mostly consisting of tacos, enchiladas, beans and rice, etc..)

Rita: "Oh my god! These tacos are delicious. How do you make them so good?"

Lydia: "Gracias, Rita. I studied culinary techniques in Cancun, and since then, I've never cooked better."

Luan: "Wow...is there anything else you guys wanna taco 'bout?" (laughs)

(Silence.)

Lynn Sr.: "So, Mr. Santiago...my daughter tells me you're into motorcycle sales."

Alex: "Come on...Mr. Santiago was my father. Just call me Roberto Alejandro Martinez-Millan Luis Santiago, Sr.."

Lynn Sr.: "Oh my god...we're both Seniors!"

Alex: "Why, yes we are!" (laughs while patting Lynn Sr. on the back very hard)

(As the Louds and Santiagos were chatting, Lincoln noticed that Ronnie Anne looked upset.)

Lincoln: "Ronnie Anne? What's wrong?"

Ronnie Anne: "Nothing, lame-o."

Lincoln: "Doesn't look like nothing."

Ronnie Anne: (sigh) "I'll tell you later."

(After dessert, the Louds and Santiagos went into the living room to watch some home movies of Bobby and Ronnie Anne when they were younger.)

Lydia: "And this is Roberto in his burro costume."

(Lydia showed a photo of Bobby as an infant wearing a donkey costume. Then Lydia showed another photo with young Bobby and baby Ronnie.)

Lydia: "And here is Roberto holding baby Ronnie for the first time."

Lori: "Eeeeeeee! That is literally so cute!"

(Lydia showed one more picture of Baby Ronnie making a mess with some refried beans.)

Lydia: "And this is Ronnie's first mess with her food."

(Lincoln chuckles at that picture.)

Lana: "I can relate."

Lola: "You would, wouldn't you?"

(Bobby and Ronnie Anne were feeling quite embarrassed.)

(When they were finished, the Louds prepared to leave. However, Alex wanted to talk with Lori alone, while Lincoln went to talk to Ronnie Anne upstairs.)

Alex: "So, you're attracted to my son. No?"

Lori: "Yes, sir. He's very handsome."

Alex: "I've been teaching Junior how to be a man since he was little boy, and now he's gotten himself hooked, and I'm proud of him. You got a job?"

Lori: "I work at Gus' Games and Grub, but my dream is to become a CEO of a major company one day- or at least, a co-CEO."

Alex: "Ahh, a woman taking a man's job...that's nice. You'll do great- just like my wife."

Lori: "Thanks, Mr. Santiago."

(Then Alex asks a strange question.)

Alex: "Have you ever touched my son?"

(Lori blushes.)

Lori: "What?"

Alex: "You know what I mean...wanting to reach in his pants and go exploring inside them?"

Lori: "Eww, no!"

Alex: "Alright, good...because if you do, you have to deal with me." (laughs)

(Lori didn't know how to respond, but Bobby, who had overheard, showed up.)

Bobby: "Dad, that's enough!"

Alex: "Whaaat? I was just joking around! I'm glad you got yourself a woman to call your own."

(Bobby just frowned.)

Bobby: "Just head back to the van, babe. I need to talk to my dad."

(Meanwhile, Lincoln was talking to Ronnie Anne upstairs about her attitude.)

Lincoln: "So, Ronnie Anne...what's the matter?"

Ronnie Anne: "Do you really want to know?"

(Ronnie Anne lifted her hoodie to show her back, and it had marks on it.)

Lincoln: "Oh my god! Who did this?"

(Ronnie Anne got teary eyed.)

Ronnie Anne: "My...dad."

(Lincoln was shocked at what Ronnie Anne said.)

Lincoln: "Why?"

Ronnie Anne: "He lost an important buyer from the dealership."

Lincoln: "So he chose you as his target?"

(Ronnie Anne nods and cries on Lincoln's shoulder.)

Lincoln: "Does your mother or Bobby know about all of this?"

Ronnie Anne: "My mother and Bobby are too afraid to intervene."

Lincoln: "Look...I've intervened with Lynn and Lucy's spat before...maybe I can talk some sense into your dad."

Ronnie Anne: "You can't...my dad is nothing like your sisters."

Lincoln: "Ronnie Anne-"

Ronnie Anne: "Please don't tell anyone about this."

(Ronnie Anne shoves Lincoln out her room and shuts the door. Then Lincoln begins to ponder the situation.)

(Lincoln heads back downstairs to join the rest of the family in getting ready to head back home. As he was on the ground floor, he stops and turns to the readers.)

Lincoln: "Well...this is really disturbing. I've always wondered what turned Ronnie Anne into a bully...but not anymore."

(Bobby was apologizing to Lori about his father's behavior.)

Bobby: "Sorry about my dad, babe. He's just in one of his moods."

Lori: "It's alright, Boo-Boo Bear. You did stand up for me back there. That's what a handsome knight in shining armor does." (kisses Bobby on the lips) "That guy was a creep, anyway."

Bobby: "See you tomorrow, babe! Love you!"

(The Loud family gets in Vanzilla and head back home.)

What do you think of this revelation? Do you think Lincoln should keep his mouth shut or do you think he should tell someone about it?