Reviews:
RenaTamer: The Spartan armor was one of the first things that came to mind, but that shit needs more training than Helljumper armor.
DinoholderX: Possibly.
LexiconHuka:
Gallan: Dammit, Pinks! How many times have I told you to stay out of there?
ShiningShadow1965: Don't rightly know until I type it. Or RenaTamer sends it to meh. I make this shit up on the fly.
Author's Note: Introducing a new thing for my stories; Co-Author Notes!
Co-Author's (You) Note: Hi all, as Jak3 said, he wants me commenting on MIE. and though I see the story as his alone... I'm not going to argue. First and foremost, yes I am that RenaTamer, the creator of Axel n Rena, and Ginoa's tails. second, again this is Jak3's story, yet if you feel the need to drop me a line, PM me...
as for my notes, the shit is going to hit the fan and there maybe more referencing from the game world, Jak3 and i somehow have a liking for the same games (Long live John 117)
"Well, I think ol' Sunbutt deserves a kiss when I get back." I happily said as I started getting suited up in my 'authentic' ODST armor. Hell, she even made the goddamn helmet! "How strong is the armor?"
"Made out of pure titanium." Max answered. "Only thing that can get through is magic and dragon fire."
"Fiddy rounds?" I asked as Apple helped me with the back, her wings buzzing like a dragonfly.
"Depends on where it hits." He answered. "Calves and forearms are less protected when compared to the torso and head."
I would have said something, but somebody in the medical tent took the opportunity to start screaming. In fear or pain, I didn't know.
It took me about twenty seconds to pull the gift that Lunacae made for me out of another box (DMR that takes 5.56mm bullets) and rush the fuck out of there. I wasn't surprised that anyone who saw me was confused as fuck, but I didn't care about that. Instead, I hauled ass towards the tent holding the screaming bastard, Apple clinging to a shoulder guard.
And before you ask; I couldn't run any faster nor did I feel stronger. It was just a boost up from my usual armor. I did, however, have a HUD that linked with the rifle in my hands, so that was a plus. Also had a health bar, to boot. Add in an air conditioning spell and I was one happy 'ODST'.
"Who's fucking screaming?!" I demanded once we burst through the flaps, weapons at the ready. I had found out really quickly that the DMR would take M16 magazines, probably on the suggestion of Max or Anon.
"It's Thompson!" A mare yelled, struggling to keep him down. "He just woke up screaming bloody murder!"
"Fucking goddammit, I was right!" I hissed, running over to him and kneeling. "Thompson, listen to me." I ordered as I grabbed his shoulders firmly. He looked up at me with watery eyes, tears streaming down his cheeks.
"I-It hurt..." He whimpered. "So much goddamn pain..."
"Shhh..." I gently said, holding him closely against my armor. "It's alright... You're safe now..."
"Who was it, Doc?" Anon quietly said.
"P-P-P..." He couldn't get her name out, but Anon winced anyway.
"Goddamn..." He sighed. "No wonder he's like this..."
"Go talk with Max, Anonymous." I told my double. "Tell him what you believe Doc went through, while I calm him down."
"Aye aye." They said, and stepped off to the side. I overheard Anon telling Max about something involving cupcakes, before turning my attention back to Doc.
At that moment, Gallan stepped in with his BAR pointing at the ground. If I wasn't wearing my helmet, I think the scream that came from Doc would've burst my eardrums.
"GET HIM AWAY FROM ME!" Doc shouted, and before we could react (his scream was similar to a flashbang), he ripped my pistol from a magnetic clamp on my thigh and fired a bullet at the man. Thankfully, he missed.
"CALM THE FUCK DOWN!" I yelled, grabbing his wrist. The next shot didn't miss, but thankfully only embedded a bullet into Gallan's leg as he backpedaled out of the tent, landing on his ass outside.
"I'LL KILL YOU!" Doc roared, struggling to get me off of him.
"Somebody fucking knock him out, goddammit!" I shouted, struggling to disarm the crazed man. It took three death guards to get him down with my help and another to cast a spell on him to knock him out.
"Seems that it featured Gallan on him or something..." Anon muttered as I disarmed an unconscious Doc.
"Now." I grunted. "What. The FUCK. Happened to him?" I all but growled.
"He featured in a grimdark fanfiction that starred Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie." Anon answered. "In the original version, it also featured Applebloom as Pinkie's apprentice or something, about to do to Silver Spoon what Pinkie did to Rainbow Dash."
"And what in the hell happened to Dash?" I asked, folding my arms.
"It's better to let you read the fanfic for yourself. I have it saved on my laptop." He said, before shrugging off his backpack and putting the mobile computer onto a table after moving blood packs to the side. "I know a few people who've vomited while reading this, but that's mostly because they're squeamish." He added as we waited.
A typed password and some moving later, I was reading a fanfic dubbed 'Cupcakes' out loud, much to the disgust of everyone in the tent.
"...Applebloom grinned and open her mouth 'Hey, Silver Spoon, guess who gonna be a blank flank?'...Jesus Christ." I finished, as Max came back over from gagging at the description of Dash having her internal organs ripped out. "Well, I'm glad that I didn't have that goddamn fanfic as a dream." I said in disgust, pushing the laptop away.
"I can understand that." Max coughed, wiping some bile from his mouth. "Still, I pity Doc for what he had to go through..."
"All I want to know is where Gallan comes into play with this whole thing..." I muttered, taking off my helmet and pushing a gloved hand through my hair with a sigh.
"The only thing I can think of is that he helped Pinkie dissect either Rainbow Dash/him, or both." Max finally said. Gallan took that moment to pop his head in cautiously.
"Is it safe, or am I allowed to shoot back?" He asked, looking around the room. Upon seeing Doc lightly (at Anon's 'insistence') tied up, he sighed in relief and limped in.
"Couldn't you get a unicorn to pull it out?" I asked. He rubbed the back of his head and grinned a little sheepishly.
"All of the guards are either securing the perimeter or handing out relief supplies." He explained. "I didn't want to interrupt him when I could just get someone else to pull the bullet out with a pair of tweezers."
"We don't have any sterile tweezers around..." I said after a moment, before sighing and turning into Sand Dune. To my surprise, the armor changed with me.
"Why'd whatever type of armor that was do that?" Gallan asked as I moved over to his leg, making him take a seat with a pained grunt.
"Because Sunbutt knows I'm not just human anymore." I answered, pulling back his pants so I could get better access to the wound. "Hell, so far there's three of us that can do this, and I have a theory that I want to test when we get back, since I noted that every human had to come." Anon let out a nervous chuckle at that.
"What's the theory?" Gallan asked, hissing in pain as I dragged the bullet out carefully. I had to wait to explain, because I didn't want to fuck up and accidentally send the .45 out the other side of his leg. Or blow it off. I've accidentally done that before.
"Got it!" I chirped, dropping the bullet onto the ground, before looking at Max.
"What?" He asked, confused.
"Think about male Sunbutt." I said, confusing the fuck out of them.
"Why the hell would I do that?" He asked in confusion.
"Just do it." I pressed. He sighed, closed his eyes, and gained a constipation face.
A moment later, we were blinded.
"Goddamn..." Anon said once the lights filling our vision disappeared.
Standing where Max was is a male Celestia, looking at himself in confusion.
"The poison joke in your shampoo did this to you." I said, going human again.
"What does that mean?" Max asked, raising a eyebrow.
"It means that you have two forms, just like me." I answered. "Dawn told me that made me have another form as a guise to keep me from panicking."
"Did it work?" Anon asked as Max looked himself over, making sure nobody was fucking with him.
"He didn't need to." I answered with a grin. "I personally think Sand Dune is cool as all hell."
"How come? And you're fine with becoming a filly?" Max asked, looking at me.
"How many people do you know can shoot bullets out of a bone sticking from their forehead?" I asked with a raised eyebrow. Max muttered something before looking at me again.
"How do you get back in your human form?" He asked, pacing a little.
"I just think of my human body and here I am." I said with a wave down my body. His constipated face returned and another moment later (without flashbang effects) Max was human again.
"Right!" I said, clapping my gloved hands. "Let's get going, no?"
"Where the fuck did you get a Soviet accent?" Gallan asked as I helped him up.
"I can change them, mon ami." I said with a smirk, throwing a little French into the mix.
"Alright, alright." Gallan said, rubbing his face. "Stop using your fancy words all willy nilly."
"Let's get something to eat." I said.
[Later]
Crack.
A faint yelp of pain.
Crack.
Silence.
"Did you deliberately miss him, or am I going to have to grind your ass through ghetto boot camp?" I asked Duffy as I stood over him on a rooftop. The grunt coming from my foot told me that he was dicking around, and not degrading on his firing ability.
"How's it going?" Sparklebutt asked from behind us, while Duffy waited for another opportunity to end a militia's life. We weren't going for the more equipped warlord, yet, so we let him think nothing was wrong.
"Hot as hell out here, for one." I answered, not letting anybody know I had the most air conditioned suit in the entire group. Let me have a few luxuries, goddammit. "Both of us are also hungry and thirsty."
"Well, I brought some of the 'K Rations' that the survivors on that 'Crocodile' gave to me, along with some water." Sparky said. I grimaced but sat down and removed my helmet, pushing two of three water bottles over to Duffy.
"You need 'em more than I do." I told him, before cracking mine open and taking a gulp. After draining half the bottle, I opened the ration and ate my pork with distaste.
Goddammit, I've been eating them since I've gotten here, aside from the one MRE that Doc gave me.
"Meatloaf tastes like shit normally; imagine gubberment processed meatloaf that has to be chemically heated." -Mark on his least favorite MRE.