STAR TROT
Battle stations
Sitting behind his ready room desk, the Captain of the starship Fairy Fire carefully perused the day's duty logs, memorizing any changes to the crew shift rosters and any maintenance scheduling that could affect the running of the ship. Once completed he set the data-pad down and checked the desk's chronometer. "Looks like it's time to go to work," he smiled to himself as he stood and stepped out onto the gleaming bridge of his ship.
"Captain on deck," the First Officer called out, getting everyone to stand or sit at attention.
"Thank you Number One," Pip gave Luna a nod as she vacated his chair. After taking his seat he gave the room a once-over glance before asking for a report.
"Ensign Hooves is in the infirmary after a slight altercation with the food processor in the crew mass." Lt. Commander Luna stated while moving over to an empty seat next to the Captain's. "Other than that, we are running hot, strait, and normal."
"Hooves, huh, what did she do this time?"
"Seems she got distracted while ordering her meal and held the button for mash-potatoes and gravy for too long. The end result was an explosion in the forward crew's mess and 15 ponies were covered in mash-potatoes," he could tell she was trying hard not to laugh, so was he. "Ensign Hooves however took the brunt of the hot gravy fountain spewing from the replicator and will be laid up for the next few days."
"Oohooh, dose this means I get to throw her a get well party," Pinkie chirped happily from her Ops station.
"Yes Pinkie, you have my permission to throw a party, once we are under way…" Pip gently rubbed his forehead with a hoof before glancing to Luna. "So, was it anything serious?"
"Minor burns to her left wing."
"That pour mare and her techno-dysfunction," he chuckled lightly as he shook his head. "Ms Dash," he finally switched gears and looked to his rainbow maned Helm's pony. "Have we been cleared to leave orbit?"
"Yes Sir," she nodded from her post.
"Then I think it's time for some well deserved R&R, set course for Apple station beta and…"
"Captain, Incoming transmission," Rarity spoke up, though she had cut him off, he could see that it was urgent. "It's flagged as Priority One."
"Put it up on the screen," he said after sharing a look with Luna.
"Greetings Captain Pip." The white face and flowing pastel mane of Princess Celestia filled the view screen.
"Fleet Admiral," Pip stood, adjusting his uniform as he stepped around the Helm station. "To what do we owe the pleasure?"
"I'm afraid this is not a pleasure call, Captain," she sighed. "15 minutes ago the Curser, Cutie Mark Crusader, was on patrol near the neutral zone when she was attacked. She managed to fight off the Klingons, but was badly damaged in the process and is in dire need of assistance."
"By Celestia, Sweetie Belle…"
Doing his best to ignore Rarity, he continued for the Admiral. "So you want us to lend a hoof?"
"You're the closest ship and can get there in an hour at maximum warp."
"Then consider us on our way," he gave a curt nod of his head.
"Good luck and me speed," Celestia smiled as she faded from the screen.
Slipping back into his chair, Pip pressed a call button and waited, not that he had to for instantly there was a response. "Engineering, Applejack here!"
"Ms. AJ, we're needed at the neutral zone to rescue the Crusader…"
"The Crusader, that's mah little sister's ship," he could hear the concern flooding his Chief Engineer's voice. "Are they alright?"
"Command said they're damaged and we are the closest ship," he quickly filled her in before asking the big question. "What I need to know, is how soon can we go to maximum warp?"
"Y'all have full warp in two shakes of an apple tree, even if Ah have to get out and push!"
"I don't think that will be necessary, Ms. AJ," he smiled to himself as he turned his attention to his helm's pony. "Ms. Dash, set a course to the neutral zone, full impulse and engage!"
Moments after passing Lexar's twin moons, Applejack came back on the com and announced the ship cleared for high warp.
So over the next hour the crew of the Fairy Fire busied themselves with gearing up. Doc Fluttershy had all of Medical preparing for the inevitable overflow of injured. AJ was dividing her engineering staff into 6 teams of 4 and had them pulling what they might need from Supply. And with the threat of Klingon's still lurking in the neutral zone, Jeremy had all weapons systems being checked and rechecked.
Pip was quietly pondering the situation at hoof when Rarity's worried voice suddenly derailed his train of thought. "Could you repeat that Lieutenant," he asked, swiveling his chair around to gaze at her.
"While we are still receiving the Crusader's emergency beacon," she repeated her last statement. "They have yet to respond to any of my hails…"
"hmmm, Is there a chance the problem is on our end?"
"That's a negative Captain," Twilight announced from her science station. "Rarity asked me to look into the problem a few minutes ago, and all communication circuits are operating under optimal conditions."
"Thank you Ms. Sparkle." He nodded to the purple alicorn, who smiled happily.
"Captain, if I may," Luna spoke up. "If the problem is not on our end, and while they not responding, their distress beacon is still transmitting…"
"Then there are only two options. One, their life support has failed …or…" he stated as a cold pit formed in his gut. "Ms. Dash, emergency stop, Now!"
"Aye aye, Sir," she snapped, slamming her hoof down on a large red button.
Instantly the warp engines gave an unhappy warble, causing the ship to rattle under a harsh vibration. While this was happening, the indicator light on Pip's chair, the one for Engineering, began blinking franticly. "Go ahead AJ," he acknowledged.
"What the Bucking Hay are yah doing up there? Do y-all know how hard it is on mah engines when yah slam on the brakes like that?" came her demanding voice. "A stunt like that could have depolarized the magnetic field coils, or destabilized the intercoolers…"
"Sorry about that, AJ, I'll try to keep that in mind…" he could barely hide the mirth in his voice as he released the button and cut off his Chief Engineer's rant.
"She sounds mad," Luna sighed and rolled her eyes.
"She should be," he chuckled. In a way he understood AJ's plight, while the Fairy Fire was his ship to command, it was her foal. Applejack had been the head of the Riverside Ship Yard orbiting Equestria while the Fire was being constructed. As such, she knew every system, circuit, and breaker that kept the ship running.
Applejack had been Pip's first and only choice in a Chief Engineer, and from time to time, he regretted it.
"Sir, Helm answers all stop," Rainbow Dash called while clearing the screens at her station.
"Thank you Ms Dash," Pip quickly keyed in the com unit on his chair, "All hands, this is the Captain, Red Alert!" Yet no sooner had he said this than two Klingon Battle Cruisers wavered into existence ahead of the Fire. Accost the bridge there was a collective gasp, all except Dash who softly cursed under her breath, "…oh buck me…"
"Captain, we are being hailed!" Rarity blinked in surprise.
"Well that didn't take long," Luna growled darkly.
"Steady as she goes, Number One," Pip calmed his dark first officer before giving a nod to Rarity. "On Screen."
(tonight the Klingon's will be portrayed by Griffons)
"Why… look who it isn't," the head of a snarling Klingon appeared larger than life on the view screen. "Greetings Captain Pipsqueak."
"Greetings Captain…" Pip let his words hang.
"I, am Totlh… excuse me," the Klingon gave a wicked grin as he reconsidered his words. "I believe you would say Commodore, yes, I am Commodore Razor."
"It's nice to meet you Commodore, what may I ask brings you to this side of the neutral zone?"
"We stumbled upon a distress beacon from one of your little ships and were on our way to lend assistance." The large klingon stated.
"Oh, How neighborly of you, we just happen to be responding to the same beacon," Pinkie suddenly piped up.
"Oh my, how unfortunate," Razor gave a mock sigh of sadness. "You see, the ship in question has drifted to our side of the neutral zone…"
"And crossing said zone could be seen as an act of aggression," Pip acknowledged. Deep down he knew the Klingon was trying to bait him, but he had anticipated this game and knew how to play it as well. "However, if you would be willing to escort us to the disabled vessel and act as guards until we can help them back across, it would be very horrible of you."
"I might be persuaded on two conditions."
"And they are?"
"The first is that you leave all com traffic open so that we can monitor your progress…"
"And the second," Pip asked, already knowing what was coming.
"I am a great warrior, Captain, but sadly, I have yet to test my metal against another as such. Now I could amble off and put that poor ship out of her misery…" the Klingon's grin was slowly turning manic as he spoke. "Or I could be persuaded to let you assist your comrades, but once they are able to proceed out of the neutral zone on their own, you and I, one on one… ship to ship."
"I accept," there was no hesitation in the young captain's voice, no, you never showed weakness to these bastards.
"Captain," Twilight hissed from her station yet Pip silenced her with a quick glance.
"Then it is agreed," Razor slapped the arm of his command seat enthusiastically, as around him one could hear the cheer of his fellow warriors. "Follow us Captain Pip, we will have you and your little ship there in no time."
Before Pip the view screen shifted to that of the two battle cruisers as they slowly came about and headed into the neutral zone. "You do realize that they are probably the same ships that attacked the Crusader in the first place?" Luna asked once Pip was back in his chair. "And that you just agreed to fight a K't'inga class battle cruiser, one of the most powerful ships in the Klingon fleet."
"I know," Pip sighed as he rubbed his forehead with a hoof. "I want a meeting with all department heads in my ready room in the next 5 minutes, and Ms. Sparkle?"
"Aye Sir?"
"Is there a way to scan our friendly Commodore's ship without -looking- like your scanning his ship?"
"Yes Sir, but what might I be looking for," she asked, still slightly confused as to what was going on.
"Razor's cruiser is an older model K't'inga and it shows," Pip slowly flashed her a smile. "I want you to look for stress fractures and weak points that we can exploit when the time comes."
"Sir, Yes Sir!"
"Applejack, I would like it if we could shuffle all non-essential personnel into you repair crews," Pip said while addressing his command staff in his ready room. "Once on board the Crusader, they are to break off and return with Captain Sweetie Belle to Federation space."
"Ah'll get on that as soon as we're done here." His chief engineer acknowledged.
"Good, now on to you Ms. Sparkle," he turned towards his science officer. "Have you been able to scan the Commodore's ship?"
"I had to passively scan both ships to do it, but yes sir." Twilight said while holding out a data-pad.
"Excellent, then please get together with Ms. Dash and Mr. Jeremy to discuss possible targets and hit and run tactics. Number One…"
"Aye Captain?"
"While the repairs for the Crusader are underway, I want you and a small engineering team to see if you can bolster our defenses. I want as much firepower and shielding the Fairy Fire can dish out without crippling her."
"Aye Captain," Luna gave a cert nod.
Sensing the meeting coming to an end, Twilight was about to ask a question, yet her captain beet her to it. "Yes Ms. Sparkle, once we reach the Crusader, any crew who have relatives aboard her, may go and visit for a while."
"Thank you Captain," Twilight, Rarity and Applejack said as one.
"Ooo, Ooo…"
"Yes Pinkie," Pip wasn't sure why the hyper mare had her hoof in the air and shaking it violently, this was a meeting, not a class room.
"Permission to join Fluttershy's team while they work with the wounded?"
"Doc," he turned to the butter colored mare.
"It's ok with me, if that's ok with you captain," she gave a meek nod.
"If that's all," Pip stood and addressed his officers. "Then let's get to work."
It didn't take long after, that the parade of starships came cruising up on their destination.
The Crusader, which had seen better days, was a Kelvin-class starship used primarily for exploration. Her secondary hull sat atop her saucer section, while a single large warp nacelle hung below. As for firepower, while her 12 rotating torpedo and phaser banks, 6 pair above and 6 pair below the saucer, were quite formidable, there was a distinct lack of weaponry covering the ship's aft or secondary hull. The Kelvin's were for the longest time, the work horse's of the Federation, but were now slowly being phased out by the new Constitution class starships.
One look at the battered and pitted ship told Pip that getting her back on her hooves was not going to be a quick patch job. She had scars from disrupter fire all over her and three rather large holes in her hull, two in her saucer section and one through the neck pylon leading to her secondary hull. However, after doing a quick once around the ship, AJ said she could have the Crusader running in 48 hours.
While it was good news, the sight of the poor ship left Pip with an uneasy feeling in his stomach. Silently the little colt sat in his chair and wondered just how many of the Crusader's 800 crew died instantly or were sucked out into space…
"Captain Pip, I would like to once again thank you and yours for patching up my ship and crew," Captain Sweetie Belle said from her repaired bridge. "I just wish that the help didn't have to come at such a high price."
"Think nothing of it Sweetie," knowing that the Klingons were listening in, he gave her his most casual smile as he continued. "Just get your ship to the nearest dry-dock and finish your repairs."
"Are there any massages you would like us to pass on?"
"nah," he sloughed off her request. "This shouldn't take too long, and once done here, we will be right behind you."
"Well, again, thanks."
Quietly Pip and his bridge crew watched as the Crusader slipped from the Neutral Zone under her own power, before quickly turning into a pinprick of light as she jumped to warp. "Rarity, please contact Commodore Razor."
"He is already waiting," she shivered, knowing what was to come. "Shall I put him on the main view screen?"
"Please and thank you Ms. Rarity."
"Ahhh, Captain Pipsqueak, I overheard that last transmission," the Klingon gave a wicked smile as his face appeared. "Being a bit cocky aren't you?"
"Not at all," Pip gave a shrug. "Just showing the confidence I have in my crew."
"I held up my end of the bargain. Are you ready to do the same?"
"I am. But before we begin, I have two final conditions," the colt elaborated. "The first is no outside interference, if anyone from either side buts in, that side loses his honor."
"Agreed," Razor growled in annoyance, yet nodded. "And the other?"
"Whichever ship is victorious, must agree to give safe passage to any surviving crew members of the other ship, to the nearest neutral planet of their choice."
"Again, agreed."
"Then, my dear Commodore…" Pip gave a smart salute, "…Game on!"
Slowly at first, the two ships only circled each other, an ever narrowing orbit before suddenly charging one another. To the other K't'inga cruiser's surprise, the two ships were in a game of chicken, both careening straight towards each other. Yet at the last possible moment both ships veered ever so slightly. The shields on both ships sparked and became temporarily visible as they met and repelled the two ships away from each other.
Like the predator it was, the K't'inga warship spun about and advanced, just in time as a phaser shot sliced at her shields. Several shots slashed from the Gallows and impacted on their prey. Photon torpedoes and disrupters bore down on the Fairy Fire like a plague. Together they impacted into her shields, causing several systems to overload and the Federation ship to lurch hard, sending many of her crew sliding across her decks.
Quickly Razor sent The Gallows sweeping over the equine ship firing all her weapons, smashing through her deflector shields. The green bolts of energy scarred the white primary hull with ugly blackened burns. Swiftly Pip snapped his command and Jeremy sent a volley of shots loose on the aging K't'inga. The still mostly undamaged Fairy Fire countered, and the bridge of Razor's ship bucked hard as phasers and torpedoes impacted an unknown weak point next to the K't'inga's sensor tower.
The severity of the attack rapidly gave the Fairy Fire the edge to even things out. Very soon the sector was awash in chaos as both ships opened fire on each other, moving, counter-moving, pursuing, avoiding, organizing and scattering as the two tore about the stars, unleashing their weapons on each other in an attempt to destroy one another. However, the chaos also managed to ketch the attention of others.
Bystanders on both sides of the neutral zone took up positions to watch the two ships perform their deadly dance. Four more Klingon battle cruisers de-cloaked near the Kris Blade while three federation starships dropped out of warp and slid to a halt on their side.
More Shots lanced out from the FF and slammed into key points of the Gallows, particularly ripping large sections of hull plating off her dorsal spine. The bridge rocked and reeled and Razor had to grab his armrest with a hard grip, just to stay upright. Others were not so lucky. Two Consoles off to his left exploded, the fortunate operators being thrown to the floor without getting burned to badly.
It was then that the game took a drastic turn.
After watching the dance for what she believed long enough, Captain Gut Ripper decided she had quite enough of sitting on the sidelines. With a single command she sent her ship careening into the fray. All too quickly the Kris Blade darted beneath the Federation starship and concentrated all its fire on its underbelly. She was soon to discover if the old reports were true about Constitution-class starships having a far weaker shielding beneath them then above.
As for Commodore Razor, he watched in growing horror as Ripper ignoring all the Klingon laws regarding Honor Duels.
An explosion shook the Fairy Fire as Klingon disrupters ripped at the belly of her secondary hull. "Lower shields are offline!" Luna, reported, bracing herself as another impact rocked the ship. "Shuttle bay just took a direct hit Captain!"
"Casualties," Pip demanded while keeping his eyes on the battle at hoof.
"18 wounded, no dead," she breathed a sigh of relief. "We got lucky."
"Commodore, is this your idea of honor," the captain pressed a button on his chair and roared over the com.
"I apologize Captain Pip," Razor said, sounding quite sincere. "Gut Ripper is young and brash, she needs a refresher cores on Klingon etiquette."
"Then I intend to give her a crash course," Pip snapped back.
"Then she is all yours… I will not interfere."
"You heard the Commodore, Ms. Dash, turn us around." Pip ordered as he turned to Twilight. "Do you still have the readouts for that ship?"
"Sir yes Sir, transferring the data to Jeremy now!"
"Mr. Jeremy?"
"All weak points and stress fractures targeted, Sir," he stated from behind his captain.
"Then let's show that bitch how we do things downtown," Pip chuckled darkly. "Fire at will…"
"Change to flight pattern Gamma and skim above that ship, weapons, get as many shots out as possible." Gut Ripper barked and her helmsmen complied. The second K't'inga dived, but the Fairy Fire got the first shots in. Sirens blared and the bridge shook. With a bright flash, the weapon's console exploded and decapitated the warrior seated there. Instantly Ripper lurched herself for the console, throwing the corpse on the ground and taking the warrior's seat and firing a deadly salvo into the equine vessel.
However Dash saw it coming and flew the FF into a sharp upwards turn, heaving the vessel over the enemy's barrage as Jeremy again took aim.
Another explosion rocked the Kris Blade as the FF fired another skillful shot. Razor watched as this time the upstart captain's port warp pylon was torn apart by phasers and her main engines fell victim to a well placed torpedo. Instantly the Kris Blade went dark as she slowly drifted to a stop.
Still, the remaining four Klingon ships continued to stand off on their side of the neutral zone, seeming to have notice the three Starfleet ships now parked on the Federation side and not wanting to interfere… yet. 'Wait a minute,' the commodore thought. So many Starfleet and Klingon ships in such close proximity could only lead to one thing.
"Captain Pip," Razor growled, more disappointed in the situation now building outside the Neutral Zone, that the impudent Gut Ripper and her now disabled battle cruiser.
"I still read you Commodore," the little colt's face appeared on his screen.
"While I would like to continue our little game, it looks like the field of battle has grown too crowded."
"I would agree," Pip nodded his understanding.
"In the name of my family's honor, I feel we must end our play date here," Razor heaved a frustrated sigh.
"Instead of ending it, how about we say… postponed until we meet again?"
"Why yes, yes indeed!" the Klingon suddenly gave a bark of laughter, realizing what Pip had just hinted at. What an interesting way to end a fight without either side losing honor. "So, until we meet again Captain Pip!"
"I look forward to it, Commodore Razor," Captain Pip saluted before his image disappeared.
"Helm, Take us back to Klingon space… and if you happen to feel like it, place Captain Gut Ripper's ship under tow…"
On board the Fairy Fire, Pip was thinking along the same lines. "Ms. Dash plot a course to the nearest starbase at your best possible speed and engage…" he said as he stood and straitened his uniform. "Number One, you have the bridge."
The moment Pip stepped off the bridge, everything froze in place… that was except Luna and Jeremy. With a deep sigh, the princess of the night turned towards Twilight's science station and flashed a knowing smile. "So, what did you think, Mark?"
"An interesting mix of the original Star Trek, the newer movies, and the next generation," he said as he stepped like a specter out of Twilight. "And you said that most of this is Pip's doing?"
"Kid's a lucid dreamer," Jeremy filled him in as he continued to play with the buttons at his station. "If you ask me, he's got a lot of talent bottled up in that mind of his."
"A lot of talent," Luna acknowledged as gazed about the bridge.
"You know, even if you guys don't have television like we did back in my time," Mark stated while poking a finger thought dream Rarity's left eye, and getting no resistance what so ever from the fake pony. "You could easily record these as radio dramas and broadcast them once a week."
"Say, that's not a bad idea," Jeremy said as he looked to his princess. "All we need is someone to narrate the action and Pip's permission…"
"Then tomorrow, after we get up, we shall go to Ponyville and see what Pip says," Luna beamed happily.
'As long as it isn't what the fox says,' Mark thought to himself.
Star Trot cast:
Captain: Pip Squeak - Ship's Captain
Lt. Commander: Princess Luna - First Officer
Lieutenant: Rainbow Dash - Helmsman
Lieutenant: Rarity - Communications Officer
Lieutenant Jg: Jeremy - Security/Weapons Officer
Lieutenant Jg: Twilight Sparkle - Science Officer
Ensign: Pinkie Pie – Operations (Opps) and Moral Officer.
Non-bridge officers
Lt. Commander: Applejack - Chief Engineer, Second Officer
Lt. Commander: Fluttershy "Doc" - Ship's Lead Doctor
Ensign: Nurse Redheart - Lead Nurse
Fleet Admiral: Celestia
Thanks to Hadrian McKeggan for inspiration~